Category: Birth Family Relationships

Choosing Resonance & Soul Family Through Choosing Yourself

Published on by Kasha RokshanaLeave a comment

by Kasha Rokshana

United in vision, resonant in desires, collaborative in lifestyle, catalytic in relationship, loving over all…

This is what it means to be with true soul family in my experience of it, where nothing real is transcended and is deeply felt instead, the intensity of offering mirrors to each other is not abusive, and the LOVE holding us in a sacred bubble while we deepen our purity within and together is palpable.

So many holiday seasons did I spend in disconnect with those around me, namely birth family. There were joys and there was abundance, more so than for many others, but the tensions were never addressed or deeply felt, just allowed to grow into a huge SNAP and subsequent unleashing onto one another. Fur flew, our mouths breathing fire in unfair judgments while chaos ensued, yet not ever resolve. I don’t remember much resolution in the space, only someone giving in sooner or later and often out of fear of truly leaving the picture and choosing aloneness for a phase.

I was especially fiery at times, parts/aspects of me furious that family members weren’t also awakening, that they weren’t really listening, and that I was still being treated like the ‘kid’ of the family on top of it all. The holidays were a mix, especially beyond 14 years old when my spirituality was evolving beyond the Catholic sphere and indoctrination of my childhood and I was also learning so much about myself. My awakening was both inward and outward and it was a lot to try and reconcile.

It has taken some time to be able to let in the soul family connections and intimacy that I have now, as over the last decade since meeting Raphael and Jelelle, I’ve had to feel parts of me who projected so easily onto them and other soul family members the same reality I was born into. These projections were necessary though. We can’t feel the pain that’s surfacing when parts of us project if we don’t, in a way, allow space for it to happen.

This process also created a way to feel the stark contrast between what I was born into and what my soul was choosing now… a much more sovereign journey, an empowerment from the heart, and a willingness to feel what’s at stake in these deeper intimacies in my life at all times… that they are a lot to lose and indeed I’ve had to let go of them a few times to sort out so much inside. I did this willingly in order to come back into the room with much more appreciation, more maturity and readiness, and deeper surrender to the love between us as well which is always purifying itself and each of us too.

This holiday season especially feels like a poignant one as dissonances become amplified and thus, so does the fighting, the trying to be heard, the needing to be right, and the desires to ultimately be with those who resonate, which can be quite painful as that ache intensifies.

I feel you, those of you who are on the brink of making a choice… to stay with birth family or even to stay alone as the Lone Wolf inside you may prefer, or to choose to pursue the journey of drawing soul family resonance and intimacy. It’s really the same journey if you’ve been in a dissonant romance as well yet ache to be with the man/woman that would truly be in your frequency bandwidth… and it’s all so challenging, especially this time of year too, for many.

My soul family of SoulFullHeart, along with our many parts and soul aspects we’ve met over the years, are here as but one option of where this desire for resonance and unity may take you. The doorway is 1:1 sessions yet also by-donation group calls on Zoom. If you’re curious to find out more, visit soulfullheart.org – our online expression of who we are and what we’re here to offer and become more and more every day.

Raphael and Jelelle will be offering a group call next Sunday, Dec 11, that will focus on the Christ Magdalene portal of 12/12. More info here: soulfullheart.org/events 🌹

From my ever-awakening heart to yours,
Kasha ♥️

***

Kasha Rokshana is a Divine Feminine Love Ambassador, SoulFullHeart Women’s Facilitator, soul scribe, and poetess.  Visit https://www.soulfullheart.org for more information about space-holding sessions and free 45-min intro calls, group calls, videos, community, etc. 

Ode To The 3D Self

Published on by Bianca MagdaleneLeave a comment

I have been feeling recently my 3D Self emerging out of the intensity of the 10/10 portal and eclipse passage. She is represented by the entire waveform of my birth name, Bianca Gieber, and has come out of the peaking of/immersion in the 3D/4D matrix that I had been feeling inside of myself that I shared about in my last post. Besides her, I have also been feeling my Reptilian aspect again, as both these aspects are actually intertwined with each other and I could feel that wrapping up in each other when feeling both of them. Feels like these two energies have been behind my Gatekeeper aspect that I had been sharing about and she had been protecting my 3D Self all along, with so much care for her.

When I started feeling my 3D Self, I felt a lot of shame/self-hatred, a filtering of life through the lens of it not being good/safe, self-doubt, unworth and that there is no goodness in life, that life is difficult and everything has to be fought for and that she has always been alone, left alone, especially by the Divine. That way, being a huge aspect of my Lone Wolf that was reflected in corresponding life choices. With that filter applied, the goodness that had been in my life, was not able to be received and seen as such but rather made into something bad or rather not real. A very painful mechanism.

I have been feeling with her the legacy of my birth name, particularly the last name, that is carrying all these frequencies and she has worn them like a very thick coat. But I could also feel that all of those frequencies/layers are not really her, her true essence.

I was able to feel with her her own rich and deep connection to the Divine, and specifically to Mother Mary, who she and my entire soul seem to have a special connection with.

In her connection with Mary, she came through as clearly and deeply as never before, yet in such a real and grounded way and with authentic emotions. The experience I’m having now with Mary is much more personal and intimate. The connection I have had before with her, as Bey Magdalene, was a bit more airy/lofty, but my 3D Self feels like is the uplink to a real and grounded embodiment of Mother.

Through her struggle of not feeling the goodness in life and feeling almost in a quandary about her loyalty to that feeling, the very clear and visceral message/intuitive feeling came through that Mother IS an aspect of me as well and deserves to be felt just as much as it is necessary to feel the difficult things.

The reunion between her and Mother was very deep and teary, both weeping over having missed each other and finally having found each other again. My 3D Self was claimed as a Divine Daughter and Mary apologized to her too that it has been so difficult for her and that she wasn‘t able to feel her and connect with her, even though she has been right there all along, all my life.

The forgiveness frequencies between these two have been so powerful and have had a powerful impact on my spiritual and emotional well-being.

Her question and lament, why she had been plugged in so deeply into the matrix, has been answered inside of myself too. Along with the pain that, despite being a 3D Self, she never really felt that she was particularly good at it/equipped for it. It seems that she is needed as an ambassor to those in similar circumstances and if she would have been really good at navigating 3D life, she might not have awoken. Yet I could feel with her how this dimension/reality has always felt strange to her and that she didn’t really believe it herself.

A deep filtering of life through compartmentalization is falling away as a result as well as a need to ‘be by the book’ and a new flow and responding to every moment is coming online and ready to be embodied.

I can feel her letting in that reframe and new Divine/Soul purpose and how it is helping her heal her relationship to the matrix, her family and geographical origins that were both VERY dense as well as heal her relationship to the Divine.

I could feel so much care coming online in her that she has always had, yet had to numb because it was too painful to care and there hasn‘t been a container/energy to be able to digest all this care with up until now.

This care coming online now and my heart coming online through it in a much deeper way is such a gift that I‘m getting from and through her that I‘m so grateful for and that is so needed too as I have been wanting to feel my care for the world and humanity in these unprecedented times that we have never seen before. Yet a care that is grounded in and answered by the Divine inside of myself, to be able to digest and hold the pain too that comes with this care.

I can also feel an interesting relationship between my Inner Teenager and my 3D Self that is just starting to get a bit clearer. It feels like she has been a bit of a reluctant parent to her, yet also protecting her out of care for her. I have been wondering why I hadn‘t been more rebellious as a teenager, yet my 3D Self offered that it just was too dangerous to do that, with such a dark and abusive birth mother, whose energies and transmissions she had been taking in and absorbing over the years, shaping her, ‚messing her up‘ to quote her. So she felt it was much safer to comply, even if it was very begrudgingly.

I feel my 3D Self came in/was formed in my early teenage years as well, as a response to those very challenging and dense energies on the outside. That was also around the age my 3D Self had started to reach for alcohol to numb that darkness and abuse that came her way in order to numb it/cope with it. Yet only feeling that pain and answering it with Divine Love, will actually bring healing to it while anything else just covers it up.

Now that she has been felt and freed up more and her presence/existence deeply acknowledged and recognized as very much needed in order to complete me, miraculous shifts have been occurring inside of myself, as she is an important aspect of myself that had been anchored in 3D and thus was resisting to move into soul purpose with me and partake in the goodness frequencies in my life so far. Only through connecting with these aspects of us that feel they cannot partake in the goodness, the spirituality, the soul purpose expression is how we are actually able to do and embody that.

She is an ambassador in her own rights and we already started that journey in meditation space this morning when she and Mary organized an apparition in my hometown in Austria that is so dense, in so much pain and that doesn’t seem to have a lot of hope and Divine Inspiration. Casting those beautiful Divine frequencies over my hometown felt so healing and felt like it inspired something in its residents and at least planted a seed in them. A remembrance of their own Divinity.

Here is a meditation to connect with your 3D Self.

I’m so curious to go more into her relationship to my Reptilian as well as my Inner Teenager as I can feel it is a very rich ground. Some of that will be covered in today’s group call, I’m sure, that will be about the Inner Teenager. I can already feel more teenage sass coming online through connecting with my 3D Self and healing all the layers of pain that have been guarding her heart. I feel her off to the Galactic too, being a galactic ambassor and Galaxy trotter, with the Cosmos being her home.

Here is a guided meditation video to begin the connection to your Inner Teenager.

Raphael and Jelelle will be exploring the world of the Inner Teenager in our group call today at 5:00pm GMT/London/Lisbon & Noon EST. We will also offer a guided meditation to connect with your Inner Teenager, deepen the healing between you, opening up the bond that is just ‘waiting’ for you. More info to offer donation to attend on our website or on Facebook

Love,

Bey Magdalene

*** Bey Magdalene is a SoulFullHeart Apprentice Facilitator and Community Member. She offers sessions in German and English. For more information on community, videos, group calls, and 1:1 sessions with a SoulFullHeart Facilitator, visit soulfullheart.org.

Navigating The Void Between Letting Go & Letting In

Published on by Kasha RokshanaLeave a comment

by Kasha Rokshana

You can’t truly come ‘home’ to yourself, your soul, in a whole NEW way unless you leave the ‘home’ you’ve known. The ‘home’ that has so often felt both comfortable and uncomfortable. The nest that has become prickly in order to help you find your wings and take flight into the higher dimensions you’re meant to be and truly LIVE in… in your relationships, in your money-earning/exchange with the world, in your soul purpose expression, in your soul family connections, and in your physical, emotional, spiritual, and mental bodies too. 

Letting go to let in is a very real and ongoing process and it’s so often NOT easy to be with. It’s very sobering to suddenly realize that your soul is feeling more and more ready to say ‘yes’ to the alive choice points in front of you, which may involve saying ‘no’ to something that was once very precious to you. 

For me, that’s been the process of letting go of my sacred union with Gabriel, grieving a ground that was once good but needed to dissolve for both our sakes and for the sake of our deepest growth and needs. This is the recent process of letting go into the unknown for me, yet over the last decade of my life this has meant saying ‘goodbye’ to birth family connections that no longer had a ground of shared resonance, same thing with old friendships… not to mention different geographies that once held the frequency of ‘home’.

Letting go requires a lot of courage for you and parts of you, as it asks you to enter the void of the unknown for a time… but the inward-turning of that phase is so sacred, I’ve found. It’s a time of true death and rebirth as you continue to rediscover yourself without the anchors that shifted at some point from healthily grounding to now being dampening. Maybe in some ways they were always dampening, actually… yet to begin to recognize this pattern too takes so much courage in and of itself, and so much readiness from the parts of you who have been afraid to imagine, let alone begin to see or be guided by, anything else that could be possible. 

I’ve found that the ‘void’ space in between the letting go and letting in is full of grief, yet also full of every gift that comes with truly feeling that grief. It is filled by creativity, by a new sense of you, by a blossoming flower garden within you that is being watered by every tear you shed and by the love within you and with the Divine that answers that grief. 

May you feel so much love surrounding and moving with you as you continue your own journey of letting go, of moving onward by going inward…

Love,

Kasha 

***

Kasha Rokshana is a Divine Feminine Love Ambassador, SoulFullHeart Women’s Facilitator, soul scribe, and poetess.  Visit https://www.soulfullheart.org for more information about space-holding sessions and free 45-min intro calls, group calls, videos, community, etc. 

Moving Beyond Fear-Based ‘Tolerance’ Of Dissonance During Awakenings & Growth

Published on by Kasha RokshanaLeave a comment

by Kasha Rokshana

“Tolerance” is really such a terrible word. I don’t particularly like it. Because it makes parts of us feel like they are obliged to let things go that really they shouldn’t have to. It’s one of the most misinformed tenants of modern society. Tolerance is not compassion or understanding, let alone love, and it actually typically comes from fear, especially the fear of you yourself not being ‘tolerated’ let alone actually felt or understood.

If you find yourself tolerating a dead marriage, a dead relationship to birth family, a dead connection to your livelihood, rather than seeking and humbly taking risks for the sake of aliveness, then you’re likely in a place of having been coached, told, conditioned into feeling like as long as you’re tolerating these dead things, you’re ‘doing something right’ and dare I say, even reaching the carrot of ‘enlightenment’.

No one is entitled to your tolerance, not even the parts of you that ask for it. Just as people on the outside of you basically tell you ‘don’t look over here, you have to accept me as I AM’, parts of you can do that too. They don’t want you to see their manipulative strategies or ways of controlling the people in your life that you don’t resonate with so that they don’t have to experience real and true growth and what actually COULD become possible in ALL of your relationships.

Tolerance becomes intolerance, sometimes quickly, as awakenings happen and these awakenings lead quickly to depression and anxiety when this intolerance is not honoured or felt. You are changing. And if you’re a big soul, you’ve likely felt how quickly you change and shift at times and are oftentimes tiptoeing around your relationships rather than letting your awakenings truly ride with you into a new life phase.

Death and rebirth is always a part of awakening, whether it’s the kind of death and rebirth that is very, very dark for a time or the kind that is actually much easier to move through. I can assure you though, that if parts of you still buy the 3D Matrix or New Age Spirituality Matrix shit of ‘you have to find a way to make this work because that’s what real love does’, then you are in for more difficulty, not less, whether it manifests in physical illness, emotional waves you fall under rather than feel able to come to terms with (note, I didn’t say ‘control’), or a feeling of existential crisis that keeps growing until parts of you can no longer stuff it down.

Awakening, truly expanding into your heart and soul and letting them lead, is not about tolerating anything or anyone. Yet, as this intolerance is felt and honoured, true compassion can be felt as well as authentic passion. You change, and even if the people around you can’t, you are empowered to navigate your way through that and find new people to be around, even if you need a phase of being ‘alone’ (which is never alone, truly, for the Divine is ALWAYS there and sometimes it takes the lonely feelings to actually drop into Its arms at last).

If you truly have a penchant for your deepest growth, you’ll find a way to feel what you’ve been allowing that actually doesn’t feel good to you. Our gut honesty is what brings us the most growth and the most Divine alignment, even in all its messiness and absolute dearth of glamour. There is NO such thing as an ‘ugly cry’, especially when what you’re feeling is the grief of what perhaps once worked, what once was beautiful and resonant, and you’re feeling into letting it go for the sake of all involved…

I love you. Keep feeling. Keep moving beyond tolerance and you WILL find your truth, whether you end up needing to move into deep life change right away or not. Your awakenings will deepen and your experience of your soul will too, even in all of the waves of exquisite sadness, necessary rage, and openings into bittersweet bliss.

Love,
Kasha

***

Kasha Rokshana is a Divine Feminine Love Ambassador, SoulFullHeart Women’s Facilitator, soul scribe, and poetess.  Visit https://www.soulfullheart.org for more information about space holding sessions and free 45-min intro calls, group calls, videos, community, etc. 

Healing The Ancestral Ties That Bind

Published on by Gabriel AmaraLeave a comment

Working with a current facilitant/soul sister in our SoulFullHeart healing work has illuminated the power of ancestral and familial lineages. They hold DEEP third and fourth dimensional conditionings, contracts, and karmic binds. There are stories/psychic energies that pervade our emotional and spiritual bodies that can also wreak havoc on the physical body.

The process is a bit like untangling a knotted ball of different string, each one connected to a family member, relative, or ancestor. This disentanglement is a deep dive into how we have taken on so much of our family’s wounding and even our own culture’s assumptions, views, and ingrained beliefs about ourselves as men, women, humanity, and life itself.

There is no ‘easy’ way to do this. One might be able to transcend this ball for a time, but it does live deep within our DNA and our subconscious. There are those that see and feel the need for meeting and untangling this lineage for all the gifts that it can offer in regards to the awakening of who and what we really are in our individuated and Divine Self purpose.

It is also a way to see what is good and true about our ancestral lineage underneath the hijacked version of it. We all come from very powerful and beautiful branches off the same sacred human tree. Over the decades, centuries, and millennia there has been a corrosive influence within each of these lineages, or ‘lines over the ages’. As you heal each one of them back to its source, you purify and beautify them back to their origins within you.

It is a deep and transformative clearing, met at times with anger and rage, other times with deep and guttural tears for all that you have held as the One who has chosen to heal this line before this incarnation. ‘The Ancestral Buck Stops Here’ imprinted on your soul badge. This is an epic, brave, and courageous task to uphold. It is also not easy.

This is why we take one step at a time to meet it all with grace, compassion, and self-love. Sometimes you may not even know you have signed up for this kind of mission until you deepen in your healing journey. Once you start on a personal healing path, you find something even more quantum and bigger than yourself.

This is not meant to be seen as a David vs. Goliath, but rather a piece-by-piece, part-by-part, aspect-by-aspect unfolding. One that strips away all that you thought was yours and no longer wants to be. You arise into an unknown and unknowable You, while integrating all that is real and beautiful from where you came.

This is dedicated to all of those that have taken on this path and continue to do so. Thank you for your service and your transformation. It is a gift to the world and the lineage you have come from. If you wish to know more about how SoulFullHeart can assist in this ancestral and familial healing, please get in touch for a free 45-minute introductory call at: http://www.soulfullheart.org/sessions.

*****

Gabriel Amara is a SoulFullHeart Facilitator for both men and women. Visit https://www.soulfullheart.org for more information about sessions, group calls/events, videos, community, etc.

Inner Discovery, Outer Changes: Truly Embracing Your Bigness

Published on by Kasha RokshanaLeave a comment

by Kasha Rokshana

There are a couple of truths that I’ve lived into and that I’ve supported others in sessions to live into, and they are:

In a world at ‘war’, the only place you can end it is within.

In life circumstances that are abusive on ANY level, the only place you can reconcile that is within.

And then, another even bigger truth, is that there’s a potent invitation from the Divine and your Divine Self as you live into this. This invitation is to take outer action, rooted in the deeper inner work/remembering/healing processes within your clearing heart and soul soil, and rippling out into your life circumstances.

This doesn’t mean joining the ‘war’ that others insist on living out from their own inner worlds, for that self-righteous energy you’ll inevitably become doesn’t serve you or them and will always end in a stalemate (I’ve lived this one out a few times!) and/or some slight openings in your relationship that won’t last unless they are truly on the same page of doing some dedicated deep-diving inside.

It seems like it’s somewhat controversial to offer that not only setting boundaries but sometimes choosing to leave inherently non-resonant relationships of ALL kinds is actually GOOD for you and for them. You weren’t ultimately meant to live only in these grounds which will always lead to battling somehow or a reality of ‘pushing against’ on some level, even if it’s mostly energetic and not so much outright anymore.

The role of the ‘awakener’ or ‘red-piller’ of others is one rooted not in your inner peace or sanctuary but in parts of you that are afraid to be alone and in surrender to the unknown, to experience that biting (yet also alchemical) loneliness and fear that can really hurt and drop you, truly drop you, into what’s REAL inside of you and in your life. Whenever I’ve taken on this role with others, there’s been huge resentment on all sides and a self-centered ‘holier-than-thou’ energy that I had to realize was about tugging on those around me rather than truly loving them. It was about trying to arise into my own bigness and be seen by them rather than letting them go their way as I go mine.

This letting go of your end of the rope is where your real mission and sense of purpose can stem from, as you allow the space to recover from what parts of you once thought of as ‘normal’. The karmic layout of these relationships completes when you, as your awakening/integrating Divine Self, decide that it’s done. So often this is left unrealized, yet it’s the most powerful ‘NO MORE’ you could say on behalf of yourself and all precious parts of you, plus any Metasoul aspects from other lifetimes at play.

I KNOW how difficult this is, as the vitriol and clamour you can draw out of those you are now saying ‘no’ to is painful to take in, revealing the deeper and more accurate reality of your relationships… you see where you have been shrinking to fit in order to keep up appearances or allow a connection to go on and on with some growth happening at times perhaps, yet now the dynamic has run out of ground and you (and they) need something else.

THIS is how you leave the Matrix of false light, false Mother/Father connections, etc. and can begin to reveal and heal how you’ve been a part of this dynamic from within you, where your own false light has lived. This is the ground where you can let the real Divine in, however that resonates for you. And it’s in this void where the truest Soul Family/Tribe connections can arrive and arise, for you’re now more in their frequency and no longer enabling your own suffering OR the suffering of those who know they are losing the parts of you they have known you as and asked you to stay fused to.

Arising into your true bigness is what this is about and as you TRULY do so, you sever the cords and unspoken contracts between yourself and others which are meant to either find new ground (for the sake of their own bigness awakening too) or dissolve completely (also for their sake and not just yours). You choose to walk away and move into your most authentic expression that ‘they’ will probably never get, nor perhaps are they meant to. Maybe that’s the toughest pill of awakening to swallow, to see through the once precious illusion of what has been let in as ‘love’ yet now you can start to see what living into and embodying love is truly about.

This does include walking away from government bodies too, not just your most intimate relationships. Your culture/country can also be said ‘no’ to, or at least the energies of it that aren’t resonant. You’re also invited to go against the grain of what’s normal or expected, choosing your places of rebellion as they fit and arise for you in your growing inner fire and truth.

This process may not suit everyone at this time as it really does have its own timing, yet it does feel so essential to feel into during this time of death and rebirth on the entire planet, let alone in your own precious lifetime… the dying, when it’s surrendered to, becomes the fertile soil from which the buds of the NEW Earth can be seeded and sprouted. With this dying comes a new way of LIVING that needn’t only be a pipe dream.

You don’t have to feel alone or unsupported in any of this as you open up to yourself and the Divine in a new way… if you resonate with what I’m offering from my own experience of this and what I’ve seen move in the processes of others, please feel free to contact me for a 45min intro call that’s free of charge so we can feel together if this process, way of life, and soul and heart community of SoulFullHeart may be a fit for you and you for it/us. You can find more info here: soulfullheart.org/sessions

Love,
Kasha

***

Kasha Rokshana is a Divine Feminine Love Ambassador, SoulFullHeart Women’s Facilitator, soul scribe, and poetess.  Visit https://www.soulfullheart.org for more information about space holding sessions and free 45-min intro calls, group calls, videos, community, etc. 

New Earth Needs Us To Choose It

Published on by Gabriel Amara1 Comment

I drew a boundary with my birth family and past friends about 9 years ago. I had chosen to ‘cross over’ in 2012 when that bridge opened up. There was nothing as divisive as Covid back then other than the politics of the day, which was still fairly polarizing.

Yet, I needed to fully step into this dimension I currently find myself with those that were doing, or had done, the same. My soul needed me to let go of the matrix I was born into and be reborn into something new. I couldn’t take the old with me unless they felt to ascend as well.

It was an expedited process, but one that needed to happen in order to fully be the Being, leader, and man I was called to be. No more smallness. No more suffering. No more lack of real Love. Sometimes growth and ascension come at a cost to parts of us so embedded in a deep-seeded need for what was thought of as ‘caring’.

The thing is is that I DID care. I cared about those that were closest to me at the time. I wanted something MORE for them. But I quickly realized that it was not their soul calling. It was not their path. I couldn’t make them come with me. I couldn’t ‘convince’ them or tug on them. This kind of journey can only be made by a soul choice.

Fast forward 9 years and we find ourselves in much more polarized and fearful times. Families and friends are at a crossroads together. Many are set in stone, many are arguing and battling, others are deeply confused and uncertain. This global situation is offering each of us a portal into our souls. Our deepest need and highest vision.

This may mean parting ways with those that you were once close to. Ones you feel you shouldn’t leave behind. There is a lot of Metasoul timeline bleed-through that is happening now and that has a big influence on our going-on places. There is also our unplugging from a matrix that we have become so intimately bought into that it is hard to unplug from. It is pervasive and intoxicating in its fear and its ability to seduce, distract, and numb.

These are not easy times for many. There are those of us that are being called to unplug, replug, and envision something new from the inside out. We are being called to join together in this vision, this healing, and this parting of the old. We are the seeds of New Earth, not the reformers of the past.

Difficult choices will be asked of us. We are being initiated each day into the New. Into our New Earth emissary and ambassador of Love to the matrix that we all co-created. What we choose today has an impact on tomorrow. The question is what does that ‘tomorrow’ look and feel like to you?

*****

Gabriel Amara is a SoulFullHeart Facilitator for both men and women. Visit https://www.soulfullheart.org for more information about sessions, group calls/events, videos, community, etc.

We are now offering our SoulFullHeart Portal on Mighty Networks, a private virtual gathering place for sharing exclusive content from us such as energy update writings and guided meditation videos, plus community forum threads with topics and groups that you can read, join, and contribute to as you want. You can join us at the SoulFullHeart Portal for a membership fee of $14.99 USD a month: soulfullheartportal.mn.co/

Surrendering To Our Sovereign Relationship To Love

Published on by Gabriel AmaraLeave a comment

The words ‘sovereignty‘ and ‘surrender‘ can be quite the portals for the masculine in us all. They are especially highlighted in relationships of all kinds. In the ongoing journey of healing my intimacy wounds, I have come to these gateways many times. Who is this ‘me’ in the we of intimate relationship? How do I maintain my own truth, needs, and desires without feeling like I am acquiescing or submitting to someone else’s truth, needs, and desires?

Before I left California 8 years ago, I lived a life that would be defined as ‘sovereign’. I was not in many relationships after my divorce, and when I was, sovereignty was a big trigger as well as commitment. Inside there was a part of me that wanted his cake and eat it too. That old wounded masculine conditioned standard. Intimacy was more about sex and having a good time rather than getting to the bare bones of my heart-truth and my deeper needs as human man.

Then I found myself in a sacred, conscious romance as well as sacred, conscious community. Those flared up that ‘sovereignty gene’ I want to call it. That switch that says, “Oh, woah! Wait! Time-out. What is going on here? I am I giving away something that I cherish for the sake of something that I am not familiar with?”. The question was, what was it that a part of me cherished and what was it not familiar with?

At the core, I found that a part of me cherished non-vulnerability and wasn’t familiar with vulnerability. Even deeper, I realized it was an existential fear of Love that was at the root of it all. When I felt the ‘me’ that was independent, sovereign, and non-vulnerable, I found a man that was lost, unhappy, and alone. Only he wasn’t able to admit that at the time. With anyone.

As men (or the masculine in women), we can so very much defend our sovereignty at the cost of real Love. That somehow Love and Sovereignty are separate and adversarial. I feel our relationship to our mothers as a pivotal piece to this equation. They represent that from which we were born from. We received love in one form or another and then we needed to break away from that to find our individuation. Our authentic manhood that needed to push away, but more healthfully could have been initiated into it by a more conscious mother and father energy.

If we did not have that, and I would say most if not all of us did, then we are continually in this push-pull relationship to Other. To Love. To Intimacy. Surrender becomes more ‘submission’ than an opening into vulnerability which is all done with our sovereignty intact. We actually can never lose our sovereignty. We are born free, yet have been convinced we are in chains. When you see those chains are really about our fear of Love and our deep separation wound, you start to unhook those chains one by one.

This is a deep soul choice to heal this wound. It is not an easy one. It brings up a lot to witness and feel. A lot to be sober about in our shadow. Yet, it also brings in a new sense of freedom. A freedom to Be. To express. To surrender into without losing ourselves, but rather re-membering ourselves. It offers Love beyond what we had been conditioned and wounded into believing is love. This is the sovereign journey back into true surrender and true power. The power of conscious Love.



Raphael Awen and I will be hosting a men’s group call this Saturday at 5pm BST via Zoom. We will be talking about these topics as well as offering a guided meditation and sharing space. You can go to soulfullheart.org/mensgroupcalls for more information.

*****

Gabriel Amara is a SoulFullHeart Facilitator for both men and women.  Visit https://www.soulfullheart.org for more information about sessions, group calls/events, videos, community, etc.

We are now offering our SoulFullHeart Portal on Mighty Networks, a private virtual gathering place for sharing exclusive content from us such as energy update writings and guided meditation videos, plus community forum threads with topics and groups that you can read, join, and contribute to as you want. You can join us at the SoulFullHeart Portal for a membership fee of $14.99 USD a month: soulfullheartportal.mn.co/

The Sacred Growth Of Letting In & Letting Go In All Relationships

Published on by Kasha Rokshana2 Comments

by Kalayna Solais

All we can ever feel with another being in this world is possibility, potentiality… nothing is ever a given, no matter how strong the vision of what could be or the depth of soul/heart connection that seems to just BE.


We are always sorting out and sorting through. We are taking in who we are through the reflection of another, directly or indirectly. We are choosing in every moment what resonates most for us right now, which may not resonate any longer in the next now. We are also this reflection, this point of resonance or dissonance for others, in relationship to them.


None of us are exempt from this sacred sorting out process or the growth that comes of it.
Let go, let in, let go again… be surprised, be enlivened, by new beginnings and even necessary collapses. Though there is always more to feel and be with in all of this, and many reactions pinging for parts of you, it’s all part of the process of deepening your intimacy with yourself and with others as well, whether they can continue to connect with you on the next leg of your individual journeys, or not.


Each and every time I walk this out… I’m surprised by what it opens out within me. The clarity of what I want next, the boundaries I need to hold with an open heart, are priceless to feel and honour. It’s always challenging in new ways, but feeling the trust in my own growth that I know is always available and necessary, that helps me sink and surrender into each crucible… and feel the Divine with me at all times.


Much love from my ever-growing and opening heart to yours,
Kalayna

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Kalayna Solais is a Love Ambassador, SoulFullHeart Women’s Facilitator & collaborator, soul scribe, and poetess.  Visit https://www.soulfullheart.org for more information about space holding sessions, group calls, videos, community, etc. 

Remembering Our Starseed Essence

Published on by Deya ShekinahLeave a comment

By Deya Shekinah

Every week the parts and themes we are feeling and connecting with through the ‘Free To Be Two’ group calls seem to be naturally interconnected, offering me a much bigger picture of myself, the world, and the Universe. 

My Inner Teenager, Yasmin, feels so connected to the collapse of the 3D Matrix. Feeling her is helping me collapse the matrices inside at the same time as I’m witnessing them collapse on the outside. Feeling where she was ‘plugged in’ through the school systems and birth family templating is helping me unravel all the beliefs and ideas she holds about who she is meant to be. 

Last week I could feel her in the school corridors, overwhelmed and unprepared for the huge transition that it was. I could feel her innocence, as she carried my Inner Child in her arms wearing PJ’s and holding a teddy bear. She quickly learnt to ‘grow up’ and hide her Inner Child and innocence so she could ‘fit in’ and ‘survive’. This created so much depression which I can still feel here now, as hidden with her childhood innocence was also her curiosity, her creativity, her sense of purpose, and her multi-dimensional connections.

Something that feels so rich within my Inner Child is this connection to the magic, to the mysterious, and to the stars. As life got denser through living in 3D, I forgot about the magical essence of my Inner Child as she seemed to get further and further away. I am now remembering her and feeling how she has been there all along as the one who was questioning everything and longing for Home. 

She feels like my Starseed, who is revealing herself organically as Yasmin is deeply digesting her experiences this life. She feels expansive, curious, and open to all the possibilities in this Universe. She restores the magic in this existence and reminds me of the bigger picture of all that is happening in our world right now. 

Connecting with my Starseed brings me into a deep peace within, as she helps me remember I have never been alone and that those who I have longed to go home to were always here with me, inside me, every step of the way.

You can join Raphael & Jelelle Awen today for the fourth call in our Free To Be 2 series, Navigating The Matrix Collapse to New Earth Transition, at 10:00am PDT with teachings and a guided meditation to connect to your Star Seed within, Star Family, and galactic consciousness. You can join live and/or receive the recordings for a donation at soulfullheart.org/shop or paypal.me/jelelleawen. More info here: soulfullheart.org/freetobe2

Much Love, 

Deya x

Deya Shekinah is a SoulFullHeart Collaborator & Facilitant. Visit https://www.soulfullheartwayoflife.com for more information about space holding sessions, group calls, videos, community, etc