You Are Your Own Sovereign

By  Raphael Awen

You are your own sovereign.

There’s no one above you. Your power is yours by right of being. It cannot be taken away. It cannot be transferred to another by force or by gift.

But there’s also no one below you. You don’t have power ‘over’ any-one or any-thing. All the ones and things around you are equally sovereign, by right of their being.

So what’s the value in sovereignty then, if I can’t feel powerful, and command or demand over something?

The value is found in the shared experience. We are all equal sovereigns, lords of our own kingdoms and queendoms. The only company that we could ever truly enjoy is with our own kind – Kings and Queens.

Only those who possess this kind of sovereignty can experience true surrender. True surrender is an even deeper sharing in this profound kind of knowing that my power is mine, and only I can lay it down and pick it up at will, when and as I choose.

Surrender is a most powerful expression of our power.

True surrender is not the same thing at all as what we’ve called ‘giving away your power’. Your ownership of your power cannot be signed over to another. It can only be denied or disowned by you as long as you are unaware of your power.

But you are re-membering now. The dis-membering that preceded this remembrance was all about a full circle learning curve to come to terms with the infinite power you hold, and always did.

How does this remembrance that’s happening now want to express in your life as you know it right now?

What choices are before you asking for your most honest truth? Who and what in your life needs to be informed of that truth? What manner will you assume as you share that truth that isn’t about the old grounds of power or dominance over others, making them feel small and controlled?

Now, you are in true humble worthiness surrender territory. You’ve surrendered your choices and truth declaration to the world around you, and you’re ready to accept their truth declaration and choices in return, that may well be to your loss, the loss of something you’ve worked hard up till now to not lose.

They may not want to or be ready to take the journey you are taking. Their time and manner of remembrance may not be in sync with yours. You are choosing to let go a kind of false power over them of pretending to be in resonance with them when in fact, the ground underneath your relationship has been getting smaller and smaller of late, leading to this choice point that arises now in your shared story together.

You acknowledge your oneness with them and your utter  inseparability with them by breaking off contact with them as you know and feel that nothing real can be lost.

Here we see and feel the shared sovereignty reality. We wondered how there could be a room full of Kings and Queens without any subjects to make it all real. Now we see and feel that we are all subjects of the Kings and Queens that surround us on all sides. You are a complete sovereign in relationship with complete and total sovereigns.

You surrender to that with the ownership of your sovereignty, as you hold it in love, in surrender, in deep humility, in the willingness to let go of what no longer serves you or them.

When you find yourself feeling dominated or lorded over by any kind of power, be it social pressure, 3D governmental power structures or people in authority, spiritual teachers, or your boss at work, you are being invited to feel the power of your choice that can never be taken from you.

Even if you end up in prison, feeling most of your freedoms taken from you, you are invited to feel the power over your own being that is yours and yours alone. This power doesn’t need security fences or noisy alarm systems to protect it, for it cannot be taken away or lost. When you know this in life, you know it in any and all circumstances, and it radiates to everyone around you boldly, even to your jailers if that is the circumstance you find yourself in.

The entire world awaits this awakening in you. Jailers, kings, queens, philosophers and ploughmen, each must play their part in their own awakening, spurred on by your awakening.

There’s only one of us ultimately, so there cannot be anyone above or below. This one of us needs to remember its own power simultaneously through your and my individual remembrance of it. None of us get to be fully home until all of us are fully home, again because there is only one of us.

You get to be a forerunner in all of this if you’d like to be, a shower of the way. It will however call for the ongoing surrender of many things, things you once held onto dearly and even fiercely in the process of learning what power and sovereignty is not.

This is what makes it real, what makes it royal, is that you as a King and as a Queen give up false power to truly serve the loyal subjects that surround you towards the awakening to their own sovereignty.

Anyone who tries to suppress the power of those around them will forever be surrounded by stunted beings, reflecting to them their own seemingly inescapable smallness of being.

Anyone who champions the power of the individual around them, will forever be surrounded by testaments of their own true power and sovereignty.

This is the story, the drama that is unfolding on the stage before us now. You and I are the actors, the playwrights, the audience, the investors putting in the capital, and the janitor who must clean up after the show.

This is the dharma in our drama right now. You are the examplar and the sampler. This is the greatest story ever told.

Much love,

Raphael Awen

I’d like to invite any man here to the men’s group call that I’m leading with Gabriel Gabriel Amara and joined by James Elphick on this subject ‘Sovereignty and Surrender’ on zoom on Saturday, April 24th at 5pm BST (London time, 9am Pacific and Noon Eastern). We ask for a donation of any amount to join in or to receive the recording. During the 2 hour call, we will share teaching together, lead a guided meditation to connect with your true sovereignty and surrender, as well as have space on the call for men who’d like to share or receive reflection.

You can send a donation over PayPal here: https://www.paypal.me/jelelleawen

Or make your donation to join in through our shop here: https://www.soulfullheart.org/shop

And I will forward the Zoom link from there when I see your donation.

All the details to join in are here: https://www.soulfullheart.org/mensgroupcalls

Jelelle and I are also hosting a group call the week before the men’s call mentioned above on Sunday, April 18th called ‘Digesting the covid narrative’. That’s this coming Sunday, and I’d love to have you join in to that also if you feel called.

Details for the above group call with Jelelle Awen and I are here: https://www.soulfullheart.org/grouptransmissions

We are leading like minds and hearts into their own power while being in deepening proximity and connection and nourishment.

Raphael Awen is co-creator, teacher, and facilitator of the SoulFullHeart Way Of Life.  Visit soulfullheart.org for more information about sessions, events, videos, etc. 

We are now offering our SoulFullHeart Portal on Mighty Networks, a private virtual gathering place for sharing exclusive content from us such as energy update writings and guided meditation videos, plus community forum threads with topics and groups that you can read, join, and contribute to as you want. You can join us at the SoulFullHeart Portal for a membership fee of $14.99 USD a month: soulfullheartportal.mn.co/

You Can’t Schedule A Funeral And A Wedding In A Chapel On The Same Day!

By  Raphael Awen

Having fun and working at having fun are two different things.

One is play, and the other isn’t.

What if we stopped working at having fun and instead just admitted to ourselves and our world that we weren’t having fun.

Well, that would be tantamount to suicide, to letting go, to giving up.

And God forbid we should give up, because there’s always hope right?

Right?

What if the situation at hand is beyond hope, at least in the dimension that that situation exists?

That’s called death.

And no one wants to talk about that.

And that has a lot to do with our working at having fun, which by its very nature, excludes fun, though it is hung onto for its value of distraction, and staying engaged, lest we give up.

What is life and love is wanting to give up?

That’s called surrender.

But surrender feels so powerless to us, so ending and so final, so we hang onto remnants of lookalike hope and pretend fun, even as those remnants evaporate in front of us.

I do believe however that the universe is wired for fun, and it goes through phases of fun and not fun, letting in and letting out, and in this way comes to know itself in ever expanding discovery, reverence, magic, play, joy and wonder.

We are collectively and personally smack dab in a big shedding phase, a dying phase. If you’re wondering why you’re less than joyful, if not depressed, it’s because you are, but can’t admit it. Admission is that surrender.

All the good stuff hasn’t gone anywhere, but it is kind of waiting in the wings, mostly out of sight, while the death moves through. You can’t schedule a funeral and a wedding in the same chapel on the same day.

When I feel the horrors of the COVID situation and the agenda and narrative, and feel out beyond the distracting drum beats of pro-vax vs. anti-vax, there is something much more reverential going on.

Something is dying. It’s beyond any shadow of a doubt. Life is ending – a form of life; life as we’ve known it. This involves suffering and pain. Love always wants to minimize that suffering and pain, even as it accepts it as a necessary part of the journey.

It’s time to feel the loss, to grieve what’s dying all around us. I believe there will be much physical loss of life and deep losses to the quality of life for so many.

Even if you live outside of the 3D medical world reality and have a healthy immune system, which makes you a bright shining light, this light that you are is about to be called upon to shine in deeper depths of unfolding darkness.

If you actually feel, rather than just fight, or conversely play dead, this means deep sadness, mourning, grieving. Tears.

If you are willing to grieve, then you are both a death doula and a birth doula, aiding in this epic shift in consciousness that we as souls chose to be a part of in this time.

How did we get convinced that we would or could return to truly having fun without admitting that what we are in now isn’t fun?

God, please spare yourself from the horrors of the jab if you’re wavering in any way around being a part of that, but spare yourself from adding to the death at hand, and adding to the avoidance of feeling that death by beating drumbeats of war. Save yourself for the mourning and the morning after.

Love has got this all in hand, but it’s up to you to decide and choose your role to play. There’s that word again. It’s all play.

Love has put on a play. You’re invited onto the stage as an actor and into the audience as one receiving the wave form, auditing the reality into your being.

The light or the darkness you bear on this stage are equally necessary and needful to the story and its plot.

The plotters will surely need our forgiveness if they are ever to find their self forgiveness and complete their return to love journey that we are all on as one of us.

That’s the bigger deal, there’s only one of us. Regardless of how awoke you are, how much light you bear, you are part of The One and this One includes darkness and light.

That One is entering a hell portal to get to the heaven it also is, and in the process to expand it out to more than it ever was.

If you are ready to feel this, you are creating for yourself and for love, a sustainable sanctuary where you can return to love and play, come what may.

Much Love,

Raphael

Join Jelelle Awen and I for our next group meditation call ‘One Year Later – Navigating The Covid Narrative’ on Sunday, April 18th at 5:00pm BST by donation. More info at soulfullheart.org/events

We offer 1:1 sessions to explore into your calling and role at the personal and soul level in a safe container and with a process that allows for deeper integration and embodiment….more info at soulfullheart.org/sessions

Photo is yesterday at the Solomon Stone at Glastonbury Abbey, feeling the energies of death and rebirth.

Raphael Awen is co-creator, teacher, and facilitator of the SoulFullHeart Way Of Life.  Visit soulfullheart.org for more information about sessions, events, videos, etc. 

We are now offering our SoulFullHeart Portal on Mighty Networks, a private virtual gathering place for sharing exclusive content from us such as energy update writings and guided meditation videos, plus community forum threads with topics and groups that you can read, join, and contribute to as you want. You can join us at the SoulFullHeart Portal for a membership fee of $14.99 USD a month: soulfullheartportal.mn.co/

You Are Invited! Men’s Group Calls Each Month

By  Raphael Awen

Quick video invitation to join myself, Aurius Amara and James Elphick this Saturday, March 27 at 5pm GMT (London time) for our Men’s group call on the topic of ‘Adequacy, Power and Vulnerability’.

We ask for a donation of any amount to set your intention and exchange with us. Read on/listen in to get the tone and see where to sign up. We very much welcome your curiosity and hope you join us.

How do you as a man relate to your sense of power in the world?

How does that make you feel either adequate or inadequate?

Where would vulnerability factor into the expression of your power and sense of adequacy?

As men, we can be quick to embrace anything that affords us a sense of adequacy and power, and slow to let go of anything that feels like it will lessen that comfort zone. Even what we reach towards in spiritual or community settings can be so tailored to this need to buffer this feeling of ‘getting ahead’ in this way.

But where do we find the pause button long enough to explore the more vulnerable questions about whether a choice or endeavour or relationship is really what we most deeply want? How do we know if we are choosing our growth vs. our comfort zone?

‘What is it that you really want?’ is maybe the most profound question that you as a man need to ask yourself, as well as the most sorting question that can be asked when it comes to relationships. Your wanter is already leading and guiding the way, what’s left is become familiar with your wanter – the part of you currently leading your wants and wishes.

In SoulFullHeart, we offer a way to get to know and feel the parts of you that are oriented to life in this way without judging them in any way. Here begins an exit off the treadmill of ‘shoulds’ where even the prescription to be more real or more vulnerable can be related to as a higher form of attaining adequacy or power.

These are the questions we will explore together, offer teaching, and transparent personal reflections about our journey in this men’s group call on Saturday, March 27th hosted by SoulFullHeart Teachers/Facilitators and Sacred Masculine bridges Raphael Awen and Aurius Amara. We will also be joined by James Elphick, who is an active member of the Soulfullheart community. The three of us currently live in close proximity and shared purpose in Glastonbury, England, also known as Avalon, the heart chakra of Gaia.

During the call, we will also enter a time of guided meditation to meet your Inner Protector, the part of you that has the most domain when it comes to your adequacy, power and vulnerability. Just meeting this part of you, getting a feeling sense of them for the first time or the hundredth time is what opens out the deep heart and soul places that you have been wanting to venture into. In other words, the key to your dreams is not more will power, or more adequacy, but instead you showing up to get to know these parts of you who feel so much about your life, your dreams, your regrets, etc. As this happens more and more, your life gets to enter new configurations in all areas of your life, because it’s shifting on the inside.

The call will be at 5pm/17:00 GMT (London, UK timezone/12 Noon EST/9:00am PST) and hosted over Zoom. The call will be 2 hours in duration.

You can join us live (highly recommended) or take in the recording afterwards. If you attend the group live, you’ll have the opportunity to share with us about what you experienced during the meditation and receive feedback/next steps of integration from us.

This group is open to the public and to all men over 18. You can attend the group and/or receive the recording for an energy exchange of whatever donation you feel to give. You can purchase the Zoom link to join us live for the group and receive the recording through your email at soulfullheart.org/shop

Or you can make a donation for it here through Paypal: paypal.me/raphaelawen

We will send you the zoom link via email.

Please make a note in the Paypal transaction that you are purchasing the March 27th Men’s Group Call and check that your email on Paypal is current, as this is the email we will send the zoom link to unless you request it sent to another email.

The call will last a max of two hours depending on those that want to share their experiences and ask questions.

Here is a timezone converter (call is at 5:00pm GMT London, London time): https://www.timeanddate.com/worldclock/converter.html

For more info or to share with a friend:

– Here is the Facebook Event Listing: https://www.facebook.com/events/427115595032366

https://www.soulfullheart.org/mensgroupcalls

Very warmly,

Raphael Awen, Aurius Amara and James Elphick

Raphael Awen is co-creator, teacher, and facilitator of the SoulFullHeart Way Of Life.  Visit soulfullheart.org for more information about sessions, events, videos, etc. 

We are now offering our SoulFullHeart Portal on Mighty Networks, a private virtual gathering place for sharing exclusive content from us such as energy update writings and guided meditation videos, plus community forum threads with topics and groups that you can read, join, and contribute to as you want. You can join us at the SoulFullHeart Portal for a membership fee of $14.99 USD a month: soulfullheartportal.mn.co/

What Does Masculine Power, Adequacy And Vulnerabilty Look Like?

By  Raphael Awen

I venture to say that as a man, regardless of your age, or circumstance in life, that underlying everything you are dealing with in life are the issues of adequacy, power and vulnerability.

These are the core issues that issue from the core of a man, that make up the masculine journey.

And these core issues don’t go away as you grow or become self aware, only your relationship to them changes, and that then is what changes everything, while you continue your journey.

Without these issues, that issue from the core of the heart, there would be no masculine journey, no reason for being here. 

Surrendering to that is what makes you a man. Aligning with others who are becoming conscious of the same journey is what affords you a sense of your true value and worth as a man.

Vulnerability is admitting that short of that, you at best have a half life, and remain in a pact with your suffering.

Those kinds of admissions and surrender is what makes you a powerful being, ever arising into more.

All of your problems and issues get to now be portals into the deeper essence of your being.

Your issues have everything to do with your essence.

If what I am speaking is landing in you as true or powerful, then I offer to you that what you are feeling is your truth, your seat of being, resonating with mine. You are feeling and hearing from the seat of your own authority and sovereignty within, rather than accepting being dominated by any control or permission outside of you.

The question of the quest becomes how will you respond. What will you choose? The choices are before you.

There’s the choice to get real, the choice to get vulnerable, the choice partake of huge support all around you.

The masculine journey is ultimately a sacred one, whether you choose it or don’t, because in the long, long run, it all comes together back to love and essence. The difference is not sacred or secular, holy or unholy, conscious or unconscious, awakened or unawakened; the choice is about getting real or not.

Being real has everything to do with adequacy, power and vulnerability. And getting real will surely lead to the need to get more real – a herein lies the courage required to embrace the journey, and the gratitude of the divine for your choice, to feel and heal what the divine could not inside of itself, without you, and your ‘issues’.

I wrote all that to offer you an invite, one choice if you will, that may be the one for you and your journey as a man right now, and that is an invite to be a part of this coming Saturday, March 27 at 5pm GMT (London Time) Group Call For Men hosted by myself, Aurius Amara along with James Elphick. The topic is Power, Adequacy, and Vulnerability.

Go here for more details and to sign up: www.soulfullheart.org/mensgroupcalls

We ask for a donation of any amount to attend live or to receive the recording after, to show your intention and exchange, and to honour the space shared with other like minded men.

The call will be a max of 2 hours in a very well hosted and timed zoom call with teachings and reflections from myself, Aurius and James, as well as hearing from other men on the call who choose to share. Aurius and I will also offer about a 20 minute guided meditation during the call to meet your Inner Protector, who is the part of you that holds your relationship to your power, adequacy and vulnerability.

More info also here at https://www.facebook.com/events/427115595032366 if you’d like to invite someone special.

Aurius and myself both offer 1:1 sessions with men as well if you feel drawn and more about that is here: https://www.soulfullheart.org/sessions

Much Love,

Raphael

The pic above is from the Solomon Stone yesterday at The Abbey here in Glastonbury. The stone is believed to be brought here by Joseph of Arimathea in the first century and came from the ruins of Solomon’s temple. I’m there receiving the download and the seed of the sacred masculine impartation – getting ready to host you on Saturday’s call. 🙂

Raphael Awen is co-creator, teacher, and facilitator of the SoulFullHeart Way Of Life.  Visit soulfullheart.org for more information about sessions, events, videos, etc. 

We are now offering our SoulFullHeart Portal on Mighty Networks, a private virtual gathering place for sharing exclusive content from us such as energy update writings and guided meditation videos, plus community forum threads with topics and groups that you can read, join, and contribute to as you want. You can join us at the SoulFullHeart Portal for a membership fee of $14.99 USD a month: soulfullheartportal.mn.co/

Are You Up For Some Sex Talk?

By  Raphael Awen

Jelelle and I have our next group call coming up on Sunday the 14th entitled Sacred Sexuality, and I want to invite you.

Okay, that was a bit of a ploy. Pardon the grabby come on, but the purpose of this writing is to draw people who might be interested in the call, so I thought it best to be in full disclosure right from the get go.

Can I ask you, how has life been for you as a sexual being? How do you at present relate to your sexuality?

Whether your experiences have been deeply negative or out of this world positive, both are a lot to bear in this mystery of our sexuality.

That you and I came into this life with this awakening need and desire of sexuality along with its potential for both the deepest fulfillments and the deepest disappointments really points to the vulnerability of our souls choosing to be in human incarnation. 

For me, my teenage awakening into my sexuality was marked with fears and hiding that I effectively suppressed by taming it alongside a Christian dedication to God and Christian service. I embraced the no sex before marriage advice, partly out of my fear of my own sexuality and partly of wanting God’s blessing and sense of safety on something I felt to be so potentially unknown, destructive and harmful. I managed to enter my first marriage as a virgin and experienced a bandwidth of sexuality that felt right for where I was at and what I could handle. From a soul perspective, I can see where this muting of my sexuality was motivated from other timelines of sexual regrets and remorse. 

When I left Christianity, and that marriage of 23 years, I was surprised to find a very ripe and ready unexplored teenage sexual energy that was alive and well coming back into my life with me now in my mid 40’s. I knew I needed and wanted to explore and mature this sexual energy and life and the Divine opened out a couple of rich and rewarding relationships that surprised me by discovering whole new layers of the lover in me. 

This laid a whole new groundwork sexually and emotionally to be in relationship with Jelelle. I was given and continue to be given experiences that feel like such deep treasures and even trophies to me and parts of me. I’d like to support you to create your own heaven of sexuality. 

The journey of vulnerability, desire and beautiful experiences continued for me over the past 13 years together with Jelelle. Now, however, I especially feel another whole layer of sexual energy expanding out into an invitation into a much wider place that is beyond both the teenagers and the adult relationship with sexuality. 

I especially feel how the masculine’s relationship with adequacy and sexual prowess on one hand and then the strange behaviour of needing to get to orgasm, and to effectively close the sexual space are both energies that are rooted in our fears of our sexuality. We can shy away from our sexuality, or put it out there and bury it under a performance, but in both of these polarities we see and feel our uninitiated relationship with our own sexuality. 

I’m convinced now that I’m only scratching the surface of a much deeper terrain that wants to continue to reform and inform my life with this sexual energy in a way that relates to all areas of my life. Compartmentalized and contained sexuality is a safety measure that we maybe all needed while we did or do, but the invitation is for this sexual energy of mateship with all of life and love itself to overflow into this deep sexual union where there is no difference between the love of God, the love of other and the love of self. 

Every person you meet along with yourself was portaled into this world by sexual energy and they each contain vital sexual energy as a common denominator of aliveness, with shared fears, desires and for some of us trophy experiences – but all of it is wanting to take us yet much deeper into something so much more. Can I turn in my trophies and admit I want to keep going into more?

I’m horny for that more, more than just talk, but ongoing flow into the infinite more that we each are. I hope you are too. Any and all sexual traumas, desires, fears, yearnings, trophies, sorrows, are all a portal into this deep going on place in your soul’s journey this life. 

I hope you will consider joining us for the upcoming group call this Sunday at 5pm London time, that will be tailored to individuals and couples. We ask for a donation of any amount to join. Details below.  This call is also free to all members of our SoulFullHeart Portal private network which you can join for $14.99 USD per month, which also helps support our work.

Here is the link to the Facebook event if you’d like further info or to invite a friend: https://www.facebook.com/events/109338231107311

Here is the event on our website where you can reserve your spot by making a donation: https://www.soulfullheart.org/grouptransmissions

Raphael Awen is co-creator, teacher, and facilitator of the SoulFullHeart Way Of Life.  Visit soulfullheart.org for more information about sessions, events, videos, etc. 

We are now offering our SoulFullHeart Portal on Mighty Networks, a private virtual gathering place for sharing exclusive content from us such as energy update writings and guided meditation videos, plus community forum threads with topics and groups that you can read, join, and contribute to as you want. You can join us at the SoulFullHeart Portal for a membership fee of $14.99 USD a month: soulfullheartportal.mn.co/

A Common Challenge For Awakening Men

By  Raphael Awen

I had the pleasure of holding space for a man yesterday in session space over zoom and we encountered something together that feels really common for awakening men.

As he described some precious and powerful awakenings with Yeshua and many new places of openings recently, I couldn’t help but feel an anxious undertone in his sharing, so I just asked if he could feel a part of him that is vigilant about keeping up with awakening, and that opened out a whole portal to go into together where we felt and saw that the efforting and vigilance about awakening was being used to avoid an inner well of ‘persistent hollowness’. We were able to see and feel the part of him who lives in this hollowness and begin to see him as the one who holds vast access to creativity, as well as the men’s version of the womb, what’s known as the Hara.

This all felt so familiar to my own process of being out of touch with my own grief over the years, and with that of course, my own depression. I didn’t have any depression as near as I could tell, for decades actually, but truth was, part of me had just done an outstanding job of keeping it buried. I was quite a stellar human then, liked by many, but the treadmill of the efforting was starting to wear the benefits thin and the costs were tabulating.

I don’t think anything would have changed for me were it not for a crisis, and in some ways, an ongoing series of manageable mini crisis’ if you will.

Together in session with this man yesterday, we began to feel the call to really begin to bridge to this part of him, curiously and with open heart, get to know his reality. Negotiate with him to return out to play, not as another item on the to do list or the to be list of awakening, but just as a natural longing and appetite to get to know.

Then we felt THAT to be the ending of the efforting, as the efforting was actually being used to keep this part’s world and reality suppressed inside, when life is actually ripening this part’s reality to the surface.

I so don’t feel I could have bridged these realities inside of myself and my own healing/awakening process without ‘parts work’ as it is known. Without parts work, we just leave the part of us to pull themselves up by their own bootstraps, without them feeling a you there to be with them, to bridge and support them in the changes they wish to make, kind of like the physically present, but all too often emotionally absent parents we experienced in growing up.

When the bridging occurs between you and a part of you, the perception of what both the problem and the solutions are also shift and change and whole new worlds emerge that were not seen before.

This is the magical portal that our wounding is, offering us sacred entry into dimensions not seen or known yet. Spiritual fixes for depression or anxiety aren’t much better than the pharmaceutical fixes are as both are about the fear and avoidance of this portal.

Being ready to enter this portal is quite organic, and you simply know when you are there. The call and question about sufficient courage is outweighed by the growing inability to hold up the old way any longer.

Whatever needs to be surrendered in order to enter the portal is kind of like shrinking your life into a 2 suitcase limit on a one way overseas airplane flight. You only have 23 kilos per bag, so the question becomes about what’s coming or not. Really, you can only take yourself, and a few most necessary items. The life you’ve created and accumulated needs to be largely or completely let go of. Socially, this is probably the hardest as our underlying and unconscious social agreements are about each of us promising to remain proximal in both geography and within a certain consciousness bandwidth with one another. You could say that we co-sign one another’s agreements to stay in resonant around remaining small, that is until we default on the agreement.

Some around us understandably get pissed, and rightfully so. We were the best exemplars to the agreement, maybe even better than the others in the picture were. And now, you’re the one pulling the pin. You also have some apologies to make, but the crazy thing is, no one wants the apologies, they want you to return, but crazier still is that you’ve already morphed beyond the place where that could even be possible. There’s nothing left but to honour that with grief and sorrow and goodbyes.

‘You’re the one who changed’ my best friend once told me while out on a hiking trail trying to bridge a conversation about the growing differences between us. He was right. Our unspoken agreement had been about remaining true to a code of values, purpose and meaning. My emerging  values, purpose and meaning we’re leaving the parameters of our agreement. My old me simply couldn’t fit in the suitcase any longer and my departure date was fast approaching.

It wasn’t but a couple years later that I sat across from this friend at breakfast, with tears, and said goodbye to him, to our friendship, as where I was going was only going to leave both of us strained in a very unreal friendship, something neither of us were really capable of.

Life, real life, always brings up new enterings and leavings in this way. All of life could be summed up as a series of beginnings and endings in this way, and the most adapted to this reality, in their ability to feel grief and sorrow are truly the happiest campers. Joy comes in the morning and through the mourning.

What is it in life that is shifting and rumbling for you? What are you being asked to grieve and let go? How could you do that in a way that doesn’t leave you more wounded, withdrawn and reserved?

Could I help you make that transition? Could I help you embrace your bigger you? Could I help you find your soul family and passion purpose calling expression?

I moved into a new and brave world as a beginner, and have made some discoveries that may one day bear my name, but for now they are just here being offered to you, as these discoveries need more bold souls to test drive the living, loving and learning. Then it can be our discovery, and not just mine.

I would so welcome hearing from you, more about me and sessions at soulfullheart.org/sessions and you can email me at soulfullhearts@gmail.com. Sessions are for 90 minutes and cost $100 usd. You may also be drawn to one of the three other current SoulFullHeart facilitators, my wife, Jelelle Awen, Aurius Amara, Kasha Rokshana, whose info is also at the link above and who can be reached at the same email address above.

The pic above is from a recent group day with six of us here in Glastonbury/Avalon. We look shiny and lovely because we are most of the time, but also not without some serious mess in the playful bliss, both as couples and as a community.

Love,

Raphael 💚🌹🏄🏻‍♂️🙏🏻

Our next group call:

taking place on March 14th @ 5pm GMT (London, UK) with Raphael and Jelelle, which will focus on Sacred Sexuality. More info on that call can be found here: soulfullheart.org/grouptransmissions

Raphael Awen is co-creator, teacher, and facilitator of the SoulFullHeart Way Of Life.  Visit soulfullheart.org for more information about sessions, events, videos, etc. 

We are now offering our SoulFullHeart Portal on Mighty Networks, a private virtual gathering place for sharing exclusive content from us such as energy update writings and guided meditation videos, plus community forum threads with topics and groups that you can read, join, and contribute to as you want. You can join us at the SoulFullHeart Portal for a membership fee of $14.99 USD a month: soulfullheartportal.mn.co/

The Joys Of Not Knowing

By  Raphael Awen

Have you ever noticed that those who claim to not know how to pray offer the best prayers?

So often, it’s our experience and familiarity with something that hampers our arising and new direct interaction with that something.

How could we return to a state of not knowing in order to have a first time experience?

Even asking this question is using experience and knowing as an attempt to return to the innocence not knowing. Isn’t it maddening when the mind gets in the way, even when it’s wanting and willing to get out of the way, but just doesn’t know how?

Wait! I think we solved it, no?

You want to get out of your own way, but don’t know how. Now, you enter the womb of surrender.

You have a desire for something that you have no power or knowledge whatsoever on how you are going to achieve that something. All you have is what you don’t have.

I feel this place where my assets of past experience don’t seem to add up to anything of salvageable value towards entering a new unknown, except for the one asset of not knowing. If I don’t know, then I get to admit that, lead with that, toddle out my first steps into the new thing, laugh goodheartedly at myself along with the others I’m entertaining in the process.

I believe you also, not too far down inside, can feel the place where you don’t know what you are doing.

What if this could be admitted, owned, and cherished instead of a thing of shame and resistance and hiding? Your not knowing is the real gold you came here to share and explore.

You enter the God-zone where even God gets to not know through you.And it makes you really interesting, fun and sexy, if you ask me. Know it alls are boring and dry.

💚
🌹
🏄🏻‍♂️
🙏🏻
❤️

Raphael Awen is co-creator, teacher, and facilitator of the SoulFullHeart Way Of Life.  Visit soulfullheart.org for more information about sessions, events, videos, etc. 

We are now offering our SoulFullHeart Portal on Mighty Networks, a private virtual gathering place for sharing exclusive content from us such as energy update writings and guided meditation videos, plus community forum threads with topics and groups that you can read, join, and contribute to as you want. You can join us at the SoulFullHeart Portal for a membership fee of $14.99 USD a month: soulfullheartportal.mn.co/

My Long List Of Spiritual Attainments!

By Taliesin Awen

I’d like to share with you some of my more attained spiritual practices, not to brag or anything like that, but more to be a good example if it’s helpful.

Now, just to be clear and full disclosure and all, there are a few attainments that I haven’t quite realized, that I’m still working on, things like teleportation or levitation and the like. But that doesn’t take away really from what I have, through a lot of fucking hard work been able to achieve.

Let me see, where to begin?

I am able to watch the ‘watch’ thing on Facebook of late and scroll through endless videos of people doing stupid things, sometimes for like a full hour, quite effortlessly actually. I had no idea that table tennis got that advanced since I was into it. That Ozzy guy is a bit rough around the edges with his voice over reviews, but kudos to him for just being himself. The odd scantily clad beach babe inevitably comes up and I usually try to not linger too long, as she doesn’t feel that exciting really, taunting me with her non-offer, except maybe for a titillating moment. Between getting bored and a bit sore from laying around doing nothing really, I then check my Facebook posts for likes and accolades, before passing out.

Then I’m also quite well versed on a Tetris like iPad game, a teenage obsession that crept back into my life recently, nothing too complicated with too many levels and such, but yet in that vortex another half hour or more can pass into oblivion.

It’s also on my list to be able to pass through walls, which isn’t going too well, just yet, but I am really good at consistently banging into walls. If that doesn’t feel like too attained of a thing, just ask the angels, they have the through walls thing going on, but most of them can’t bump into a wall if their life depended on it. I’ve bumped into so much shit, I fear going bald for all the scars and war wounds that will be revealed. I’ll just be sure and wear one of my favorite spiritual teacher hats when the time for that comes.

What else? Right, I’m really good at early morning meditation, but just in my own developed style or dharma if you will. My mind can go in six directions at once, and remain busy as hell, talk about ‘multidimensionality’! I usually drink tea and sit up in bed while I do meditation though as that lotus position twisty thing is as uncomfortable as hell, believe me. I maintain some really good focus until it’s time to write a post or again, as I said, check on Facebook for likes or accolades, or to break my fast on some chocolate or cacao ceremony as some call it, a perfect excuse for chocolate being the first thing I eat on a day with nothing better to do.

Prior to my enlightenment, I was stuck in relentless daily regular consistent practices like yoga and exercise and such, but now, I’m settling naturally into being able to slough off those things easily for another day,… or month. Breaking these nasty addictions has been a major game changer.

Forgive me if any of this sounds like bragging, but it just felt important to not be afraid to toot my own horn. How else can anyone else truly learn if those of us who have gone before are not willing to say it like it is?

What else? Sometimes, I can say or write some pretty brilliant things that people seem to like and be touched by. Where it all comes from, I’m still trying to figure out, really. But what I am getting figured out is that the one thing that really pisses a part of me off is pretending to be something I’m not, so that’s another one I’m still working on, after way the hell too much time spent posturing and pretending, which I’m discovering more and more to be maybe thee root of all stress in my life. That pattern comes up now big time in trying digest where and why a treasured romance recently suddenly came apart at the seams.

I want to get back to play, to really learning, or unlearning maybe more like, how to really be in the abandonment of play. The young kids I see more and more just don’t give a fuck somehow in this really delicious way, and God, I’d love to get more like that. So don’t think for a moment that I’ve got absolutely everything figured out just because I’m admittedly ahead of you in these ways I’m describing.

One more thing while I’m on a roll, I’ve gotten quite expert at reading any room and showing up with what’s expected and hiding away things that I guess wouldn’t score me too many points, or worse, get me kicked out of the game. All that has done me a lot of good, or so I thought, even made me plenty of money over the years, even if it hollowed out most of the deeper meaning in many of my relationships. When I say meaning, I think I’m speaking to the freedom of finding the self permission to just fucking being real in an ever deepening way. If it ain’t real; warts, language, offense and the like, what the hell good is it? Maybe you and I both could use some offense!?

I’m pretty good too at overeating. Why eat just the right amount of all the right things when you can bloat yourself out for the rest of the day and night? Nothing you can’t fix with some dessert thrown on top for good measure to assuage the disconnect of eating about twice what I actually needed.

Anyway, I’m running out of more examples just now, but it felt important to at least give you the high points and set the record straight, for my self worth, to not be afraid to say it straight. And it shouldn’t take you as long as it’s taken me, with me blazing the way for you, a true exemplary wayshower.

Now that I said all that, I feel ready to get going on the next challenges. After all, as they say, if you’re not going forward, you’re going backward. So here’s to fully ass-ending or ascending or whatever that’s called that everyone’s gotten their knickers in a knot over. I’m kind of sure we’ll all end up at the finish line sooner or later, on our asses maybe, but there nonetheless, so not to worry if you’re a bit slower than me. I look forward to being in that moment with each of you and debriefing this whole thing, what we got figured out, and what we didn’t.

You may even be having a better time at all this than I did. I’d be happy to pass the baton and you get to be the shining example, and I get to be a follower for a change.

We’re all different and all God’s children, don’t forget. Hopefully I’m not too far ahead and you’ll still be able to relate. I don’t want to be so heavenly minded as to not be of any earthly good. And of course, I need to make a living at this while I’m at it, so if you care to send money, I’ll be sure to spend that on ice cream and the like.

Yours in sacred service,

Raphael

As you may have seen in a recent post, I’m in process of changing my first name to Taliesin. This writing felt like Raphael, who I’m now relating to as a part of me, and him wanting to part with a layer, a role, that he doesn’t want to take with him as he retires from the lead and heads out for some very well deserved and needed time away in Golden Earth. Thank you to each of you witnessing and feeling with me. 💚🙏🏻🏄🏻‍♂️🌹 Taliesin

Raphael Awen is co-creator, teacher, and facilitator of the SoulFullHeart Way Of Life.  Visit soulfullheart.org for more information about sessions, events, videos, etc. 

We are now offering our SoulFullHeart Portal on Mighty Networks, a private virtual gathering place for sharing exclusive content from us such as energy update writings and guided meditation videos, plus community forum threads with topics and groups that you can read, join, and contribute to as you want. You can join us at the SoulFullHeart Portal for a membership fee of $14.99 USD a month: soulfullheartportal.mn.co/

Raphael Has Changed His First Name To Taliesin

By Taliesin Awen

Dearly Beloveds known and to be known,

Well, I did it! I’ve changed my name in the annals of my own heart and with those closest to me and it’s time to announce that here after sharing deeply about the intention here in a recent FB post recently, hoping that it doesn’t come up for you as too weird or abrupt.

Allow me to say a couple more important things first…

I decided NOT to start a whole new FB page, contrary to what I said I was going to do – thank god! That was said in a moment of de-spiration from within the deeply polarized vortex I went through last week. I’m really relieved to remain here and bring the new energies of what’s unfolding for me to share with those here.

I’d really love to be on your ‘see first’ list here on FB because I feel deeply called to be joined with those who’d like to share a resonance flow together and deepening ongoing journey together.

If you don’t feel drawn to have that together and by chance find it hard to relate to my energy, it’s okay if you need to unfriend too or just choose a safer distance. I trust that life is taking both of us where we need to go. I just want to increase the intention of being together at the orbit that feels right.

Thank you for who you are and what you add to my life.

Okay, that was the really important stuff, but there’s still more stuff to share.

In case you’re wondering, my new name is pronounced Tal-ee-ES-in. It may be a bit of a stumble for a while, but that’s all part of it. If you call me Raphael out of habit, that’s quite okay too. I’m relating to Raphael as a very beloved part of me, giving him the opportunity to receive my heart, instead of the long journey of being my heart that he now gets to rest from if that makes sense.

I feel like I recently went through the biggest death and rebirth canal of my life recently, I’m sure there’s more to go, but I do feel to be finding some handrails and seeing some light of a bright new and glorious day in the moment. This has been about going through my biggest heartbreak this life in completing my romance with Jelelle and worse, even fearing not having her and close feminine beloveds in my life in some way, shape or form that I’ve known and come to treasure so deeply. I’m on the higher side at the moment of what has felt like quite a manic ride of the lowest lows and the highest highs. I’d check myself in if I didn’t have some sense of deep trust and surrender to the process. My heart has been and is being broken open in a new way to receive love and to serve love, and dang, it feels so fucking alive!

I feel called to gather a round table of men to share in this aliveness of heart and soul. The beloved women in our lives and the feminine within will not be unwelcome in any way, quite the opposite actually. We just need private space to process and feel and heal together with what’s real now. I see this round table as like a gathering of Arthur’s knights where we are each arising kings and equals, each with unique gifts and contributions, where each man participates with his sovereignty intact and present, rather than something you give up at the door and have hung before you like a carrot that you can then earn back in exchange for your conformity and good behaviour. I know that last sentence is saying a lot, but I believe it has much to do with why men in general (as compared to women) are more distant to deep inner work, emotionally and spiritually – because they don’t want to be emasculated or dominated as they surrender vulnerably to love and let go to find their true power.

I’m deeply sharing this calling with my beloved closest friend and deepest heart and soul brother, Gabriel Heartman who I have known and lived in deep community with for nearly a decade, lived in 3 countries with, but now am actually living together with, sharing dreams, desires, heartbreaks and heart openings. The inspiration is rising and there are some sweet announcements to make soon, just after we share them and feel them and shape them with our closest beloveds first. Please stay tuned – hence the request above to be on your ‘see first’ list.

Okay, I guess I can’t tell you everything in one post, but let me say for now that you will be seeing more of Gabriel and I, expanding out with more and more men, live streams, Conversations With Men videos, ‘courses’ are definitely in the picture, too.

We’re just looking for ways to channel and share in a calling, to nourish and be nourished. Much of this content we are feeling to make by donation or to charge for as opposed to creating free content, as that doesn’t seem to really work for any of us. We definitely need the money and those we share with need to put some skin in the game for the game to be engaging and come alive.

We are just about to share, (and ask a donation for) a video we recorded as a guided meditation to meet your grief directed to men. This feels like the biggest portal for men to enter their sacred calling. It also deeply thrusts them into communication with the parts of themselves they haven’t yet bridged contact with. And it also thrusts them into the world of their own soul, their own Metasoul brothers and sisters in the most grounded and relational way. So please stay tuned for that.

Both Gabriel and I offer one on one sessions for men and if you’d like to explore that, we’d love to hear from you, serve you and receive your financial support in exchange for. The cost is $100 USD for a 90 minute session together and they are transformational beyond words!

We’re both feeling to put out our tip jars as we go on our stuff. Again, we need and want the exchange of your energy, love in the form of money. You can share some here: paypal.me/awentaliesin. I would be so grateful and tickled to receive your love in this form and allow it to be part of a deepening sacred bond together.

Thank you also to each of you who share my stuff with your FB circle of friends! Precious introductions.

Let’s do this and let’s do it together,

Taliesin (and Raphael)

Tal-ee-ES-in 🙂

Tons of love!

Our sessions Page: https://www.soulfullheart.org/sessions

Raphael Awen is co-creator, teacher, and facilitator of the SoulFullHeart Way Of Life.  Visit soulfullheart.org for more information about sessions, events, videos, etc. 

We are now offering our SoulFullHeart Portal on Mighty Networks, a private virtual gathering place for sharing exclusive content from us such as energy update writings and guided meditation videos, plus community forum threads with topics and groups that you can read, join, and contribute to as you want. You can join us at the SoulFullHeart Portal for a membership fee of $14.99 USD a month: soulfullheartportal.mn.co/

King Arthur’s Call To Men

By Raphael Awen

I believe this is a moment like no other, a moment of opportunity, a moment to choose deep and profound change, a moment to embrace all of you, from your highest leading ‘I Am’ Self all the way down to your ‘lowest’ edge where parts of you live in doubt and insecurity. 

Nothing is actually lower or higher. You will never become any more sacred than you already are! If that is true, then you and I finally have the freedom, to look deeply into the mirrors of our lives, our circumstances, our relationships and take the deepest inventory of what’s also true there, as none of it can take away or add to the fact that ‘I already AM, all that I ever might become’. 

I am very deeply interested in all that I might become. I am also very deeply interested in all that I already am. While this has always felt true for me on some level on my journey, I can tell you that it has felt like my biggest challenge as well. It has waxed and waned. At times, even very recently, I’ve seen my bigness stare me in the face and it has scared parts of me to the core. Numerous hideouts and comfortable ceilings have again been discovered and negotiated with, and let go of, only to be faced with another layer of vulnerability, insecurity and desire. I suspect that this is the whole deal of being here. It gets to move for me from more private to more service-based as I transparently live this out loud. 

I’m no longer of the illusion that these kinds of challenges where I must face a new place in me feeling contracted or small will somehow become ‘healed’ or a thing of the past. If I AM is truly infinite greatness, then any and all achievements or attainments, no matter how great, how relieving, how homecoming, how much of an entrance into my personal promised land – they still remain a humble kindergarten. I’m starting to get used to that! – another celebrated ‘attainment’ in and of itself, where any and all movements either forward or backward are part of the magical and infinite I AM that I AM. 

The other big thing all of this offers me is that the only one I can ever be a saviour for, is me and me alone. I can’t offer you anything you don’t already possess. With this clarity, I can however, hold space to offer you, YOU. 

When Moses, standing in his small self perceived stature before a burning bush manifestation of God, hearing the voice of God calling him and sending him, asked God a very understandable question: “Who do I say sent me?” and God answers, “Tell them thee I AM that I Am has sent you.”

I’m here today standing before mankind, my kind, saying “The I Am that I Am, has sent me to you.” I’m here, in your hearing, speaking to your I AM that I AM, before the burning bush of your desires, your heart aches, your heart passions, inviting you into something tangible, alive and real, inside and outside. 

I’ve crossed a threshold into my own promised land and feel it is more important than ever to invite other men who are ready to enter theirs with me. I can’t do what I’m called to do, or be what I’m called to BE, in a box or on my own. I get to walk out my more in the resonance field that’s generated with other men doing the same.

I’ve done that primarily with Gabriel Heartman for many years in a time where most efforts to expand numbers were met with more inner expansion than any kind of outward expansion. Time and process was needed mostly in private. I feel and see that changing now. Something is shifting in men and in the core of my I Am, informing all of me with a new resolve, as well as a sacred and ongoing completion of my own very real push-pull relationship with my own bigness. I want that more than I want life. This is life to me.

What is life to you? What do you most deeply want? Are you prepared to reach out for a lifeline when one is thrown to you, or will you continue praying for a lifeline instead? There’s a time to ask and a time to act.

I may be sounding fearfully close to a promo salesperson now, and to be sure, I AM trying to sell you on something. I AM called to sell you on something. I AM called to sell you on you. It’s strange though, because no words that I might write or speak could ever actually achieve this. It’s only and ever achievable by living it out inside of myself, and you picking up on that and choosing the same for yourself. 

Our mutual benefit is then easy and natural, whether we go any further in any kind of together way. 

If however, the particular signature frequency of my deal feels like it may be or wants to be a part of your signature deal, then I deeply invite you to check out who I AM and what I offer. 

This video is me here in the Abbey ruins in Glastonbury, offering a connection with one of my beautiful Metasoul brothers; King Arthur. How fitting as he knows how to assemble and lead a round table of men! 

Gabriel Heartman and myself both serve men in one on one sessions helping men embrace all of themselves in ongoing process via a specific path. Here’s a link to more about sessions: https://www.soulfullheart.org/sessions

Sessions may well be a bit too close, too soon, for where you are, if you’ve just discovered us. If so, I invite you to consider following us at whatever distance feels comfortable for you, while serving your heartache and opportunity. 

A great way to do that is to join our SoulFullHeart Portal for $15 usd per month, a private on-line community where you get to share with like minded men and women, as well as a men’s only portion of the Portal, and receive exclusive content, writings, videos and transmissions. Here’s an invite to our Portal.

If you’ve read this through this far, then I know you are feeling the truth of the first words I spoke today – that this is a moment of opportunity like no other. Other moments will be sure to come, if that’s what your I AM needs to orchestrate for you, but what if this moment right now is your moment, or at least one of them? What if what I’m offering you is offered to you for you to make a deeper personal connection, to see where it takes you, to see if what you are feeling right now, continues to self validate as a truly profound going on place? If so, I’d love to hear from you. Gabriel would love to hear from you. 

I can tell you from the depths of my heart and experience that I Am wanting, willing and ready to serve you, to show up for you as you show up for you. 

If you are a woman who’s read this all the way through, bless you! And allow yourself to take in all these words directed at men, and feel them for your own inner masculine parts of you. Also, let your sacred yearning and desire for men and the missing masculine to rise up and claim the inhabitation of their long awaited I AM selves, be a gift of alchemy transmitted to all the men feeling this, whether by my words today, or by the same download that’s being broadcast into the collective from many different sources right NOW. 

If you know of other men who you feel are ready for such a time as this, please share this post with them. 

May we each arise to this occasion to find ultimately that there was ever only one of us and one occasion all the while, one truly worth showing up for. 

Much Love,

Raphael Awen

Raphael Awen is co-creator, teacher, and facilitator of the SoulFullHeart Way Of Life.  Visit soulfullheart.org for more information about sessions, events, videos, etc. 

We are now offering our SoulFullHeart Portal on Mighty Networks, a private virtual gathering place for sharing exclusive content from us such as energy update writings and guided meditation videos, plus community forum threads with topics and groups that you can read, join, and contribute to as you want. You can join us at the SoulFullHeart Portal for a membership fee of $14.99 USD a month: soulfullheartportal.mn.co/