A Digestion Of The Deepen 2022 Video Series

By Raianna Shai

This SoulFullHeart video series is such an incredible way to get to know yourself to an incredible deep level. They’re full of teachings and meditations that are so valuable for discovering who you are, why you feel and react the way you do, what your gifts are and how to heal even your deepest wounds. I’ve been doing this series for the last two weeks or so and even the more “basic” videos have been so enlivening and core to my current healing process.

There’s something special about connecting to 31 different videos that slowly but thoroughly help you dive into any and all places that need your attention. They can be taken in at any pace and at any time which allows you to go deeper into any process that feels relevant.

I have been on a deep journey of discovering my divine empowered woman and these videos have brought so many connections to light inside of me. They have taught me how much my inner mother wants to care take everyone to the point where it doesn’t allow others, or other parts of me, to live into their bigness and grow into the person they’re capable of. They have taught me that my inner teenager is ready to blossom and become a woman capable of setting boundaries and advocating for herself and the capacity of others.

They have woken up my inner protector enough for him to realize that he can’t keep me small and locked in my bedroom anymore. This journey has strengthened belief in myself and what I have to gift others. I have been able to dive into my shadow in a way that I was way to scared to before and recognize patterns that have been so detrimental to my own growth as well as those around me, even if for a good reason.

So thank you Jelelle, Raphael and soon Kasha and Gabriel for providing me with the tools I need to love and care for myself in a way that serves both myself and the collective ❤️

For more information about the Deepen 2022 series including a full listing of the content covered over 31 days, a playlist featuring each video released so far, and information about the two Deepen 2022 group calls, visit http://www.soulfullheart.org/deepen2022

Love, Raianna

~~~

Raianna Shai is a SoulFullHeart facilitant and website designer for SoulFullHeart Healing, a healing process and paradigm offering New Gaia Ascension frequencies to transmute trauma into love on emotional/spiritual/physical levels. For more information about free consultations and 1:1 individual sessions with SoulFullHeart Facilitators, writings/books, and videos, visit soulfullheartwayoflife.com.

Message From 2022: Choose To Be Alive, Be Free, And Be Love

This time of year there is a collective ritual of looking back and looking forward. Evaluating what happened this past year and what wants to be made manifest in the year to come. There are things we look at personally and things we look at globally. These past couple of New Year’s have been hard to peel away the two as separate as they have seemed bound to each other somehow. What happens ‘out there’ can directly influence and effect what happens ‘in here’.

This morning I felt like checking in with the New Year and feeling what it has to offer me personally and collectively. I have been connecting more with my Gatekeeper as well to continue to heal his own distortions, wounding, and relationship to Love and the Divine so that I can receive a clearer message rooted in compassion and passion both. I will write more about my Gatekeeper in the New Year as it will be presented in the upcoming Deepen video series with Raphael and Jelelle Awen. More info on that here: http://www.soulfullheart.org/deepen2022.

When I invited 2022 to presence itself I was drawn to the number two, obviously. The first thing I felt and saw was Choice. We all have a choice in this life, even in the most dire of circumstances. We may not have a choice in an external situation, but we ALWAYS have a choice on how to relate and respond to it. This power of Choice can be challenged in numerous ways and at profound depths. Do we choose suffering or do we choose Love?

I understand that this may seem elementary and basic depending on our circumstances, but I feel a sacred reality and truth in it each time I go in to feel what is gnawing at me or making me feel less than the Divinity I AM. We all have parts and aspects of us that can look outbound and compile a trove of evidence to convince our inner juries that we are fucked, worthless, or forever in some kind of suffering loop.

This is not meant to disregard those feelings, but rather meant to access the You that lives above those clouds and in the realm of Grace. I have been rewatching the past Matrix movies, and there was a scene in the third one where Trinity and Neo flew above the clouds in that dystopian world and saw the real Sun for probably the first time ever only to fall back down into it again to complete their mission.

This is what I feel 2022 is inviting each of us to realize. We have access to that world above the clouds and in the Graceland of the Divine. Not just to transcend and park ourselves there, but to recognize that we are more than the suffering while working through it at the same time. It is a matter of choice to see and feel it that way. Each moment offers us a portal into that choice and to challenge each of us to feel alive and in Love, even if that means feeling the pain of NOT feeling alive and in Love. That pain is actually part of it. Not feeling is the suffering.

This coming year, I’m sure, will provide more of the same when it comes to the insanity of the pandemic. Yet, this increasing insanity will actually allow each of us to poultice out our own sanity in the form of choosing Life, Liberty, and Love. It starts from the inside. It starts from feeling the parts of us that are in a state that doesn’t feel these things, or believe they are not possible. It starts with feeling that Sun above the clouds, even if it is just a faint recollection or desire. That sliver is the proof it does exist, just as a ray of sun peeking through thick clouds is proof there is a Sun even if we can’t see it in totality.

As I let this in, I feel such a deep compassion where all souls are at and what each is choosing. I feel a deep call to help others with this process of healing and leaving the suffering over the suffering. I feel to do this in the name of those that may not have quite the choice such as our children who are stuck in this upside down world we have all co-created on one level or another. We can each help ourselves which in turn inspires others to follow suit, so that we can begin to create and remember a world that upholds innocence as the Divine Child within each of us.

I invite you to check out the upcoming video series mentioned above as well as join our free online platform at https://soulfullheartportal.mn.co to partake in our digestion and conversation of the series and the year to come. It would be a blessing to have you a part of it.

Here is to a New Year and an Alive, Free, and Loving You by day and by choice.

*****

Gabriel Amara is a SoulFullHeart Facilitator for both men and women.  Visit https://www.soulfullheart.org for more information about sessions, group calls/events, videos, community, etc

A Love Story: Part Two (Falling In Love)

By Raianna Shai

The next part of this story is the part that we tend to spend our lives looking for: falling in love. The new and exciting rush of meeting someone that has an equal interest in us as we do in them. A new pair of eyes to see you, new ears to hear your passions and desires, new hands to touch the lonely and unloved parts of you inside and out. It sparks a hope in us that nothing like love can. We hope that this person will be the one we can grow with, who will understand us and treat us the way we’ve always dreamed of being treated.

More importantly than this outside love is what it sparks inside of us. It can allow us to love ourselves more than ever before while also bringing up our deepest insecurities. We begin by showing the brightest and shiniest parts of ourselves, hoping that will win them over. The way we enter a relationship is so telling of where we are at on the inside.

I remember the moment I wrote this poem, sitting under a tree staring out at the water. I felt elated and overcome by pure hope and love. I looked up at the leaves and they looked brighter than usual, almost as if they were glowing. In that moment I remembered feeling this way before. And then I remembered it fading and eventually leaving me completely. But it didn’t matter. Feeling it again reminded me of why we continue to search for this feeling over and over again even when it leads to pain or heartbreak.

This feeling is a reminder of what we are capable of feeling, with or without another person. All someone else can do is illuminate what’s possible in our own hearts and souls. Each relationship gets us closer and closer to this feeling of ecstasy and love inside of ourselves and without another person. We can feel this way with the divine, with our own inner parts, with our inner sacred union.

Without heartbreak, shadow and pain we cannot understand what it truly feels like to be in love and peace from the inside out. 💛

———————————————————————

A Love Story: Part Two
Falling In Love

This feeling of falling in love
With you and
With every part of me
Is like coming home

This is what my soul knows
What it’s been waiting to come back to
To feeling nourished
To feeling loved from the inside out
To loving the outside in

I see your face and smile
And even if it doesn’t work out
This feeling right here, right now
Is worth it all
This is what it’s all about

Freezing this moment and remembering
This is what we work so hard to get back to
This is why we dive deep
This is why we feel our shadow

Love,
Raianna Shai
SoulFullHeart Way Of Life

~~~

Raianna Shai is a SoulFullHeart facilitant and website designer for SoulFullHeart Healing, a healing process and paradigm offering New Gaia Ascension frequencies to transmute trauma into love on emotional/spiritual/physical levels. For more information about free consultations and 1:1 individual sessions with SoulFullHeart Facilitators, writings/books, and videos, visit soulfullheartwayoflife.com.

A Love Story: Part One (Heartbreak & Healing)

By Raianna Shai

I woke up this morning with the urge to create through writing but couldn’t quite figure out what I wanted to write about. I started scrolling through the notes in my phone and found several writings I wrote over the past two years that really brought me back to the moment and phase they were written. Interestingly, I found 6 pieces that seemed to represent a cycle from beginning to end and back to the beginning again.

This cycle in particular represented the phase of the ending of a relationship, to the beginning of a new one, to the end once again. It felt like a really beautiful arc of letting in and letting go and everything that goes on in between. I felt myself recognizing the patterns of relationships and realizing that even when things come to an end, they are so worth the journey in and out.

This isn’t just true for romantic relationships but for careers, geographical moves, finding your soul purpose, healing a trauma and moving into your next phase of growth. As humans, we continually go through cycles in every part of our lives and the only thing we can do is become conscious of them. After a death of a phase you may wonder, what’s the point? But looking back you may notice how much has changed from beginning to end.

Falling in love is beautiful, messy, painful, exhilarating and everything in between but just like any other death and rebirth, it’s so important in facilitating our growth. Each layer brings new realizations and understanding of what it means to find love and purpose in these human and divine lives of ours. We cannot exist without cycles, for without them we cannot understand the gift of being human.

To show what I mean I thought I would share these 6 writings as a marker of each layer that these cycles can illuminate and provide. Particularly in the context of relationships. The first one I felt to share is both the ending of one relationship and the beginning of another. Marking the phase of overlapping death and rebirth ❤️

———————————————————————

A Love Story: Part One
Heartbreak & Healing

I sit here
Gathering the pieces of my heart
Trying to glue them back together
The mismatched edges
And sharp corners
Almost fitting perfectly
And then not at all

You wait there
Patiently watching my broken pieces
That long for that perfect edge’s embrace
Slowly come together
All the while knowing
That one day I will come

I will come with just enough pieces
To hold together the contents of my love
When I am still chipped, but no longer broken

You are there
With your chipped pieces
Already glued together
With as much accuracy as truth can allow

And we come together
Look at that!
Our broken pieces create a mosaic of lost loves and tearful goodbyes
Not perfect, but beautiful all the same

Love,
Raianna Shai
SoulFullHeart Way Of Life

~~~

Raianna Shai is a SoulFullHeart facilitant and website designer for SoulFullHeart Healing, a healing process and paradigm offering New Gaia Ascension frequencies to transmute trauma into love on emotional/spiritual/physical levels. For more information about free consultations and 1:1 individual sessions with SoulFullHeart Facilitators, writings/books, and videos, visit soulfullheartwayoflife.com.

Sacred Desires And Fears – Both Are Our Portal To Full Remembrance

By  Raphael Awen

The thing we desire the most is also the thing we fear the most.

We want something that represents a feeling or assurance of some kind of more, but not too much more. We set our sights on attainable, reachable and manageable goals.

To shoot higher is to set ourselves up for failure, or even worse, to somehow attain that great and high thing, but then have to live with the fear of falling from such a greater height.

If all of our dreams somehow came true, how would we hold it together?

So we tend to settle for this half life of being in resistance with both our desires and our fears. They are both to blame and to be held accountable. Were it not for them, there wouldn’t be any tension. All that would be left would be bliss.

But to go and find some kind of life configuration that helps you kill both desire and fear, is to choose to not live, suicide in slow motion. Doesn’t most spiritual practices, paradigms, therapies and ways of life have at their core, this root of managing fears and desires?

Trouble is though that a human being is one of both desire and fear, and fears and desires are such great forces, that they can never really be managed. At best, they can be suppressed for a time only to emerge in your life with more strength than when you tried to disown them.

I am especially feeling this as we approach the new year, and feeling how feeling fears and desires opens us out to set an intention for the new year, seeing it for the portal that it offers us.

This is so different from the standard ‘New Years resolution’ energy, whereby you need to mount a self-discipline campaign, essentially suppressing the needs and desires of one part of you to allow another one to have its needs met. That’s about dominance, overcoming and suppression, one part of our being colonizing vast and beautiful territories of other parts of our being. The victor never feels at peace with the winnings because it doesn’t contain any peace. Possession requires constant vigilance to stay on top.

For the year to come, what can I feel within my desire body to receive as a shift in being, a shift in nourishment, a shift in getting deeper and truer needs met?

What fears can I feel inside of my heart space that are wanting to find transformation? What irritations and vibrations come up for me in whatever cycle or situations that they do? Why have I needed them up till now?

Could I truly embrace both of these fear and desire polarities within who at first seem to be holding each other at a standoff, but upon closer feeling and observation, I see that each holds the key to each other’s freedom?

I believe this is the deeper ground of truly setting an intention that has true power in it. It has power because it is able to surrender to both desire and fear, not because it overcame one at the expense of the other.

This feels like not only our great personal internal lesson of reconciliation with our divinity, but also like the great cosmic soul’s lesson before us as we watch the playouts of last year’s bifurcating events and narratives about the fears of death, carrying over into the new year at increasing levels of fear and polarization. Whether you’re afraid of the virus or it’s cure, it is the biggest monster in the room right now for so many, bringing up our personal fears within.

How could these heightened crazy times we find ourselves living in with many seemingly impossible situations be a turning point for you personally where your fears and desires are concerned?

This doula of death that showed up is here with consciousness’ permission and authority to help something transform that has wanted and needs to die and be reborn for a long time. Death isn’t ‘death’ as in an obliteration of energy. It’s always about change.

I’ve been quite taken with keeping up with news headlines a few times a day whether alternative or mainstream, for years now, seemingly scanning the horizon for evidence of this great death and rebirth, as if my personal fulfillment is dependent on the collective shifting, even while knowing the agenda in the news cycle. I’m feeling my being rising to a higher octave where the ‘news’ now needs to come from within, my own reports of what’s new from my own heart and soul domains.

I feel an intention brewing for the year to come of changing this relationship with the news, and it feels sooo inviting. Something deeply nourishing wants to replace what felt before felt nourishing, but no longer does.

What are you desiring for the year to come?

Deepen 22!

Jelelle Awen and I are releasing a daily video series beginning January 1st for the month offering daily short guided meditations and an overview of the SoulFullHeart way of life, and I’d love to have you join us if you feel drawn. It’s free to be a part of, but we’d love to receive your exchange with us in the form of donations for whatever ways it helps and assists you through where you are shifting and moving. You will find it on our YouTube channel: https://youtube.com/c/SoulFullHeartExperience

4 days from now we have our 12:12 Portal Transmission and Guided Meditation Group Call. I hope you can join us live at 5:00pm GMT/12:00 EST/9:00am EST on Sunday, December 12th and/or receive the recording by whatever donation you feel to give (usual is about $15 CAD) via soulfullheart.org/shop or paypal.me/jelelleawen.

More info at soulfullheart.org/grouptransmissions and https://www.facebook.com/events/328536115365602

Much love to you on your sacred journey,

Raphael

Raphael Awen is co-creator, teacher, and facilitator of the SoulFullHeart Way Of Life.  Visit soulfullheart.org for more information about sessions, events, videos, etc. 

Now Free: We are now offering for free our SoulFullHeart Portal on Mighty Networks, a virtual gathering place for sharing exclusive content from us such as energy update writings and guided meditation videos, plus community forum threads with topics and groups that you can read, join, and contribute to as you want. You can join us at the SoulFullHeart Portal here: soulfullheartportal.mn.co/

Photo courtesy of Kunai Shinde: https://unsplash.com/photos/-f0YLss50Bs

From Victim To Ambassador Amidst An Apocalypse

By  Raphael Awen

Seeing stories more and more of what only looks like concentration camps 2.0 in the name of protecting people, it strikes a fear chord inside of me.

How far is this thing going to escalate? How prepared is prepared?

What shall I do? How will I know what to do and when?

I gave these feelings and questions some heart space inside of a Divine Mother and Divine Father womb space this morning and was invited to feel some larger awareness around it all.

When we see the polarity increasing between two sides of any conflict, we are antsy to find the right side, and once we feel we’ve achieved that, we tend to expound the virtues of our side over the enemy’s side. We become virtuous warriors regardless of the side we’ve chosen.

Regardless of the conflict, if you feel into the energy of both sides, a quite surprising common denominator is seen. Both the designated perpetrator and victim are feeling and acting out of a place of fear of losing something precious to them. Though they are at polar opposites as to the solution of the crisis at hand, they are totally cut from the same cloth when it comes to what is motivating them.

If that’s true, then I need only look at myself to get a window on what’s going on deep in the heart of my enemy’s camp.

Deep at core, I don’t want to lose my life. I may feel I’m higher consciousness about this than I was before, even realizing that my true being can’t actually die, but only change forms, but still I’m not outside of this deep core motivation to preserve something precious and avoid something feared in the here and now. And in those somethings, is where I was told this morning, that we find resolution, both personally and collectively.

Now, I can only possess these kinds of fears if there is still ground in me of distrust towards my outcome, without which, I could be rest assured of a good and pleasurable future.

Is this the exact same world that my enemy lives in, regardless of our perceived and chosen oppositeness?

It feels to me to be the case.

This whole polarity world is maybe no better pictured than in our relationship with money. I must have money to survive, or I can’t be of use to anyone, let alone myself, unless I survive, so getting and obtaining money comes first. Period. Me first, you second, in a world of scarcity and separation, that is in the domain of money as we know it.

This perception of the world skews our relationship so deeply with all of life, and really gets backlit when there’s a perceived active threat.

Then this week, as I’m seeing the ugliness getting uglier, I can’t help but ask, ‘who are the real lords above all this conflict’? It takes one into the science fiction realm of off-planet realities and beings who would appear to possess a consciousness level higher than ours, able to pull strings and levers to get their way.

But if these beings are not science fiction, then what might really be motivating them?

Well, what motivated all of us to create factory farms, the concentration or containment camps for the animals? I say ‘we’ because if you’ve ever eaten an animal, you have a share in the whole endeavor. That includes me and you and that’s a ‘we’. We perceived ourselves to be of a higher consciousness than animals, so we felt and found a way to obscure any arising pang of guilt towards the whole operation.

But when the Nazi’s did the same thing with humans, that was ‘wrong’?. Well, not to them it wasn’t. Then there were the people’s countrymen who turned on their neighbors turning in the lessers to the new superiors, amidst all the chaos of the deeply polarized traumas. People were forced to take a side.

But what forced them? It seems to me that what really ‘forced’ them was not any outside authorities, but rather this shared common denominator of unconscious need to preserve oneself.

When you feel that both victim and perpetrator, (regardless of which side you perceive yourself to be on), both share this identical motive ground, you step up to the table of resolution and true ambassadorship.

First owning how deeply it lives in you to survive, and where your own fears of death lay, or fears of a diminished future, live inside of you, you are now able to see your enemy for who they really are.

They are you.

Now, the judgments and polarities are able to be resolved, because the sacred purpose of those judgments and polarities are completing. Their purpose was to bring us back into remembrance with ourselves, which is one and the same with bringing us back into being re-membered with one another, and putting behind us our necessary dismembered phase of consciousness.

The whole point of the polarity that we all signed off on was to leave oneness, so we could return to it, and expand it in the process, to give love a chance to see itself that it didn’t have before. Time was needed. Space was needed. Drama and trauma was needed. But we never lost this essence of being love, and that’s what haunts our fears of loss.

We know way beyond any kind of mental knowing a deep knowledge of being divinity, and when parts of us feel like they’re stuck in anything less than divinity, it strikes this chord of fear and anxiety. Will I ever get to return to really knowing and feeling what I truly am? This is the shared ground and it is called vulnerability. No matter how protected or powerful, no matter our chosen and championed side, we can’t escape this vulnerability.

These vulnerabilities are the portal doors back to full rememberance that we all must journey through in our glorious and awaiting experience of being re-membered with love.

Love really is this big of a deal and it needed dramas this freaking large to come to know itself.

If you remember, we all remember, as we are all inextricably connected, even as we journey through a necessary phase of perceiving ourselves as a separate self.

Love this separate self, get to know it and love it, find out how and why it ticks, toks and talks. It is your personal path of full discovery, full disclosure, complete reconciliation and total revelation.

My guidance circle said to me this morning, ‘Though it contains some needful apocalypse, I assure you that nothing could be more rewarding, fulfilling, fun, than this homecoming. It is the future that is filled with good things and you are well programmed for it, quite beyond any imposed ‘enemy’ programming’ or highjacked matrix reality.

Much love, I hope this helps you in some deeply inner way, but also helps to answer the many practicalities and choice points you are feeling, just like the rest of us.

If you feel I could be a resource to you, I offer 1:1 session space and would love to hear from you. There’s also 3 more of us facilitators here at SoulFullHeart who might also be a better fit for you. More info here: SoulFullHeart.org/sessions.

Also, Jelelle and I are embarking on a daily video series release come January 1 for 31 days, that I invite you to bookmark if you’d like to get acclimated to us a bit more. You’ll find that in the new year at https://youtube.com/c/SoulFullHeartExperience and a lot more is there in the meantime.

Much Love,

Raphael (and Jelelle )

Raphael Awen is co-creator, teacher, and facilitator of the SoulFullHeart Way Of Life.  Visit soulfullheart.org for more information about sessions, events, videos, etc. 

Healing Where We Are Anchored To Truly Raise Our Frequency

You may hear about ‘raising your frequency’ as a way to keep from getting stuck in all the lower energies that are pervasive in your personal world as well as the collective. This frequency raising is what can help shift us into a new timeline that is no longer merged with the dystopian matrix that is hanging like a cloud over the planet. It assists us in unplugging ourselves from the program that has kept us in darkness and disempowerment.

However, in this mantra of ‘Raise Your Frequency’, you may rarely hear HOW to do that. There is an inference that you just keep doing it and it will be so. I feel there is a lot to be said for ongoing intention and attention to our thoughts and feelings. The need to ‘rise above’ them and root into something higher. This, too, is true to me.

What I have experienced in my own journey is that we all have these little anchors inside or our emotional and psychic bodies that have substance and weight. When those anchors get triggered, we find ourselves back at the frequency that anchor is rooted in. There is a lot we can do to release that energy and get back to a more aligned and balanced state. Yet, if the anchor itself has not been addressed as to WHY it is there, then there it stays.

I have experienced some great methods such as breathwork, energy work, yoga, and meditation that have helped release the connection to the anchor and have felt relief, but until I have actually gone into the portal of this anchor, I have found myself right back at it. Kind of like an injury that hasn’t fully healed, it comes back to affect us time and again. The image of an anchor, or hook, seems to say so much about what it is I am referring to.

If we are to become more intimate with this energy/entity/consciousness, we find something a bit more visceral and real inside. I can use my physical or emotional pain as a way IN to this anchor, not just find a way around it.

Where does it live?
How does it relate to the world and to me?
What does it feel about what it is triggered by?
What are its needs?
What are its fears?
What are its desires?

These kinds of questions take me into a relationship with it. Not just solving a ‘problem’ or ‘getting above it’. In those cases I am leaving it where it is. By being in the Here and Now with it, I am choosing to feel it both as me and as separate from me. In that space, a healing relationship and a consciousness is formed that is not against but rather WITH. The externalities become secondary to this internal reality. This is what comes first, not the other way around.

Of course there are supplemental methods to this inner feeling and healing process. Those are so very needed to support and assist. They are all a part of the greater tapestry of what can help us to break out of the cycles and the heaviness we may find ourselves in.

When these anchors (in our work they can be parts, Metasoul aspects, or Matrix plugs) are given the focus of our Divine Self holding space for them and coming into communion, there is a lightening up that occurs for these anchors. In a way, they become re-anchored into a higher frequency like a step on a stepladder. These anchors heal in a spiral-type path where we may find ourselves back in their orbit when we find ourselves up-leveling and they haven’t. This is another opportunity for healing, unanchoring, and re-anchoring.

Eventually these specific anchors become more guides and gifts as they also ascend and move out of the program and world from where they were conceived. This is not an overnight or weekend retreat timeline. It is an ongoing journey. It is organic as well as intentional. We may inadvertently stumble upon these anchors or we may choose consciously to find them if we can feel that they exist somewhere in our emotional and psychic bodies. However, it should not be entered as shadow-hunting, but rather shadow-loving and understanding.

While this writing is more mental and conceptual about this process, the relationship itself is much more heart and soul-based. It takes us to the root of our roots. The places where we still have work to do, even if we feel we have done the ‘work’. I keep finding where I still have much to let go of and much to let in when it comes to decoupling and unplugging from what has been so prevalent on this planet for so long.

We are on our way back to Remembrance. This will kick up places where parts of us still live out of history, experience, conditioning, and programming. We must go find those parts and bring them back to the home of our Divine connection and our human heart. It is the inner version of WWG1WGA (Where We Go One, We Go All).

Time to replant these old anchors as seeds of the New Earth that is always here, just waiting to be remembered.

*****

Gabriel Amara is a SoulFullHeart Facilitator for both men and women.  Visit https://www.soulfullheart.org for more information about sessions, group calls/events, videos, community, etc.

Meeting Your Divine Self – Our Journey From & Back To Source

By  Raphael Awen

The farther we journey from source, the greater is our return to source where we are enabled to experience it for the first time.

This is the homecoming that you and I are now in, even as parts of us feel like the separation is growing.

It’s no longer the separation that’s growing, but rather your awareness of it that is increasing.

This week has been marked for me with another reunion with my Divine Orphan self that was triggered by some arising life circumstances, inviting the conditioned-to-this-life parts of me to feel and see this divine orphan self. I’m finding the beholding of this part again to be so moving and deeply rewarding, that answers the deeper questions at hand about the feelings of separation.

We were all initiated out of divine source into experience itself, and this experience needed to begin with what was not source. All of the fears, anxieties and depression we carry hearken back to our being birthed out of our divine bliss/oneness/source essence.

In this, we all were implanted with a great core wound, a wound that would underlie everything we would come to label as neurosis, things wrong with us. All of our attachments and quarrels within and without stem from this wound. But this pain and burden we carry is not only a wound that hurts, it is also an opening, a portal back, back to our true essence.

Your true essence is not conditioned by the conditionings of fear and lack that were needful for the experience journey. Your essence hasn’t participated here in the hijacked, 3D, matrixed, realm. Your essence remained untouched and protected from all of that.

The godhood you long for, you actually still possess and never lost. You just took on the experience of forgetting and of losing. In experience, you did lose divine connection and it hurts like the hell that it is. In essence though, you never lost a single thing. You are both experience and essence. More correctly, you are essence that took on experience.

You set out not to discover faraway lands, but to leave the land of your origin, so that you could return to it and discover it for the first time. As essence, you couldn’t know or feel or appreciate that essence and bliss. Bliss was left wanting to be known and felt and experienced. It was a risky endeavor, but your soul and the divine’s decided to fund this great discovery journey into reverence, awe and wonder.

As the increasing awareness of this separation rumbles in your life, you feel a fever pitch of everything coming apart at the seams. Everything you’ve worked so hard for to make experiential life bearable or even good comes now at this stage to be found to be not enough. In reaction, you may work harder as I have on gratitude and whatever other host of self-prescriptions to attempt to right your relation-ship with life, only to find they are not at all effective like they were before.

What the hell is happening?

You are beginning the return part of your journey home. You are sailing in the opposite direction. You are returning from where you came and the way you came. The return voyage has been negotiated through many lifetimes and so many experiences and you are ready now, equipped and prepared for the return.

The conditioning of lack and scarcity that you onboarded in your journey into experience is still here, and at times feels strangely and troublingly magnified. But this is all to be expected as you are called to feel and reconcile all the parts of you that are adjusting to returning to source – such a different experience than journeying away from source.

Now, you begin to get a sense of how sacred this forgotten core wound opening is. It is the one thing that would guarantee your return to divine source experientially. Your messed-up-ness is actually your perfection expressing and calling out to you. Each arising pain and ache is an intrinsic part of  the ongoing guidance as you restore to each part of you the pieces of their birthright that they are ready to feel.

Your preferences for pleasure over pain are a key part of your being human and of restoring your humanity with your divinity. You are invited not to bypass them any longer in the name of some kind of medicative spiritual practice. You chose to experience. You chose to want and to need. Those wants and those needs will need to be courageously owned and embraced if this voyage is to be completed successfully and on time (and in time).

As you witness the great fever pitch of insanity unfolding around you, ask yourself if you can think of any greater contribution to such a distress call than that of saving yourself, deeply choosing and embracing your own return journey home.

As you continue your return journey home as one being, you are reminding the oneness that we all are and share of this remembrance journey. Those around you in the forgetting phase will need your example when the time of their remembering comes, just as you needed it from others.

May we each embrace the perfection that we are amidst all that seems and feels so imperfect. May we set up a heart home with a great hearth of the warmth that will allow the fullest remembering.

Raphael Awen

SoulFullHeart.org/sessions

Raphael Awen is co-creator, teacher, and facilitator of the SoulFullHeart Way Of Life.  Visit soulfullheart.org for more information about sessions, events, videos, etc. 

The Arising, Authentic, and Sacred Masculine

In my ongoing journey of accessing and embodying my authentic, sacred masculine, I am finding where I have lived in the space between the Wolf and the Lion. The Wolf represents the more instinctual, primal energy, and the Lion the more kingly, leadership aspect. One with bite, the other with roar.

I have been aware of how both of these aspects have been hidden in shadow. A fear of my power and truth that lay within. The authentic, integrated masculine has struggled to arise for many men. There is a resistance to unleashing these aspects for a variety of reasons. When one hears the call of, “where are the real men nowadays?!”, there is a judgement in that somewhere rather than a heartfelt curiosity, both from those asking and from those of us receiving.

Yes, we are all being called to our power and truth, men and women alike. In that calling, we are met with our own personal initiations into the realm of our bigness and presence. We are sent on a quest through the hinterlands of the Shadow and what we have sequestered there until further notice. There is a veil of protection that lies in between. It is the meeting of this layer where we gain access to our most authentic self, rough edges, defensiveness, weaknesses and all.

We can respond to the trumpet of the call to action, and create an image based on someone else’s version of what it means to be a man in today’s volatile world. That may serve a purpose for some. A part of an initiation and growth edge. There is also going into what is real and authentic for you; your own process of self-awareness and empowerment that is not just about the collective but your own soul’s healing, maturation, and purpose on this planet at this time.

These energies are calling me to reconcile my masculine shadow and power as a sacred union mate, a community leader, a healer, and a teacher. These aspects are not separate from each other but integral to one another. They are also not separate from the feminine principle either. Again, integral. It is being held by this sacred feminine that the sacred masculine can arise with the trust that any shadow can and will be addressed with Love and Compassion.

This is my journey. My evolution into embodying and expressing more of what is true for me and not for anyone else. This is what I feel I am being called to live into and serve. To honor and awaken what has been hidden and forsaken in this masculine heart and soul, for myself and for those that it is meant to resonate with.

*****

Gabriel Amara is a SoulFullHeart Facilitator for both men and women.  Visit https://www.soulfullheart.org for more information about sessions, group calls/events, videos, community, etc.

Surrounded By Love

By  Raphael Awen

We are so surrounded by love, full of love, made of love, that we needed the ongoing experiences of stepping outside of it, and then returning to it, as a way of perfecting perfection.

Love was willing to create a deficiency of itself, a shadow partition to cordon off some of its overbearing light to afford itself; and you and I actual experiences of this love.

We couldn’t experience love were it not for a deficiency of this love. Love couldn’t flow if love was the all in all, filling all things to the full. Flow and experience required a vacuum, something missing. Love ventured into an experiment with experience, for experience was another thing it couldn’t know, feel or have inside it itself.

Every desire, anxiety, joy and fulfillment that moves and shapes your life is part of this vacuum.

Love ventured into the business of lack and harm and wounding because any step outside of itself would require an opening, a portal, a wound.

We live and carry these wounds. They are our greatest challenges. We carry them personally, in our relationships with ourselves, with every other we’ve ever known or will come to know, and we carry them collectively. These portal wounds are everywhere. They not only remind us of our seeming separation from love, but also invite us to return to love at any moment. The access to this love is beyond instantaneous, for not even an instant is required to make its connection. It just is. You are it. You never lost it.

The duality we find ourselves in is the way home. I am, therefore I want. I am, therefore I am vulnerable to not having my genuine needs met or fulfilled. I am, therefore I am afraid. I am, therefore I need.

To not have need is to not exist in this experiment of experience. You get to be needy. You get to admit your vulnerability. You get to feel how deeply you yearn for fulfillment. You get to admit what you like and what you don’t like.

You get to return fully to the love that you are, where all the costs and outstanding liabilities on this balance sheet of duality will be reconciled.

You and I literally are this reconciliation, as well as the separation, both.

Love to you and through you,

Raphael Awen

SoulFullHeart.org

Pic above: Jelelle and I got to enjoy 3 magical sunny days on the coast here in Portugal last week, while making the trip to pick up Raianna Shai from the aeroporto.

Please consider joining us for our intimate and upcoming group call Saturday, November 7th. Sign up info in the comments below.

Raphael Awen is co-creator, teacher, and facilitator of the SoulFullHeart Way Of Life.  Visit soulfullheart.org for more information about sessions, events, videos, etc.