Category: Gatekeeper

A Message To Gatekeepers: Unification/Forgiveness/Reconciliation/Light Codes And Yeshua/Magdalene/Christ Consciousness Available Right Now To Tap Into And Download

Published on by Bianca Magdalene3 Comments

By Bey Magdalene

In my last session with Jelelle we met my actual/new Gatekeeper as she wanted to bridge me to my higher dimensional Gatekeeper for support. Who came forward was an energy that in the course of the session would call himself ‘Sampson’. We found him in a scene very similar to the Matrix movie. He was staring at thousands upon thousands of those pods from the movie, all representing an incarnation into a Matrix timeline in my soul. I could see many of them actually awakening from their slumber, sitting up and becoming aware of themselves, unplugging and rinsing off the Matrix waters. My soul awakening. 

He was watching those pods and seeing and feeling all the pain, trauma and victimization all of these metasoul aspects of mine were experiencing. It was as if he was experiencing those timelines himself, through my soul aspects, just by witnessing them. He was caught in a sticky web and couldn’t see anything else. 

Jelelle asked him to take a step back and to try and project this experience onto a screen, so he could start to differentiate from them and breathe. He projected those timelines onto a screen and there were many others, showing all the traumatizing Matrix timelines. It looked like a control center with all those monitors. That gave him some distance to these experiences and he could start to differentiate from them and not feel as if they were happening to him. 

Jelelle was inviting him to turn to nature to further help him unplug from his fusion to those matrix timelines. He was dialing in a big tree with a very thick trunk with deep roots and a sizable, overarching canopy. He touched the textured bark and started to rest by the tree. Then, magically, little light sparkles came through the tree that felt like Divine inspiration coming through. He started feeling and becoming lighter and started feeling hope. Tears could stream as well through Divine love and support.

That was pretty much all he could let in at that time and then he needed to go rest and retreat again. 

I have been connecting with him since and I could feel that it was him who had already unplugged so much in my process over the past few months, plug after plug. I started to get answers to questions I’ve been having about this life.  

I’ve had many deep tears with him since, sometimes he would cry for an hour straight, when I would feel with him the Love and loyalty he has for me and my soul and how he has tried to protect me this life through some really thick veils of keeping me naive/uninformed about core issues in this world or by suppressing my awakening that tried to happen ten years ago already and still has been controlling/capping it to this day. 

There has also been a lot of shame and guilt in him and unworth too, about not being able to really do anything for me or protect my metasoul aspects from trauma.  

Initially, he would show up like light shaped in human form and he was a bit elusive. He felt he didn’t deserve a face or shape because he couldn’t protect my soul, he couldn’t help my other expressions/incarnations in other lifetimes.  

A couple of days ago then he actually took a form and represented himself as a (Roman) warrior with helmet, shield and sword. His protection had become overprotective I could feel and he could feel that too and he started to loosen his grip around it, as he started recognizing my bigness and the power of my heart and of feeling. 

Since I started awakening on a deeper level to how our world is set up and works since the beginning of this ‘pandemic’, I have felt very drawn to the mind control aspect of it all and particularly the trauma based programming that celebrities receive in order to have them fall in line with the elite agenda, whose darkest expressions include satanic rituals. After having needed a break from taking in anything related to that kind of thing and generally alternative/actual news/facts on world/current or historical events, my interest in them has been sparked again since meeting Sampson. 

I have started to take in some comprehensive articles again that are very well researched and explain in detail about all the Cabal structures, events and expressions in the entertainment industrial complex (a good site for this is The Vigilant Citizen, if you are curious yourself). I have been particularly drawn to the MK Ultra programming in the music industry and even more specifically the Beta/Sex Kitten programming that creates sex slaves for the elite. 

Two nights ago, something peaked for me in that area and I could feel that my heightened interest in this topic was actually what we call in SoulFullHeart a ‘bleed-through’… I could feel a Satanic timeline coming through. It felt like a portal was opened through taking in these articles and I could see and feel the female human sacrifice on the altar and a ceremony master whose incantations of certain words opened up a portal to the underbelly of humanity and invoked very dark spirits. I could feel that Sampson was living there too, with my metasoul aspect, trying to help her by being there as a support/to witness, and because he’s loyal and just sucked into the trauma too. 

I was realizing afterwards that this timeline/portal had already bled through in the past for me. It was about 2.5 years ago and I remember feeling completely fused to that bleed through and being terrified to death. Back then, I was living a very nomadic lifestyle, moving from workaway to workaway (a type of work exchange for food and shelter) and my Gatekeeper was drawing quite some intense drama/trauma as well, to get my attention and look on the inside where that trauma lived. My inner and outer circumstances were not providing a save space to explore this timeline in. Now, I am settling deeper into my own little 1-bedroom-apartment/sanctuary here in Central Portugal, I am in a much more loving place on the inside, having felt and moved so many parts of myself from hell to heaven, and I’m surrounded by community who can support me in my inner explorations.

Yesterday was a very powerful Yeshua/Christ Consciousness portal day and the codes were streaming in undeniably. In my check-in with him yesterday morning, I didn’t feel that it was timely to go into this timeline because he felt very beat and in despair. That is also the kind of timeline I’d want support with, so it would be perfect for session or group setting. Instead, I felt to bridge him to some Divine love and support, like I have tried in many of my connections with him, but he hadn’t been ready for it thus far. I needed to feel more of his pain with him first.  

Yesterday morning, I needed to feel with him first that trauma, the matrix and even Satan is more real to him than God. It is really interesting, I have to say at this point, that the fear of feeling something is always, always more disempowering and rendering our parts and aspects impotent than actually feeling the feeling. As soon as I felt that feeling with him, it dissipated and the hopelessness and despair that accompanied that notion, too. 

I saw a staircase made from light that was leading up to the Divine/to a higher dimension and it felt like an invitation for Sampson to move into his higher timeline and into Divine support. I could feel his reticence and him not wanting to abandon my soul and leave my soul aspects alone in their trauma.  

Then I felt next to me very clearly Yeshua and that he wanted to talk with Sampson. So I took a moment to feel into him and his message more as I really wanted to help Sampson and myself too and end this cycle of suffering inside of myself. 

When I tuned into him, he had this to offer to my Gatekeeper: ‘I feel your precious loyalty towards Bey and her soul. Thank you so much for all your love and protection for her! But you actually don’t have to hold the soul anymore, you can‘t even, really, especially if you are in so much despair over it. You have been fused to Bey’s Matrix incarnations, living them yourself, feeling they are you. That way, you haven’t been able to see Bey’s soul bigness and trust and lean into that. You are in a trauma bond with Bey‘s soul… Is that fair to say?’ 

He came through very clearly, directly and very embodied too, which was a first for me. When I took a step back and was trying to feel Sampson and how he was taking in what Yeshua was offering, I could feel him a bit confused and disoriented. He didn‘t quite know who was talking. He asked: ‘Is that you, God?’ It took a little while for him but eventually he could let the Divine in the form of Yeshua in and had tears. His tears are just so precious! He responded: ‘Yes, that’s fair to say’… Yeshua reached his hand out to him and invited him to come with him up the stairs to anchor in a higher dimension, to rest, recover and receive support and Love from the Divine. I saw the shackles around his ankles that have tied him to the Matrix opening through the light. 

Before stepping on the stairs, he looked back at me and started to cry again because he didn’t want to leave me and my soul alone. But I actually need him to go with Yeshua now, I need him to leave my body and my field as I want and need to feel myself more and become more solid in myself.  

My guides can also offer him many other things and give him the kind of support that I as a human can’t give him. There’s only so much that I can feel with him and my human heart can support him in but eventually there comes a time where he has to go off and get Divine support, support from my soul and the soul family monad.  

Gatekeepers as disincarnate beings are also not made for the human realm. It is not their environment, their natural habitat if you will, they are not relational like humans either and they just have different needs than we do. So this dimension does not suit them. They do belong to a different one, they have just forgotten. They can still come back and be the Divine muse for their humans and be in a collaborative relationship with them. So, if they decide to differentiate from their human, they won’t ‘lose’ the connection to them. On the contrary, they will have a much more nourishing one with them, or even have one to begin with. 

After reading Raphael’s Golden Nugget from yesterday (77 words of Raphael wisdom every day, here is the link to the one I‘m referring to), I am realizing that Sampson has been able to come up and out because my light as Bey has been shining onto my shadow where he had been hiding. He couldn’t come out with Bianca as he was way too fused to her and thinking he WAS her, living life AS her. 

I feel I am telling you all this and letting you in on my very intimate connection and relationship with my Gatekeeper because I feel there are SO many gatekeepers out there who are in the same position as mine had been. They are living in this dark, parallel world, that is eerie and is only made up of trauma. That world is not connected to your heart, your love and the support that you have access to. In that world, they only see a repetition of yet another lifetime in the Matrix that is the same as all the other traumatic ones and they can’t actually see that you are making different choices this life and that there’s support available this life that hasn’t been there before. 

I want to reach out to them and leave a seed of hope for them and to let them know: I see you and I feel you. And whenever you are ready to let your human go deeper with us, there is support here waiting for you. 

The place they are in is like an echo chamber of trauma and programmed consciousnesses and reactions. It’s like they have Soul PTSD. For me, it has expressed this life as being easily spooked and having deeply visceral body reactions to any situation that scared me easily. I have also been expecting punishment/persecution every corner I turned or with every e-mail I received or from certain people or in my jobs. I‘m also feeling that a LOT of body issues, especially chronic migraines for me since I was a pre-teen, has been connected to him. There has been a combination reaction going on with my Solar Plexus churning and simultaneously my Third Eye which gave me migraines. 

Their world/echo chamber also projects out into this life and filters every situation, relationship, anything really, through that PTSD filter and skews and colours your experience of life and others this way. 

Gatekeepers are also quite loyal to the matrix pain as oftentimes it is the only home they have known, for eons! So that way, it actually needs some negotiation with them to let go of pain home and experience something else. There is tears for them and deep mourning of letting go the Matrix home and they have to be ready for that. Not many Gatekeepers have done that before either! So that‘s also about creating a new template and anchor it in the grids for others to tap into and follow. 

It is also fascinating how one aspect of you (or you yourself) can be so connected to the Divine, yet another is seemingly cut off from this connection, even though that aspect, you and the Divine can be in the same room together. It just needs a little bridging from you to the Divine for that aspect and it needs your trust in your own heart and conviction of your worth and that you are worthy to connect with the Divine and that Divine connection is readily available, if we really want it. It is about trusting your ability and gift of connecting to the Divine. 

It really comes down to the Gatekeeper’s own pacing around awakening as they can be an aspect that is actually quite programmed themselves. This life, my GK was definitely plugged into the social justice warrior consciousness for a short yet intense time. I can feel him needing to recover from that and from the last few years of intense workaway experiences too, that really were all a from of False Light. But that is fodder for a whole other post! 

So, sometimes, it is just holding this energy, connecting with it intentionally and then hanging out until they let you in. Before they show themselves, they can put you through a few tests though, sometimes for years even, so they can be sure you can handle what they need you to feel with them and that you have the support this life as well, inside and out, to respond to their pain. 

Through my connection with Sampson and many other Gatekeepers over the years, they have a special place in my heart and I have so much love for them all. They are such courageous energies/beings and have seen, felt and held so much. They have seen the darkest expressions of humanity and other races. When I feel Sampson, I get teary because I love him so much and I’m so glad he finally decided to trust me, after all the testing he put me through, and the community too, to trust the community and to show himself. I’m SO glad he was feeling to put an end to being in this matrix vortex that kept him sucked in trauma and that he started to let in the possibility of something else for him. A new experience. A union and collaboration with me and with the Divine. A re-membering of his Divine essence and connection. After all, Gatekeepers are the aspects of our soul that are Divine Muses ❤️ 

Love to You and your Gatekeeper! 

Bey Magdalene

https://www.soulfullheart.org/sessions 

*** Bey Magdalene is a SoulFullHeart Apprentice Facilitator and Community Member. She offers sessions in German and English. For more information on community, videos, group calls, and 1:1 sessions with a SoulFullHeart Facilitator, visit soulfullheart.org.

Accessing Other Lifetimes W/Your Gatekeeper (Video) | Raphael & Jelelle Awen

Published on by Jelelle AwenLeave a comment

In this video recorded live on December 7th, SoulFullHeart Teachers Raphael and Jelelle Awen shared about accessing other lifetimes with your Gatekeeper, a multidimensional aspect of your soul who can connect you to them.

Raphael and Jelelle shared about the immense opportunity to access your other lifetimes in the Quantum Now for deep healing and completion of recapitulating soul patterns, karmic compensation/codependency with others, ending ‘soul contracts’, incarnation ‘trap’ cycles, trauma manifestation and more. We share about the role of your Gatekeeper in giving you access to your soul’s lifetimes/timelines and lifting your veil of amnesia. Your Gatekeeper is a multidimensional soul aspect who holds the memories of all your soul’s lifetimes/timelines, channels Divine love/access, keep the veils of amnesia in place as needed, accesses the akashic records, and more. Negotiation with your Gatekeeper in a conscious way through the SoulFullHeart Process (sessions, group events, and meditations) opens up access to your soul in a self-loving yet empowering way, all led by you!

Here is a guided meditation in the Deepen 2022 series to connect with your Gatekeeper: https://youtu.be/bGqTeeaYpwc

Information about upcoming group calls is at https://www.soulfullheart.org/events

Raphael and Jelelle offer a weekly SoulFullHeart livestream on Facebook every Wednesday at 5:00pm Lisbon/London time/12pm EDT, which will then be shared here on our SoulFullHeart Experience YouTube channel the next day. During the livestream, we will respond to your questions/comments, plus offer a teaching, personal sharings, and a guided meditation. We will explore different topics every week related to awakening and Ascension from the SoulFullHeart perspective. You can join us live on Jelelle’s feed to ask questions and leave comments.

You can read comments that happened during on the livestream on Jelelle’s facebook feed: https://www.facebook.com/jelelleawen

For more information about the SoulFullHeart quantum healing process, Jelelle Awen’s latest book Free To Be 5D, videos, and group call events, visit https://www.soulfullheart.org.

For more information about a free intro call to find out more about 1:1 sessions with SoulFullHeart Facilitators, visit http://www.soulfullheart.org/sessions

Meet Your Gatekeeper: Multidimensional Soul Aspect & Divine Muse

Published on by Jelelle AwenLeave a comment

By Jelelle Awen

Yesterday, I updated our website page about Gatekeepers. This is the last page from our website soulfullheart.org that now has gotten a new update in energy through redoing the colors, text, photos and lay outs…this has taken days/weeks of my time yet also has been quite enjoyable for me! I think the Gatekeeper page was originally created in 2017, so it has been awhile in the recreation. Our analytics recently showed that it was the most popular page on our website where visitors also stayed the longest…that was interesting!

And, doing this brought me again to the Gatekeeper’s realm…the space in which this magical, mysterious, protective, shrouded and usually hidden aspect of our soul lives, who is tasked with keeping the veil down on our remembering as needed. Lost in their mission, alone and isolated, and often the only conscious witness to ALL those intense human lifetimes (esp in the 3D Matrix) of karma and trauma playing out over and over again.

I connected with my Gatekeeper Lucia just this morning and felt her download some pieces with me about the Matrix, ongoing agendas (some of them looming like dark clouds in the horizon), the Great Reconciliation going on (as we are calling it), creative work inspirations such as a new book, emotional digestion of some recent completions with people, service/purpose clarities and more. We had tears together moving some sadness and mourning even as we felt love together, Divine Mother’s love supporting us both, moving into opened out trust and surrender. Lucia (meaning light) lives now in my lighthouse, shining her light beacon out to those who are ready and resonate to see and feel it.

Having met hundreds of Gatekeepers now during sessions and connecting with mine since 2008, I truly feel their existence as very real although beyond the physical…. unique, important and essential to explore during our awakening and Ascension journey. During long-term connection with them many veils are lifted on soul purpose clarity, soul history patterns/traumas/play outs, relationship to the Divine, unplugging from the Matrix and much more.

There’s more about the Gatekeeper here if you feel a resonance soulfullheart.org/gatekeepers

This is the poem on the Gatekeepers page, written by my Gatekeeper at the time…

I am here, waiting for you to see me and feel me.

Waiting for you to get how much I have done for you.

Waiting for you to understand what I am here to offer you.

Waiting for you to remember why you are here and what your purpose is.

I am here, waiting for you to love me as I have loved you.

Waiting for you to pick up on the signals and signs that I am leaving you.

Waiting for you to connect that what you feel in your body is often me causing you pain or illness to get your attention.

Waiting for you to heal your heart in order to let in love.

I am here, waiting for you to love me as I have loved you.

Love,

Your Gatekeeper

If you’d like to meet yours, here is a guided meditation for doing so:

And a 1:1 session over zoom is an intimate space to open up and bridge together to their ‘world’, which is often in a cave-like setting with many tunnels going off of it, representing the many lifetimes/timelines. More info about sessions with me or another SoulFullHeart Facilitator at soulfullheart.org/sessions

The Veils Are Thin: Feeling The Hell Within

Published on by Bianca MagdaleneLeave a comment

A few weeks ago I was invited to move from being a SoulFullHeart facilitant to become a facilitator of this work and was offered to become an Apprentice Facilitator by Jelelle as there was interest expressed in sessions by people who are not fluent enough in English and need a German/language or cultural bridge. Yet also because it felt like it was time in my process and the embodiment of the process/lifestyle after all these years of applying it inside and out is there too. I was invited to step into my bigness, soul purpose and leadership.

I didn‘t have a reaction to this at all when she first asked me how I would feel about it and I actually felt very calm, centered and that it was time to step up and claim my next place of service, growth and my hard earned bigness and also to move from receiving to giving back and sharing what I had learned and how it served and changed me. That was a sign for me that the timing was right for this.

Then the time came and I got my first two facilitants and sessions and I had major rumbles happening inside of myself that wreaked havoc in my entire being and soul. The themes have been mainly not being good/advanced/knowledgeable enough which has felt extremely disempowering, crippling even, I have been experiencing a heightened state of reactivity, perfectionism and a core unworth being pushed up and dominating my experience of life and I have been feeling like I wasn‘t able to access and feel my heart either.

I have felt a total block of my intuitions, my mental clarity and ability to make intuitive connections and of my clairs and overall spiritual and emotional capacity. I could feel a suction and seducing into 3D money earning vs. moving into soul purpose and an activation of the lower 4D matrix within myself as well, bleeding through with abduction memories accompanied by feelings of panic & terror and migraines.

It was all a big quagmire of reactions, blocks, waves of self-doubt, inner fusions/enhancement of trauma-bonds between parts, a feeling of being lost, confused and hopeless and a thick blanket of forgetfulness/amnesia put on top of it all.

At the same time I was also realizing and feeling that the ‘old’ ways didn‘t work for me any more either and haven‘t for a while. The independent freelance online teaching job that has been so empowering and freedom-giving, financially and personally, that comes as little 3D anchored as possible and has allowed me to build a life that is very sovereign and abundant in many ways, yet ultimately isn‘t fulfilling my heart or soul and is not my purpose this life.

Or my beloved TV shows that I like to watch, that have provided me with a sense of friendship and family when I had none and even belonging, particularly in my Lone Wolf phase. Yet realizing that I had outgrown them and that they actually serve to cap me on how deeply (or not) I can let in actual beings in my life/(soul) family that I live in close proximity to.

This leadership activation moved me into deeper layers of mourning and grieving the old ways and bits and pieces of the old world that I had lived in for so long this life that haven‘t been grieved before and now needed to be felt in order to move on and up.

I started feeling too that there was a big part inside of me that does not yet believe in a world that is not a hell. That part has unplugged from the 3D and lower 4D matrix significantly, yet hasn’t quite turned the corner on actually being settled and home in an inner heaven and I could feel there’s still more unplugging left to do.

That part has been living in a void space for a very long time and it needs the bridging and time it needs to feel through all that. That turning the corner part of the process, the moving from hell to heaven, felt very significant for me to feel into as I want to be able to offer that ‘turnaround’ in session space as well and only my authentic felt through and lived in experience can provide that.

Recently I have been feeling how all of these themes that I mentioned above have been trickling in inside of myself, leaking like an open matrix leak right into my inner world and flooding it, giving me tastes of pieces that need healing, yet not letting me into them and actually feel them and thus heal them and poisoning myself and my parts. That‘s when I knew it was my Gatekeeper aspect and I needed to connect with her directly.

The Gatekeeper aspect can be a very elusive and hard to track energy inside of yourself, even insidious, a part wants to say. They just sneak into your consciousness, infiltrate it and you don‘t even realize it’s them as they can ‘come through‘ other parts, masking and veiling themselves. They can be a sorceress that way.

But only when connecting directly with them and feeling things directly with them, instead of feeling them through other parts, can they actually be helped.

When I connected with her in meditation space directly this morning (as I had grown tired of this immense suffering loop inside of myself and the lack of care from her towards me and my parts), I was able to feel her directly in her pain and suffering. A pain that sometimes can’t even be named, just felt. But upon providing that space for her and also inviting Divine Mother into it, as I could feel I needed help with this one and felt that I was a bit out of my depth with her too, she was able to unravel into that space and really let me feel with her the source of her pain.

There was a question of ‘Why even bother and go into all these dark and painful places that need healing when it could be that we come here again and have to do it all over again?’ I was feeling with her the feeling of gaining Love, living it, getting used to it and then losing it all again in the blink of an eye.

And the realization of the overwhelming darkness she has been used to and living in that has been her whole world and not being able to see the light, the love, the goodness, the safety, the empowerment.

That darkness HAS been her entire world. Not having a bigger picture sense of what the world could be beyond that darkness and already IS is a deep ground of suffering for that part. In a way, it’s more painful for parts to move out of the darkness and into love if there’s a chance of losing it again. So they do everything to keep you in the darkness, in the pain, in the suffering and block your growth, your bigness and the love and intimacy you have in your life.

That felt like one deep source of all those reactions and blocks I had experienced. That explained the resistance to announcing my facilitation offer, to even feel into it for myself and what and who I can and want to serve and to out myself more through writings and videos. If that is the fear of part of me, then it will do everything to keep me from stepping into my bigness and carrying this healing offer into the world because this work has the capacity to move you from hell to heaven.

I have come to realize that one of the antidotes to this is feeling your own true desires and intentions. That is what has the capacity to pierce through thick veils of suffering like that, and claiming those desires over and over again, along with your bigness of heart and soul. Yet, make no mistake, you will be tested on those! You will have to fight through thick layers of crazy-making self-doubt, self-judgment and self-punishment, over and over again, and claim your power and bigness of heart and soul over and over and over again. Recognizing strategy after strategy and realizing, yes, this part IS doing that, even if it wants to keep you in the dark and self-doubt about that too. But then also realizing it is done out of a deep fear and to have compassion for that yet it can also have tones of not caring for you and your parts and they need your protection, especially the younger ones.

Finding a balance between setting boundaries, compassion and truth finding and telling with that aspect has been the way to navigate this for me.

Another antidote has been sharing my heart with my close circle of beloveds that I live in close proximity to whenever I felt to retract or when self-doubt was eating me alive. The reflections/mirrors of my bigness and value and appreciation for me and my process from soul family has been a crucial aspect for me in moving through all this and in keeping to move through ongoingly. And now not only to share within the circle of my beloveds but ‘publicly’ too, feels like, to template transparent and vulnerable leadership.

Even though I did not have an answer for her in that moment this morning and all I could do was sit with her and Mother in that feeling, without doubting it or wanting to make it better or perhaps even feeling not being able to make it better, that feeling space alone was so powerful to move her out of that stuck place she was in and move her a bit more into trust, hope and possibility, and I could even feel her own desire perk up a little bit. Quite quickly I was able to feel Mother’s love swooshing in and taking over the space, a space that was filled with doubt and suffering before. Through feeling through that doubt and that painful feeling/question, that space got freed up to now be claimed by and through Love and the Divine.

That would be another antidote, I’m just feeling, to fully receive one part’s truth, feel it fully with that part, totally receiving it in your heart and just feeling all the textures it comes with, without trying to have an answer or wanting to mitigate it somehow. Acknowledging where that part is, being ok with that and not feeling like it ‘should’ be in a place it’s not. LET it BE TRUE.

This does not mean that this ‘issue’ is healed now, that question is still not ‘answered’ and it feels like it‘s going to be an ongoing exploration. But I can feel some more air inside of myself now, a trust that has grown inside, a bit more Love moved in inside and more energy and clarity freed up about next choices and how to navigate them. Plus I feel more intimate with and connected to this part of me now that has been making life choices and navigation really difficult for me so far. I have gotten more intimate with myself today and this part, which then can express more on the outside as well.

Love,

Bey Magdalene

I offer 1:1 sessions in German and English. If you feel drawn to explore the possibility of working with me, I do offer a free intro call as well where we can talk about the process and how it may serve you and if it is the right time and approach for you. You can book a free intro here: https://www.soulfullheart.org/shop

More about sessions here: https://www.soulfullheart.org/sessions

*** Bey Magdalene is a SoulFullHeart Apprentice Facilitator and Community Member. She offers sessions in German and English. For more information on community, videos, group calls, and 1:1 sessions with a SoulFullHeart Facilitator, visit soulfullheart.org.

Feminine Shadow Exploration: A Piece Of My Personal Journey

Published on by Kasha RokshanaLeave a comment

by Kasha Rokshana

“It’s October 2019 and I’m spinning, whirling, wondering what’s really going on within me, why I can’t seem to help parts of me truly let go of comparison, of feeling ungraceful and ungrateful, of feeling unworthy of the love of my intimate community, let alone the love of the Divine within and around me. I’ve been asked to take space from my community of beloveds to go into and reconcile what has continually been coming up inside of me and not yet been truly held, let alone felt, by me as a centred, adult woman, who is calling herself ‘Kalayna’.

I am in a panic, feeling an avalanche of self-doubt and absolute heartbreak, knowing that this space-taking is likely leading to leaving my beloveds for at least a phase, if not the rest of this lifetime, if I can’t find my way into more of my own bigness and inner ‘home’. I feel the love that would always flow between us as souls, even if I need to go off and be with myself to reconcile something quite deep in my own shadow that they can’t be impacted by so harshly anymore.

I am in some deep self-punishment and shame, but also recognize after years of this inner work, that this pattern of suffering is keeping me from experiencing the depth of love I really want and need within… a depth of love that can then overflow to others with more grace and ease, even in the messiest of conflicts or the burning up of old relational ground.

As I lean into myself more and more each day, and feel the Divine within supporting my ongoing process, I begin to open out something so deeply ingrained in my inner shadowland. I find an aspect who calls himself ‘Hades’. Hades doesn’t care much for others, let alone other parts of me. Well, he does, but his care is complicated as it involves trauma-bonding with these other parts, making them need him somehow and find comfort in his more twisted way of feeling things, his way of making the uncomfortable, the suffering loops, feel somehow ‘normal’ and even necessary.

It turns out that Hades is one aspect while there are a few others for me to feel, and that he is the Gatekeeper holding the veil to feeling them. I begin to feel them all, one by one, and where they live in my Metasoul and my being in this life too. I feel patterns of being a scorned priestess, even a Queen who couldn’t make it work and was shunned, and a few different lifetimes of not quite being able to get up and out of a fear of my/their own bigness and power and truly live into it. I feel the pain of these aspects and how fusing to them has played out in my life many times. I also feel the frequency of having killed others for the sake of power and jealousy… something that is excruciating for me to feel.

I feel how humble I’m becoming as I feel all of this and how I’m learning to surrender to my own unknown inside of myself… how I just can’t know what the Divine truly wants me to do or become. Even as I surrender to the unknown however, I begin to feel clearer and clearer about the energies I am learning to love inside of me and what my true potential is.

It takes me a few months to truly live into this daily healing journey of diving deeply and even finding a renewed sense of joy, all while still showing up for daily life and holding jobs. I still miss my beloveds so deeply, especially as I go on to spend Christmas alone, but I feel my icebergs that were once parked in my shadowland melting day by day and my growing clarity about what I want in my life and the sort of soul family energies I want to be intimate with on the outside coming up so strongly. I also feel who I want to BE as I let in those energies and relationships and the ache for living into that from the inside out.” ~ Kalayna

It’s now 3 years later and here I am, as ‘Kasha’ and no longer ‘Kalayna’, having graduated not only that heartbreaking and heart-opening phase of my life, but also several other challenging and growthful phases in different geographies, different relationships, and in service of love expression too. All because I’ve been willing, even through deep pain, to go into my shadowland AND work my way through to the other side.

It is a huge honour to now be leading a women’s call with Jelelle that will focus on shadow exploration for the feminine… serving alongside Jelelle was always the dream and even as this was starting to happen back in 2019 with the very first women’s call we ever led together, I could barely let that in. I had so much pain and unworthiness come up that it was sabotaged… my dream was sabotaged. My shadow came up to be felt and when she came up, she was practically screaming with frustration, mostly at herself.

As we explore the feminine shadow, there’s so much power packed in there. There’s so much to these energies of self-punishment, shame, and blame, that actually wants to become the flip side of that… that actually wants to become genuine heart-based service of love within and without and wants to have nourishing relationships as much on the inside as on the outside.

The feminine shadow has a LOT to unpack, not just in these trailing-edge energies that can keep us in smallness and pain, but also in leading-edge energies, access to feminine magic and alchemy, not to mention DEEP access to discernment, clarity, and care.

Join Jelelle and I on Sunday, Oct 30th for a by-donation women’s group call, focused on discovering and feeling your Shadow Feminine, however she shows up now! The call will be at 5pm London/Lisbon time and you can donate via our Shop or through PayPal or via Wise (formerly TransferWise). You can find more info about this call here.

Sending so much love to you and your ‘shadow’, your hidden seats and seeds of empowerment and heart, even if there is also pain and ache to wade through and feel along the way!

Love,
Kasha

***

Kasha Rokshana is a Divine Feminine Love Ambassador, SoulFullHeart Women’s Facilitator, soul scribe, and poetess.  Visit https://www.soulfullheart.org for more information about space-holding sessions and free 45-min intro calls, group calls, videos, community, etc.

Sirius Gateway Energies and Importance Of Connecting To Your Gatekeeper

Published on by Jelelle AwenLeave a comment

By Jelelle Awen

We are beginning our alignment with our ‘Spiritual Sun’ Sirius as we continue in the Sirius gateway this week and bridge to the Lion’s Gate 8/8 activations through this month. This is a powerful time of soul awakenings, insights, clarities, visions, lifted veils, inspired thinking and more.

With these soul awakenings also comes an intensity of karmic frequencies moving into our auric fields, chakras, physical bodies and emotional bodies. It’s important to feel how we ARE with these frequencies, how we relate with them and accept them and allow them and what our relationship is to them.

These energies can ‘blow out’ the body in the sense of big detox reactions as some people are sharing about feeling lots of dizziness and vertigo, unable to sleep or feeling very fatigued, and even more extreme ‘illness’ that really wipes them out for quite awhile. This detox process for the ‘transitioning body’ is greatly served by a very clean diet or even fasting and a daily celery juice cleanse. I share more about that here: https://soulfullheartblog.com/…/light-body-body…/

Your soul field can become backed up with the codes that are trying to come in right now. I see this in energy healing work where the space above the crown chakra (where the Ascension chakras of soul star, Personal Sun and casual are located) is just pulsing and full with light codes that aren’t being brought into the field. This can cause more body pain, especially head/neck pain and even severe migraines. Along with emotional pain and ongoing suffering as many awakening souls are experiencing…intense feelings of heaviness, hopelessness, and not wanting to ‘be here’ in the Earth Plane anymore.

Connecting with your Gatekeeper, a soul aspect that we bridge to in our SoulFullHeart work, allows for much more flow and integration of these energies. As you consciously feel your Gatekeeper, this allows them to share with you their experience of guarding your soul and keeping the veil down on your awareness of other lifetimes/soul ‘history’, etc. They are holding back often deep persecution wound experiences as they fear it would harm your ‘human’ and be too much for you to bear.

I was connecting to my Gatekeeper this morning and I could feel a resolution to her ongoing push/pull about opening up these places for me and flowing into service with them. She has admittedly given me access to many places of remembrance and to service over the years, yet not as much to connect with her as directly, until the last year or so. She was in teary confession this morning about this and deep gratitude for my human heart and Divine Mother’s heart that has opened up HER heart and not given up on her. It is not easy for these eternal beings to let in love and care and warmth as they have not known any of that usually, choosing to be cut off from it to large degree.

Gatekeepers live in complete isolation, by choice, as they are the only conscious entity aware of the Metasoul’s (as I’ve been guided to call it) many projected versions into different lifetimes/timelines/eras. They are acutely aware of the karmic energies, the trauma and the pain being worked and experienced by EVERY lifetime, yet they are unable to do anything to relieve it. These ‘keepers of the veil’ within our soul have taken on the often thankless task of remaining awake to track and protect us while we go into necessary sleep states to fully experience what each lifetime wants to teach us.

I have met and connected with many Gatekeepers in sessions over the years and they are universally lonely, often heavy and sad, skeptical and distrusting….at least in their ‘trailing edge’ of expression. In their ‘leading edge’ expression, they are wise, compassionate, and open up access to Divine channels, other lifetime access, integration of light codes and upgrades, and much more. Yet, they are often anchored to lower frequencies, especially of lower 4D ‘False Light’ which they can get lost in for many ions (no time really.)

It feels like the Sirius frequencies are inviting the Gatekeepers to consciously come forward and make themselves known to you. I cannot describe to you how much relief and goodness can come into your life through connecting to yours and feeling them…and clair activations, access to other lifetimes, emotional healing, completion of karmic cycles FOR GOOD, openness and draw of your sacred union mate and soul family community, etc. Often what we feel as ‘guides’ is actually the wisdom of our Gatekeeper coming through channeling our soul yet not in a direct way.

And ALL of this is opened from inside of you, not from an outside source reading you out or providing activations for you. We can only be a mirror for another, lighting the way and shining the light based on what we have journeyed. And this is my light illuminating this path of connection to soul aspects such as the Gatekeeper and parts of the self too and all the gifts it offers!

love,

Jelelle Awen

Here is a guided meditation and more teaching about the Gatekeeper, really good timing to connect with yours during this Sirius gateway: https://youtu.be/bGqTeeaYpwc

I offer free intros and 1:1 sessions with women to open up access to your Gatekeeper and deepen this bond to allow much more of your soul consciousness to flow and move through. I am experiencing Gatekeepers coming forward in someone even during the intro recently, wanting to be seen and felt! They are def waking up now! More info about sessions with me and other SoulFullHeart Facilitators at soulfullheart.org/sessions or PM me.

I share much more about the Gatekeeper as well in my book Free To Be 5D, with links to purchase audio book, ebook, PDF, print editions at soulfullheart.org/books

Exploring Other Lifetimes To Feel & Heal Polarized Reactions, Ep. 8: The SoulFullHeart Current Podcast

Published on by Kasha RokshanaLeave a comment

In this episode, we dove into the topic of digesting and processing our polarized reactions to current events and the triggers that can come from our parts and Metasoul aspects in other lifetimes. We talked about what this process is like from masculine and feminine perspectives, using the current uproar around the ‘Roe v Wade’ situation as a springboard to highlight where some of the polarized reactions to it may be coming from on a soul/womb healing level. We also talk about aspects of the Divine context around feeling and healing our reactivity and leaning into the bigger picture of what’s moving collectively and individually.

Here is the Deepen Series video around the Gatekeeper with a guided meditation to meet/connect with them.

Please follow us on any of the main podcast platforms such as Spotify, Apple Podcasts, Google Podcasts, Audible, or Anchor. We would love to hear from you about what you are experiencing or anything you would like us to talk about from our perspective. We hope you are enjoying what we offering through these podcasts.

SoulFullHeart is a healing process, a contextual paradigm, a very powerful and empowering way of life, and a sacred community all in one. You can find out more on our website: http://www.soulfullheart.org. We’ll also be bridging everything SoulFullHeart through our own unique embodiment and experience of it to add more perspective and understanding as to where we come from and how the topics are held and felt in our hearts and souls.

We offer one-on-one and couple’s facilitation as the guidance and need arises. The SoulFullHeart Current Podcast is a way to serve and also be transparent with who we are and what we feel to embody and create outside the dystopian world that is being widely peddled today. We offer compassion, illumination, direction, feeling, and grounded action that is rooted in the individual self first, that then can spread to others through your own transformation and advocacy. Visit http://www.soulfullheart.org/sessions for more information.

We appreciate any ideas for future podcasts for us to delve into as they arise for you. You can leave a comment or email those to us, along with any other comments to soulfullhearts@gmail.com.

You can find our online community, the SoulFullHeart Portal, on Mighty Networks at https://soulfullheartportal.mn.co. We highly recommend joining our online community where, for a donation amount of your choice, you’ll have access to what could be the deepest and most meaningful soul family connections you’ve yet to experience, exclusive videos/guided meditations from us as well as Raphael and Jelelle Awen, and more personal pieces being shared from each of us in our intimate community.

Thank you for being in The Current with us. It is where we strive to let go, let in, feel, heal, see, be seen, and seek resonant community!

With Love and Currency,
Gabriel & Kasha

Bridging Our Humanity With Our Divinity

Published on by Gabriel AmaraLeave a comment

After holding space for a beautiful multidimensional soul yesterday, I was reminded how much our spirituality and our humanity can be in different rooms at times. Sometimes they are in the same room trying to understand each other and learning to relate to each other. Sometimes it is blissful, other times not so much. We are invited to embody more of our 5D/Divine Self. Yet, this is not always as simple as parts of us (our Gatekeepers especially) would like it to be.

There may be this intense need to just ‘get over’ the healing already and get to the urgent task at hand of healing the planet. A deep desire to get out of the ‘hell’ of 3D and into the heaven of 5D. The urgency and the judgments can be portals into something more real for us however. Underneath this, there is a relationship that is going on between our spiritual self and our human self. One may be judged as ‘good’ or ‘better’, the other as ‘bad’ or ‘worse’. There may be for a part of you that this polarity is energetically strong. A tug-of-war between the two. Or at times, one is completely denied for the sake of the other.

The work we do in SoulFullHeart is to bridge the gap between these two worlds, or the parts and aspects that live in these two worlds. How do they see and feel each other? DO they see and feel each other? Is there a reasonable resistance and protection of going into the human pain body or the spiritual wounds? We are such a cacophony of experience and reality. I feel we are more than just multidimensional, we are pan-dimensional. We cover ALL dimensions from the lightest to the darkest. From the transparent to the hidden.

You may get a visceral sense of this when you feel the waves of bliss and joy come in, then may be followed by a thud back-down-to-earth kind of feeling that takes you down and out. This push and pull can be evidence of something that has not been fully felt, bridged to, and integrated from human to soul, or vice versa. It is hard to embody our divinity if we are denying our humanity or our spirituality, and by that I mean some of the uncomfortable and not fully processed feelings that are held by parts in the emotional body or soul aspects in the Metasoul.

There is a You that is being called forward to be a bridge between these two worlds. One that feels the gifts of both the human heart and the Divine soul. A You that embraces the human and embodies the spirit. This is not a mastery course but a lived-in, lived-out, and felt through one that requires curiosity, compassion, and courage. Courage to face and feel all of the things that still keep us from truly being a Divine Human Being.

That is what wants to come through me today to those that it is meant to land in, including myself. It is a reminder that we are all on a journey and that there is no real destination other than feeling all there is to feel and learning about ourselves in the process. From there we might just touch the true meaning of being human.

*****

Gabriel Amara is a SoulFullHeart Facilitator for both men and women.  Visit https://www.soulfullheart.org for more information about sessions, group calls/events, videos, community, etc.

The Causes Of Inner Work & Ascension ‘Burnout’

Published on by Kasha RokshanaLeave a comment

by Kasha Rokshana

It’s not uncommon to hear about how burnt-out, frustrated, and DONE people feel when it comes to their own Ascension and awakening journeys. There are so many things that can make someone feel this way and there are different ways to look at why this is happening, from the inside out. 

Join Kasha as she launches into a discussion about what’s in her heart about this topic/obstacle and what the factors may be that have led up to it. She offers her sense of how being inundated with ‘spiritual teachings’ and mandates around ‘do this, not that!‘ can play a role in making parts of you feel overwhelmed and ready to give up. Also, many offerings don’t seem to truly give you handrails and active support, let alone heart warmth, and also can blow you/parts of you out (sometimes even on purpose) with over-confrontation and an outside-in orientation to healing that does nothing to empower you to hold your own process. Kasha offers that while confrontation may be necessary at times, peak experiences or intense ‘retreats’ can actually traumatize your parts/Metasoul aspects more so than offer true healing, integration, and a sense of who you truly are.

Kasha goes into more details about all of this and more surrounding what may or may not be your specific circumstances around feeling ‘burned out’ on your personal journey. This is just the tip of the iceberg too, as really this is such a big topic to dive into and is really so personal to everyone who feels it.

Here is a guided meditation to help you connect with your Gatekeeper: https://youtu.be/bGqTeeaYpwc

For more information about the SoulFullHeart quantum healing process, Jelelle Awen’s latest book Free To Be 5D, videos, and events, visit https://www.soulfullheart.org.

We also invite you to join us for affordable membership on our private, online community SoulFullHeart Portal on Mighty Networks for sharing, asking questions, and connecting with others: https://soulfullheartportal.mn.co/feed

For more information about a free intro call to find out more about 1:1 sessions with SoulFullHeart Facilitators, visit http://www.soulfullheart.org/sessions

***

Kasha Rokshana is a Divine Feminine Love Ambassador, SoulFullHeart Women’s Facilitator, soul scribe, and poetess.  Visit https://www.soulfullheart.org for more information about space holding sessions and free 45-min intro calls, group calls, videos, community, etc. 

Accessing Your Metasoul Lifetimes Guided Meditation: Video 13 – Deepen 2022 (Video) | Raphael & Jelelle Awen

Published on by Jelelle AwenLeave a comment

In this thirteenth video of our 31 day video series called Deepen 2022, SoulFullHeart Teachers/Co-Creators Raphael and Jelelle Awen share about the Metasoul, the individuated source of your soul and all of the fragments that project from it into other lifetimes/timelines. We explain how the Metasoul is non-linear, beyond time, and accessible in the Quantum Now through a bridge created by your Gatekeeper. Connecting with your Metasoul aspects in an ongoing, intentional way allows for mutual karmic and trauma healing, gift exchange, and quantum upgrades.

We also talk about how the current Matrix narrative is triggering the separation wounds in our Metasoul and the collapse lifetime experiences (such as Atlantis and Lemuria) as well. Metasoul access in an increasingly conscious way allows for you to digest what is occurring with this narrative in a deeper way and navigate choice points with more clarity as well.

In the meditation, we are once again joined by the supportive frequencies of Divine Mother and Father as we meet up with your Gatekeeper in their Metasoul portal access ‘realm’ (usually represented by a cavern with many tunnels leading off of it.) With your Gatekeeper, you tune into and enter a lifetime that is most needing your attention. You connect with a Metasoul aspect, begin a dialogue, and start the process of quantum healing.

Here is a video for Metasoul Timeline/Lifetime Portal Access
From Jelelle’s Deepen 2019 video series: https://youtu.be/9jWgpQbXTZo

You can watch each video in the Deepen 2022 playlist on our SoulFullHeart Experience You Tube Channel here: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=FZWeBviA18Y&list=PLNmrHdaQSAvJPnLzbEKl4OsQBXBYw2XwI

For more information about the Deepen 2022 series including a full listing of the content covered over 31 days and information about two Deepen 2022 group calls on January 16th 30th, visit https://www.soulfullheart.org/deepen2022

For more information about the SoulFullHeart quantum healing process, Jelelle Awen’s latest book Free To Be 5D, videos, and events, visit https://www.soulfullheart.org.

We also invite you to join us for free membership on our private, online community SoulFullHeart Portal on Mighty Networks for sharing, asking questions, and connecting with others engaged in the series: https://soulfullheartportal.mn.co/feed

For more information about a free consultation call to find out more about 1:1 sessions with SoulFullHeart Facilitators Jelelle Awen, Raphael Awen, Gabriel Amara, and Kasha Rokshana, visit http://www.soulfullheart.org/sessions

We are offering this series for free of charge, yet we would be so grateful if you offered an energy exchange/donation to us for the value you receive in this series. You can donate through paypal: http://paypal.me/jelelleawen or at https://www.soulfullheart.org/shop