From Nine to Ten: Completing The Cycle Of Suffering And Moving Into Trust

Moving from 9 to 10. The end of September. The beginning of October. I felt something significant move into my body yesterday. After my past 9 year, 9 month, 9 day cycle had completed with quite a bang through the body illness, it filled with a renewed sense of being. Of purpose. Of clarity and above all…Trust. I was filled with 10. It is like I have been a 9 for so long that I can’t even remember anything else. Always on the edge of completion but never completing. Suffering over the suffering of feeling out of reach of this new world of 10. 

When I look it up, I read the characteristics as 

*Independence

*Infinite potential

*Wholeness

*Self-determination

*Exploration

That all seems to align perfectly with what is moving through me. Now these are not absolute. I still feel parts of me that have doubt, anxiety, and fear but they feel less ‘up front’ then they used to be. My Service to Other has grown over my Service to Self. A tipping point has occurred and I feel the Divine gracefully guiding me and supporting me in my next steps as a healer and a leader. 

I needed this last round of Dark Night to get me here. It may not be my last but it is getting awfully damn close. The Dark Mother has always been a gift to me, even though parts of me just couldn’t see it that way until they could. 

I feel many of us are in this phase of moving from 9 to 10. Getting swept up in the brevity of its chaos and intensity. I have traversed these waters for a reason. Not to just move on but to assist others as well to the other side that want the support and guidance. I feel clear about that as the Sun shines behind me. 

How that service and support manifests is up to the Divine but I am Here. I am continuing to love myself and to offer Love to others in any way that it is meant to land, whether by my word or through space-holding. I am excited to see what unfolds for myself, you, and the world at large as we move into this new phase of our INvolution. 

Love to you all that have been with me on this journey. Thank you for your witness and love. I offer it back to you in spades.

*****

Gabriel Heartman is an emoto-spiritual men’s and women’s facilitator, energy healer, writer, poet, and heartist with the SoulFullHeart Way of Life.  Visit https://www.soulfullheartwayoflife.com for more information about space holding sessions, group calls, videos, community, etc. 

Visit our website to offer a money donation to support our offerings at https://www.soulfullheartwayoflife/donations.

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Choosing To Forget

By Raphael Awen

You’ve chosen to forget.

The desire, the rate and pace, the content of what and how you remember is also a choice.

A dynamic and powerful part of you has been assigned to hold this tension of what needs to remain in the forgotten category and what is safe and timely to be remembered. We could call this part of you, your Gatekeeper, the guardian of the necessary veil who enabled and afforded you to inhabit this desired third dimensional school without imploding.

It’s been a bit of a family joke for those that know me to have a little fun with my forgetfulness around movies. I’ve tended strongly to forget titles, story lines, and often only recall a movie I’m watching for the second time part way into the movie. It’s not all movies as some story lines made profound impacts and memories. Other movies, however, who people around me found interesting enough, I often even fell asleep to while watching.

I asked my Gatekeeper whose name is Rhodes about this, this morning and immediately my awareness expanded out that this forgetfulness of story has directly to do with the strength of the veil that I chose and needed this life. Even with Rhodes himself along with stories of my Metasoul aspects and their timelines, I’ve had trouble recalling some time following after having deep and profound processes of remembering. It would simply get swallowed back up into a sea of a kind of a sea of forgetfulness.

Rhodes communicated today that the strength of other timelines stories needed to have sufficient veil in order that the purpose of this timeline be protected. As I’m awakening, however, this movie amnesia, whether it’s about movies or about my soul history, or even this life history, is making other parts of me feel self conscious. They want to get on with remembering. Remembering, they feel is the answer to what is ached for, and the answer to where parts of me feel, I and they still experience suffering.

I’m told that forgetting is a kind of suffering, a burden to bear, if you will, that we all chose, collectively and individually as a service to the goals and desires of love. Forgetting is not static however. Forgetting is for the purpose of remembering. We hid our own Easter eggs and we wrapped our own Christmas presents. We forgot in order to remember.

I’m told that remembering is ’to be returned to being a member’, after surrendering to a kind of dismemberment from love. The forgetting had its own pains as does remembering, like blood returning to a limb that fell asleep.

I’m told that the whole purpose of forgetting and remembering was to expand love from its original perfect/imperfect state. Love itself wanted to be noticed and to be revered. It birthed duality as a place to get noticed, seen and appreciated.

Getting to know and feel this magical part of you who’s been your personal Gatekeeper is now your opportunity to negotiate the rate and pace and content of your awakening as you lovingly guide yourself and other parts of yourself through this epic journey.

Story lines from other timelines in your Metasoul await you to be felt and seen and transmuted into love. Karma itself also wants to be transmuted from the expectation of pain to the expectation of bounty and love.

Raphael Awen is co-creator, teacher, and facilitator of the SoulFullHeart Way Of Life.  Visit soulfullheartwayoflife.com for more information about sessions, events, videos, etc. Visit our donations page to offer a monthly or one time money donation to support our offerings.

Death & Rebirth Cycle Q&A Live Stream and Guided Meditation

In this live stream which aired on Facebook on April 3, 2019, SoulFullHeart Teachers/Facilitators, Jelelle Awen and Gabriel Solais, offer a space for digestion of the March Ascension energies and the process of death/rebirth that they are inviting you into. They also offer an update to what the April energies feel like.

Part way through the video, they lead a guided meditation to connect with the ‘death doula’ energy inside of you that allows for the death process for parts of you that need it… and the midwife that can birth the higher-dimensional timeline/reality into the NEW.

******

For information about a bridging session with a SoulFullHeart Facilitator and ongoing individual and group sessions, visit

http://www.soulfullheartwayoflife.com/sessions

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Honoring The Courage To Feel: A Gatekeeper’s Journey

Tender tears flow. This is the moment of feeling. Healing. Letting go and letting in. In recent weeks I have been connecting with another layer of my defenses, my protection, in the form of what we call the Gatekeeper. They are the holders and guardians of our soul story and soul pain. I have had several incarnations in my healing process and this latest one has been one that has been like the Wizard of my Oz. He was found in deep resistance to feminine intuition and guidance. It was a subtle energy that was very much closely connected to my waking consciousness. A cognitive dissonance arose in me and I began to feel a bit lost in what was me and what wasn’t.

As I began to commune with this energy more and receive space-holding from Jelelle and reflection from my beloved Kalayna, I could begin to feel a conscious separation that is all part of this work of differentiation. The energy became less unknown and more knowable. More willing to be seen and connected with. I could feel how this aspect of me has been so closely entwined with me most of my life and came out in bits and pieces over the course of my healing.

But this has felt core to me. The themes he has shared with me have been themes that have pervaded my consciousness my whole life. Guilt, shame, cowardice, judgment, rejection, fear, doubt, hopelessness, and even rage. Our Gatekeepers are like sponges that hold this vast arena of our soul in a what appears as a finite container of energy. This provides a huge feeling of burden and responsibility. I have equated it to the image of Atlas in past writings.

He was originally found in a large cavernous space under my castle as a dragon protecting my inner treasure of heart and soul. But this was mostly a projection of defense he has since shown himself to be more human in form as the lifetimes on this planet would have him, and me, accustomed to. We have been in contact daily but he has been a bit elusive due to his own distrust and acclimation in being seen. Today he let me in a bit more to feel the deeper pain of creating a wall to his angelic home.

From his words, he felt how much he had fused to this dimension and assumed the role of responsibility of what happened to my soul, rather than the intended choice of being a guide. The experiences of myriad timelines had shuddered his heart through the volatility of human pain and emotion. He chose a life of hiding and self-sequestering that only acted as a barrier to receive the Love from whence he came. I was guided to play some piano music that has always brought this feeling of missing home into my heart. As I played it, the tears came and the heart opened even if just slightly.

He could feel the waves of love coming from “beyond” yet are very much right here, right now. It has been hard for him to let that in as it means to feel the pain of putting up the walls in the first place. So the tears are bittersweet, but tears nonetheless. They are the process of Love finding the pain and giving it the healing that it wants and needs in order to move on and move up to new frequencies and timelines that offer more ease and joy and less heaviness and difficulty.

It wasn’t a full dam break but a good start to begin to shift something so profoundly core in my life. In my quest for wholeness, self-love, and service of love. The image that I chose below is one that represents my Gatekeeper and his lonely search for Love even when he has resisted it so. It looked as far away as the stars but forgetting is had always been there right there under his feet and in his heart. This is my honoring of him and his courage to keep marching on.

*****

Gabriel Heartman is an emoto-spiritual men’s and women’s facilitator, energy healer, writer, poet, and heartist with the SoulFullHeart Way of Life.  Visit https://www.soulfullheartwayoflife.com for more information about space holding sessions, group calls, videos, community, etc.

Visit our website to offer a money donation to support our offerings at https://www.soulfullheartwayoflife/donations.

Feeling The Existential Part Of You To Heal Beyond Medication

I felt to share a response I gave to someone around the use of medication to alleviate deep depression and even thoughts of suicide. There is a lot that has been done to help many with this crippling and tragic dynamic inside, yet it is a way to get on rather than truly go IN and get to the deep roots of this very existential situation. I honor what medication has meant to those that have needed it, I had my own. If the desire is there to be curious and courageous then that is the first step in living a life of authentic feeling and joy:

“You are tapping into some deep existential territory. In my personal opinion, psychology has a hard time grappling with this existential quandary, so drugs are prescribed as a runaround. I don’t feel it as evil per se, just the only way to provide relief and a sense of control. But ultimately we need to reconcile this within ourselves so that we can feel what is the root in our souls around this.

The particular story is different for everyone, and we all have our own bone to pick with God. A fear, a rejection, persecution, abandonment, etc. We are to feel what our relationship is to this feeling if we want to ‘get back to God’, so to speak. If we truly believe or even want to believe that God is Love and that It/He/She exists in all things and has never abandoned us, then there is a story there. A reason for this feeling of being tried, tested, or played with. It is up to us to ask the questions, hold the space, and go into the murky territory that is this sacredly difficult place.

I believe that true awakening is a challenge but not one that we are in alone or outside of God’s Love. I feel this burden of proof from God needed by a part of you. Feeling our Higher Self and tapping into its own knowingness is what can bring us the much-needed space to go into this journey if we are willing and ready.”

Gabriel Heartman
soulfullheartwayoflife.com/bridging-session

Photo by Zoltan Tasi on Unsplash

*****

Gabriel Heartman is an emoto-spiritual men’s and women’s facilitator, energy healer, writer, poet, and heartist with the SoulFullHeart Way of Life.  Visit https://www.soulfullheartwayoflife.com for more information about space holding sessions, group calls, videos, community, etc.

Visit our website to offer a money donation to support our offerings at https://www.soulfullheartwayoflife/donations.

New Babies Announcement: SoulFullHeart FREE, PREP and DEEP

By Raphael Awen

We’re having brand new babies and these babies are going to take a beloved community to raise them!

We are launching our new PREP program this week and this has necessitated a transformation and naming of our other two previously nameless babies that we’ve had up till now, as FREE and DEEP.

Our new program offerings are now called, FREE, PREP and DEEP.

We’re so excited we can hardly stand it!

FREE is free, a ton of fresh-baked goodies that we send out almost every day through a host of channels, creating virtual cafes and libraries for you to find your way in. In FREE, you can acclimate to and take in the signature SoulFullHeart energies that we feel you can’t find anywhere else. You can create a lot of movement and shifts in your life just by taking in these free offerings and allowing them to move through you and your view of life and relationships. FREE is actually at the heart of what we offer and we put so much into it, because we want to, and because it’s our funnest fun.

PREP is the next level of significant engagement. For $77 USD minimum donation per month, you can become a PREP member. In PREP, you will receive three weekly SoulFullHeart Process program assignments each month tailored to getting to know and feel aspects of yourself in alignment with your Ascension journey. There are also three facilitated and recorded group calls every month that you can join in live or take in afterwards, at your leisure, with other PREP and DEEP members, to have space to process what you are digesting. Another BIG support structure is the SoulFullHeart Circle, a members-only private forum to share your assignments, digestions, and form new relationships based in the SoulFullHeart way of life. With this expanded engagement of your intentionality along with the weekly process assignments, the group calls, and the Circle, you will be able to make much deeper and grounded life changes that your heart and soul have been wanting to make, with all of that based in getting to know and feel parts of yourself, rather than a self-help regimen overlay of what you ‘should’ do.

In PREP, for an additional minimum donation of $55 USD, you can also schedule a 75 to 90 minute personal session with one of the SoulFullHeart facilitators as you feel the need for specific digestions.

PREP is a self-guided program where you have a ton of resources to choose from that you can engage with at your own pace and allow life to flow with you and your discoveries and shifts.

The details for PREP along with a ‘Buy Now’ button can be found here. If you are ready, you can sign up immediately. All you need to do is make the minimum donation (or more) and we’ll send you our welcome letter and get you oriented. No commitment beyond the month is required.

Then comes DEEP for a minimum monthly donation of $222 USD a month. You can dive in here if you want to, but you may not want to. Depends. We’ll meet with you first to discuss what you are looking for and how we and the DEEP program could serve you. DEEP includes all of the PREP program, as well as the FREE program, which form the foundations for the DEEP program.

What DEEP offers beyond this foundation is going through the same weekly assignments that are offered in PREP, but along with having a recurring weekly personal session space with one of the program facilitators (Gabriel, Kalayna or Raphael, with Jelelle as a senior facilitator working with women who have completed a minimum of three months in DEEP) too. This is all-in for a minimum donation of $222 USD per month.

As you are using all of the tools and means to support your process of getting to discover, know and love parts of yourself, the sessions provide a space for these parts to come to life. They will feel the light and love of a new day, as you are also templated and guided to be this new, loving, authentic self, and curious parent energy to these parts of yourself. Our wounding occured in a feeling space while in relationship and so does our healing, one beloved part at a time. If you know already that you want to go into DEEP, we want to meet with you in a Program Advisory Session led by myself (Raphael) to get you oriented and grounded. If I really feel you would be better served by PREP, we will talk about that together as well. We ask for a minimum donation of $33 USD for this one hour Program Advisory Session. Go here if you’d like to purchase that and I will be in touch to set that up with you.

The details for DEEP can be found here. Information about the brand NEW SoulFullHeart Process can be found here.

We believe this stuff down to our core. We walk what we talk and we live it everyday. Serving it to others is an extension of that. We believe with all of our hearts that you will not find anything like it anywhere. We’ve looked high and low. That’s a bold claim, I know, but how is it that any lesser claim could be enough for you?

If this resonates for you, please join us and become a part of the community that it’s going to take for the raising of these new babies – SoulFullHeart FREE, PREP and DEEP.

We will be more than delighted for each and every one of you that desire to be a part of this and what the road ahead calls us, all together, to show up for.

In Heart,

Raphael Awen, on behalf of all of us here in SoulFullHeart.
Raphael Awen is co-creator, teacher, and facilitator of the SoulFullHeart Way Of Life. Visit www.soulfullheartwayoflife.com for more information about Weekly Sessions, Live Streams, Videos, and Community.

Return LOVE in money form: https://www.paypal.me/supportsoulfullheart or visit our Patreon page to become a monthly supporter: https://www.patreon.com/soulfullheart.

Your Demons Are Your Angels Unheard – Day 19: 33 Days Metamorphosis W/Jelelle Awen & Gabriel Heartman (Video)

By Jelelle Awen

In today’s video, Day 19 of this 33 Day Metamorphosis series, SoulFullHeart Facilitator Gabriel Heartman joins me to read from and talk about a writing and topic that feels so relevant and timely to the ongoing collective and personal ascension process.

This is an excerpt from his writing: “In this moment I feel you.  I feel you because I have been you.  There are voices, or intense energies, that just don’t seem to leave you alone. They permeate your BEing, making themselves at home with your mental body and wreaking havoc with your emotional body. You are becoming aware of so much around you. Being as sensitive as you are you pick up on it and it just finds its way INside. Sticking to the stuck places that have yet to be felt and unravel. It can be literally overwhelming. You may be even experiencing intense anxiety over what is going on inside. Wondering how you will ever get any peace of ¨mind¨. It is a daily life of maintaining your sanity in what feels like an insane world.

The thinning of the veil is elucidating your most hidden places. The ones you thought you had under control or weren’t even aware of. The contentedness is slowly losing its hold on your emotional reality. What I want to offer here is that there is a life-line. It is to actually go INsane. Which in this way means to go “into the healthy”. In our fear-sided consciousness, we have turned away from going into the deep emotional as the Holy Grail of our greatest gift to ourselves.

These energies have been called our inner Demons. They have felt like a haunting to some. An intense barrage of thought and emotion that have medicated by all sorts of prescriptions, whether drugs, or sex, or anything else that has aided as a distraction. Some may just be living with it trying to “get by” as best they can. I want to give a voice to these “demons”, for they are actually your unheard and unfelt angels. They have a message to deliver to you and you just haven’t had the means to be able to actually hear without being overwhelmed.”

Here is a link to read Gabriel’s entire writing: https://soulfullheartblog.com/2017/05/01/your-demons-are-angels-unheard/

Gabriel and I then talk about going into deeper feeling states or ‘shadow’ sides of depression, pain, anxiety, and those called our ‘inner demons’. We feel a connection with these energies as parts of ourselves and forming a relationship ‘with’ them is what allows these energies to heal, integrate, and share their gifts. Gabriel shares from his personal, many year process to be with these parts of himself and his process through spaceholding support with me and my mate Raphael.

We talk about how if you don’t have a means to have a relationship with these energies and parts, then you will seek anything to try to cope, divert, and relieve the feelings – such as through alcohol, drugs, sex, habits, suffering loops, even through spiritual practices, etc.

There is more to read here about the Metasoul and parts process: http://www.soulfullheartwayoflife.com/parts
About the gatekeeper: http://www.soulfullheartwayoflife.com/gatekeepers

Here is a playlist of my guided meditations:https://www.youtube.com/playlist…

Thank you for joining me on this nineteenth day of 33….as we move into Metamorphosis energies together…..one beloved part of us at a time!

Go here to view the playlist listing all of the videos:https://www.youtube.com/watch…

You are invited to share comments on your experiences connected to this series and questions too on facebook, the blog athttps://soulfullheartblog.com, and on the SFH Experience Youtube channel for which I will respond and offer reflections/guidance.

 

Donations are so appreciated and received with gratitude as an energy exchange in the offering of this series for free through paypal: soulfullheartwayoflife.com/donations or the SoulFullHeart Patreon Page: https://www.patreon.com/soulfullheart

~

 

Jelelle Awen is Co-creator/Facilitator/Teacher of the SoulFullHeart Way Of Life. She is a Soul Scribe and author of three books about Ascension, Divine Feminine and Masculine, emotional body integration through parts work, quantum healing through Metasoul Aspect connection, sacred union, light body transformation, and much more!

Visit soulfullheartwayoflife.com for more information about space holding sessions and a free intro session, group calls, videos, etc. Visit our patreon page to offer a monthly or one time money donation to support our offerings at https://www.patreon.com/soulfullheart.

Embrace Your Humanity As You Embody Your Divinity

19

Picture by Christian Schloe

“Your willingness to fully embrace your humanity is your ability to fully embody your divinity”

As human beings we are connected so viscerally to our feelings. In this dimension we experience a wide range of them that bring us to the height of ecstacy, and to the depths of despair and terror. There is a fullness of experience that lies in between. It is why we came here. To fully embrace all that our human-ness has to offer. We needed as a consciousness to forget our nature in order to experience it all. We came to learn and live.

There was always an inherent risk in this, but the fail-safe has been the reality that we have been and always are held in Love, no matter where our emotive winds blow us. The key to this fail-safe is our willingness to feel it all. To be willing to go into the depth of our human experience and feel ALL that is has accumulated is what leads us the doorstep of our divinity.

We can access these high divine frequencies. They are what holds the exploration into the shadowlands of our wounds and darkness. These lower frequencies are our Earthling or 3D human selves. They are the anchors that keep us from truly and significantly embodying our more Gaian or 5D Sacred Human Self.  These denser energies make themselves evident in their recurring nature and are messages that we have more healing to do. They are the beauty and tenderness of the Inner Teenager, the unfelt pains of the Inner Punisher, and the heirloom legacy of our Inner Mother and Father.

Your willingness to fully embrace your emotional body is negotiation with the part of you that is very protective of it. It is through a conscious relationship to your internal defence that you can begin feel, heal, and integrate all that has been waiting for you. The metasoul aspects that hold deep soul pain and soul gifts too.  As you do, more room is made inside you to bring in more permanently the higher states of your soul consciousness and Christ Heart. This what I imagine is the transformation from carbon to crystal.

It is through feeling and holding all the parts of you that are in curiosity, in pain, and in fear that leads to the greater purpose of embodying all the magic and love that you ARE and meant to BE. You are opening the doors to your multidimensional angelic YOU. You are living into your highest expression of your sacred masculine and feminine in balance and in union. You have remembered your wings and it is time to fly.

Gabriel Heartman is an emoto-spiritual men’s and women’s facilitator, energy healer, writer, poet, and heartist with the SoulFullHeart Way of Life.  Visit https://www.soulfullheartwayoflife.com for more information about space holding sessions, group calls, videos, community, etc.

Visit our patreon page to offer a money donation to support our offerings at https://www.patreon.com/soulfullheart.

3D Protector And 4D Gatekeeper – Day 12: 33 Days Metamorphosis W/Jelelle Awen & Kalayna Colibri (Video)

By Jelelle Awen

In today’s video, Day 12 of this 33 Day Metamorphosis series, SoulFullHeart Facilitator Kalayna Colibri joins me to talk about the SoulFullHeart process and how it has been for her to navigate for the last six years, especially as someone who is 30. Kalayna works with women under 30 in SoulFullHeart sessions and shares about some things she has seen in that work in terms of their pain and challenges. We discuss the feelings of abandonment and not belonging in 3D, such as not wanting a career/family/mortgage that are common to her generation.

Kalayna also shares about her process working with her Protector in different forms, names, and energies over the years that were quite masculine in the beginning of her process. This part has eventually turned into the 4D Gatekeeper named Angelica that is more feminine. Work with the Protector reveals the Inner Child which then uncovers the Star Seed Child, which is the wonder being ‘from the stars’ energy inside of us all. More about these parts here: http://www.soulfullheartwayoflife.com/parts
 
The Gatekeeper is a multidimensional aspect of our soul that is guarding and protecting access to our remembrance and access to our other timelines/lifetimes. Access to your Metasoul becomes more fluid as you work with the Gatekeeper. This is the article I mention in the video about Gatekeepers, which are more about protecting your Metasoul/other lifetime aspects and your soul than connected to 3D life concerns: http://www.soulfullheartwayoflife.com/gatekeepers
 
To see more videos with Kalayna, along with SoulFullHeart Gabriel, talking about the seven areas of life we address in SoulFullHeart is here: https://www.youtube.com/playlist?list=PLNmrHdaQSAvInP1AB__TzXykZythfad8i
 
Thank you for joining us on this twelve day of 33….as we move into Metamorphosis energies together…..one beloved part of us at a time!
 
Go here to view the playlist listing all of the videos: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=S7Pj3hPLsv0&list=PLNmrHdaQSAvIkhNtLWKs-osheX1SoBFpI
 
You are invited to share comments on your experiences connected to this series and questions too on facebook, the blog at https://soulfullheartblog.com, and on the SFH Experience Youtube channel for which I will respond and offer reflections/guidance.

~

 

Jelelle Awen is Co-creator/Facilitator/Teacher of the SoulFullHeart Way Of Life. She is a Soul Scribe and author of three books about Ascension, Divine Feminine and Masculine, emotional body integration through parts work, quantum healing through Metasoul Aspect connection, sacred union, light body transformation, and much more!

Visit soulfullheartwayoflife.com for more information about space holding sessions and a free intro session, group calls, videos, etc. Visit our patreon page to offer a monthly or one time money donation to support our offerings at https://www.patreon.com/soulfullheart.

Moving From Anxiety To Trust And Surrender

By Jelelle Awen

movingintotrust
What seems to be UP for healing in this now is the distrust that LIVES in parts of us that really have very little reason to trust life, us, others in relationships, or the Divine. This distrust expresses as anxiety, sometimes so acute as to make it difficult to even BE in life and be social with others. Definitely making it challenging to let in and receive love.
 
Feeling this kind of anxiety is not a ‘disorder’, not something to be medicated with the latest pharma drugs. (same with depression, what is labelled as ‘bipolar’, etc. etc.) This distrust is rooted in the emotional body, the 3D Self aspects such as the Protector who HAD to come in when you were born here and create a shield to protect you from the harsh energies around and surrounding you. This protection was formed, to some degree, out of a distrust that you would actually be safe in 3D if you remained vulnerable, unexposed, innocent, pure…which is highly likely that you wouldn’t have been. This protection couldn’t prevent ALL harm from happening as your soul signed up to grow and to learn. The Protector can feel so guilty about this, like he/she failed you and the precious ones inside you that it feels like it was supposed to protect from all harm. The distrust can come from this place of guilt too. More about the Protector here: soulfullheartwayoflife.com/parts
 
Distrust also stems from existential, soul roots too. Can be deep in the Metasoul timelines and lifetimes where betrayal and persecution and backstabbing are so common. You have Metasoul Aspects that are living these scenarios out in the now (not past at all, not ancient at all.) The energetic karma trauma created from the playouts of this distrust can run deep. It can greatly impact your romantic relationships especially as wounded masculine expressions create ‘no go’ zones related to intimacy, sexuality, and sacred union.
 
The aspect of your Metasoul that is in charge with guarding and keeping the veils in place until there is enough YOU there to handle the remembering is what we call the Gatekeeper. This Metasoul Aspect often has deep layers of distrust in the Divine especially, who it feels has left it, abandoned it, and given it a near impossible mission to protect you (and the other Metasoul aspects) in difficult densities. Even if you feel a trust in the Divine, this Aspect may not at all, which can be interesting to feel how this polarity lives inside. More about the Gatekeeper here: soulfullheartwayoflife.com/gatekeepers
 
The Divine Feminine is here to hold space for these masculine aspects to begin to rest. To infuse you with feminine compassion for these energies and what they have so vigilantly DONE and BEEN for you. Inner negotiation opens up as you become ambassador to all these aspects of yourself, supported by the Divine Feminine and Divine Masculine too. You become loving witness to their distrust, understanding and feeling the reasons why.
 
Distrust can be moved to trust with love and by love. What previously felt like resistance and fear moves into acceptance and surrender. What was before shut down, now opens UP to receive LOTS more love!
~

Jelelle Awen is Co-creator/Facilitator/Teacher of the SoulFullHeart Way Of Life. She is a Soul Scribe and author of three books about Ascension, Divine Feminine and Masculine, emotional body integration through parts work, quantum healing through Metasoul Aspect connection, sacred union, light body transformation, and much more! 

Visit soulfullheartwayoflife.com for more information about space holding sessions and a free intro session, group calls, videos, etc. Visit our patreon page to offer a monthly or one time money donation to support our offerings at https://www.patreon.com/soulfullheart.