The image above is one I drew many years ago while holding space for a deep despairing and existential aspect of me. I was reminded of it in my meditation this morning not just as a personal memory but as a collective representation of what ascension can feel like to many. I have been with negative thoughts and feelings most of my life. They stem from family legacy, social connections, cultural conditionings, soul wounds, and whatever shenanigans are being entered into our psychic fields by less than benevolent beings. The image of a spaghetti ball described this energy to a tee, from my perspective.
This was a pivotal reason for my desire to heal as I knew that I was more than this energy. Though I didn’t know all the science at the time, I didn’t need it to in order to realize it was altering my reality in a big way. So going in was the only way to change that course. There was a wealth of emotion to feel and bring to my inner lovelight. To be held by the Divine in grace and gratitude. As the personal historical roots of the negativity are healed and integrated, there are more layers to follow that arise when they need to in relationship to our soul’s experience. The process is the same and showers us with gifts of immense proportion, if there is surrender and movement from these aspects of us.
But there are energies that do not wish to surrender to the love we are offering. There is a collective pain body that I call the Paintrix (3D body) that has its own inertia. When we still have resonant wounds inside of us, the reaction to circumstances can feel way over the boundary of what feels like us. It feels deeper and heavier. Almost like molasses. To some of us, we may have been accustomed to or charged with transmuting this energy for a community or group in our soul history. This is not self-loving in any way. We can access the soul aspect that held this and help it let go.
It can be difficult at times to know what is ours and what is not. That is why we need a mirror to us so that we can get a better reflection in these times. It is not our responsibility to transmute these energies. I feel it puts the responsibility back on the collective and the individuals that construct it. This is a process of individuating from the 3D body. These energies can also be a part of a larger virus in the psychic field imposed by negative beings of which there is a lot of information on.
I share this today as reflection of what will be unfolding in the times to come. We need to stay vigilant with our healing and maintaining our higher frequencies. It is not just through positive mantras that can truly bring healing, but also a deep process of emotional integration, energy work, and daily connection with our Higher Self and guides. Through all of my efforts I still get entangled at times and this is on its way out the door. This is never a light topic but it leads to our eventual reclaiming of our true power, worth, and joy. It is a gift to us if we can hold it that way. Telling us which way NOT to go and steering us toward our Higher Purpose. We are here to serve you in discovering what you truly are and letting go of what you are not. I offer my personal heart to those of you who similar experiences and am here to guide you through it should you choose.
Sequoia Heartman is a writer, heartist, and facilitator of the SoulFullHeart Way Of Life. Visit soulfullheartwayoflife.com for more information about sessions, online group calls and circles, community, videos, and more.