shadow feminine – SoulFullHeart Experience

By Jelelle Awen

As we deepen into Autumn and approach Samhain/Halloween soon, the veils thin always at this time of year between dimensions. This gives us more access to our shadow consciousness and that which has been hidden from us.

Within the shadow of the feminine are often the parts, soul aspects and energies that have been suppressed and repressed in some way by the outside world and by other parts of ourselves. This suppression of energies that are considered shameful or threatening or unacceptable by others can be limiting to your soul awakening, emotional body healing, and the full-range expression of your feminine essence and gifts.

Shadow aspects are not evil or dangerous, even if some of their behaviors or reactions may be judged by other parts of you as not desirable or acceptable. Often what has been ‘put’ in shadow or beyond your conscious awareness are parts/soul aspects who have soul gift expressions, healing frequencies, innocence, and even your Divine essence itself. Your Inner Protector or Gatekeeper/Soul Guardian is usually the one who has access to these energies and negotiation with them can open up this space for you to connect, love, and reclaim what has previously been unknown, repressed, or lost.

For the feminine, our power expression and essence is highly protected because of the threat it has been to the patriarchal programs/Matrix reality. Painful punishment and shame loops (both inside and outside) can ‘keep’ our power from expressing as what we call our ‘womb roar’ when it is needed. Reclaiming our womb creation space (unplugging from the False Womb/Hijacked Matrix Womb) allows for more expression and holding of this power. Aspects such as our Inner Ursula/False Feminine/Sorceress can reinforce the sense that we are weak, disqualified, not good enough, etc. This entire dynamic of punisher-shame can also be in shadow until we become aware of it.

Creating relationships with these parts/soul aspects previously in shadow allows for more sense of self-love and worth; connection and communion with the Divine; more harmonious, resonant and intimate relationships with others; and completion of this-life and other lifetime patterns of suffering and trauma.

In a two-hour women’s group call on Sunday, October 30th at 5:00/17:00pm WEST (Lisbon/London)/1:00pm EDT/10:00am PDT, Kasha and I will explore connecting with the shadow feminine through sharing our personal journeys and also experiences in supporting women through our SoulFullHeart quantum healing process. We will share about how through a personal relationship with your Inner Protector and Gatekeeper, you can open up access to whole new and ever deepening awarenesses of the parts/soul aspects that have been previously unknown to you.

During this call, we will co-lead a guided meditation to connect with your Inner Protector, who will then open up whatever parts/soul aspects you are ready to meet from your shadow. We will also repeat affirmations as mantras together to recode our relationship to our shadow individually and together as women.

Here is a guided meditation to meet your Inner Protector: https://youtu.be/NJT7oWYYdAs

Here is a guided meditation to meet your Inner Ursula if you feel drawn to that exploration: https://youtu.be/drNsenYuAc8

You can receive these frequencies live with us (highly recommended to get the most transmission from it) or take in the recording afterwards. If you attend the live group, you’ll have the opportunity to share with us about what you experienced during the meditation and receive feedback/next steps of integration from us (this is totally optional). Plus, you’ll be able to take in and receive sharings from other women in the call, which is a powerful activation of its own!

This group is open to the public and to any woman over 18 to attend live. You can attend the group and/or receive the recording for an energy/money exchange of whatever donation you feel to give ($11 USD/$15 CAD is the usual amount people offer us).

You can offer your donation via our shop at soulfullheart.org/shop (credit and debit) or Wise (we can help you set up an account as it is very easy and no fees are taken for transactions) and we will send you the zoom link to attend and the recording afterwards. We are wanting to transition off Paypal yet you can still it use for this call at paypal.me/jelelleawen, include your email in the note section so we can send you the zoom link and recording.

More info at soulfullheart.org/events and https://www.facebook.com/events/3291530144437759

Hope you can join us for this powerful exploration into your shadow!

Love,

Jelelle and Kasha

A week from Sunday, Raphael Awen and I will be hosting a men’s group call about the subject of Sovereignty and Surrender, joined by our brother in heart, James Elphick. We will be diving into a topic that feels to have a lot of vibration for us men (as well as the masculine in women).

I have been in process of feeling a deeper layer of my mother wounding that is connected to a shadow feminine matrix programming called Black Widow. This is the name I received from this part/aspect of me I have been connecting with around this energy. She first showed up as a black widow spider to illuminate the nature of this woundedness and the programming itself. Then she morphed into a dominatrix with whip, heels, and all.

After some time of connecting with her and feeling who she really is underneath that all, I could feel something lighten and begin to get more clarity about this energy that may live in a lot of us men. This energy that uses guilt, shame, judgment, sexuality, comfort, and fear to keep us locked in a lower frequency, a state of suffering, a lulled state of disempowerment, or inner and outer judgment/punishment.

It is an inner battle of wanting to free ourselves from this web she weaves that I feel we as men are really trying to feel sovereign from. When we are engaged with other women in intimacy, this can really flare up. It triggers this need to be independent yet also the need to be connected in one form or another. There is a part of us that is in a push and a pull toward this energy and it is hard to feel fully empowered and vulnerable at the same time.

When she has this wounded Inner Mother energy, our Inner Teenager can feel the need to push back and seek independence. If she comes as Punishing energy, we may feel defensiveness and another need to push back. When it comes in as Fear, we may go to fight or flight. When she comes with sexuality we lose ourselves in our need for validation.

This Black Widow program/wounding has lost her connection to Innocence and to her own worth. She guards as well as feeds off this energy. Possessing it for herself out of need, not really out of some negative agenda, though it certainly feels that way at first. When I connect more with her with Love, the more she goes into her pain and her fear. Here is where healing and true sovereignty begin.

I can start to feel when this energy frequency of doubt, judgement, anxiety, or fear come in and I go to her. I feel her afraid to lose touch with me. I recognized those feelings were a tactic to keep my younger parts close to her. I am now going to her and bring her with me into the New. Into the Light from the dark crevice I first met her in.

In her more healed essence, she is our creativity and our sensuality. She is a face of our sacred feminine and our intuition. She is our truth and our discernment. She is our surrendered sovereignty into Divine Trust. She is our entrance into the exit of the Matrix itself. She knows the way. She knows how it works and operates. With that we can start to unplug (a sovereign choice) and surrender into the the New Earth world that is awaiting our creative power to encode New Earth inside and then on the outside.

If you are feeling a resonance or a curiosity about this programming/wounded inner mother energy and how it has influenced your feeling of your personal empowerment, sovereignty, and maybe a fear of surrendering into vulnerability, please join Raphael, James, and myself on this upcoming men’s group call. Visit http://www.soulfullheart.org/mensgroupcalls for more information. We would love to have you and feel what is moving for you in this area.

I also offer a free 45-minute consult/information call for both men and women that are wanting to feel more about how the SoulFullHeart process and space-holding may support this deeper dive into your wounding and unplugging. Visit http://www.soulfullheart.org/sessions for more info as well.

I will be writing more about this topic in relation to romance, intimacy, and community in the following week so please stay tuned. Sending much love to all during these very intense, yet activating times.

*****

Gabriel Amara is a SoulFullHeart Facilitator for both men and women. Visit https://www.soulfullheart.org for more information about sessions, group calls/events, videos, community, etc.

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