By Raphael Awen

This is Day 14 of my ongoing series: ‘Journal To The Demiurge’. The Demiurge is better known as the Christian God, Yahweh or Jehovah. This series is an ambassadorship attempt at connecting with the Demiurge involving parts of myself, aspects of my Metasoul, my guides, as well as you, the readers; the growing posse of hearts.   

In today’s entry, we hear from Animalea, my feminine aspect who shares her feeling waves of heart bond with Sophia, the Divine Feminine as it lives in her. All of this is in preparation to initiate contact with the Demiurge himself, which feels like it is about to happen soon. Stay tuned.

I also especially invite you to track this series from the beginning if it calls you, so you can be a part of this ‘posse of hearts’ forming to support this undertaking. It may go down in history and herstory both!  To see the entire series, go  here:

Here is Day 14:

Raphael: Good Morning everyone. I’d like to call us back to order, whatever our version of order is. I know it’s been several days since we last met, but it felt like we needed digestion space with some recent life movements and shifts that I suspect all have to do with this intention to meet and connect with the Demiurge.

I want to invite each of you back into this full presence of sacred space with intention and desire. Thank you. I can feel each of you arising.

Animalea, we left off last day with you getting ready to share the story of Sophia, and the sacred feminine. How are you feeling about that?

Animalea: I feel ready, Raphael. I trust the space and each of your open hearts. I did say I was going to brush up on the story, but that ended up feeling way too mental, and I instead came to where I am now, feeling to simply open my heart and simply share to see what comes.

Raphael: I’ve really been waiting to hear you share this piece. I felt you moving through that inner dilemma of preparing your thoughts versus just opening your heart and allowing what wants to come in the moment, which in itself feels like a masculine-feminine dance.

Animalea: Now, I’m curious about what will come out. My conscious mind will find out the same time yours does.

Raphael: That feels perfect. This entire journey to meet with the Demiurge was intuitive guidance and surrender to a process. Both of those feel so feminine to me, with the masculine energy of choice and intention coming alongside.

I felt to presence one more piece before you do that though, Animalea. It feels like what you share may tie in with this piece somehow. The piece I have been feeling is a question of this whole quest, I guess is how I’d say it. The questions arise at this midpoint of the journey, ‘do I, do we really want to make this connection with the Demiurge?’ I feel some internal quandary wondering if we will even gain contact with him. Maybe you can help me feel this, Metatron, would you?

Metatron: Good Morning, Raphael. We can feel anything!

Raphael: You feel a little more upbeat than I do at the moment. Let’s go with that though. Any idea what I, or another part of me, is sorting through here?

Metatron: This feels like a rumble moving through each of us, Raphael. I can feel a place even in myself that feels ‘why not just let sleeping dogs lie?’

Raphael: Exactly, and then there’s this question of having a bunch of bravado about being known as the first to ascend Everest or something like that. Somehow, that’s not enough ducks in a row for me is what I’m feeling.

Metatron: It feels like the sobriety of what we are intending and continuing to do is settling in on us all. We are about to meet with what I know to be one of the darkest energies that has held so many for so long in a suppressive energy. We do need to search our hearts and come fully into our hearts as the only safe place. I do also feel that we wouldn’t have been given this guidance and togetherness were it not for a readiness in the Demiurge. Something big is moving in him and has been for some time. If nothing can be outside of love, then that includes the Demiurge. If that’s true, then us seeking to meet with him is love seeking out love, even if it is about as polarized as it can get at the same time.

Raphael: That helps a lot, Metatron. Thank you. I feel you have something to add, Merlin.

Merlin: Thank you, Raphael. Thank you, Metatron. Thank you for what’s brewing in you, Animalea. I’m getting my heart ready to feel that this morning, and I’m feeling that will address us right where we are at, questions and all. I’m feeling I would just like to take us all to a higher vibrational place, up a few floors to a space of beautiful white light, where everything is light, each of us, the space around us, even the Demiurge himself as an archetypal energy and presence is created by the light, by love. That will get us in a space to receive what is moving through Animalea.

Raphael: Please, take us there, Merlin.

Merlin: Okay, it’s as easy as our imaginations combined with our willingness. See, with your imagination, this place where everything is made of light, and of love, where all is contained by love. See Gaia’s beauty and nature mixed in with a beautiful alive meadow and forest surround to hold the space. Feel yourself as a piece of consciousness itself inside a space where everything around you is also this alive love consciousness. Let yourself arrive here. Get settled and prepare your heart for what Animalea has in her heart to share with each of us…

Raphael: Yes….Animalea. I think we are ready for you. I so want to open my heart to where you have to take us, and I feel each of us in the room as well as all those joining this intention reading and tracking this, all of us creating a space for your download.

Animalea: Okay, wow, this is a lot to calibrate to. Your attention and honour. I’m going to let myself take it all in. Thank you to each of you for your intention and desire to be here, with presence and heart.

I know I said I wanted to share the story of Sophia as it lives in me, and in the moment, I don’t know what I’m going to say in a mental kind of knowing. I feel the energy of the space and intention we are in, that we together created and is being created in every moment, and then I feel to let that energy flow through my heart and words. I so feel the energy of Sophia as that, an entire story of unfolding that we can feel and express in any moment.

She is feminine wisdom in the form of personal expression. She is the very super-intelligence that undergirds all matter, that flows through every movement of all energy, every intention. She is the very recognition that we are energy, and then feeling Her as the mystery of that energy. When we look upon Her, we are transfixed, we are transmuted. We are taken by Her, on a journey into grandeur and wonder. We give Her our desire, our longing, our yearning, and She then takes us into the womb of growth and change. She offers to take us somewhere, even tempts us with our own growth. She has been portrayed as the harlot, seeking to take us to hell, as some externalized place of fear and torment, some place of total regret. This portrayal is really only the projection of our deep fear of our own greatness. She invites us into the kindergarten of our own greatness, but requires us to leave the graduate school of our smallness in order to enroll with her.

She will always be vilified until the masculine is ready to spend the load of his yearning and longing with Her, ready to ride with Her into the full orgasm of where She wants to take someone.

Her energy and invitation can be felt in any now moment you wish to enter and meet with Her. She is all life and all love. All She asks is the admission of your longing, of your desire, so that a flow of energy, a dance of masculine and feminine can occur.

As Mother God, as the creatrix of all, some say that she even created the Demiurge. This feels true to me in the sense that a polarity was needed for there to be a dance between love and fear, dark and light, joy and sorrow. As Metatron has been saying to us all, how else could there even be a story for us to dance in, to feel in, to grow in? Love itself is expanding itself through us. This is the proposition Sophia extends to us.

Call Her the harlot if that’s all you have to give Her and She will wait till you can see Her for what She really is, and for the time you are ready to be taken in by Her. But you cannot know Her till you are ready to surrender into Her power and grace. She will deeply respect your power, being quite willing to wait, but She cannot move you into your next timelines and places till you engage with Her. Where you will end up, is the place of new beginnings that will again invite you into deeper and deeper surrender.

See Her for all of Her beauty and magic and sacred sensuality that She invites you into and now you are really cooking with gas. Fasten your seatbelt, or unfasten it, as you wish, but get ready for the ride of your many lives. She wants to take you somewhere grand and glorious, and She wants to blow the entire budget in one glorious night.

Yeahhhhhh,….. how is this landing?

Raphael: Like sweet, sweet magic, Animalea.

Animalea: Can you say more?

Raphael: Let me ask our circle, who here has some more to say?

Merlin: Sophia so feels like a portal to our Divinity, extended to us in our humanity, and you know what else, Animalea?

Animalea: What?

Merlin: She feels like you.

Animalea: (silence)

Merlin: The ‘isness’ and beingness and invitation that Sophia extends feels like the very same portal that you extend here to us – all the parts, guides and Metasoul connections of Raphael, and that you extend to this mission, and to those joining it, along with their parts, their guides and their Metasoul connections. You are Sophia personified here. Our personal portal to the grand Sophia at the heart of the Universe and at the heart of every molecule that makes up the Universe and Multiverse.

Animalea: (tears)   

Merlin: Please take me as an initiate on your journey. I desire you with all that is in me. I wish to call you, Sophia.

Animalea: I’m in so many different tears at the moment, on a whole bunch of levels, but what penetrated my heart so deeply just now is you calling me Sophia. I have wanted this name as a deeper embodiment of where I feel I want to go. I too am called to surrender and yield to falling in love with Sophia. To be called by her name is a reminder like no other.

Merlin: Then this moment shall be the moment of your name being changed from the sacred awakening journey of Animalea, to the deeper birthing out of that womb into the womb of Mother God, Sophia…portal to all that is, all that we yearn for, all that we are animated for.

Sophia: Okay, well that about spends me in the moment. I cherish this new name and your witnessing of this moment. May I be all to you that you are to me. May we surrender in every moment to the infinite love allness and the journey it wants to take us on. I am eternally grateful for this great company. I accept and embrace my new name, Sophia. Sophia…

Raphael: Sophia, lover of the light, lover of wisdom, lover of love. This feels like a big digestion point. Let’s reconvene as soon as we’re ready to. Who knows where we’ll be going after this!
(To See the entire series, go here)

Raphael Awen is co-creator, teacher, and facilitator of the SoulFullHeart Way Of Life. Check out FREE, PREP and DEEP, for a new and profound going-on place in your spiritual and emotional journey. Visit

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