Vulnerability is the portal to our heart`s longing and truest self. Our most prized gift. In our `time` here in this dimension many aspects of our soul have been through many painful experiences, as well as the conscious experiences we have had in this life. It is not a fault for us to have a shield and need to suppress something that feels scary. All this happens many times on a subconscious and unconscious level. We created a protection because we know how valuable we are. How amazing we are. It was authorized by our Higher Self. But then the time comes when Love begins to make its way to our doorstep in whatever fashion that may be. Through pain, challenge, pleasure, or resistance. We begin to feel the dissonance inside us viscerally and the only really true relief is through letting your Truth be exposed.
I had deep tears today as I am feeling Love wanting to enter my field and upend all that a part of me has been clinging onto to resist the power of its immense Blessing. I could feel in one moment all the ways in which I, and my soul aspects, have built walls to keep me from risking and letting spirit lead me to this sacred union. I don`t judge this. I used to. Today was a deluge that comes from letting that authentic feeling of remorse that comes and showers you with all the love you can possibly let in. It is a mixture of pleasure and pain.
There is a reason for the invulnerability and a consequence. The longer we suppress what truly scares us the harder it can be to feel. However, I have come to believe it happens when it is supposed to happen. To this part of us, there is no good time to feel our vulnerability and fear. I have been through many phases of this facing hard truths and feeling fears. It is a spiral that continues to send us all the healing we need as we need it. One layer of healing brings us to another layer of shadow until we are becoming more and more in tune with our most authentic self. It is a sacred process that cannot be ignored in my heart.
I feel this area of vulnerability is a huge part of the collective male experience. Different men have different levels and comfortability with vulnerability. There are numerous reasons for it, but ultimately we fear our own power and the unworthiness that covers over it. This is the Age of the Vulnerable Man. It is time for us to heal our biggest pains so we can enter this Golden Earth that is NOW. I feel a veil lifted off of me from my tears, but I am not `done`. I have more to continue to feel as Love continues its dance with me. I am okay with this. I honor this. I feel its sacred balm and alchemical manifestations. Or WOMANifestations when it comes to drawing romance.
So in the end, I could feel the Divine telling me that ascension is not really all about what you know, but it is about what you feel. It is simply about letting in Love in its most purest and unfettered glory. Simply stated not so simply surrendered to. Being vulnerable with ourselves and with each other is the only way to get to the heart of what we were truly meant to be. To have someone you can trust to hold that space for it is one the most intimate experiences you can have outside of romance. With each touchstone movement, a new wave of self-love comes in and expands my heart to serve those who are in a space of needing healing. It is what I am here to BE and serve.
Gabriel Heartman is a teacher, facilitator, energy healer, writer, poet, and heartist with the SoulFullHeart Way of Life. You can learn more about him at www.soulfullheartwayoflife.com