In nature, life never ends. Death is not an end, but only a change. When an illness comes into your body, it is seeking to bring change. Life is not trying to make good on a promise of security and safety that it didn’t ever make to anyone. When you entered into your life contract, you knew that. You agreed to that. You actually wanted that. Aliveness only gets it qualities from accepting the terms of life which is change and metamorphosis.
Wayne – Good Morning, Yeshua.
Yeshua – Good Morning, Wayne.
W – I feel a desire to connect again with you today though I’m a bit ‘under the weather’, as we say.
Y – Where would you like to go?
W – I’ve been feeling my resilience to sickness for most of my life. I only got a cold every few years it seemed and then only a mild one. I was kind of proud of it. I figured it had to do with my self employment thing. No one else is going to show up for me. It had a passion and strength about it for sure, but now I’m not so sure of how I had it all wired up. I had a money urgency behind it all too.
Y – What feels different now?
W – Now I’m feeling how when the body calls for downtime and enters what we call a sickness that this is actually a sacred movement of the body, that we either surrender to, or resist, or even negotiate for something in between.
Y – How could I help?
W – I’m curious about your perspective on illness. I feel a big tie to that around our personal currency, but I can’t get to the deeper perspective on it.
Y – Nature’s forces are seen as opposing when really they are the gift of all life to us. An earthquake that destroys a city and takes many lives is actually a huge gift of cleansing and metamorphosis and change. Life never offered to anyone any guarantee of safety. Only false life structures promise guarantee in this way. People who are set on only partially being in life seek out false assurances of safety and play victim to and set up an oppositional relationship to nature.
W – It’s hard to feel a huge and sudden loss of life as a gift.
Y – In nature, life never ends. Death is not an end, but only a change. When an illness comes into your body, it is seeking to bring change. Life is not trying to make good on a promise of security and safety that it didn’t ever make to anyone. When you entered into your life contract this life, you knew that. You agreed to that. You actually wanted that. Aliveness only gets it qualities from accepting the terms of life which is change and metamorphosis.
W – It seems like money and currency is all about the security and safety side of things. If I get the money, then I can be in life in this more adventurous way. Maybe then I will express my deeper gifts.
Y – When really life is asking you every day ‘Why are you here?’ ‘What do you really want?’ and ‘when will you reach for it?’ The anemic and false and safety oriented self seeks to hold life in a safety pattern where life can be expected to look tomorrow like it looks today.
W – Which makes it kind of interesting then how I did decades of engaged self employment largely escaping even cold symptoms for so long.
Y – The pursuit of safety can look very passionate and engaged. You had this ‘I will overcome nature itself’ kind of resolve to you which was admirable to many, but now you are moving to a place of moving with nature instead of being in resistance to it.
W – What does being in life on nature’s terms look like? Can you say more?
Y – Well, it’s really about feeling this piece about surrender to change. As you let that in and are present to it, that creates a reverence for the opportunity that is in this moment, whether it be a seed time, harvest, or anything before or between those. The money systems we’ve created were an attempt to overcome the cycles of nature, to find a domain where continual harvest could occur, where metamorphosis is overcome.
W – Even in this moment, I can feel my brain only engaging so far with the symptoms in my body. Even receiving what you are saying feels a bit foggy, but I felt I wanted to connect with your energy from this place too, to feel what’s real.
Y – What’s real, Wayne, is that life itself moves you. You don’t need to make life work.
W – I sure related to my money world as one big efficiency game. An efficiency of my body’s energy, staying healthy in order to produce more; my psyche efficiency, liking what I am doing and being liked by the people hiring me. Where it lost ground for me though was feeling how I was more and more overcoming something, fighting something. I had it all wrapped up in a feeling of ‘I just need to get ahead.’
Y – I just need to get ahead of what?
W – I just need to get ahead of the demand.
Y – What demand?
W – The demand of the bills. Whether the literal bills in the mailbox, or the bills of keeping up with maintaining my self image to the people in my life.
Y – What if part of you made up that demand as one big negotiated way of being in life?
W – I so get that. But why? Is it really all about safety?
Y – Being in life is being embodied. Embodiment is the acceptance of having needs and wants. Feeling your vulnerability to your needs and wants is being alive. Responding to your needs and wants is alive, and surrender to being in life. Making an enemy of these needs and wants is the fundamental offer in your money systems. I will get enough money so that my needs and wants won’t be an issue.
W – But needs and wants aren’t comfortable in the deadness of false guarantee, so they make themselves ever larger is how it seemed to me.
Y – Till an earthquake rumbled through to address the imbalance.
W – So, Yeshua, what does the new world look like then of surrender to my needs, having meaningful and fulfilling exchanges, coming out from under the yoke of safety and guarantee?
Y – If I described it adequately, would that make you willing to buy into it some more?
W – Well, a sales brochure wouldn’t be such a bad thing, would it?
Y – The offer, the magic, the result, the fulfillment, the meaning, the orgasm of it all is offered to you and anyone in any moment of your choosing. Connecting with the vulnerability of your real needs and wants brings you to the place where your divinity and humanity are not at odds. The experiences that arise from here profoundly and cumulatively change the trajectory and conditioning of your life at a rate and pace that you can self lovingly bear. Each person will need their own confirmation of that and it’s their birthright to have that.
W – Mine by right of my birth. I like that. I’d like to have my needs tied more and more to that, than to the false treadmill that I gave so much of my life to.
Y – Life actually does promise safety or security, but its security and safety is rooted in the reality of feeling loved and held in the midst of never ending change, rather than an exemption from change.
W – Well, if this illness I’m in the midst of is helping to rewire me for that, then I accept the gifts it brings me.
Y – Many of life’s deepest gifts can only come to you in your stillness.
W – Thanks, Yeshua, I’m needing to rest now again.
Y – Thank you.
In this blog series, Ending The Money Madness, Wayne Vriend shares his unedited and vulnerable journal conversation with Yeshua, who he experiences as an ascended teacher energy available to everyone.These blogs offer an exploration of money, what it is, how to relate to it, the financial collapse and transition to yin-based currency, the false self system created around money, etc. Visit www.soulfullheart.com for more about the SoulFullHeart Way of Life and read 90 Days With Yeshua: Modern Message From An Ascended Teacher for more enlightening conversations between Wayne and Yeshua.