Raphael Awen

Integration Authorization

Published on November 22, 2017November 22, 2017 by Raphael Awen2 Comments

293

By Raphael Awen

Why do men tend to shy away from spirituality and emotionality in comparison to women?

Pardon the generalization as it’s of course not true in all cases, but it is true enough for it to be a recognizable pattern.

I’m feeling a desire to rile men, to stir their deeper heart passion for what they really want. I feel a reaching out for a deeper inhabitation of my own sacred masculinity. I feel a deeper wanting of men to come out and really play! I too, have a desire inside of me somewhere to conform, I just want to conform to a new standard of being as the old ones are dying fast.

What is it about the needs in a man vs a woman that naturally dispose them towards these differences?

Are men afraid of inadequacy in the arena of heart and soul?

Are men afraid to feel? And if so, why?

Can a man sustain a hardon and a hearton at the same time?

Are men afraid that there won’t be enough of a ground for a worthy fight, for a contention, for a passionate claiming and pursuit of what they want in the arena of heart and soul?

Is spirituality and emotionality too wimpy feeling for them? Why and how so?

Why is vulnerability (the ability to be hurt) mistaken for weakness in men?

Jelelle Awen and I were talking yesterday about the daily flow of new names of men in the news lately being charged with sexual harassment, and how it is almost unheard of to hear about women being aggressors in this way? Add to that the rarity of a woman rapist? Add to that men’s draw to porn over women’s? (I wrote a piece about that here: https://soulfullheartblog.com/…/why-men-are-drawn-to-porns…/ ) It’s evident the archetypal ground underneath us is rumbling big time. The mighty are falling and we are feeling it.

We are in the middle of a huge collective birth canal that is tied to our personal birth canals. Thank god for the decks being cleared of the pretense, making room for something so much more real, but where is it all leading?

I don’t know the surface answers to these questions, as I so prefer the quest of the questions, but I do smell fear of some kind. Why else would men energize their fearlessness in other (ie. money and career, and in my opinion, lesser) arenas, while avoiding the spiritual and the emotional?

Isn’t this simply a pretense of power; a compensation to keep a deeper fear off their radar?

How could the more male passion to achieve, or to provide, be an integrous blend of deep heart and soul that doesn’t need a safe compartmentalization in order to express powerfully?

Parts of us have understandably adapted by grabbing at the collective ideas of womanhood and manhood as a map to know where the landmines are, to avoid rejection and gain love, often in the form of just some sniff of love of a cultural pat on the back.

Where this whole dialogue becomes more than a dialogue, and finds a deep traction of movement is when you as a man get to know and love the part of you stumbling around in this other hand-me-down man’s arena, that isn’t really yours. A part of you is nearing exhaustion, or may even be totally checked out, just putting in time, afraid of the more overt forms of suicide.

Will you recognize this? Will you cast off other men’s comparison games that aren’t you at all? Will you fight for who and what you really are?

‘You’ may well feel like you don’t know who you are; as a man, or as a human. But this is clearly the feelings of a part of you, not YOU, that has become disillusioned.

Can you begin to make this critical differentiation inside of yourself? I ask you this because I feel it to be the ongoingly mission critical point of my entire journey here. I needed to adapt parts of myself, to fuse them to a ‘lower’ reality, in order to gain what I came here to gain. Now though, it is time to reconcile all these parts of myself into the new emerging ‘higher’ timeline or reconciliation. We were dis-membered in order to be re-membered, and we chose it. We know this on a soul level, as a soul being and we know this on a personal level, as a human being. Both need space and time to be felt. Hence, here we are, still in the domain of space and time.

YOU as a Higher Self will need to enter this place of differentiation, and then negotiation and ambassadorship between these parts of you, then choice, intention and declaration if there is to be any growth or change. Were you actually looking for something easier? I don’t think so, or you wouldn’t have been going about it the harder way that you have up till now?

None of this can effectively be bullied into place by a punishing part of you, or it’s just another compensation approach to covering over a deeper fear. YOU can instead get to know the checked out part of you, get to know the bully inside that wants to order and mandate it all, get to know the part of you who simply doesn’t give a fuck; and then from there, lead a true declaration of heart that stems from this arising you-to-you Ambassadorship.

Choice, desire and intention are huge here, but these cannot be faked into place from a few pages from a book plucked from the self-help section. Not anymore. We’re collectively coming to the end of something and awaiting the arising of the beginning of something that will take its place. That something is already in you and available to you now. You just won’t find it on the street corner yet.

There has never been a time like this time for you as a man to go for what you really want. There are ripe and key choice points staring you down right now that are directly tied to your choosing of this more. You have the guidance. You have the courage. But it goes nowhere until you make the choice.

Courage and guidance are gifts to you from the universe. Choice is the gift you exchange with the universe in return as the sovereign that you are. The universe can not and will not make these changes for you. Expecting the universe to make changes that only you can make is only a way to obscure your response-ability, and leaves you in a child’s relationship to authority. You are the author now.

What action is the universe calling you to? That’s your full manhood right there calling to you for embrace. I promise you that this ride truly has everything you are looking for, so much so, that choosing this ride will be the most adventurous choice you’ve ever made.

SoulFullHeart is one process that unfolds this journey for men. I am one who serves that process. If you are one who wants to trade in this currency and in this arena, I’d love to serve you.

Raphael Awen is co-creator, teacher, and facilitator of the SoulFullHeart Way Of Life. Visit www.soulfullheartwayoflife.com for more information about Weekly Sessions, Live Streams, Videos, and Community.

Return LOVE in money form: https://www.paypal.me/supportsoulfullheart or visit our Patreon page to become a monthly supporter: https://www.patreon.com/soulfullheart.

Ambidextrous Ambassadorship

Published on November 21, 2017November 21, 2017 by Raphael Awen3 Comments

288

By Raphael Awen

The veil has been necessary for your inhabitation in a phase of a limited 3D consciousness.

That veil is rapidly thinning, and you are even much more multidimensionally aware and functioning than your conscious mind has caught up with.

The tension you feel between what your conscious mind knows and has ‘proof’ for, and what your subconscious mind knows to be true is a tension that wants to be felt and loved by you. The conscious and the subconscious are not actually in opposition to each other, but it can be perceived that way, from the 3D mind, due to a phase of necessary compartmentalization that was needed in order to fully ground in this third dimension.

You as an essence were actually vibrating at way too high a frequency to be able to exist at this lower density, so you needed to forget. Now, however, you are needing to remember, as you move from a phase of descension into a phase of ascension. Both are equally sacred and to be loved and honored.

Your conscious mind and personality is largely an adapted part of you form fitted to this reality at hand. It was created by your Higher Self (Your larger you) as a vehicle to inhabit this phase of your journey in this specific climate and terrain. This 3D part of you and the related parts of you need to be felt and related with. The reactions that ‘you’ feel about this time of ascension are almost all coming from these 3D form fitted parts of you.

It would help greatly in your process of awakening, reintegrating consciousness to say instead of ‘I feel…’, to say ‘a part of me feels…’. When you do this, you are speaking from a higher dimensional frequency of your being, moving towards your Higher Self. You are also differentiating between the part of you who feels this tension of Ascension, giving it recognition and love.

There are other ‘things’ you can do to facilitate your awakening process, and I will share them with you now.

(I tune in Metatron’s voice here as I’ve been asking for more on this)

The universe functions on intention and permission. And these 2 both are a frequency waveform that are articulated by the tongue. As a tiny rudder guides a great ship, so the tongue guides your life. Your voice needs to declare to the universe and to these parts of you what your wishes and desires are.

You are essentially seeking to integrate, or we could say ‘de-compartmentalize’ a tension and polarity inside of your being. This is achieved by becoming an Ambassador to both realities, to both parties, to let each party get to know and feel the reality of the other party inside of you. Your 5D self wants to really get to know and feel your 3D self, and vice versa. They no longer want to live separate existences in separate compartments. As this Ambassadorship unfolds, your life structures and relationships will naturally and quite effortlessly shift to reflect these internal changes in your reality.

As you get to ‘know and love’, embodying this ambassadorship more and more to the fuller regions of your being, you will know when it is time to speak new declarations and treaties that are founded on this knowledge and love.

Speaking words aloud like;

‘I am a multidimensional being’

‘I am infinite love’

‘I am the bright, bright, bright, light of God’…

are all waveform frequency portals to this deepening reality. You can feel this as you speak these words. In the beginning was the word (logos). This is the beginning of your unfolding logos. The logos is your new multidimensional reality of the non-compartmentalized variety. The tension is only meant to be a part of the birth canal from one to another rather than a static state. Your 3D mind and your 5D mind want to be fluid and functional. Learning to walk in 3D was considered quite something, and it was! Learning to walk in 5D is cooler still, but what really tops them all is being able to fluidly walk between them both. Let’s call it ‘ambidextrous’ – the ability to walk between the worlds.

We all have some more work to do to even know what that looks and feels like. It’s like sex. Regardless of how many books and movies depict it, one’s own experience of sex is so infinite in its possibilities, that what one is experiencing can be so very different than what even a partner is experiencing. So don’t expect a government bureau to declare you ‘multidimensional’, and issue you a license or threaten to take it away if you don’t observe the rules. There are no rules, largely, other than the rules of Karma, which boil down simply to Love.

All is returning to love.

This is your return to full multidimensionality, where each step and phase is sacred.

Audio of this blog can be found here: https://youtu.be/L2L8-uK3X-g

Return LOVE in money form: https://www.paypal.me/supportsoulfullheart or visit our Patreon page to become a monthly supporter: https://www.patreon.com/soulfullheart.

Unlimited

Published on November 20, 2017 by Raphael Awen2 Comments

282

By Raphael Awen

It’s only the conscious self, the you who you think you are that feels lacking, or not unique, or boring…

When in a new emerging awareness of another reality, this picture looks and feels very different and totally new.

That you are able to have a flat lined existence, perceiving yourself as limited, or boring or not unique is actually a crazy piece of magic all in itself, that speaks to this freedom from the literal mind lockdown I’d like to invite you to feel into with me.

It seems growingly apparent now that a locked down or limited piece of consciousness was needed to accompany your 3D journey to make it real in the 3D dimension (think computer operating system)

This makes sense when you feel how what you actually are is a being without limits, unique beyond measure, so full of engagement and excitement, that you were/are able to dial up a limited experience.

In other words, your limited experience is proof of your unlimited abilities.

The parts of you who feel they way they do from inside of your present conscious perception of your life generate powerful energetic emissions that create your very made up reality. These parts of you can only shift their reality as they are related with by you, as an arising authentic self. Nothing comes to us except by way of relationship. This is true for all of our wounding and all of our healing. It all occurs in relationship.

A new you-to-you relationship awaits you as you enter a willingness to feel all there is to feel, the feelings coming from each and every self-loving and magical part of you.

Talk about entering the unknown and uncharted…, it wouldn’t be a journey if your conscious self knew the outcome, or the prize, or the prices, would it?

Return LOVE in money form: https://www.paypal.me/supportsoulfullheart or visit our Patreon page to become a monthly supporter: https://www.patreon.com/soulfullheart.

Leaving Home

Published on November 17, 2017 by Raphael Awen2 Comments

275

By Raphael Awen

Home is a frequency.

Part of the ache for home is a residual homing instinct drawing you back to your true home.

You left a home, that like any other home, you, we, all had normalized and taken for granted.

We knew we were more wanting and waiting to happen. We knew our parents were silently counting on us to reach out for that more, just as they had reached for their more, the baton being passed to us.

We entered less while remaining in possession of all. The less we entered was only in regard to the awareness of our grandeur, rather than any lessening of our true essence. We needed a place that felt not-grand from which to be re-membered with our grandeur, and in that process to be transmuted yet further into new beyonds.

There wasn’t sufficient duality to provide this necessary sense of loss that we needed to experience movement in our previous domain of home.

The depression or anxiety or rage that you feel, or any other so called ‘negative’ emotion are all emissions of this home frequency drawing you back home. We’ve resisted these emotions and drugged them down in so many ways because at core, we are afraid of losing these anchors to the 3rd dimension.

We long for our ultimate home, but one of the deepest expressions of that missing and longing is to attach to a present home. We fear letting something so catastrophic as the feeling of losing home happen to us again. We are still digesting the choice we made to strike out on our own journey to leave home, venturing into more godhood. We were not willing to skip over any feeling as feeling we knew was mission critical.

If you live in the forest, you build your home out of wood. We found ourselves in the land of loss, and so we have, quite magically actually, built our home out of the abundant commodities of anxiety and depression, and fear. It’s admittedly not the greatest, but it is home, and it is familiar, and from here, we are invited to feel.

Who would have guessed though that our enduring essence would call to us from any home we crafted in any place in this domain of lesser?

We knew our essence was immutable. We knew our sovereignty was indisputable. We knew our infallibility was a given, so we chose to fall into forgetting all that. Our fall from grace was and is a fall into the grace we were, but needed to escape to have the experience of leaving and returning.

We left in order to enter.

Without this journey, we couldn’t know the deeper depths of what we were and are.

This is the true construct of the time zone; a place to have expanded out feelings of awareness, this journey, measured out in days.

Our consciousness is programmed securely to come back to full rememberance. Not only that (magical as that is), we are also programmed to return home to becoming even so much more, that we of course can’t see or know until we can.

In our previous bliss, we normalized that experience. It became old. The looks on our faces became predictable and all too familiar. This normalizing tendency is what we might call a downside of individuated consciousness. As individuated consciousness, our assignment is to experience experience itself and report back to essence on what that feels like. We’re creating a central bank (of the non corrupt variety) of these feeling deposits as a cosmic fuel tank to take us deeper into exploring the essence of what we actually are.

So now you see how your everyday familiar feelings of your life as you currently know it, having normalized the magical into the mundane, is a clarion call to awaken to deeper feelings of who and what you really are. This is tuning in your home frequency.

You feeling more expansive feelings of remembering who you really are is the mission. That mission is the great quantum gift to all. Feel that today, as deeply as you can, and then put your feet up! You’ve just changed the whole world. You’ll be ready for more tomorrow.

We are taking our time, literally using up all the time in the world, to decide if and when we are ready… ready to tune in more of this homing frequency of home, returning to not only the home we once knew, but one so much more.

Return LOVE in money form: https://www.paypal.me/supportsoulfullheart or visit our Patreon page to become a monthly supporter: https://www.patreon.com/soulfullheart.

Turbocharged Awakening

Published on November 15, 2017 by Raphael Awen2 Comments

266

By Raphael Awen

If you pause for any moment you wish to and feel how you both will have and actually do have everything you could ever desire, this changes the you in the moment who feels the absence and longing of these things.

This is a big one!

I was offering someone in session who came to me for help with a battle with a longstanding and intense sexual addiction. I was intuitively given a fore-feeling of his total and complete liberation from this challenge, where I felt the funny feeling of him in his life without this orientation to life and I shared that with him. There was a feeling of him now very free, but faced with definite new challenges of growth in the absence of this defining life long addiction. I offered him the magic of an ongoing path to more self discovery process to live his way into that relief and the growth….he had deep tears, and then, I never heard from him again!

My sense is that, for many, actually having the conscious thing that you long for is something that other unconscious parts of us can actually resist having intensely. There’s more work to do to be able, or to be ready, to let in a next phase of experience that our Higher Self has on our agenda.

The longing and desire is very important though as it is a signpost pointing to and energizing our future, and to the work before us.

I’m currently longing for more 5D experience. I’m feeling very ready on one level for more telepathy, teleportation, telekinesis, those are all very cool for sure. I think what I’d like even more though at the moment is a deepening experience of anything that I set out to do as work being deeper and deeper play, with more reverence and wonder. Being in child’s mind state asking who?, what?, when?, why? where? and how? all looks really good to me too, as I explore new dimensions of my galactic selves, my star-being reality, new pleasures in service to others, as I get to know and connect with beings in the Now who are from my metasoul family.

Whatever you and I might be longing for, especially if it’s to be free of something, like a chronic soul pain or way of relating to life that is limiting daily life and experience, if you can dial in this vision of yourself completely free of that reality, as a bi-location exercise, you will greatly aid the movement in that direction you desire.

This takes into account that you already have it and that you don’t. Both realities are true, and thank god, because this is where all adventure and movement comes from. You didn’t come here to be stuck in the stasis of addiction, or despair, but neither did you come here to be stuck in a love and light bliss bubble either!

You came here for experience that you couldn’t have were it not for the magic of polarity. Your suffering is actually a gas tank, and the propulsion engine that draws from this gas tank is your choice and intention. Without choice and intention, we could say, you are dead in the water, but that wouldn’t be accurate as there really isn’t any death, there is only times of incubating and composting new intention and choice points. It’s always movement, even if it seems infinitesimally slow. Even the man I mentioned above not hearing back from is receiving what he needs perfectly according to his own Higher Self’s path.

The movements we seek then and the work we have to embrace is about finding and feeling the inner resistances we also have inside of us towards the consciously desired thing. These resistances are always held by parts of ourselves, in my truth, leaving the responsibility and empowerment always with us. Yes, we may have been deeply victimized in life experience, even as a dependent child, with that victimized child still being alive and well within us, but at the same time, an arising adult self is being called to show up to take full responsibility. Talk about an anti-gravity device! You are a victim and you are NOT!

The parts of ourselves that need to be felt and reached and given a digestion of the traumas they hold are very reachable, with intention, with a guide, in your life as you currently know it, with a process like the one we offer through SoulFullHeart….

SoulFullHeart is a turbocharged simulation of the process of life itself, where intention and process can unfold on a much quicker timeline for people of their Higher Selves agenda for those souls for whom it feels like a fit for.

If my offer just now feels like a choice point for you to explore, I’m ready for a next step if you are. We offer a free intro session into an ongoing weekly process that requires an intention of time and money, that templates a new way of relating to life as well as a practice ground to live that out relationally. Please read more about this at http://www.soulfullheartwayoflife.com/sessions and when you’re ready, I look forward to hearing from you.

Return LOVE in money form: https://www.paypal.me/supportsoulfullheart or visit our Patreon page to become a monthly supporter: https://www.patreon.com/soulfullheart.

Letting Go In Order To Have

Published on November 11, 2017November 13, 2017 by Raphael Awen3 Comments

259

By Raphael Awen

Try as I would, quite a number of years ago now, I would often fall asleep watching movies with my ex-wife and 2 daughters. I wanted to be there for sure, but other parts of me were deep into other life content. ‘I’ had the cover of just being sleepy on a tummy full of pizza after a long day’s work, and would do the all too familiar drift off on the couch, until I heard the ‘Just go to bed, Dad’.

We are collectively at a similar place in the narrative right now, except the movie is being played out in real life, kinda like live streaming. Many are asleep and just can’t wake up, and I would say, that even though that is disappointing and even tragic to those of us who are awake, it feels like them remaining asleep is what is meant to be, by their higher selves.

Not all of consciousness needs to be awake at the same time for the awakening to occur. It feels more like some of us need to be asleep for the awakening to occur as those that are asleep anchor another polarity aspect of the collective movement. We are all in this together at a higher level achieving the same thing, for the one being that we are.

It’s distressing to us when we feel a distance creep in though between us and our loved ones when we can’t enjoy or be moved by the same movie, now finding ourselves even taking roles within a larger real life story that are ‘against’ one another.

In my awakening and the underlying anxiety of awakening first and losing connection with family and friends, I found myself trying to embody being the best example for them, which worked for a time, giving part of me a sense of mission and purpose playing the ‘being the largest soul in the room’ game. Eventually though, I reached the edges of the no-go boundaries as I pressed against the Christian fundamentals we were all apart of. Here, my friends and family were clearly faced with a loyalty to Jesus and God, vs a loyalty to me. It’s quite a pretzel for a family to go through and it was a slow moving unexpected cataclysm for all of us in many ways. They advocated for a ‘let’s just agree on what we do agree on’ kind of stance, while also being unwilling to talk openly about how they felt I was deceived. I eventually dropped my end of the rope though in this conflict realizing a couple things. One was that I could no longer be in relationships with people who held both love for me along with hidden disdain for me, as I was finding and feeling the parts of myself that had disdain for each other, and coming to deep personal self love reconciliation. The other realization was about how my tugging on friends and family when they were resistant to me was another unhealthy recapitulation of ‘making do with crumbs’ when life was offering me a full meal.

Choosing yourself at these junctures of life changes the timelines and trajectories of your life big time. It also undermines some of our deepest existential securities, or insecurities rather, about family ‘always being there for you’. I personally have sons in laws and grandchildren I haven’t met because of the playouts of these choices. The pain of that has been processed and felt at the time of the choice and it now actually lives in me as my highest love gift to myself, them and the universe to be living a separated timeline and having no contact while we are living planets apart in values and belief systems. To be shrinking in a patched together pretense of harmony, with underlying and unprocessed disdain would only be something that could work for me if it was an outer reflection of an inner reality. If you change the inside, you will naturally come to mirror that change outside in life as all of this has a one to one correlation, inviting you to choice points to be able to go on to your next growth points.

This is the real life movie, where the price of admission is your life as you currently know it, negotiated out one self loving step at a time, but costly nonetheless. It’s costly because you are, as Jesus spoke to in a parable, selling all that you have to purchase the pearl of great price, that you surprisingly stumbled upon. You are leaving one cult in favour of another. You’re switching theatres mid movie. You are choosing your higher timeline. The price of admission is now seen as small having seen what the new story is about that life and you are admitting yourself into.

If you can’t see it this way, it may well be that you aren’t meant to. None of us are until we are, and god forbid that we would arrive at any such choice point before being readied for it to ample degree to be able to walk it out. Togetherness or integrity requires for you to live in deepest conscious alignment with your deepest values and beliefs, and anyone trying to tug on you to see otherwise is either wasting their time or just being abusive from the ground of their own insecurities. ‘They’, the ones you are letting go, need this as much as you do. Peace comes when a self permission and respect extends from your own insides, the kind you have ‘you to you’ that then extends to others along with your boundary of what you cannot be a part of any longer. A new alignment of sovereignty occurs where family members go on accepting this as a co-created reality.

There isn’t any way you living into your bigness won’t present you with painful choice points, but my truth is opting for the new and larger pair of shoes, will alleviate a lot more pain in the end. Resisting your own growth is the deeper ‘suffering over suffering’. We all have unavoidable pain in growth, the key though is to find where we are in a stuck suffering loop. We are not meant to live in managed ongoing suffering. We are meant to go through a compressing birth canal into a brave new and exciting world.

I have found that alive new world socially and personally for myself, while also feeling an open heart towards those co-actors from the previous stages of my life, that we all wrote together. I can love the people in my present as gifts to my growth and learning with an open hand similarly, having found an ever deepening home in my own heart, that no loss can ever take from me.

Ultimately, we let go of every relationship we form, and every thing we obtain, except the one relationship we form with ourselves, which is a relationship with the all, wherein we are eventually remembered with all the parts of the whole.

Audio of this blog can be found here: https://youtu.be/O_yK5Plf518

Return LOVE in money form: https://www.paypal.me/supportsoulfullheart or visit our Patreon page to become a monthly supporter: https://www.patreon.com/soulfullheart.

Spring Loaded Essence

Published on November 6, 2017November 7, 2017 by Raphael Awen3 Comments

By Raphael Awen

Essence is spring loaded within us.

It doesn’t actually need to be fought for, protected or defended.

Parts of us see it quite convincingly otherwise as something to fight for, and understandably so; for those parts of us and their reality, their experience, their truth, it’s a world of fighting along with winners and losers.

From our Higher Self’s reality however, ‘fighting for’ anything is a form of resistance and resistance presupposes an opposing other, which isn’t real to the Higher Self.

Try this feeling on for a moment from your deepest seat of being and see if it feels like your truth:

‘You are the source and essence of all that is. This essence is spring loaded within you, ever arising, ever unfolding, ever powerful, ever humble, ever seeking to experience itself through all the expressions of your being’

Does that get your resonator started?

I should note that not too many years ago, for me, the above statement would have been written off as total and complete blasphemy as I was then journeying through (unbeknownst to me at the time) the paradigm of separation between me and ‘God’. Now, I find this view not only resistive to myself, but also resistive to the ‘God’ I subscribed to, (as well as the deeper sense of God underneath my sense of ‘God’). If I was the creation of God, the reflection of God, why would God want to create ‘lessers’, who didn’t possess essence, but had to subscribe to ‘Him’ for it? I had to assume the role of the lesser, the subservient, or the worshiper to keep this ‘God’s’ ego intact. Then I would go on to chastise myself to be ‘godly’, but without any ego. It all degenerates down into a total and complete mind and heartfuck charade when it does and it is meant to. Can you feel the resistive energy in my words just now? A part of me wants to shit all over Christianity, and especially more so because this part of me has been seen and labeled as a demon. This part of me has a reality inside of resistance and wants to fuck Christianity royally, and needs to use vulgar language to get the energy across and out, as a fuck you to those who excluded and included around bullshit and the absence of love.

Bridging to this part of me from my new and arising reality which isn’t based in resistance, is to accept the part of me who has a resistance, however deep it goes. Nagging on this part of me to be other than it is only serves to suppress an energy that is sure to wreak havoc in my health and wellbeing. Getting to know and love this part of me, eventually inviting it into my reality of the joy of spring loaded essence is where a whole new adventure begins. This is my reason for being.

This is a whole new genesis story!

So when I say that ‘all is love’ and ‘there is nothing to fight’, I must be quick to acknowledge where in my being this is not true, or it’s just a shallow tinny sounding heap of spiritual horse poop! Actual horse poop is worth far more as it doesn’t pretend to be anything it isn’t. It’s the charades inside that we await coming to an end, that can then end the charades outside.

But even these charades don’t need to be fought against. Their death is also spring loaded. They don’t serve love, other than to provide contrast to love, serving as a bad example you might say. So in that, their purpose has a timestamp, like time itself does, as we return to essence being ever enlarged from the original essence we set out from.

Holeeee shit people! It’s all so holy, no amount of vulgarity or evil can take away from it, and no amount of veneration or awe can add to it. It just is and you are it!

When and as that sinks in, it leaves you in a true mission to get to know and feel every part of you for whom this isn’t true. This will keep us busy for a while yet as this true kingdom of heaven comes to reign inside where even the idea of a king and of reigning must eventually give way to love that just is!

Audio of this blog can be found here: https://youtu.be/gUtous_vHX0

Return LOVE in money form: https://www.paypal.me/supportsoulfullheart or visit our Patreon page to become a monthly supporter: https://www.patreon.com/soulfullheart.

Drop Your End Of The Rope

Published on November 6, 2017November 7, 2017 by Raphael Awen1 Comment

248

By Raphael Awen

Good and evil aren’t actually enemies.

Light and dark never actually got divorced.

We were just necessarily conditioned to see it that way for a phase of our consciousness evolution.

We needed to experience duality, the dual of one side polarized against the other as a prelude to coming back to feeling how consciousness itself is the upstream source of both, and All, and duality itself.

It’s sort of like a football team owner owning both teams that are against each other on the field level, but at the owner’s level, it is being played for purposes beyond winning, even beyond more money, having more money than he or she knows what to do with.

In time though, this upstream essence absence of duality is registering on the players, and they lose steam for the purpose at hand, become disillusioned and eventually, seek a new relationship with the energy of life that wants to flow through them. If what they were conditioned to see and feel as the game, the purpose, isn’t any longer the game, then what is the game?

Many now just want to take their toys home and quit playing. We are at such a turning point of disillusionment.

And we are at this place personally as well as collectively. It’s true intra-psychically as well as extra-psychically.

What once magically got us out of the bed every morning is no longer doing it for us in the same way. There is a growing nervous scramble to swap out the fuel system on our engines before we lose all forward momentum.

The very idea of the hero and the villain aren’t felt and seen and defined as they once were. We are watching virtually all of our greatest public heroes of the past come to be seen in a greater light, revealing their hidden darkness. We projected our own heroism onto these figures for safe keeping, kind of like a central banking scheme, now gone corrupt, except the corruption is actually a remarriage of what we tried so desperately hard to separate ourselves from. Our darkness has chosen now to ‘corrupt’ our light and thank god for it!

The darkness, whether inside of you, or external to you is not separate from you. So much of our magic as human-god-star Beings is contained in our darkness. Many pieces of our essence needed to be stored for safe keeping in our darkness and related to as part of our potential for a time when it could be watered back into known and felt and experienced reality again. We for-got in order to re-member.

It’s time now to heed a call to ambassadorship. We are still for so many practical purposes quite isolated. We’ve just got the memo, but it also doesn’t feel very true, or look very true when we look out the window. Understandably so. We’ve been conditioned deeply to live and survive in another story and the story is changing.

The genesis of this ambassadorship is within yourself.

The loving personas you’ve adapted and adopted are just that, living beings doing life as you, on your behalf, fitted to the reality ‘you’ found yourself in, that your Higher Self signed off on, that your lower self may even be pissed about. It’s all you. But none of it can be related with or embraced as long as you don’t recognize the sovereign boundaries of differentiated selves within you. ‘You’ are not sane until you come to terms with your insanity. The height of our insanity is the charade of trying to keep together the appearance and false functionality of our single personality disorder. We are not one until we have reached out to all the aspects of ourselves and lived into new ways of relating and curiously, reverentially getting-to-know.

This reality mirrors beautifully now onto the global scene where the evildoers and hidden agendas are coming to the light. This isn’t some battle of good finally winning over the dark, but rather good being faced with its own darkness and vice-versa. If we await the evil being purged thinking it will be to the relief of our tension, we miss the deeper purpose of reuniting the separated. The tension we most deeply feel isn’t about the battle between good and evil, but rather the tension of any perceived ultimate difference between good and evil.

If I am of the good, and ‘they’ are of the evil, then I must keep up the effort to maintain this war. How well I do or don’t do in this effort is overshadowed by the fact of my entrapment on this one polarizing measuring stick, good and evil being the opposite ends of the same stick. The demons inside are me and await my vulnerable and honest admission of that.

Everything is sourced in love and comes from love. There isn’t 2 any things at odds with each other. The story of good and evil, just like the story of you and I, including any perceived polarity within us, or without us, needed to be dialled up like a great stage play to get this message massaged into our consciousness.

We are left with the perception and the deep feelings of separation that are not actually the case anymore. We don’t have to achieve peace, but rather recognize the peace that already exists. Drop your end of the rope and the tug of war dissolves. If the enemy wins, you do too, for they are you and you are them.

Only now can the harm stop, when the light no longer sees itself as superior to the dark, or separate from the dark. Only now can what each side wants and needs be negotiated in true ambassadorship that recognizes difference without superiorizing or withholding love.

This is the grander story. It’s the larger container, the theatre that holds the story, for the grand awakening.

I like to feel how none of us get to be fully home until all of us get to be fully home. You coming home to yourself is in service of this as we are all one.

Who’d have guessed that the whole enemy story was all written from a place of trying to come to terms with the infinite love that we are?

Audio of this blog can be found here: https://youtu.be/BjX036nmUP8

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Our Greatest Fear

Published on November 6, 2017 by Raphael Awen4 Comments

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By Raphael Awen

Our greatest fear isn’t about our death, but rather our infinitude.

Death is simply another birth into the great unknown of our never ending being and the universe it expresses in. To accept that is to be in reverence, awe and wonder, which is to really live. To accept that is to accept your struggle with that. You don’t really ‘get’ that and neither do I.

Death and life are a great mystery that the universe itself and the divine itself is still busy exploring and it is exploring it through you and me.

Death and life are inseparable from each other, as every moment, every relationship, every being that expresses, expresses as a surrender to this mystery of death and rebirth.

Living our lives in avoidance of death or repulsion to death is to reject life itself, for life isn’t possible without death. Coming to terms with our physical death can help us come to terms with the many deaths of our lives, which in turn is the only thing that can offer us a healthy entry into our next stage and place in life.

You must leave in order to enter. We get to have life because we are willing to let it go. What makes any moment truly alive is to feel that moment’s life and its death in the same space. I enter it with a reverence that I must in turn leave it and its imprint on me as well as what I imprinted it with. Every thing and every relationship I enter, I must ultimately leave. Every Joy contains a sorrow.

If life is anything, it is reverence. To revere something is to fear it. To truly fear something is to be in awe of it, to respect it on a deep heart and soul level, is to fear losing it.

What we really fear losing is not our lives, but losing the real connection with life within our life.

Regaining that is about accepting all of our reality, even if we fall so short of understanding it. It’s about feeling it, not ‘knowing’ it in any mental or philosophical sense.

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Learning To Fly

Published on November 2, 2017November 7, 2017 by Raphael Awen6 Comments

241 Photo by Ben Goossens

By Raphael Awen

When the mama eagle decides it’s time for her eaglets to learn to fly, she rearranges the comfy nest into a thorn bush, and then a few days later proceeds to nudge them overboard. They freak out as they fall and voila, they are flying!

Life in this way seems to mirror nature and it definitely appears we are collectively and personally going through the thorny nest phase.

The chaos is being a bit pushy in asking for our surrender, running the risk of losing the point of the whole orchestration: prodding us for our surrender, while reminding us of our power.

Life isn’t demanding you surrender. You are.

You gave yourself the charades and dramas contained in life to help you see and feel your power in a way that you couldn’t otherwise. You knew and know that you lack not power, but rather a relationship with your power. You dialled up a scene of powerlessness, along with all the prickly nest feelings that go with that, as a perch from which to launch into your true power.

Life isn’t a competition of a bunch of wannabe’s trying to self realize, but rather a collaboration of the parts of one being, who chose fragmentation, and a journey returning to what it actually never lost, while becoming even more that it was at the outset. Feeling this, we can feel that life isn’t a sadomasochist hooked on causing pain and suffering, but rather life is in such possession of abundance, it isn’t afraid to spend it lavishly on lack, and dumpy living quarters if that’s what’s needed for you and I to come to a relationship with our essence.

The mama knows the eaglets can fly, but they don’t!

The universe knows stuff about you. Your higher self knows stuff about you. People around you can smell stuff about you.

You’re looking done with that thorny nest! It’s time for you to learn to fly!

Audio of this blog can be found here: https://youtu.be/dBUblrWwW74

Return LOVE in money form: https://www.paypal.me/supportsoulfullheart or visit our Patreon page to become a monthly supporter: https://www.patreon.com/soulfullheart.