Tag: divine feminine

Healing False Mother To Let In Divine Mother: Women’s Group Call July 5

Published on by Jelelle Awen2 Comments

By Jelelle Awen

When I shared on social media previously about my upcoming women’s group call tomorrow where we will be feeling into healing the Motherhood wound/False Mother to let in Divine Mother, a question came up around, ‘who is the false mother?’ Exploring the answers to this question is where we will go within the call space….as it is truly unique to each woman and her Metasoul experience/lineage as well.

In general, the False Mother is any projections/archetype/’lineage’ and legacy/birth family line and other lifetimes experiences/karma that block and limit access to experiencing and letting in the energies of the Divine Mother. False Mother can show up in ‘presentations’ and packages of Divine Mother that are used in strategic and dogmatic ways, such as in religions, some spiritual practices, and even in New Age offerings. These energies can have a warrior energy to them, be seductive or overly pious, and fused to other lifetime archetypal expressions such as Priestess/Witch/Sorceress/Shaman.


False Mother usually feels impersonal, transcendent, non-relational, even punitive/punishing in frequency. False Mother can show up even in Goddess worshipping practices in which you tune into and even ‘obey’ the “Will of the Goddess.” False Mother is also something you are looking to on the ‘outside’ rather than experiencing from the inside in deepening ways.


These False Mother energies are actually usually coming from the lower 4D wounded/unhealed masculine energies and the AI Matrix. A Matrix is actually a womb yet the 3D/4D control Matrix has been about programming, conditioning and conformity and distorting light/love into a false version in order to keep many souls ‘stuck’ at a certain tier of consciousness. In a way, the Matrix has also been a False Mother to parts of us and soul aspects as well.


As the Matrix continues to collapse and the wounded masculine heals, there is more opportunity to connect with the pure and authentic energies of Divine Mother. The False Mother frequencies become revealed from within (such as those expressing in your Inner Mother), in relationships (with birth family feminine caregivers and in your Matriarchal family line), and in your Metasoul experiences.
As you identify, feel, and heal these false mother frequencies, you then experience the REAL Divine Mother of PURE unconditional love, compassion, authenticity, range of expression (from still to fiery as needed…..from deeply compassionate to unsentimental, etc.), passion, and template for embodiment within your sacred feminine human body.


You feel then the Divine Mother within YOU and come that much more into embodying Her AS you. As Divine Mother has told me so many times, “I am you and you are ME. Now, let THAT in!”


We will explore this more tomorrow in my monthly women’s group call over Zoom at 10:00am PDT through teachings/sharings with me, a guided meditation to connect to your Inner Mother/False Mother within through a bridge with Divine Mother, and personal sharings for those women who would like to. We will tune into the loving sisterhood circle created during the call to generate more of the Divine Mother energy.


You can attend and/or receive the recording by whatever donation you feel to give via soulfullheart.org/shop or paypal.me/jelelleawen. More info at soulfullheart.org/womensgroupcalls and https://www.facebook.com/events/425536431663247/


You can purchase the recording of any of my previous women’s calls where we explored Healing the Sisterhood Wound, bridging to Divine Mother (two calls), Sacred Feminine healing, healing the inner masculine and more at the same links as above.


I also recommend my new book Free To Be 5D, where I describe much more about the False God/Mother/Light Matrix and how it expresses and the SoulFullHeart process to heal from it: soulfullheart.org/books

The Gift Of Feeling Pain &Trauma

Published on by Deva yasminLeave a comment

By Deva Yasmin

There are so many ways I can see, of how parts of me can push beyond feeling pain in order to attain or achieve certain experiences. The spiritual search for a long time was a search for a place free of pain for me, the attainment of bliss states and higher consciousness feeling so much more superior and desirable, than acknowledging the pain and suffering parts of me were experiencing. I still see it playing out for parts of me, especially as we taste more of the bliss, joy and contentment that is arising, they desire to stay there, but as Embodied Divine Humans, that is not our purpose to remain there it feels like.

The thing is these states are actually arising, from me being willing to acknowledge, feel and listen to the pain and trauma my parts have experienced, not from any pushing away of, or striving towards, a particular state, this actually blocks bliss. It feels like the reason I can experience these more joyful feelings is because, as I deeply know the experience of the opposite, I can appreciate the true simplicity of what joy truly is. This is a constant circling between the both for me and my parts, there is no end place and yet there is a place of experiencing more and more goodness coming in, only as I am willing to let go of what is not loving or bringing feeling of goodness.

This is the cost it feels like, to experience the fullness of who we are, and what this life and universe has to offer us as Divine Humans. Through feeling the pain and trauma, I am liberating parts of me from the prisons and Matrices they have learnt to call home, but to leave the only home they have known is painful too. To leave behind what they felt was nurturing, loving and resonant for so long, to go towards the more that I feel is available, brings up so much for them to digest. To realize how much of what they felt was Love, has actually been toxic and kept them inside the prison walls, is painful, tender, vulnerable and raw.

There is a time, and a self loving paced, organic-ness to being ready to soberly look into the reality of the life that was known for so long. As parts are felt and validated in what they have experienced; first by others in sessions, which then templates how we can valid ourselves, more space opens inside of us. As I am deepen in this process, I experience how this space becomes available for higher dimensional aspects of myself, as well as Divine beings to come in and support my continued exploration with my parts.

The ones we have been longing for, the parts of us who have the higher wisdom we have been seeking for, and the Beings of Love who we have been calling for, for so long, forgetting how close they have always been, come in to us. It feels like our commitment to keep showing up for ourselves, is a beacon, as we become more attuned to feeling, we become more sensitive to the higher frequencies all around us. This for me is so much more embodied, which brings a visceral confirmation of what is real and the Love that is always here.

When I have pushed to attain a certain state, the higher frequencies can feel ‘floaty’ or ‘wishy-washy’, they cannot ground and actually be beneficial in my everyday life. My parts cannot let it deeply in, in the ways that is needed for them to feel, heal and integrate their past experiences. They cannot rest within me if they cannot FEEL, the stable presence of the safety these higher frequencies and Divine Beings are offering them, especially I feel Divine Mother. She feels so significant to my parts process right now, as I digest with parts of me who have never felt held or nurtured.

It feels like if we keep pushing beyond pain as it is arising, not being sensitive to the subtle contractions, we keep ourselves in the prison of feeling alone and in pain, we keep ourselves in the suffering loops. As I write this, I feel how I am learning to be really present to the subtleties of all this, this no longer has to be a process of digging and trying to unearth pain or trauma, the pain arises organically in response to just BEing in life, being available to the healing life is offering us in every moment. As there is more and more goodness arising, it can be quite the process as well to let that in, I feel many of us who have been on this journey for a while will resonate with the striving and pushing for healing, or the over focusing on what is wrong, it can feel quite addictive to parts who are so used to the frequencies of abuse and trauma, to want to stay there it feels like.

I feel I am entering into more of a space of flow with the process, and an availability for what is real in the moment, letting life and what is in my heart lead my process. This feels to me what it means to be embodied. Parts of me no longer want to get out of the body to find home, or out of feeling pain, because they are realizing more and more from experience, that their true home, their higher frequency origins and their Divine nature activates and arises from within, as they feel and clear the pain and trauma they have held onto for so long, because that is what has felt like home.

The empty space that is opening up within me and within my life, through my willingness to feel pain and no longer hold onto places, people & patterns in my life that cause more pain, can feel both completely full of potential and completely void. So many questions, and so much time to explore them, so much to digest, and so much clarity to be birthed in me too, A space of feeling, healing and becoming.

I find myself in the moment honoring a very tender process with my younger parts as they let go of relationships that have been abusive and toxic, non of this is easy, but it is real and honest, and that is what my Soul longs for. This is what my woman’s heart longs for, and as my parts learn to trust me, and they experience the beauty and goodness living life lead from a tender, vulnerable, open heart brings, feeling pain becomes SO worth it and SO valuable, as it becomes the Inner Compass guiding us home, always, to LOVE.

Much Love,

Deva x

Deva Yasmin is a SoulFullHeart Collaborator & Facilitant. Visit https://www.soulfullheartwayoflife.com for more information about space holding sessions, group calls, videos, community, etc

 

Physical/Emotional Pain Relief & Ascension Chakra Clearing Guided Meditation: Video Six Deepen 2020 Series W/Jelelle Awen

Published on by Jelelle AwenLeave a comment

In this sixth video of my video series called Deepen 2020, I (Jelelle Awen, SoulFullHeart Teacher/Facilitator) talk about the reboot process that is going on a multidimensional level and bringing up physical and emotional body pain for many of us. I offer that this pain is a portal that can open up access to multidimensional places and access to trauma as well that needs healing, such as I offered in my last video connecting you to your Reptilian Self to using head/neck/shoulder pain as a portal to them: https://youtu.be/pA7ZjZj2K8M

The other phase of reboot of the 3D/4D Matrix relates to the wounded masculine energies within our collective and personal souls and emotional bodies and the love forgiveness energies they can receive with the Divine Feminine. I write more about that here: https://soulfullheartblog.com/2020/01/28/energy-update-wounded-masculine-matrix-reboots-as-divine-feminine-energies-arise/

I’m hopeful that the guided meditation provided in this video will offer some immediate pain relief to your emotional and/or physical bodies as we focus white light on those areas. We are then joined by Yeshua Christ and Mother Mary, who provide Divine Masculine and Feminine energies of support to us as we move through our Personal Sun and Soul Star Chakras. We then bring the codes/energies from these chakras down through the crown, causal, and main chakras to ground in Gaia. Connecting with these Ascension chakras can be helpful to alleviation of pain symptoms as more Ascension energies can integrate and digest.

Thank you for joining me in this video….as we move into Deepening energies together…..one beloved part of us at a time!

You can watch each video in the Deepen 2020 playlist on my SoulFullHeart Experience YouTube Channel here: https://www.youtube.com/playlist?list=PLNmrHdaQSAvLjwm17eBBTRhE3dbezYJdu

You can watch videos from my previous 33 Day Deepen series from 2019 here: https://www.youtube.com/playlist?list=PLNmrHdaQSAvLiLpw1qSOmQE-tsqhGSAD3

Money donations are so appreciated and received with gratitude as an energy exchange to support me and SoulFullHeart to continue providing free offerings such as this video series. You can donate through paypal: paypal.me/jelelleawen or become a one-time or regular patreon donor: https://www.patreon.com/soulfullheart

This video series serves as an introduction and bridge to the powerful SoulFullHeart quantum healing process and cutting-edge way of life experienced and offered through 1:1 sessions with Jelelle for women and women and men with Raphael Awen and group calls/events/writings and more. For more information, visit https://www.soulfullheartwayoflife.com.

Energy Update: Wounded Masculine Matrix Reboots As Divine Feminine Energies Arise

Published on by Jelelle Awen2 Comments

By Jelelle Awen

Energy Update: Reboots ongoing as we move into completion of only the first month of this catalytic 2020 year! These reboots seem to be allowing for ‘offline’ moments of access beyond the control Matrix at 3D and Lower 4D levels to those soul aspects/fragments of us that are ready to unplug. I wrote and shared about the rebooting of the Lower 4D/AI Matrix as connected to our Reptilian selves and the mutual liberation available for those that were ready to heal and release from the programming here and here.

This reboot seems to bring up head/neck/shoulder/jaw pain and discomfort as the causal chakra (radiating from the back of the head/upper spine area) comes ‘online’ and awakens then encounters the plugs and helmets, etc. that are still plugged in on the 4D level to the Matrix. People have shared with me many positive, inspiring, and surprising experiences as they connected to and unplugged their Reptilian Aspect through this teaching and guided meditation, which creates a bridge of compassionate love and ambassadorship to this energy within your soul who often needs it most and is usually bleeding through the strongest through to your body/life experience:

The other layer of rebooting going on is related to the wounded masculine/patriarchal frequencies of the 3D/Lower 4D Matrices. This rebooting is pushing up densities of trauma to be felt and loved on the physical/emotional/energy body levels. You may be feeling this is in sudden and strong waves of outrage, hurt/mourning/grief, and desire to speak your long suppressed truth ‘to’ the patriarchy rumpling from your soul. The densities moving through the body can particularly impact the womb space area for women, shifting and intensifying or delaying our menstrual cycles and hormone levels, and blocking sexual desire flow with distrust of the masculine.

Felt from the soul higher level, the dominance and prevalence of the patriarchal energies since the fall of Atlantis/Lemuria has been a key element of keeping the Matrix in place. Suppression of the Divine Feminine and the powerfully catalytic and passionate energies of feminine intuition, heart-based feeling, and unity consciousness awareness that She brings forth has been needed for us to immerse more deeply into this 3D experiment into the more polarized frequencies of our separation choice from the Divine.

Yet, as so many of us have felt for years now, it is time for the Divine Feminine to arise again! It is time for Her energies to soothe, comfort, and offer forgiveness to the wounded masculine and show and remind him of the necessary role that he played in the bigger picture. In the heart of the Divine Mother, he is and has always been forgiven. Receiving this love allows the masculine to remember who they are in their bigness, their strength, and, most especially, in their kindness.

The Divine Feminine within us can arise as we connect lovingly and compassionately to our own wounded masculine within….in the form of our Inner Protector, Inner Punisher, even our Inner Mothers can hold this energy of wounded masculine as a legacy and family line passed down to them. This rebooting highlights and illuminates the polarization between your INNER masculine and feminine and their relationship to each other. Here are guided meditations with me to meet these parts of yourself: https://www.youtube.com/playlist?list=PLNmrHdaQSAvLiLpw1qSOmQE-tsqhGSAD3

Resting and holding space for parts of you can help in the transition during these reboots. Minimizing taking in 3D density if possible such as choosing high frequency foods as fuel or even fasting; limiting social interactions; not pushing work or to-dos; spending time alone in meditation and in nature. I’ll be releasing a guided meditation soon as part of my Deepen 2020 series for alleviation of Ascension body symptoms during these reboots with the Divine Mother.

These reboots in the Matrix are opening up new opportunities to lift your own veil, discover the programming that exists in your own soul, and connect to the Divine Feminine within you again! She waits for you in these cosmic and collective openings….eager to respond to your need, soothe your fear, and alight your Cosmic Christ-Magdalene consciousness within your human body!

~

1:1 powerful, quantum healing sessions to open access to your own soul’s guidance, wisdom, and code activations just waiting for you are available with me for women and for men and women with Raphael. More information here: soulfullheartwayoflife.com/sessions

Love,

Jelelle Awen

Jelelle Awen is Co-Creator/Teacher/Group Facilitator/Ambassador of SoulFullHeart Way Of Life, a healing process and paradigm offering New Gaia Ascension frequencies to transmute trauma into love on emotional/spiritual/physical levels. For more information about  1:1 individual sessions with her for women and with other SoulFullHeart Facilitators, virtual group calls, writings/books, and videos, visit soulfullheartwayoflife.com.

 

 

 

Connection To Divine Mother Energies Post-SOULstice: Women’s Group Call on Sunday, December 29

Published on by Jelelle AwenLeave a comment

By Jelelle Awen

These SOUlstice energies invite us into stillness….to explore the inner worlds of our heart and souls, to explore our own darkness and the magic that lives in the shadows, to heal the pains that loop and lead to suffering. Our devoted and constant guide, teacher, and companion in this inner journey is the Divine Mother – in Her many shapes and forms.

The energies of Divine Mother are available especially now during these transition times of cycles ending, years completing, and seasons shifting.

I invite you to join me for a women’s group call over Zoom (my last one for this decade!) a week from today, Sunday, December 29th at 10:00am PDT for two hours to connect to these beautiful and support and VERY personal Divine Mother energies through teachings, a guided meditation/channeling, and sharings with me.

It is a rich experience that offers a template for us as women in our ongoing journey to explore what sacred femininity actually IS in a culture that has so long suppressed her.

You can join us live or receive the recording for $15 CAD. You can purchase it here via our shop: https://www.soulfullheartwayoflife.com/…/4-sacred-feminine-…

Or via paypal: paypal.me/jelelleawen

More information here about the call: https://www.facebook.com/events/1009206646096138/

and here: soulfullheartwayoflife.com/womensgroupcalls

Here are some testimonials from the last women’s group call!

“Deepest gratitude for the gifts shared in our Women’s Call today! This call is now part of a growing experience of togetherness and sisterhood – TO BE TAKEN IN MANY TIMES, ANYTIME. If you did not have a chance to participate, I would strongly recommend that you take in the recording – As all that we experience, the energy of this one is alive! Incredibly rich to all my parts! Much gratitude for the beautiful shift that it allowed for me today! Namaste!” Isabela Gasparini, 12/1 group participant

“I feel so much gratitude and Love. These calls are so healing and revealing so much as is this whole process. So glad I am here. I wanted to express deep appreciation for the shares too”. Deva, 12/1 Group participant

“Such a wonderful call and I feel so grateful to have finally been able to attend one of these women’s calls! The meditation and teaching was so moving and epic, each face of mother feeling so important for each aspect of me and my life. The sharings were beautiful and vulnerable as well, so real in what was true for each person’s process. Can’t wait for the next one!” Raianna Shai, 12/1 Group participant

Love,
Jelelle Awen

 

 

Connect With Divine Mother Energies: Women’s Group Call W/Jelelle Awen (Dec. 1st)

Published on by Jelelle Awen1 Comment
By Jelelle Awen
One my deepest joys over the last years in service has been to connect and bridge women and parts of them to experience the heart and love of the Divine Mother. It is my great and humble honor to provide this bridge, as they develop and cultivate their own connection more and more to Her as well by feeling the parts of them that may resist it. This connection to Her offers compassion and forgiveness to heal the feelings of being judged, not being worthy and wrong. Connection to Her offers loving support to heal the feelings of not being seen and the pain of not being initiated into our soul purpose expression. Connection with Her provides heart courage and soul strength to heal the fear of change, the unknown and the death/rebirth process….and SO MUCH more.
 
It is still, to this day, the Divine Mother’s energies that hold me, support me, guide me, and teach me as I continue in my process of embodying Her in whatever deepening ways that I can in the moment. It is the best and most comforting feeling for me to feel myself as Her daughter, Her sister, and Her student…I get to lean into that without being diminished in any way.
 
It is Her template that reminds us of what it is to an authentic feminine. Her template activates the Divine spark within us to express that more and more AS ourselves.
 
I would love to share Her energy transmission with you during my next Sacred Arising Feminine Exploration women’s group a week from today at 10:00am PDT over Zoom. I’ll share more about my journey with Her, which began nearly 15 years ago now (and is being explored in many different lifetimes/timelines too) and also provide a guided meditation for you to connect with different faces/energies of Her to see what resonates for your soul.
 
There is more information here: https://www.facebook.com/events/474843500044699/
 
You can attend live or receive the recording for $15 CAD ($11 USD) by purchasing it here: https://www.soulfullheartwayoflife.com/product-page/3-sacred-feminine-exploration-women-s-group-call-jelelle-awen
 
Or you can purchase it here through paypal: paypal.me/jelelleawen
and we will send you the zoom link via email.
 
Love,
Jelelle Awen
soulfullheartwayoflife.com/womensgroupcalls

Exploring Inner Masculine & Feminine Relationship – Women’s Group Call Today Or Receive Recording W/Jelelle Awen

Published on by Jelelle Awen1 Comment
By Jelelle Awen
Still time to join us for our Sacred Feminine Arising exploration women’s group call over Zoom at 10:00am PDT (Vancouver time today)! As always, the content and exploration is becoming clearer to me as I am getting ready for it. I am going to focus on the relationship between our inner masculine (as women) and how that relates to the arising (or not) of our inner feminine essence. Much of even what can seem ‘feminine’ is actually a masculinized feminine or warrior, matriarchal or non-vulnerable Priestess energy.
I’m going to share about my years-long journey in healing parts of my Inner Masculine and especially working with my Gatekeeper aspect for many years until he ‘ascended’ to a higher frequency some years ago now. I will talk about the different types of inner masculine/feminine relationship dynamics that I have seen over the years in myself and those women I have held space for as well. I will then lead you into a guided meditation to meet/connect with your Inner Masculine in relationship to your Inner Feminine to deepen the connection and association there.
If you can’t join us live, you are welcome to receive the recording afterwards as well. More info here: https://www.facebook.com/events/939184226480490/
You can join us by offering a $15 CAD ($11 USD) donation by purchasing here: https://www.soulfullheartwayoflife.com/product-page/sacred-feminine-exploration-women-s-group-calls-jelelle-kalayna
Or via paypal here and I will send you the zoom link: paypal.me/jelelleawen
Love,
Jelelle Awen

Surrogacy W/Kuan Yin Offers Compassion, Forgiveness, And Stillness

Published on by Jelelle Awen2 Comments

By Jelelle Awen

For the last month, I have been experiencing a surrogacy with Kuan Yin (or Quan Yin), an aspect of the Divine Mother that holds a non-dualistic space and bodhisattva energy. A surrogacy with the Divine Mother is a visceral, daily connection space for a phase of time where you are letting in the specific tones that She is offering through whatever ‘form’ of Her that you will be most responsive to in the moment.
 
Kuan Yin is a beloved teacher for me, yet She is also a mirror for me. Her repeated mantra to me is often, “I am you and you are me.” This is an invitation to move beyond comparison, beyond feeling that I am ‘less’ than Her, beyond separation and into Unity. It also serves as a reminder that I am a Divine Spark in human form (as we ALL are.)
 
This latest round of surrogacy began as I started fasting and wanted to bring more prana/chi/life force energy into my body. I showed up in Kuan Yin’s etheric space, which is a beautiful oriental garden temple in the mountains of Japan. Kuan Yin connected me to a helpful mantra of “OM” (on the inhale) and “Ma” (on the exhale), which allows my mind and body to fill up with prana and then release it into my own energy field and the space around me. Om Ma is letting in the Divine in its Universal Form and exhaling Divine Mother’s expression.
 
I have also been connecting with a Metasoul aspect of mine named Lau, who is a disciple of Kuan Yin’s. As I have calibrated to the soft, gentle, delicate, and still nature of both Kuan Yin and Lau, tears have come up in moments. The tears have been about a mourning for a soft and compassionate feminine energy that I did not have or know with my own birth mother. There has also been hurt coming up for Lau in her relationship with her mother in her timeline that mirrors mine around not being seen for my soul gifts, my Divine presence, or my essence by my birth mother nor any of these gifts watered or initiated in me by her.
 
What I experienced of the feminine (as true for so many of us) was a matriarchal energy from my birth family line that had tones of control, manipulation, fear, and anxiety in it. There was little stillness, little love transacting, yet rather much frenetic energy that ‘filled the space’ and left no room for the authentic feminine to arise.
 
Over many years of processing this reality with parts of myself and having a very necessary phase of no contact with my birth mother, much of this wounding has healed. A healing that has been deep enough to allow a genuine flow of love and compassion from my heart to other women, especially those I serve in session space.
 
Yet, also this love transacts between me and my own daughter Raianna Shai at a rich and meaningful way, free from the angst, competition and controlling energies that I experienced as a daughter. When I started my healing journey many years ago, I knew that I could not authentically serve the arising of the sacred feminine in others nor be the kind of mother I wanted to be if I did not focus deeply and with complete intention on healing the difficult and painful experience I had myself this life and other lifetimes with the wounded feminine.
 
Kuan Yin’s energy offers a template for a feminine that is still, that is oriented first to BEing, that can feel the cries of the world without becoming them. I am so grateful for the Divine Mother and the many faces of Her that have been such a loving balm to all the parts of me that have needed them. And, it is Her energy that overflows to others in service of love so often when parts of them most need to feel forgiving, nurturing, and non-judgemental energies.
 
Kuan Yin reminds us that we are deeply loved for our essence….always and in all ways. We are Her and She is us.

~

Here is a guided meditation to connect with Kuan Yin and other faces of Divine Mother with Kalayna and me: 

 

I am also offering a new women’s group starting on Sunday, September 29th at 10:00am PDT over zoom for women over 18. I am honored to dive into the depths of sacred arising feminine exploration based on my experiences in my own process and serving other women for over 15 years. I am sure that Kuan Yin and other faces of Divine Mother will be joining us to hold the space for this sacred work! There is more information here if you’d like to join me live or to receive the recording for a $15 CAD donation: https://www.facebook.com/events/933962383622792/

or here; https://www.soulfullheartwayoflife.com/womengroupcalls

 Love, Jelelle Awen

Soulfullheartwayoflife.com
Jelelle Awen is Co-Creator/Teacher/Group Facilitator/Ambassador of SoulFullHeart Way Of Life, a healing process and paradigm offering New Gaia Ascension frequencies to transmute trauma into love on emotional/spiritual/physical levels. For more information about 1:1 individual sessions with SoulFullHeart Facilitators, virtual group transmissions, four day gatherings in Victoria, BC, writings/books, and videos, visit soulfullheartwayoflife.com.

Energy Update: Full ‘Harvest’ Moon Supports Recovery/Moving On Process

Published on by Kalayna Solais1 Comment

by Kalayna Solais

Energy update: DEEP tears last night before going to bed… Felt so fully held in the arms of the Divine, especially Divine Mother, bringing more waves of them to feel and help clear the cluttered heart. Tears of purging and detoxing, rebirth and renewal, they were. Body shaking, quaking, sobbing. This is the state I so willingly went to as I returned last night to my tenderness, femininity, woman’s heart after an intense journey interfacing with this new life phase that seems to be opening up wider this week… and had my masculine activated in a more defensive or protective way than a way that lets my femininity BE and be vulnerable and breathe more too.

Today’s Full Moon is bringing something to full illumination inside. Sometimes these moons bring these tides of tears that aren’t always about pain but simply about rising again for yourself, to yourself. Sometimes parts of us get so backed up in our busyness throughout our work weeks, explorations of connections with others (especially any new connections where parts will likely feel especially self-conscious and reactive), that once the more feminine space within can be accessed, they can burst open again like a broken water pipe, sharing everything they’ve been feeling this whole time, and the Divine is there holding the bucket that catches it all.

Friday the 13th energies feel like a wrap-up and renewal opportunity that also comes with the Full Moon energies bringing pieces to full circle. It’s definitely a time of rebooting. Of completing one phase and beginning another, even just internally. It could be a time for you of ‘harvest’ as this is the Harvest Moon, which brings in energies of encouragement and support to feel who you truly ARE right now after the journey you’ve been on so far.

In all of this deep feeling release that’s possible right now, there is an opportunity to continue to move on, to move UP in frequency and upgrade your desires for more love in all areas of your life too, especially within, because without that harvest, that cultivation of deepening inner love, the deepest and most healing movements cannot be what they most need to be.

Raphael and Jelelle Awen will be co-hosting a very powerful group transmission over Zoom tomorrow. I highly recommend checking it out, especially as a way to explore deeper what could be moving for you now. More info here: https://www.facebook.com/events/1340021326164133/

***

Kalayna Solais is a SoulFullHeart Facilitator for women, energy healer, soul scribe, and poetess.  Visit https://www.soulfullheartwayoflife.com for more information about space holding sessions, group calls, videos, community, etc.

Balancing Light Activations With Love For Ongoing Digestion And Integration

Published on by Jelelle Awen2 Comments

By Jelelle Awen

You may be seeking MORE light, more activations, more awakening and altering experiences from and with others. For moments, these activations feel GOOD. These activations remind you of your soul essence AS light. 

These experiences jolt and bolt. They vibrate and activate. Their energy is of the churning and burning kind. 

There can be a kind of ‘mode’ in this activation seeking. The mode looks like finding the next thing to join and belong to. The next thing to ‘take’ that will heighten and lift. The next thing that will spark the fire that will light up existence to feel more worthwhile. It is like the thrill seeker wanting ever greater heights to fling themselves off of. 

The afterglow of these profound activations can be temporary. They last as long as the retreat/seminary/workshop/session lasts. They are somehow ‘outside of your life’; they are also, somehow, outside of your body. And, usually, outside of your heart. 

So often there is cost to your well BEing afterwards. There can be intense symptoms felt in the body of this over saturation of activations. There can be undigested traumas that have been pushed up from the lifetimes where this light was called in and then used in an abusive way toward others or yourself. There can be acute frustration for parts of you about WHY the suffering and pain continues in your life even after intense activating experiences…….as if they are in the aftermath of these experiences, rather than being healed and transmuted by them. 

The NEW and NEXT invitation for our Ascension into our sacred humanity is for the focus to be on the digestion of all these activations, not just the seeking out for more of them. It is for us to be aware of how important the INtegration of these light codes IS to our ongoing sense of well being.

Integration happens as LOVE comes in. Love allows for the light to digest into every cell. Love allows for the light to integrate into daily life. Love makes the space for the feeling and healing of the traumas previously in the shadows that also get pushed up by so much light. 

Love comes from the heart and womb of the Feminine and the embracing energy of the Divine Mother. Love is provided by Her compassion, her forgiveness, her NURTURING, her acceptance of wherever you are in your awakening process and journey.

Embodiment (or ‘in-the-body-meant’ as I recently saw it wonderfully called) is about the balance of the light and of the feminine. The balance creates a fireplace so that there isn’t harm as the fire of light sparks up, yet provides place for it to bake into MORE revelations of love. This balance becomes possible as the Protector/Gatekeeper aspects of your soul can be negotiated with to allow more love to come into your BEing. 

Your Gatekeeper aspect may have learned to distrust love in favor of the light even as they resist the light too in some ways. The Gatekeeper may feel that love has been scarce, whereas light has been more bountiful. The feelings of this part of you can often connect very directly to the wound of your mother experience from this life and other lifetimes as well. They connect to the original pain of separation from the Divine during this life and other lifetime incarnations and, therefore, feelings of being ‘kicked out of’ and dispelled from the Divine Feminine womb space.

I wrote more here about healing from the original separation wound from the Divine to return to wholeness: https://soulfullheartblog.com/2019/06/27/healing-from-divine-separation-3d-experience-to-return-to-wholeness/

You may recognize and resonate with what I am offering here as an up/down indigestion experience that you are repeating for yourself in your awakening journey. To cultivate a space from within that can hold and digest and integrate the light WITH love is what we are being invited to BEcome. A balance of the Divine Feminine and Divine masculine aspects of your being that doesn’t sacrifice your well being for enlightenment (even and esp. to serve others).

The Divine wants us to experience this balance, where joy/magic/alchemy are sustaining in EVERY moment for us. And, we are experiencing the increasing sense that we ARE the light of love finding its way home inside every cell of our very human bodies.

Here is a guided meditation to connect with your Gatekeeper aspect, who allows access to other lifetime/timelines and also seems to regulate flow of light/love into your BEing: 

Jelelle Awen is Co-Creator/Teacher/Facilitator/Ambassador of SoulFullHeart Way Of Life, a healing process and paradigm offering New Gaia Ascension frequencies to transmute trauma into love on emotional/spiritual/physical levels. For more information about 1:1 individual sessions and group transmissions events with her and other SoulFullHeart Facilitators, writings/books, and videos, visit soulfullheartwayoflife.com.

Photo by Artem Kovalev on Unsplash