By Wayne Vriend
Fully feel every fear contraction. Let the fear be felt, held and loved, and thereby transmuted into true courage that can choose new love.
Wayne – Hey, Yeshua. Jillian just asked me if all the typing noise was me talking to you. I told her it wasn’t and then I realized how much I miss our connection.
Yeshua – Interesting how women can ask questions that are more than curiosity, huh?
W – Sometimes maddening, but only to the part of me stuck on staying small.
Y – What’s rocking your world?
W – You mean my cradle?
Y – What do I mean?…you tell me.
W – Well, it feels like a lot going through the pipe right now as we plan to leave in October to Mexico with a busy spell of painting contracts this past few weeks as we gather resources. Last night, I had this lucid dream about falling in love, and in it I was explaining the difference between falling in love and choosing real love, still based on deep desire, of course. I think the dream has something to do with Mexico.
Y – Now, there’s a great picture. People talk about the magic of falling in love, as if it is an unexpected accident; something they don’t choose. If they get a bit more meta-physical about it, then they suppose that love chose them. But, in both scenarios, their picture is that they were not the ones taking action. The only problem is that to follow the ‘I had nothing to do with falling in love’ picture is that a whole bunch of choices are coming straight at them. They are going to need to have a whole lot to do with the love for it to flourish or to die.
W – But, I still like the feeling of surprise that new love brings, like something that came out of nowhere.
Y – Being in life is being in love. Love moves every cell in the universe, and love moves every universe in the cell. It’s all love through and through. The feeling of surprise is just part of the juice of the game of renewed trust that invites us and encourages us to let in another big gulp of that love.
W – But then, for most people, the magic of romance seems to wear off.
Y – ‘Wears off’ is again a victim’s picture. The victim says, ‘Love surprised me by its entry and then surprised me again by its exit.’ No! You were too afraid to really let yourself consciously dream of your next phase of letting in love and how that might look and how you might cooperate responsibly to begin preparing for that. You needed to moderate love’s flow into a toned down picture of leaving yourself out of it. The same goes for seeing love’s ebb as something outside of yourself.
W – So, what does your picture look like in contrast?
Y – As you get more and more in shape heart-wise, you begin to accept more and more that you are love’s experiment.
W – Experiment?
Y – I know what you’re thinking. That ‘experiment’ is a bad word because many experiments fail. But love never fails. Love keeps its heart open in any circumstance. It is only in this way that love can come to know itself. The cool thing is that love is fixated on knowing itself in and through you. It wants to keep bringing you new love deals that feel like falling in love. It’s always up to the individual if they want it or not.
W – Usually it’s not a question of if they want it or not. It’s a question of if they want what comes with it or not.
Y – Exactly. Good point.
W – Thank you. Talking with you, for instance, comes with a bunch of challenges.
Y – Whadda you mean, man?!
W – Love always leads to choice. Choices always test the limits of our courage, challenge our identity, and challenge our current cradle.
Y – You saying that I do that?
W – I’m saying that you always advocate for letting in my next piece as courageously as I can.
Y – Okay, that I do do.
W – That you do do.
Y – do-do.
W – do-do.
Y – This is the essential do-do of life. Life begets life. Life moves.
W – And then we try to arrest it somehow, make it more stationary and predictable.
Y – And that’s all because we cannot accept that life is not afraid of death, but instead embraces death as love’s and life’s never ending opening to love.
W – But that takes some serious being in heart shape to dance with.
Y – Yes it does. The divine doesn’t want you to self destruct or suffer but at the same time, the divine won’t fret too much over your choices to stay stuck. It knows that love never fails.
W – It just has a longer term picture than we do.
Y – It takes the time it takes.
W – And we have nothing but time.
Y – Time to experiment and be in love.
W – I want more love.
Y – But that requires leaving the cradle of security that you currently know.
W – And choosing that… as in planning to give up my geography, my language, my livelihood, and this paradise of living beside the ocean and a forest and a creek definitely has its ebbs and flows of excitement and desire and, then, contractions.
Y – And all you are asked to do is fully feel every contraction. Let the fear be felt and held and loved. It is only as a fear is felt that it can be transmuted into true courage that can choose new love and all that it asks you to choose.
W – So then, it’s natural for me to give up something really good for something that isn’t a sure deal.
Y – It’s natural for what was a sure deal to lose its luster as it invites you to choose again. The luster fades as part of the invitation. You staying in a geography that has been a heaven to you can turn it into a hell. All the moralizing about ‘blooming where you are planted’ won’t change that.
W – And this is what leaves me inside of love’s essence…choosing what life is bringing me next.
Y – It really is that simple. Life always changes. It’s up to you to go along or not.
W – And if we don’t go along……
Y – You suffer, but love doesn’t really. Love moves. Suffering is a static state that doesn’t move. Suffering is chosen by the soul as a way to remain in stasis while more courage is cultivated to reenter the flow.
W – And whole new heavens await if we move with love.
Y – They so do.
W – From do do to so do.
Y – That’s what’s rocking your cradle, a newer and better cradle.
W – Why would we ever substitute materialism for this?
Y – This is the real ‘mater’ of materialism. Mother is derived from the word Mater. Mother realism.
W – Whoa. So I am moving from what we call materialism to ‘Motherialism.’
Y – And Mother wants to meet (realize) your ‘material’ needs.
W – I just need to let that in some more.
Y – Let your current cradle tip over into the next one.
W – And become very ‘Motherialistic.’
Y – Let Mother be your reality.
W – Okay, I’ll be a few days digesting that.
Y – Yes, you will.
In this blog series, Mission To Me Journal, Wayne Vriend shares his unedited and vulnerable journal conversations with Yeshua, who he experiences as an ascended teacher energy available to everyone.These blogs offer Wayne’s process and digestions with Yeshua as he undergoes internal and external preparation to hit the road with his wife Jillian and Christopher Tydeman to explore and eventually settle in Mexico and/or Central America in October 2014 to offer service and be in eco-conscious community. Read 90 Days With Yeshua: Modern Message From An Ascended Teacher and Ending The Money Madness With Wayne And Yeshua for more enlightening conversations between Wayne and Yeshua.