Sometimes Real Love Can Feel Like A Bully

Real love presses and invites with compassionate passion. It wants more of Itself to shine and be shown. When it feels that it is being hidden away, defended, or downplayed, Love goes for the cracks. The places that it can sneak under to find more of Itself to heal and flourish.

To the part of us that takes a defensive stance to being “infiltrated” in the name of self-preservation, it is just wanting what is known to stay in stasis because it is all it has ever known…even if this is suffering or crisis. So if love is advocating for itself, which lies on the other side of those walls, then Love would feel like a bully to this defended part of us.

This can only feel true if there is a bully inside that provokes that response. An experience of being punished or persecuted, either this life or others, creates a knee-jerk protective stance toward anything that feels encroaching our inner sanctum of vulnerability. 

“Tough love” comes to mind when I ponder this more. Tough love has an edge to it that can be an inner punisher part of one person that is using this term as an excuse to off-gas abusive energy. There may be a true loving intention, but this energy can be tainted with some toxicity. If there is an experience of this within a spiritual or psychological framework, your Protector most certainly can have some reaction when Real Love is being offered. 

What is the difference? 

It comes down to feeling your own inner bully dynamic and how that may be being projected out and even drawing these situations. It is also about being vulnerable with the feeling of being bullied that draws out this inner energy. There is a sorting out that takes place to parcel out what is “tough” and what is “real”. Real love can be intense and may be tough to a part of us, but it is never toxic or rough. It does not pry or demand, but invites and passionately advocates. 

In any authentic and safe healing space, the healer must also be in tune with their own emotional and spiritual bodies and be willing to feel and see their own “stuff” that may be a part of any advocacy or difficult love offering. This allows the protective part of the one receiving healing and guidance to feel safe and open. 

This is why those of us in SoulFullHeart are always asking ourselves, and each other, if where we are coming from has tinges of an energy that may feel “off” so that we can feel how that may be affecting our facilitation. As a community, it is a system of checks and balances that is about our own personal growth as well as our commitment to being the most authentic healing modality out there. 

If you have experienced this wound of toxic love, my heart goes out to you. I am sorry that happened. I want to invite that part of you to experience something different and possible. Something genuine and real. Something that leads you to experience a new relationship to the pain and trauma, with transparency, honesty, and heart-open advocacy.

******

Gabriel Heartman is an emoto-spiritual men’s and women’s facilitator, energy healer, writer, poet, and heartist with the SoulFullHeart Way of Life.  Visit https://www.soulfullheartwayoflife.com for more information about space holding sessions, group calls, videos, community, etc. 

Visit our website to offer a money donation to support our offerings at https://www.soulfullheartwayoflife/donations.

Advertisements

Increasing Light Exposing The Dark Knight: Response To Mass Shootings

Somehow this is becoming a tragic reality of the unfolding drama within a country. Within humanity. After two back-to-back shootings on the heals of another just days earlier, it becomes clearer that a country is on a verge. I say a country because the US leads the world in these types of events. The mass shooting. The most numbers in one incident happened in Norway, but the volume of incidents and deaths happen in the US. 

It is also by the hands of men. Young men who all had deep emotional issues prior to the event. They have been described as outside the bounds of intimate community with a deep feeling of rejection and disenfranchisement. Yes, they are mostly white, and many have used their own hate as the fuel for their actions. The hate has been both indiscriminate and specific. We are all affected. 

I get that there is a war going on. It is undeniable to me. It is going on in the heart and soul of a populace of men. This saddens me deeply. It has edges of despair and hopelessness at times. These men have faced their own experience with violence and feeling unloved. When a part of them feels rejected, either by an individual or a group, this part needs to find a way to get its power back. It is a dark knight that seeks the throne of attention in any way it can, and being steeped in violence it has the means already at hand. 

This is a Violence Matrix. One that permeates the heart and soul of the wounded masculine. This aspect of men is permeable to influence in order to feel power. They can become pawns in a much larger game going on. They can create useful distractions and reactions that lead toward a specific goal. It is a soul history of being a soldier for The Cause. A 4D matrix that has deep roots. This is where the healing is if we can get there. The one great effect we have as men is to go into this and find out where that wound lives. That disempowerment, that rage, that violence. 

We all have our reactions to this from despair to indignation. When this happens the Rage of Change comes out loud and clear, but until we learn to love our own Dark Knight the cycle seems to keep recurring. As Gaia continues to enter more and more of the photonic light belt, we are going to see increased exposure of what lies deep within our collective shadow. These men are us. If we disconnect from them, we disconnect from a deeply wounded part of us seeking Love. We disconnect from a soul brother that is still in war and in battle. Fighting for his continued right to hate himself above all else. This brings me to tears. This brings me to wanting to love him and give him a home. No gun control legislation can heal this, even if it can stem it. 

We are being given the opportunity to feel something deeper. This is what Disclosure is offering us. It is not pretty. It is not overly welcome. But it is real and we need to face it. Otherwise, the wheel goes around one more time.

*****

Gabriel Solais is an emoto-spiritual men’s and women’s facilitator, energy healer, writer, poet, and heartist with the SoulFullHeart Way of Life.  Visit https://www.soulfullheartwayoflife.com for more information about space holding sessions, group calls, videos, community, etc. Visit our website to offer a money donation to support our offerings at https://www.soulfullheartwayoflife/donations.

 

Lion’s Gate Energy To Activate And Empower The Inner Masculine

This upcoming Lion’s Gate feels like a very activating and empowering portal. We are being offered the support to go in and access where we are still recapitulating dynamics and patterns in our emotional body and Metasoul. These cycles are looking to complete with love and compassion and reemerge into new cycles of higher manifestations and empowered, self-loving choices.

The inner masculine provides the ‘juice’ for this transition transmission. It creates the container by which the healing and emerging can deepen. If you feel like there a block to manifesting or moving into your next phase of growth, there is a part of you that has a resistance to that.

It can be a Protector/Gatekeeper that knows what is possible if that container is created. It means you have the ways and means to get even more intimate with yourself and your shadow. It also means that you have more to ‘lose’ if you are successful at the manifestation of what it is you truly want.

With each portal we are being shown what it is we need to go into to further this ascension process. Subconsciously we have some clue and THAT is what scares us. Going in it is what brings us to the other side, but do we have just enough worth to bring the unworth with us and see what happens?

This is a great time to feel what it is you really want out of life. Put in your Christmas list now as the Universe, and our Sirian aspects, want to give it to us! It is all right here for each of us to grab. Santa’s bag is an Infinite well of goodies! This is where it can feel too good to be true for many parts and aspects of you anchored in the unworth and scarcity.

Tapping into your Sirian guides, your inner masculine/feminine, inner child/teenager, and Protector/Gatekeeper can help bring clarity to what has kept you from fully inhabiting and claiming what it is you really want and believe you can be.

*****

Gabriel Solais is an emoto-spiritual men’s and women’s facilitator, energy healer, writer, poet, and heartist with the SoulFullHeart Way of Life.  Visit https://www.soulfullheartwayoflife.com for more information about space holding sessions, group calls, videos, community, etc. 

Visit our website to offer a money donation to support our offerings at https://www.soulfullheartwayoflife/donations.

Lion’s Gate Portal Gathering Momentum For NEW Timeline Activations

By Kalayna Solais

Here I am, at the beginning of one of my busiest weeks in a long, long time.

Yesterday was a digestion of that and anticipation of it too… mingled with more layers of grief and letting go as Gabriel moved on to his new place yesterday after two months of processing through our separation. There is definitely a bittersweetness in the air and in my heart and soul and parts too as I continue to move on from what was to embrace what’s here and what’s emerging this week especially as it’s all NEW timeline and a lot to let in.

This busyness I’m speaking of seems to be not just a busyness on the outside but I feel it too in my soul and heart.

I feel parts of me moving and shaking, quaking a bit at all that there is to show up for in service this week while my soul is SO excited by the evidence of everything I’ve been moving through that is bringing in the opportunities to serve.

There’s a feeling too that my Metasoul Aspects who I call my “sisters” (haven’t met any “brothers” yet, but I’m open to that!) are readying themselves to help out too. Together we are working to get the inner spaces spruced up for the arrival of the new… new souls to serve and hold, new hearts to connect with, even an additional 3D job experience to dive into and see even WHY I’m drawn to it and it has drawn me.

There’s SO much to trust in this ongoing momentum. I feel that not only for me but for the collective too. I feel it for every one of you reading this as you’re likely experiencing something of this in your own way… some momentum brought in by this Lion’s Gate Portal that is shaking things up inside, which can be uncomfortable at times yet it’s all good and there are ways to be with your parts as they feel their reactions to letting in the NEW and letting go of what once was.

You are a beacon lighting UP. You will be finding it more and more difficult to ‘hide’ who you are. Parts of you that are afraid of that, especially your Inner Protector who has worked so diligently to keep your soul purpose and/or parts of you hidden, could be especially up and activated right now. The world needs you even as you continue your healing inside, for it’s your vulnerability and realness that sometimes serves more powerfully than any attainment.

Here is a guided meditation to help you connect with your Inner Protector:

Much love! ❤

~

The photo is of my new altar I’ve just set up! Bringing in and honouring this new wave of service and the support I feel from the Divine as I continue to step into it.

If you’re feeling the desire for a session, my beloveds and I would love to serve you in your explorations of your own NEW timeline possibilities and the continual letting go of the old… soulfullheartwayoflife.com/sessions

***

Kalayna Solais is a SoulFullHeart Facilitator for women, energy healer, soul scribe, and poetess.  Visit https://www.soulfullheartwayoflife.com for more information about space holding sessions, group calls, videos, community, etc. Visit our Patreon page to offer a money donation to support our offerings at https://www.patreon.com/soulfullheart.

Why Healing Your Inner Child Is A Key Aspect Of Ascension

By Jelelle Awen

Your Inner Child is not just the woundedness, shyness, hurt and shame that they so often feel. These are the emotional energies this part of you has experienced in 3D life from traumatic experiences that didn’t get digested when they needed to be….in the exact moment that the trauma occurred. So the energy of trauma gets stuck, like a clogged drain, stuck in the ‘moments’ they were wounded. If there had been an open-hearted/open-souled caregiver to digest the trauma, your Inner Child would remain in much higher and natural frequencies of love and soul essence and innocence.

Instead, it is so often our caregivers who CAUSE the trauma and who repeat the abuse that they experienced too with their caregivers. They are innocent in this (in a way) as they don’t know any other way to BE yet (esp. if the caregivers/parents have not awakened their soul frequencies to realize the patterns and choices here.) It is a cycle of undigested trauma passed down like a legacy of woundedness through birth family lines that often has very little consciousness about the harm that is occurring.

Your Inner Child absorbed these wounded frequencies like a sponge. In their heart and soul porosity, they could only become, to some degree, these pains and aches. Yet, there IS an essence there of love and light that is preserved and stored of your Inner Child due to the dutiful work of your Inner Protector and other parts that form to guard/protect and serve through the 3D journey (and into 4D as you awaken.)

I was am so often reminded during sessions with people of the actual MACIAL essence potential of the Inner Child. In a recent session, instead of finding a hurt and wounded energy, my client/facilitant discovered her Inner Child as a magical BEing of alchemy able to transmute the ‘dark corners’ of her essence into love again. Her Inner Child had experienced some healing of traumas through previous emotional work and was ready to reveal herself as the magic that she IS. She just needed a bridge to her energy in order to show her true colors again.

Also, we were connecting consciously with her Protector in the session, who came along with us on this journey to connect with the Inner Child. This allowed the Protector to be negotiated with and not block the love from coming through, which can often happen in Inner Child ‘work’ if the Protector is not consciously acknowledged. The Protector’s filter of the Inner Child is that they need fierce guarding, that they are helpless. The Protector often seesYOU as your Inner Child (not as a powerful, creator BEing, grown and mature adult.) Much of the suffering loops that occur of inner punishment/judgement and the corresponding shame reaction are unhealed frequencies between the Protector (and Inner Punisher) and the Inner Child.

Our Inner Child transmutes from 3D wounded sad/shame/hurt frequencies into 4D magical joy/achelmy, your Star Seed Child, and eventually into 5D Crystal Child frequencies as we love and hold space for them. It is these Crystal Child frequencies that actually power our Merkabahs or light body vehicles for multidimensional travel. The Crystal Child frequencies in us allow for the necessary fuels of curiosity and reverence to power our Merkabahs into the multidimensional realms that we most need to go in order to reactivate our DNA, connect to our galactic family, and heal/integrate our soul fragments in other lifetimes.

Connecting with your Inner Child links very directly with your Ascension and Awakening process. It is a KEY aspect of the process. Trying to avoid or divert or bypass from healing the Inner Child doesn’t seem to work very well and shows up in other ways, such as abuse patterns in relationships, ongoing suffering, body disease/illness, cap/blocks in ascension, etc.

The Inner Child is a crucial energy to ‘come along’ with you on your journey! Invite them into your heart space and discover the rich and vast rewards of this INtegration! There are so many gifts freed up as you integrate these energies back into your BEing again and realize that ALL of what you experienced as a child (no matter how painful or traumatic) can actually be transmuted back into love AGAIN if you respond to it with love.

We offer very direct, effective, and powerful ways to connect with your Inner Child and all parts that need you (including those soul fragments (metasoul aspects) in other timelines. 1:1 bridging sessions with me and SoulFullHeart Faciltators Raphael Awen, Gabriel Heartman, and Kalayna Colibri are available! Visit soulfullheartwayoflife.com/sessions for more information.

Here is a guided meditation to connect with your Inner Child:

Jelelle Awen
Soulfullheartwayoflife.com

Jelelle Awen is Co-Creator/Teacher/Facilitator/Ambassador of SoulFullHeart Way Of Life, a healing process and paradigm offering New Gaia Ascension frequencies to transmute trauma into love on emotional/spiritual/physical levels. For more information about 1:1 individual sessions with her and other SoulFullHeart Facilitators, virtual group transmissions, four day gatherings in Victoria, BC, writings/books, and videos, visit soulfullheartwayoflife.com.

Of Love And Limitations: Freedom Is In The Healing

There were many times in my life I just wanted to feel Free. Free to say what I wanted. Free to do what I wanted. Free to have what I wanted.

Yet I couldn’t feel this so-called “freedom”. I only felt ‘limited’. Which eventually turned into ‘imprisoned’. I turned that outward as the fault of my situational circumstances, of capitalism, the Powers That Be, and then eventually the totality of the 3rd Dimension.

Then as I turned my gaze inward I saw the warden WAS me. I was the one that created this reality that validated this imprisonment. This containment. I was choosing stasis, not death and rebirth. It’s not that I was dying, it was that parts of me were just too damn afraid to live!

There are still times I feel this lack of freedom. I know in my essence it is an illusion. A construct. A protection. A veil. It is there for a reason. A message. A place to go to heal and expand the gates a bit more.

You see, I have learned that we all have this limitation. We were gifted with it so that we could learn about ourselves. Learn about what Love can truly do. What it is capable of in the most horrendous of circumstances. That feels a bit insane to a part of me but when you experience that moment when Love finds its way into the Dark, it somehow all makes the most unimaginable sense.

It just IS. Right there waiting for us to let go of the trauma and the fear of what it means to be the Greatness Of Being Divine that we ARE. The power of love is so intense that we need this limitation so that we take it in like the most beautiful sunset ever-imagined after a very long night.

This is the process of our healing and our opening. One part, one soul aspect, one galactic being at a time.

*****

Gabriel Solais is an emoto-spiritual men’s and women’s facilitator, energy healer, writer, poet, and heartist with the SoulFullHeart Way of Life.  Visit https://www.soulfullheartwayoflife.com for more information about space holding sessions, group calls, videos, community, etc.

Visit our website to offer a money donation to support our offerings at https://www.soulfullheartwayoflife/donations.

The 4th Dimensional Grand Reorganizing

Each day our Mother Earth ship takes us perilously into the Light of the Next. It is not so much the New as we have been there before. We are There Now. It is just New to the current consciousness of our 3D conditioning and protection.

Why do I say ‘perilous’?

Because to this part of us, it is so. It is being lovingly and compassionately dismantled in order to let in all that we have been dreaming of and have known to Be outside of our 3D perspective. The reactions to this can show up in a myriad of ways from physical, emotional, and spiritual conditions.

All that this transitioning consciousness used to see as real and abiding, are coming into question and many times in very painful and confusing ways. There is a 4th Dimensional Grand Reorganizing underway and that can trigger a whole list of existential and traumatic feelings.

This is a time to love this part of you deeply. To hold space for its sacred death and rebirth process. It is not a time for fighting. It is a time for feeling. You are in transition. Be kind to yourself. Give yourself all the love and support you can find both within and from others that are on and have been on the same journey. Resonance is the life blood of the new family bond.

*****

Gabriel Solais is an emoto-spiritual men’s and women’s facilitator, energy healer, writer, poet, and heartist with the SoulFullHeart Way of Life.  Visit https://www.soulfullheartwayoflife.com for more information about space holding sessions, group calls, videos, community, etc.

Visit our website to offer a money donation to support our offerings at https://www.soulfullheartwayoflife/donations.

The Need For Belonging, Forgiveness, And Acceptance At The Root Of Our Collective Pain

“We are not just the Light but the shadow that it casts as well. We are all looking to find love and be felt in all the pains that we have experienced. We all seek forgiveness and to be forgiven. We need to feel a part of something and to be told we are beautiful just the way we are.”

I watched a documentary last night called Jihad where the documentarian Deeyah Khan interviews different muslim men in the UK that were led to extremist Islamic groups by a particular man who fought in the war in Afghanistan against the Soviets. This former leader, known as the founding father of the Western jihad movement was interviewed as well.

Deeyah Khan’s focus was to get to the heart of the man of whom she was interviewing to understand what it truly was that led them to this extremism underneath the politics. It was a riveting and touching account of our humanity and our deep desire and NEED to feel like we belong and are accepted.

Now this is a VERY rough and tumble lower 4D energy that is hard to feel, YET for me it got to the core of something intensely profound in our collective. It has roots in our veiled perception of separation and how we have experiences that have left parts of us all feeling very alone and deemed unlovable. What Inner Protectors do to assuage that pain range from benign to extremely destructive, either toward self or others.

It is easy for this parts to get sucked into the vat of polarized politics. Even in the New Age movement there is “spiritual warfare”. This is polarized spirituality with deep roots in our own personal traumas and pains. If we were to be like this interviewer and sit down with our parts that are feeling rage, trauma, fear, angst, or frustration we can get to the deeper and more vulnerable pain that undergirds this polarization.

When this was brought with compassionate curiosity, the leader of this jihad group found himself in a flood of tears that cut to the core of his pain. His innocence and humanity were left on the table and Love was finding its way. I felt similar frequencies in my Orion self when going into the myriad timelines of galactic destruction.

The most provocative part of it was when she asked this leader, after stating that he had forgiven the people that had killed his family as a child, if had forgiven himself. This was the most powerful moment as he still had not gotten to that point and the tears and pain flooded in once more.

This act of self-forgiveness is where the road to true self-love and change begin. It is where the dreams of what is desired and possible are permitted to flourish and gain traction. When these men were asked what they wanted for themselves, each one of them could not answer. They had not thought about it their entire lives. Coming from my experience that left me sad and yet hopeful that they would find their own personal heaven within.

Watching this film brought an expanded awareness of where my humanity and spirituality meet. We are not just the Light but the shadow that it casts as well. We are all looking to find love and be felt in all the pains that we have experienced. We all seek forgiveness and to be forgiven. We need to feel a part of something and to be told we are beautiful just the way we are.

*****

Gabriel Solais is an emoto-spiritual men’s and women’s facilitator, energy healer, writer, poet, and heartist with the SoulFullHeart Way of Life.  Visit https://www.soulfullheartwayoflife.com for more information about space holding sessions, group calls, videos, community, etc. Visit our website to offer a money donation to support our offerings at https://www.soulfullheartwayoflife/donations.

 

A Man’s Journey To Self Through Feeling His Relationship To His Mother

A man’s relationship to and with his mother has such a big influence in his relationship to women, the feminine (internally and externally), and his ability to let in the kind of love he yearns for. It also has an impact on his individuation as a man in the process of maturation and ascension.

As a man, this relationship has deep roots not just in this life but in our soul. So much of our wounding can be projected onto our mothers, as well as onto other women because of our relationship to our mothers. Unearthing these roots and entanglements takes a man into a sacred journey of finding his truth and his own inner feminine energy.

It makes it very difficult to feel that when in a wounded relationship to mom. This can come in the form of of the Inner Protector, Inner Teenager, the Inner Child, as well as our Inner Mother/Father. There is a natural and necessary phase when a man needs to unachor from his mother to find the depths of its wound and authentic transactability.

At some point, the Divine Mother replaces the deeper need a man has in his soul and a new, conscious relationship can arise between mother and son if each are doing their work. This more vulnerable and authentic relationship can inspire and inform a sacred romance with a woman that is not based in the recapitulation of this wounded mother-son wounding.

On this Day of Mother, I feel a desire to hold all men accountable to their authentic and conscious relationship to their mothers, the feminine, and the Divine Mother of all. Only then can real and true growth happen in the heart, the genitals, and the soul.

*****

Gabriel Solais is an emoto-spiritual men’s and women’s facilitator, energy healer, writer, poet, and heartist with the SoulFullHeart Way of Life.  Visit https://www.soulfullheartwayoflife.com for more information about space holding sessions, group calls, videos, community, etc.

Visit our website to offer a money donation to support our offerings at https://www.soulfullheartwayoflife/donations.

The Need For Discernment AND Connection In Spiritual Healing

BS detectors are on High…but so is the desire for community, resonance, and support.

This is the message I got last night after Kalayna and I held our second in-person group meditation circle here in Victoria. It was an intimate gathering of hearts and souls that expressed their desire for deeper connection and context. While the focus of the meditation was the ascension chakras, we couldn’t also help to bring in the heart as the center point for any and all explorations.

This inevitably leads to the protective and defended layer that lives and breathes in all of us to one degree or another. The Inner Protector, individually and collectively, feels to have a very focused BS detector. They will not be lead into disingenuous territory not matter the “qualifications” of said organizer or leader.

This is probably the most important aspect of this work. The deep desire to serve must be precluded by the deep desire to see and heal the shadow. It is not shadow hunting as much as it is being aware or being brought mirrors of any energy that may feel out of alignment with the sanctity of genuine, compassionate service and leadership. In other words, light work is shadow work.

The deepest reflections and validations we can get from others are the ones that come from those who have this detector/protector on High. Now the detector could be turned on so high that nothing is able to get in and that has its own process.

When I talked about this last night there was a resounding collective nod that showed me that this is a big thing is the greater collective. It was a sign from the Divine to keep bringing the vulnerability and the realness to the table so that Love has a chance to be seen and served from within and in service of others.

We got very warm and genuine appreciation for the held space and the grounded heart-centered energy. It was a new level of service for us both and we felt a glow of joy that we got to bring our passion and love to others who were in need. Our own reflection and service of Love is why we are here.

If you are feeling a need for similar grounded and heart-open space to explore and heal through some deep layers, we are available for one-on-one bridging sessions. Your BS detector is honored and deeply needed in this quest for connection and support.

*****

Gabriel Solais is an emoto-spiritual men’s and women’s facilitator, energy healer, writer, poet, and heartist with the SoulFullHeart Way of Life.  Visit https://www.soulfullheartwayoflife.com for more information about space holding sessions, group calls, videos, community, etc.

Visit our website to offer a money donation to support our offerings at https://www.soulfullheartwayoflife/donations.