Coming Undone When Love Has Won

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Deep guttural tears.  Floodgates open to let out what has been constructed to hold back the fear.  The realization of the part of you that had been holding the interface to your relationship to 3D.  It IS your 3D self.  Trying so hard to manage and keep up a charade that it has grown so weary of keeping up with all the ways in which you were not fully in your heart, or expressing your needs.  This personalized self that has been the default operating system for as long as you can remember.  As long as it can remember.  

But as the tide of Love`s widening and deepening reach makes its way to your shores, the outpost of your most defended heartland, cracks in the facade begin to take root in the foundation of your BEing.  It come into your awareness over the course of time or hits you square in the gut in one fail swoop.  This part of you, the one so trying to stay afloat above the fear and the pain of not being the real deal, of all that lies underneath in the murky depths of its existential quandary, has started to lose its grip and can no longer maintain business as usual.

When you have enough of a YOU there, this part can let go into that.  Even if it is just enough you to lean into the Divine, something is being held in Grace.  A container for which the matrix of the former interface can come undone.  Undone from all the doing.  All the pretending.  All the trying.  It is a shedding of an old and tired energy.  One that needed a lot of propping up to manage its day to day survival.  This only comes into awareness as the love inside you begins to feel the Love that is already here and has already won.  It can not be ignored for it has already claimed you.  You are just working your way there.

The increasing frequency of light is pressing ever so much into the crevices of your needed healing.  Of what really needs to be let go of so that you can let in more.  The more that wants to drown you in its goodness.  But the Not Goodness needs to be felt first.  But when held in sacred space, this pain is actually a relief.  The part of us that has put itself up front to do life actually feels the blessing in it as the balm of your love and that of the Divine give the necessary medicine to heal and integrate.  

As these days continue in their upward spiraling, the more you will begin to feel all that needs to be felt.  This is why it is so important to have a way to hold this space within you.  To feel yourself just big enough to hold the pain and the fear allowing it to have it needed time and space without becoming it.  It is one that can be felt within yourself and within community.  We were never meant to do all this alone even as this can be such an individual process at times.  
As the dust settles, the digestion is made over due course, a new feeling of awareness and clarity of Self arises.  Not that we are truly done by any stretch, but we are another step closer to BEing the love that we were always meant to be.  To experiencing the true gift of our own inner union and sense of wholeness.  To open up to new relationships and sacred romance that bring us new layers of healing and deepening the waters of our cosmic ocean of wonder and ecstasy.  This part of us is forever honored and revered as it held what it needed to until it was no longer serving our inner rising tide of greatness.  Days go by and it will feel like a dream.  But for now, it is a sacred time of blessed messiness and coming undone in order to come home.

 

Gabriel Heartman is a teacher, men’s facilitator, energy healer, writer, poet, and heartist with the SoulFullHeart Way of Life.  Visit https://www.soulfullheartwayoflife.com for more information about space holding sessions, group calls, videos, community, etc. 

Visit our patreon page to offer a money donation to support our offerings at https://www.patreon.com/soulfullheart.

 

The Flight of the Angel King

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image by JULIANA KARINA VASCONCELOS

 

Spread your wings my Gaia born angel son

Release those weakening Earth worn binds

That keep you anchored, torn, and done

Feel the lift from within your effervescent spirit

That sings loud and proud of your childhood days

Where the only things that truly mattered

Were the things that mattered not

Taste the bittersweet tears of moments passed

Of the pain that was buried deep inside

The part that protected you from receiving more

Than what you could dare to bare.  

You have been saved for this particular time

This unique love sworn moment

To inhabit all you were meant to be

In the quest for the infinite sea

Join in union within your battled scars

The mating call of your deepest desire

The road less traveled yet traveled far

To the greatest heights of the Heart´s burning fire.

Take that golden chalice my glory sown king

To the shores of your not so distant brothers

Shine is destined light of days yet still forgotten

The time when love reigned and beauty retained

Call to your heavenly and star crossed Queen

With the poems of your deepest passion

The song of your strengthening yet still fragile heart

That opens the gateway to a universe henceforth unseen

This is your only duty, my son

The only reason to BE

Open that magical door of your once hidden heart

To days of unknown treasures and uniting the souls of HE.  

 

Gabriel Heartman is a teacher, men’s facilitator, energy healer, writer, poet, and heartist with the SoulFullHeart Way of Life.  Visit https://www.soulfullheartwayoflife.com for more information about space holding sessions, group calls, videos, community, etc. 

Visit our patreon page to offer a money donation to support our offerings at https://www.patreon.com/soulfullheart.

The Fellowship of the Kings of Heart

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I have a continued calling and desire to keep writing and inviting others to feel this archetypal King energy inside the hearts of all men.  This is even true for women, as they have their own inner masculine energy that has protected their inner femininity from fully blooming for the most noble of reasons.  They too can be healed to a King that helps to become to a counterpart to her arising Queen.  For men, it becomes one portal into our deepest essence as a sacred human in masculine form.  

I can’t help but to feel a loneliness that exists in the Heart of Man.  An authentic desire for deeper connection and resonance.  So much of our connection can be in the mental body,and if it does transact in the emotional body there can be some deep resistances to becoming too intimate.  There is a dearth of authentic, intimate templating that we have been exposed to, at least in my past personal experience.  I always felt more comfortable being more emotional with women than with men, but seemed to find more heart sensitive men to have relationships with when I did.  But there is another level of vulnerability that we never seemed to cross.  We stayed in a contracted frequency that had some nourishment but not a lot of growth.  

As we find ourselves on ever-changing timelines and raising frequencies, we are being exposed to our deeper needs, desires, and the pains that follow them. We are being moved into experiences of remembering more of who we ARE in our most authentic Truth.  As men, I feel how their is a desire to share this within community that can find itself to lean more toward mental digestions.  Or there is a heartfelt ache to connect in heart space but there may be no one around to really understand what is moving through you.  Or you may be blessed a beautiful sweet spot and are desiring more to join you.  

I feel that we are being called back into our most heart-open leading edge of service and leadership.  One that starts square in our hearts to feel all the places where we feel alone, forsaken, guilty, unworthy, confused, or in doubt.  There are many different textures and levels inside of us that desire to be felt and for some it can be a lot to hold.  The heart is seeking feeling and to be reunited with its soul.  Its King.  It seeks to be made whole and then expanded out into the Cosmic Heart of Humanity.  To lead others into the glorious NOW of our deepest gifts and magic.  To fly in the jetstream of Golden Consciousness with an untethered mind free of the energy that kept it in the dark spaces of our pain.  This is what I feel we ache for.  I least my heart and soul does.

And I wish to do this with other men in a fellowship of leadership.  We have such a huge part to play in this arising new golden era of consciousness.  To help heal the All by going into our One.  To reclaim our brilliant kingdom within full of passion, vision, and creativity.  We permit ourselves to live the lives of the Kings that we ARE and encourage and challenge each other lovingly to this grand place of masculine relationship.
I have experienced this with my good friend Raphael Awen and so much want to share this experience with other men.  I loved my male friends dearly, as brothers of heart.  I found myself on a new timeline, but feel them at times in my heart.  

This is a show of desire to be in a bond of like-hearted souls that have chosen to fully inhabit their desire for growth, healing, and building an Empire of Love.  I feel a new care and expanded heart for men everywhere, regardless where we are at on our quest.  I would love to serve the hearts of those so drawn to this fellowship and leadership of Heart.  I claim this inner kingdom for myself and long for you to do the same.  

Gabriel Heartman is a teacher, men’s facilitator, energy healer, writer, poet, and heartist with the SoulFullHeart Way of Life.  Visit https://www.soulfullheartwayoflife.com for more information about space holding sessions, group calls, videos, community, etc. 

Visit our patreon page to offer a money donation to support our offerings at https://www.patreon.com/soulfullheart.

The Springing Of A New You

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We are on the cusp of another equinox.  Leaving the longer, darker nights of the      winter´s season.  The phase of our cycle that had us going in.  Into our more darkened corners.  It was a time in many cultures when not much could happen externally due to the cold weather.  So it was a time of reflection.  It was also a time of destruction.  Life itself was taking a long slumber.  Letting go of all that had been alive and returning it to the earth.  Much was dying in order to be reborn.  

But now after much darkness and stillness, the light itself is finding its way back to a fuller state.  It brings with it more awareness and a warming balm.  That which was uncovered in the shadows becomes the seeds for new growth, new possibilities.  The days are longer in radiance and there is a renewal and clarity in the air.  Rains may come and go to bring the love needed for the integration and sowing to take hold.  You are being born again, and this time the roots are bigger and stronger.  More closely aligned with your truest nature.  

These inner cycles can occur at any moment and at many times.  They occur in an hour or over the course of a year.  With each passing turn of the wheel, something deeper arises in you.  Some more determined.  You are done with what used to be considered ¨usual¨ and are moving into a new season of authentic.  Or another layer of authentic.  A more You than you ever thought you possible because you now hold the key.  The willingness to see where you have been compromising and permitting.  To not hold judgement but compassion for why, but now no longer need or desire.  

You see the 3rd dimension in the rear-view, the sun setting on this old way of seeing and BEing.  The old connections and patterns that no longer serve.  It was the winter of your unconscious heart and now the birth of new life inside sees a new vision of how it could be, how it was always meant to be, and currently IS.  New life is blooming inside and the rains give way to the freshness of air, the clarity of sight, and the magic of rainbows.  There is a kNOWing that all will never be the same.  There is a birthing of new relationships, new geographies, and new sense of inner fullness and peace.  Storms come and go but the roots are firmly in the ground.

The High Summer of our New Earth lives inside you.  Being showered with LoveLight daily as you clear that which has blocked your leaves from its sustenance.  Your RISE higher, with each influx of saying NO to that which no longer serves, and YES to that which fuels desire and dreams.  It is the Love that you are made of that now imbibes you with the will to BE HERE NOW.  Flowing with the winds of your lover´s heart the tune of your galactic symphony.  
The cycle will soon no longer be for you will have entered a new river of existence.  A previously forgotten world of divine inspiration and circulation.  The time of No Time and the swirl of pastel colors among the sea of a starlit stage.  A time of Love´s eternal grace that recognizes it never began and can never end.  It the dawn of a new season of the Sea of Sun.  

Gabriel Heartman is a teacher, facilitator, energy healer, writer, poet, and heartist with the SoulFullHeart Way of Life.  Visit https://www.soulfullheartwayoflife.com for more information about space holding sessions, group calls, videos, community, etc. 

Visit our patreon page to offer a money donation to support our offerings at https://www.patreon.com/soulfullheart.

Healing The Heart of Man From Inside Out

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As more news about war comes into my awareness, as I do not read much anymore, I felt a ping in my heart and a desire to write about the nature of this and its relationship to the wounded masculine.  It was also inspired by an experience that Jelelle had that she will be sharing later.

In Heart of Man there wages a battle between so many different facets of himself.  The need for control over the desire to surrender, the will to resist over the will to live, the self-punishment over the self-compassion.  The Heart of Man is at a crossroads.  A place where the Soul of Man is to be claimed or refused.  So much of this inner struggle is playing out today in the Theater of the Wounded Masculine.  An ever present theme of triumph and tragedy.  Domination and aggression.  Withdraw and hiding.  This is all happening within.  If we truly want to be a part of another timeline we must first be willing to go inside and face our own inner battlefield.

Those that are in a position of ¨power¨ are mere projections of what lies in our shadow.  We must be willing to feel that if we are to truly change the energy that persists ¨out there¨.  These wounded expressions in male form are but uninitiated boys with deadly toys.  But they all have a higher self that is fully aware of this.  This is why it is so important to connect with your own as they represent a fractal of the larger sacred masculine energy in the universe.  When you feel your own unhealed inner boy and its reigning punisher, you can then begin to feel compassion for those who are in positions of power.  If we throw our angst and hatred at them we are really only doing it to ourselves.  The only power that heals is Love.

In the wounded boy lies his relationship to both the masculine and the feminine represented by his mother and father.  This plays out both this life and other lives.  The templating received by Dad in what masculinity is has a huge impact on his worldview.   The relationship to Mom and her feminine templating determines to a large extent how the feminine lives in Man.  This becomes an inner relationship inside of us that, unless becomes conscious, can have many unhealthy consequences.  This relationship to the feminine that resides within is a portal into our true masculinity and continued arising soul growth.  

Among the boy though, I feel a fallen King that has forgotten his true essence as a God.  Something happened that collapsed this union with the Sacred.  He split off from Source and there is a sense of longing, guilt, abandonment, and rage all swirled together.  When I visit a sacred grove of Sequoia trees that is my personal soul space I can feel many of these fallen Kings there.  They are wanting to be connected to and felt in their pain.  They represent a more subconscious energy that feels to inhabit a more lower 4D frequency. They know what is up but feel powerless and even worthless to do anything about it.  I felt tears for them as I have felt my own fallen king and continue to do so.  

But right behind them are our High King/ Angelic presence.  The bridge to our true essence as Love´s co-creative force.  The rightful heir to our Throne of BEing.  We ARE already that.  They are watching us and aching for connection, to free ourselves from the chains of our own making. One´s that can only be shed with Love and Compassion.  The more we can feel and connect with them the more of our true power we can embody.  The more self-love we can manifest and send back to the collective with open hearts.  

So when I hear of tidbits of news from 3D, I go into my heart and feel myself.  I feel the war raging inside others and send them as much love that I have to offer from my own well.  I feel each one as a sacred brother on their own journey of lesson and discovery.  With each new opening of love within myself ripples itself out into the Heart of Man.  Connecting to other High Kings to serve this love is my calling and purpose in whatever way that shows up, whether through my own journeys, writing, or spaceholding.  I feel the true masculine is a beautiful and powerfully creative expression of Divinity.  He so much more than we could ever imagine and  as we go into our own hearts and face our shadow, the true essence of Man is revealed in all His glory.  And a new timeline emerges….

Gabriel Heartman is a teacher, facilitator, energy healer, writer, poet, and heartist with the SoulFullHeart Way of Life.  You can learn more about him at www.soulfullheartwayoflife.com.  Visit our patreon page to offer a money donation to support our offerings at https://www.patreon.com/soulfullheart.

No More Waiting To Live

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When I awoke today, suddenly nothing happened

But in my dreams, I slew the dragon

And down this beaten path, and up this cobbled lane

I’m walking in my old footsteps, once again

And you say, just be here now

Forget about the past, your mask is wearing thin

Let me throw one more dice

I know that I can win

I’m waiting for my real life to begin

from Waiting For My Real Life To Begin by Colin Hay

 

These words found there way to me through an interesting route that is so feminine in its nature.  Seemingly random thoughts and exchanges that landed a song into my dock.  I was feeling into what I wanted to write about today and this song hit a chord and I felt to play it and see what tune it sings.  

For those that are in more 4D consciousness, whether just entered or are seasoned veterans (interesting choice of words), there can be this sense that something hasn´t quite shifted on the outside to reflect the growing awareness of what feels true on the inside.  There can be this feeling of looking toward the horizon waiting for something to happen.  In the song, he also uses the words `I have a plan` and `times are just lean`.  There is an externalization, a projection onto life, that it is not on our side or we need to take control in someway to create a desired outcome that hasn`t arrived yet.  That the passion and desire inside are conditional to some set of external circumstances that have to occur in order to be set free.  

I remember this well in my own journey, feeling stuck in a `good career`. Trying to seek many different ways to make it all okay even as I was still `walking down the same ol` cobblestone streets`.  What was needing to happen was what the song suggested and that was to be in the moment and go into your heart. Feel what was really trying to be felt and expressed.  Nothing on the outside could make that any better.  It was I that had to make the journey in and listen to my soul.

The waiting was just a suffering.  A denial to really feel what was evidently true but a part of me was afraid to admit.  A more wounded masculine need to control something in order to resist what was true.  By going more still and surrendering to the feelings, I could allow these feelings to arise and be held in space created by a more solid me and the much needed support of another to hold that truth until I could do it on my own more regularly.  Feeling the fears and resistances to claiming my own power from with.  True empowerment.  Not control.  

Being in a more Yin space helps to feel how parts of us are so afraid of actually letting go of a conditioning or a relationship that is keeping us stuck and in state of suffering.  There many that have done that for themselves and there are those, like myself, who needed support. It is not a sign of weakness but of strength.  Leaning IN order to raise UP.  Support and guidance comes in all forms.  The key is to seek it so that you may help heal it.  I can feel how this can be more difficult for men than for woman but that may be shifting as more men continue to find the value of going in and feeling all there is to feel to stop the waiting and start the living.  
That is what I wanted.  Tired of the mask.  Tired of pretending. Tired of the waiting.  Because there is no time than NOW.  But I hold so much gratitude for that suffering because it brought me to a more authentic place of BEing and living.  It made the alleged comfortable very uncomfortable, so that there were only two choices…and then really only one.  Let go and Go IN.

Gabriel Heartman is a teacher, facilitator, energy healer, writer, poet, and heartist with the SoulFullHeart Way of Life.  You can learn more about him at www.soulfullheartwayoflife.com

Mourning Dawns: The Gift Of Letting Go

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by Gabriel Heartman

You have been made Aware.  You SEE and FEEL how life is so much more than what you have been conditioned to see and protected to feel.  You cannot be made unaware.  You can choose to ignore, but it is always there.  You may not have anyone to talk to about it, or, as much as they want to, they just can’t understand.  You continue to learn more, to understand more, to feel more.  The Light presses upon what is no longer serving this new, yet stillborn, YOU.  It can be okay at times.  Just letting it unfold in its due course.  Other times it can be painful as hell.  For some it can be existential and down right scary.  What is it that can help this uncertainty?  

Going into the geography of your heart may find you are at the end of a line….a timeline.  An old way of being able to pull it all together to get through each day.  There may be a moment when you finally realize the two worlds…just…don’t…jive.  These could be relationships to people, things, behaviors, and thought patterns.  Whatever it is that is not aligning with your Highest Desire and Inner Knowing.  There is a rub between what you feel needs to be done to continue growing and how a part of you feels about that.

This can be a difficult process and the heart of what it means to live in 4D consciousness.  There is a bitter-sweet feeling about it.  There are bridges to burn, ropes to let go of, and chords to cut.  In SoulFullHeart this is held as a sacred and negotiated process in compassionate concert with a part of you being held in heart space by this arising New You and the open heart of another who has been down that road.  There are ebbs and flows.  Baby steps and great leaps.  All in the timing set by you, your Higher Self, and the parts of you so invested.  The more emotional energy invested the more negotiation needed.  

When the time eventually arises that a choice needs to be made for your greatest good, the space both before and after is big.  It is a time to take stock of all that the relationship has meant to you, whether it be a romantic partner, a family member, a friend, a suffering loop, a drug, a food, or anything else under the sun that holds this energy.  It is a time to feel what was learned, and what will be lost.  This is the Mourning Time.  This time has been held with much grace and honor across cultures.  It is a phase in which you fully enter the pain, remorse, or any other feeling that comes up in order to fully exit.  It is not a one day deal in many cases.  The mourning is a process just like the one getting to it.  But the more the mourning is inhabited, not with suffering, the more the relationship can be honored and made sacred.  

This is a time of reflection, feeling, music, writing, sleeping, crying, laughing, remembering, and a plethora of other actions that arise to honor the space.  All of it is important and beautiful.  The amount of reverence given to this period the more reverence is given to what is to come.  The rain washes away the smoke and soot of the fire to reveal the dawn of a new day. The air is fresher and the possibilities are endless.  That is the gift on the other side.  But it is one of great price to these parts of us who have held on for so long and for good reason.  These continue to happen throughout the journey in our ascension, and the more we go into them the less they will occur as we keep the spiral going IN and UP.  

I honor and admire all of us that have been through this, are going through it, and are approaching it.  This time can be the most memorable of all as markers into your New You.  It is so incredible to be able to go through it with others that have been there and feel the true courage it took to make these challenging choices.  I hope to be a witness to them in any way possible.  It is the magic of death and rebirth that fuels the propellers of Life.

Gabriel Heartman is a teacher, facilitator, energy healer, writer, poet, and heartist with the SoulFullHeart Way of Life.  You can learn more about him at www.soulfullheartwayoflife.com

 

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The Tug of Love

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You desire, wish, and sometimes physically ache for Love with another

It is encoded in our human heart and every cell in our body

But to call on Love is to call on You

To be ready, but not prepared, to show up for all that arises in each moment

For there is no planning true love

The fire of this passion and want can be met with meeting that INside

The swirling cauldron of your own Self Lover´s Love

Along with the fear that it is actually on its way

And the fear that it may never show up

It is all part of the terrifyingly majestic dance

That enters your world without warning and sets you ablaze

To find yourself opening up the hiding places

The ones only you visited or never knew existed.  

It can be a tug of war this tug of Love

This precarious tightrope of exalted dizzying heights

At the edge of what lies under the chasm of complete unknowing

The difference between falling and flying

Is how much you trust in your own ability to let it in

And give it out

The courage to see yourself in your Glory as well as your Fury

To trust that Love kNOWs better and everything that you thought yourself to be

Will no longer BE the same.  

As you have the chance to experience something Rarified

Undefined

…and Intensified by your own willingness to surrender to its calling.  

 

Gabriel Heartman is a teacher, facilitator, energy healer, writer, poet, and heartist with the SoulFullHeart Way of Life.  You can learn more about him at www.soulfullheartwayoflife.com

Ready to Launch

 

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Inside the heart lie the propellers of our greatest flight.  They are covered over by the weight of our deepest wounds and fears of our darkest places.  They remain scattered among the soil of our emotional terrain.  If we truly wish to bring our most prized possession, our humanity, with us on this next phase of emergence, we will need to go the places that anchor this incredible power and potential.  

Like a spring that has been compressed, we hold our own version of kinetic energy.  Stored in our emotional body, cells, and DNA.  For men, I feel many of us are in conflict with that energy.  What does that power actually look and feel like outside the unhealed domain of fear and control?  The collective shadow of that control that we share and are not totally conscious of at its roots.  We are not responsible for moving that individually but it does exist inside of us to whatever degree it does.  What rage still resides inside of our hearts that has yet to be tapped into and loved with compassion and understanding?  

Without going in and seeking to feel the answers to these questions there is something of our most impassioned essence that leaves us in a state of stillbirth.  We can try some end run around this by focusing on mental pursuits or spiritual bypassing, but the heart will always bring us back to itself.  That is a definitive statement but it just feels true to me.  It has been true for me.  No matter where you go, there you ARE.

As men, we have this inherent need for quest and journey.  For creation and manifestation.  For exploration and expression.  The fire in the hearth of the feminine.  It aches to launch out into the cosmos of the soul with reverence and also abandon.  It will apologize later if it needs to.  There is a wildness that doesn´t follow the rules and seeks to tear them down.  To make bold claims and empowered choices.  The masculine is on a path of fully embodying the sacred pyre and seeking union with its feminine counterpart.  More than twins.  Two separate yet catalytic co-creators.  

This journey begins in the heart.  Lifting and loving those anchors off the propellers so the heart can fly WITH the soul with the body as its vehicle.  It is having a relationship with this aspects of ourselves that mitigates this endeavour of the arising wonder of the sacred masculine.  Who are we in our most enlightened state as we lighten the anchors inside?  I am on this path inside myself daily through the SoulFullHeart Way of Life as the portal to my highest expression.  It has served much growth inside me and desire to serve that to others who are feeling the swirls inside them as well.  The feeling of uncertainty or desire for more heart-centered conversation and expression.  
The men´s group call is a container for Raphael Awen and I, to lead a meditation and discussion into our masculine hearts, our connection to the cosmos, and our desire for love and romance with the queens of our feminine fancy.  It aims to be a great launching pad for our growing desire for community and brotherhood of heart. Both of us so look forward to going on this journey with you.

http://www.soulfullheartwayoflife.com/events

Gabriel Heartman is a teacher, facilitator, energy healer, writer, poet, and heartist with the SoulFullHeart Way of Life.  You can learn more about him at www.soulfullheartwayoflife.com

A Heart-On For Sacred Romance

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Okay. So that was a little provocative.  That´s alright.  It was meant to be.  I feel like there is something in the masculine that wants to push some boundaries.  Get a little rise…sort of speak.  So some inner teenager gets to come out and play a little bit.  That is all part of the fun of self-discovery and exploration.  On the road to the Men´s group call on Saturday I felt compelled to feel into some writing about the masculine and was guided to just write about what is in my space as a man in the moment.  

It is a time of stoking the fire of romance.  Feeling what that really means as a man.  So much is written from a female’s perspective about romance and the desire to be in deep union.  For me, it is a new way of wanting to relate to relationship and union.  In my past I can feel how there were many unfelt and unhealed energies in my emotional body that made it difficult for me to be vulnerable.  To get into the messy of what was real.  Just wanting to be in a comfort place even if it really wasn´t comfortable.  Those days are no longer as I have been on a healing path for over 5 years now and feel way more Me here than I ever have.  A self-love that is wanting to overflow to another.

I feel that deep down all men want this too.  As vibrations are raising and Love showering down on us every moment, we can´t help but to feel this draw and desire.  To leave the old conditioning and patterns behind.  There is a need in the core of our soul to want to grow and expand.  It can happen at great depth on one´s own, but there is nothing like romance to turn on the afterburners and propel us into the reflection of some of our hidden places.  Now, don´t get me wrong.  I feel resistance from a part of me around that, but it is met with more desire to be vulnerable to that and let it work itself out in relationship.  Scars and all.  

There is an experience of life and ourselves as men that we just cannot have unless we are in a romance.  I really believe there is a phase we all find ourselves in when we have been hurt and just need the solo time.  But I don´t feel we were meant to be that way for long, unless the soul signed up for it.  I still feel in our human heart we want to feel transactable love with each other on a ground that is ever expanding and never stagnant.  The resistance to it comes from a protective part of us that has a very good reason for feeling the way it does.

Romantic love turns your world upside down. We just know that on some level and that is scary.  I have been beautifully upended twice in my life that found me making changes and feeling things a part of me never thought I would.  In the words of Kalayna Colibri, it ¨rearranges your furniture¨…and then moves your house to a different country altogether.  Your inner house gets lit up and some of the things you didn´t know were there or were hiding become highlighted.

In SoulFullHeart we see ourselves working our vertical self, the me to me, first.  Then there is the transactable horizontal ground between a man and a woman that we call the Usness.  This is the juicy place of all sorts of magic, emotionally, spiritually, and sexually.  This is the Merkabah that is created between two hearts and souls that can traverse galaxies and back again.  The kind of after-glow that can leave you in a fuzz for days.

I long for this kind of relationship.  I know that it is not all honeymoon but a concerted desire to be with all that comes up personally and in response to another.  It is an alchemical ground that offers so much in way of a true aliveness of being.  I feel there are other men that long for the same and the road there is through your own heart.  Though this was written from a single man´s perspective I feel those that are in current relationships can feel this in their own dynamic with their beloveds. What is it that we truly desire in our hearts and in romance with another?  

To my Queen, wherever you may find yourself, this was dedicated to you.   

Gabriel Heartman is a teacher, facilitator, energy healer, writer, poet, and heartist with the SoulFullHeart Way of Life.  You can learn more about him at www.soulfullheartwayoflife.com