By Raphael Awen

Experiencing and feeling what you don’t want is actually what’s key to experiencing what you do want.

To the degree you feel depressed is actually testament to your native capacity for enthusiasm, creativity and divine play.

To the degree you know what it is to feel anxiety, speaks to your natural ability for radiating deep trust, rest and security in relationship to yourself, others, and beyond.

The presence of the negative is the evidence of and testament to the presence and reality of the positive. One relies on the other for its existence. 

This tug-of-war polarity and tension between what you desire and what you actually experience is the pathway into navigating between the two in the direction you want to go. You are like this anti-gravitic travel device in this way that can dial up both gravity and levity to create movement. Knowing one allows you to know the other.

You wouldn’t even be able to feel tension, were it not for rest. You couldn’t feel love were it not for fear. You couldn’t feel trust were it not for anxiety. 

These polarities seem like opposites, they seem ‘opposed’ to one another. While they have polarity, they are not separate or opposed in the way we think of separation or opposition. They come from the same source, making them two expressions of oneness. No ‘opposition’ per se’, just polarity, the likes of which make for great romance.

All of this is flowing from the oneness that you are, that you came from, and that you are returning to. You are already perfect, just maybe not in the way a part of you defined perfection. 

If this is true, then what?

Then,….you are being invited to embrace the opposite, the thing that is ‘opposing’ the thing you want. It’s a magical doorway into the thing you want, an invitation instead of an opposition.

You can now choose to explore what you feared exploring, what you deemed off limits and parked in secluded shadow, to then have more and more arising felt experience of your true essence in your everyday life. 

Sounds like magic and play to me! 

Begin to really dream of the life you want. See it, feel it. Feel it deeply in contrast to fully feeling the life you presently have, but long to change. Especially feel and don’t deny the parts of you who just can’t see it, who just can’t get excited just yet. 

GET CURIOUS, open your heart to all that is inside of you. Enter the darkness. It is your magical portal into the infinite magic of being that you are!

I can tell you personally, that I no longer experience the unaddressed and avoided layers of anxiety or depression or shame that I once did. Where these things once lived in my life is now the presence of deep trust and arising creativity, and very meaningful and deepening self worth. This doesn’t mean I am without challenge. Duality still provides me with the tension between what I have and what I want. That’s called appetite, always moving between satiation and desire. 

What’s cool about this is that the courage it took to face and love my depression and anxiety is the same template for how I live in the moment of every day. What need is arising now? How can I embrace that need! Where is love wanting to flow and be felt? 

What largesse of my being is wanting to engage it’s next step into the world of infinite love and infinite possibility?

We are this crazy hot stuff, only reeling from how magical we are, how infinite we are, how full of love we are. Everything ‘else’ isn’t anything ‘else’, it’s all the same pointing to the oneness we are inside, outside and collectively.

Raphael Awen is co-creator, teacher, and facilitator of the SoulFullHeart Way Of Life.  Visit soulfullheart.org for more information about sessions, events, videos, etc. 

Please consider joining Jelelle Awen, myself and others for Free To Be Two – our soon upcoming six week group call series held on Wednesdays (May 20th to June 24). These two hour group calls have been very transformative and healing for those who participated. A donation of any amount gets you the Zoom link to join as well as the recordings of each meeting in case you’re not able to attend. They’re also a great way to get introduced to SoulFullHeart if you’d like to. You can get more info and sign up here: soulfullheart.org/freetobe2 I really hope you can join us.