The Grail Pursuit Of Soul Tribe

by Raphael Awen

The desire to find and be a part of Soul Tribe feels like it is increasing exponentially for many of us in the times we are moving through. 

It’s a feeling for me that has always been there in my life. At times, it has expressed in really applying myself to the tribe at hand, be it my birth family, my current circle of friends, my church family, a spiritual group, etc. What I found for myself personally was that the deeper I pressed into the family at hand, the sooner I found myself uncomfortably at the exit door to the relationship. While the exit door was usually an exit of my own choosing, as I was always welcome to drop what I was advocating for and needing, stop rocking the boat, and instead settle in for the life-long haul, I seemingly couldn’t stop myself from moving on.

Something has always felt at stake. Something has always felt that I needed to choose, to pursue, to desire, and to need. Something has always also felt that I wanted to be needed, to be chosen, to be desired, and to be needed. What has changed is the frequency bandwidth that I am broadcasting at in all of that wanting and needing. This then, in turn, led to natural moving on points, that I was being invited to step into.

Some people work hard to quell these feelings, and though there have been times that a part of me could envy living that way too, I keep coming back to a ‘search for the holy grail’ kind of living, and to do that with Soul Tribe.

My Soul Tribe is about the wanting, the needing, the desiring, the rocking the boat when the boat is needing to be rocked or even capsized. It is about the entering and the leaving. It is about completing one context of life so to be able and energized to enter the next context of life. It is about the endless curiosity expansion into the unknown. 

My Soul Tribe is about feeling all the losses along the way, to mourn them, to grieve them, to allow the next phase of Soul Tribe to arise and overflow into my life as I currently know it. 

My Soul Tribe is about feeling my truth resonate inside the tribe, where even a natural and healthy ‘conformity for love’ can breathe that isn’t a codependent grasping for love. I get to conform when I want to and need to. I also get to be uniquely different when I want to and need to. I get to do it all and be it all inside of community. I get to need and want love. I get to be loved. I get to feel all the parts of me who are in different stages of their own relationship to love and community. 

What is your Soul Tribe about? Are you in a ‘lone-wolf’ between phase that is preparing the courage to pursue again? Are their past tribe wounds that are wanting to be felt by you? Are there parts of you who refuse to ever risk again, while at the same time, other parts of you aching for real resonant heart and soul frequency community? 

SoulFullHeart is one such tribe. I belong to it and co-lead it. Session space is offered as the clear doorway into it. If it calls to you, I’d so love to host your inquiry further, all the way to the deeper and richer unknown that your soul can’t resist pursuing. 

Raphael Awen is co-creator, teacher, and facilitator of the SoulFullHeart Way Of Life.  Visit soulfullheartwayoflife.com for more information about sessions, events, videos, etc. Visit our donations page to offer a monthly or one time money donation to support our offerings.

Advertisements

Inside-Out Reflection

Many things have shifted for me in the past couple of months since moving back to Canada. Moving into a new house, experiencing a new social terrain, exploring new relationships, diving into new places within myself. Reflecting on the past year I feel how much I have cultivated for myself just by going in and putting my process first.

One year ago I was living in Mexico, I spent most of my time alone or with my community, I was living in a cheap apartment that I did my best to make my own, I was focused on my process and yet parts of me were still very good at avoiding the hard parts.

One year later I am in one situation after another that pushes up process. Everything is new, everything is growing and changing. I am experiencing things socially and emotionally that I haven’t felt in over a year and through that, I can feel how much I have grown.

If there is one thing I have learned from my experiences this year, it’s the importance of going in. I have had so much fear dictate and run my life. All for good reason, but it also ran out of ground. I got to the point in my life where nothing I did felt like it had any meaning. My heart wasn’t soaring or passionate about anything I was doing and feeling, I felt like I was at a standstill with growth and lacked any sense of inspiration.

Finally, I was able to open up to something new and scary: my inner world. Now that I have begun diving deep into my emotional and spiritual body I can feel the gifts of every phase of life that I have had. The phases I miss, the phases parts of me feel shame about, the phases I honour, my current phase of being. It has all been sacred and has led me to where I am today – which is just about everything I have ever dreamed of. But I know that I would not be able to see it that way had I not healed what I needed to in order to really let it in.

It’s hard to really SEE beyond the eyes when you have not learned to see inside.

It’s hard to love another when you have not loved your own aching parts.

It’s hard to have gratitude when the shadow is not honoured too.

It is hard to move forward when you have not moved inwards.

I still have pain, fear, anger, and sadness within my shadow but knowing that I have cultivated the time and space to feel and love it all makes all the difference in the world. I feel all of the people my age that have such a strong desire to feel passion and to make something of their lives, but if I can teach anything from my own experience – it’s to heal, with love and curiosity, everything you can first.

You can change anything you want on the outside and feel motivated and inspired but what keeps that fire alive is how you feel within yourself. How you experience and notice every moment changes your outer reality. I have seen and felt this over and over again and cannot suggest it enough.

I adore my process and want to share it with you, if any interest arises. My lovely community provides sessions and support through all of this – you can read more at http://www.soulfullheartwayoflife.com

Raianna Shai is a SoulFullHeart facilitant and social media maven for SoulFullHeart Way Of Life. Visit  www.soulfullheartwayoflife.com for more information about sessions, events, videos, community, etc. Return LOVE in money form: https://www.paypal.me/supportsoulfullheart or visit our Patreon page to become a monthly supporter: https://www.patreon.com/soulfullheart.

Being With Post-Holiday Emotional Indigestion

By Kalayna Colibri

I get the sense today that there’s a lot of lingering ‘indigestion’ going on coming off of Thanksgiving weekend in the USA, both in the physical and the emotional…. being with friends and family members who are no longer resonant with who you are and are becoming often creates a strain inside as parts of you shape-shift and adjust to the energies at the dinner table, suppressing how they are really feeling and reacting. Something that is becoming harder and harder to do as truth-telling parts of you like your Inner Protector, who has been observing and managing your relationship with your family and old friends, are becoming less and less tolerant of what isn’t resonant or feels like real love to them.

This suppression leads to intense indigestion in your emotional body, leaving you with physical and emotional pain too. If your body is reacting to the amount of food you’ve taken in, it’s likely also reacting to the energy of its preparation and consumption too. Checking in with your Inner Protector is a great way to feel them in their ongoing rumbles and to connect with the other parts of you they have been protecting as best they can from the sometimes quite invasive energy of those around you on these holidays that can be especially intense and charged with all sorts of unfelt and uncared for emotional realities and reactivity.

There are several guided mediations on our YouTube channel, SoulFullHeart Experience, for you to explore a connection with your Inner Protector.

The invitation is always to feel what you want in your heart and what you need for your soul. The real soul food of resonant relationships and soul family community is a potent energy to lean into for growth and deep nourishment. The reflections offered to you by non-resonant relationships are eventually no longer needed as the care offered from those who are doing the same degree of inner work as you is no comparison and is all you and your parts eventually will want to experience. It’s a sacred journey to arrive here to this place where the comfortably uncomfortable feeling of being around family members and friends who do not nurture your journey nor let you in enough to have you nurture theirs, is no longer desired. And, it’s just as sacred to feel all there is to feel, including the fears and anxieties in parts of you as you begin to let in true soul family connections and embark on the journey of continued growth and expansion in all of your intimate relationships.

Much love as you navigate all of these themes and tones in a way that is most meant for you at this time… ❤️

~

There’s so much deep support my beloveds and I offer through affordable, 1:1 sessions if you feel drawn to ask for help in the digestion of what has been indigestible: soulfullheartwayoflife.com/sessions

Photo by Cristian Newman via unsplash.com

***

Kalayna Colibri is a SoulFullHeart Facilitator for women age 25 and under, energy healer, soul scribe, and poetess.  Visit https://www.soulfullheartwayoflife.com for more information about space holding sessions, group calls, videos, community, etc. Visit our Patreon page to offer a money donation to support our offerings at https://www.patreon.com/soulfullheart.

Your Inner Thanksgiving

Today is Thanksgiving Day in the US. This day does not have the same energetic impact on me anymore as I am not currently in those grids. BUT, it does bring up a lot of memories and reflections. I know that it is a day for feeling gratitude for all that we have and had. It is good to do that. To have a reminder; to take a breath and just be grateful for it all, even the not-so-good as it can lead us to the healing places where there is more good.

However, there is an authentic gratitude and a false gratitude. One that covers over the truth that parts of us hold about all aspects of our lives from the people we are in relationship to, to our jobs, to our health, or to the circumstances in our life. A part of you may not be so damned thankful. Maybe he/she is frickin’ irritated, hurt, angry, or just plain apathetic to it all. Whatever authentic joy that does exist inside can be neutralized by these parts unless they get a place at the table too.

Yeah. There is a Thanksgiving table inside you. Around it lies all the aspects of you that have all sorts of opinions, truths, reactions, and joys. Your inner child can be relegated to the kid’s table by the parts of you that don’t want to feel certain things from pain to joy. They can be judged and ignored. There is an inner patriarch or matriarch that has it all under control and knows what is best for everyone. There is a protector at the door making damn sure it doesn’t get too out of hand or that no one accidentally slips and tells is like it is. A gatekeeper that is holding the cap on a plethora of metasouls that are popping in and out of consciousness. Wow! This day is full of so many trans-dimensional dynamics! No wonder we just eat like crazy and fall asleep!

I know this is a general and typical representation, but it is a great way to feel what may be happening inside of you on this day and the days to come this holiday season. It is actually the best time to really feel what is real and true inside of you. Making contact with this inner family is the gift that keeps on giving. It leads to the real source of inner peace and gratitude. You get to be the Head of Household and create a new way to celebrate on the inside. Listening, feeling, and holding these parts and making new choices of relationship, vocation, and geography that are more aligned with this healed and more authentic state of being.

To get in touch with these dynamics inside of you that may be creating a lot of stress, anxiety, or depression inside of you this season, all of us at SoulFullHeart are here to hold space and offer a heart-open reflection of the aspects and lives within you. To help bridge to a new world of self-love and self-leadership. I send you much love and blessings on this day and may it be the most real day of them all. That is something to be grateful for.

Painting by K. Amelia Bates

*****

Gabriel Heartman is an emoto-spiritual men’s and women’s facilitator, energy healer, writer, poet, and heartist with the SoulFullHeart Way of Life.  Visit https://www.soulfullheartwayoflife.com for more information about space holding sessions, group calls, videos, community, etc.

Visit our website to offer a money donation to support our offerings at https://www.soulfullheartwayoflife/donations.

Life After 11/11/11: Time To Fall And Flow In Love

Falling in Love is probably one of the most triggering experiences we can have. The feeling is not just related to two individuals but it can also be related to a geography, a vocation, a craft, a community, or a perspective. It also doesn’t have to be outbound. It can also about falling in love with yourself. That one feels like it takes a bit of healing to get to as we are so conditioned to loving Other rather than Self.

I feel as if these current codes coming at, in, and through us are advocating for us to fall in love. Just fall. Surrender. Risk, Explore. When we truly “fall”, we are letting go of all that we have been conditioned and taught what Love is supposed to be. We are also confronting all that we have experienced love to be or not be and how we have been hurt by it.

But this fall is not just a reckless abandon. It is a moment-by-moment feeling through. Not so much managed but rather lived into with an open and transparent heart. Connecting with all parts of you that are in fear and joy both. Or fear of joy for that matter. The deepest fear can be of losing it all, being rejected, or losing yourself altogether in oblivion.

I write this as I continue to check in with myself and my emotional body. Doing a spiral scan that is seeking deeper ground with my heart and soul. I can feel the edges of my next steps both in regards to outer leadership, romantic relationship, and deep self-love. I feel the part of me, my Gatekeeper/Protector, that is so very much confused and uncertain about this “falling”. It feels existential and alive at the same moment. Like standing at the edge of a giant orgasm that could swallow you whole. Fear and ecstasy both. What does it truly mean to “fall in love”, especially with yourself that gets to overflow into and for others?

This is beyond egotistical selfish vanity. This is a deep meeting of yourself in a way that is like meeting your favorite star, heartthrob, soulmate, and guru all in one package…and its YOU! What the hell? It is also surrounding yourself with those that see that very thing and honor it deeply as they honor themselves. You are doing “work” that can only be described as “Love In Action”. This feels like daily life in 5D. It is moving from Falling In Love to Flowing With Love. Yum….

But it takes some deep healing and inner work to get there. It is why we are here. It is part of our DNA to do this work (more on that later). What does falling/flowing in love look and feel like to you? Where does it get constricted by fear and doubt? How can we get to a place where the greatest love of all is truly inside of us? Feel all the parts of you that need love and that is a good place to start.

*****

Gabriel Heartman is an emoto-spiritual men’s and women’s facilitator, energy healer, writer, poet, and heartist with the SoulFullHeart Way of Life.  Visit https://www.soulfullheartwayoflife.com for more information about space holding sessions, group calls, videos, community, etc.

Visit our website to offer a money donation to support our offerings at https://www.soulfullheartwayoflife/donations.

A MANdate For New Earth Now

Last night my friend, heart shaman, and MANtor (mentor as a man) Raphael Awen and I enjoyed a night out together for the first time in a while. It was a time we intended to connect with each other in a deeper way beyond the ‘doings’ of our busy lives as we all engage in our next journeys separate, yet together in heart.

It is easy for parts of all of us to normalize relationship to some degree and not take a moment to just be in the goodness of what is, what was, and what we intend to be more of. This also feels to be a challenge for men especially. Taking sacred time with each other in honor and gratitude, or even much-needed truth-telling, wherever that truth is coming from or needs to lead.

Raphael and I took in the goodness of our surroundings, our own usness outside our personal romances with our beloved mates, and our history together as friends and co-conspirators of this starship we call SoulFullHeart. It was a tender moment to feel all that we have been through together in our history and especially here in Mexico. We could feel how unique our bond is as men and to feel how we have had the shades drawn a bit on our own desire for other men to be a part of a larger roundtable of heart and soul kings.

So we took the intentional space to let go of what was, honor it deeply, and open our hearts to more. More real, more galactic, more men, and more More, whatever that turns out to be. It was another layer of deep healing between two men that seek to offer it to other men in search of the same. It felt personal, global, and galactic. All that was missing was the cigarette. (Yup…I said that.)

Raphael and I both open our heart and soul journeys to men and women alike who feel resonate (and even those who may not fully) to explore their own inner world, this one and beyond. To take steps to heal and inhabit the practical, emotional, and spiritual steps to enter into a new relationship with self, other, and the universe at large. To open up your own personal disclosure project, click on the link below for more information.

Thank you for being a part of our living room. We look forward to more connection with you.

Gabriel Heartman and Raphael Awen
soulfullheartwayoflife.com/bridging-session

Gabriel Heartman is an emoto-spiritual men’s and women’s facilitator, energy healer, writer, poet, and heartist with the SoulFullHeart Way of Life.  Visit https://www.soulfullheartwayoflife.com for more information about space holding sessions, group calls, videos, community, etc.

Visit our website to offer a money donation to support our offerings at https://www.soulfullheartwayoflife/donations.

From Living Room To Loving Room: Celebrating Sacred Group Process Space, Community Shifts And Changes

By Kalayna Colibri

At first glance, our living room is a mess, yeah? Well, if you could vibe yourself here to be in this room right now, the mess wouldn’t matter… this is the best room in Gabriel and I’s house right now. The warmth as I sit here and digest what moved between Gabriel and I as well as within us individually and within the hearts and souls of my other beloveds in this space today, I feel the warmth of the love container that held us all… the love energies coming from our hearts to our parts, our hearts to each other and each other’s parts. It’s a powerful energy to be in and around and not one that comes without cost, without constant and consistent choice, without courage and a deep trust within that love is carrying us to our next layers within and within relationship to each other too.

This was one of our last group healing spaces together before Jelelle, Raphael and Raianna go back to Canada, where we all came from 4 years ago, nearly to the day. It was a beautiful weekend of connection and process. It was a time of bittersweet celebration and abundance of love… digestions of our journey together so far and how much we are going to miss each other too.

We are choosing this next phase of separation so that Gabriel and I can build our kingdom together as a Sacred Union couple, an arising King and Queen. Jelelle and Raphael have their next phase of leadership too, moving on from this geography to be in a new phase of grist for their own processes and also to continue expanding our community. Raianna will be making connections of her own back in Canada too. In all cases, the intention holding all of it and all of us is to serve love… to ourselves, between each other, and with others. We ultimately want more of YOU to be able to access and experience what we experience together… the gifts and growth crucibles of soul family connections and the catalytic nature of this work.

So, a messy living room to some… but a warm LOVING room to me. And you’re all invited to take part in your next steps, feeling how they may even connect you more to us in the ways you’re ready for.

Follow along on all our Facebook feeds, our website (soulfullheartwayoflife.com) our blog (soulfullheartblog.com), our YouTube (SoulFullHeart Experience), and/or sign up for our free weekly Museletter on our website.

I wish you much love… from my heart to yours. ❤️

***

Kalayna Colibri is a SoulFullHeart co-founder, soul scribe, and poetess. Visit https://www.soulfullheartwayoflife.com for more information about space holding sessions, group calls, videos, community, etc. Visit our Patreon page to offer a money donation to support our offerings at https://www.patreon.com/soulfullheart.

The Mirrors Of Real Love

In any true healing modality that leads to deep conscious transformation, there is a mirror that we inevitably need to face. It may be the Mirror of Validation and Being Seen. This one can feel really good to all the parts of that have yet to get that fully from within. From Self to self. It can also be really triggering as other parts may feel a little distrustful and doubtful of the goodness that is being bestowed as a defense to trauma and a lack of memorable experience in the True Love department.

There is another reflection, too, that is brought by the Mirror of Shadow. The one that parts have ‘unconsciously’ and strategically avoided due to there uncomfortable and unsightly nature. These reflections are just as hard to receive as they are to give. It is a growth edge for the recipient and the reflector, yet in this exchange is the well of Real Love. This can trigger some deep defensive reactions as we are being confronted with something parts of us have been blinded to for a very good reason. Even if the mirror is held in Love, we still may want to shatter it just so we can say we never saw it.

I have been given many mirrors in my process that have been difficult to let in. Even just recently in regards to the state of my previous living situation. There were places that were not kept up, maintained, and not fully cared for. There was a lack of reverence and respect of ‘self’ and ‘other’ from within me. It was not fully seen until the blind spot of defense was pierced through. This was a deep reflection of a fusion to parts of me that did not feel worthy of goodness and leadership, even as I am awash in both to the gills! This is how what we call our ’leading edge’ can illuminate what lies in our ‘trailing edge’. Where there is light, there is shadow.

I feel the vulnerability of this inside me. Of outing a personal process that has an effect on perception, yet it is this very outing that feels to be the root of the very thing that I am a part of leading. To truly lead, we must be willing to see and feel that which is not in the ‘lead of the ship’. Those things that we have still hidden in the hull and can weigh us down until brought out into the openness of the deck. To be fully loved and understood so that we can continue to arise into new territory within our own being that can shine a light to others.

This is the beauty and sometimes hard part of real love. The kind that doesn’t let the hidden and stuck places stay that way because others won’t let themselves stay stuck; who want and need the reflections as well for their own growth. That is catalytic healing and quantum service of love. This is the true ground of ascension when we are able to stare into the dark just as much as we love to stare into the light. I am grateful to be a part of it with those that care enough to keep it real with love.

*******

Gabriel Heartman is an emoto-spiritual men’s and women’s facilitator, energy healer, writer, poet, and heartist with the SoulFullHeart Way of Life.  Visit https://www.soulfullheartwayoflife.com for more information about space holding sessions, group calls, videos, community, etc.

Visit our patreon page to offer a money donation to support our offerings at https://www.patreon.com/soulfullheart.

‘New Earth Now’ Energies Inviting Us Home

Inside each and every one of us is a need to belong. I don’t feel it is a desire, but a substantial need that comes from the depths of our essential Unity…our inescapable communion with Love Itself, as my metaphysical mentor Raphael Awen would say. We are infinity and eternally in communion with unity at our core. This is the conscious and unconscious draw to tribe, family, and community. We need it because we ARE it.

Even in your most isolated moments, the ones where a part of you could do without ever coming in contact with another living soul (and there is that part at times), that you can feel the ache underneath. It is just that inside of the emotional body there lies a wound. A pain. It can come in the form of rejection, abandonment, or physical trauma. As we go into the healing journey there are this-life wounds that keep the 3D self in a state of guard and defense. Or a part, such as the Protector, could even outwardly seek communal trauma to prove that intimacy with others is not what it is all cracked up to be. The birth family can be a big source of this proof in the pudding.

In the Metasoul, there can be lifetimes of this communal trauma either from human to human, human to God, or archetype to archetype. It is a huge source of existential pain, especially for the aspect of us we call the Gatekeeper. They have been in their own created isolation chambers, and as Gaia continues her upward flight, these walls are thinning and they are beginning to feel the ache of that separation, especially from the Divine. This is another piece to our communal healing.

As we begin to awaken to our Starseed nature, the feeling of separation from our Star Family is a layer that takes on profound significance as a sacred core wound of the need to belong. The wounded Starseed needs to be felt in this abandonment trauma to fully let in the depths of our galactic mission on this planet. It is one that many have inside whether it has been triggered consciously or not. Our relationship to our Star Self is the beginning of a whole new dimension to how we relate to each other as humans. The evolution of our Gaian 5D Self.

Ultimately, the communion begins within from you to you, you to your parts, you to your Metasoul, you to the Divine, you to your Star Family. That sets the ground for relational communion with Other. A sacred union mate, a deep resonant friendship, and profound soul family experience. This is what you came here for. Not to be sitting behind your computer getting your social needs met, but going IN to heal and then going OUT to find more resonance. It doesn’t mean you won’t get hurt, it just means that you will be able to relate to the hurt differently and learn more about yourself to draw those that most see you the way that you truly see yourself. To find those that will water your goodness and challenge you to become more than you ever thought possible.

Welcome to New Earth Now.

Gabriel Heartman is an emoto-spiritual men’s and women’s facilitator, energy healer, writer, poet, and heartist with the SoulFullHeart Way of Life.  Visit https://www.soulfullheartwayoflife.com for more information about space holding sessions, group calls, videos, community, etc.

Visit our patreon page to offer a money donation to support our offerings at https://www.patreon.com/soulfullheart.

 

 

 

Relationship Shiftings/Openings/Completions Q&A W/Raphael and Jelelle Awen (Video)

This is a livestream on June 26th with SoulFullHeart Teachers, Ascension Guides, and sacred union mates with Raphael and Jelelle Awen talking about relationship shiftings, coming togethers, and completions of all kinds during awakening/ascension. They answered questions and responded to comments about sacred union, transactilibity and resonance in relationships of all kinds, parent-child transition into adulthood, soul family, and more.

You are welcome to ask a question or leave a comment on the recording of the broadcast and they will respond to it! They were also streaming onto Facebook so if you want to see the comments they were responding to, please go to: https://www.facebook.com/jelelleawen

For the latest writings, videos, and information about SoulFullHeart events, visit http://www.soulfullheartwayoflife.com

For information about a bridging session with a SoulFullHeart Facilitator and ongoing individual and group sessions, visit
http://www.soulfullheartwayoflife.com/sessions

Don’t miss a thing! Get SoulFullHeart’s free weekly Museletter with all our writings and videos from the week via email through subscribing at http://www.soulfullheartwayoflife.com

~

Jelelle Awen is Co-creator/Facilitator/Teacher of the SoulFullHeart Way Of Life. She is a Soul Scribe and author of four books about Ascension, awakening, and emotional body healing. Jelelle offers a 90 minute one on one bridging session with her over zoom for $55 USD min. donation with women over 35 and with other SoulFullHeart Facilitators…more information here. Visit soulfullheartwayoflife.com for more information about our NEW SoulFullHeart process programs, group calls, videos, etc. Visit our donations page to offer a monthly or one time money donation to support our offerings.