Being With The Inner Punisher/Critic

by Kalayna Colibri

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‘Parts work’ is one level of what we offer in SoulFullHeart. It is the foundation of our healing practice and path. It is what inspires us to keep going IN… into ourselves for more nourishment and love that comes from this work, and into relationships that will always be a reflection of our inner universes. There is so much inside of each of us as humans in transition, learning to remember who we really are. We are fractured to a certain degree because we have needed to become this way in order to cope with 3D reality and the heaviness of what we came here to grow through and alongside. We ultimately cannot really be fractured or broken or anything BUT whole, yet, ask any part of you and they will likely say that this is their experience of life – separation, disconnection, suppression.

There are so many parts of you that call to you in this work. One of the most powerful ones to work with is the Inner Punisher/Critic. This is the part that is so prickly and often hard to be with… the hardest part to really love, for they throw so much at you and at others too in order to keep love out. The more love you let into your life, sometimes the harder they clench their fists. They are so often afraid. Afraid of letting go of the comforting discomfort of how they feel about you, about others, and ultimately about themselves. They judge harshly, starting with you, and sometimes act stealthily, hiding themselves somehow, often amongst the din and cries within you.

Their feelings about your body, your relationships, your job, YOU and any aspect of your life, become normalized frequencies inside of you. It becomes normal to think of yourself in certain ways and you may not even catch the vitriol that comes from you towards others, even in the form of ‘friendly’ teasing, that really has a bite underneath it. After working with your Inner Punisher/Critic in the many layers they come with, your desire to be around any energy of criticism, ‘funny’ or not, especially from you to you, diminishes in a big way. Often it is these harsh inner frequencies and judgments that bring friends and birth family members together. It is familiar to feel this way, so the idea of questioning it may feel ludicrous at first. Yet what if something more were possible in all of your relationships and especially in how you feel about yourself?

The Inner Punisher/Critic can be hard to stay in the room with. Often when you begin feeling them directly, they hurl insults at you, rolling out pages and pages sometimes of how they feel about you and about your life. As your outer world reflects your inner world, you begin to see and feel how this energy has leaked out to others you interact with and informed your approach to yourself and to any area of your life. It can play out in themes of workaholism, exercising only for the sake of your self-image and ‘how you feel about yourself’, and abuse (the definition of which deepens as you work with this part and begin to heal these frequencies of self-abuse, however they show up).

The journey to genuine self-love must involve feeling the Inner Punisher/Critic. This energy cannot be transcended, only transmuted. The work and the room you must walk into inside yourself in order to start being with this part is worth it. It becomes like holding a kicking, screaming teenager who just needs to find their tears of release from all the energy they’ve held and the life molds they are struggling to fit into. This part does soften and change eventually. Yet they really need your help to motivate them with love, with an ongoing promise that you will be there for and with them, and that you will always hold that they are so much more than this job they have given themselves for very good reasons.

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Kalayna Colibri is a SoulFullHeart facilitator for women around (and under) the age of 30, energy healer, indigo-crystal bridge, soul scribe, and poetess.  Visit https://www.soulfullheartwayoflife.com for more information about space holding sessions, group calls, videos, community, etc. Visit our Patreon page to offer a money donation to support our offerings at https://www.patreon.com/soulfullheart.

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Feeling Your Protective Layers As Downloads Rain Inward – 11/11 Gateway Invitation

by Kalayna Colibri

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NEW inspirations are downloading for you now. Sometimes they trickle in like a light rain from bloated rainclouds. It depends on what you’re ready for and what parts of you are opening up to. Your Gatekeeper, who is another layer of your Inner Protector, gages and siphons off these downpours and INpours of INspiration that want to come to you, to move you into new places in your life, to help you see and make those tough choices and take those challenging steps to reclaim, re-energize and reignite the flame of self-empowerment and love.

The energies leading up to the portal of 11/11 this weekend feel like a soft caress and rock music, all at the same time… there is understanding and love from the Divine and the Multi-verse, and there’s a strong invitation to shake off the dust and awaken to where love is flowing in your life and where it may not be. It’s not a violent shake, yet for some parts of you it may feel that way in moments, as the awakenings come in and take hold of your consciousness, or at least try to. Doorways, portals opening, yes, as they have been continuously, and the most powerful one imaginable is the one that begins to open up to a wider aperture inside of you. This is the one that truly invites in more energies, more upgrades, more loving ways to be in this world. It brings in desires to tread gently yet powerfully, acknowledging how this can seem like a paradox to those who haven’t experienced that you can hold both of these frequencies at once without violence or outrage or wounded masculine expressions of toil and strife, or battles and martyrdom.

If you feel ready for the downloads coming in, you can ask for them, but you cannot bypass what needs to be felt before they can integrate in the way they need and want to. For them to truly go in with love takes a lot of conscious and ongoing holding of the parts of you that don’t want them to or aren’t sure it’s okay. Your Gatekeeper, who I mentioned earlier, is the main aspect of you that is used to holding and blocking so many threads of your potential awakening that they haven’t deemed you to be ready for quite yet (and that they haven’t been ready to let in themselves, either).

My own Gatekeeper, who I first came to know as a defensive Inner Protector or Guardian, is offering to me that my readiness is ripening after what has now been several months of working with her, yet several years of working with parts of me that were dominant aspects of my personality. She says, “the soul and heart maturity level need to match with the maturity level of the arising, conscious Sacred Human, who is striving for spiritual consciousness, not in a mentally-based way, and is deeply exploring their heart and wanting to know more, FEEL more, about who they are and why, who/what the Divine is and why, as well as who they could be destined to become in conscious and empowered co-creation with the Divine… It is important to let in the process AND the downloads, to not simply try and open floodgates that are meant to and need to be there… for now. And too, the Gatekeeper needs to feel this relationship with you as your healing Sacred Human self, to trust the Divine through and with you, as so many (myself included at times, in some layers…) still feel very consciously and unfairly separated from the Divine and therefore, from the powerful force and trance of love that wants so much to flood into you and them too.”

It is a major process to feel into, this acceptance of what is being brought in, and there are many understandable defenses that want to keep it out or filter it in a way that is perhaps more digestible for now. There is nothing that can truly be missed out on here though, as each opening within you does create this ever-widening and expanding portal of access to YOU and to the Infinite Love that is the Uni and Multi-verse we exist in and through.

So perhaps the greatest invitation and inspiration being extended to us all with this 11/11 portal, is more of the same of what comes in with all of them… to continue to acknowledge and deepen the work within, to let it be and arise and take a stronger, more self-loving hold on your heart and soul. To invite in a reality that is heart-based, that works with the mind and not against it, and with the soul in a more sober way. There is so much still to feel and on the other side of that, so much more to just keep letting in as we continue our paths of deep inner transformation that continuously transform and upgrade our entire world as we kNOW it and rediscover it, today. ❤

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Kalayna Colibri is a SoulFullHeart facilitator for women around (and under) the age of 30, energy healer, indigo-crystal bridge, soul scribe, and poetess.  Visit https://www.soulfullheartwayoflife.com for more information about space holding sessions, group calls, videos, community, etc. Visit our Patreon page to offer a money donation to support our offerings at https://www.patreon.com/soulfullheart.

 

From A Bud To A Flower: Sweet Sacred Union Beginnings

by Kalayna Colibri

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That feeling of being in his arms… finding our way back to each other, after years of being in and out of relationship together, depending on what parts of us needed.

The letting in of his kiss… the swirl of the softness and stillness I feel in me in the receiving, that is echoed somehow in his masculine sacred King.

The exploration of sacred sexuality… the dedication and passion that opens out in every curve, every pore, letting emotions rise and fall and tears wash away the remnants of painful times, phases of less connection from heart to soul to body and back again.

So much moves in and through as I walk out each conscious moment with Gabriel. We have traversed so much terrain together over the last 5 years, sometimes in a romantic bond, other times not. This time feels more real and realistic too… though we cannot ever ‘know’ and can only feel what’s true in the moment.

Sacred Unions… they don’t happen by chance. They happen as we continue the work we are so committed to within. That commitment and that cultivated love that comes from it, flows in concert with another when we are ready for it to, the timing of which is not exactly up to us. The timing of anything truly special and unique moving into our lives is not up to us or parts of us, though parts may try and sabotage or avoid it, or work extra hard to ‘keep’ it. Love is a flowing river that gets to be shared with others once your own flow is in enough abundance that it can. Until then, your filling up love-flask needs your attention only.

Everyone can do ‘work’ on themselves and draw different sorts of mates to them… yet I don’t know of any other work that draws Sacred Unions in the way this path of SoulFullHeart does. Working with parts and soul aspects is instrumental to the understanding of who you are and have been in relationship as well as who you could become. It is an incredible way to get to know a partner too and to let them know you. It is an unending path of discovery and re-arising for each other, again and again and again. Nothing can stay the same for long, for there can be no stagnancy in this work. As you heal and awaken, your partner is asked to go with you and you with them, frequently changing the ground of the relationship. Nothing at all can become ‘boring’ in this sort of relationship, where the mirror is constantly there, though sometimes at very awkward angles, and you are invited to care as much if not more about YOU as you do about the other.

I am blessed to be where I am with Gabriel right now… the experiences of deepenings and openings too, that come sometimes on the other side of tension and process both together and separately too. We have frequencies of all sides of relationship… best soul friend, deep heart lover, hot body talk and sexuality, sweet tears of feeling one another, times of merging, times of feeling separate. There is so much here to feel and be and be in. I am blessed, yet we have both worked hard to be at this level of process too, where we can let this bond in… though there are parts of us that resist it at times, that can feel how challenging this sort of relationship can be, that would perhaps rather just be single. Yet the hearts of both of us are committed to this NOW and the next NOW, allowing the romance to arise and move as it needs to, with no knowledge of how long it could last, and no expectations around this, though there are conscious desires too.

To be in a budding and emerging Sacred Union is a gift that comes with a process, that comes with yummies and challenges, both. And without this healing path called SoulFullHeart that holds and calls to each of us continually, we would be caught up in a net of unmoveable binds instead of illuminating bonds that can heal these binds. This is one of the golden trophies we hold very sacredly in SoulFullHeart… the light at the end of a long tunnel of necessary singlehood, that has also been held as good and sacred and blessed. Sacred Union is worth the precipice and trust fall within that allows you to let YOU in and eventually another too. And it is one of the most profound gifts of our sacred humanity expressing in conscious duality. ❤

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Kalayna Colibri is a SoulFullHeart facilitator for women around (and under) the age of 30, energy healer, indigo-crystal bridge, soul scribe, and poetess.  Visit https://www.soulfullheartwayoflife.com for more information about space holding sessions, group calls, videos, community, etc. Visit our Patreon page to offer a money donation to support our offerings at https://www.patreon.com/soulfullheart.

 

 

 

The Law Of Attraction: Being, Healing, Receiving

by Kalayna Colibri

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Yesterday, I was sweetly asked by someone to share my thoughts on the Law of Attraction, based on a Facebook post I reshared from last year. The original post was a very short letter to the Universe, declaring only a couple of things I really, really wanted… one of them was a new laptop, the other a new cellphone and the third was a sacred union romance. I haven’t typically been someone to create vision boards or set goals or even write letters such as this one. I remember that when I wrote it, I was riding high on an influx of energy from having spent quality time with beloveds the day before. We in SoulFullHeart love to feel and talk about our desires and to feel the possibilities alive in them, though of course we also feel the trailing edge reality around this for parts of us who are fearful or anxious about ‘not getting what they want’.

When I reshared this year-old post, I did so to celebrate that these three desires actually DID come true. It was very sweet to feel this for several reasons, one being that for most people who earn much money, buying something like a new laptop or phone wouldn’t take them a whole year to manifest. In fact, the way so many still live is for instant gratification, trying to satisfy needs, wants and desires as soon as possible, so that the journey to actually living these desires out is as short as possible. It becomes a medication for the parts who actually feel that nothing will ever be enough for them, especially when what they really want underneath the desire for ‘things’ is love… the second reason is what this post proved to a part of me that doesn’t always trust in the Universe or the Divine or even me as the one who is holding and feeling her. Yes, it may have taken about a year to see these desires to fruition in my life, yet they did arrive and the work to bring them in happened both intentionally and unintentionally, meaning that without being directly dedicated to ‘finding’ or ‘accomplishing’, I focused my work within, as I always do. There isn’t anything we can truly control when it comes to getting what we most deeply want. Money, it feels like, can offer the 3D self a false sense of control, as do books and practices like ‘The Secret’. It really isn’t up to you to manifest what you feel you want most in your life. And it isn’t the fault of parts of you if it hasn’t manifested yet, either. So much of this is simply not up to us, and that is VERY humbling to let in…

When I went into meditation with Kuan Yin this morning, I asked her to feel the Law of Attraction with me. She had me feel my mind and my heart, both. I realized that my mind focuses on logistics and doesn’t FEEL the desire so much as thinks long and hard about how to ‘make’ it happen and all of the obstacles or problems that may ‘get in the way’, including money, of course. My heart, however, feels the desires, feels the possibilities, and gets lit up by them or doesn’t. I feel it’s the ‘lit up’ feeling within, that sends out beacons of possibility and draw and also gives the sense of what is most deeply desired, versus what is only a whim or vague possibility. The energy we hold around all possibility is a big part of drawing it to us… do parts of us or Metasoul aspects feel despair about wanting a sacred union romance? Do they feel as if they will never get what they want in a material or emotional way? Are they trying to transcend these trailing edge feelings and wanting to only feel that it’s possible? We draw mixed experiences to us as needed, to help us see and feel these parts more and more.

Perhaps it’s a matter of ‘gestation’ rather than ‘manifestation’, as Kuan Yin offered to me that ‘being’ your way and feeling your way to your desires is really the only path to bringing them in, at least when it comes to the deeper ones. Drawing in a sacred union romance is about BEing, giving space to parts of you, healing your way to it. Finding yourself a new cellphone or laptop can feel just as magical as letting in a romance if the time is taken to be and feel your way there and not necessarily ‘take action’ or ‘set goals’. The same could be set for weight loss or money-earning. There is so much to be and be with as we become… as we continue to shift inside of ourselves through the inner excavation process of deep feeling that we offer in SoulFullHeart.  As we do so, the steps unfold and alignment happens in an organic, flowing, flowering way, especially in these days of ramped-up Ascension energies, where this is becoming the reality more and more easily as our energies continue to move upward.

Attracting or drawing what we most want, begins with feeling the wants, working our way to feeling what’s real about them and what deeper desires could be underneath them, helping us detach from the outcome in humble surrender. We are brilliant co-creators as arising sacred humans, work consciously and unconsciously in tandem with energies in the multi-verse inside and outside of us, and those around us who fill us up with love while we offer and BE the same to and with them. If it’s really about love underneath it all, then love is what needs to be present in our hearts, in an ever-deepening way through our healing, in order to truly reach those heights of BEing that we feel called to bring in, in whatever form or fabric that takes in our unfolding 3D-5D reality consciousness. ❤

If you wish to learn more about the SoulFullHeart process, visit http://www.soulfullheartwayoflife.com/sfhprocess for more information.

Also, THIS coming Sunday, Raphael and Jelelle Awen will be hosting a live stream on Facebook and Youtube! Check it out, starting at 11:11am CST (Mexico City).

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Kalayna Colibri is a SoulFullHeart facilitator for women around (and under) the age of 30, energy healer, indigo-crystal bridge, soul scribe, and poetess.  Visit https://www.soulfullheartwayoflife.com for more information about space holding sessions, group calls, videos, community, etc. Visit our Patreon page to offer a money donation to support our offerings at https://www.patreon.com/soulfullheart.

 

Entering The Loops Of Core Wounds

by Kalayna Colibri

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Core wounds play within us like looping lyrics to a song which you can’t remember what it’s called, but you really wish you could… it’s an unfolding mystery, wrapped in clues of layers of reaction and tears too as you make space for the parts that have been holding on to so much, for so long.

Sometimes these lyrical loops last for years and years, sometimes even lifetime within lifetime too. The same messages, the same patterns, are highlighted for us over and over again by parts within us – some that want to keep paving it over and some that want to be felt for the reasons why they’ve been holding this loop in place… and why they find it so hard to let it go.

It takes very specific life circumstances, a certain amount of love surrounding us and flowing within from us to us, for these loops to become more apparent, amplified, even to the point where you feel as if you are going completely crazy or that there really won’t ever be another side to the endless abyss of it all. This is often when we enter the darkest forest of our lives, the Dark Night, yet also the most brilliantly dawning Bright Day approaching. So many identity fragments coming apart at the seams, so much that has been buried deep within, now comes up and out, all held blessedly in Divine Love. These are the times when your closest possible relationship with the Divine can come in and be with you… when new awakenings arise, letting the purest frequencies of love in, so pure that the mind cannot track it, as it’s not something experienced in 3D life.

The bruises at the core of your heart… these are being touched now, as much as parts of you are ready to let in, even when they don’t think they’re all that ready to do so. Life finds a way to be a conduit for this healing, bringing you healing paths that could help you go into it, either by bringing the wounding more forward through taking in abuse from false or unhumbled healers, or by taking in pure love frequencies that can flow to you through the hearts of healers and leaders that are doing the same work they are leading you to do. Either way, there is an opportunity for deep empowerment and letting in of YOU, of the you that wants to birth into and through your heart, providing a balm for all that has been painful and hard within… the cycles of inner punishment, inner belittling, inner bullying, inner battles, that want to come to new conclusions or inconclusions, and a letting in of the wonder of life, the wonder of the world, the wonder of YOU.

Step by step, layer by layer, Divine invitation by Divine invitation, you can and will find your way in deeper… whether this completes for you in this life cycle or in another one to be realized. ❤


 

The work we do and offer in SoulFullHeart, reaches into these hard-to-feel and often hard-to-really-see places inside of us and inside of you. There is so much we can illuminate together through session space and other offerings as well. To learn more about the SoulFullHeart healing process and the 30 min free intro we offer, please visit: http://www.soulfullheartwayoflife.com/sessions

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Kalayna Colibri is a SoulFullHeart facilitator for women around (and under) the age of 30, energy healer, indigo-crystal bridge, soul scribe, and poetess.  Visit https://www.soulfullheartwayoflife.com for more information about space holding sessions, group calls, videos, community, etc. Visit our Patreon page to offer a money donation to support our offerings at https://www.patreon.com/soulfullheart.

The Inner Matriarch And Wounded Feminine Legacy

by Kalayna Colibri

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Messages of being a warrior, how to stand up to men… conditioning around fighting, especially for our equality, in a world that seems to want anything but. Over-expressing our sexuality in an unemotional or emotionally immature way, or choosing to deny its presence altogether… there is so much templating going on, so many living examples of how to become a matriarch – strong, unsentimental, yet very often unfeeling too. All of this is an expression of the pain and wounds inflicted by a patriarchal culture, yes, and it is all a reflection of how a part of each of us has chosen to be and act in reaction to it. As a collective, modern womanhood has successfully buried what it means to be soft and still, especially as the Inner Matriarch, who is often also the Inner Mother, typically has never been offered a sense of what healthy womanhood is or could be, and thus wants to believe that softness is weakness, the mind and body are ultimately what matter over the heart, and that femininity means building a self-image of femininity that is often depicted in ways that at the core, are actually another expression of the wounded masculine, but with a feminine face.

The Inner Matriarch forms inside of you, following your nearest feminine conditioning while growing up, passed down by your mother or another female caregiver. Even if the influence seems subtle, it is likely working inside of you in many ways, including how you express or choose not to express your sexuality, how you feel about your gender, how you feel about and relate to men and other women as well, and how you navigate many other aspects of your life too. The Inner Matriarch, in this way, is also the Inner Mother – a significant part of any woman, that carries within her the legacy of the matriarchal lineage in her birth family, often to a large degree.

It can be challenging when living out this conditioning, to even realize this is what’s happening. So many patterns are being relived by you that your mother and likely her mother before her also lived out… or, this part of you could be trying to deliberately choose to do the opposite, yet somehow, there is something still playing out that runs parallel to the matrilineal conditioning and grooming. It’s nearly impossible to feel what this legacy really has held for this part of you until you have taken the space necessary from your own birth mother in order to truly feel it. The Inner Matriarch that could be leading much of your decision-making and relating to self and others in your life as you have known it so far, will blend into the tapestry woven by the other women in influence in your birth family and sometimes also in your group of friends. This is why the advocacy for space and going inward is so invaluable.

The Inner Matriarch is often a way in which the pervasive patriarchal culture gets to live on… she has had to become the way she is in order to stand up to and survive in this environment, or so she has been so deeply conditioned to believe. It takes more than the  ‘inner strength’ of any female warrior archetype… it takes the strength of vulnerably feeling where the damage and hurt have been inflicted, bringing it back inward into your heart, and letting feeling waves in. It takes the courage to take the next step to even acknowledge this part of you, to feel and own the conditioning she has had and needed for so long, and to let in that something new could arise. The true feminine arising is a mystery wrapped in an enigma at times, with a soft touch that can also challenge and set boundaries as needed, without nastiness, pettiness or cruelty and without an all-out suppression of inner truth on the flipside of that.

There is a balance that can be lived into, where the rose of feminity can wrap around a healthy, vulnerable spine made of self-love and worth, coupled with a healing and humbled heart that now gets to lead the way… and this is what is offered as the Inner Mother and Matriarch gets felt and begins to heal from the long, long road she has been walking for so long, softening into the frequencies of a Sacred Queen. This is also what opens out the possibility of a nourishing Sacred Union romance with frequencies of heart, body and soul resonance that are nearly impossible to feel with the intensity of a wounded Inner Matriarch expressing predominantly in your life. There is much to go into and feel with her, yet it is all worth it as you begin to realize what your own version of the authentic and ever-arising feminine self is and could become as you move into more and more healing on all levels of your being. ❤

 


 

For more information about going into your own SoulFullHeart process and having space held for this part and other parts of you, please visit http://www.soulfullheartwayoflife.com/sfhprocess. We would love to serve love with you on your own journey into your deepest healing possibilities and timelines…. ❤

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Kalayna Colibri is a SoulFullHeart facilitator for women around (and under) the age of 30, energy healer, indigo-crystal bridge, soul scribe, and poetess.  Visit https://www.soulfullheartwayoflife.com for more information about space holding sessions, group calls, videos, community, etc. Visit our Patreon page to offer a money donation to support our offerings at https://www.patreon.com/soulfullheart.

How The 3D/4D/5D Self Experiences Love

by Kalayna Colibri

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Each dimension of our ‘self’ feels and experiences love in different ways. The many parts of us that have formed in order to navigate and be in life as we’ve known it so far, each have their own relationship to love. As we continue to awaken and heal, their perspectives shift and heal too, especially as the growing authentic you that holds and feels them, lets in more and more real, pure love and learns to trust it and what it wants to offer you in every sacred moment of your life.

The 3D self, says, “Love, I don’t trust you and I want to control you, though I also feel you get the better of me and we are constantly at odds. I feel like I will never get what I want, though sometimes I can’t even feel what I truly want… and am pretty afraid to find out. I don’t feel I deserve you in any form and I conspire to push you away. What I have known to be ‘love’ is not something I find very appealing or gratifying in any way.”

The 4D self, says, “Love, I want to trust you more and don’t always get how. I feel you offer more than I have ever thought or felt possible. I feel I want to serve you and be with you and flow more easily with you, though sometimes this feels so frustrating and hard too… this world I live in mostly seems not to have caught up to the reality of YOU yet and what YOU really offer all of us and beyond… I get somehow, or am starting to let in, that you are something very different than what I’ve been conditioned to think you are. I feel something different about you, though I’m not sure what that is exactly.”

The 5D ‘self’, says, “Love… this is what ‘I’ am. And as ‘I am’, ‘I’ serve love in constant, unending flow. The container is ‘me’ as the container is NOT ‘me’… the ‘me’ of before, that related to love as not my very substance, has been healing and tastes of higher dimensions where it all simply is in is-ness… this is REALity. Love is the only real. Life-giving, ever-flowing, always showing us the way inward and back out again. Love melts all ‘I’s’ into oblivion and heat-warmth, in the sweetest way, though the storms of love’s lightning flashes of where it cannot flow within must also be weathered. Love dies not, withers away not… only IS, only ever loves. ‘I’ trust love above all else. ‘I’ can hold the truth of this unendingly, without the need to transcend any doubts of this in parts of ‘me’ that remain in lower dimensional frequencies still. ‘I’ can’t always see the bigger picture, as ‘I’ also control none of it, but ‘I’ can feel it, hold it, tap into it. ‘I’ AM it, ultimately, as ‘I’ AM part of the love that makes up all aspects of it, dark and light…”

As you heal the parts that make up each of these ‘selves’ within you, the level and depth of love you are able to experience shifts in a big way. To actually feel and own that there is something very real about swinging between sometimes all three of these perspectives in a short period of time, is to humbly let in that there is more to go into, inside of yourself… and that there is no ‘perfect’ way to be with love or to be love itself, especially as we grow and learn as sacred humans arising.

To take in more about the 3D/4D/5D selves and how we hold and feel them in SoulFullHeart, you can take in this piece about how each ‘self’ relates to each area of life: http://www.soulfullheartwayoflife.com/3d4d5dselvesquestions

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Kalayna Colibri is a SoulFullHeart facilitator for women around (and under) the age of 30, energy healer, indigo-crystal bridge, soul scribe, and poetess. Visit soulfullheartwayoflife.com for more information about space holding sessions, group calls, videos, community, etc. Visit our Patreon page to offer a money donation to support our offerings at https://www.patreon.com/soulfullheart.

 

 

Letting Love Flood Within You

by Kalayna Colibri

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Sometimes it feels like the heart opens, only to close again…

The waters of love can come in like a WOOOOSH that plunges through the already opening heart door, flooding the inside of your being on many levels… soul, heart, body, astral body… it’s a feeling as if the sky above you and the ground below you is opening up and all limits parts of you have held for yourself and your life are moving, floating away… out of reach.

Then, as parts of you begin to breathe into this new reality, the oil of past pain and trauma comes up as well. Sometimes it sits in your heart-bed, feeling unwell, feeling unfit to really claim and hold and have all of this goodness. It wants to shut it down somehow, or try to. And sadly, without consciousness around parts of you and how to be with them, it can feel nearly impossible to feel as if this desire to push away is really ‘you’ or not… and so, the goodness sometimes gets shut down, and life goes back to ‘business as usual’… or tries to!

Love wants to fill your being. It wants to flood you with its waters that are meant to bring up the oil of pain that still needs to be felt and healed. It wants to bring you to new places of Divine connection and experience. It wants to experience itself through the sacred human expression of YOU that inhabits its dualism and feels its oneness in incredible opening moments too. It doesn’t care or mind if you have parts that are afraid of its power, it wants to find its way to you anyways. And so, life circumstances continue to press you, inviting you back into you, to find the parts and seek your answers deep within, to find and feel why and how love has been kept out.

What is love inviting you to feel today? How is it pressing on the sacred door of your innermost and most vigilantly protected BEing? The INvitation to feel all of this more and more, is a constant and ever-moving one… and something that can feel like it has no final ‘goal’ or ‘end’. The truth is… it doesn’t, really. The potential for healing is endless, as you are endless, and the love that flows can only ever be endless too… ❤

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Kalayna Colibri is a SoulFullHeart facilitator for women around (and under) the age of 30, energy healer, indigo-crystal bridge, soul scribe, and poetess. Visit soulfullheartwayoflife.com for more information about space holding sessions, group calls, videos, community, etc. Visit our Patreon page to offer a money donation to support our offerings at https://www.patreon.com/soulfullheart.

The Journey To New Pastures Of Growth And Love

by Kalayna Colibri

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There is a new ground wanting to ripen for you now. It’s calling your roots out of hiding, inviting you to plant them firmly in new soil. ‘New’ only in the sense of not having been lived in by you before… yet not ‘new’ at all, for there are others who have tilled it for themselves too for so long.

Out beyond everything parts of you have expected of themselves, well passed the flat expanses of ‘normal life’ that have held you in stasis, is a reality you’ve only begun to imagine for yourself… a reality where love flows and flourishes freely, pausing only to flood you and help you feel more of where it can’t quite get in. There are stuck places inside you of immaturity, of push-away towards goodness, of disbelief that love actually IS different than what parts of you have been taught it is directly and indirectly. In a pasture that you haven’t yet known, are your deepest, farthest-reaching places of healing and growth. It’s not a mental concept or construct, it can only be felt and experienced and lovingly challenged into being.

Those souls and hearts who have been in this soil before you, want to empower you beyond what parts of you have ever felt possible so far in your life. They want to empower without enabling, without caretaking what needs to be looked at, felt, deconstructed, loved UP… your soul somehow kNOWs the way, understands that it needs to lead and feels how much it wants to. It’s up to your parts, your personas, your willing heart, to feel what needs and wants to shift, what areas of life you especially need help with and illumination for, where love doesn’t seem to be flowing abundance and why love doesn’t seem to feel very nourishing, based on what you’ve lived of it so far.

It takes a lot… it takes a big soul, like yours, to say ‘yes’ to the desire deep within, that wants something different, wants transformation, wants fulfilment in the sweetest way. It takes a capacity to be with what isn’t desired, to find it within your heart to love it for what it was and what parts of you needed it for, and to move on to what awaits you next in the greener pastures of soul family, ever-expanding heart wisdom, and exponential service of love. ❤


Join SoulFullHeart’s Raphael Awen and Gabriel Heartman this Sunday at 11:11am CST for a Facebook and Youtube LIVE stream: https://www.facebook.com/events/1529926353733589

Feel into the process that I am offering to you in this writing and explore the possibility of having a free 30min intro session by visiting this page: www.soulfullheartwayoflife.com/sessions

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Kalayna Colibri is a SoulFullHeart facilitator for women around (and under) the age of 30, energy healer, indigo-crystal bridge, soul scribe, and poetess. Visit soulfullheartwayoflife.com for more information about space holding sessions, group calls, videos, community, etc. Visit our Patreon page to offer a money donation to support our offerings at https://www.patreon.com/soulfullheart.

The Desire For Love Underneath It All

by Kalayna Colibri

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Beneath the desire to predict, to plan for, to kNOw ‘what’s next’… is the desire for love.

Beneath the shadowy figures of men and women at the helm of leadership, who desire battles, who embody tremendous self-righteousness, who abuse and accuse others… is the desire for love.

Beneath the shut-outs, the push-aways, the cling-to-forevers…. is a desire for love.

Beneath your resistance to love, as expressed outwardly and inwardly, in words, in energy, in self-harm, in harm of others… is a desire for love.

And in that desire, all of the answers to questions of ‘why’ can be illuminated. And so much more can be felt, heard, seen, healed… loved.

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It often feels as if the 3D world really doesn’t want love. Some might even say outright that they don’t want love, claiming that love really isn’t the answer, or that love is only for the fortunate. Deep unworthiness to receive and let in love in the truest, deepest sense, is surfacing more and more now. There is deep unworthiness in our leaders. Deep unworthiness in fear and war-mongering. Deep unworthiness, pain, sadness, woundedness, in our patriarchal expressions as men and women, in relationships, in ourselves, at work, at home, out in the world. In all ‘fights’ we choose to instigate or be a part of in some way, we are expressing resistance to love… and where love wants to move us, what it wants to illuminate for us, what it wants to remind us that we ALL are… LOVE, embodied, ever-present.

Sometimes love is even resisted with love… it is resisted in the sense of what it wants to bring you about your wounding, which can sometimes be most easily found by going into your shadow. It is resisted by the ‘twin flame’ picture, that offers more suffering than goodness, more clinging than letting go. It is resisted in all of the ways parts of you would rather not feel. Love cannot transform or move you to new heights unless a certain facade is allowed to be cracked.

The 3D world wants love, yet is afraid of what love really is. A catalyst, a river, a cliff, a flashlight in the dark, a path less travelled or never travelled before… and an end to the depths of human suffering, starting within.

My beloveds and I offer a process of becoming reacquainted with love in a real sense of it… feeling parts of you that are resistant to truly letting it in and letting it move you in a new direction. If this appeals to you, you can read more about the process here: www.soulfullheartwayoflife.com/sessions

Also, Gabriel Heartman and Raphael Awen will be hosting a live stream on Facebook and Youtube this coming Sunday, where they will talk more about this process and way of life. You can go here for more details: https://www.facebook.com/events/1529926353733589

 

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Kalayna Colibri is a SoulFullHeart facilitator for women around (and under) the age of 30, energy healer, indigo-crystal bridge, soul scribe, and poetess. Visit soulfullheartwayoflife.com for more information about space holding sessions, group calls, videos, community, etc. Visit our Patreon page to offer a money donation to support our offerings at https://www.patreon.com/soulfullheart.