By Raphael Awen
What makes for the funnest fun in life is getting to know what’s on the leading edge of your being AND what’s on the trailing edge of your being, as well as the you that tends to ride the in between middle.
We all know a whole lot more about what’s in the muted muddied middle of our being: not quite sure what we want, boredom, escape, excitement? But when we venture from this not-so-comfortable comfort zone into the unexplored regions of our being where we don’t know what’s going on, and where the radar doesn’t inform us, we enter our true capacity for aliveness.
The leading edge of our being holds our latest discoveries as a soul being, being and doing human life as us. Our trailing edge of our being holds our deepest wounds from this and other lifetimes; our wounded reactivity to life; the stuff in the shadows that parts of ourselves would naturally try to hide from even our awareness.
It’s the tension between the two that makes for the juice in all of our relationships with all aspects of life. In people relationships, it is our leading and trailing edges combinations that make for our deepest co-dependencies as well as our greatest fulfillments. In our relationship with our calling, it is the inclusion and discovery of both the leading and trailing edge where that calling comes to life. It is not the overcoming of the trailing edge, but rather the embracement of it that provides for the unfolding journey of magic.
In our attempts to overcome or transcend our trailing edge of our being, we actually suppress a very necessary energy that wants to provide the necessary movements we seek and want. Parts of us want the middle. Other parts of our being want the edges. We, as an arising healthy parent to these orphaned parts of ourselves, are being invited to show up and negotiate a path in and through.
I know for instance that I feel a great calling to be an outstanding teacher. At 56 years of age, I daydream of being in demand and well rewarded to speak to large gatherings of people, speaking with a compelling charisma that transforms people and audiences to experience something they and we never experienced together before. In my leading edge of being, I can feel this reality as if it were here now. It lives in me and always has. In my trailing edge of being however, I feel a variety of resistances and hesitations about this desired timeline. If I am unable to embrace these outer regions of my leading edge/trailing edge being, I am left with a seriously muted alchemy. If I embrace one edge at the expense of the other, I am left with a weird creation that hurtles through time and space serving at best as a poor example.
What is your biggest dream? Would it embarrass a part of you to admit it? Is it okay with you to leave it de-energized in this muddied middle of your being away from the power of your leading and trailing edges of your being? What choice point is in front of you that feels like a doorway in? (there always is a doorway in if we’re willing to see it)
You’ve got a whole lot more inside of you than parts of you have been willing to admit!
When you own the leading and trailing edges of your being, you get really interesting to the universe, and you open yourself to the highest timeline possibilities for your life.
(Audio of this blog can be found here: https://youtu.be/y7nY5twy90E)
Raphael Awen is co-creator, teacher, and facilitator of the SoulFullHeart Way Of Life. Visit www.soulfullheartwayoflife.com for more information about sessions, group calls, videos, community, etc.