Harvesting The Fruitful Darkness Into Love

The last few days have been quite a slug for me as I have been revisited by an energy that has ebbed and flowed in my field since I was in my early 20s. It is a very despairing energy that can be triggered in many ways, most notably in relationship to 3D money needs and intimacy.

I have felt both a masculine and a feminine energy in that despair. A feeling of not feeling like things are ever going to get off the ground and into abundance and flow. A feeling that I am not deserving or worthy of a lofty and joyous place. A seemingly inescapable condition of self-judgement and criticism. It is like a rolling snowball downhill that expands as gravity has its way.

This energy in me calls itself DC which stands for Dark Cloud or Don’t Care. It is a primordial energy that is quite ancient and collective. It lives in a very dark world yet in that darkness there is a deep need to be felt and heard even if it doesn’t admit to it. Forging a relationship to it helps to create the space for compassion and love to enter the space even as it feels hard to do so.

I have admittedly given it way too much power in my life. It has been a work in progress and is much different than it used to be. I have come to know this as an aspect of my soul but I needed some external reflection to really let that into my heart. This is a fusion that we know we are in but just need an outside mirror and lever to tilt it back into the Higher Heart and Consciousness.

I feel how these ongoing energies are ramping up that which is still embedded in our soul and is taking up residence in our bodies. It leaves little vacancy for our Higher Self to come into the space until we chose to relate to it on a personal level.

In our continued journey to wholeness, we are also healing the collective and that can be quite a chore. It is a process of personalizing the energy that takes it out of that well and into your own heart space. It loses some of its intensity and density and becomes more open to feeling in its own time.

Today’s Harvest Full Moon is another opportunity to harvest the fruit from this darkness and finally get to the root of what keeps us from truly embodying all that we are meant and desire to be. We get to do this together through our sharing and our connection. We may even seek the space of another to help transmute it back into Love from whence it came, it just has forgotten and felt forsaken.

******

Gabriel Heartman is an emoto-spiritual men’s and women’s facilitator, energy healer, writer, poet, and heartist with the SoulFullHeart Way of Life.  Visit https://www.soulfullheartwayoflife.com for more information about space holding sessions, group calls, videos, community, etc. 

Visit our website to offer a money donation to support our offerings at https://www.soulfullheartwayoflife/donations.

 

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Becoming The Author Of Your Own Story

By Raphael Awen

When you are no longer controlled by outside forces, you are the author, possessing the author-ity for what your life is about.

Becoming the Sovereign of your own life in this way is a scary proposition as it leaves us completely responsible for own lives, leaving us the challenge of owning all of our lives – all that’s in our lives, and all of our lifetimes.

There’s no one to blame. There’s no circumstance to point the finger at; no lot in life, that doesn’t originate in you.

The idea of having whatever you want is only novel and exciting until you realize that’s what actually been going on this whole time. The challenge is coming to terms with your authorship, deciding the story that you actually want; deciding and negotiating between the parts of you that want different things.

You are not your circumstances. You are not your relationships. You are not your job. You are not your bank balance. You are not even your health. You created all of that, but you are not that.

You are the creator.

Maybe like me, you set your sights on healing your anxiety or your depression. You did that, only to realize this was much to small a goal for the Sovereign you actually are. No longer being in the depths of anxiety or depression is nice, but that alone can’t fill the expansive sails of your being.

You are called to experience yourself in continual curiosity and childlike wonder and learning. You are ever called to more.

What does your more look like? What is wanting to mature and manifest in your life, in your world, in your magical story?

What have parts of you been afraid of, in order to enact the changes that you know are ripening in your story?

How can you lovingly reconcile and negotiate these inner differences?

*****

Raphael Awen is co-creator, teacher, and facilitator of the SoulFullHeart Way Of Life.  Visit soulfullheartwayoflife.com for more information about sessions, events, videos, etc. Visit our donations page to offer a monthly or one time money donation to support our offerings.

The Door To Our Inner Garden

By Raphael Awen

And for how long we longed after some door external to us to find our magic, our light, our sparkle, when the door was in our own inner garden all along. 

If this is true, then what seems to predispose us all to look outward or to an other?

We have been convinced that the self is ‘selfish,’ an inherently bad word and a very bad thing, when in truth until you become truly and deeply selfish, youcan in no wise inherit the kingdom of God, for this kingdom and queendom is inside you.

To be fully selfish is to do and be what brings you the fullest and deepest pleasure. How could that not be to the fullest and deepest pleasure of all of life and every living thing around you.

Shortchanging yourself is shortchanging the world and everyone around you. 

Your problem isn’t that you are self centred, it is that you are not centred in yourself enough to the true degree and depths of that which you really are and with what you really want. 

Give up the pretence that you have no self-interest for when in fact, as a self, that is all you have.

Show me your most noble self-less act, and then show me how you are not deriving a personal return from it. 

Until we reconcile this inside of ourselves, the door to our own inner garden of our magic remains sealed.

How could it be any different?

*****

Raphael Awen is co-creator, teacher, and facilitator of the SoulFullHeart Way Of Life.  Visit soulfullheartwayoflife.com for more information about sessions, events, videos, etc. Visit our donations page to offer a monthly or one time money donation to support our offerings.

From Casket To Cradle: Necessary Death & Rebirth During Ascension

By Jelelle Awen

Has the death aspect of Ascension been validated enough? The necessary process of letting go of the old, the dying, and the mourning that accompanies it? I feel this aspect of the process deeply in others and in myself as I have experienced it so often over the years/lifetimes, in my own Metasoul, and as connected to the Universal soul/Divine Source too.

Rebirth CANNOT happen without death, as nature and Gaia show us and remind us. Just wanting the rebirth and the Ascension without the necessary death process is to limit the infinite possibilities that TRUE transmutation brings.

More and more over the years, souls (and their 3D selves) are just needing to share with me that they definitely feel like their worlds are collapsing, their lives are changing so much, and it feels like they are dying. And, I feel this with a deep compassion as the Divine has offered to me so many times….not able to take the pain away, yet validating that YES, this is the process and you’ll ultimately be OK. In a very significant way, your world is collapsing…..the 3D world anyway and the 3D self that has formed in so many fragmented aspects is too letting go, unanchoring, and this feels hugely like dying as the energy transmutes to a higher frequency.

What has previously been and felt alive….what has been kNOwn as a life…..is going through death throes as the soul’s higher frequencies come through, shine through, and rumble through. These parts of you feel sad and lonely and like no one else in your world ‘gets it’ because, in many ways, they don’t. Those people so beloved to you in your 3D life (and even to your 4D transitional self too) are suddenly not able to resonate on the same ground as you. You are speaking now a foreign language and are forgetting the one you used to be so fluent in. You are compelled to attend inner funeral services that they don’t see the reason for. You are becoming a ghost to them even as you become so much clearer to yourself.

I am shown by the 3D self (and its ego) scenes of rubble falling from previously solid ceilings…..ash thick in the previously clear air…..blazes lit to clear the excess away. The 3D self wants to be felt in all this letting go and change and it needs to be. You can provide so much comfort to this part of you as it falls and tumbles and loses so much. As your 3D self is negotiated with and felt by you, it can so much more easily let go with much less resistance and fear. More love can flow within your BEing to hold space for this process!!

The beautiful thing that seems to be happening right now is that the gap between the dying and the rebirth is shorter and, in some cases, happening in the same now. The old is being let go while the new is coming in and there is very little ‘time’ left then to mourn. This also seems to be true the more 5D self or higher self coming into your body that you have within you and the more you have surrendered to the death and rebirth process and already let go of so much of what needed to be let go of.

Then, trust grows inside of all of your parts that whatever is being released will be replaced by something better that is based in love and reflection of your soul and service of love here!

love,

Jelelle

~

This is a teaching and guided meditation with SoulFullHeart Facilitator Gabriel Heartman and me offering more about the death/rebirth cycle during awakening and a guided meditation to meet your ‘dying’ self and your ‘newborn’ Divine self:

Join Raphael and me next Saturday, September 14th for our monthly group transmission over zoom, starting at 10:00am PDT. We will teach about and guide you in a meditative space in which you can connect to your Gatekeeper aspect, visit the Lower 4D Matrix, begin the process of unplugging from it, and learn how to open up portals to other lifetimes/timelines that need karmic healing. More info to join us for a $15 CAD donation here live or to receive the recording afterwards: soulfullheartwayoflife.com/grouptransmissions

You can purchase here at our shop: soulfullheartwayoflife.com/shop

Or via paypal here (just make a note what you are purchasing and make sure your email is current): paypal.me/jelelleawen

Jelelle Awen is Co-Creator/Teacher/Group Facilitator/Ambassador of SoulFullHeart Way Of Life, a healing process and paradigm offering New Gaia Ascension frequencies to transmute trauma into love on emotional/spiritual/physical levels. For more information about 1:1 individual sessions with SoulFullHeart Facilitators, virtual group transmissions, four day gatherings in Victoria, BC, writings/books, and videos, visit soulfullheartwayoflife.com.

Falling IN Love

Photo by Everton Vila on Unsplash

By Raianna Shai

In the past few weeks I have been trying to find the space and time to write a blog post, finding that I have struggled to “force” something profound and meaningful out of me when sometimes just living is as profound as you need to be in any moment. I have so much desire to serve love to others and to share what I learn on my awakening journey. Even now, I have many ideas of what I could write about but the words aren’t flowing as easily as they have in the past.

So as I sit here with an open heart, energy and time, I decided just to write about where I am currently in my life. That is what’s most authentic and flows from my heart with ease.

Right now I am falling in love. With myself, with other, with my life and family. I am falling in love inside and outside. I am growing and changing and facing my fears as much as I possibly can to continue letting in all of this love.

My inner process has been focused on a feminine and masculine part of me who are also learning to fall in love. They both have desires, needs, boundaries and fears. My feminine part, who I am calling Shai, is emotional and passionate and a true romantic at heart. My masculine part, named Michael, is discerning, intelligent and has a gift of holding 3D tasks. Together, they are balanced and full of love. Apart, they are opposite forces working against one another creating fear, anxiety and projection onto others.

Because of the abundance of goodness in my life right now, I have been focusing on these two parts in order to be able to continue letting it all in. It’s easy for parts to get scared when things are going well. In a dimension where things tend to “go wrong”, we can make predictions ahead of time of what may not work or what we might lose. In that, we lose the moment. We lose what we have in the present and we don’t get everything out of it that we could.

I’m working on not expecting the worse. On not bracing myself for the impact of something bad. But first, I feel the parts that do expect the worst and discover why that is. The more that Shai and Michael vulnerably share their fears with me, the more they will fall in love and fall in tandem with one another. That’s when their gifts can shine and that love can be shared with others.

We talk about inner sacred union a lot for a reason. It’s so important to start within. To grow the glow of love so brightly that it shines through every pore and into those around you.

*****

I found this poem from almost two years ago that I thought was fitting for this! It’s from my masculine too my feminine:

I always thought I was different than the other men

More sensitive

More emotional

More mature

 

I thought I was protecting you from the other men

Giving you edges

Hiding your feelings

Numbing your reactions

 

I thought you’d be hurt by the other men

They would crack you into pieces

They would scratch your porcelain skin

They would break your fragile heart

 

But now I see your strength as a woman

Your compassion

Your empathetic prowess

Your stillness and energy, both

 

I thought I could hide you as a woman

Under formless clothing

Under quick-witted comebacks

Under disinterest in romance

 

Maybe now I can support you as a woman

Become the mind to your heart

Become the here to your now

Become the pot to your plant

 

I’m not meant to be your guard,

But instead your partner

Your partner in this dance

Few know the steps to

 

Where our rhythms match,

Our hearts unite

And our souls release the energy

Of every star in the nighttime sky

*****

Raianna Shai is a SoulFullHeart facilitant and social media maven for SoulFullHeart Way Of Life. Visit  www.soulfullheartwayoflife.com for more information about sessions, events, videos, community, etc. Return LOVE in money form: https://www.paypal.me/supportsoulfullheart or visit our Patreon page to become a monthly supporter: https://www.patreon.com/soulfullheart.

Choosing To Forget

By Raphael Awen

You’ve chosen to forget.

The desire, the rate and pace, the content of what and how you remember is also a choice.

A dynamic and powerful part of you has been assigned to hold this tension of what needs to remain in the forgotten category and what is safe and timely to be remembered. We could call this part of you, your Gatekeeper, the guardian of the necessary veil who enabled and afforded you to inhabit this desired third dimensional school without imploding.

It’s been a bit of a family joke for those that know me to have a little fun with my forgetfulness around movies. I’ve tended strongly to forget titles, story lines, and often only recall a movie I’m watching for the second time part way into the movie. It’s not all movies as some story lines made profound impacts and memories. Other movies, however, who people around me found interesting enough, I often even fell asleep to while watching.

I asked my Gatekeeper whose name is Rhodes about this, this morning and immediately my awareness expanded out that this forgetfulness of story has directly to do with the strength of the veil that I chose and needed this life. Even with Rhodes himself along with stories of my Metasoul aspects and their timelines, I’ve had trouble recalling some time following after having deep and profound processes of remembering. It would simply get swallowed back up into a sea of a kind of a sea of forgetfulness.

Rhodes communicated today that the strength of other timelines stories needed to have sufficient veil in order that the purpose of this timeline be protected. As I’m awakening, however, this movie amnesia, whether it’s about movies or about my soul history, or even this life history, is making other parts of me feel self conscious. They want to get on with remembering. Remembering, they feel is the answer to what is ached for, and the answer to where parts of me feel, I and they still experience suffering.

I’m told that forgetting is a kind of suffering, a burden to bear, if you will, that we all chose, collectively and individually as a service to the goals and desires of love. Forgetting is not static however. Forgetting is for the purpose of remembering. We hid our own Easter eggs and we wrapped our own Christmas presents. We forgot in order to remember.

I’m told that remembering is ’to be returned to being a member’, after surrendering to a kind of dismemberment from love. The forgetting had its own pains as does remembering, like blood returning to a limb that fell asleep.

I’m told that the whole purpose of forgetting and remembering was to expand love from its original perfect/imperfect state. Love itself wanted to be noticed and to be revered. It birthed duality as a place to get noticed, seen and appreciated.

Getting to know and feel this magical part of you who’s been your personal Gatekeeper is now your opportunity to negotiate the rate and pace and content of your awakening as you lovingly guide yourself and other parts of yourself through this epic journey.

Story lines from other timelines in your Metasoul await you to be felt and seen and transmuted into love. Karma itself also wants to be transmuted from the expectation of pain to the expectation of bounty and love.

Raphael Awen is co-creator, teacher, and facilitator of the SoulFullHeart Way Of Life.  Visit soulfullheartwayoflife.com for more information about sessions, events, videos, etc. Visit our donations page to offer a monthly or one time money donation to support our offerings.

Evolution Through INvolution

By Gabriel Heartman

“Emerging from the cocoon, you are a new creature and everything is different. There are no laws. There are just fossilized habits. And the whole journey is crossing these habits – locating them and realizing the barrier to your development is also the lever. Medicine and biology have their codified barriers, which are all levers of sorts. If there is a wall, there is also the other side of the wall. To find the wall, to know it is a wall, is to be able to cross it.”

-Henri Monfort from Pranic Nourishment: Another Path To A Spiritual Life

While this quote is specific to our biology and its preconceived limitations in regards to living a life of pranic nourishment, I can also replace ‘medicine and biology’ with almost any 3D structure. Politics, government, education, economics, society, etc. and come to an awareness that our evolution comes through our own personal INvolution.

That inner evolution comes when we come to and cross these ‘Rubicons’ of growth and consciousness. Parts stare at the edge of an abyss or the perceived infinite height or depth of a wall, and come to choice point. Do I keep this structure in place or do I choose to connect with my soul at a higher and deeper level to guide me with Grace across, and through, these ‘barriers’?

When choosing Soul, the levers open up and we are invited to cross over.

This is a death and a rebirth. This glorified and rarified moment we chose to embody Life at a level once imperceptible to our awareness. It becomes the New Now. The Norm. The ground we now walk upon that offers more than physical death and taxes.

You are freeing yourself from one world, and entering a new one.

The ‘rules’ have shifted and now life/consciousness takes on a whole different trajectory than the one it used to be beholden to. This does not come without a price of feeling the pain of that. But with each felt step and integration, we walk the road back to our essence as Love, Light, and Magic.

Weightless, fearless, and free.

*****

Gabriel Heartman is an emoto-spiritual men’s and women’s facilitator, energy healer, writer, poet, and heartist with the SoulFullHeart Way of Life.  Visit https://www.soulfullheartwayoflife.com for more information about space holding sessions, group calls, videos, community, etc. 

Visit our website to offer a money donation to support our offerings at https://www.soulfullheartwayoflife/donations.

From Those Who Watch Over Us: A Poem

by Kalayna Solais

It’s okay if you don’t remember.
We aren’t going to leave you.

It’s okay if you don’t know.

There’s not much to know, just to experience over and over again until experience turns into the page love is written on, not the words of love themselves.

It’s okay if you don’t know who you are.

We don’t care how many carousels you ride, how many spins you take, you will still have your essence in the end.

In the end, the only path that matters, is the path you chose in every moment. And no… we don’t care how you were or weren’t, just how your experiments end. The inconclusive conclusions you come to along your way back to love.

Love.

The only Ground Zero.

The only ground from where you rose, and the only ground on which you fall.
The place where seeds are scattered, and growth happens no matter what.
Yes. All else is an illusion.

But…

It’s the illusion you need.

That holographic something isn’t nothing. It’s the most important thing right now right now and right now.

So… walk, run, fly, dream, make love, make war, make peace, get messy, clean up, climb up, and fall down.

Your sacredness won’t break, for it is not porcelain.

Your birthright to live into all realities remains intact.

Here we sit.
Here we watch. Here we wait for you to remember that the path is love, the game is love, and the light, dark, hard, easy stories are the love you are learning and remembering that you are.

❤️

***

Kalayna Solais is a SoulFullHeart Facilitator for women, energy healer, soul scribe, and poetess.  Visit https://www.soulfullheartwayoflife.com for more information about space holding sessions, group calls, videos, community, etc. Visit our Patreon page to offer a money donation to support our offerings at https://www.patreon.com/soulfullheart.

Class Action Love Suit

By Raphael Awen

Anxiety and depression coming up are at first seen to be related to how one feels about this life.

Looking deeper and feeling deeper, one can see how these feelings also stem from the Metasoul – Mirroring aspects of our wider self, in other timelines often holding karmic binds, an expectation of things going wrong.

Karma’s whole point was to bring us to remorse and reconciliation from this polarized extremity and duality of living as if one could harm an other and reframe from harming self.

Feeling the deeper soul’s sorry, one moves the karmic binds from a kind of class action law suit arrayed against you, to a kind of class action love suit, where victim and perpetrator recreate and rewrite the story to one of deep love through the inseparable bond of karma.

I felt this while feeling my Atlantean Metasoul aspect today, who I’ve come to know as Mordecai. At first, it was simply a heightened energy of fearing outcomes. I even had a moment of ‘for no reason’, fearing the car breaking down while driving yesterday, along with other feelings of circumstances turning negative. I was able to feel into this karmic expectation backlash that this was about the reality that Mordecai created for himself, and to feel this all with him and create a new unfolding timeline of deep remorse, asking forgiveness, receiving it and now allowing for the Karmic binds to be transformed into alchemical Karmic love binds.

Raphael Awen is co-creator, teacher, and facilitator of the SoulFullHeart Way Of Life.  Visit soulfullheartwayoflife.com for more information about sessions, events, videos, etc. Visit our donations page to offer a monthly or one time money donation to support our offerings.

Your Great Awakening And Disclosure Are At Hand

The recent suicide by Jeffery Epstein is rumbling throughout the collective and is casting a huge spotlight on nature of this case and the ‘powers that be’. For many, this is not a huge surprise considering the magnitude of what he represented. It is right there for all of us to see.

No, there is no particular evidence to suggest otherwise, though I am sure there are some making their way. As we learned from the JFK assassination, 9/11, and numerous other events, this will be muddied before it will be made clear. That can be guaranteed.

However, the collective can ‘feel’ it. They can sense it. It has ‘no duh’ written all over it. We are being messaged from the ruling class that they still have control, even as they are losing it. So now there will be a show. An extravaganza with all the makings of a daytime drama we will not be able to peel ourselves from. Huge stores of time, money, and energy will be expended from all sides. The crowd will gather at the coliseum with torches, pitchforks, and cellphones in hand.

While we are gathered, the game continues. The divide widens. Yet, it can be different. We can take this as a sign of the times. Something is rumbling. It is coming down. As the pieces fall there is going to be damage. There will be a chaotic feeling in the air as the shadow plays itself out in full form.

To move through it, we must move with it. It is through coming into our own shadow and feeling where the disclosure within still lies. What you can see, feel, and relate to within you with Love and Compassion will be the tools you apply in the Great Awakening. The time when what the collective has been asleep to and unconsciously complacent in comes to the forefront.

We all have a part to play in this. Some came to do the work of exposing the details. Others are here to be exposed, and many are here to be the balm after the bomb. If you are one of those, your mission, if you choose to take it, is to feel and know the real you. Not just the good, but the not-so-good. The wounded, the abuser, the controller, the ugly, the evil. They live in us as it lives ‘out there’.

Watch the events from a distance, but stay on course. Hold the Light into the Dark. As it shines brighter it causes the rumbles to happen faster but it is what you came here to do. To move out of the 4D paintrix and into the New 5D embodied God and Goddess you have always been. Let the reactions lead you within and then into this Divine frequency.

Your own Disclosure is at hand.

*****

Gabriel Heartman is an emoto-spiritual men’s and women’s facilitator, energy healer, writer, poet, and heartist with the SoulFullHeart Way of Life.  Visit https://www.soulfullheartwayoflife.com for more information about space holding sessions, group calls, videos, community, etc. 

Visit our website to offer a money donation to support our offerings at https://www.soulfullheartwayoflife/donations.