Wedged

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I’m somewhere inside the in-between.

 

What do I like, again? What am I like, again?

 

My skin erupts into a fiery red spread
crawling through the cavities and crevices
of what was once intact and clear.
A skin that hasn’t been comfortable
yet I have always worn it.

 

I’m malting and melting
scrambling for the ground
of what is coming.

 

The corner to turn is up ahead.

 

But how far?
I can’t see…
My depth perception is altered.

 

I feel a million miles away
yet the hot breath of change is on my neck.

 

No more enabled
In fact
I am disabled
in a really good way.
In a really scary way.
In a way I haven’t felt before
and I don’t know if I like it…
Yet somehow…
it could be…
that I secretly love it all.

 

If this wasn’t what I wanted
the path beneath my angry yet tired feet would change state
and I would change course.
But I don’t.
And I don’t want to.

 

So if this is what’s next
I will wedge myself here for you.
All of you.
And my eventual freedom
will change the snow to raindrops
and nourish all
and be with all
and surrender to my own All That Is
All That Was
All That Will Ever Be
There I will find you
and me
and them…yes even them.
Because we can never be disconnected. Not really.

 

And maybe that is all I ever need to know
and could ever need to truly surrender to.

 
 
**
Leena Colibri is an apprentice facilitator of the SoulFullHeart Way Of Life. Please visit soulfullheartwayoflife.com for more information.

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