Relationships Provide The Ground For Our Learning And Growth

By  Raphael Awen

Every relationship we have and their unfolding circumstances, whether with another person, or a thing or an institution is the ground of our learning, our growth.

Relationships are our spiritual teacher, that we can either tune into to our gain or ignore to our loss.

We were born into duality, the world of good and bad, desirable and undesirable, and that is what creates experience.

Experience calls for preference and choice. Experience is also the ground of our joy and our irritation. Without experience, we wouldn’t grow, there would be no need for growth as we would be in a world of full attainment, quite possibly bored as hell at the same time.

Would pure joy be pure joy if it was the only mode you are capable of, if there was nothing to compare it to, to help define it as desirable?

The human experience is one of polarities and dualities. Many seek to avoid this by pursuing a ‘nondual awakening’ as a kind of spiritual attainment and making that a medication to help them avoid the feeling and learning that duality wants to teach them. Yes, duality was born out of non-duality, and non-duality may well be our our upstream reality and higher essence, but we chose to be here in duality, so the invitation is to be here now, where we are, receive the learnings and expansions that we could receive no other way.

We find lots of duality right inside of ourselves, one part of us posturing to be seen a certain way and dead scared of operating out of that familiar mode and another part of us desperately wanting to just drop-the-fucking-role already!

Can we embrace this duality within, and become an ambassador to each part of us and get to know them and their realities without making one right and the other wrong?

It’s about reconciling our dualities in this way, not eliminating them.

All stress can be traced to the garden variety of lying that we all participate in, needing to seen a certain way; having it together in a way that doesn’t match the actual reality within. This stress becomes more like a psychosis the longer it is ignored and not faced.

Facing it however, with choice, with love, with curiosity and an opening heart brings us into realms of experience we never thought possible. It changes everything.

Raphael Awen

(The pic above is from nearby our camp this summer in Geres, Portugal)

Raphael Awen is co-creator, teacher, and facilitator of the SoulFullHeart Way Of Life.  Visit soulfullheart.org for more information about sessions, events, videos, etc. 

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