Equinox Energy Update: Finding Balance and Trust In The Midst Of UPHeaval

By Jelelle Awen


The EQUInox passage happening….an invitation for balance in a phase of seemingly extreme upheaval in Gaia’s weather manifestations and some personal inner chaos too to push up the most tender and core wound levels to be felt and healed. How do you find balance in the midst of such a collective and personal time of transition and shifting consciousness?

Coming into balance has a changing definition during this phase of the ascension process then it did before. It isn’t about just finding calm, peacefulness, centeredness, not being reactive, suppressing all ‘negative’ emotions. It isn’t about just meditating away your tensions and anxieties and fears. It is about integrating what got downloaded to you during the total eclipse in August (and with ALL the intense energies in August) that offered your highest timeline service of love here…integrating this download WITH the reactions that come up in response to this from your emotional body.

You are being given tastes, glimpses, dreams, senses, synchs, new connections, resources, transitions, death AND rebirth opportunities to embody this new timeline choice point by choice point. You are being offered external shifts that are ‘happening to you’ and yet really are happening WITH you on the soul level IF you hadn’t proactively made some of these changes yourself. Experiencing seemingly random ‘weather events’, for example, can offer this opportunity in a catalytic and powerful way (in collaboration with your soul/higher self) that parts of you may not allow you to make otherwise.

Balance in the now comes from the return to a sense of trust and surrender even when (and ESPECIALLY WHEN) your life is in upheaval. Even when loss is much more common than gains; even when you are saying ‘no’ more than ‘yes’. Even when material things have been taken from you; even when what you previously thought was your soul purpose work has fallen away; even when your most beloved animal companions have left you (which seems to be happening quite a lot right now!); even when your previously comfortable relationships no longer work for you and need to complete. When it seems as if the highest timeline dream is farther away than ever AS the old collapses around you, and yet somehow you return to trust that it is ALL right in the bigger picture. You feel how what is being lost is only making room for the new to come in. You are experiencing the necessary void before the new manifests.

The anchors to 3D life seem somehow more obvious than ever in this phase. This can leave you feeling like you aren’t as ‘far along’ in your awakening as you previously thought you were. The 3D anchors of your 3D self are meant to be MORE in your face so that they will receive loving attention from your heart. Sometimes they become painfully obvious as the tug and pull becomes more conscious and the suffering that they cause or the undigested woundings that still need to be felt become more clear. This is about making way for the higher timeline reality, so the previous traumas need to be triggered to be felt some how and in some way. What has been able to be avoided or transcended or diverted no longer can be. Balance is discovered in holding space for the process of feeling it all, reliving it with the 3D parts of you that are experiencing it.

Balance sometimes looks like trusting that you are being guided even as you are more lost than found…..somehow feeling secure even in the jumping off of cliffs into the unknown rather than clinging to what has been known. Turning away from consciousness states that feel good and high in order to ‘go down’ to be with what most needs your attention. We are being invited to TRUST what is happening to us as we align with what we are here to BEcome and live out as we continue to move into the new together……finding a NEW kind of balance from within as connected to Divine Source.


Jelelle Awen is an Emoto-Spiritual Teacher, Soul Scribe, waySHOWer, and co-creator and teacher of the SoulFullHeart Way Of Life. She is author of Sacred Human, Arising Wonder: Ascension Through Integration Of Your Emotional Body With Your Spirituality and  Keep Waking Up! Awakening Journeys To Avalon And Beyond Visit soulfullheartwayoflife.com for more information about a FREE intro session with a SoulFullHeart facilitator, group calls, videos, retreats, etc.

Holding Space With Loving Presence For Your Most Tender Processes

By Jelelle Awen

It seems to be about the tender feelings and processes lately…going into the vulnerable places, the previously hidden nooks and crannies of our emotional and soul bodies. If you are feeling a lot, things you haven’t felt in awhile or at a deeper level or brand NEW textures that come from a core place within, the invitation is to go within and accept with love and curiosity what wants to come up and be felt. The high vibe cosmic Divine frequencies coming in since the beginning of the year and especially the last couple of months water us with love so that we CAN be with our pains and our vulnerabilities. The high makes room for the low; the up allows for the down.

I am feeling this too and have been holding space to feel the root cause within me of a seemingly universal wound around being unwanted and rejected by 3D life AT birth and even in the womb. I have been reliving my first weeks after birth and being with in loving presence my baby self. I was six weeks premature, so my first experiences of 3D life were spent in an incubator, under artificial lighting, in a clinical hospital environment without my parents around. My baby self was touched very little by human hands, yet I am remembering how spirit guides and Mother Mary were lovingly around as my soul made a choice whether to leave or to stay. It was very tempting to leave and I felt the textures of that in my emotional body recently, the visceral feelings of it, which years of parts work process have given me access to as I have cleared out and healed much else that I have experienced here within my 3D self.

I surrendered to this emotional healing journey as I know and trust it will bring the gifts of deeper incarnation here, a fuller choice to BE HERE NOW and will serve the ascension process of bringing my sacred humanity/higher self into my human body. Thank the Divine for parts work and the SoulFullHeart process that allows for a bridge to the unknown/emotional body/unconscious mind and the constant self permission/support of my beloveds to go where is needed within me.

So much can be used to avoid feeling, as you’ve been trained in 3D living to distract, divert, and disconnect from your feeling states and emotional body. Your beloved spiritual practices and even the constant care and feeding of high vibe frequency states can be used this way. Often this is a protective part of you that is using spiritual vibes to bypass or avoid going into uncomfortable feeling states. This part of you may not feel that you could ‘handle’ to feel your own pain or to relive the places again that remain undigested in your emotional body. Negotiation and connection with this Protector inside of you as a separate part of you, such as what we offer in the SoulFullHeart process, invites this part to JOIN you in the healing exploration, to reveal to you what needs your love and attention.

You have this tremendous capacity to feel it ALL as is contained in your sacred human heart, a fractal capacity expression from Infinite Love Divine Source. Huge potential within your heart to act as your own midwife, parent, and healer. The depths of compassion, forgiveness, and responsiveness that you can feel toward YOURSELF are limitless………as are the gifts that this self love alchemy gives you every time that you are willing to go within to offer your love where it is most needed.

We now offer a free intro session to give you a sense and taste of the SoulFullHeart process that empowers your capacity to hold and respond to yourself, negotiate with the protector and other 3D aspects, and receive loving support along the way.

Jelelle Awen is an Emoto-Spiritual Teacher, Soul Scribe, waySHOWer, and co-creator and teacher of the SoulFullHeart Way Of Life. She is author of Sacred Human, Arising Wonder: Ascension Through Integration Of Your Emotional Body With Your Spirituality and  Keep Waking Up! Awakening Journeys To Avalon And Beyond Visit soulfullheartwayoflife.com for more information about a FREE intro session with a SoulFullHeart facilitator, group calls, videos, retreats, etc.

Patiently Loving Your Deepest Densities Through The Push And Pulls

By Jelelle Awen


Push and pull….wanting to love and then resisting love. Wanting to change and then resisting change. Opening UP WIDE and then closing in again. These bliss moments are of heart doors swinging open and your heart pouring out to touch ALL of life. These mess moments are the heart doors shutting and your heart retracting again in pain.

These bliss mess moments of push and pull ARE your awakening process of heart and soul. Why would it be JUST bliss when this is not what you have known here in 3D living? Why would it be JUST about the highs when this has not been the reality you’ve experienced here? And, what is really learned from only UPs with no downs?

It is during the climbs and the crawls for which you learn the most about the substance for which you are made….in contrast to that which you are NOT. 3D reality doesn’t honor the climb, the process, the journey….yet wants the results and the gifts immediately. It wants the quick fixes rather than the long term gains.

A patience for the process allows that with UPs there will come downs too and wants BOTH. Your soul can hold space for the part of you formed in 3D life to learn, to sort it out, to open up and then close down. Your soul has access to Infinite Patience in this process and understands that it ‘takes the time that it takes’ to heal and clear the ground of your deepest densities.

These deepest densities are valued by your soul, not seen as ‘lesser’ at all, but rather a precious aspect of your journey here with Gaia. Not judged by the soul, yet rather held with curiousity and much love so that the required densities and toxicities needed to fit into a dualistic 3D world can be let go. The soul helps your 3D self unanchor from what it has needed to become attached to. Your higher heart allows this process to be held with MUCH love rather than inner battle and resistance loops that lead to suffering.

With a consistent heart and soul response from you to the deepest densities of your 3D self, it can let go of the push-pull it has known so often in your life and begin to let in LOVE more and more with less and less contraction away.

Jelelle Awen

We offer in SoulFullHeart a process through weekly sessions with SFH facilitators for navigating this feeling, differentiating and loving of your 3D self while healing/growing your 4D transition self and embodying more and more your 5D (higher self coming into the body) self. We offer a free intro session for you to connect what you’ve been experiencing of awakening with how the process might serve you: soulfullheartwayoflife.com/sessions.

During a livestream tomorrow, Sunday, at 11:11am CST, Raphael Awen and I will be offering an introduction to our process, the 3D self, how current cosmic energies are impacting this process and answering any questions you would like to ask us about this…I’ll be streaming it here on my feed and also on our SoulFullHeart Way Of Life feed….more info here:https://www.facebook.com/events/1273156469462294

From Heaven to Hell: The Sacred Ground Of Being Popped Into And Out Of 5D


There has been an interesting dynamic occurring lately, where a few souls have been asking for assistance with a particular spiritual situation.  The scenario generally goes like this: A person has a huge awakening experience that comes to them seemingly out of the blue.  They have been “popped” into a conscious 5D awareness.  The visceral experiences vary, but the feeling is one of elation and bliss.  A whole new way of being in life.  And then, something happens to clunk them back into a denser frequency that feels like a hell in comparison to where they were at.  Intense reactions and thoughts get pushed up that make life almost unbearable to live after that.  I feel like this may be happening more and more, and those that are dealing with it feeling like they are alone in this “nightmare” that a part of them is experiencing. Perhaps you can relate with this too.

What is happening here? How could you be so high one minute and be so low the next without a sense of how or why? There could be a multitude of different individual reasons, but one general one that feels true is that there are woundings that are needing to be addressed that have not been resolved/healed in your emotional body.  The stay in 5D has a shelf life equivalent to what has been repressed and unfelt as traumas in your shadow.  There is a big soul drama being played out in the court of your human heart and it is asking for attention.

Now, how it got to be this way can be easily, and understandably, taken as it being done to you by someone else. You could ‘blame’ a negative entity or a teacher/healer’s etheric malpractice happening to you.  Once you have rescinded to the status of victim, you have lost your power.  So, first thing, you must take power back.  Realize that this is all being conducted by the Higher Self, not as a punishment, for love doesn’t punish, but as an opportunity to reclaim the buried and lost parts of yourself before taking off into deeper conscious territories of experience.  This is a big one to let in and be with for it grants the courage and conditions to make the next steps.

The next step is to feel how this feeling of hell is being held by a PART of you and not all of you.  It is a very scared 3D protector part that so much needs to feel someone bigger than the hell itself.  In fact, this part created the hell in order to be felt in all the traumas that still exist.  It says, “Hey, yo! You can’t just leave me here all alone! I have some things to say!” It is banking on the fact that you will give up the awakening path because it is too much for it to bear.  By feeling it as a separate part, a dialogue and relationship can form that can offer some relief.  There could be many “this life” 3D traumas that are also triggering Metasoul woundings at the same time.  It can be a spaghetti pretzel of a mess emotionally without the help of a mirror to help assist someone in untangling the knots, such as what we offer in the SoulFullHeart process.

It is important to understand that the “hell” you find yourself in is a sacred birthing ground.  It is not to be saved from or given temporary relief.  It is for a very important process.  It may even need to continue if your soul has signed up to experience something that it needs and wants to experience. In SoulFullHeart, there are no promises or guarantees that you can, or should, exit this very difficult place.  It is all an unfolding that takes much dedication and yet may still not yield the desired results if that is not what is meant to occur.

BUT, there is a process that can be had that can help to create the space from it so you can take the next steps.  I have had many “hell” experiences myself and can understand the intense emotions that are swirling inside.  However, there has to be just enough of a solid self and self-love there to create the space necessary to feel the parts inside you that are needing attention.  This is where the SoulFullHeart Process can be of service.  My heart goes out to those that are living in this intensity and hold it as a very sacred time, even though it feels scary as hell.

Gabriel Heartman is an emoto-spiritual men’s and women’s facilitator, energy healer, writer, poet, and heartist with the SoulFullHeart Way of Life.  Visit https://www.soulfullheartwayoflife.com for more information about space holding sessions, group calls, videos, community, etc.

Visit our patreon page to offer a money donation to support our offerings at https://www.patreon.com/soulfullheart.

Dearest Sacred Human: You Are Arising – With Magdalena And Christiel

Dearest Human,
You are arising….from the seeds of your sacred humanity, in feminine or masculine form, does your little bud grow into full blossom. Watered by self love, self worth, self connection…….your flower petals of soul and heart open wide, open UP, releasing the mysterious scents and displaying the vibrant colors of your human-ness. This organic growth process happening often without your witnessing or tracking, spring-loaded as it is to occur.

You are arising….from the deep sleep of not being seen or heard or recognized in your authentic feminine or masculine VULNERABLE powerful leadership……now BEing woken up to your soul purpose here. Transitioning from your slumbering sleeping beauty state to your co-leading reign with your BEloved mate OR alone as solo Queen or King for a phase. Your slumber has been necessary, yet so painful at times, I know, and I have been compassionate witness to it ALL.

You are arising….from the letting go of mirrors within relationships that no longer reflect your awakening self. BEing real about how you FEEL in these unions, especially those formed from previous genetic bonds, soul agreements that may be complete, and karmic binds that you no longer need. Moving on with love and grace from these bonds while keeping your heart open…..yet your soul, heart, body, and mind desires for nourishing transaction becoming more clear.

You are arising….from the tears of your inner child BEing felt finally and the little daughter or son within you receiving parenting care from you and from the Divine Feminine Mother. You are healing and integrating your 3D self aspects that had to form in order to survive the world. Your awakening WOMAN or MAN maturing through connection with the undigested trauma of those past thens….moments that still exist in the now of your emotional body that are assimilating into you. You are ripening into your emotional maturity AS you integrate the ageless wisdoms and gifts of your soul.

You are arising….from the remembering of your galactic origins and tastes of your Star BEing roots. You are being invited to speak the languages of these heritages, every syllable creating a wave form connection beaming out from your chrystalline throat and your cosmic heart. There is something ancient here and beyond time too, in the NOW you are merging with your Star BEing aspects to infuse higher dimensional frequencies into your human one to arise into a sacred form in human.

You are arising….from the essence of your purpose to serve love as you align your life to this calling. You are transitioning from DOing things as your means of drawing livelihood to BEing service of love in ALL moments. Receiving and responding to the gifts from the Universe and Divine Source that come as you serve love and let go of ‘hows’. The mind cannot be certified to serve love nor the remembrance of your soul gifts come from traditional learning or the previous self-image-based ways, yet you gain access to it as you BEcome and open up to it with your genuine and humble desire to serve love.

You are arising….We SO support this process and we are HERE to be with you in it ALL…the blooming, the growing, the speaking, the receiving, the responding, the giving, the serving, the BEING. We are HERE with so much love for you, AS aspects of you, to offer a template of NEW sacred human for you to lean into as our Divine frequencies blend with your human ones. You draw the form of us AS you that you most need and can resonate with.

Dearest sacred human…you are arising!! Claiming the love that you ARE and so BEcoming it too during this time of Re-Union and Re-membering. So much love to you from us to us and WITH you!

In love,

Magdalena, Christiel…. with Jelelle

Jelelle Awen is an Emoto-Spiritual Teacher, Soul Scribe, waySHOWer, and co-creator and teacher of the SoulFullHeart Way Of Life. She is author of Sacred Human, Arising Wonder: Ascension Through Integration Of Your Emotional Body With Your Spirituality and  Keep Waking Up! Awakening Journeys To Avalon And Beyond Visit soulfullheartwayoflife.com for more information about a FREE intro session with a SoulFullHeart facilitator, group calls, videos, retreats, etc.

Loving Your Mind Into Higher Vibration

By Jelelle Awen


A to B to C….linear thinking is not the most easy or natural right now. Maybe you are finding this too as our mental capacities are expanded, awakened…you could even say ‘aroused’ by the HIGH electromagnetics coming in. Our minds want to expand to context, thinking beyond the now and tracking multidimensional realities at once. Our 3D minds CAN be limiting, but I don’t see them as a huge hindrance to our awakening or get into the vibe of chasing down the ‘monkey mind’ energy as other teachers/healers offer. There can be a real crusade energy, a battle energy against the mind that doesn’t feel like it serves the enlovenment process ultimately.

Our mental bodies just naturally vibrate higher too as the parts of us that use them to filter, to limit, to suppress feeling, to make reality logical and fit into the five sense box…as these 3D-based parts of us are negotiated with by our embodying higher self then our mental body vibrates higher too (just like with all our bodies – emotional, social, chakral/energetic, physical.) We’ve been conditioned in 3D to educate our minds, fill and saturate them right up with content, and in an overly masculine way in most cases that is focused on achievement, self image-based. Yet, that ALL shifts as awakening happens and the higher vibe feminine and the higher vibe masculine heal and integrate.

I feel that resisting our minds leads to headaches esp. and the codes/information/invitation coming in right now seem to want us to expand BEYOND and not judge our minds. Pain always equals resistance to LOVE on some level. These love light energies want to move us into multidimensional experience, connect with the non-dual nature of reality too. The punisher part inside can hugely judge our minds (using spiritual ‘truths’ and dogmas) rather than allow for the self loving investigation into WHY and HOW the mind has been used to not feel and not expand into deeper metaphysical realities. The why usually leads to a very tender process of more embracement of the higher mind and the feminine/right brain side of BEing. AND the mind can actually help with this exploration, which makes it even more nourishing and allows it to progress more quickly!

Even in this now, I can’t use my mind to figure out anything very logical or practical (as I served SoulFullHeart energy during a session this morning and am still ‘up there’ quite a ways), yet I can somehow put some decent thoughts together to share with you. My 5D self is communicating now, beyond the written word, with curves and swerves and multi layers of meaning that you take in the way and means you are meant to. I didn’t even KNOW what I was going to write about or that I would write about THIS, but there you go and here we are!

Love your mental body….invite it into inner exploration to discover how and why it is used and in what ways. You could even write a letter to your mind and see what you get back. My guess is that it is probably tired, wants to rest, and actually WANTS to expand more and help you with the ongoing ascension process. This is usually the case it seems once we stop resisting and start LOVING!

This is one of the areas of life we focus on during SoulFullHeart weekly sessions and we identify together the 3D, 4D, and 5D self and what your desires/frustrations are in this area of life (along with six others). More here in this article: http://www.soulfullheartwayoflife.com/3d4d5dselvesquestions

Photo was taken of the sunset codes the other night. Sharing here because sunset codes DEFINITELY go beyond the mind and because this information at sunset might be easier to take in with less body pains (resistances) and if negotiated with the mind.


Jelelle Awen is an Emoto-Spiritual Teacher, Soul Scribe, waySHOWer, and co-creator and teacher of the SoulFullHeart Way Of Life. She is author of Sacred Human, Arising Wonder: Ascension Through Integration Of Your Emotional Body With Your Spirituality and  Keep Waking Up! Awakening Journeys To Avalon And Beyond Visit soulfullheartwayoflife.com for more information about a FREE intro session with a SoulFullHeart facilitator, group calls, videos, retreats, etc.

Emotional Body Portal To 5D Manifestation


By Raphael Awen

You can work hard to manifest the future you want here in 3D like most people do, OR, you can ‘let-in’ the future your 5D/higher self has for you, or you can have some degree of both.

It’s important though not to see and feel the 3D kind of manifestation as lower or lesser. We all need and needed the time we did, and do, in normal everyday kind of 3D manifestation. After all, as a soul being, that’s what we came here for. We had too much of the 5D kind of manifestation actually. So we embraced the realm of duality, resistance and push-back as a sacred training ground to learn and feel ways of being and learning that we couldn’t experience any other way than we could but here in 3D, as a launching pad into other domains and dimensions, to discover what we actually always were, but didn’t know it.

As we complete some of these lessons, we naturally gravitate back towards the home we are and the home know from our higher self’s perspective.

For instance, we can spend decades embroiled in trying to get ahead financially, or socially, or maybe just really focused trying to be a better person in some way, shape or form. We all know what that looks like. But what would a 5D way of approaching manifestation look and feel like?

The 5D self doesn’t live inside of time or space constraints like our 3D self does. The 5D self can ‘time travel’ quite effortlessly to get a ‘read’ on what our 3D self calls the ‘future’ and ingest the vibe of that vibrational reality into our emotional body. Now, in 3D, your bank balance, let’s say, is still the same, but you can feel, so you know what this 5D bank balance and associated changes to your lifestyle will look and feel like in your future. You have the higher upstream reality in your ‘field.’ As you feel this, you are dialling this reality incubation ally into your feeling and thought patterns. You are experiencing, through what we call creative visualization, the feeling tones of this new and higher timeline. You are beginning to spend less time resistively in anxiety about the future, keeping your 3D generator running full speed and are instead allowing your 5D generator to come more and more to the foreground. As we are multidimensional, we have capacity to run as hybrids (3, 4, and 5D simultaneously) and all of us are doing this to varying degrees. Our 3D reality is a projection of our higher upstream reality of 5D.

As you let in this new feeling toned reality of relating to life, you go on to feel how all this talk of past, present and future are all just concepts to help keep your 3D self from flipping out. You already have your future, and your future is manifesting in and through your present. You can visit your past in the now and feel and heal the happenings there and then feel a relieved you in the present having changed the past! Wild stuff for sure, but I feel this to be what the new frontier of our awakening consciousness is offering us.

The coolest and biggest entry point I can offer you as a portal into this brave new world is through the emotional body. All this bigness I am describing and vibing to you is resonating because it’s already in you, it is you, spring loaded, yet tethered and anchored by the emotional wounding we all carry in our emotional bodies. Emotional body healing through getting to know and feel parts of ourselves naturally releases the charges and lowers the walls that keep our higher dimensional experiences at bay in our lives. This approach to our spirituality and emotionality turns the ascetic disciplinary ‘meditate all day’ approach on its head.

You don’t need to focus on attainments and enlightenments. You get to be deeply with what is, things that actually reconcile you to you, things that let your higher self essence flow more uninhibited into the sacred present domains of your present ‘can’t get any more sacred’ life. The changes you desire are all part of the setup. So are any deep resistive patterns, addictions, and dis – ease in your body…all of it awaiting your intention, discovery and choice.

Raphael Awen is co-creator, teacher, and facilitator of the SoulFullHeart Way Of Life. Visit  www.soulfullheartwayoflife.com for more information about sessions, group calls, videos, community, etc.

Return LOVE in money form: https://www.paypal.me/supportsoulfullheart or visit our Patreon page to become a monthly supporter: https://www.patreon.com/soulfullheart.


Loving The Leading And Trailing Edges Of Our Being


By Raphael Awen

What makes for the funnest fun in life is getting to know what’s on the leading edge of your being AND what’s on the trailing edge of your being, as well as the you that tends to ride the in between middle.

We all know a whole lot more about what’s in the muted muddied middle of our being: not quite sure what we want, boredom, escape, excitement? But when we venture from this not-so-comfortable comfort zone into the unexplored regions of our being where we don’t know what’s going on, and where the radar doesn’t inform us, we enter our true capacity for aliveness.

The leading edge of our being holds our latest discoveries as a soul being, being and doing human life as us. Our trailing edge of our being holds our deepest wounds from this and other lifetimes; our wounded reactivity to life; the stuff in the shadows that parts of ourselves would naturally try to hide from even our awareness.

It’s the tension between the two that makes for the juice in all of our relationships with all aspects of life. In people relationships, it is our leading and trailing edges combinations that make for our deepest co-dependencies as well as our greatest fulfillments. In our relationship with our calling, it is the inclusion and discovery of both the leading and trailing edge where that calling comes to life. It is not the overcoming of the trailing edge, but rather the embracement of it that provides for the unfolding journey of magic.

In our attempts to overcome or transcend our trailing edge of our being, we actually suppress a very necessary energy that wants to provide the necessary movements we seek and want. Parts of us want the middle. Other parts of our being want the edges. We, as an arising healthy parent to these orphaned parts of ourselves, are being invited to show up and negotiate a path in and through.

I know for instance that I feel a great calling to be an outstanding teacher. At 56 years of age, I daydream of being in demand and well rewarded to speak to large gatherings of people, speaking with a compelling charisma that transforms people and audiences to experience something they and we never experienced together before. In my leading edge of being, I can feel this reality as if it were here now. It lives in me and always has. In my trailing edge of being however, I feel a variety of resistances and hesitations about this desired timeline. If I am unable to embrace these outer regions of my leading edge/trailing edge being, I am left with a seriously muted alchemy. If I embrace one edge at the expense of the other, I am left with a weird creation that hurtles through time and space serving at best as a poor example.

What is your biggest dream? Would it embarrass a part of you to admit it? Is it okay with you to leave it de-energized in this muddied middle of your being away from the power of your leading and trailing edges of your being? What choice point is in front of you that feels like a doorway in? (there always is a doorway in if we’re willing to see it)

You’ve got a whole lot more inside of you than parts of you have been willing to admit!

When you own the leading and trailing edges of your being, you get really interesting to the universe, and you open yourself to the highest timeline possibilities for your life.

(Audio of this blog can be found here: https://youtu.be/y7nY5twy90E)

Raphael Awen is co-creator, teacher, and facilitator of the SoulFullHeart Way Of Life. Visit  www.soulfullheartwayoflife.com for more information about sessions, group calls, videos, community, etc.

Return LOVE in money form: https://www.paypal.me/supportsoulfullheart or visit our Patreon page to become a monthly supporter: https://www.patreon.com/soulfullheart.

Natural Disasters As Reflections Of Our Own Harbingers Of Change


Bracing for impact.  This is the mantra for today that circulates the bulk of the news. Irma is making herself known in the United States as She has made herself known in other island geographies. Preparations and choices have been made. Now is the waiting out and responding.  In this moment, individuals are going through their own internal emotional hurricanes, in various categories of energetic amplitude. It is in these moments that we come face to face, heart to heart with what it is that makes us human.

In this way, Irma is a harbinger, a messenger, and an equalizer. She is part of the collective and part of us individually. She triggers us into our deepest fears and our greatest strength. In the depths of the fear we come to terms with our physical mortality. The 3D Self is in a state of tumult as all of the things and relationships that it has attached to are under “attack”.  So much has been done to ensure that what was before will stay the same after.  These are the “Winds of Change” that the 3D Self spends so much energy trying to avoid. It is understandable because there is so much investment in what lies outside, and when that is taken away we are left with what hasn’t been deeply felt on the inside.

Whether we live in Florida or not, we are connected and have our own personal investment in Irma as She activates our Body Humanity.  It is as if our emotional and spiritual bodies have all been joined more consciously these days.  Even if we haven’t been watching the news, the psychic tendrils make their way in.  All of these events are wake up calls.  They remind us that we are a part of this grand consciousness known as Gaia.  We are Her and She is us.  I don’t feel She has sent Irma to punish us. That feels like a punishing God/Goddess story.  She very well may be technologically enhanced, but that too seems to distract us from what she is trying to inform us of in a larger context.

Gaia is ascending and She is inviting us with her. This is going to kick up all the ways that we have been unconscious of what keeps us in 3D.  We have chosen these experiences and will continue to until we choose to heal what it is that we are truly afraid of, that prevents us from letting in the love that wants to upend all places we choose to hide it. It is as if Irma IS Love! How is that for upside down thinking?

Any natural disaster can be viewed in this way.  As a reflection of what it is that is rumbling inside of us.  So many tension points and energetic polarity dances that can create “shit storms” inside of us.  But that of course is how our 3D self would choose to view them.  Our 4D self understands what is going on today.  It sees how this is a going on place.  A chance to feel something alive inside that wasn’t otherwise felt in the day to day machinations of 3D living.  The 4D self is taking stock of what is being lost and what is being gained on the other side.  Maybe this is the final wake up call.  The one that sets the intention to finally let go of the old and feel the loss and mourning of that to make way for something new.  Not to rebuild, but to realign.

These “disasters” are held as sacred events.  They elucidate the core of what it means to be alive and the parts of us that are afraid of deep change, even when they know it is the way to health, growth, and love.  I invite you to feel your own inner Irma’s, Harvey’s, wildfires, earthquakes, and tsunamis today.  What are they trying to offer you in the way toward living your most prized experience of life and love?  What changes are they wanting you to make without leaving your fear buried over? What do you feel like on the flip side?  This is the first step in the journey of a thousand. The blessings are there to be found.


Gabriel Heartman is an emoto-spiritual men’s and women’s facilitator, energy healer, writer, poet, and heartist with the SoulFullHeart Way of Life.  Visit https://www.soulfullheartwayoflife.com for more information about space holding sessions, group calls, videos, community, etc.

Visit our patreon page to offer a money donation to support our offerings at https://www.patreon.com/soulfullheart.


Useless Love


By Raphael Awen

Love that cannot be felt or known isn’t of any value.

You and I may be infinite love, surrounded by infinite love, and returning to infinite love, but to whatever degree we cannot feel this, it actually isn’t true in our felt reality of what it feels like to be living life as us.

It is from the heart, or from the emotional body, that our relationship with love is governed and moderated. We came here in order to not just be love, but to have a relationship with love.

That meant dialling up for ourselves having the felt sense of being separated from love and then finding our way back to love. We needed to make love a perceived ‘other’ to ourselves, in order to feel it, observe it, so that we could come to know it in a way that we previously could not by remaining in a oneness place.

BUT, in order to do that, to open ourselves to the full array of love and not-love, and the comparative duality between them, it necessitated that we open ourselves to the full range of both love’s presence and love’s absence. When I feel the staggering atrocity of that, and all the pain we experience because of that, I can only heart-surmise that it made sense to us from the vantage point of our previous domain, as we could clearly see and feel the unfathomable depths of beauty and bounty in being reintroduced to love in this way – forgetting (giving up having) in order to remember (to return to membership).

(Insert here: every love story and every story for that matter, as every story is a story ultimately about love. Insert every piece of music ever written, every photo taken, every piece of poetry, every song, every language, every life lived…that’s the deal we are doing here…that’s the proverbial meaning of life…we know what the intended meaning of life IS now…we just are wanting to get on with knowing and feeling that meaning!)

So all of this comes back to being hinged on the heart. Our heart is the doorkeeper to love, this love that we were, this love that we still are, this love that we at core yearn for more of. The crumbs of love that we once came to know in previous years of our lives understandably became the treasures and addictions we are unwilling to risk losing later in life given our great hunger and need for love. The source of our pain and suffering and the disease in our bodies is sourced in this hunger and do-or-die for love. We even must play the victim claiming love’s unfairness in the courts of life for entire lifetimes as part of our personal dramas of this return to the love that we are.

When we can see and feel that it is our heart that is regulating our experience with life, it kind of puts all the priority on getting to know and feel what’s going on in the heart, right? I mean, what else really matters? Even the point of all ‘matter’ is love!

I’m pumped on feeling and finding ways to explore this gatekeeper called the heart. Without this exploration, every other endeavour, in every arena of life is suspect of being a cover for what isn’t happening in the heart domain.

In SoulFullHeart, we have and continue to experience profound shifts and movements with ourselves and the world around us through what we call ‘parts work’, getting to know and feel the parts of ourselves that make up what we have simply called our personality. In getting to know and feel a single distinct part of ourself is where the actual return to love that I’m describing above occurs.

Remember, I explained above that as a soul we leave perceived and actual oneness (while magically retaining it somehow) to experience a fractured reality, the whole point of which is the return to oneness, albeit at a much greater realization. As in the spiritual body, so it is in the emotional body. We fragment in order to return to wholeness. SoulFullHeart doesn’t fragment the emotional body, but rather deeply acknowledges and gets to know the fragmentation that already exists in us, the fragmentation we chose, the fragmentation that governs and moderates our relationship to love, and then from there, renegotiates a conscious letting-in of this love that we are…that we needed to forget and remember…so that we could actually feel and know the love that we are….one sacred moment at a time!

Okay, that’s a lot to take in isn’t it? It’s a lot to write about in the moment! 🙂

We are also currently offering a free ½ hour personal intro session and the details are here about that: http://www.soulfullheartwayoflife.com/sessions

Thanks for reading! Thanks for wanting! I look forward to hearing from you.

Raphael Awen

Raphael Awen is co-creator, teacher, and facilitator of the SoulFullHeart Way Of Life. Visit  www.soulfullheartwayoflife.com for more information about sessions, group calls, videos, community, etc.

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