Feeling Gratitude For My Highest Timeline Manifestation

By Jelelle Awen

For the first time in five years, I have a dedicated space/room for doing recordings, video series (more about my 33 Day one starting on January 1st coming soon) and SoulFullHeart sessions…..both remotely AND in person! I just feel so grateful for this higher timeline manifestation and opportunity to serve love. My dog Koda likes the new space too as he can settle in now to move energy…which he does in every session. 

This is so much due to the support of my beautiful community and the amazing, brave, soul and heart HUGE women I am honored to work with! This is also the house for which we will host our five day retreat in February, which you can read more about here: https://www.facebook.com/events/381861869219826/

We are all letting in the massive goodness that we are experiencing since moving here to Victoria, BC, Canada from Mexico NOT EVEN two months ago! So much manifestation coming our way…including now a household full of furniture (most of it FREE and yet in good shape still), winter clothing, a wonderful, affordable van, new alchemy in SoulFullHeart and other money earning opportunities, and new people connections too!

This is what it feels like when you move into your Higher Timeline service of love….the Divine gifts you with whatever you need to see it through, to live it, and to experience it. I have envisioned and energized this timeline for YEARS now….one step at a time, some of them feeling like backwards steps yet ultimately moving forward. I have given up my belongings, geographies, and relationships many times in order to align more with my higher soul purpose…….with increasing trust and surrender along the way. This has taken much negotiation and feeling out with parts of myself and soul to BE here now.

And I know that I could NOT have done this without the love and resonance of this community of souls/hearts around me, especially my counterpart soulmate Raphael Awen….who has been on this journey with me for ten years now, always seeming to trust where my vision is leading us while he also grounds us both into the most nourishing heart frequencies in order to help make it happen.

This is also what the completion of 2018 and the year 2019 is offering you….a more LIVED IN and LOVED IN experience of your highest timeline…of your ‘dreams coming true.’ As I write this to you from the house of my dreams (very literally), I can attest that this is a powerful time/phase for manifestation if your heart/soul is ready for it!

If you’d like to experience a 1:1 session with me or other SoulFullHeart Facilitator over zoom or in person for $55 USD/$72 CAD minimum donation for 90 minutes, more info here: soulfullheartwayoflife.com/sessions

Jelelle Awen

Strong Energies Of Change Moving Through

By Jelelle Awen

These are shorter posts, pictures, and energy status updates from this powerful week of energies….shared originally on my facebook feed and on my instagram.

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“Strong energies of change moving through right now with all these various storms and next level timelines energizing AS old ones are collapsing. This is next level transition for ALL of us. This shifting can bring up confusion, spaciness, lostness. Gather your inner family into your heart (esp. your masculine) to feel clarities arise from this unifying heart space. ~” September 12



Stairway to heaven in the clouds this morning during sunrise! The sunrise codes have been AMAZING today and yesterday as the 9/9/9 portal offers a taste of the NEW earth, NEW life, NEW you, NEW soul self IN the body coming through….. September 10


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9/9 Blessings! Completions/Endings/Collapses To Arise ANEW…the Service Of Love You and New Earth Timelines…..September 9


Jelelle Awen is a Parts Work/Metasoul & Galactic Aspects/Sacred Union Teacher & Facilitator, and Ascension Guide. She is Co-creator/Facilitator/Teacher of the SoulFullHeart Way Of Life awakening/healing process and community. She has written four books about Ascension, awakening, and emotional body healing. Visit soulfullheartwayoflife.com for more information about bridging and ongoing individual/group sessions over zoom with her for women and other SoulFullHeart Facilitators with men and women, events/retreats, videos, books, etc. Visit our donations page to offer a monthly or one time money donation to support our offerings.

Supermoon Codes Offer Inner Illuminations, Timeline Activations, Sacred Union

by Kalayna Colibri


As I felt and ‘saw’ the light codes coming in the early morning from the Supermoon today, they seemed to softly fall like snow or fairy dust upon my beloved and I, as we lay in bed. They looked like sparkling gold and though we weren’t outside, I could feel them come in through the windows and walls, finding their way to us. I hadn’t thought much about light codes coming from the moon and what they could mean or offer. In some ways, the moon hasn’t even been on my radar all that much, though of course, how could a Supermoon go unnoticed?!

They seem to be a sprinkling of something magical, that is also natural to arise now in this stage of Ascension. There is always an alchemical magic, though also a profound and often quite emotional process in letting go and letting in, which is something I’ve written about for the last few days as I have been walking out and feeling deeply my own process of doing just this very thing. So many others seem to be experiencing this too right now, as this IS the process of letting in higher timeline desires and possibilities too… the imminence and immediacy of claiming what we truly want yet also what and HOW our soul wants to serve LOVE, is something we are all invited to feel, feel, feel. It lights us up like a bright torch or beacon, calling us back to us, back to our sacred union within, and into deeper territory with a sacred union outside of us too, for those who have drawn that and for those who are likely about to draw that! It is the goodness of life and of love itself that we can feel now, even and sometimes especially through the painful moments of realizations and dawning truths. The pulsing, purging and pain lead to relief, revitalization, and release and a letting in, lighting up, loving OUT experience of ourselves and of life too.

Residual wounding, core wounding too, can all be held now by you, with the help of guides and this Supermoon fairy dust energy of light code sprinkles. Asking for the help, love and support you need is an invitation for all as the Ascension energies continue to move in and ramp up, amping up the anchors and moving parts of us into the spotlight held by Love. There is no end to the inner love flow that is available to be dipped into as you continue on your journey of healing inside, being with parts of you and soul Aspects too, bringing in and breathing in the energies that want to support not suppress and hold you through the next states and stages necessary for your inhabitation of new and next growth edges and places.

If you wish to discover more about parts of you that may be in resistance to this dance with the Love and Ascension energies coming in, there is much this process of SoulFullHeart can offer you, if you feel desirous and ready for deep transformation and change from the heart UP. http://www.soulfullheartwayoflife.com/sfhprocess

Also, if you’d like to experience a tip-toe into one-on-one SoulFullHeart energies, Raphael and Jelelle Awen will be hosting a group call next Saturday, December 9th @ 11:11 am CST (Mexico City). You can join us there for an $11 usd minimum donation and keep the recording of the call afterwards. During the sharing portion of the call, you can share about your experience with anything that has been moving through you, ask questions, and/or just BE. More info here: https://www.facebook.com/events/813881412132524  ❤


Kalayna Colibri is a SoulFullHeart facilitator for women around (and under) the age of 30, energy healer, indigo-crystal bridge, soul scribe, and poetess.  Visit https://www.soulfullheartwayoflife.com for more information about space holding sessions, group calls, videos, community, etc. Visit our Patreon page to offer a money donation to support our offerings at https://www.patreon.com/soulfullheart.

Death/Rebirth During This Great Shift W/Gaia

By Jelelle Awen

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As Gaia ascends and raises the vibrational frequency of Her grids from 3D to transitional 4D and into 5D and higher, we are invited to ‘come along’ with Her during this Great Shift. Our capacity is LIT up at our most leading edges of BEing and the seed of our sacred human is watered by PURE love and light waves. At this leading edge of BEing, we have the potential to respond to these frequencies from Gaia with open hearts, minds, and souls. This embracement guides us into unknown and Infinite Possibilities of access to extrasensory perceptions and expressions of our ‘super human’ selves…becoming like the super heroes that we watch in movies.

Yet, the Great Shift is a death and rebirth process and is not meant to be smooth and easy. To bring in the NEW, the old must be let go of. The ‘space’ taken up by the current needs to be vacated to allow the NEW to arise. There are labor pains that PUSH OUT the birthing of NEW. For Gaia, there is the often tumultuous adjustment of raising Her frequency WHILE being occupied by seven billion humans, who are all in their own varying degrees of awakening. She receives support for this conversion through many Star BEings who seem to live underground and also stay in Her orbit, waiting to assist when needed. Ethereal BEings, such as angels and archangels, are flooding Her with light and support too.

It feels like the expressions of extreme weather patterns, global warming, ice caps melting, volcanoes erupting…these manifestations actually represent the Great Shift out of 3D disconnected and polluting and abusive relationship to Gaia. There is a way that this is an environmental collapse, yet one that doesn’t have to lead to mass chaos and collapse of all our current industrial systems at one time. As more souls awaken, their relationship with Gaia changes to more consciousness, love, respect, and mutual reverence. These tones from us allow collaborative solutions to come forward to respond to the energy resource and environmental issues in 3D.

Again, Star BEings are ready with many very technologically advanced solutions to our energy woes, many that seem to be available in the Now for us to use immediately once collective consciousness is more ready for them and to embrace Star BEings in their everyday world. Star BEings have already intervened MANY times in our modern era to prevent nuclear war, mass killings by fear-based groups (called Cabal, Illuminati, the Elite, etc.). An aspect of the current transition is the public disclosure of this group AND of the collaboration with benevolent Star BEings to move this group out of power. Learning more about this disclosure process as it relates to 3D life can help give a sense of how this all might continue to unfold.

You are probably feeling a parallel process of transition as Gaia’s. Even as you can perhaps see, taste, and feel in moments what your NEW higher vibrational life IS, you are still in transition to BEing this more. This, again, is not an easy changeover with much more ‘ash in the air’ than confetti. Your world has been connected into the 3D matrix and conditioning of your culture, of your birth family, of your friends, of your schools, of your jobs. Your body’s every cell holds the cellular memory of 3D living and your DNA vibrates to this frequency as well for most of your life. There is MUCH toxicity taken in through polluted water, chemicals in food, fear-based energies dominant in so many people.

Similar to Gaia you are ‘switched on’ when your ‘time has come.’ Your soul awakens in a very dramatic way with a one-time surge of Kundalini or Nondual or Oneness energies OR in a gradual, walking out experiences over time. Your soul and Higher Self energies flood your inner space, bringing new desires to learn and grow, to lift the veils, and to shed the ‘skin’ and ‘suit’ of 3D life that your 3D self has HAD to create in order to survive incarnation here. Some areas of your life fit this soul frequency right away and others are more difficult to transition.

This changeover from 3D to 4D transitional and higher can have ups and downs, ebbs and flows for you. There are relationships that you discover are more about your 3D self or personas, masks, or ego (what we call ‘parts’ in SoulFullHeart) that are most prevalent. You feel then an ache to just ‘be yourself’ more in relationships and if others around you are not awakening and shifting too, it becomes an intense and often painful ground of letting go, taking space, and completing WHILE love remains in your heart for them.

At some point in the process, settling and shrinking your frequency to fit in with others, conform to 3D expectations or reality…it just isn’t possible anymore. The previous 3D life runs out of ground and what you could formerly ‘tolerate’, you no longer can anymore. Even your 3D self is ‘done’ with it. This doneness allows ALL the areas of your life to more reflect your soul self.

The parallels to Gaia’s process of ascension and your own may provide illumination for you to gain a new context around what is happening to you AND in the world. Gaia will be ‘done’ with 3D reality too and maybe already is with those souls who still need to experience it going into other timelines on other planets.

There are times where the current world can seem a ‘mess’ and IS one in some ways. Yet, out of that mess comes the NEW. Out of your experience at times of emotional chaos and mess can you feel on the other side of it a clearing inside for the NEW. Going into the chaos inside, holding space for the death and rebirth, connecting with the parts of you that resist feeling it, and understanding WHY it exists, allows it to move.

Gaia and EACH one of us is being held with SO MUCH love to undergo this VERY brave conversion and birthing process. The support is there from so many sources and can be found by going within, becoming open then to drawing what you most need to continue this LIFE altering, death and rebirth shift into the NEW.


Jelelle Awen is Co-creator/Facilitator/Teacher of the SoulFullHeart Way Of Life. She is a Soul Scribe and author of four books about Ascension, awakening, and emotional body healing. Jelelle offers a 90 minute one on one bridging session with her over zoom for $55 USD min. donation with women and with other SoulFullHeart Facilitators…more information here. Visit soulfullheartwayoflife.com for more information about sessions, events, videos, etc. Visit our donations page to offer a monthly or one time money donation to support our offerings.


Embracing Changes In Your Life As Love Expressing Itself

By Raphael Awen


When you come out the other side, you are unalterably changed.

Life is a continual movement, yes, but I’ll bet that you are feeling change acutely right now.

All of this has to do with the fact that there is something so unexplainable about the magnitude of you, the uniqueness of you, the desires and the mysteries that live inside of you. You know it and you know it can’t be written off as ‘just all ego talking.’ Some impulses are frightening and feel dark and others are pure light. Your world wants to change and all of your being is somehow in on this desire. An unmistakeable and definite storm is brewing.

Yet so often a stasis sets in, and the past seems to want to extrude itself into the future. Storm? What storm?

Questions and aches live unanswered in you. How can I find and flow with this new me that wants to rise? Why does it feel so private? Why does it feel like there isn’t any handrails? Where will I end up if I act on these impulses? Is saying yes to change like lighting a match to a rocket strapped to your butt leaving you in a point-and-shoot without much say in where you end up? ‘So what shall I do?’ you ask.

Let’s let those questions bake a bit and feel into all this some more.

The ground you live on is like an island underneath you. It was once so large, you never even knew it was an island as the theatre of your life supported all of your life movements. But now, a rising tide has narrowed the land mass that undergirds your life. Why would, and how could a life so full,…. become so narrow? Did I do something to displease God? Am I just lacking in gratitude?

Your awareness has grown to see that the land may even be soon completely inundated by water, making the island completely uninhabitable. You’re anxiety grows exponentially with each passing season that you don’t choose and act. Inaction feels more and more like the height of insanity.

I’d like to offer you that there isn’t anything that you could have done or not done to have escaped coming to this juncture in your life. You see, your life is not separate from all of life and all life is now undergoing deep and heightened change. The entire creation is feeling what you are feeling. It shows up differently in each person’s life, but the common denominator in all of this is that love wants to find its way in. Love wants to colour your experience of life. Love wants to intone frequencies of sound and light into your heart to allow your heart to be both a pool of beauty and a re-broadcast centre.

Yeshua said ‘You are a city set on a hill, so don’t try to hide your light under a bushel basket. Let others see your radiance in how you live life and glorify the Christ-consciousness that lives in you.’ There isn’t anything cooler, not in this galaxy or the next one, or what’s considered the most distant one. Love is all in all, through all and to all.

You already know this,…as John the beloved said ‘you need not that any man should teach you, as the spirit teaches you all things.’ Change and knowing how to flow with it intimately is native to you at the core of your being. It is only unfelt parts of you that are resistant to change and seek to maintain life structures that are designed to avoid change. It is important now that you feel these parts of you, get to know them, their needs, and shed their tears. This will change you in that very process, and afford you the courage for the next step, and the next step after that.

If you don’t embrace this time of change, the coming rising tide will still inundate your shrinking island. There is no escaping the times of deep change that are upon us all.

For many, their refusal to accept change even as it sweeps over them will only be about weaving a victims claim that life screwed them over, and then being able to prove that to the world around them, as their personal apocalypse. Life doesn’t want to screw anyone or anything, or you, or any part of you,…over. It cannot in fact. Only you or I in our creative function can make that feel like and look like a reality.

The alternative prospect of instead letting in love, however, is just too much for many at this time. There is nothing wrong with this as seen from a higher level. Each soul is learning profoundly and deeply, regardless of pace. There is no time urgency that says they need to wake up sooner than they are. Each of us needs the time we need in unconsciousness. Even those of us having the deepest awakenings today will come to see these awakenings overshadowed by grander and grander awakenings. Even the soul who deeply chooses to play victim to change is in the midst of profound awakening ultimately, albeit in a longer lease on time. All that really matters to you and I, if we’re wanting to awaken is this question of ‘am I letting in what wants to flow in or am I in more of a stance of resistance?’

Granted, there will be pain to feel if others you are now close with aren’t ready to embrace what is moving for you. But how close in fact are you now, if what is arising in you can’t fit comfortably within the bond? The question ultimately becomes ‘what is the greatest expression of your love to them?’ Leaving a bond by laying down your end of the rope, or by setting others free of an unhealthy grasp is a far higher love expression than efforting keeping them in your life.

No one can ultimately escape your life as we all are so much more connected than we realize. It is because we are so intensely connected with everyone that we need new and arising boundaries (that can let in and let out) in our lives and relationship. Feeling and grieving the loss of a relationship where the ground is narrowed and can’t find a new opening is life moving you and guiding you. The tears you and parts of you have to feel in the process are some of the most alchemical life movements that your soul chose to experience in coming here. You came here to learn about both your individuality and your oneness with all– at the same time no less.

Everything, you see, is all spring loaded to love. You are spring loaded. The universe is spring loaded. It’s so spring loaded that you trying to ‘help’ it only gets in the way most of the time. Acceptance and self-love will gain you so much more mileage while any and all attempts at fixing and bettering yourself will serve only to keep you in a resistance loop to change.

Take a moment and imagine yourself in the most desirable outcome imaginable on the other side of this change that life is offering you. You’ve certainly given yourself to imagining the worst, right? See what it feels like to do the opposite. The best case scenario that you imagine may not be the outcome in terms of the physical details, but if you are feeling loved and supported within that best case imagined scenario, I can tell you that THAT assurance and knowing will be the essence of the outcome that this change wants to bring to your life. What could be better?

Feel that.

Does that feel like your truth or does it just feel like I’m doing a good job on selling you something? Your truth is what matters here, not mine. If you can let in the feeling of being loved and supported, you are finally feeling the difference between being in resonance or dissonance with life and love flow.

Any regrets about all the time it’s taken to reach this point melt away in the presence of this incredible love. If there was available all that time needed to get here, then how much more is there to bask and play in this infinitude of life and love?

Holy shit!? All the shit is holy.

There’s your new cosmology reduced to a few choice words. Tear out that statement of faith at the back of your church hymnal and replace it with this one. Don’t let any facsimile of someone else’s awe and reverence from yesterday be a fill in for your heart bursting in climax with the curiosity and visceral joy that IS you.

Does that lay to rest the questions that we let bake earlier, or at least begin to?

Everything I shared with you today, I shared with you from my side of the same veil we all share. I don’t actually know anything more than you do. If my words resonate for you, that resonance is proof that I am speaking your truth….underline ‘your.’

You just got a wave of your own divine self. Merry Christ-mas.

Let it guide you in feeling and responding to the threatening water surrounding your life island. Let these threats be changed into oceans of love and support and guidance for you in regards to how to set your sails as you let go of your island that life is coaxing you off of.

This is your greatest gift to the world around you. There is nothing passive about letting in this swell of self-love. This is your greatest and most effective activism towards the great evils that abound in our world.

You and I are love. Even if we’re quarrelling, we are this love that is already now in possession of all. I don’t quite know how to conclude this writing…because there isn’t any one fitting conclusion….there is only you letting in love…to you….through you….and back again.

I hope your holiday season is filled with as many moments of self-love as you can handle.

Raphael Awen is co-creator, teacher, and writer at the SoulFullHeart Way Of Life. Visit soulfullheartwayoflife.com for more information and inspiration. 

Lighting Your Fire And Taking Action Before Collapse Comes


By Jelelle Awen

Seeking knowledge about current world conditions that contribute to an overall sense of impending collapse is important. It’s a necessary phase that provides a growing sense of urgency, like putting kindling on a fire before you light it. The kindling could be scouring the internet for alternative news sources, reading social critics who provide a more radical and controversial viewpoint such as James Kunstler or Thomas Lewis and connecting with like-minded people in online and local transition communities to receive validation for your growing certainty about collapse coming. The sticks pile up and grow as your mind deconditions from cultural conditioning and seeks to separate from the group mentality that is so pervasive in our culture.

But, then what? You’ve got a nice pile of kindling going but it isn’t actually keeping you warm. When are you going to light the match? When are you going to start throwing logs on to get your fire really going? Lighting the match is about actually taking action, doing something in response to all that you’ve learned about collapse and are digesting with others. For us, lighting our match was about initially assessing if where we were living was going to provide us with the four essentials of survival: the logs of our fire, if you will, and then, taking action to find our sanctuary. We asked ourselves some hard questions, including if where we were living in British Columbia, Canada near the city of Vancouver on a coastline that is only accesible by ferry was really the sanctuary we wanted post collapse? Due to its high cost of living pre-collapse, short growing season, cold winters, and the significant impact that post collapse life would have on the people there (we imagined a lot of looting and panic), the answer was ‘no’. There is fresh water there and perhaps more chance to survive related to climate change, but, for us, the need for warm climate that provided a long growing season and less reaction after collapse from local people outweighed all that.

Once we decided that we weren’t staying in the same area and needed to leave as soon as possible, the match was lit to begin researching a place to go with a warmer climate. We decided on Mexico because we could drive there by car; we were more familiar with it; it has very fertile land; and the infrastructure collapse will be much less jarring than in western cultures. Quite quickly we found the ranch here, a 700 acre ecovillage about two hours from Puerto Vallarta with hundreds of fruit trees already planted there and multiple natural spring water sources. Solid infastructure has been built there for many years, including extenstive water pipelines to every house and trees. There is a community kitchen and bathroom/shower building, plus two large palapas which would allow us to host groups, couples, and individual retreats. We also liked that it wasn’t a community based on a guru or religious belief system, but was about individual lot and home owners living in a community that offered the potential of collaboration without a set expectation around it.

The ranch provided the most essential logs for our survival fire post collapse: shelter, fresh water, fresh food (the fruit trees plus organic food we would grow ourselves), and safety (being in a remote location that has good challenges in traveling easily to it.) With the potential of being at this ranch and feeling the logs of survival taken care of, we lit the match and began our exodus journey from Canada to Mexico, which I describe here.

The point of this article is that it feels as if more and more people are becoming aware of collapse and are in the kindling gathering stage. But, if they do not take action and light that fire and find those survival logs, all of their knowledge won’t mean anything when collapse happens and, sadly enough, they will perish along with those who never saw it coming at all.

Taking action is scary. Very scary. This is why parts of people debate endlessly about which place to go to without actually going anywhere, (if they decide that they can’t stay where they are, which is of course the ideal decision if the four ‘logs’ of survival are available). We feel strongly that the winter of this year and going into spring of next year will bring some major changes to the industrial world, economic and political systems especially. This is based on research but, also, it is based on our own intuitions and guidance from the Divine. For those who don’t feel or experience Divine guidance, I imagine that it’s hard to get what I am saying. But even if you don’t, I am urging you to take action based on your own instinct then. And start taking action immediately, way before collapse makes it so much harder and maybe even impossible to do so. Basically, stop talking about it and do it.

Yes, there will be fear and anxiety. There was and still is for us, even as we are now in the final stage of moving onto the ranch and hoping to begin planting seeds in the next few weeks. We’ve spent many years of focus on our emotional and spiritual healing, which I feel does make it easier for us in some ways. But, even with that, I feel that anyone can move forward from where they are and begin to find their sanctuary and making their way there or creating it out of what they have. Living ‘as if’ collapse is coming brings a purpose and momentum to life even if it is years before the ‘official’ collapse of industrial society actually happens.

We have already experienced so many gifts from making this life change, from living ‘as if’ collapse could happen any moment. We have left a cold and dreary climate to a warm one that doesn’t have frost or snow. We have increased our knowledge immensely of native plants, edible weeds and flowers, making our own soups and cleaning projects, living off of solar, etc. all of which makes us feel more empowered rather than dependent on the ‘grids’ to provide for us. As a community, we’ve increased our sense of collaboration, trust, and love with each other- even as we’ve had issues to sort out at times along the way. For me, as a healer and teacher, I feel a renewed sense of dedication to what I feel I am here to bring the world because I am even more deeply living my message with integrity. I am ‘walking my talk’, which is rare in the world of spirituality and emotional healing. I also feel more surrender into accepting that my form of service may come more in growing vegetables than in serving others.

We have thought of our own survival first, and yet, as healers for many years, we want to offer what we’ve experienced, learned, and drawn to ourselves with others.

Jelelle Awen is co-creator and facilitator of the SoulFullHeart Way Of Life. Go here to connect with Jelelle on facebook. Visit the SoulFullHeart website  for more information about virtual sessions with her.

Freeing Yourself From A False Life And Claiming Your Soul Purpose: Conversations With Divine Mother About Global Collapse


By Jillian Vriend

Jillian: Hello, Mother. The camp is quiet in the moment and I felt a desire to connect with you.

Divine Mother: I’m glad, Jillian. I feel a desire to connect with you as well.

J: I’m surprised that I’m not feeling more overwhelm and anxiety right now, considering that we are leaving in four days. Just four days and we’ll on our adventure to the States and then heading into Mexico in about a month. We’ve been planning this for what feels like forever and now it is finally happening.

DM: You’ve not just been planning, you’ve also been feeling. Feeling reactions of yourself and parts of you during this time of adjustment and transition. This is why you feel less overwhelm and anxiety.

J: I get that and, also, it just feels so right. I’ve never been so sure about anything in my life than I am that this is the right move for me and for those coming with me. It’s not so much about an absolute knowing as it is a feeling of being held and supported by you that makes it so clear and easier to navigate.

DM: For people who are not in surrender to Divine guidance, there is a feeling of uncertainty and lack of direction to their lives and the decisions that they make. They are in reaction rather than in response. Because you have been open to connect with me and, most importantly, accept guidance from me, you’ve been able to benefit from the clarity of purpose that brings.

J: That doesn’t mean that I don’t have moments of fear, anxiety, doubt, etc. Accepting guidance from you doesn’t shut down my feeling capacity, as you won’t allow it to be used to not feel.

DM: Yes. Rather than using ‘surrender to God’s will’ as a way to numb out with bliss or conviction or evangelical zeal, I offer the frequencies of my love with a complete respect for your sovereignty and an invitation to feel all the reactions that parts of you have to this love and guidance.

J: This is difficult to describe in words. I’m struggling to take what you are vibing to me right now and put it into words and concepts that people can understand.

DM: Don’t try to help them understand. Help them feel. Help them see. Help them heal.

J: Is that still my purpose here? It feels sometimes like I am just about practical matters and content-based living.

DM: Responding to practical matters has been important and it’s a grounded place in you that allows you to do that. You’ll need that to establish your gardens and shelters in your homestead and to remember many practical skills of survival that you’ve forgotten in this modern age. Yet, you are more than that too and your consciousness provides the context for the content.

J: I was reading last night a book by David Icke and he describes the sense that an awakened soul is aware that they are infinite awareness having a human experience. And that they are in the world but not of the world. That deeply resonated for me.

DM: Yes, and that can be a painful reality at times as most people are in the world and have mistakenly come to believe that they are also of the world. I believe that you call this being, “fused with content”.

J: Yes and with self identity supported by the false self and conditioning received from our birth family, society, friends, educational systems. Most people feel like slaves to me in a deep way. Slaves to content and to the medications and drugs they use to remain numb and asleep. Slaves to following the rules and conforming to others. Slaves to money and the contracts it binds them to and the meaningless jobs they undertake to keep it all going.

DM: The false self has imprisoned the heart, mind, soul, and body of most people. As you said, made slaves of them. Yet, ultimately, they are slave and master both. They hold the keys to their own freedom. All they have to do is see and feel how they are in a life that imprisons them, but that they are not of that life. They need to begin feeling the essence of their sacred humanity and the goodness of their human heart.

J: When we’ve told people about our plans to go to Mexico and live there off-grid in an eco-village, many people have expressed an envy at our ‘freedom’ to do this. As if we had some key or secret formula to liberate ourselves that they do not. And while it’s true that we’ve been blessed to get very good paint jobs lately that will fund our trip and buy our land, we’ve had to make very tough choices the last several years that have led to where we are today. And we’ve had to feel our way there, negotiating as we go. Letting go of all relationships that don’t serve our higher purpose and self. Letting go of most of our material possessions and, soon, letting go of modern conveniences to move into a more sustainable and off-grid lifestyle. So while it seems simple what we are doing, it has taken much emotional and spiritual healing to be able to do it. Much extracting ourselves from the false self world and the conditioning grip it holds on us.

DM: Yes! I’m glad to hear you declare that as it advocates for what others will need to do to become masters of their own authentic lives.

J: It seems rather hopeless, Mother, that many people will want to do this.

DM: They will be given ‘no choice’ in the matter with what is coming very soon. It will feel like no choice as circumstances ‘force’ them to give up their old life to embrace a new one.

J: I feel like many people would rather kill themselves than do that.

DM; That will be a likely outcome for many, yes.

J: Whew…that is heavy. I feel the heaviness of that in my heart.

DM: The contextual piece here is that every person that is alive on the planet earth during this time has chosen to be here during this time of great transition and death and rebirth. The questions for them to feel into that can provide a lifeline for them are: Why have I chosen to be here? What purpose do I have in being here? If they can feel why they are here and connect with a meaningful purpose, then whatever they are giving up of their old life will feel false in comparison. It is highly unlikely that their ultimate purpose is about ending their own life.

J: But maybe some people are just meant to not make it through what is coming. I have a fairly strong picture of what is coming with your support and I can barely stand holding it at times, wondering how I will bear it all.

DM: But you aren’t meant to bare it all, Jillian. This is the gift of foresight that I give to you because you have done the inner work to be awakened before there is ‘no choice.’ You will bear and witness what you are meant to with a trust that this is so.

J: Well, at times a trust and at times not so much.

DM: Of course, this will ebb and flow. For others who have foresight about the future and the very obvious consequences to unconscious actions that the human race has engaged with for many, many years…..for these people, they will have a sense of navigating the waves rather than being crushed by them.

J: Thank you, Mother, for the reminders about connecting with soul purpose as a means to navigate the coming changes. I’m going to go bake some oatmeal cookies now.

DM: Good, enjoy the simple things while holding the complex ones and you’ll be fine.

J: Thank you.

Jillian Vriend is co-creator of SoulFullHeart Way Of Life and currently on an exodus to an ecovillage in mexico. You can read more about connection with the Divine Mother in Jillian’s book, In The Arms Of Mother.


Exodus And Finding Sanctuary: Conversations With Divine Mother About Global Collapse


By Jillian Vriend

Jillian: Hello, Mother. I felt that I wanted to journal with you again in public with so much shifting and changing in my life and in the world. It feels like things are happening fast now.

Divine Mother: Hello, Jillian. I welcome a public dialogue with you. As you know, I enjoy talking with you this way as it reaches your heart and has the potential to reach others. It doesn’t matter to me whether people reading this believe that it is me you are talking with. Only that the message goes into them.

J: What is the message you’d want them to take in, Mother?

DM: Well, it’s getting more urgent, isn’t it? The message is that time is running out on the false self created world of industry and unlimited growth. Time is false, yes, an idea created by the mind to hold hostage over arising reality. But, time in the sense of playouts coming in the immediate future is real. These playouts are consequences for a disconnected and wounded relationship that the human species has had with the earth, with animals, and with each other.

J: We are feeling a sense of collapse coming strongly this fall and winter. I wanted to go over some of the conditions that lead me to feel that way with you, but, also, I wanted you to offer guidance for people around what they can do and feel personally.

DM: Let’s start with what is happening right now and put it into a larger context together. There is much content available in your ‘news stories’, yet there is very little context to allow the heart and soul to digest it.

J: I guess the big one to me, besides ever looming climate change crisis, is the intensity of the wars that seem to be springing up at an increasing rate. I find that I don’t have a lot of energy to understand the facts behind the wars in the Ukraine or the Middle East, yet they feel out of control in a new way. Maybe I’m just so weary of ‘dropping bombs’ as a means to end war. More violence to end violence makes no heart sense to me.

DM: War is a manifestation of unhealed inner violence. It is the false self’s outed expression of an inner sense of powerlessness. This sense of powerlessness and unworthiness has led humans to resolve conflicts with increasingly sophisticated and devastating weapons. No one ‘wins’ in this scenario. Empires that have been built on the spilled blood of men and that need more blood to maintain them cannot be sustained.

J: Wow, that so goes in. The other increasingly alarming situation is the growing numbers of people dying from the ebola virus in western Africa. Our human history is full of virus epidemics although it is frightening to imagine one now.

DM: Viral bacterial are natural and nature’s way of maintaining balance. This is difficult to say and my heart strains as I say it, but the human population has expanded to numbers beyond what your planet can sustain. This has to be corrected in some way and, unfortunately, all the means of doing that lead to the deaths of many people.

J: That’s the aspect of collapse that is so hard to digest. I wish it could be different.

DM: Me too, my daughter. As you know, I have not interfered with the course of human evolution as it would have been going against your sovereign choice to do so. Yet for those who connect with me and surrender to my guidance, I offer them that death and rebirth are natural and inevitable cycles. I don’t offer protection from necessary death, yet I do offer comfort during the process.

J: There are other things happening too, yet I also wanted you to talk about what people can do in response to what is happening.

DM: There are two possibilities for people right now: immediate exodus to find sanctuary or create sanctuary out of where they already are. Sanctuary is a safe place where they can practice self reliance, ideally within a conscious community.

J: I feel self reliance has a practical aspect to it and an emotional and spiritual aspect to it. The practical aspect is about meeting for yourself, or within community, the four keys to human survival: food, water, shelter, and safety without reliance on the government to provide it for you and in balance with nature. Examples are growing your own food is an environmentally conscious way through permaculture practices. Finding natural drinking waters sources from fresh water springs or lakes. Creating shelters out of naturally sourced materials that meet your basic needs with minimal impact on the earth. Moving to less densely populated areas with opportunities for all four keys to human survival to be much more likely in a self reliant way. I wrote more about that here.

DM: Yes, these practical considerations are actually about going back to the roots of your species when your survival was held by the sovereign heart of each individual and you were more in touch with your animal nature and its impulses toward self reliance.

J: Going back to our tribal roots yet retaining the maturation of our egoic consciousness?

DM: Yes, exactly. The evolution of your egoic consciousness has been as natural as a seed growing into a plant. Yet, the egoic consciousness has also developed a falseness that to the degree it goes unconstructed leads to so many of the issues that your species has now and that we’ve been talking about.

J: I offered that there is an important emotional and spiritual aspect to self reliance. Deconstructing the false self and healing our emotional bodies is what I feel is the emotional aspect. And, you’ve already mentioned, surrender to and connection with you as the spiritual one.

DM: Deconstructing of the false self can happen to some degree by choice through the process you offer with SoulFullHeart and by other practices. It also happens when the construct falls away and the false self is ‘forced’ to give up the things it has become attached to.

J: I feel like that is a lot to digest for today, Mother. I look forward to connecting with you again soon. I feel that I need to and that others do as well.

DM: Yes, Jillian. I have more to say, of course, but I respect your need to breathe and digest. Until next time, my daughter.

J: Yes, until next time.

Jillian Vriend is co-creator of SoulFullHeart Way Of Life and currently planning an exodus to an ecovillage in mexico.

Related Writing:

60 Days With Divine Mother: Message Of Real Love From A Feminine God

Tribulation: A Novel Inviting Us To Feel Life After Global Collapse

“A man lives who hears the the song of the red-tailed hawk and flies with it; A man lives who begins and ends each day with his new family and needs no other people; A man lives, who learns something new about the ground he walks every day, and needs no other place; A man lives who knows he is in the world not on it, a part of it not in charge of it, with many brethren of all kinds, and has no right to take more than he needs.” From Tribulation

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By Jillian Vriend

Information about the inevitable global collapse of our short-sighted, technology- and cheap-fossil-fuel-dependent world is usually presented from a mental perspective and from an energy of “proving” that intense changes are coming and when they might be coming. Most of what is out there is mental analysis presented by mostly men who seem to be overly dedicated to researching thoroughly because what they are offering is admittedly to a stubborn audience in deep denial. They use logic and reasoning to try to pierce this denial and to wake up, first and foremost, a person’s awareness to what is happening. While this initial awakening is crucial, I’ve felt something missing from what I’ve digested recently from these mostly male sources and ‘experts’ on collapse.

What I feel is missing from the collapse picture and from our world in a big way is feeling, intuition, compassion, vision, surrender, and connection to a bigger context. Basically, a feminine energy (in both men and women) that can hold and respond to what is happening and what will happen from the heart rather than just from the head. I feel called to provide some of that energy through my connection with the Divine Mother, as I’ve done in previous conversations that I’ve shared on this blog. I also felt compelled to share images from our world with only music as backdrop to invite the heart to digest what is happening rather than just the mind. I feel strongly that is our individual capacity to emotionally digest what is coming that will become the most valuable currency in the future. I feel that survival and practical skills in combination with emotional maturity will offer the most grounded chance for those awakening to this reality.

One of the most difficult things for people to imagine is what the collapse will be like and how it might feel to actually live through it. This is where I feel that fiction writing can be very helpful as it sparks the imagination (connected to our third eye/visionary access) and elicits our emotional reactions in ways that just being presented the “facts” of what is happening cannot. Telling and hearing stories has been an important aspect of human consciousness throughout our history…we’ve moved from sharing orally around the fire to spending millions on block buster movies. Most of these stories feel like they feed our denial, keep us asleep, and allow us to act courageously in a vicarious way. Most of these stories bear little resemblance to most our lives and purposely avoid reflecting the subconscious (and sometimes conscious) misery and suffering that so many people feel. Most of these stories act as drugs, whether to keep us from feeling or to drop us into feeling as a way to off gas our pain without actually connecting it to ourselves.

Sometimes, though, a story comes along that invites us to feel ourselves and our lives. It invites us to feel the very real possibilities of our future and offers scenarios that don’t feel foreign so much as scarily familiar. Tribulation by Thomas Lewis offers such a story. Rather than offering a dystopian picture of a world that has been cranked up to extremes so we don’t feel too disturbed by it (like Hunger Games series, 1984, Battlestar Gallatica, the Divergent series, The Stand, Planet Of The Apes, etc.), this book remains firmly grounded in what is not only possible but is very likely. The author has obviously researched extensively our fossil fuel dependency, as one example, and then he imagines what will happen to modern society when the tankers can’t deliver, when the food can’t be delivered by truck, when the political systems have become irreversibly corrupt from preserving relationships with middle eastern, oil-rich countries , when the wars escalate, when the economy based on fiat currency collapses. It’s easy to imagine the hoarding, the looting, the shooting and yet can be difficult for us to feel what that would be like to live through. We need characters, like reluctant leader William and his collapse-seeing son Bill, and the others who live out the first, very messy and painful phase of collapse on a sustainable farm, to project our hopes and our fears on to.

The author provides us a picture of what it will take to survive: fertile land in a remote location, a source of clean drinking water, security systems in place (including hand guns), a community of people that you can trust with your life, gardens, farm animals. Many people offer this picture of ecovillage and intentional community living as a crucial step, but it is much more compelling to journey with these characters as they actually live this life, giving up most of the modern conveniences that have allowed for easy food, easy water, and (for most of us) easy lives. And their journey is not just about adjusting to daily living in this new, very physical reality, it is also about these characters letting go of who they were before the collapse and arising into who they become afterwards.

We feel that it is the collapse of the self image built up by the false self that will be the most difficult aspect for most people. So much investment in money earning, mortgages, professional careers, attaining the next “toy”…this investment will be impossible for many people to let go of even when life “forces” them to let go. We have offered with SoulFullHeart for two years now and been on our own journey for over ten years of deconstruction of the false self and its domains of control and strategy. We have let go of jobs, toxic family relationships, even previously revered spiritual groups…anything that did not seem to serve our arising authentic self and deconstruction of our false self. Reading this book confirmed these decisions as the de-construction process for us might be that much easier to bear when it happens. We have surrendered outcomes to the Divine and try to align our desires with the bigger context of our souls and Divine guidance. We have decided to leave Canada in the next few months and find a place that establish a conscious community that will feel like our “ark”, most likely in Mexico. A place where we can plant our seeds of heart and soul offering, growing not just the food we need to survive but the way of life that brings us such growth and love. A place where we can draw others with like-hearted and minded sense of life to be in community with us.

There is such growing proof that a great death is coming and we are already in the middle of a painful contraction period, the likes of which have never been experienced by our species. But, I hold in my heart (as validated by reading this book) that there is a rebirth possible rising out of the ashes of our false investments. A rebirth that offers a lifestyle of simplicity, sustainability, connection with our environment, and, most importantly of all, love.

Actions And Consequences: Conversations With Divine Mother About Global Collapse


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It is my compassion and deep love for humanity, for my human children as you said, that urges me to do what must be done even if it means the destruction of you all. I do not WANT that, Jillian. But my desires are secondary to the free will sovereignty that you have all been gifted with. And, many humans DO want to die and DO NOT feel the consequences of killing other species, each other, or the living planet. I feel compassion for these humans entangled in social and cultural conditioning and weighed down by emotional and spiritual wounding. But THEY do not feel compassion for anyone else, themselves, or the planet. And there are consequences for living in this non-living, non-loving, fear-based, unconscious state.

Jillian: Hello, Mother. I feel a sense of urgency on this rainy day in June.

Divine Mother: Hello, Jillian. Yes…I can feel that in you. Digesting what you’ve been reading and learning recently?

J: I feel like I have so much to ask you about related to the very real threats to the survival of the human species..yet I know you won’t give me reassurances, false hope, or specific timelines.

DM: Ask me what is in your heart to ask, Jillian, and I’ll respond with what I feel you need even if it isn’t what you think you want.

J: Mother….is the human race doomed? Are we looking at near term extinction in the next decade or even the next few years?

DM: I feel your tears and pain as you ask me that question, Jillian. I feel your despair and compassion.

J: As much as I can be frustrated by the actions and choices of unconscious people, I feel pain at the suffering and loss coming to us as a consequence for our short sighted and false self-based actions.

DM: So, you do feel there will be consequences?

J: How can there not be? That’s how the natural world works. Cause and effect. We have lived blindly so long to this basic principal…drugged by access to easy oil, easy food, easy water, easy shelter, easy life. Even as everything being easy has still made most people miserable.

DM: Cause and effect is the rule of nature. Yet as humans have removed themselves from nature by seeking to dominate it, they have delayed the consequences of their actions. Delayed, yet not ceased.

J: One of the consequences of our actions could be the end of our species.

DM: Yes. And up to 200 species are dying every day because of the actions of humans. Other species and the earth are bearing the brunt of the consequences of human action or inaction. Yet, nature seeks balance and it will find it.

J: It is difficult to imagine how that balance won’t mean adjusting the overpopulation of this planet by the reduction of many people. I feel your lack of sentimentality as we talk about this, Mother. I feel how much you love your human children, so why does your heart feel almost cold to me as we talk about this?

DM: This is my dark mother face, Jillian. The energy of doing what must be done even if it is painful in order to put things back in balance. The energy of tornadoes, storms, volcanoes. Even diseases. That which is out of balance must be righted again.

J: And yet I’ve experienced the compassion of your heart, the vastness of it, for several years now.

DM: It is my compassion and deep love for humanity, for my human children as you said, that urges me to do what must be done even if it means the destruction of you all. I do not WANT that, Jillian. But my desires are secondary to the free will sovereignty that you have all been gifted with. And, many humans DO want to die and DO NOT feel the consequences of killing other species, each other, or the living planet. I feel compassion for these humans entangled in social and cultural conditioning and weighed down by emotional and spiritual wounding. But THEY do not feel compassion for anyone else, themselves, or the planet. And there are consequences for living in this non-living, unconscious state.

J: I just feel like crying, Mother. I feel what you mean and I accept it but it just breaks my heart.

DM: As it breaks mine, Jillian. Sometimes we need to break our hearts open in order to truly let in and be with love.

J: And, I feel like I want guidance somehow around how to be with this heartbreak and what service looks like now for me and for SoulFullHeart. I feel the ash in the air, burning down of the structure that we created the last two years of sessions, space holding, group weekends, charging a fee for sessions…all of it feels like it is irrelevant compared to the very real possibilities of global collapse that we are feeling together.

DM: You created a form to contain the love and service that you had to offer others. The form is burning away, yes, in a necessary way. But the desire to serve love remains, yes?

J: Yes. I just don’t know the form yet.

DM: Form follows desire. Your desire is leading you to explore your world, to adventure to somewhere warmer and simplier in culture. Follow that and I will bring you connections, synchronicity…I will bring you opportunities to serve.

J: They just might not be in the way or structure that I am used to?

DM: Exactly. As you digest the ash in the air reality of your modern world, you are letting go of your attachments…the few that you had that is. This is the gift of ‘getting real’. Not for what it informs your mind, but for what it enlivens in your heart.

J: I so feel that gift even as it has been difficult to let in what we are facing as a species. Yet, my experience has been over the last ten years that ‘getting real’ is always preferable to deluding yourself, even if it hurts a lot at times.

DM: I feel the flame of your heart and soul being stripped of its form, Jillian, and therefore able to shine all the more brightly as a beacon to those ready to see it. I see it able to catalyze and penetrate more deeply what is authentic and vulnerable in others.

J: I think I feel what you mean, Mother. It’s what I want to be.

DM: And so it is what you are becoming. And it is the invitation from me to all my sacred human children….that their raw essence is one of love. Many of them have too much form, too many layers, to strip away this life and maybe will experience this in another life or even in another dimension where planets like Earth also exist.

J: What is the biggest thing that most people need to strip away, Mother?

DM: There are many answers to that question, Jillian. But I prefer first to ask rather than tell. What was the biggest thing you’ve had to strip away?

J: The first thing that comes to mind is to strip away the conditioning I’ve received. Social conditioning, family conditioning, relationship conditioning, western world conditioning, religious conditioning, mainstream psychology and spirituality conditioning, nutritional conditioning..and on and on. I’ve been in a process of deconstructing my mainstream conditioning and then experiencing what arises from my authentic essence instead to replace it. Lately, it’s been about stripping away conditioning related to unsustainable lifestyle choices.

DM: That is a major de-conditioning process, Jillian. It doesn’t feel like many souls signed up for that. But for those who did and feel an ache to experience how it feels when the authentic arises after deconstructing the false, then I would offer that the biggest stripping away would be of the denial and blocks that keep them from healing their own hearts and souls. Whatever conditioning they received that this was not important would need to be let go and a priority made of their own healing. And an urgent priority at that…

J: Yes, and this going inside ourselves eventually leads to a stripping away of social and relationship conditioning, which I feel is a huge block on the expression of our authenticity. For example, today is father’s day and it just about makes me choke to feel the congestion of duty, obligation, inauthenticity, and nonvulnerability that categorize most relationships that people have with their fathers. Yet, we all receive conditioning around this ‘holiday’ and feel a pressure to reach out or spend time with or appreciate our fathers. The same is true on mother’s day, birthdays, christmas, anniversaries. It is difficult to feel love on days such as these. Days that aren’t real anyway but been denoted as such mostly be greeting card companies. I have said no to most of this for years now.

DM: And so stripping away involves saying no to what most people hold as their reality.

J: A reality that is in general making most of them miserable and unhappy. A reality that creates a slave race out of humans because the conditioning we receive and pass on creates inauthentic actions and choices that lead to more emotional wounding. The conditioning creates toxic and dead relationships, especially marriages. I feel like the topic of dead marriages is a good one for another day though.

DM: Yes, that is fine. Jillian…..I just want you to feel that even during this time of great turning and death, it is being held with love. Death is necessary to free up love.

J: Even if there are no humans left to experience it?

DM: Yes. It is the most real thing there is and your world has been built on a false foundation of fear. My desire is for that foundation to crumble and maybe some of my human children will survive that crumbling. I do not know. But, what I do know is that love will survive. Even if it only exists in the future between the molecules of water and the sun or the blades of grass and the insect crawling on them.

J: Ok, deep breath…going to go digest this now and I do feel your love, Mother, and it does hold the heartbreak, even if it doesn’t alleviate it.

DM: Good, Jillian. Good to go feel now.

Jillian Vriend is co-creator of SoulFullHeart, parts work facilitator, author of a  book about connecting with the Divine Mother, on this blog, and sacred humanity-Divine Feminine teacher-student. 

Related Writing:

60 Days With Divine Mother: Message Of Real Love From A Feminine God