By Raphael Awen
Essence is spring loaded within us.
It doesn’t actually need to be fought for, protected or defended.
Parts of us see it quite convincingly otherwise as something to fight for, and understandably so; for those parts of us and their reality, their experience, their truth, it’s a world of fighting along with winners and losers.
From our Higher Self’s reality however, ‘fighting for’ anything is a form of resistance and resistance presupposes an opposing other, which isn’t real to the Higher Self.
Try this feeling on for a moment from your deepest seat of being and see if it feels like your truth:
‘You are the source and essence of all that is. This essence is spring loaded within you, ever arising, ever unfolding, ever powerful, ever humble, ever seeking to experience itself through all the expressions of your being’
Does that get your resonator started?
I should note that not too many years ago, for me, the above statement would have been written off as total and complete blasphemy as I was then journeying through (unbeknownst to me at the time) the paradigm of separation between me and ‘God’. Now, I find this view not only resistive to myself, but also resistive to the ‘God’ I subscribed to, (as well as the deeper sense of God underneath my sense of ‘God’). If I was the creation of God, the reflection of God, why would God want to create ‘lessers’, who didn’t possess essence, but had to subscribe to ‘Him’ for it? I had to assume the role of the lesser, the subservient, or the worshiper to keep this ‘God’s’ ego intact. Then I would go on to chastise myself to be ‘godly’, but without any ego. It all degenerates down into a total and complete mind and heartfuck charade when it does and it is meant to. Can you feel the resistive energy in my words just now? A part of me wants to shit all over Christianity, and especially more so because this part of me has been seen and labeled as a demon. This part of me has a reality inside of resistance and wants to fuck Christianity royally, and needs to use vulgar language to get the energy across and out, as a fuck you to those who excluded and included around bullshit and the absence of love.
Bridging to this part of me from my new and arising reality which isn’t based in resistance, is to accept the part of me who has a resistance, however deep it goes. Nagging on this part of me to be other than it is only serves to suppress an energy that is sure to wreak havoc in my health and wellbeing. Getting to know and love this part of me, eventually inviting it into my reality of the joy of spring loaded essence is where a whole new adventure begins. This is my reason for being.
This is a whole new genesis story!
So when I say that ‘all is love’ and ‘there is nothing to fight’, I must be quick to acknowledge where in my being this is not true, or it’s just a shallow tinny sounding heap of spiritual horse poop! Actual horse poop is worth far more as it doesn’t pretend to be anything it isn’t. It’s the charades inside that we await coming to an end, that can then end the charades outside.
But even these charades don’t need to be fought against. Their death is also spring loaded. They don’t serve love, other than to provide contrast to love, serving as a bad example you might say. So in that, their purpose has a timestamp, like time itself does, as we return to essence being ever enlarged from the original essence we set out from.
Holeeee shit people! It’s all so holy, no amount of vulgarity or evil can take away from it, and no amount of veneration or awe can add to it. It just is and you are it!
When and as that sinks in, it leaves you in a true mission to get to know and feel every part of you for whom this isn’t true. This will keep us busy for a while yet as this true kingdom of heaven comes to reign inside where even the idea of a king and of reigning must eventually give way to love that just is!
Audio of this blog can be found here: https://youtu.be/gUtous_vHX0
Raphael Awen is co-creator, teacher, and facilitator of the SoulFullHeart Way Of Life. Visit www.soulfullheartwayoflife.com for more information about Weekly Sessions, Live Streams, Videos, and Community.