W: Hello Father. It’s a totally quiet Saturday afternoon here at the ranch; so peaceful in fact, I hope I can muster a connection with you.

DF: Hello Wayne. I like peaceful. I think we’ll muster a connection just fine.

W: Great, because I’m still wondering where to go with you today.

DF:   Let’s just be in the quiet together and see what comes to you or me and let’s feel into that together.

W: There’s a sweet and gentle breeze, all kinds of bird song, an apple flavored piece of hard candy in my mouth, and I feel a desire arising to connect with you Father. Hope that wasn’t too wordy for the meditative space you were suggesting.

DF: Connecting is so much easier than people make it out to be Wayne. It’s rare, but not actually difficult.

W: ‘Rare, but not difficult…’ Sounds intriguing…

DF: Well, you are starting out with an intention because you set out to connect with me for these dialogues. Intention is a great starting place. The reason for the intention is not so important, unless of course, it’s a pretentious reason, which means the connection will be mixed with a bunch of pretense, but even in that, there can be some connection. But beyond pretense, any reason to support an intention works. Desire, needs and wants are all especially good.

W: But why is connecting so rare though? What gets in the way of desire leading our Intention?

DF: Relationality has so much to do with Intention. A connection is something that is maintained by purpose, choice and desire. Without those things, coming from the heart, it withers in neglect and dies. But more to your question, Wayne, what gets in the way of intention is feelings of not being worthy to have the relationship, or oftentimes, for many people, it’s about not wanting to get close because they perceive the divine as punitive. So many barriers have been placed in people’s perceptions of God that they don’t really see a connection as something they’d actually want, even if they didn’t have the worthiness conundrum around it.

W: When I open my heart and my mind to our connection right now, I feel support and love for me. I also feel some feelings of needs and desires for something that I can’t quite put my finger on, something that I would usually go and satisfy with a sweet food, or a productive activity, or vegging out on line, or in a book. In that, I can feel that parts of me still has anxieties, desires, needs as I am doing life, and then I can feel a divine care and love for me in those needs as well.

DF: That’s interesting Wayne, because many people have thought that connecting with me is about quieting the mind from what they consider distractive noise. But if what your mind is on is a jelly donut, then that is where you are at. Those are not feelings to be transcended in order to ‘get to’ our connection, but those feelings are doorways to our connection. How did anyone ever think they could start from any other place than where they are at? It wouldn’t be them whose doing the connecting, but rather some idealized pretzel the person gets themselves into in hope for a connection.

W: Well, thank you for that Father, because even as we are talking, I’m judging, or part of me is judging that I’m not doing a very good job of connecting with you right now.

DF: And thank you for admitting that Wayne, because being real and transparent is what a connection is about, especially when you have self conscious feelings running, or judgments. The deal is Wayne is that you and I are already inseparably and fully connected, what we are talking about when we speak of connecting is letting in an experience of that connection that colors our feelings in the moment, that addresses a need, that fills the heart.

W: Beginning where we are at…, even as I felt a bit flat coming into this conversation, a bit unsure of how interesting I’d be, a bit tired from working till mid afternoon, all of that was part of where I’m at.

DF: Okay, so I said that it begins with intention…scratch that for now. It really begins with where you’re at, like you are saying, because you can’t start from any other place. Intention can only be grounded in where you are at in the moment. See, I’m not so sure I’m making sense right now either. So join the club. You know Wayne, If I could speak so eloquently and authoritatively and convincingly about what makes for divine connection, we’d just draw the latest group of souls ready to embark on a new religion, and god knows what that does. It hasn’t ever produced real and raw and heartfelt experience of the divine.

W: I love this feeling Father, that ‘thee’ designated starting place is so simply where someone is at, because everyone is ‘at’ somewhere.

DF: And wherever they are at is a sacred life experience, even if it is one of say, boredom.

W: I always hated boredom big time Father.

DF: I know, so let’s go there then. Boredom is you having a human experience involving you being ‘at’ somewhere and having needs and desires involved in where you are ‘at.’ Boredom we could call a disconnect kind of experience, but you wouldn’t be having it unless you were an alive human, which is all sacred, so let’s don’t degrade boredom as an unspiritual experience.

W: Is this why I was always bored to death in Church as a kid?

DF: Well, It’s part of it. Let’s take this trail of thought and feeling and see where it takes us. People came up with the idea of dressing up children in fine clothes, sitting them down on benches and telling them it’s godly to pretend they are having a good time and to ‘behave’ themselves. Somehow they were supposed to be anything but bored, they were supposed to be keenly interested and excited and happy to be hearing a sermon. If only a kid could yell on the top of his lungs, drowning out the preacher ‘I’m bored as hell with all your bullshit preaching on heaven.’ That would change the mood in there wouldn’t it?

W: My god, wouldn’t it?

DF: That restless kid is having a very sacred and divine experience, right where he is at.

W: You’re talking about me Father aren’t you? I sat in church twice every Sunday from a week old on up.

DF: Yes, I’m talking about you. You sat in church with your culture trying to constrain you into a reverence for something, when the reverential thing was actually you – bored to tears, no less.

W: Feeling utterly disconnected.

DF: When in truth, you’re bored feelings were the direct result of you being an expression of the divine, with needs to run and play in abandon and fun…

W: What I’m feeling as you say that Father is how when I’m feeling bored or disconnected, even to this day, is that I have some ‘should’ voice running of how I should be different somehow from where I am actually at in the moment. Then in that, I disqualify myself from our connection until I somehow break out of that trance.

DF: Boredom and disconnect are great starting places to connect with the divine. Way more real and effective than the spiritual calisthenics people pretzel themselves through. Underneath boredom, you always find suppressed desire.

W: Okay, so tomorrow, if I’m bored when it’s time for our dialogue, I’m going to see if I could start there.

DF: See that, real spiritual growth Wayne.

W: Crazy simple.

DF: And way funner.

W: Thank you Divine Father for meeting me where I’m at today.

DF: Any time, Wayne. Any time at all.

 

Wayne Vriend is a healer and author of 90 Days With Yeshua. Visit soulfullheart.com for more information.