This is the first in a series of letters and poems that sends out my heart cry to my Queen. The woman that has been with me yet apart from me since I really let in my ache for a mate about a year ago. I had a part of me that had resisted deep, powerful, and transformative sacred romance with a woman that could take me to places I never felt like I could inhabit. I am still in the process of healing, and always will be, but I am more than ever ready to do so with someone who can inspire and ignite my King. These are for you, my love, wherever…whomever you may be.
Today I begin my journey to Us in earnest
Two souls in ache to mate
…to grow, expand, and deepen.
At times you feel like you live on the other side of the world
At others you are right by my side
Head resting on my shoulder
Your arm entwined with mine
Some times, the hard times
You feel like you don’t exist at all.
But I keep walking
Keep trusting that you have been with me all along.
Along busy, noisy roads
Just trying our best to keep it all together
Keeping the insanity of this world from unraveling us.
Along tranquil, serene trails
Connecting to our souls, our reason for being
Letting the magic of Nature’s divinity cleanse us
Along the inner tributaries of our hearts
The winding, curving rapids of our lust, passion, and power
The straight and gentle flow of our stillness and groundedness.
We are destined to find each other
We already exist.
Can we let that in?
Can we allow ourselves to be terrified and undeserving
While continuing to call out to each other?
Can we hold both desire and fear?
I will do so for you
For you are my reason
You are my mirror
You are my Queen
And I ache to be your King
Your strength to lean into
Your passion to wrap around
Your heart to feel you
Your arms to hold you
Your body to make love to you
Your soul to awaken with
I send you this heart cry, my love
Wherever you are
Whomever you are
Let it stand and shine like a beacon
A solar flare
We will find each other.
I will not stop
I may trip
I may struggle
But I will never stop feeling
How much I want to love you
Now matter how much it may hurt to do so.
Sequoia Heartman is an apprentice teacher at SoulFullHeart Sanctuary. Visit SoulFullHeart Way Of Life for more information about sessions.