A Man’s Inward Holy Grail Quest To Find Real Worth, Value And Meaning

By Raphael Awen

King Arthur’s knights were ever drawn to escape the mundane, the everydayness of their lives. 

These sensitive and hungry souls had grown to despair of the emptiness of their culture, and their lives within that culture. 

They sought an escape into deeper meaning and purpose and an outer form of nobility and purpose to answer an inner unfelt loss of connection with their own nobility. God forbid that they should live out their days without a conscious quest to fill their sails. 

Is a monk of any stripe really any different? Or a renunciant – one who gives up something lesser for the attainment of something higher? What about the man seeking to make himself ‘independently wealthy’ – having no need of anyone or anything, or the hedonist pursuing every pleasure that men may come to know? The hedonist and the renunciant share a common hunger for something truly comforting.

So common to men of any background is the seeking of purpose and power within that purpose. Men are fleeing meaninglessness. Men will readily settle into a career or a family role because it stems this aching pain and discomfort coming from not knowing and feeling who they really are at a deeper level. 

Men who are not in touch with these deeper needs, the ones that really drive them, are then easily manipulated by agendas too numerous to mention – be they of the highest spiritual orders or the lowest callings known to men. Wouldn’t most of us trade in control or our sovereignty in exchange for comfort?

Men want more than anything to feel good about themselves, and if that means dedicating one’s life to helping others in order to feel good about themselves, then so be it, as long as it promises that they will get to feel good about themselves in the end.

The problem however comes in the constant delay of that promise – the futureness of it. ‘I’m so noble, I can delay my gratification of this need till later, in service of others.’ Men slip into settling for any kind of lessening of their pain of their disconnect from actually knowing and feeling their worth and their meaning, having long ago settled that they are not meant to ever know or actually live from a place of their worth, their value and true comfort. 

True embodied worth, that flows from within, that doesn’t rely on any outer circumstance or creed, that you can feel, that can colour your moments with the deepest creativity and engagement has long been written off as a dream, a myth. We are only left with a kind of nobility that makes the best of a really hopeless situation.

These kinds of dedicated happy campers, god bless them, are everywhere. Each of them with their alms begging bag extended before them. ‘Bestow upon me some spare change of worth and acknowledgment for the choices I have made and the example I am willing to be, during such a time of unprecedented loss’.

This all hits so close to home for me. At fourteen, I recall feeling so bored of being bored, longing to find freedom in anything that promised relief. The Christianity of my family heritage felt so compromised and lacking in passion, that I broke away into something much more engaging with a much higher bar of commitment and dedication. As a man to be, I needed to set my sail with a worthy quest to navigate the sea of meaninglessness that was all too real on every side, at every turn. 

It has taken a number of decades this life, and in numerous lifetimes beyond this one, to get to the place where I can feel that the true holy grail quest; from which flows every grail quest; from which flows every draft of any purpose ever imagined or set sail into; is actually about realizing the value and worth that lives inside, that has always lived inside, that awaits our choice and discovery. I can say I am truly coming to know and feel this worth and have my own experiential emerging felt reality of this kind of aliveness. I also feel the invitation for this to be the magic of an ongoing process, rather than some quest-ending instant gratification of these god given and god being kind of needs.

Only a man in growing touch with this inner worth has hopes of being enough for a woman, for a career, for a calling, for a quest, for belonging to a true circle of men who live in shared resonance with one another.

Having landed here in Glastonbury, England, a ‘fortnight’ ago, I am especially feeling King Arthur as a Metasoul brother wanting to digest and feel together with me the dissonance that still lives in men, especially in the men of the highest attainments, whether of spiritual or material pursuits. He says, ‘We got hoodwinked into thinking that if we chose nobility, duty and obligation, we would be guaranteed to find the deepest fulfillment, only to come full circle, after a long time spent in the desert in that lease of consciousness, and patterned brotherhood, having attained many things that felt so meaningful at the time, only to find out that we were ever still searching for the true holy grail, which was hiding all that time in plain sight, and yet for most, still remains hidden.’

The problem now comes in when feeling how to embrace such an inner quest without needing to enroll men into it for the purpose of feeling better about ourselves. Men must choose this for themselves, in their own time of sacred awakening, when the clock has run out of the necessary time spent in these previous domains – all of which are equally sacred and necessary to the inhabitation of the quest now arising. It can’t and won’t arise until it does.

I’m returning today and plan to return many times to the burial site and tomb of King Arthur here in Glastonbury inside of the Abbey ruins to feel this great cycle of death and rebirth that all men and mankind must grow into and go through. The once great Abbey that was the wealthiest in all of England, that held so much power and purpose in its many iterations over many centuries, by and for men of so many stripes, is seen to be coming from a worldview of domination, both of oneself and of others. Men of meaning and influence had to be in exchange with this centre of power to be granted lease and influence among men. Now, it sits in ruin as a 3D tourist attraction for tourists to scratch their heads in bewilderment at how and what such a thing was really about. 

I feel Arthur saying that he knows all too well now, what such a thing was all about – It was about the willingness of men and women to pool unimaginable resources into a patched together harmonious flow that promised this deliverance from meaninglessness. It was ultimately and humbly to serve as a bad example, of what couldn’t ultimately work, for the real needs of sacred human men and women, even as it shone a bright light and moved us in powerful new directions that were necessary and needed to bring us to this current flow of consciousness that is now arising – finding true worth and meaning that can only be found within, as Yeshua said, ‘where moth and rust does not corrupt, and where thieves cannot break in and steal.’ Domination itself as a way of life is in its sacred death and rebirth phase and we who are feeling it are the Ambassadors and the Death and Rebirth Doulas that are holding space for this sacred shift, along with its attendant new way of being. 

This is the true kingdoms and queendoms of heaven on earth that we are invited now to explore, to choose as deeply as we can in any and all moments, that thread meaning and deep purpose into the very fabric of your life as you currently know it. This is the true grail quest that we are invited to embrace, that gives purpose, direction, guidance, meaning and empowerment to all of life.

Much love, and wishing you deep strides on your sacred grail quest.

Raphael Awen

soulfullheart.org/sessions 

I work one on one with men in session space and the SoulFullHeart process to assist in this kind of personal awakening. If this calls to you, I’d like to hear from you. I’ll send you a few questions and a guided meditation for you to undertake to find us a starting place together and we can go from there in a way that is tailored to your needs and life. More info is here: soufullheart.org/sessions.

Raphael Awen is co-creator, teacher, and facilitator of the SoulFullHeart Way Of Life.  Visit soulfullheart.org for more information about sessions, events, videos, etc.

The Biggest Conspiracy Theory Of Them All

By Raphael Awen

There’s a lot of growing conspiracy theories floating around lately.

I’d like to float an even bigger one – that the biggest conspirator was and is love, as in The Divine, as in you and me.

Love became narcissistically and hopelessly focused on itself, as it was all there was. ‘All one’ became ‘alone’, landing in the antithesis of itself, it entered through its dis-ease and unease, a death, knowing that a rebirth would follow. It saw no other choice. In dying to itself, it gave birth to a firstborn, a perceived other, something seemingly enough outside of itself, to open a new playground, with a necessary game of good and evil, a game of masculine and feminine, a mind boggling game of epic duals and duality.

A game that would involve much hardship and pain, all of which could only be justified by the paling comparison to the stunning grandeur it would, if successful, bring about in the process – a perfect marriage of masculine achievement and feminine beauty.

You and I, Jeffery Epstein, Ghislaine, Bill and Hillary are all part of it. We’re ‘all one’ and ‘alone’ in it together. There isn’t actually two of us in the game and that’s why none of us are off the hook. We’re all responsible to the price tag on this endeavor. We all have great remorse to bear and great beauty and forgiveness to let in.

My reconciliation to the Divine is your reconciliation. None of us arrive fully home until the last one of us arrives fully home. The experiment isn’t over until it’s over.

The greatest of evildoers, those seemingly the furthest removed from the light, are actually souls with the deepest trust to take on the darkest parts of love’s mission. To see this any other way, to see an evildoer as an ‘evildoer’ is to leave ourselves excluded from reconciliation, from completing the circle of love’s mission. For if I’m not as bad as Jeffery Epstein or Hitler, then I can only lay claim to that claim by measuring myself on the yardstick of good and evil. My claim can only be a claim of not being that evil.

Perfect? No, but not ‘that’ evil. Sorry, but perfect only accepts perfect.

This leaves the judged and the judge both outside of perfection, and for the duration of that sentence, both in the same jail. This leaves the All One, you and I, alone, somewhere on the same yardstick that measures separation from perfection. Here we are, in our two track reality, perfect beings, in our perceived imperfection, reconciled, but yet, for all intents and purposes, awaiting reconciliation.

This state of relationship between us and other, between us and The Divine, is also mirrored exactly inside of us where parts of ourselves are left in 4D hell of separation, awaiting the love ambassador that you are to show up, and begin a magical reconciliation process.

Love changed everything and love keeps on changing everything. We are that change. Love is just having its own fun, and we are all invited into it, where no pain is denied, no level of hell on earth, but is instead felt profoundly in the minutest detail of hurt and separation for the portal that it is, for what it restores in us and to us, even expanding on the perfect love that originally undertook such a quest, as only infinite love can do.

We are perfection, improving on perfection.

Raphael Awen is co-creator, teacher, and facilitator of the SoulFullHeart Way Of Life.  Visit soulfullheart.org for more information about sessions, events, videos, etc. 

Healing To Access Love Flow

Letting Love in is to let Love flow. To let Love flow is to open up to all possibility, to our vulnerability. I felt myself a bit constricted this morning after being in so much goodness. It is an interesting mechanism to keep feeling.

As I bring my awareness to the part of me that is still needing to govern the flow of Love, I feel compassion and to say ‘I Love You’ even in the constriction. In that, they loosen. My masculine and feminine. They see each other anew. Not in conflict, but in union to open the curtains more to let in and let out the flow of Divine Love that is inherent in us all. Universal and Eternal.

Feeling leads to alchemical healing. Healing opens the gates to more Love, more Truth, more Joy, more Passion, more Intimacy. The Infinite at our doorstep.

*****

Gabriel Heartman is a SoulFullHeart Facilitator and Collaborator.  Visit https://www.soulfullheartorg.com for more information about sessions, group calls/events, videos, community, etc.

Karma As Love Discovering Itself

By Raphael Awen

When we hear about karma, we hear it through our collective conditioning and it lands in us as something akin to punishment, or the universe paying you back with like for like, to teach you a lesson, with a big finger wagging thrown in.

What if what we call karma is actually about your soul’s choice to work certain themes of realization and discovery, and thus the theme is recapitulating itself in your current timeline, wanting to bring you goodness rather than any kind of loss?

The Sanskrit origin of the word is ‘action, work, deed and fate’ telling us something about how our actions, work, and deeds are powerful creators that generate a ‘fate’ – a ‘thing spoken by the gods’. Here, the ‘god’ is you and I, and the arena of manifestation is our lives.

Our Higher Self doesn’t see difficulty in the same way we do, as only something to be avoided or overcome, but sees it as a motivator for us to realize in real time the reality of love. The divine itself needed to participate in something less than love, so it created duality as a way to discover itself, and the divine does that through you and I. Our mistakes are grand experiments of learning and feeling what the divine couldn’t feel and appreciate in the way it wanted to. Our realizations are dramatizations of love that love needed to discover itself.

When you feel that appreciation, you feel the whole point of the karma, which is all about more, not less, about gratitude, not entitlement, about love, not fear.

Jelelle Awen and I will be exploring this subject of Karma on Wednesday’s (June 16th) group call where we’ll look at the even bigger picture of your Metasoul along with your Gatekeeper and how karmic patterns can be felt and healed in a quantum way, affecting all of your timelines, including your life as currently know it.

Please join us if this calls to you. Details at soulfullheart.org/events.

Much love,
Raphael
SoulFullHeart.org

Photo courtesy of https://unsplash.com/@simonmigaj Thank you!

Raphael Awen is co-creator, teacher, and facilitator of the SoulFullHeart Way Of Life.  Visit soulfullheart.org for more information about sessions, events, videos, etc. 

Letting In And Letting Go To Experience ‘Abundance’

by Kalayna Solais

Letting in what IS, the dreams that ARE coming true, the love that IS flowing now while feeling grateful for all of it; feeling desires for what could be but perhaps isn’t present in your life yet, without attachment to having or keeping; letting go of what doesn’t resonate to make room for what does, without compromise, even as there are practical and grounded choices to make too…

Dancing with abundance is so multi-layered, that the process of feeling your parts’ reactions and responses to it, is abundant in itself! It’s a letting in of dreams and desires, while feeling what still needs to clear inside of you and in your life to make room for that to come to fruition. It’s also a process of feeling yourself and your life, where you are and who you are right NOW… really seeing yourself and all that you’ve earned, worked hard for, manifested, and drawn into your life in a positive way with much gratitude, even though there are ongoing and sometimes growing needs and dreams to fulfill.

When I feel my life as it is now, I feel the abundance I’ve drawn, but what gets challenging is feeling the parts of me and Metasoul aspects who are still a bit restless. When I feel into this some more, I can see us all standing on the bridge between ‘abundance’ and ‘scarcity’, where I feel we’ve mostly been hanging out for a few years now. We now cross the bridge into ‘abundance’ more often than ever before, but the scarcity consciousness surfaces in these parts and aspects from time to time.

Old fears, old pain, old ways of seeing and being in the world come up again to be felt. I can feel now when it’s something ‘old’ and I don’t feel judgement of that, only curiosity about who it is inside of me that is carrying that energy still, and how I can help them live more in the present. My parts, I’ve realized, are integrating more these days and when they aren’t integrated, they aren’t always in ‘pain’, just needing a check-in like a dear friend who is bothered by something perhaps or just wants some love exchanged with them. All of this needs to be felt and acknowledged though so that it continues to heal. And as it continues to heal, it makes room for the experiences we all DO want that are truly new and truly abundant.

‘Abundance’ is less and less about material wealth or money, though this comes up for me as well at times. Yet, in these shifting times we’re in, ‘money’ as we’ve known it may be in its final death blows. This leaves us all with a need to feel what’s been underneath our attachment to it and how to receive/use it ‘wisely’ or ‘responsibly’. You could say this about anything you receive though, couldn’t you? Love is held as another important currency that 3D teaches us ‘to spend wisely/responsibly’ when it conditions us on how to ‘get and keep love’ and all the ways in which it tells us what we do and do not deserve to have in relationships of any kind or within ourselves, even.

When I see the ‘abundance’ in my life now… I see the love I get to have within me and exchange with others. I see how it’s been such a deep process for me over many years now of feeling where love does and doesn’t flow within me and that then informs the flow of love that I am able to experience/let in on the outside. Abundance really does start inside, just as anything you want to draw into your life… and, as always, it’s about fully having/receiving what is available to us now, even though there are genuine aches to experience or have more too.

I, for one, would love to have, experience, be IN the abundance of Sacred Union and everything that flows in every area of my life when I am in one. Yet, for now, I’m invited to feel the robust and ever-growing INNER Sacred Union, the dance that there is within me between my own Inner Masculine and Feminine. It’s yet another flow that has to start from within… and will eventually be drawn on the outside too.

Whatever your current ‘currency’ is in your life now in your life circumstances as they are, spend/receive/let go/let in with love all that IS now and all that WILL BE as you continue your own process into everything ‘abundance’ truly and deeply means to you… ❤

***

Kalayna Solais is a Love Ambassador, SoulFullHeart Women’s Facilitator & collaborator, soul scribe, and poetess.  Visit https://www.soulfullheart.org for more information about space holding sessions, group calls, videos, community, etc. 

Deeper Intimacy With Self Through The Explorations With Money

By Deya Shekinah

Wow, what a topic money is. I feel so many layers and parts wrapped into the explorations with money. One of the things that Jelelle Awen offered in the SoulFullHeart Free To Be Two group call about money this week, was how some can relate to money as a false god. This landed straight away as what I experienced within my family, how earning money gave meaning to life and felt like the only meaning to life as there was no spirituality or religion in my upbringing. I feel how my Inner Masculine, David, took this on and how my Inner Child, Yazzy, was stifled by this. Since she was always so multi dimensional, she didn’t believe this to be true, but as there was no one bringing any other meaning, she became capped by that.

I remembered a time when a male family member said to me that ‘money is the only thing that matters in the world’. At the time, I was blown away that anyone could believe that. As I feel it now, I feel so much density in that picture of our world, the lack of joy or spaciousness in it. As I feel David, I sense this energy within him as the conditioning he received from birth family members. 

Right now I am in a transition into a new way of being and earning money, that is bringing light to David’s relationship to money.  I hold and feel a lot of trust around money after years of transitioning and exploring money. This transition has grown into a deeper awareness and understanding of a greater meaning of life, as well as what abundance looks and feels like to me. 

I have learnt that abundance is many things. Not only money, but time, connection, vulnerability with others, space to BE. These all feel like abundance to me. I am coming to know and feel that my inner feeling of abundance is what draws abundance on the outside including financial abundance, even as that is still growing. For David, I feel him seeing this abundance coming in and seeing money coming in for offering my Soul Gifts, but he still does not FEEL abundant.

The group call has helped me feel this with him, his reality more of distrust and lack that he has been in and learnt throughout this 3D experience, sure that has been the 3D experience. One of the core beliefs I feel held in David is, ‘there is never enough money’., I see how much this creates that reality for us because he is so focused on ‘there is never enough’. He cannot appreciate or acknowledge it as it is coming in. I feel how it is the ability to be grateful for what IS, in the moment, that draws more of that thing to you, which of course is a journey, not something you can create through bypassing feeling the lack of gratitude. 

I feel how this lack of money belief is actually a cover up for lack of love, connection, communication and boundaries, it feels like. Money becomes this huge focal point when there is no other meaning to life. Money has become this huge elephant in the room, where we think about it, worry about it, are anxious about it, but we do not really honestly talk about it, at least in my experience and in this culture of my current geography. The shame, the guilt, the resentment around money is of course going to make it heavy and joyless. This feels like it creates blocks to, and a push/pull within us and our relationship to money, as well as abundance in general. 

I feel the lack of joy the Inner Masculine can hold around life in general, which then seeps into his relationship with/to everything else in life. I feel David feeling joyless, I feel him longing to experience joy as my other parts do, his sadness that he cannot seem to meet them there. Yet I feel how no one has ever asked him what he likes, what the meaning of his life is, and how he has been disempowered throughout this 3D experience too.

So now there is this new ground to walk out with him, where he is included and wanted, where he gets to feel and heal too because he is valued by me through this process. So this is where talking about money leads us, perhaps not straight away to more money, although I feel that coming in but to deeper connection, understanding and intimacy with our parts, and with each other eventually too.

You can purchase the recording of this Free To Be Two group call about money and attendance at/recordings of future group calls in this series by offering a donation of any amount. More information at soulfullheart.org/freetobe2.

Love,

Deya & David

Deya Shekinah is a SoulFullHeart Collaborator & Facilitant. Visit https://www.soulfullheartwayoflife.com for more information about space holding sessions, group calls, videos, community, etc

Becoming Conscious To Our Relationship To Money As Love

The first topic in our upcoming SoulFullHeart Free To Be series (beginning tomorrow) is about money and soul purpose work. It feels like an important piece to feel through, especially during these very volatile times. 

There are so many facets to money and our relationship to it, like a multi-headed hydra. It is called a ‘necessary evil’. It is said to be the ‘root of all evil’. There is no doubt money itself has a big impact on our lives. It is the 3D currency of exchange…for now. A big topic right now is that of a UBI, or Universal Basic Income, as well as a Global Currency Reset. These things are certainly making their way through consciousness, yet they are not here in the physical quite yet. 

Instead of going into the minutiae of these specific ideas and plans, I wish to turn the spotlight inward. What is your current relationship to money? Let’s take the paper and digits out of the equation and focus on the energy and feeling. 

Money represents basic survival in its lowest common denominator. This could be held by our more 3D parts such as the inner mother/father, Inner Protector, or even the Inner Teenager if they had to be self-sufficient at an early age. All of these parts have their own concerns and needs that tend to go to a very existential place. Meeting them there helps to get to a bedrock of existence that has been projected onto money itself. 

Energetically, with that fear in our field, the ebb and flow of money itself will morph to that narrative and belief system. It will make the case for this part of you that it is scarce and difficult to attain. If you dig deeper, you may find that what these parts of you are really after is to feel loved. For what we really want is more than just to survive. It is to feel alive and it is Love that provides that, not money ultimately. 

This may be compounded by many Metasoul lifetimes that are currently living in scarcity, poverty, and/or squalor. Meeting these aspects and bringing them into a higher love frequency, held by You and your Higher Self, can help the flood of these energies into your Now. 

One way to get to some bedrock places around your relationship to money is by completing a simple sentence frame in as many different ways that come to you. They may seem varied because each part of us holds a different relationship to it. You can parse that out later but for now just write.

Money always….

Money never….

Now those are very polarized sentences but it is on purpose. It is meant to draw that out if it lives inside of you. An exercise like this really helps to separate You from your Reaction. The Reaction is a fused state of consciousness. It is really unconscious. As you take a step back you begin to actually become more conscious of it. THIS is where your power is. Not so much how you can earn more or get more but how you relate to it that really gets the wheels of manifestation greased. An interesting thing to do when you are done is to replace the word ‘money’ with ‘Love’ and see what happens. 

Love and money are strange bedfellows. They seem like they live in different universes let alone galaxies. The thing is everything lives within the domain of Love. Money, sex, violence, joy, bliss, scarcity, abundance, and, yes, evil. The quest is, can we start to unravel the story that parts of us have fused to around money and truly feel we live in Providence…the state of being provided for by The Divine. If we find ourselves gripping on money, we need to feel the part of us that does not believe that Providence exists. 

This is my journey as well. It is ongoing. I want to go on it with you. If you feel this push-pull around money and living in a world of purpose, joy, and providence then please join us on the call tomorrow. It aims to shed light on this very human story.

You can join us live for this call and/or receive the recordings if you can’t make it live by offering ANY donation at soulfullheart.org/shop or paypal.me/jelelleawen. You will also then be able to attend and/or receive the recordings of the next FIVE group calls in the series! The content is laid out here: soulfullheart.org/freetobe2

*****

Gabriel Heartman is a SoulFullHeart Facilitant and Collaborator.  Visit https://www.soulfullheartorg.com for more information about sessions, group calls/events, videos, community, etc.

Welcoming The Peaks And Valleys Of Awakening

by Raphael Awen

You can have what you want. That’s not actually the question.

The bigger question is about being ready to have what you want.

A part of you may readily say ‘oh, believe me, I’m ready! I’m so ready, I’m getting both depressed and impatient waiting to have what I really want.’

But this is only taking into consideration one part of you. Other parts of you can be just off your radar and actively resisting you (or what we call ‘you’) as they are not interested at all in these big changes ‘you’ feel you are so ready for. This resistive part of you is not something you can control, but it is something that you are responsible for, and something that you need to become responsive to.

Then, there is also another aspect of you, that is probably also just off your radar and that is your higher self. Your higher self may have chosen a preferred path of difficulty and going without something that another part of you deeply desires in order to learn and grow through a difficulty. It wouldn’t actually be a growth crucible without this tension between what ‘you’ want and don’t want. Your higher self is also something you cannot control, but it is something you are responsible for and that you also need to become more responsive to.

You are not a victim. Your life as you know it now is shaped by you, and the life you will come to know in the future is also shaped by you.

Your life as it is right now, warts and all, is perfect in the midst of imperfection. You are perfect while growing and learning. All the angst, pain and confusion is sacred. You had so much heaven that you needed to dial up hell in order to grow. Your soul loved the heaven it knew, but it also wanted more, and it knew the path to more was though the tension of less.

Consciously letting go of reaching for peak experiences and instead welcoming your awaiting valley experiences is what your soul may be asking of you. You may have very much needed your awakening experiences that happened through the peak experiences to let you know what is possible and what awaits you. But now, your soul wants you to let go of what a part of you may be be in danger of becoming quite addicted to, in order now to more consciously connect to what you actually came here for.

Whether conscious or not, you can’t escape growth. Growth is built into the DNA of the universe that you are a part of. While you can’t escape growth, you can accept your awakening to what is, and even the need to mourn the loss of your deep night’s rest in the 3D fusion of unconsciousness.

Now, as you are awakening, you are offered a conscious choice that your path up, is a path down. The downward path is a matter of feeling all there is to feel that you were not able to feel while asleep in 3D consciousness.

This will involve feeling crappy on a regular basis for a good amount of time. If this isn’t an option for ‘you’, then you are not yet ready for this deeper more conscious path of healing, but you can be assured, all of us will be invited and re-invited to return here just as soon and we are ready to. It is what we came here for. We came here to ascend with all of us, without any ‘lesser’ parts of us left behind being punished for any insubordination, or for just not getting the program.

Time now to look at what we’ve called ‘spiritual practices’ to feel where they are actually about transcending in the name of ascending, where they are about not feeling, rather than true healing.

We all come eventually to having what we most deeply want, with the fullest and deepest bliss that we can’t quite imagine. We are living our way to being able to imagine it as we feel and heal the parts of us still in deep pain that were covered over with our positive spirituality agendas.

Time now for a negative spirituality agenda that sees it all as sacred.

Raphael Awen

~

Raphael Awen is co-creator, teacher, and facilitator of the SoulFullHeart Way Of Life.  Visit soulfullheartwayoflife.com for more information about sessions, events, videos, etc. 

Living Below Your Birthright

By Raphael Awen

Working for anything that is yours by birthright is a form of resistance to that thing, allowing a part of you to hide its resistance while appearing like it actually wants the pursued thing, usually to maintain social acceptance.

‘Working for a living’ for instance is one of the biggest examples of this and misnomers out there. Living doesn’t occur by virtue of working. Living occurs by virtue of your essence, by virtue of your being.

Your being receives life and gives back to life in a natural economy of gift exchange. If you shortchange life in this natural exchange, that is, giving something less than your best, your true gifts, what you came here to give, and settle for a ‘job that pays the bills’ instead, you can be sure that life will respond to you in kind with a reflection of your ingratitude for what you are given. This is not any kind of punishment from an angry God or angry universe, but simply an invitation into an awareness of what your own alchemy is producing. An invitation in your innate more which you already possess.

You already are a powerful alchemy that is producing exactly as it was designed to, even if you are, like me, still consciously wanting to change or alter this alchemy.

Already encoded into you is every last provision you will ever need to fulfill every last detail of what you came here to do. If you are experiencing a drama of lack moving through your story at the moment, this too, is a provision of an invitation into an initiation of this more that you already are. This is a big opportunity to feel and heal parts of you still encoded in lack, while being submerged in a super-abundant free-energy universe, inside of an even greater multiverse.

While there is nothing to work for, in this way of earning or qualifying for anything, there is however, your necessary reach for what you want and desire, as the universe cannot successfully provide anything you aren’t willing to want or choose. The circuitry cannot complete without your desire, choice, intention, and your action.

So what feels like the need to work as in earning something, is actually more about the necessary effort involved in claiming your essence. It will take ‘work’ for instance to slowly get to know and love the part of you conditioned and convinced to a ‘working for a living’ reality, to let in this new reality, but this is a self loving kind of work that is pure joy and creative play to be with. The opposite of drudgery. A gift that keeps on giving.

We all have a lot to learn in entering this new reality, but it feels so exciting to lean into it more and more. I’ll take me a big chunk of that for 2020!

You are the light of the world, even in your darkness, a city set on a hill that cannot be hidden. The universe aches for your arising.

Raphael Awen
Soulfullheartwayoflife.Com/sessions

Photo by me taken at our favorite park close by!

Raphael Awen is co-creator, teacher, and facilitator of the SoulFullHeart Way Of Life.  Visit soulfullheartwayoflife.com for more information about sessions, events, videos, etc. Visit our Patreon Page to send us love in the form of money: https://www.patreon.com/soulfullheart 🙂

The Mutual Entanglement Of Victim And Perpetrator: Alive Daily Video Series | Raphael Awen

By Raphael Awen

Today’s Live: ‘The Mutual Entanglement Of Victim And Perpetrator’

In this video, I explore how we can embrace real forgiveness without paving over the part of us that does feel victimized and traumatized.

Here is the full Alive Series Playlist: https://tinyurl.com/uaghll3

Info about the free Intro call to sessions with myself: https://www.soulfullheartwayoflife.com/sessions

Become a one-time or monthly donor and patron to support SoulFullHeart and our expression through videos, writings, and more! https://www.patreon.com/soulfullheart

Raphael Awen
Soulfullheartwayoflife.Com/sessions

Raphael Awen is co-creator, teacher, and facilitator of the SoulFullHeart Way Of Life.  Visit soulfullheartwayoflife.com for more information about sessions, events, videos, etc. Visit our Patreon Page to send us love in the form of money: https://www.patreon.com/soulfullheart 🙂