Category: Guides

Digesting Christianity’s Surprise Demise: Divine Father Dialogues Day 28

Published on by Raphael AwenLeave a comment

 

Wayne's Mandala

W:  Hello, Divine Father.

DF:  Hello, Wayne.

W:  How are you digesting our last talk, or should I say ‘my last talk?’ I was a bit long winded wasn’t I?

DF:  Not long enough as far as I’m concerned, Wayne. I could listen to you tell this story over and over. When you consider how many times, and how far and wide the Christian gospel has been preached, what now cannot be called anything more than a really cheap lie, born of a really slimy intent, and how it’s been crammed down the throats of the gullible, it’s going to take some long windedness and repetition to undo.

W:  Thank you, Divine Father.  I feel some foreboding to be this outed around all this. These are fighting words for so many.

DF:  My sense is that your words will only come into the awareness of people whose hearts and souls are ready to take them in.  There’s no need for a holy war around any of this.  The fate of Christianity and Paulianity is sealed and it is in collapse now, all on it’s own accord.

W:  Yeah, and I get that’s important for someone who has been deep into Christianity, for him or her to not feel totally invaded, and left unsupported by having his or her faith shown to be a complete farce if it wasn’t something their soul was ready to see.

DF:  While that’s true, we are also fast approaching the time where Christianity itself is about to implode in on itself, of it’s own volition, as well as on account of the focused and collective energies of the human race simply wanting to learn and know and grow. When more of this collapse of Christianity happens, there will be many people simply coming unhinged in despair, anger, and chaos. It would be so much better if they were ready, but many simply won’t be.

W:  I’m curious for your digestions about what I shared yesterday.

DF:  A big dawning awareness for me, Wayne, is the realization that at the time the lie of Christianity was concocted, it was in a palpable climate of fear for one’s eternal destiny. Judaism had come to be about gaining heaven, but the price for entry for the non-Jew, as you talked about was pretty unreal. Paul’s message of ‘all you need to do is believe’ addressed this leading fear of gaining heaven and avoiding hell.

W:  And it seems that in our times, this leading fear has largely subsided for most people, even Christians.  The message of ‘turn or burn’ has lost its’ appeal in the church world, even though that message completely lines up with the tenets of the faith. It just isn’t that effective in filling pews or collection plates like it used to, so leaders necessarily play it down.

DF:  When we look at what is filling the pews today, it really is evidence of a movement in steep decline. Big box religion in it’s many varieties is becoming more and more bizarre in it’s attempts to stay afloat, and this awareness is going mainstream.

W:  What I’m curious about and wanted to discuss with you, Father, is the question of how this ploy of Paul’s became the embryo of what Western Civilization was founded upon.  Some of the things that I can see a huge resemblance in are money, business, capitalism, patriarchy, education, family, patriotism, to name just a few.  There’s a common denominator of being obedient to some form of ‘the almighty’, along with the idea that ‘non-compliance’ will surely be punished.  It seems those thematics and reality picture came from Christianity.  Other influences certainly influenced Christianity’s formation that preceded it, but Christianity it seems encapsulated and launched some really big things.

DF:  Things like duty, obligation, penalty…

W:  …and the idea that came with that is when all of these are satisfied, you’ll be allowed a measured dessert of happiness.

DF:  Do you really feel, Wayne, that Paul’s worldview, or the Paulianity he created from his worldview, became the foundation of Western Civilization?

W:  I don’t know. I thought you’d know.

DF:  You sounded like you knew a moment ago.

W:  That was just a part of me trying to sound academic. Truth is, I don’t know, and I’m certainly not an Academic, but, I do suspect it may be way more true than any of us have realized up till now. More than suspect it, I feel it to be true.

DF:  Well, I’m with you on the not knowing, as well as the feeling.  Let’s see what we can sort through of it.

W:  I figured you’d be up for it.

DF:  This one is way too important to pass up.

W:  Especially when we consider that western civilization is so evidently near the end of whatever it is and that something new is in the making.

DF:  Where do we start, Wayne?

W:  Well, for me, what comes is the question about why did I have such a deep implant for most of my adult life that said ‘When I get ahead, then I will obtain the life I really want, then I will explore my creativity and gifts.’

DF:  Let’s try and feel that together on its’ most fundamental level. ‘Ahead’ feels like a form of obtaining heaven, wouldn’t you say? Or is that too simplistic?

W:  That rings true for me, Father. Paulianity was all about addressing something missing or lacking. Wow.

DF:  Which raises the question if there really was anything lacking.

W:  That one is really so big, Father, when I feel it. That energy permeated my entrance into Christianity and my focus inside of it. It also really speaks to how I entered my first marriage and raising 2 daughters, with a big ideal of being a good father. It certainly speaks to the focused and intense input of energy into learning and growing the painting business for me.

DF:  So, Wayne, What do you now feel is the underneath that energy of getting ahead?

W:  It goes so much deeper than mere thinking I need to get ahead, but to a much more primal feeling of wanting to feel something about myself that I couldn’t access or experience, way down in the basement of my being. It was a feeling that I was somehow on the wrong side of all that is good and alive and meaningful, and I needed to find my way there, somehow, some way, to something utopian.

DF:  Sounds like that favored verse in Romans; ‘All have sinned and fallen short of the glory of God, but the gift of God is life eternal.’ A hundred and ten percent Paulianity again to the rescue, wouldn’t you say?

W:  Totally. Another Wow. The very idea of being separate from all that is good…, Can we really credit Paul with that much influence?

DF:  These deep feelings were a deep part of humanity’s search long before Paul, but no one coalesced them into such a potent force with as far reaching effects is my truth. The first and most successful corporation isn’t McDonalds or Apple, it’s none other than the Roman Catholic Church.  Roman Catholicism asserts that the apostle Peter was it’s first Pope, but only as a way to hide the fact that it was Paul’s ruthless life’s work that seeded it’s reality into being, and in turn seeded all of Christianity that flowed from its’ Roman beginnings to this very day.

W:  …and in turn, seeded a pervasive way of life into my being, 2 millenniums later.

DF:  Wayne, this is really important to feel and to take stock of, and to own. That who you are, and how you feel about life on so many levels, was passed on to you through the DNA of a culture, which originated in a feeling state, in this case the feeling state was and is separation from divinity. This formed the reality in which you swam, but left you without a conscious relationship with the water. You became the reality of the cultural conditioning that was handed down to you on so many levels, and in so many ways, until you began to consciously feel your way through that conditioning.

W:  The beginning of a great awakening…

DF:  The beginning of great awakening, yes, and one that really never ends.  The human race needed to come to know itself and fulfill itself in all of it’s potential.  The only way to this was by collective journey and discovery, and it seems really evident to me, that that journey had to begin with an externalized god. Paul was only championing a new and better way to gain access to and favor with this separate out-there God.  Deep in collective consciousness was a felt sense of separation, so deep that it is still felt today.  Paul’s ploy, born out of his own felt sense of wanting to bridge his own feelings of separation, in his case through power and dominance in the name of god, could only find traction because of where humanity was at collectively.

W:  So then Paul isn’t to blame quite like the way I want to give him a really swift kick in the ass?

DF:  You’d have to kick yourself along with all of humanity in the ass if you needed to carry out a punishment.

W:  That would be a lot of ass kicking.

DF:  The paradox here though is that even looking for whom to blame, and the need to blame and punish comes from this felt state of separation.

W:  Like how?

DF:  Separation presumes a gulf between humanity and divinity. In that presumption is of course a guilty party, and of course, this ‘God’ is designated to be perfect in the infinite sense, so that leaves humanity culpable.  Oh, and don’t forget, it was here that nature was blamed and made bad and dirty, along with humanity. It was human nature that was said to be fallen. From there it seeks to offer a bridge, which is its’ good news amidst all the bad news.

W:  Good news amidst the bad news, that’s the ploy of all of slimy salesmanship today.

DF:  And from start to finish, all of this is conceived and has its’ reality only as long as the story of separation holds dominion.

W:  So then what’s the reality of the matter if it isn’t separation?

DF:  The new story is that humanity was never separate from divinity, and never separate from nature, and nature was never fallen.  It was just the power of the old story that was endorsed in the collective that gave it a deep and pervasive felt reality.

W:  It’s like, Father, that, we are not so much in relationship as we are relationship itself.

DF:  Try and wrap your mind around that one, huh?

W:  I know I just said it, but I can’t quite really imagine what it means.

DF:  Humanity was and is inseparably a part of, not apart from. Being in relationship requires 2 or more in separation is how I’d say it. Being relationship itself presumes oneness.

W:  I like that, somehow, what looks a lot like 2 or more has in fact become one.

DF:  This is the dawning awareness of Jesus actual words ‘as you do to others, so you do unto yourself,’ rather than the moral prescription version of those words that made it into the bible of ‘do unto others as you would have them do unto you.’ One presumes a separate self, and projects obligation and duty and the other version presumes oneness and love.

W:  That’s totally cool.

DF:  Like majorly cool.

W:  So then, me wanting to fix blame on Paul is evidence that Paulianity is still alive and well in me, though I left Paulianity 10 years ago now, and as fast as I could, I might add.

DF:  True, but these are the cultural realities that pervade the entire culture, the things you live and breathe in every day that are invisible. You may have personally moved a long way from this consciousness, but while humanity is still largely beholden to the culture of separation, you cannot be totally free of it. If you could, that would mean separation is real.

W:  So how and when do we move on from this yawning trap of separation then? Do we all have to wait for everyone to get it?

DF:  The truth is that you already are moving from the grip of separation.  If you are feeling it personally, that means humanity is feeling it. The soul of humanity agreed to enter the dark night of the soul of separation so as to complete it and graduate from it, into what comes after it.

W:  Which is?

DF:  Which is an entire world made knew, by a new story, it’s inhabitants and participants living from oneness, one with self; one with divinity; one with each other; one with all of nature. Change the story, and you change everything.

W:  So it’s like we need a new Paul to come along to seed and birth this new story then?

DF:  Actually, this story could never be born into consciousness by one hero savior figure.  It’s being born by many hero’s, changing many worlds and many cultures.

W:  Sort of sounds like a Messianic deliverance?

DF:  Except, this Messiah has already come. It just is.  People just living their way more and more into this consciousness, as their every day reality is what is ushering in this sea change of reality, a whole mass of Messiahs if you will.

W:  With a current world population of seven plus billion, that’s a whole lot of souls. That should make for a pretty good show.

DF:  Best to show up early and get a good seat, I’d say.

W:  But its’ also, Father, a great death of the old way in which many souls will perish in the chaos of all this collapse.

DF:  Souls cannot perish, Wayne. Lives can be lost, and that is tragic, on the human level. But a soul doesn’t feel it that way. A soul doesn’t consider it a great loss to live a life with a tragic human end. For a soul, this can be a great turning in what they chose to come here to learn and feel. Many souls asleep to what is befalling the world is actually necessary for it to manifest.

W:  Necessary? Ouch!

DF:  I know that sounds harsh to your Pauline ears, as if God had decided that it should be that way. No, nature decided it that way. Nature doesn’t mind evolving. Nature doesn’t mind trial and error, and instead sees it all as simply learning.

W:  Wow, I must have a part of me still pretty into some Pauline conditioning as you call it, because I’m not all the way on board with that.

DF:  It’s not that nature is sadist. The inherent value isn’t in the suffering; it’s in the learning in the midst of suffering. And all of the learning is about returning to essence.

W:  That I’m more on board with.

DF:  Good.

W:  Do you think we just sorted out a bunch of the world’s problems?

DF:  A pretty good chunk I’d say.

W:  No wonder I’m tired, that was a lot.

DF:  Well, go rest then, so we can do this again.  We may not be done.

W:  Will do. Thank you, Father.

DF:  Thank you! That was awesome.

Wayne Vriend is a co-founder of Soulfullheart Community, healer and author of 90 Days With Yeshua. Visit soulfullheart.com for more information.

 

Christianity’s Surprise Demise: Divine Father Dialogues Day 27

Published on by Raphael AwenLeave a comment

 

Wayne's Mandala

W:  Good Morning, Divine Father.

DF:  Hey, Good Morning, Wayne.

W:  I have a plan where I’d like to go with you today…

DF:  And where’s that?

W:  I’ve been digesting a book I’ve been re-reading called The Event That Created Christianity by Eric Zuesse, and it’s been calling to me again. I want to ask you to hear me out on this story.

DF:  Sounds good, Wayne, tell me about it.

W: Here comes a bunch of content if you’re up for it?

DF:  For sure, I’m up for it.

W:  Okay, here goes…So in Paul’s letter to his converts in Galatia, the very earliest of New Testament writings, though still some 20 years after Jesus’ death, Paul is forced to deal with an arising issue that’s going to blow the lid off of his life’s work unless he can wrangle it under some kind of control. Paul has been an influential and rising leader over the past 14 years in the sect of Judaism that Jesus started. The movement is now under James leadership, that’s Jesus’ brother whom he appointed just before Jesus was put to death by the Roman authorities for sedition against Rome.  Paul, however, has been off to one side of this movement considerably, as he has been introducing gentiles (as in non-jews) into the sect, successfully so, and herein is the mounting problem, which I’ll get to in a moment.  Paul; though a contemporary of Jesus admittedly has never met the man; who also has proudly had little to do with Jesus’ disciples. Paul, though he is credited for authoring over two thirds of the New Testament, strangely never referenced a single teaching or life experience of the earthly Jesus. Here in the letter to the Galatians, some 17 years into his work with the Jesus sect, for the first time, Paul claims to not only have met Jesus’ ghost in a physical resurrected apparition, but to have been certified by him in this apparition to be god’s anointed messenger. Paul now comes on with monstrous claims saying that the god of Judaism had changed his mind on everything he had previously sworn off on that he would never change his mind on. In other words, God is now completely pulling the pin on Judaism.  Problem is Paul had sold these converts on Judaism, and he has to master mind his choice of words and timing so as to keep a hugely hidden agenda adequately hidden. Paul is as hokey as this god he claims to have met. Problem is, hokey or not, Paul has been successfully attracting these non Jewish converts probably by the thousands, to this Jesus sect for some time selling them on something very different than what he is debuting now. Nobody has ever called themselves ‘Christian’ in any way shape or form, including Paul, and certainly not Jesus. Worshipping a Christ, as far as a follower of Judaism is concerned, is as false as any of the other forbidden pagan religions of the day. Judaism is the deal here, and if Judaism is anything, it’s one unitary God, no Son, and certainly no ghost, holy or otherwise.

Paul, is for the very first time rolling out something of epic proportions, again admittedly, to save his own ass, speaking of stuff that is unequivocally anathema to everything Jesus and his specific Judaistic sect of followers held dear, not to mention all the rest of Judaism, and not to mention all of what Paul himself had previously taught. He’s betting the farm though that his converts won’t see through it.

Paul, tells his converts that though he had been up until some 17 years prior obsessed with persecuting this Jewish movement with a murderous zeal. Then through his claimed conversion experience, on the road to Damascus to carry out his persecutions, god knocked him off his horse and called him to take his message to the world. The god he claimed to have had this completely unheard of encounter with (except maybe for Moses and the Burning Bush) rewards him somehow with a special revelation and calling.

DF:  Only the true god would do such a thing, right? Confounding human wisdom and all of that.

W:  Totally. Now, Paul’s been running this convert circus for non-jews into this Jesus sect for the last 14 years while hiding from his converts how very much off to the side, and completely out of collaboration with what Jesus’ disciples have been doing and teaching that Paul’s work actually is.  Pardon me, Father, if I’m repeating myself a bit here.

DF:  No problem, I’m tracking. I get you have to get this out.

W:  Thank you, Father, yes, I so do. Back to my story.

So now, the growing problem behind the scenes with this rapidly growing group of converts is a deal breaker, and the issue strangely, to our ears at least, has to do with the cock. These converts are not circumcised. They are not like the Jewish babies who were circumcised on the eighth day, according to the command of god in Judaism. If there is one defining issue of a follower of Judaism, laid out in Genesis chapter 17, verse 14, as a completely non-negotiable, forever and unchanging deal, it’s circumcision. James and his group finally comes full out and says ‘it’s circumcision or the door.’ Snip, snip, snip. Circumnavigate the penis with a scissors of all things! Maybe, we can thank Paul for trying to put the brakes on that one, but really, he could have cared less if it was about amputating the penis. In fact, he explicitly said that he wished castration upon the circumcision group who were opposing him. This opposing group however is none other than Jesus’ brother and closest disciples; James, Peter and John. For me personally, Father, it wasn’t until the eve of my journey in Christianity that I could see that what was plain as day in this text, that Paul was in conflict with the very leaders that Jesus left in his place.  I, like Christians everywhere, simply could not see such a travesty, for to see it, would erode everything Paul and his later followers set out to establish.  These ‘Judaizers,’ as he calls them were not some oppositional group that challenged him, but in fact the very ones who had earlier authorized him to take the message of Jesus outside of the Jewish population to what they call, the gentiles.  Paul is finally making his complete break with the movement Jesus begun to begin a brand new religion.

Paul was a con artist like no other. His hoax has endured for 2000 years, and even came to form the basis for the entire western civilization even deeply affecting the way of life for all westerners, not only Christians.

DF:  My god, Wayne. I don’t know what to say…. and of course, the women didn’t count for much….

W: Nope, no penis, no say. If only the women had a role in this, this pissing match parade about who’s included and who’s not wouldn’t have dominated our culture for all these years. Neither Judaism, nor Christianity would ever have came into existence had it not been for this battle of gender dominance. I guess it’s what we needed as a species on some level, to learn our way into something new.

DF:  Please go on…

W:  So now, the men in Paul’s thriving group are in no mind to sign up for circumcision, like Jesus’ true followers are finally asserting they must do, after some waffling on the matter. These men prefer instead to keep their cocks intact, thank you very much. Back in the first century, there isn’t any antibiotics, no antiseptics and no anesthetics. Just surviving such an operation and avoiding the risk of infection and death was a very tall order, and of course, one wrong slip of the knife on a writhing, screaming unsedated patient, and he’s now castrated.  The offer for an eternal heaven, for this temporal pain, had no takers, and Paul didn’t need to take a survey to know that. He had sold them on a much cheaper heaven without the price and seal of circumcision. Paul has his boatload of uncircumcised converts; wealthy; Roman; embracing what’s left of Jesus’ brand of Judaism; and he doesn’t intend to lose them.  But James has called it. It’s circumcision or expulsion.

DF:  Trim the cock or cut the flock…

W:  Totally. Paul had been betting that James was going to go with the flow as he had for some time, but obviously working his plan ‘b’ in case he didn’t. Paul had hoped that his continuing flow of shekels to the much poorer Jesus followers in Jerusalem would be enough to keep James quiet on the circumcision issue. It was all good until it wasn’t.  Now Paul’s cock was in compliance being born a Jew, no problem there, but his followers were not, and Paul’s life’s work would be in his own ambitious words ‘to have run in vain.’  This group that has been converted to what they’ve been led to believe is the Jesus sect of Judaism are now, surprisingly forced to choose between James, the sect’s overall leader, or Paul, their leader and teacher. Paul goes nuclear and claims that James, whom Jesus appointed leader before his death is in fact God’s enemy, along with the apostles who actually lived with and knew Jesus, because they are opposing what he openly calls his gospel. He in fact boasts, that he never knew the earthly Jesus ‘according to the flesh’ as the apostles prior to him did, but he knows the risen Christ ‘according to the spirit,’ and how that supersedes the ‘earthly apostles’ by nothing less than the decree of God. Holeee Moses, Wouldn’t you say?

DF:  “What is a preacher to do?”

W:  Hahaha, nice touch on the Indian accent, Father.  Paul decides to pull the God-told-me card in a way that’s really never been matched before or since. He makes the first ever claim to this group of people, that god’s son’s ghost appeared to him and called him to lead a new religion; that the apostles who met Jesus don’t count and circumcision is no longer the deal and the ones’ who are calling for it are in fact god’s enemies, and even the enemies of all men no less. Paul straps a rocket onto the ass of whatever exists at that time in the way of anti-Semitism and anti-Judaism in one fell swoop, and puts the Jewish heaven on sale for a bargain like no other. Only faith in a resurrected-after-death Christ is now the only requirement, which he calls ‘the true circumcision of the heart.’

DF:  You can just feel the men relaxing about now.

W:  I get to keep my beloved cock intact. Wow, I mean, maybe a toe or a finger, but who came up with the cock trimming idea and built a religion around it, I can’t for the life of me figure out.

DF:  That was that Heavenly Father dude man. He’s like the ultimate gang leader really, way beyond tattoo’s and piercings. It’s drop the drawers and prove it, or it’s get out the knife. I am God and there is NONE like me. He knew no one else had the balls to match those entry requirements but surely knew that sooner or later, someone would come along and try to reduce them…?

W:  Like a Paul, the very archetype of a con artist, who just so happened, by a very unique and well documented chain of events, in the Christian Bible no less, to need to save his swollen ass at any expense.

DF:  Sounds a bit like the Jimmy Swaggart, Jim Baker and Jerry Falwell debacle back in the eighties…

W:  You tracked that one huh?

DF:  Wouldn’t have missed it for anything, Wayne.

W:  Not that unusual at all really, just another coup d’etat in religion land really, other than the penis trimming. Any church split that we see today is pretty much the same thing. Paul is just a slimy salesman like no other and possibly never been matched in his ruthlessness to save his self image and power. His original draw to ‘The Almighty’ reflects NOT his devotion to God, but rather his lifelong and unrelenting worship of power.

DF:  You say this isn’t that unusual… but it’s majorly interesting I’d say…

W:  Majorly, with a capital M, because of where this deal is headed. Now Paul unrolls his plan b in the most careful and cunning and crafty language with very carefully planned stages and timings of what could be said to whom and when without caving in this house of cards deal, and the crazy thing is, he just barely does it, but he does it. As I said, he’s saving his own ass, trashing the person and message of Jesus in favor of his completely invented and connived Christ message.

Then he decides to take it to the next level, and teaches that obeying the Roman authorities is the equivalent to obeying god. Paul curries the favor of the Roman occupiers. Paul himself is a Jew, but an honorary Roman citizen by birth because of his father. He knows an opportunity when he sees one. Judaism and Jesus, both of whom clearly stood opposed to the Roman occupation, are left in the dust, and the followers of Paul, now called ‘Christ’-ians are off to the races, even courting the favor of the Roman regime. Problem is though that the Romans are on record for killing Jesus for sedition against Rome.  Paul knew the Romans couldn’t embrace a religion, whose founder they had in fact had killed. That would leave the Romans guilty of deicide, which is killing god. Paul is forced to change this story, by blaming Jesus’ death on the Jewish leaders in order to absolve the Romans of any blame in it, saying that Pilate and the Roman soldiers simply carried out the demands of the Jewish leaders.  It’s now late in Paul’s life, and many decades after the murder of Jesus, with Paul’s non Jewish followers not having much sensitivity to such racist claims, that such a ludicrous idea could hold a shred of credibility.  Paul would have been himself crucified if he had tried to pull of any of this earlier in the game. So there you have it, Christianity now went Roman.

DF:  Triple wow, so now, 2000 years later, the story is finally unraveling…

W:  Big time, Father. For me, this story rings really true, but still, many questions came up for me around my conditioning. What about the accounts in the gospels of Matthew, Mark, Luke and John?  But then I learned that these were all written decades after Paul unveiled his new religion, not prior, as they appear to be because of their placement as the first books of the New Testament. By the time of the gospel writings, Paul’s gospel has for decades been center stage, Jesus following has long been marginalized and even demonized and now it is Paul’s own loyal followers, who set out to write accounts of Jesus life to fit their very Pauline agenda. Not one of the gospels are written by any supposed disciple and contemporary of Jesus, as most Christians assume.  Had they been written anytime near the life of Jesus when the readers who knew of Jesus or his movement would have loudly protested and rejected these accounts would simply have not found the light of day.  Instead, now, 5 and 6 decades after the life of Jesus, we have a perfect climate for the writers of those gospels to insert into the mouth of Jesus the necessary pieces to make this all fly. Like the saying goes ‘History is written by those in power.’

DF:  And by now, those in power are jumping onto the best boat afloat and that meant Paul’s deal.

W:  Totally, nothing else was paying the bills and to this day, nothing has compared, in western society at least, to what Paul got off the ground over his lifetime and others took up and grew it to the mammoth proportions of Big Box Religion. Even business patterned itself after Paul’s deal, not to mention morality, or most all of our social structures, money, and on and on goes the list…

DF:  And you once thought Paul was the most devout and holy guy in the room.

W:  I did. I really did. I didn’t just think it. I ‘knew’ it way down deep inside. It’s what I was taught, and believed and gave my life to, and drew my self-worth from, along with the 2 billion people who presently call themselves Christians of one stripe or another.

DF:  Until you saw through it…

W:  …and Paul’s Christ became nothing more than a con artist’s farce perpetrated upon the human race for the last 2000 years.

DF: This is so striking and far-reaching. It changes so much. I can’t even begin to comprehend all that this now reveals.

W:  I can’t even begin to know what to do with it, Father.  For anyone who isn’t ready to see it, it is likely to remain hiding in plain sight, or at least that’s the way it has been up till now.

DF:  This is one of those things, Wayne, where just one soul, and one more, seeing through this hoax, and taking it into their hearts and lives, and coming free has a multiplication effect. You will see the complete downfall of Christianity in your lifetime. I firmly believe that. I’m surprised every day that its’ inertia keeps it coasting along as it does.

W:  What is there that I can say to the Christian reading this, and who suspects what I’ve shared is true?

DF:  You can tell them to honor themselves, and honor the people around them by choosing to leave, putting feet to that choice and letting their lives be a part of a new day. You can tell them to honor the time they needed to be beholden of Paul’s Christ, as part of their own search for the divine, and to honor this time the human race needed, and to graciously accept this dawning knowledge as their soul’s graduation into more life, more learning, more quest into what’s real and what isn’t.

W:  Thank you, Father. Thank you for feeling this story.

DF:  Thank you for telling it.

W:  I’m not sure we got to what’s tweaking me though about this story.

DF:  I think we did, Wayne.

W:  What’s that?

DF:  It’s a prophetic sense of what is soon time to be dawning on collective consciousness. You sharing this is part of the undermining and collapse of the pillars of the faith, and those reading this and taking it in, is all a part of the great change. If you thought Christianity’s stranglehold on the human race was intense, wait till you behold humanity’s liberation from Christianity.

W:  So, it’s a wait and see, then.

DF:  In one sense, yes, but in another, it’s a living and alive reality unfolding now. You get to see it now because it is given to you to see, and to help others ready to see. This is a first-fruits of deep and profound change. If you’re up for it, that is?

W:  I’m up for it.

DF:  Then fasten your seatbelt and get ready for the ride, because it is going to pick up noticeably and surprisingly.

Raphael Awen is co-creator and facilitator of the SoulFullHeart Way Of Life. Visit the SoulFullHeart website  for more information about virtual sessions with him.

I Am Many And We Are One: Divine Father Dialogues Day 26

Published on by Raphael AwenLeave a comment

Wayne's Mandala

 

W: Hello Divine Father.

DF: Hello Divine Son.

W: Yes, thank you. I do feel divine at times, other times not as much. It’s really cool though to be reminded that I am divinity expressing in the world, and that I can connect with you as a son.

DF: Let’s do that today.

W: Which brings me to what I’d like to talk with you about today.

DF: What’s that?

W: You mentioned yesterday about having healthy boundaries, and that made me feel how historically with people I’ve struggled between wanting to be totally direct and call a spade a spade, as they say, and being the way I learned to be in customer service, well liked and chosen for the contract and paid well, and all of that. That polarity seems to have followed me to the present day. So today, I journaled with the 2 parts of me who have held each end of that, and we all felt we wanted to get your input around healthy boundaries and see what they look like in action?

DF: I think we could have fun with that today, Wayne. Where would you start it off?

W: How about I just dive in around my quandaries and you can feel how to respond?

DF: Totally.

W: Okay. There’s the quandary about what to do with something I really dislike in a person or something they said. I’m already feeling the answer has to do with a middle way between love and truth telling, but I could use some guidance and coaching on that one for sure. Then there’s a reticence I feel to be direct when there is something I fear losing from the person. All those years of not being emotionally honest with clients let me win the contract, but took a toll on my deeper desired way of being in relationships. I had to enter a role that had some real me in it, but also had something I no longer want with people.

DF: I so get, Wayne, the feeling of wanting to shed a layer of something that once served you, felt like who you were then, but simply feels clumsy and awkward today. Let me ask you, what does it feel like you’d want most to change for you relationally?

W: It feels like, Father, what I’d really like is to find this middle ground of being where it doesn’t take much debate inside, where it simply flows in a balance of embodied truth telling and real care for the person, as well as for myself, advocating for what I want and don’t want.

DF: I think we could end the conversation right here, Wayne, because you said it all in a nutshell.

W: I did.

DF: You did.

W: But I didn’t say I found it, I said I want to find it.

DF: I’m just feeling how you’ve done your homework on this one, and you are already at the deep desire stage, which is what comes just before the new opening. Your next step is simply walking that out in the situations that life puts across your path.

W: Does that mean you don’t want to talk about it?

DF: Well, hold on, let’s see what’s in the tank to help out with….

W: Thank you.

DF: Boundaries are the line between you and the other person, you and the world, you and I for that matter. While it is true that we are all one and the lines between us are not real on one level, it is also true that we are unique and distinctly separate beings. Both are true. The analogy that feels real to me is that while the body has many distinct members or parts, if one of those members suffer, then all the members suffer. Collectively, we are one. Individually, we are also one. Did you get that?

W: Not sure I did.

DF: Not sure I did either, to tell you the truth, so I was hoping you got it. Downloading like this takes paying attention, even for me.

W: You said that collectively as well as individually, we are one. That’s interesting. What I feel in that is that it could be said in another way; collectively and individually, we are many, from which arises our oneness.

DF: And oneness doesn’t exclude individuality, but rather enhances it and backlights it. So, what you are seeking help with today is as an individual who wants to take responsibility for what he is putting in to the collective oneness. That’s oneness contributing to oneness again. Cool huh?

W: I think so, but I’m not sure I’m getting your point. Is it one of those things that I need to meditate on to let in deeper?

DF: I’m not really sure of my point either, Wayne. I told you, you already had this figured out, but you still wanted to talk, so I just figured to feel it together and see where it takes us. I suspect it will turn up something good, but I can’t guarantee it. It’s up to both of us as well as the universe.

W: I’m good with that actually, really good, in fact. Fresh home-cooked is way better than canned.

DF: Okay, hang on, something’s coming. I think we got onto why all it takes is one. I know that’s a pretty saying, but this has some traction here. If the oneness of the individual contributes to the oneness of the collective, then all it takes for that to be initiated into consciousness is for it to be embodied in one, and oneness takes it into being.

W: Are you saying that I could single handedly change the world?

DF: Yes and No. It takes the whole world to change the world, as seed and plant and soil and air and sun are needed. While that’s true, what is also true is that any change that comes into the world always begins as a single seed. So, in this, every action and choice you make are sending out waves of deep change into the collective as single seeds being introduced into consciousness. You changing you, changes the collective and is an essence of the oneness you all are together.

W: So none of us are out changing one soul at a time here?

DF: The only soul that can be changed one soul at a time is yours, you to you. And if you change, all change.

W: I can’t help but feel an energy that counters the energy you are feeling though, Father. I mean, the more I have changed, the more undesirable humanity, at times, has felt to me. It felt like I left them behind, rather than changed them.

DF: But the humanity you embody means that you changed humanity’s way of being by embodying it in seed form, that was planted by your being, in real time, in real human relationships and circumstance. I think, Wayne, what the universe is offering, as we wade into feeling this domain together about healthy boundaries is that you and everyone of your kind is actually so much bigger than you have until now conceived, but is now unstoppably dawning on your horizon. You are simply an early adopter of what humanity itself is desiring. You didn’t come up with this quandary of how to be more authentic and agile in relationships. The universe came up with it and you volunteered. The entire human race and universe holds the desire.

W: So that makes me a vessel, as we used to say in Christianity.

DF: … a true vessel of honor, for sure. Divinity, no less.

W: Okay, Christianity would choke on that part.

DF: It takes all of humanity choking on this part to finally come to it.

W: So there’s a time factor though that we need to get some patience around?

DF: Not for you, Wayne. You get to have it now. I mean, does that feel real?

W: I get to be a first partaker like you said yesterday, and that is having it now, because I’m holding it for all, not just for me. When the all comes to living it out in conscious reality is not when my fulfillment kicks in. It kicks in now. And my future now won’t be any better as my present now.

DF: I’m surprised by where this went today, Wayne. I figured we were going to talk about healthy boundaries in some other way, but somehow, this piece was needed first and all I can say is stay tuned, and to be continued. My down loader needs a break.

W: I will stay tuned. Thank you for this ride. I’ll be looking forward to where we go. This one doesn’t feel complete.

DF: Time for a siesta.

W: Si, Senor.

Wayne Vriend is a co-founder of Soulfullheart Community, healer and author of 90 Days With Yeshua. Visit soulfullheart.com for more information.

The Cult Of Family: Dialogues With Divine Father Day 23

Published on by Raphael AwenLeave a comment

 

Wayne's Mandala

W: Hello again, Divine Father.

DF: Hello again, Wayne.

W: I wondered, Father, if we have more to talk about regarding cults.

DF: I’ll bet we do.

W: Okay, let’s go there then.

DF: What about the family cult, Wayne?

W: The family cult is the first cult we join and as such is so engrossing, that we are so embedded in it, within our larger cult of society.

DF: I think maybe you need to lead this on a personal note, Wayne, to make it more real for anyone reading this. Tell a bit of your story around family if you feel okay doing that.

W: Okay. I think I can do that. For a number of years now, I have had almost no interaction with any family. It was not the typical ‘we don’t see eye to eye on things’ that led us apart. It was me advocating for change within the family dynamic, while letting go of the faith I was raised in. My mother tried to keep that together by suggesting we all could get along in the midst of our differences. Which essentially meant, still being apart of family gatherings and just not talking about any of the differences. With me leaving the Christian faith, and in their judgments of me, and me being in judgment of them for being so unwilling to look beyond their borders, it left us only in clash, covered over with a polite, but toxic pleasantness.

DF: What’s been the difficult part of your choices?

W: I chose to leave the family cult, but I didn’t want to leave any one of them. I was attached to them, and largely couldn’t imagine my life without them. I raised my daughters into their late teens with the hope and desire that these would be two treasured women enriching my life into my mid life and golden years. The family connection spread through parents, grandparents, sons and daughters, aunts, uncles, cousins, nieces and nephews was and is a potent connection with many nourishing things that I to this day miss, but also with a huge toxic element that I am relieved to no longer be a part of. The difficult part of my choices has been knowing that in all likelihood, most wouldn’t be able to join me on my journey, and with me not willing to be any longer in any kind of falseness with them, that this meant parting paths. This means lovingly letting them go, and letting my bond with them go, but with an open door.

DF: Say more about the open door.

W: The door is open in that I would welcome contact from any family member if there were genuine curiosity and respect for me, including my choices and values. This is the same condition that I wish that they would hold for themselves in every relationship they have.

DF: Can you say more about what it’s like now for you to be in life without the family connection?

W: I feel a peacefulness inside of myself, as well as a love for each one of them. There isn’t the conflictual tugging on each other.

DF: So why is family rated so highly, Wayne, when admittedly most find it so hard to tolerate, and even dislike with a passion?

W: This feels like an interview, Father, I think I feel your tack here and I’m really enjoying your interested questions, and your desire I feel to put this out there for anyone ready to embrace it.

DF: Nothing like the learning that occurs in the university of true curiosity in relationality.

W: I feel the death grip we have on the family cult and why it is so pervasive has to do with the deepest vulnerability of being human. We are clearly meant to be in family. It’s just that if we settle for the current working definition of family, that only ensures that we will never be a part of true family.

DF: Why’s that?

W: It’s interesting that the word family and familiar are so close in origin, yet the energy of family is conformity to belong rather inquiry into individual uniqueness, which would lead to real familiarity with oneself. For the individual to grow, they must chose to become familiar with themselves outside of the family. I feel why family as we know it today is so praised and so valued and revered in and across our many cultures is that it serves as the perfect excuse for the individual not to grow, to not risk, to stay safe where they are.

DF: Wayne, okay, now you’re tweaking me so much I have to jump in.

W: Good, I was feeling a bit wordy.

DF: What I wanted to add was that only as an individual is in exploration with themself, or as you and I like to say, with themselves, as in getting to know their parts, are they out of the flat line existence where they have something alive to bring to relationship.

W: …where they could be valued as interesting and meaningful because they are contributing to something alive instead of cosigning a pact to stay dead as is the case of what we agreed is family today.

DF: Co-signing a pact to stay in deadness. Is it really that stark, Wayne, to you?

W: From my experience, and inside of me, it is nothing less than that. All wounding and all healing happens inside of relationship, and as we said yesterday, all relationships are in fact a cult unto themselves. It will take new cults and new relationships to take us out of the old and into the new. I feel I have inhabited that and lived my way into that to prove it to myself, and offer a landing place to anyone else who feels this is also their truth and who’d like to live into this reality for themselves. And you know what, Father?

DF: What?

W: Christopher has prepared dinner, and I’m hungry.

DF: This was perfect, Wayne, go eat. We’ll pick up soon.

W: Thank you, Father, for the interview.

DF: You’re welcome.

Raphael Awen is co-creator and facilitator of the SoulFullHeart Way Of Life.  Visit the SoulFullHeart website  for more information about virtual sessions with him.

I See You: Message To The False Self

Published on by Jelelle AwenLeave a comment

The following is a message that Jelelle received from the Divine Mother directed toward the false self in us all:

I see you. You there, reading these words. I feel you. You there, taking in these words. I know you. You there, blocking out these words. I want you. You there, curious about these words.

You there….I see, feel, know, and want you. I see you because I have witnessed your creation. You were a necessary aspect of human evolution. You were a surprise, an arising that I didn’t expect. Your time of unconscious dominance is nearing its inevitable end. Yet, you are wanted. Wanted by me and wanted by the sacred human seed that you protect so vigilantly.

Wait, was I not supposed to see that seed? Was I not supposed to want that seed to grow? I planted that seed in every human being. I planted that seed so that it would grow. Seeds need to be watered. Seeds need to bloom. You have been so long protecting that seed, you’ve forgotten the nature of that seed and of yourself.

Let me introduce you to that seed: That seed is the sacred human. That seed will blossom into a sacred human heart that can hold you. That seed will grow into a sacred human heart that can feel you. That seed will become a sacred human heart that can heal you. Rather than protecting that seed from growing, you are meant to let that seed grow and feel protected by what it blossoms into.

Is this difficult for you to accept? Do you resist what I am offering? That’s ok. The sacred human self can hold those feelings too. You feel resistance because you haven’t experienced enough real love. You feel difficulty in accepting this because you haven’t experienced enough real love. You don’t want to let in what I am offering because you haven’t experienced enough real love.

I don’t know how much of this you can let in right now or much you are supposed to let in. I only know what is possible if you do. What is possible is that finally you can experience real love. In the experience of real love, you are able to share your reactions, your tensions, your feelings, your pains, your joys, your desires, your fears, your dreams, your resistance,  your ache…ALL of it.

You can finally let go of what you’ve been holding so closely that you haven’t been able to see it. You wear all of it like an armor that blocks out and resists real love. You can be released from this armour, but the process and pace of removing it is completely up to you.

I see you choosing paths and teachers promising you bliss, promising you enlightenment, promising you freedom from everything that you feel, promising you that YOU get to remain as YOU without question. This is not what I am offering will lead to real healing for you. You must become real….come out as what we are calling the ‘false self’ and all of its parts….in order to experience real love. No more hiding. You must step forward and say, “Ok, I am open to being a false self. I am curious about this sacred human seed. I am ready to be felt.”

That’s it. That’s all you have to do and the rest will naturally happen from there. That doesn’t mean there won’t be challenges and difficulties. Giving up what is false to experience real love is painful at times, very challenging at times…..but the challenges are worth the reward of experiencing real love and finally being able to rest and breathe and heal. To finally be real.

It’s your choice. You can keep seeking and searching down paths that don’t directly challenge you as a false self. But I think we both know where those lead. You are just putting off the inevitable need for you to experience direct healing. Or you can choose to begin your journey into healing of your heart, discovering your true essence, and experiencing real love. That’s the choice I want for you. That’s the choice I’m waiting for you to make. That’s the choice that brings you to me and into my arms of real love.

With love,

Your Divine Mother

Jelelle Awen is co-creator and facilitator of the SoulFullHeart Way Of Life. Go here to connect with Jelelle on facebook. Visit the SoulFullHeart website  for more information about virtual sessions with her.

Freeing Yourself From A False Life And Claiming Your Soul Purpose: Conversations With Divine Mother About Global Collapse

Published on by Jelelle AwenLeave a comment

burning-heart

By Jillian Vriend

Jillian: Hello, Mother. The camp is quiet in the moment and I felt a desire to connect with you.

Divine Mother: I’m glad, Jillian. I feel a desire to connect with you as well.

J: I’m surprised that I’m not feeling more overwhelm and anxiety right now, considering that we are leaving in four days. Just four days and we’ll on our adventure to the States and then heading into Mexico in about a month. We’ve been planning this for what feels like forever and now it is finally happening.

DM: You’ve not just been planning, you’ve also been feeling. Feeling reactions of yourself and parts of you during this time of adjustment and transition. This is why you feel less overwhelm and anxiety.

J: I get that and, also, it just feels so right. I’ve never been so sure about anything in my life than I am that this is the right move for me and for those coming with me. It’s not so much about an absolute knowing as it is a feeling of being held and supported by you that makes it so clear and easier to navigate.

DM: For people who are not in surrender to Divine guidance, there is a feeling of uncertainty and lack of direction to their lives and the decisions that they make. They are in reaction rather than in response. Because you have been open to connect with me and, most importantly, accept guidance from me, you’ve been able to benefit from the clarity of purpose that brings.

J: That doesn’t mean that I don’t have moments of fear, anxiety, doubt, etc. Accepting guidance from you doesn’t shut down my feeling capacity, as you won’t allow it to be used to not feel.

DM: Yes. Rather than using ‘surrender to God’s will’ as a way to numb out with bliss or conviction or evangelical zeal, I offer the frequencies of my love with a complete respect for your sovereignty and an invitation to feel all the reactions that parts of you have to this love and guidance.

J: This is difficult to describe in words. I’m struggling to take what you are vibing to me right now and put it into words and concepts that people can understand.

DM: Don’t try to help them understand. Help them feel. Help them see. Help them heal.

J: Is that still my purpose here? It feels sometimes like I am just about practical matters and content-based living.

DM: Responding to practical matters has been important and it’s a grounded place in you that allows you to do that. You’ll need that to establish your gardens and shelters in your homestead and to remember many practical skills of survival that you’ve forgotten in this modern age. Yet, you are more than that too and your consciousness provides the context for the content.

J: I was reading last night a book by David Icke and he describes the sense that an awakened soul is aware that they are infinite awareness having a human experience. And that they are in the world but not of the world. That deeply resonated for me.

DM: Yes, and that can be a painful reality at times as most people are in the world and have mistakenly come to believe that they are also of the world. I believe that you call this being, “fused with content”.

J: Yes and with self identity supported by the false self and conditioning received from our birth family, society, friends, educational systems. Most people feel like slaves to me in a deep way. Slaves to content and to the medications and drugs they use to remain numb and asleep. Slaves to following the rules and conforming to others. Slaves to money and the contracts it binds them to and the meaningless jobs they undertake to keep it all going.

DM: The false self has imprisoned the heart, mind, soul, and body of most people. As you said, made slaves of them. Yet, ultimately, they are slave and master both. They hold the keys to their own freedom. All they have to do is see and feel how they are in a life that imprisons them, but that they are not of that life. They need to begin feeling the essence of their sacred humanity and the goodness of their human heart.

J: When we’ve told people about our plans to go to Mexico and live there off-grid in an eco-village, many people have expressed an envy at our ‘freedom’ to do this. As if we had some key or secret formula to liberate ourselves that they do not. And while it’s true that we’ve been blessed to get very good paint jobs lately that will fund our trip and buy our land, we’ve had to make very tough choices the last several years that have led to where we are today. And we’ve had to feel our way there, negotiating as we go. Letting go of all relationships that don’t serve our higher purpose and self. Letting go of most of our material possessions and, soon, letting go of modern conveniences to move into a more sustainable and off-grid lifestyle. So while it seems simple what we are doing, it has taken much emotional and spiritual healing to be able to do it. Much extracting ourselves from the false self world and the conditioning grip it holds on us.

DM: Yes! I’m glad to hear you declare that as it advocates for what others will need to do to become masters of their own authentic lives.

J: It seems rather hopeless, Mother, that many people will want to do this.

DM: They will be given ‘no choice’ in the matter with what is coming very soon. It will feel like no choice as circumstances ‘force’ them to give up their old life to embrace a new one.

J: I feel like many people would rather kill themselves than do that.

DM; That will be a likely outcome for many, yes.

J: Whew…that is heavy. I feel the heaviness of that in my heart.

DM: The contextual piece here is that every person that is alive on the planet earth during this time has chosen to be here during this time of great transition and death and rebirth. The questions for them to feel into that can provide a lifeline for them are: Why have I chosen to be here? What purpose do I have in being here? If they can feel why they are here and connect with a meaningful purpose, then whatever they are giving up of their old life will feel false in comparison. It is highly unlikely that their ultimate purpose is about ending their own life.

J: But maybe some people are just meant to not make it through what is coming. I have a fairly strong picture of what is coming with your support and I can barely stand holding it at times, wondering how I will bear it all.

DM: But you aren’t meant to bare it all, Jillian. This is the gift of foresight that I give to you because you have done the inner work to be awakened before there is ‘no choice.’ You will bear and witness what you are meant to with a trust that this is so.

J: Well, at times a trust and at times not so much.

DM: Of course, this will ebb and flow. For others who have foresight about the future and the very obvious consequences to unconscious actions that the human race has engaged with for many, many years…..for these people, they will have a sense of navigating the waves rather than being crushed by them.

J: Thank you, Mother, for the reminders about connecting with soul purpose as a means to navigate the coming changes. I’m going to go bake some oatmeal cookies now.

DM: Good, enjoy the simple things while holding the complex ones and you’ll be fine.

J: Thank you.

Jillian Vriend is co-creator of SoulFullHeart Way Of Life and currently on an exodus to an ecovillage in mexico. You can read more about connection with the Divine Mother in Jillian’s book, In The Arms Of Mother.

 

Exodus And Finding Sanctuary: Conversations With Divine Mother About Global Collapse

Published on by Jelelle AwenLeave a comment

burning-heart

By Jillian Vriend

Jillian: Hello, Mother. I felt that I wanted to journal with you again in public with so much shifting and changing in my life and in the world. It feels like things are happening fast now.

Divine Mother: Hello, Jillian. I welcome a public dialogue with you. As you know, I enjoy talking with you this way as it reaches your heart and has the potential to reach others. It doesn’t matter to me whether people reading this believe that it is me you are talking with. Only that the message goes into them.

J: What is the message you’d want them to take in, Mother?

DM: Well, it’s getting more urgent, isn’t it? The message is that time is running out on the false self created world of industry and unlimited growth. Time is false, yes, an idea created by the mind to hold hostage over arising reality. But, time in the sense of playouts coming in the immediate future is real. These playouts are consequences for a disconnected and wounded relationship that the human species has had with the earth, with animals, and with each other.

J: We are feeling a sense of collapse coming strongly this fall and winter. I wanted to go over some of the conditions that lead me to feel that way with you, but, also, I wanted you to offer guidance for people around what they can do and feel personally.

DM: Let’s start with what is happening right now and put it into a larger context together. There is much content available in your ‘news stories’, yet there is very little context to allow the heart and soul to digest it.

J: I guess the big one to me, besides ever looming climate change crisis, is the intensity of the wars that seem to be springing up at an increasing rate. I find that I don’t have a lot of energy to understand the facts behind the wars in the Ukraine or the Middle East, yet they feel out of control in a new way. Maybe I’m just so weary of ‘dropping bombs’ as a means to end war. More violence to end violence makes no heart sense to me.

DM: War is a manifestation of unhealed inner violence. It is the false self’s outed expression of an inner sense of powerlessness. This sense of powerlessness and unworthiness has led humans to resolve conflicts with increasingly sophisticated and devastating weapons. No one ‘wins’ in this scenario. Empires that have been built on the spilled blood of men and that need more blood to maintain them cannot be sustained.

J: Wow, that so goes in. The other increasingly alarming situation is the growing numbers of people dying from the ebola virus in western Africa. Our human history is full of virus epidemics although it is frightening to imagine one now.

DM: Viral bacterial are natural and nature’s way of maintaining balance. This is difficult to say and my heart strains as I say it, but the human population has expanded to numbers beyond what your planet can sustain. This has to be corrected in some way and, unfortunately, all the means of doing that lead to the deaths of many people.

J: That’s the aspect of collapse that is so hard to digest. I wish it could be different.

DM: Me too, my daughter. As you know, I have not interfered with the course of human evolution as it would have been going against your sovereign choice to do so. Yet for those who connect with me and surrender to my guidance, I offer them that death and rebirth are natural and inevitable cycles. I don’t offer protection from necessary death, yet I do offer comfort during the process.

J: There are other things happening too, yet I also wanted you to talk about what people can do in response to what is happening.

DM: There are two possibilities for people right now: immediate exodus to find sanctuary or create sanctuary out of where they already are. Sanctuary is a safe place where they can practice self reliance, ideally within a conscious community.

J: I feel self reliance has a practical aspect to it and an emotional and spiritual aspect to it. The practical aspect is about meeting for yourself, or within community, the four keys to human survival: food, water, shelter, and safety without reliance on the government to provide it for you and in balance with nature. Examples are growing your own food is an environmentally conscious way through permaculture practices. Finding natural drinking waters sources from fresh water springs or lakes. Creating shelters out of naturally sourced materials that meet your basic needs with minimal impact on the earth. Moving to less densely populated areas with opportunities for all four keys to human survival to be much more likely in a self reliant way. I wrote more about that here.

DM: Yes, these practical considerations are actually about going back to the roots of your species when your survival was held by the sovereign heart of each individual and you were more in touch with your animal nature and its impulses toward self reliance.

J: Going back to our tribal roots yet retaining the maturation of our egoic consciousness?

DM: Yes, exactly. The evolution of your egoic consciousness has been as natural as a seed growing into a plant. Yet, the egoic consciousness has also developed a falseness that to the degree it goes unconstructed leads to so many of the issues that your species has now and that we’ve been talking about.

J: I offered that there is an important emotional and spiritual aspect to self reliance. Deconstructing the false self and healing our emotional bodies is what I feel is the emotional aspect. And, you’ve already mentioned, surrender to and connection with you as the spiritual one.

DM: Deconstructing of the false self can happen to some degree by choice through the process you offer with SoulFullHeart and by other practices. It also happens when the construct falls away and the false self is ‘forced’ to give up the things it has become attached to.

J: I feel like that is a lot to digest for today, Mother. I look forward to connecting with you again soon. I feel that I need to and that others do as well.

DM: Yes, Jillian. I have more to say, of course, but I respect your need to breathe and digest. Until next time, my daughter.

J: Yes, until next time.

Jillian Vriend is co-creator of SoulFullHeart Way Of Life and currently planning an exodus to an ecovillage in mexico.

Related Writing:

60 Days With Divine Mother: Message Of Real Love From A Feminine God

Actions And Consequences: Conversations With Divine Mother About Global Collapse

Published on by Jelelle AwenLeave a comment

 

heartburn burning-heart

It is my compassion and deep love for humanity, for my human children as you said, that urges me to do what must be done even if it means the destruction of you all. I do not WANT that, Jillian. But my desires are secondary to the free will sovereignty that you have all been gifted with. And, many humans DO want to die and DO NOT feel the consequences of killing other species, each other, or the living planet. I feel compassion for these humans entangled in social and cultural conditioning and weighed down by emotional and spiritual wounding. But THEY do not feel compassion for anyone else, themselves, or the planet. And there are consequences for living in this non-living, non-loving, fear-based, unconscious state.

Jillian: Hello, Mother. I feel a sense of urgency on this rainy day in June.

Divine Mother: Hello, Jillian. Yes…I can feel that in you. Digesting what you’ve been reading and learning recently?

J: I feel like I have so much to ask you about related to the very real threats to the survival of the human species..yet I know you won’t give me reassurances, false hope, or specific timelines.

DM: Ask me what is in your heart to ask, Jillian, and I’ll respond with what I feel you need even if it isn’t what you think you want.

J: Mother….is the human race doomed? Are we looking at near term extinction in the next decade or even the next few years?

DM: I feel your tears and pain as you ask me that question, Jillian. I feel your despair and compassion.

J: As much as I can be frustrated by the actions and choices of unconscious people, I feel pain at the suffering and loss coming to us as a consequence for our short sighted and false self-based actions.

DM: So, you do feel there will be consequences?

J: How can there not be? That’s how the natural world works. Cause and effect. We have lived blindly so long to this basic principal…drugged by access to easy oil, easy food, easy water, easy shelter, easy life. Even as everything being easy has still made most people miserable.

DM: Cause and effect is the rule of nature. Yet as humans have removed themselves from nature by seeking to dominate it, they have delayed the consequences of their actions. Delayed, yet not ceased.

J: One of the consequences of our actions could be the end of our species.

DM: Yes. And up to 200 species are dying every day because of the actions of humans. Other species and the earth are bearing the brunt of the consequences of human action or inaction. Yet, nature seeks balance and it will find it.

J: It is difficult to imagine how that balance won’t mean adjusting the overpopulation of this planet by the reduction of many people. I feel your lack of sentimentality as we talk about this, Mother. I feel how much you love your human children, so why does your heart feel almost cold to me as we talk about this?

DM: This is my dark mother face, Jillian. The energy of doing what must be done even if it is painful in order to put things back in balance. The energy of tornadoes, storms, volcanoes. Even diseases. That which is out of balance must be righted again.

J: And yet I’ve experienced the compassion of your heart, the vastness of it, for several years now.

DM: It is my compassion and deep love for humanity, for my human children as you said, that urges me to do what must be done even if it means the destruction of you all. I do not WANT that, Jillian. But my desires are secondary to the free will sovereignty that you have all been gifted with. And, many humans DO want to die and DO NOT feel the consequences of killing other species, each other, or the living planet. I feel compassion for these humans entangled in social and cultural conditioning and weighed down by emotional and spiritual wounding. But THEY do not feel compassion for anyone else, themselves, or the planet. And there are consequences for living in this non-living, unconscious state.

J: I just feel like crying, Mother. I feel what you mean and I accept it but it just breaks my heart.

DM: As it breaks mine, Jillian. Sometimes we need to break our hearts open in order to truly let in and be with love.

J: And, I feel like I want guidance somehow around how to be with this heartbreak and what service looks like now for me and for SoulFullHeart. I feel the ash in the air, burning down of the structure that we created the last two years of sessions, space holding, group weekends, charging a fee for sessions…all of it feels like it is irrelevant compared to the very real possibilities of global collapse that we are feeling together.

DM: You created a form to contain the love and service that you had to offer others. The form is burning away, yes, in a necessary way. But the desire to serve love remains, yes?

J: Yes. I just don’t know the form yet.

DM: Form follows desire. Your desire is leading you to explore your world, to adventure to somewhere warmer and simplier in culture. Follow that and I will bring you connections, synchronicity…I will bring you opportunities to serve.

J: They just might not be in the way or structure that I am used to?

DM: Exactly. As you digest the ash in the air reality of your modern world, you are letting go of your attachments…the few that you had that is. This is the gift of ‘getting real’. Not for what it informs your mind, but for what it enlivens in your heart.

J: I so feel that gift even as it has been difficult to let in what we are facing as a species. Yet, my experience has been over the last ten years that ‘getting real’ is always preferable to deluding yourself, even if it hurts a lot at times.

DM: I feel the flame of your heart and soul being stripped of its form, Jillian, and therefore able to shine all the more brightly as a beacon to those ready to see it. I see it able to catalyze and penetrate more deeply what is authentic and vulnerable in others.

J: I think I feel what you mean, Mother. It’s what I want to be.

DM: And so it is what you are becoming. And it is the invitation from me to all my sacred human children….that their raw essence is one of love. Many of them have too much form, too many layers, to strip away this life and maybe will experience this in another life or even in another dimension where planets like Earth also exist.

J: What is the biggest thing that most people need to strip away, Mother?

DM: There are many answers to that question, Jillian. But I prefer first to ask rather than tell. What was the biggest thing you’ve had to strip away?

J: The first thing that comes to mind is to strip away the conditioning I’ve received. Social conditioning, family conditioning, relationship conditioning, western world conditioning, religious conditioning, mainstream psychology and spirituality conditioning, nutritional conditioning..and on and on. I’ve been in a process of deconstructing my mainstream conditioning and then experiencing what arises from my authentic essence instead to replace it. Lately, it’s been about stripping away conditioning related to unsustainable lifestyle choices.

DM: That is a major de-conditioning process, Jillian. It doesn’t feel like many souls signed up for that. But for those who did and feel an ache to experience how it feels when the authentic arises after deconstructing the false, then I would offer that the biggest stripping away would be of the denial and blocks that keep them from healing their own hearts and souls. Whatever conditioning they received that this was not important would need to be let go and a priority made of their own healing. And an urgent priority at that…

J: Yes, and this going inside ourselves eventually leads to a stripping away of social and relationship conditioning, which I feel is a huge block on the expression of our authenticity. For example, today is father’s day and it just about makes me choke to feel the congestion of duty, obligation, inauthenticity, and nonvulnerability that categorize most relationships that people have with their fathers. Yet, we all receive conditioning around this ‘holiday’ and feel a pressure to reach out or spend time with or appreciate our fathers. The same is true on mother’s day, birthdays, christmas, anniversaries. It is difficult to feel love on days such as these. Days that aren’t real anyway but been denoted as such mostly be greeting card companies. I have said no to most of this for years now.

DM: And so stripping away involves saying no to what most people hold as their reality.

J: A reality that is in general making most of them miserable and unhappy. A reality that creates a slave race out of humans because the conditioning we receive and pass on creates inauthentic actions and choices that lead to more emotional wounding. The conditioning creates toxic and dead relationships, especially marriages. I feel like the topic of dead marriages is a good one for another day though.

DM: Yes, that is fine. Jillian…..I just want you to feel that even during this time of great turning and death, it is being held with love. Death is necessary to free up love.

J: Even if there are no humans left to experience it?

DM: Yes. It is the most real thing there is and your world has been built on a false foundation of fear. My desire is for that foundation to crumble and maybe some of my human children will survive that crumbling. I do not know. But, what I do know is that love will survive. Even if it only exists in the future between the molecules of water and the sun or the blades of grass and the insect crawling on them.

J: Ok, deep breath…going to go digest this now and I do feel your love, Mother, and it does hold the heartbreak, even if it doesn’t alleviate it.

DM: Good, Jillian. Good to go feel now.

Jillian Vriend is co-creator of SoulFullHeart, parts work facilitator, author of a  book about connecting with the Divine Mother, on this blog, and sacred humanity-Divine Feminine teacher-student. 

Related Writing:

60 Days With Divine Mother: Message Of Real Love From A Feminine God

Moving From Denial To Conscious Choice: Conversations With Divine Mother About Global Collapse

Published on by Jelelle AwenLeave a comment

 

burning-heart

By Jillian Vriend

Feel your pain. Feel your desires. Let both lead you to take necessary actions as quickly as possible while still feeling yourself before, during, and after. Seek out resources, such as what you are offering with SoulFullHeart, that can help you make this transition. Do not be fooled by denial’s message that you have all the time in the world. Wake up to your pain and your desire and let it lead you to claim your life and your sacred humanity.

Jillian: Hello Mother, I haven’t talked with you in a while, at least here in public.

Divine Mother: No and I’ve missed it, Jillian.

J: Me too. What have you missed?

DM: There is an intimacy and an immediacy to this medium for me that I enjoy very much. This is why I feel that the internet is the great equalizer and connector…until the technology behind it collapses, that is.

J: That’s what was in my heart to talk to you about today, Mother. I have been feeling quite strongly for a few years now how we are currently in a phase of the collapse of the systems that the false self has created: economic, political, social, religious, environmental, etc. These systems were necessary and yet, also, they need to collapse to rebirth a new way that is based on authenticity, love, and the sacred human self.

DM: Well said, Jillian. You feel conceptually and contextually in a beautiful way that can be of service to those who want it. Many souls are waking up to the reality of the collapses that are happening in so many areas, especially those who have already been personally impacted by them. It is easy to get overly immersed in content though….researching WHAT is happening to the cost of not feeling WHY it is happening.

J: I think many people feel why it is happening yet don’t recognize the false self aspect of themselves or that the development of the false self has been a necessary phase of evolution in the human species, as you have offered to us. As a reference, you and I talked about the false self development in this post if people want to read it.

DM: As you and Wayne offered in your talk to others about this topic a few weeks ago, denial is the fuel of the false self to keep the current systems in place.

J: Yes, we feel that denial has a strong currency in the world and that it is used to obscure the ‘facts’ from being presented, to slow practical action from being taken, to numb feelings of unhappiness that would lead to authentic desire expressing. We feel that it comes from the wounded sense of a separate self. A self that feels separate from you, from others, from an authentic core inside needs denial to keep its current world intact. We felt there are four main areas of denial shaping the world that we live in: military/industrial/economic which denies the integrated self; religious structures which deny our sacred humanity and birthright to experience direct connection with the Divine; the New Age love and light picture that denies death as a path to rebirth; and our birth family and social conditioning which deny our true emotional needs and authentic expression.

DM: That is a wonderful delineation of denial, Jillian. And what would you offer is the path to heal denial into awakening consciousness?

J: We offer through SoulFullHeart that connecting with parts of ourselves or subpersonalities in an emotionally conscious way leads to awakening in all areas of our lives. This is an internal process, yet it changes how we see and feel the external world. Also, healing our soul wounds that block connection to Divine source through connecting with our Daemon or soul guardian consciousness allows us to feel our sacred humanity as a reflection of being your children. In SoulFullHeart, we offer a path of de-conditioning from birth family and social conditioning that arises out of connecting with parts of ourselves and feeling what they advocate for in terms of connection or taking space. And, SoulFullHeart offers that it is feeling our pain and embracing our shadow, accepting the natural cycles of death and letting go that allow for rebirth.

DM: When you are in denial of a necessary change or death, you can only be a victim to it when it inevitably happens. If you can feel and then choose, that makes all the difference in how you experience the change.

J: Can you say more?

DM: When you ‘let something happen to you’ you are dis-empowered and all you can do is respond. Sometimes, this is the necessary and surrendered path. However, many people live from this default state at all times. They are in denial of and resistant to the changes that they NEED to make in their lives and so they can only experience changes that happen as traumatic and not digestable because of it. They can eventually accept and adapt to these changes, yet it is very different to make these changes from a conscious place that is feeling all there is to feel before, during, and after.

J: This is what we feel the sacred human self can do as it is differentiated from the false self and other parts. It can make the space for this digestion and choosing process.

DM: Yes, which is what you are currently holding as you digest and choose to move to Mexico in October.

J: I would describe my digestion process around that since we first felt the call to do it a few weeks ago as an up and down, ebb and flow process. There have been moments of real excitement and anticipation then moments of fear and anxiety contraction. The contractions don’t stop the momentum around practical planning for the trip, but I do make space to feel what is going on rather than powering through them. I don’t deny that they are there.

DM: This is an important point. If you make the conscious choice to make a change, then you can hold and respond to it – similar to the way a pregnant woman responds and holds both the positive and difficult changes that are happening in her body as the baby grows inside of her. The pregnant woman knows that something is dying (her previous life before she had children or her body as it was before it was pregnant) and yet also that something will be born out of the dying. This is the process of labor: the contractions that cause pain produce life.

J: I would say the human species is going through more dying than birth labor right now. As Wayne says, it really feels like a hospice phase. Or as part of my Daemon named Dys would say, ‘It is an ash in the air time.’

DM: Ash in the air, yes. And toxins in the water. And poisons in the food. It is a great phase of dying of that which can no longer be sustained.

J: I feel the heaviness of this time we are in, Mother. I feel this deep sense of death and loss that is coming. It is hanging over me at all times even as I feel joy in the moment. It actually brings more poignancy to the moment to feel what is coming, similar to how some dying people feel about their lives after they receive their diagnosis.

DM: Continue to feel the heaviness and the joy both, Jillian. There is sacredness in both. Sacredness to the process of death, labor, and birthing. You are living in a highly sacred time.

J: And a highly scary one.

DM: Yes, it can be scary for parts of you to feel the changes coming. Yet, as you said, feeling this fear and not denying it is the key. Can you imagine how much power and love would be accessible if world leaders could just say, “I am afraid” and feel and share their fears rather than unfeelingly ordering yet another wave of drone strikes or ground troop attacks?

J: Wow, yes, I feel how powerful that would be. The fears that they are trying so hard to deny by taking violent actions would be able to be surfaced and felt which would actually give them access to more authentic power inside of them. I imagine that their choices would be much different. One thing that I feel fear about is that the men who we placed authority on to have their fingers on the buttons that lead to mass destruction make decisions from their unfelt fears, pain, and congestion. These are the people that we declare our leaders in a time such as this?

DM: They are a reflection of the systems that they are going to help collapse. Those with awakened heart and soul consciousness will be called upon to lead and serve when the great birth labor phase arises out of the ashes. Yes, people like you and Wayne.

J: It has been difficult for our message to be received now, before this collapse. It’s like we are invisible in a big way and what we are trying to bring can’t penetrate the layers of denial.

DM: Yes, that is an aspect of what you are experiencing. And you have the next phase of your own journey to undertake that will draw those who are in resonance.

J: That’s what it feels like to me. Mother, I wanted to ask you: What would you guide someone to do who feels the collapses that are happening?

DM: Feel your pain. Feel your desires. Let both lead you to take necessary actions as quickly as possible while still feeling yourself before, during, and after. Seek out resources, such as what you are offering with SoulFullHeart, that can help you make this transition. Do not be fooled by denial’s message that you have all the time in the world. Wake up to your pain and your desire and let it lead you to claim your life and your sacred humanity.

J: Thank you, Mother. I think we’ll complete on that note for today.

DM: Yes, ok, feels as if we have more conversations to have about this in public, yes?

J: Yes, I was feeling that too and I am very open to that. Just as Wayne is open to Yeshua’s guidance and connection during this phase of transition for us and the world.

DM: Good. I look forward to that.

Jillian Vriend is co-creator of SoulFullHeart, parts work facilitator, author of a  book about connecting with the Divine Mother and on this blog, and sacred humanity-Divine Feminine teacher. 

Related Writing:

60 Days With Divine Mother: Message Of Real Love From A Feminine God

Conversation With Divine Mother: Feeling Our Emotional Needs Underneath Our Frustration

Published on by Jelelle AwenLeave a comment

divine_feminine2

I invite you to feel that, next time you are frustrated: feel what emotional need is not getting met for you and to ask for support.

Jillian: Hello, Mother. It’s been awhile since we’ve talked publically, since my last blog entry in my 60 Days With Divine Mother series.

Divine Mother: Hello, Jillian. Yes, it has been a little while, even though time is not real and I am always with you. I am with you now as I was with you yesterday.

J: Yesterday was a rough day for me and for parts of me. It was a day where it felt like I “woke up on the wrong side of the bed.” Huge waves of frustration and irritation. Disconnect and discontent. This is rare for me and I wanted to check in with you about it.

DM: Why did you decide to do this publically?

J: I was reading over some of my previous conversations with you and I was touched by the love flow between us and I missed your energy and presence. It has been harder to feel since we stopped connecting publically almost every day and I wanted it again.

DM: And, to share transparently and publically what a ‘rough’ day feels like for you and how I respond to it?

J: Yes, that’s right. You are ever the teacher, even as you are the student too.

DM: Learning and teaching go heart and heart, not just hand in hand. What would you like me to feel with you, my daughter?

J: It feels like much of the feeling has passed since yesterday after sharing with Kathleen at dinner and also Wayne and I clearing between us. It just felt like part of me was annoyed and irritated with everything around me and also with the small space in the RV that we now live in. She felt suppressed and contained by the small space. She felt rage that life has brought us to this ‘reduced place.’ Even as my experience has been that it doesn’t feel reduced at all, but opened out.

DM: Well, this part has her own emotional reality and I feel why she would feel that way. Would she like to talk with me directly?

J: She says, “ok.” It’s Jill, my inner teenager and healing matriarch part.

DM: Yes, Jill. I am here.

Jill: Hello, Mother. I’ve missed you. I feel tears coming up in the moment as I feel how I’ve missed you.

DM: Does it feel like I haven’t been there?

Jill: I guess, it’s just with not connecting every day like we were, I have felt like you weren’t there. I’m sorry. I should know that you are always there.

DM: Ah, Jill, please don’t apologize for missing me and for not feeling me there. And there aren’t any ‘shoulds’ in my world, sweet one. What was the source of your frustrations yesterday?

Jill: I still don’t know. It reminded me of being in high school and just having ‘foul’ days where everything and everyone annoyed me. I felt that way yesterday. I was fucking tired of living in such a small space. Of sleeping, eating, and writing all in the same bed! I was tired of the cold that we’ve been getting over and not being able to exercise for the last four days. Ah, Mother, I feel like a brat just sharing this with you. With all of the world’s problems and all the people suffering, I sound like a spoiled brat!

DM: Please don’t judge yourself harshly, Jill. Your feelings of frustration were real and comparing your fortune to others to invalidate them blocks me from being able to feel the deeper reasons and source for your frustration. Do you remember what I’ve offered the feeling of frustration is really about?

Jill: I think you’ve said that frustration is an expression of unmet desire and emotional needs. And, sometimes, it is a very reasonable reaction to have, a passionate reaction to injustice, for example. But that wasn’t the case yesterday!

DM: Hmmm, well, maybe not, but what if an unmet desire or emotional need was the root of your frustration?

Jill: I guess that would be a desire for more connection and service with others…our interactions with others have increased recently and it seems like new people might be drawn to and open to SoulFullHeart. I feel a desire for that.

DM: I can feel your desire, yet, it feels deeper than that. Is there an emotional need that hasn’t been getting met for you?

Jill: Well, I can feel a need getting met just in talking with and connecting with you. I can feel your Motherly presence holding me and giving Jillian more heart and energy too. I felt overwhelmed yesterday by what felt like “a lot to do” even though it was mostly cooking, which I like to do. I didn’t feel held by anything bigger yesterday and that I had to do it all, without Wayne’s support either.

DM: So you had an emotional need to feel supported in what you were responding to and doing?

Jill: Yes, that’s it. And I asked for support from Wayne and in journaling with Jillian but I didn’t really let them in when they offered it to me. I didn’t feel like I could trust them really. And the irritation and frustration felt just like what I grew up with as both of my parents tended to have parts that had a low level of irritation brewing at all times, just waiting to explode.

DM: You are moving through a parental piece, Jill. Perhaps getting ready to let in Jillian even more and me as well? Maybe even become a bit younger?

Jill: Oh, well, now that’s a better way to frame it then I was just being a brat.

DM: Jill, your emotional needs largely didn’t get met during your childhood. Your frustration and irritation are a result of that and of absorbing the undigested tones of that from your parents. And they are innocent in another way because they had the same experience with their parents. I invite you to feel that, next time you are frustrated: feel what emotional need is not getting met for you and to ask for support to feel that from Jillian and from me if you want to.

Jill: Ok, Mother, that gives me some power around what is happening. I felt like I was drowning in the irritation yesterday. That gives me a lifeline.

DM: Yes….a heart line.: ) Also, it is not ‘bratty’ to feel that your emotional needs aren’t getting met or that you aren’t satisfied with what you are experiencing. If there is entitlement there, Jillian can help you sort that one out.

Jill: That is so new to the conditioning that most of us receive about our emotional needs, Mother. Very new.

DM: Yes, and I appreciate that you were open to sharing your struggle publically so that I could offer this to others.

Jill: It was so worth it to feel your heart, Mother. Thank you.

DM: You are welcome, dear one. Any time…truly.

Jillian Vriend is co-creator of SoulFullHeart, parts work facilitator, author of a  book and on this blog, and sacred humanity-Divine Feminine teacher. For more information about the SoulFullHeart Way Of Life, visit soulfullheart.com.