Into The Trauma, And Beyond!

By Raianna Shai

Much of spirituality and emotional healing is based on the healing of trauma. From this life, other lifetimes, and with galactic connections. This is probably some of the most important work we do in healing our wounding and growing closer to our essence. My recent process, however, has helped me realize that there IS healing that exists beyond the trauma.

In my most recent session I connected with both my inner protector and a new gatekeeper. My inner protector is the part of me that helps get me through daily life. He is the one that can hold very 3D and physical/mental tasks. My gatekeeper, on the other hand, is the guide I can lean into when it comes to opening out my soul connections and gifts.

As I felt my protector first, he was overwhelmed and trying so hard to deepen my process and make it more meaningful. But deepening my healing isn’t his responsibility. I haven’t signed up for much trauma this life and the metasoul healing I’ve done so far has healed almost all of what I have signed up for. So this part’s job has shifted massively from protecting to resting and trusting.

This new gatekeeper, who I am calling Damien, is a much higher frequency and has the key to unlocking the rest of my soul that goes beyond the trauma. He can show me the gifts, the positive experiences, the magical and deep journeys that allow for more love and cohesion between all aspects of myself.

Going through this process has helped me realize that we don’t just have to be here for trauma healing. We can go beyond – deeper into who we want to be and what we want to build for ourselves. We can grow closer and closer to essence until maybe we are even done coming back as human.

In order to get to this place we must trudge through muddy waters, deconstruct all that we have believed to be true about ourselves, love who are parts once were and dream about who we want to be. We must find the worth, do the work and stay in the room with the darkest and most difficult parts of us. But each ounce of love we take in, each connection to the Divine and each step towards forgiveness brings us through our trauma and into the “beyond”.

Beyond self consciousness, beyond fear, beyond anger, beyond anxiety and depression, even beyond much self awareness at all. The “beyond” to me is pure love, essence, passion and service.

*****

Raianna Shai is a SoulFullHeart facilitant and social media maven for SoulFullHeart Healing, a healing process and paradigm offering New Gaia Ascension frequencies to transmute trauma into love on emotional/spiritual/physical levels. For more information about free intro calls and 1:1 individual sessions with SoulFullHeart Facilitators, virtual group transmissions, four day gatherings in Victoria, BC, writings/books, and videos, visit soulfullheartwayoflife.com.

 

Authentic Masculinity & The Return To King

Authenticity and masculinity.

These are two roads that are intersecting for me recently. They are actually running parallel seeking to become one. As my inner work continues with my own personal sessions, I am finding this nexus of authentic, masculine leadership to be my next going on place. It reverberates with a lot of questions and curiosities.

Who is this authentic masculine within?
When has it showed up and when has it not?

These are self-loving questions and not a judgement as to when it hasn’t.

As a man that has realized his own inner feminine leanings, this is sacred ground. I have been feeling my inner feminine, Geneveive, becoming more comfortable in my heart as an integral part of who I am as a man. With this relaxing, the suppressed masculine within is coming to the surface to find His authentic place on the throne next to her.

As with any suppressed masculine, it comes with an edgy, maybe even defensive, energy, as it has not really had much practice being out in the world. As that energy comes into me I feel this a part of me. His name is Sarge (for Sergeant). As repressed masculine, he came to me as an inner punisher. Yelling and judging to be heard. That was a deep process of feeling him and his vulnerabilities and needs.

What I felt recently in my session with Jelelle, was how this authentic masculine energy had been neutralized in protection against my father’s rage and the perception of my mother’s fragility. A dynamic that stunted this initiation into the world. In some ways, at the age of 48, I feel like this is the beginning of this initiation. I had to be with some reaction to that only to feel how this is the way it has just played itself out.

In this initiation, I am dropping this old relationship to Woman (via Mom) and Man (via Dad) to feel what my authentic masculine leadership needs/wants as well as its effect on my feminine and younger parts. It is a process of moving from Knight to King on the chessboard of growth. I feel the kings of my Metasoul eager to guide me and activate me on this journey.

In the past this felt like a scared place, but now it feels sacred. It feels natural and ripe. With is comes uncertainty and unpredictability, but that feels alive to this arising masculine. It is the wounded masculine that seeks order and the known. The true King has the Order within and brings that energy to all that is around Him. I feel Divine Father in this moment than I ever have.

It is this Return to King that I want to make transparent to all the men that feel this in their hearts and souls. It is from this place that I seek to serve and lead. Amen.

*****

Gabriel Heartman is an emoto-spiritual men’s and women’s facilitator, energy healer, writer, poet, and heartist with the SoulFullHeart Way of Life.  Visit https://www.soulfullheartwayoflife.com for more information about space holding sessions, group calls, videos, community, etc.

Finding Real Love When You Come Undone

Our hearts and souls are entangled. Of course they are. We are One. But I can feel deeply, and receive guidance about the nature of our entanglement. We are seeking how to authentically love ourselves as the Divine loves Itself. We have chosen Entanglement to work so many edges and polarities of the human and celestial experience.

First you come to an awareness of entanglement either with a family member, a lover, a mate, a belief system, a conditioning, an addiction, your ego, and the plethora of psychic energies and entities that exist in this multiverse. It is mind blowing the number of entanglements we have chosen to enter into in order to fully understand the nature and embodied experience of Love.

When seen from this place, the part of you that may punish you for getting into these entanglements can start to be felt for what is truly wanting and needing to be felt. It is the fear of becoming Undone. Unseen, Unloved.

Parts of us have become so accustomed to the energy of the entanglement. It actually feels like home to them. It is known and knowable even if it isn’t healthy or if it is limiting. These parts can go on ad infinitum until one day You decide You can’t. Then the unraveling begins.

The unraveling can be a scary place to be. However, it is the most real place and the most alive. In the unraveling you are held. The degree of that truth is really up to you. It does not have to be some traumatic event that takes you into an intense Dark Night experience. It can actually be held as a birth. A process over time.

The Dark Night experience is a fusion to the part/parts of you that feel separation, void, and abandonment. This is very real to them and yet can also be mid-wifed into a new reality by the You that was never entangled in the first place. Feeling that You arises simultaneously from the disentanglement. It is a sacred paradox. Your Phoenix rising.

As you allow yourself to become Undone, with love, compassion, space, and time, a magical alchemy happens from within. You feel the parts of you that have been in hiding, scared, in trauma, as well as the protected parts that are still in joy, in magic, and in love because they were sequestered and guarded by your Inner Proctector. This process of disentanglement does not start without them. Feeling their fears and concerns first and having a relationship with them is what greases those wheels.

I feel myself disentangling from others this life and other lives as well. It is an ongoing process until it isn’t anymore. No judgement, just understanding, remorse, responsibility, and compassion. Loss, grief, and fear eventually transmute into trust, self-love, and clarity. Next stop is flow, joy, and the blissful mystery. Sometimes you need help, other times you just need You.

*****

Photo by Heather Evans Smith
http://www.heatherevanssmith.com/

Gabriel Heartman is an emoto-spiritual men’s and women’s facilitator, energy healer, writer, poet, and heartist with the SoulFullHeart Way of Life.  Visit https://www.soulfullheartwayoflife.com for more information about space holding sessions, group calls, videos, community, etc.

Reclaiming Authority & The Lovelight Within

Your light can never be taken. It can only be given in order to be reclaimed or shared. You have always had authority.

The more I feel and reflect on my personal healing journey and those that I have served, there is something that keeps coming to me from up ‘above’ or deep within. It is this notion that we are ultimately the creators of our reality and experiences. This can be accepted to a large degree, but there are times when it feels untrue when we are confronting some of the deeper layers of wounding both this life and others.

However, before we can really let that in, one must have the permission to feel the part that felt victimized and traumatized, as well as the part that feels rage, guilt, and shame for ever letting such traumatic circumstances happen in the first place. That must be given space in the heart but not tenure. Otherwise, it is a cycle that will continue to perpetuate itself upon itself. A negative feedback loop in a way.

I am always in awe of any of us that have come to this realization after all that we have been through. No matter how you classify the trauma, you are the beacon of a brighter day for humanity. You have a Protector that has been vigilant in the face of great challenge and pain. They have kept the light hidden but never extinguished. Even the pain proves that. That pain is the light coming through. It has always been there for you ARE Light. You ARE Love. And parts of you may not believe that for it does mean that the pain does need a landing pad.

When that Lovelight begins to be reclaimed through this feeling process, it becomes your power again. It becomes your sovereignty even though it never left. It is just this time it won’t be used to highlight the Shadow, but to be cultivated and shared with gratitude, humility, and joy. It is at that moment when you may realize the reason why your soul took the path it did. It appears as the soil from which you were reborn…again.

******

Gabriel Heartman is an emoto-spiritual men’s and women’s facilitator, energy healer, writer, poet, and heartist with the SoulFullHeart Way of Life.  Visit https://www.soulfullheartwayoflife.com for more information about space holding sessions, group calls, videos, community, etc.

Gatekeepers, Protectors, and Teenagers, Oh My!

I just got off my first Intro Call with a very multidimensional individual who has had deep feelings of being trapped or stuck in their current situation. They are currently assisting a parent with life circumstances. This can be very challenging if there is an emotional and spiritual dissonance, and a deep empathic sensitivity.

One of the things that I felt was the presence of a Gatekeeper who is very active and present in our awakening whenever they occur. For some, this can mean a widened and deepened view of what is occurring beyond our 5-sense reality. We can be overwhelmed by the power of this sight and felt reality. It is a reflection of how big we really are.

But it can also come with a hefty price tag if/when darker energies make their way into the lightness of being. They are like moths drawn to the flame. This can be all part of a larger karmic playout that can be very difficult to integrate in our human, earthly bodies.

The Gatekeeper can go into protection mode and shut is all down, or severely limit it. This can be really hard to deal with and is why they feel like they are “trapped in these denser frequencies”. That is because they are. They are not meant to do work here in this dimension. They are a 4D energy that is meant to be accessed and related to. They are not meant to do human work. You are.

This energy can also extend itself to our more ‘this life’ parts such as the Inner Child and/or Inner Teenager. They can get very activated through fear and frustration as to what to do with it all. This is where taking some time and space to feel all of these energies through helps to sort out what to address, heal, and integrate.

While this initially seems a bit complicated and overwhelming it is just a map of your inner emotospiritual geography that we get to explore together to unravel the mysteries and heal the cycles of trauma and unworth that lead to self-love, self-awareness, and service to others.

Right now it may feel like a lot, and it is, but with consistency and compassion, these parts of you get to lean into the You that arises out of the sorting out and feeling. It is a journey unlike any other that offers a new way of feeling yourself in this great big world of Heart and Soul you signed up for.

I would be honored to be a co-explorer and reflector for you on that journey. For more information on our free Intro Call and how the SoulFullHeart process can support you in it, click on the link below or you can PM me as well.

Much love to you at this time of our evolution and involution.

*****

Gabriel Heartman is an emoto-spiritual men’s and women’s facilitator, energy healer, writer, poet, and heartist with the SoulFullHeart Way of Life.  Visit https://www.soulfullheartwayoflife.com for more information about space holding sessions, group calls, videos, community, etc. 

Feeling Manifestation As A Birthing Process And Relieving The Inner Punisher

My last two sessions have been very powerful when it has come to feeling the Inner Punisher. This energy is very intense and heavy when fully activated. Judgement swirls inside from self-to-self (or from our point of view from part to part), and it is outward from self-to-other. The outer circumstance is a reflection of what is happening on the inside.

If this is left unfelt, manifestation works to draw this energy in even more. The Multiverse responds. This punishing/judging energy can be rooted in our early childhood relationships, our Metasoul, and/or the Gatekeeper’s relationship to life and people. When wanting to manifest a particular timeline, this part of us can really wreak chaos internally and externally.

However, when you get to truly become acquainted with it (though it has usually been a more masculine energy in my experience), you stare to get an understanding of how much of your life may have been spent in deep fusion to this part. For many of us, it is not an attractive side of us, but has a TON of gifts!

The Punisher (which sounds scary in and of itself) is really a lamb in wolve’s clothing. There is a soft underbelly to all the barbs and jabs. There is a tenderness that I have felt once we got to feel it more. So much of that judgement is being waged against itself and trying to manifest that which is sitting in your Desire Bank, as well as trying to get the hell out of 3D! That is a lot to hold and feel responsible for.

I offered a lot of compassion and love to these parts, along with my facilitants, and when that happened we could feel how hard that was to let in. They are always in a state of outward or inward judgement mode that they don’t feel safe with being vulnerable. The biggest reason is that they are the most tender and vulnerable of them all.

When this part of you gets to be in relationship, they begin to move more into a role of Discerner. It is non-charged intuitive/opinion place that just sees the forest for the trees. When the charge is removed, manifestation feels a lot less like pulling a rabbit out of a thimble, and more like a birthing process. It takes the Divine time it needs to come into this physical dimension. The Punisher almost becomes like the excited partner along the way, seeing what needs to be done next to let self-love be the mid-wife.

We manifest what we need to heal. We give birth to what we are born to share and serve.

I am giving birth to my heart and soul gift into the world with each of these words. I offer my gift with a free Intro Call into how the SoulFullHeart Process can help to heal your Inner Punisher/Judger/Critic. Check out the website link below for more information.

Together we can help to shift so much of that energy in the world into a force of loving change. First from within your heart and then into the heart of humanity.

*****

Gabriel Heartman is an emoto-spiritual men’s and women’s facilitator, energy healer, writer, poet, and heartist with the SoulFullHeart Way of Life.  Visit https://www.soulfullheartwayoflife.com/sessions for more information about space holding sessions, group calls, videos, community, etc.

Healing Karmic Soul Patterns W/Your Metasoul In The Quantum Field

By Jelelle Awen

Processes have been going DEEP lately, much more into the quantum space beyond where traditional therapies and spiritual practices have been able to go before. Deeper, previously more subconscious layers of wounding and traumas, layers beyond the veil, are being accessed for healing….both personally and collectively.

The quantum love field is expanding all the time to support this next level healing in response to our evolving sacred humanity. This is healing that is possible not just in your current lifetime timeline, yet in ALL of the timelines/lifetimes that your soul has been fractured into as well from the original, individuated soul source of your Metasoul/Monad.

This depth, this deep dive, becomes more possible as the trust in your soul/Higher Self grows to hold the space for it. Your soul ‘takes over’ from your analytical mind and the parts of you that may want to control and manage the process. You more and more unanchor from 3D and even lower 4D matrix reality and into the higher dimensional, quantum frequency field of your Metasoul.

Connected to this field, you don’t have to access every lifetime/timeline in order to heal it. You don’t have to ‘relive and feel’ every trauma that your soul has ever experienced in every lifetime. You don’t have to ‘regress’ into ‘past lives’ right into the most traumatic moments, which often leads to MORE trauma to process (this happens often in past life regressions & soul retrieval as well). You don’t actually need anyone else to put you in a hypnotic state either or any kind of drug or plant to access these other lifetimes. 

Quantum connection happens as you negotiate with your Gatekeeper aspect, who is guarding your veil of amnesia and the timelines/lifetimes of your Metasoul that are happening in the Now. Negotiation and connection with your Gatekeeper allows you to become conscious of the lifetimes that MOST need your attention…..the lifetimes that you’ll get the most ‘bang for your buck’ if you access them. The lifetimes that are most vibrating in fear, pain and trauma (usually associated with killing frequencies). The lifetimes that offer the most reward and gifts if you heal them. 

As you ‘drop into’ and travel to those lifetimes with your Gatekeeper, you are meeting/connecting with your Metasoul sister/brother that is living in them. You form an ongoing relationship with the Metas sister/brother, just like having a bond with a sibling. In this ongoing connection, you exchange soul gifts with each other, you help them heal from traumas experienced in their lifetime, you are able to identify and see karmic soul patterns too. You support them to make more self loving and empowered choices that actually CHANGE the outcome of their timeline from tragic to redemptive. This then changes YOUR lifetime too as you gain access to more of your Metasoul’s pure frequencies.

As you engage in this work with your Metasoul brother/sisters in other lifetimes, you are actually able to identify and then complete karmic soul patterns and themes. This means that you NO LONGER need to incarnate as a soul into 3D and lower 4D timelines to play them out in order to heal them. I’ve been offered that many of us choose to come into this current timeline during Ascension in order to have this opportunity to no longer incarnate into denser realties. In this way, it may be our ‘last’ time of choosing this.

I am seeing this capacity to identify, dive into, and heal karmic patterns in sessions with women that I’ve been working with for longer term now and on a regular basis (weekly or bi-weekly). In the consistent space holding for the SoulFullHeart process, the Inner Protector and Gatekeeper is able to start relaxing and resting more. I feel the SoulFullHeart process and approach to karmic healing is completely unique, powerful, and held with a loving and collaborative energy WITH you.

I highly recommend beginning 1:1 sessions on a regular basis with a SoulFullHeart Facilitator if you are drawn to the kind of quantum healing opportunity that I am sharing about here. SoulFullHeart Facilitators Raphael Awen, Gabriel Heartman, and Kalayna Solais all have space in their schedules and a deep desire to work with new clients. They are currently offering a free 30-45 minute intro call over Zoom to answer any of your questions about the process, etc. More info here about that: soulfullheartwayoflife.com/sessions

Love is holding the space for the completion of karmic, suffering cycles. Now is the time to experience the power of what love can heal!

There is more in this video about Metasoul timeline portal access and healing with teaching and guided meditation with me: https://youtu.be/9jWgpQbXTZo

Love,

Jelelle Awen

Jelelle Awen is Co-Creator/Teacher/Group Facilitator/Ambassador of SoulFullHeart Way Of Life, a healing process and paradigm offering New Gaia Ascension frequencies to transmute trauma into love on emotional/spiritual/physical levels. For more information about 1:1 individual sessions with SoulFullHeart Facilitators, virtual group transmissions, four day gatherings in Victoria, BC, writings/books, and videos, visit soulfullheartwayoflife.com.

 

Introducing Free Intro Calls!

In this video, I talk about our new 30-45 minute Intro to SoulFullHeart call via Zoom. During the call, we would feel together the most presenting issue that you consider most affecting your current timeline.

As I state in the video these are varied and numerous for each of us. Either myself, Raphael, or Kalayna would clarify how the SoulFullHeart process can support you through the feeling, healing, and transformation of where you feel you need the most help.

Prior to the call you would access your Inner Protector via one of our meditations and answer a few short questions, though they may not have short answers. This helps us orient to you and your emotional and energetic bodies as well as gives us a place to go focus when on the call.

You can go to our website for more info at www.soulfullheartwayoflife.com/sessions or email us at soulfullhearts@gmail.com to set up a day and time.

Looking forward to meeting any of you who are seeking a different path to healing and seeing the world.

Love,

Gabriel Heartman

*****

Gabriel Heartman is an emoto-spiritual men’s and women’s facilitator, energy healer, writer, poet, and heartist with the SoulFullHeart Way of Life.  Visit https://www.soulfullheartwayoflife.com for more information about space holding sessions, group calls, videos, community, etc.

Navigating The Confluence Of Change

Just now recovering from one of the worst ‘flus’ in a long time. This tends to occur for me when going through lots of life changes at once. I have also recognized that it was at the confluence of the last 9 days, 9 months, and 9 years. Very catalytic and life-changing cycles all ending at one point. BOOOSH!!
 
It felt like I got hit by a Mack truck with symptoms all over the map, head to toe (including the teeth…a part of me needs to say.) I could feel how much my poor body has held this life and clearly in other lives. I have become more aware of it but this particular convergence really highlighted it.
 
I have come across so much darkness and suffering in myself and my soul over these cycles. I have also found more light & love than I ever expected to be privy to in one lifetime. This can be a challenge for the body to integrate in such a short period of time. I experienced myself differently during the past SFH Equinox gathering in a way that I haven’t fully assimilated yet. This brings up its own shadow/fear/excitement response. It needs to come up if I am going to continue to serve Love those I am meant to serve.
 
I saw my power. My gift. My desire to serve others, crossing territory that, in some ways, my soul has spent a millennia in. I felt the uniqueness of myself as a man, however I choose to define that. I have a sacred role. Not out of a duty but as a passion to create bridges into the New. I felt a growing closeness to and love for my feminine that continues to blossom everyday. I don’t know how I could do this without her.
 
I found a feminine star seed that I am just starting to tap into that I feel as a priceless gift to bestow upon me when the time is ripe. There are codes floating all around waiting for their landing pad. This is an exciting new frontier for all of me. The coming together of the Dark codes and the Light codes. They all have a role to play within us.
 
I am releasing a lot of my past relationship with Kalayna which has been a big catalyst for this rumble. So many gifts that I have been mining from the letting go. One being a revived relationship with my inner teenager and feeling his energetic bind with Mom that needed more purging.
 
On the physical level, a big detox of all the drugs, alcohol, and smoke that I consumed up until I started this journey 9 years ago.
 
Thanks for taking this in with me. I needed to unpack this a bit for myself and yet I felt to share as it may serve in its own way. It is both a personal chronicling and a shared experience.
 
We are all in a time of great change. How we are with those changes greatly influence how we move through them and where we land on the other side.

*****

Gabriel Heartman is an emoto-spiritual men’s and women’s facilitator, energy healer, writer, poet, and heartist with the SoulFullHeart Way of Life.  Visit https://www.soulfullheartwayoflife.com for more information about space holding sessions, group calls, videos, community, etc. 

Visit our website to offer a money donation to support our offerings at https://www.soulfullheartwayoflife/donations.

Mother Aphrodite Message Of The Catalytic Healing Power Of Falling IN Love

by Kalayna Solais

“Falling in love IS serving love.

It’s inhabiting its textures, its fragrance, letting it rumble through the chakras, feeling it raise questions about your next life steps, such as they are.

Falling in love can happen in any moment.

On the inside with parts of you. On the outside with a beloved soulmate or a friend or even with a complete stranger just because you feel their uniqueness in your bones.

Falling in love happens with nature, with the energy of the planet on which you live, with the forces of life and abundance and eternal movement with the galaxy surrounding you and the multi-verse you reside in at a larger scale.

All of this serves LIFE to happen in enriching ways that open up to MORE love… and that… that is serving love in a grand form that brings it inward, moves it in a flow that floods the heart of you and reaches toward the heart of others. It brings love to this planet, lets it download through the conduit that IS your soul and why you are here at this time.

And, with that, love cannot help but impact the world you live in in GOOD ways and boost the ongoing Ascension process of all that lives within you and everyone ‘outside’ of you.”

~ Mother (Goddess) Aphrodite

 

This message came to me yesterday as I connected with Mother Aphrodite (as I am feeling to call Her) in meditation yesterday. She is yet another face of the Divine Mother that we can connect with whenever we desire to. In fact, She does love to respond to our heart’s desires, as that is part of Her purpose and the archetype she IS.

I have been connecting with Her through and with a new Metasoul sister connection that I’ve made recently, who was a courtesan at the Temple of Aphrodite, offering her body in service to men who desired transcendence and also a connection with the Divine Feminine that they could not access themselves. Connecting with this ‘sister’, named Lysandra, has bridged me to this powerful and tender energy of Aphrodite, who feels very catalytic and who also seems to encourage us to go INTO love, not shy away from it, even if that means that the intimacy brings us to some messy places where we are in a soup of triggers and reactions or even ecstasy. I feel Mother Aphrodite in a more ascended form than She has been depicted in ‘Ancient Greek’ texts and so on. She even appeared quite blond to me instead of the usual red or strawberry blond hair colour that you most often see.

This message came as encouragement to continue to fall in love… whatever that means in any moment. It was an invitation to keep the heart open, to stay in curiosity, to hold patience for others as you bridge them to love too, and to trust that if you do feel genuine love flow between you and another being, human or otherwise, there is something more to surrender to in that experience… especially whatever this connection seems to be bringing up inside of you to be held and felt. I would not have access to this energy of Mother Aphrodite or this new Metasoul sister connection had I not been in a process of opening up my heart wider to others and feeling the kickback and defences of parts of me in doing so.

Mother Aphrodite is a bridge to both the glory and the gory when it comes to the passage and flow of love. She is a Divine poultice who it feels like can hold both the balm that love can offer and the catalytic craziness in moments that love can offer too as it stirs up so much inside of us, so much that we couldn’t have felt or healed without it being brought to the surface. Of course, there is also much She offers us in sexuality and sexual healing, honouring the pleasures of the body yet holding boundaries as necessary too to truly honour where you ARE right now and what feels good to explore and what doesn’t. This is something that has often been distorted about the energy She brings with Her and it feels like She would love to see this shift in the collective consciousness!

Much love to you and with you as you feel your own journey and recognition of the catalytic nature of love, especially ‘falling in love’, and the deep healing it can and wants to offer! ❤

~

Art by Emily Balivet

***

Kalayna Solais is a SoulFullHeart Facilitator for women, energy healer, soul scribe, and poetess.  Visit https://www.soulfullheartwayoflife.com for more information about space holding sessions, group calls, videos, community, etc.