By Raphael Awen
Jelelle and I have our next group call coming up on Sunday the 14th entitled Sacred Sexuality, and I want to invite you.
Okay, that was a bit of a ploy. Pardon the grabby come on, but the purpose of this writing is to draw people who might be interested in the call, so I thought it best to be in full disclosure right from the get go.
Can I ask you, how has life been for you as a sexual being? How do you at present relate to your sexuality?
Whether your experiences have been deeply negative or out of this world positive, both are a lot to bear in this mystery of our sexuality.
That you and I came into this life with this awakening need and desire of sexuality along with its potential for both the deepest fulfillments and the deepest disappointments really points to the vulnerability of our souls choosing to be in human incarnation.
For me, my teenage awakening into my sexuality was marked with fears and hiding that I effectively suppressed by taming it alongside a Christian dedication to God and Christian service. I embraced the no sex before marriage advice, partly out of my fear of my own sexuality and partly of wanting God’s blessing and sense of safety on something I felt to be so potentially unknown, destructive and harmful. I managed to enter my first marriage as a virgin and experienced a bandwidth of sexuality that felt right for where I was at and what I could handle. From a soul perspective, I can see where this muting of my sexuality was motivated from other timelines of sexual regrets and remorse.
When I left Christianity, and that marriage of 23 years, I was surprised to find a very ripe and ready unexplored teenage sexual energy that was alive and well coming back into my life with me now in my mid 40’s. I knew I needed and wanted to explore and mature this sexual energy and life and the Divine opened out a couple of rich and rewarding relationships that surprised me by discovering whole new layers of the lover in me.
This laid a whole new groundwork sexually and emotionally to be in relationship with Jelelle. I was given and continue to be given experiences that feel like such deep treasures and even trophies to me and parts of me. I’d like to support you to create your own heaven of sexuality.
The journey of vulnerability, desire and beautiful experiences continued for me over the past 13 years together with Jelelle. Now, however, I especially feel another whole layer of sexual energy expanding out into an invitation into a much wider place that is beyond both the teenagers and the adult relationship with sexuality.
I especially feel how the masculine’s relationship with adequacy and sexual prowess on one hand and then the strange behaviour of needing to get to orgasm, and to effectively close the sexual space are both energies that are rooted in our fears of our sexuality. We can shy away from our sexuality, or put it out there and bury it under a performance, but in both of these polarities we see and feel our uninitiated relationship with our own sexuality.
I’m convinced now that I’m only scratching the surface of a much deeper terrain that wants to continue to reform and inform my life with this sexual energy in a way that relates to all areas of my life. Compartmentalized and contained sexuality is a safety measure that we maybe all needed while we did or do, but the invitation is for this sexual energy of mateship with all of life and love itself to overflow into this deep sexual union where there is no difference between the love of God, the love of other and the love of self.
Every person you meet along with yourself was portaled into this world by sexual energy and they each contain vital sexual energy as a common denominator of aliveness, with shared fears, desires and for some of us trophy experiences – but all of it is wanting to take us yet much deeper into something so much more. Can I turn in my trophies and admit I want to keep going into more?
I’m horny for that more, more than just talk, but ongoing flow into the infinite more that we each are. I hope you are too. Any and all sexual traumas, desires, fears, yearnings, trophies, sorrows, are all a portal into this deep going on place in your soul’s journey this life.
I hope you will consider joining us for the upcoming group call this Sunday at 5pm London time, that will be tailored to individuals and couples. We ask for a donation of any amount to join. Details below. This call is also free to all members of our SoulFullHeart Portal private network which you can join for $14.99 USD per month, which also helps support our work.
Here is the link to the Facebook event if you’d like further info or to invite a friend: https://www.facebook.com/events/109338231107311
Here is the event on our website where you can reserve your spot by making a donation: https://www.soulfullheart.org/grouptransmissions
Raphael Awen is co-creator, teacher, and facilitator of the SoulFullHeart Way Of Life. Visit soulfullheart.org for more information about sessions, events, videos, etc.
We are now offering our SoulFullHeart Portal on Mighty Networks, a private virtual gathering place for sharing exclusive content from us such as energy update writings and guided meditation videos, plus community forum threads with topics and groups that you can read, join, and contribute to as you want. You can join us at the SoulFullHeart Portal for a membership fee of $14.99 USD a month: soulfullheartportal.mn.co/