finite – SoulFullHeart Experience

(You can listen to this blog post read out loud by Raphael here: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=1VR5N7OVzxo)

Infinite anything is really quite scary to parts of us.

What do you do with all the flour in the world? Yet, with a cup of flour, you can bake a yummy cake?

How do we enjoy or find pleasure in the infinite?

We are in our essence Divine expressions of infinity, or said another way, and possibly, yet even more profoundly and simply as well as scary, we are infinity.

I find parts of myself having been so conditioned in the measurable kind of exchange; where you get so much of this, for so much of that, to be feeling disoriented and even unhappy at times to be emerging more and more into this new world of infinite beingness.

It’s really strange though, because this infinite beingness is something I have wanted and prized even, having seen it though through the eyes of commodity and comparison. Then, when this new relationship with life begins to materialize as more and more as a default way of living, it definitely (de-‘finitely’) calls for some integration!

Yesterday, I went out to do a few hours of painting for our landlord, something I did as a career for over three decades. It was easy, peezy on one hand, all too familiar, humbling on the other hand to be ‘earning’ a fraction of what I usually once earned. I had this strange feeling of not really caring what I earned or didn’t earn, like it made no difference to me, which is of course very different to the me of yesteryear who liked to sit in a coffee shop early in the morning, adding up and prognosticating on a week’s profits.

The energy for all of that was so built in then, it just seemed to come out of the woodwork. I had to discipline myself to leave room for other things in my life, and not be a workaholic. Part of me was willing to be balanced, mainly because this part of me realized that I actually achieved more measurable and fulfilling results when I did so. It was all about the measurable quantities, whether of money or of joy, and everything in between.

So how does, particularly the masculine aspects of us transition from this relationship with the finite to the infinite? What would the joys and rewards look and feel like in a world immersed more and more in the infinite, in the ‘indefinite’, the undefined?

Do things like ‘results’ even come into play, and how do we relate to them when and if they do?

Love without boundary, love without measure, love without condition, all speak to this essence of who and what we ARE. We are this infinite being that chose to have a simulated experience with the finite. Here is where the divine is literally having this experience and learning through us.

We relate to this as an initiation, to be initiated out of the finite into the infinite. And that’s a really good word for it, because it is very initial, a beginning all over again. We stumble and fall before we ever walk, and the parts of us conditioned to results and professionalism and expertise can feel very frustrated in the transition, the trans-initiation.

We have to be willing to span two worlds, one that gave us much reward, where we were able to readily and even effortlessly marshall our energies in service of a goal and reward, to a world where results just emerge without our finite wrangling and dealing, where the result doesn’t bring the same assurances and pleasures in the ways that it once did.

It often feels like falling as this new world arises and the old one falls away. All our instincts are to restore balance, but balance isn’t what it once was.

What the equivalent of walking even looks like in the infinite world is difficult to measure or describe or to name the price for. All of measuring, description and costs per measure kind of realities don’t have traction here.

What does have traction here is a feeling. This feeling is a feeling of homecoming, of being Being. Of being reunited with the essence of where you started out from. Some big relief to all of the above described dilemma shows up in feeling awareness that the infinite expression of who and what you are actually PRECEDED the more immediately recalled experience of your time in the finite.

You are this big of a being to have dialed in this full range of being.

Now, we are in a place of being enabled to hold space for the parts of us in transition, to feel every frustration, every fear or anxiety that surely will and does arise in the process of trans-initiation. You were fully initialized into one world and now a whole new world calls for your initialization.

This is a particularly poignant feeling to be feeling of the day of the Lion’s Gate cosmic portal where the energetic alignment is in full support of transitions.

What gifts are parts of you longing to receive? What things are they longing to let go of?

If things like community, healing, and soul growth are on your wish list this cosmic Christmas, you may want to find a closer orbit with our soul family. One cool way to do that is to join us for our monthly group call, which happens this month to be later today. There’s still time to join in if you’d like to, or you can also receive the recording to take in when the finity of time allows.

You can find the joining details at SoulFullHeart.org/events

New souls coming into community is really one of the magical alignments of this new arising expression of the infinite for me. It’s just a portal to more curiosity and cure all around.

~ R ~

Raphael Awen is co-creator, teacher, and facilitator of the SoulFullHeart Way Of Life. Visit soulfullheart.org for more information about sessions, events, videos, etc.

The SoulFullHeart Portal on Mighty Networks, a virtual gathering place for community engagement, exclusive content from us such as energy update writings and guided meditation videos, plus community forum threads with topics and groups that you can read, join, and contribute to as you want. You can join us at the SoulFullHeart Portal here: soulfullheartportal.mn.co/ for a monthly subscription of $22.22 USD

As a being, you constantly express this infinity that you are, whether you are aware of it or not. This infinity manifests in you as both the desire for all things as well as the deep gratitude for all things. There is nothing in the universe that is not you, nothing that is separate from you.

Even the apparent created reality of a separate and distinct self, a finite self, is a created reality that we dialled up from our infinite self, to learn within. The finite was parented from the infinite.

Even the relationship you have with life wherein lack has been made the main story and conscious waking reality are also a powerful manifestation of the super-abundant reality that you ARE. You, AS INFINITY, dialled up an all too real feeling storyline of lack in which parts of you are the main characters living out something so far removed from the super abundant infinity that you are. Your waking conscious reality is actually one still very much asleep possibly.

Your soul knows that the letting go of the original conscious awareness of this super abundant infinity of being in order to enter an amnesia and subsequent awakening/re-membering process IS where the true gold of being is found….where each of us is reborn into something so much more than we were, even compared to who and what we were before we chose the amnesia. Even our original bliss state was undiscovered and immature.

Many dream of winning the lottery only to find that those who do cannot digest the instant rise to super abundance as they have not had a process of acclimating themselves to the wealth. The dream of ‘having it all’ comes from a subconscious knowing that they already ARE and have it all, and the inability to hold the All (lottery winnings) also comes from the unintegrated subconscious deep storylines of lack.

If you and I already possess it All, but we are living in a self-created story of something less than the dawning realization of that, then the present story we find ourselves in is the creation of our super abundant infinity.

And if we created this and are creating this, then we did this in order to awaken to THAT, and to feel all there is to feel in relation to the present created reality. Like a movie producer and story writer, we gave ourselves these dramas in order to feel the things that we as a soul knew we needed to feel in order to realize what we set out to realize. We are out and about ‘real’-izing the infinity that we are.

If this is true, then we have our work cut out for us. The ‘work’ has up till now gone on even in our unawareness and unawakened state, as we now awaken to an ever more conscious state of choice, intention and effort towards inhabiting what we most deeply and truly want. We discover that our waking reality is actually a bad dream and a sleeping reality that we wish to awaken from, that we get to awaken from, and that as unpleasant as this bad dream was and is, it is actually all originating in love, and part of love.

We’ve been given the seeds, the soil, the sun and the water, and now, the awareness that we ARE the gardener who is growing the garden of self, of love, of surrender to the divinity and infinity moving within our souls.

Our mandate now is ‘just feel what there is to feel’ and thereby to let-in this transmutation of our being that we are living out in each moment.

Each of us has new and powerful story lines awaiting our choice and appetite to step into. We chose this. Infinity itself is watching you with wonder and awe at what you will choose next.

If you are seeking a conscious awakening into the more that you already are, I offer a free initial consult into what ongoing sessions within the SoulFullHeart process could look like and feel like for you. Please check us out at our website below and be in touch.

Much Love,

Raphael Awen

Raphael Awen is co-creator, teacher, and facilitator of the SoulFullHeart Way Of Life. Visit soulfullheart.org for more information about sessions, events, videos, etc.