1:11 begins this post. Nice timing. It is a gateway into a new emerging relationship inside myself (and yourself) that has been in pregnant pause. I have been connecting with my Gatekeeper on a more consistent basis to bring him more into the room of my daily consciousness. He has been very effusive most of my process yet has had played games of peek-a-boo off and on. He is moving from a guardian of my soul story and gifts to a beloved partner and guide on this journey of inner healing and discovery.
(For more information on how we hold what a Gatekeeper is you can read this article: http://www.soulfullheartwayoflife.com/gatekeeper)
I found him stuck in the shadowland territory of my soul and through SoulFullHeart energy work and guided meditation brought him into closer proximity to the light of my heart where he could ‘dethaw’ from the experience. As we have connected, he has guided me to a couple of metasoul brothers in other timelines that are connected to Kalayna’s metasoul (my sacred union beloved). He was just with me in those moments being a witness to my connection with them to help heal old frequencies and dynamics in our bond together.
But as those faded and are waiting for further deepening and clarity there has been a struggle within him to feel like he actually has purpose and clarities. Everything seemed like a blurry painting sometimes. Static in the air that was creating doubt. Of course underneath doubt lies a deep fear of actually having what it is you deeply want for fear of it going away.
In the shadowlands, he was held by a Reptilian energy. It had created an open portal into my world through him. Noel, my Gatekeeper was connected to this Reptilian aspect that actually lies within us all. There was a felt sense that Noel needed to meet this Reptilian self, named Salthazar, to help heal the bind that still seemed to connect them and release them both from the downward spiral of the shadowland.
It was an amazing experience to feel this once timid and elusive guide of mine stand in the bowels of this intense energy and hold a loving space of compassion and service of love. He could feel this Reptilian’s truest heart and the source of its wounding. There was a forgiveness and an invitation to feel a new timeline for this part of me. It was quite and extraordinary process of transformation as he went from snarky pot shots to authentic tears even while in reservation that a new life awaits him.
He offered him a new family within my inner court of wayward travelers, kings, and guides. It was like being in the most captivating movie I could ever imagine. Within this BEing is a Lizard King. He held so much of my punishment, judgement, shame, fear, and control. Holding the light amidst the most unsavory within us all is what moves the darkness and births out a new gift that was never thought possible from the fear place.
There is still work to be done. Pain to be felt and trust to be garnered. But it is the first step into a series of other steps that brings new possibilities and new energy to an unending journey of what it means to be alive in this Now….moons, holidays, solstices and all.
The healing that is offered in SoulFullHeart is a doorway into an infinite world of discovery that begins with our 3D anchors and moves us into these epic and storied landscapes of our 4D consciousness that hold the seed of our Star Being connection. Each movement and step is a deeply felt and celebrated event that brings new awareness of what our sacred humanity ready to illuminate.
Gabriel Heartman is an emoto-spiritual men’s and women’s facilitator, energy healer, writer, poet, and heartist with the SoulFullHeart Way of Life. Visit https://www.soulfullheartwayoflife.com for more information about space holding sessions, group calls, videos, community, etc.
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