Today I Choose To Rise

Today

Today I choose differently

I choose to give back all that I have held

In the name of my unworth

I choose to give in to all that I am being invited to feel

In the name of my freedom from the Darkness

I choose to serve the Dark but not Be it

In the name of my arising leadership and purpose

I choose to no longer fear real love

But to open my heart to the One that is meant to spark its fire

Today I rise

I rise to the possibilities and the destinies

The clarities and vulnerabilities

Today I rise knowing that there is always more on its way

But this time I will be ready

To face it all with Love and the need to say No More

To the things that no longer serve me

Today I choose to rise

*****

Gabriel Heartman is an emoto-spiritual men’s and women’s facilitator, energy healer, writer, poet, and heartist with the SoulFullHeart Way of Life.  Visit https://www.soulfullheartwayoflife.com for more information about space holding sessions, group calls, videos, community, etc. 

Visit our website to offer a money donation to support our offerings at https://www.soulfullheartwayoflife/donations.

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Reflections From Our Interconnections: A Poem

by Kalayna Solais

Digging IN
my heart remembers
what it only can with you.
And what’s always true
is the plan of living
and the exquisite pain
of letting in
while also letting go.

Ecstatically
the heart opens and closes again
echoing thoughts and words within
the pulse of beating hearts
and timelines crossing timelines.

Instinctually
the forbidden mind
starts to mine
the experience of the heart
and integration of lined-up soul pieces
that flow and flee and double-back
into the next full circle
of healing miracles
within.

Reflections, ALL
move inside the current being
now seeing
what couldn’t be seen without them
moving into the heart space and out again
leaving me with more gain
than loss.

No matter the next
and next
and next
reflections and reactions and reactivations
the following places
pace in a dance
that races then recedes
in a way wild
uncontrolled
and absolutely
ALIVE.

~

Art by Rassouli

***

Kalayna Solais is a SoulFullHeart Facilitator for women, energy healer, soul scribe, and poetess.  Visit https://www.soulfullheartwayoflife.com for more information about space holding sessions, group calls, videos, community, etc.

Harvesting The Fruitful Darkness Into Love

The last few days have been quite a slug for me as I have been revisited by an energy that has ebbed and flowed in my field since I was in my early 20s. It is a very despairing energy that can be triggered in many ways, most notably in relationship to 3D money needs and intimacy.

I have felt both a masculine and a feminine energy in that despair. A feeling of not feeling like things are ever going to get off the ground and into abundance and flow. A feeling that I am not deserving or worthy of a lofty and joyous place. A seemingly inescapable condition of self-judgement and criticism. It is like a rolling snowball downhill that expands as gravity has its way.

This energy in me calls itself DC which stands for Dark Cloud or Don’t Care. It is a primordial energy that is quite ancient and collective. It lives in a very dark world yet in that darkness there is a deep need to be felt and heard even if it doesn’t admit to it. Forging a relationship to it helps to create the space for compassion and love to enter the space even as it feels hard to do so.

I have admittedly given it way too much power in my life. It has been a work in progress and is much different than it used to be. I have come to know this as an aspect of my soul but I needed some external reflection to really let that into my heart. This is a fusion that we know we are in but just need an outside mirror and lever to tilt it back into the Higher Heart and Consciousness.

I feel how these ongoing energies are ramping up that which is still embedded in our soul and is taking up residence in our bodies. It leaves little vacancy for our Higher Self to come into the space until we chose to relate to it on a personal level.

In our continued journey to wholeness, we are also healing the collective and that can be quite a chore. It is a process of personalizing the energy that takes it out of that well and into your own heart space. It loses some of its intensity and density and becomes more open to feeling in its own time.

Today’s Harvest Full Moon is another opportunity to harvest the fruit from this darkness and finally get to the root of what keeps us from truly embodying all that we are meant and desire to be. We get to do this together through our sharing and our connection. We may even seek the space of another to help transmute it back into Love from whence it came, it just has forgotten and felt forsaken.

******

Gabriel Heartman is an emoto-spiritual men’s and women’s facilitator, energy healer, writer, poet, and heartist with the SoulFullHeart Way of Life.  Visit https://www.soulfullheartwayoflife.com for more information about space holding sessions, group calls, videos, community, etc. 

Visit our website to offer a money donation to support our offerings at https://www.soulfullheartwayoflife/donations.

 

Becoming The Author Of Your Own Story

By Raphael Awen

When you are no longer controlled by outside forces, you are the author, possessing the author-ity for what your life is about.

Becoming the Sovereign of your own life in this way is a scary proposition as it leaves us completely responsible for own lives, leaving us the challenge of owning all of our lives – all that’s in our lives, and all of our lifetimes.

There’s no one to blame. There’s no circumstance to point the finger at; no lot in life, that doesn’t originate in you.

The idea of having whatever you want is only novel and exciting until you realize that’s what actually been going on this whole time. The challenge is coming to terms with your authorship, deciding the story that you actually want; deciding and negotiating between the parts of you that want different things.

You are not your circumstances. You are not your relationships. You are not your job. You are not your bank balance. You are not even your health. You created all of that, but you are not that.

You are the creator.

Maybe like me, you set your sights on healing your anxiety or your depression. You did that, only to realize this was much to small a goal for the Sovereign you actually are. No longer being in the depths of anxiety or depression is nice, but that alone can’t fill the expansive sails of your being.

You are called to experience yourself in continual curiosity and childlike wonder and learning. You are ever called to more.

What does your more look like? What is wanting to mature and manifest in your life, in your world, in your magical story?

What have parts of you been afraid of, in order to enact the changes that you know are ripening in your story?

How can you lovingly reconcile and negotiate these inner differences?

*****

Raphael Awen is co-creator, teacher, and facilitator of the SoulFullHeart Way Of Life.  Visit soulfullheartwayoflife.com for more information about sessions, events, videos, etc. Visit our donations page to offer a monthly or one time money donation to support our offerings.

Centering Yourself In Non-Resonant Situations Guided Meditation Video

by Kalayna Solais

With everything shifting lately in all of our lives in many ways, it feels good to offer this video and guided meditation I created to help centre through everything you might encounter and breathe through dissonant situations!
 
This video is a digestion of some pieces that have recently rumbled through in my own process in an effort to offer some of the important things I have been learning about navigating non-resonant situations and being a bridge for others yet having good boundaries and self-care too. It’s as much of an art form as it sounds like and the way you choose to navigate this for yourself will depend on your own parts and Metasoul aspects and what you are walking out personally.
 
About halfway through the video, I offer a guided meditation as a takeaway, something you can bring with you to work, social situations, etc where you may not always (if ever) feel ‘met’ where you are in the frequency you are most naturally at within yourself and your own process. This is meant to be a meditation to help you re-center, feel Divine love and guidance, and even to feel the presence of Star Family there with you, helping you ground back into yourself yet also offering next steps you may be able to soon take in order to help you move on from the dissonance around you and into more resonance in ALL areas of your life!
 
Much love! ❤
 
Oh, and btw, Raphael and Jelelle Awen will be offering their next online group transmission on Saturday Sept 14th: 4D Matrix/Karmic Healing Group Transmission — this group will help you feel through your own crucibles right now related to moving on from the 4D Matrix and healing some important karmic cycles/patterns that seem to keep playing out. Would love to see/feel you there! ❤

***

Kalayna Solais is a SoulFullHeart Facilitator for women, energy healer, soul scribe, and poetess.  Visit https://www.soulfullheartwayoflife.com for more information about space holding sessions, group calls, videos, community, etc.

The Door To Our Inner Garden

By Raphael Awen

And for how long we longed after some door external to us to find our magic, our light, our sparkle, when the door was in our own inner garden all along. 

If this is true, then what seems to predispose us all to look outward or to an other?

We have been convinced that the self is ‘selfish,’ an inherently bad word and a very bad thing, when in truth until you become truly and deeply selfish, youcan in no wise inherit the kingdom of God, for this kingdom and queendom is inside you.

To be fully selfish is to do and be what brings you the fullest and deepest pleasure. How could that not be to the fullest and deepest pleasure of all of life and every living thing around you.

Shortchanging yourself is shortchanging the world and everyone around you. 

Your problem isn’t that you are self centred, it is that you are not centred in yourself enough to the true degree and depths of that which you really are and with what you really want. 

Give up the pretence that you have no self-interest for when in fact, as a self, that is all you have.

Show me your most noble self-less act, and then show me how you are not deriving a personal return from it. 

Until we reconcile this inside of ourselves, the door to our own inner garden of our magic remains sealed.

How could it be any different?

*****

Raphael Awen is co-creator, teacher, and facilitator of the SoulFullHeart Way Of Life.  Visit soulfullheartwayoflife.com for more information about sessions, events, videos, etc. Visit our donations page to offer a monthly or one time money donation to support our offerings.

Falling IN Love

Photo by Everton Vila on Unsplash

By Raianna Shai

In the past few weeks I have been trying to find the space and time to write a blog post, finding that I have struggled to “force” something profound and meaningful out of me when sometimes just living is as profound as you need to be in any moment. I have so much desire to serve love to others and to share what I learn on my awakening journey. Even now, I have many ideas of what I could write about but the words aren’t flowing as easily as they have in the past.

So as I sit here with an open heart, energy and time, I decided just to write about where I am currently in my life. That is what’s most authentic and flows from my heart with ease.

Right now I am falling in love. With myself, with other, with my life and family. I am falling in love inside and outside. I am growing and changing and facing my fears as much as I possibly can to continue letting in all of this love.

My inner process has been focused on a feminine and masculine part of me who are also learning to fall in love. They both have desires, needs, boundaries and fears. My feminine part, who I am calling Shai, is emotional and passionate and a true romantic at heart. My masculine part, named Michael, is discerning, intelligent and has a gift of holding 3D tasks. Together, they are balanced and full of love. Apart, they are opposite forces working against one another creating fear, anxiety and projection onto others.

Because of the abundance of goodness in my life right now, I have been focusing on these two parts in order to be able to continue letting it all in. It’s easy for parts to get scared when things are going well. In a dimension where things tend to “go wrong”, we can make predictions ahead of time of what may not work or what we might lose. In that, we lose the moment. We lose what we have in the present and we don’t get everything out of it that we could.

I’m working on not expecting the worse. On not bracing myself for the impact of something bad. But first, I feel the parts that do expect the worst and discover why that is. The more that Shai and Michael vulnerably share their fears with me, the more they will fall in love and fall in tandem with one another. That’s when their gifts can shine and that love can be shared with others.

We talk about inner sacred union a lot for a reason. It’s so important to start within. To grow the glow of love so brightly that it shines through every pore and into those around you.

*****

I found this poem from almost two years ago that I thought was fitting for this! It’s from my masculine too my feminine:

I always thought I was different than the other men

More sensitive

More emotional

More mature

 

I thought I was protecting you from the other men

Giving you edges

Hiding your feelings

Numbing your reactions

 

I thought you’d be hurt by the other men

They would crack you into pieces

They would scratch your porcelain skin

They would break your fragile heart

 

But now I see your strength as a woman

Your compassion

Your empathetic prowess

Your stillness and energy, both

 

I thought I could hide you as a woman

Under formless clothing

Under quick-witted comebacks

Under disinterest in romance

 

Maybe now I can support you as a woman

Become the mind to your heart

Become the here to your now

Become the pot to your plant

 

I’m not meant to be your guard,

But instead your partner

Your partner in this dance

Few know the steps to

 

Where our rhythms match,

Our hearts unite

And our souls release the energy

Of every star in the nighttime sky

*****

Raianna Shai is a SoulFullHeart facilitant and social media maven for SoulFullHeart Way Of Life. Visit  www.soulfullheartwayoflife.com for more information about sessions, events, videos, community, etc. Return LOVE in money form: https://www.paypal.me/supportsoulfullheart or visit our Patreon page to become a monthly supporter: https://www.patreon.com/soulfullheart.

Choosing To Forget

By Raphael Awen

You’ve chosen to forget.

The desire, the rate and pace, the content of what and how you remember is also a choice.

A dynamic and powerful part of you has been assigned to hold this tension of what needs to remain in the forgotten category and what is safe and timely to be remembered. We could call this part of you, your Gatekeeper, the guardian of the necessary veil who enabled and afforded you to inhabit this desired third dimensional school without imploding.

It’s been a bit of a family joke for those that know me to have a little fun with my forgetfulness around movies. I’ve tended strongly to forget titles, story lines, and often only recall a movie I’m watching for the second time part way into the movie. It’s not all movies as some story lines made profound impacts and memories. Other movies, however, who people around me found interesting enough, I often even fell asleep to while watching.

I asked my Gatekeeper whose name is Rhodes about this, this morning and immediately my awareness expanded out that this forgetfulness of story has directly to do with the strength of the veil that I chose and needed this life. Even with Rhodes himself along with stories of my Metasoul aspects and their timelines, I’ve had trouble recalling some time following after having deep and profound processes of remembering. It would simply get swallowed back up into a sea of a kind of a sea of forgetfulness.

Rhodes communicated today that the strength of other timelines stories needed to have sufficient veil in order that the purpose of this timeline be protected. As I’m awakening, however, this movie amnesia, whether it’s about movies or about my soul history, or even this life history, is making other parts of me feel self conscious. They want to get on with remembering. Remembering, they feel is the answer to what is ached for, and the answer to where parts of me feel, I and they still experience suffering.

I’m told that forgetting is a kind of suffering, a burden to bear, if you will, that we all chose, collectively and individually as a service to the goals and desires of love. Forgetting is not static however. Forgetting is for the purpose of remembering. We hid our own Easter eggs and we wrapped our own Christmas presents. We forgot in order to remember.

I’m told that remembering is ’to be returned to being a member’, after surrendering to a kind of dismemberment from love. The forgetting had its own pains as does remembering, like blood returning to a limb that fell asleep.

I’m told that the whole purpose of forgetting and remembering was to expand love from its original perfect/imperfect state. Love itself wanted to be noticed and to be revered. It birthed duality as a place to get noticed, seen and appreciated.

Getting to know and feel this magical part of you who’s been your personal Gatekeeper is now your opportunity to negotiate the rate and pace and content of your awakening as you lovingly guide yourself and other parts of yourself through this epic journey.

Story lines from other timelines in your Metasoul await you to be felt and seen and transmuted into love. Karma itself also wants to be transmuted from the expectation of pain to the expectation of bounty and love.

Raphael Awen is co-creator, teacher, and facilitator of the SoulFullHeart Way Of Life.  Visit soulfullheartwayoflife.com for more information about sessions, events, videos, etc. Visit our donations page to offer a monthly or one time money donation to support our offerings.

Evolution Through INvolution

By Gabriel Heartman

“Emerging from the cocoon, you are a new creature and everything is different. There are no laws. There are just fossilized habits. And the whole journey is crossing these habits – locating them and realizing the barrier to your development is also the lever. Medicine and biology have their codified barriers, which are all levers of sorts. If there is a wall, there is also the other side of the wall. To find the wall, to know it is a wall, is to be able to cross it.”

-Henri Monfort from Pranic Nourishment: Another Path To A Spiritual Life

While this quote is specific to our biology and its preconceived limitations in regards to living a life of pranic nourishment, I can also replace ‘medicine and biology’ with almost any 3D structure. Politics, government, education, economics, society, etc. and come to an awareness that our evolution comes through our own personal INvolution.

That inner evolution comes when we come to and cross these ‘Rubicons’ of growth and consciousness. Parts stare at the edge of an abyss or the perceived infinite height or depth of a wall, and come to choice point. Do I keep this structure in place or do I choose to connect with my soul at a higher and deeper level to guide me with Grace across, and through, these ‘barriers’?

When choosing Soul, the levers open up and we are invited to cross over.

This is a death and a rebirth. This glorified and rarified moment we chose to embody Life at a level once imperceptible to our awareness. It becomes the New Now. The Norm. The ground we now walk upon that offers more than physical death and taxes.

You are freeing yourself from one world, and entering a new one.

The ‘rules’ have shifted and now life/consciousness takes on a whole different trajectory than the one it used to be beholden to. This does not come without a price of feeling the pain of that. But with each felt step and integration, we walk the road back to our essence as Love, Light, and Magic.

Weightless, fearless, and free.

*****

Gabriel Heartman is an emoto-spiritual men’s and women’s facilitator, energy healer, writer, poet, and heartist with the SoulFullHeart Way of Life.  Visit https://www.soulfullheartwayoflife.com for more information about space holding sessions, group calls, videos, community, etc. 

Visit our website to offer a money donation to support our offerings at https://www.soulfullheartwayoflife/donations.

Sometimes Real Love Can Feel Like A Bully

Real love presses and invites with compassionate passion. It wants more of Itself to shine and be shown. When it feels that it is being hidden away, defended, or downplayed, Love goes for the cracks. The places that it can sneak under to find more of Itself to heal and flourish.

To the part of us that takes a defensive stance to being “infiltrated” in the name of self-preservation, it is just wanting what is known to stay in stasis because it is all it has ever known…even if this is suffering or crisis. So if love is advocating for itself, which lies on the other side of those walls, then Love would feel like a bully to this defended part of us.

This can only feel true if there is a bully inside that provokes that response. An experience of being punished or persecuted, either this life or others, creates a knee-jerk protective stance toward anything that feels encroaching our inner sanctum of vulnerability. 

“Tough love” comes to mind when I ponder this more. Tough love has an edge to it that can be an inner punisher part of one person that is using this term as an excuse to off-gas abusive energy. There may be a true loving intention, but this energy can be tainted with some toxicity. If there is an experience of this within a spiritual or psychological framework, your Protector most certainly can have some reaction when Real Love is being offered. 

What is the difference? 

It comes down to feeling your own inner bully dynamic and how that may be being projected out and even drawing these situations. It is also about being vulnerable with the feeling of being bullied that draws out this inner energy. There is a sorting out that takes place to parcel out what is “tough” and what is “real”. Real love can be intense and may be tough to a part of us, but it is never toxic or rough. It does not pry or demand, but invites and passionately advocates. 

In any authentic and safe healing space, the healer must also be in tune with their own emotional and spiritual bodies and be willing to feel and see their own “stuff” that may be a part of any advocacy or difficult love offering. This allows the protective part of the one receiving healing and guidance to feel safe and open. 

This is why those of us in SoulFullHeart are always asking ourselves, and each other, if where we are coming from has tinges of an energy that may feel “off” so that we can feel how that may be affecting our facilitation. As a community, it is a system of checks and balances that is about our own personal growth as well as our commitment to being the most authentic healing modality out there. 

If you have experienced this wound of toxic love, my heart goes out to you. I am sorry that happened. I want to invite that part of you to experience something different and possible. Something genuine and real. Something that leads you to experience a new relationship to the pain and trauma, with transparency, honesty, and heart-open advocacy.

******

Gabriel Heartman is an emoto-spiritual men’s and women’s facilitator, energy healer, writer, poet, and heartist with the SoulFullHeart Way of Life.  Visit https://www.soulfullheartwayoflife.com for more information about space holding sessions, group calls, videos, community, etc. 

Visit our website to offer a money donation to support our offerings at https://www.soulfullheartwayoflife/donations.