Sometimes Love Don’t Feel Like It ‘Should’: The Rumble Of Awakening

As you enter the vast universe of our deepest truths and bring those to the forefront of your daily and “at the moment” consciousness, the life that was created in service to that hidden reality has no choice but to rumble. As I remember the beginnings of my own awakening journey and those that I have served and am currently serving, this is a very cataclysmic part of the process to the part of us that have kept things tidy and manageable, even as it suffered over it.

As you become aware of the emotional intricacies of the current web of relationship, you can begin to feel the network of cords that were created as a result of this part’s need to conform, follow duty, and be loyal. It was what this part thought was needed to do in order to love or be loved. To protect and be protected. But when you start to awaken to the reality that many of your current connections may be based on something less than authentic to your growing understanding of what you are meant to be and experience, this web cannot be unaffected by coming to terms with your new emotional and spiritual reality.

Pulling out of this old matrix of 3D relationship can be a tough one as it tugs on our inner guilt and shame. It can be hard for the part of us that feels a responsibility in the emotional responses of others. It doesn’t feel very loving to hurt others. It can feel like you are being selfish and uncaring. Think of a spider web and you are at one of the crossings. If you pull on that it affects all those around that are connected in that web. You make waves and rumbles when you begin to realize this arrangement is no longer in service of your highest self.

This leaves others wondering what the hell is going on. “Why are you doing this?” It does change their lives as they have their own agreements with you, and you are changing the game and the rules. Others will get hurt if they cannot feel where you are coming from and are not ready to go to the new places you are. There is only so much explaining you can do. Sometimes love for all involved is about feeling the pain that lies underneath it all and letting the chips fall where they may with as much compassion and care as possible. You cannot cure other people’s sorrows for they are a part of their own journey of awakening.

In SoulFullHeart we feel the parts and soul aspects of you that can feel the guilt, shame, and fear of changing the course of lives. This was all made possible by the higher selves of those involved. You can only own your own responsibility within the web and understand that there is no harm done when it is all coming from real love, the love that is aching for parts of you to be seen and felt, honored and cherished. The experience that others have are for their own learning and growth needs. That is can be difficult when there is an emotional and spiritual bind between hearts and souls.

This is the hard part of awakening and ascension for those that are still in the midsts of realizing the reality of what is before them. By feeling the parts of you INside you can create one courageous choice at a time that is meant to serve the highest good for all involved with compassion, remorse, and real love. The kind that we all have been avoiding as it leads us to worlds we have been so conditioned to fear…the largess of our infinite soul.

Gabriel Heartman is an emoto-spiritual men’s and women’s facilitator, energy healer, writer, poet, and heartist with the SoulFullHeart Way of Life.  Visit for more information about space holding sessions, group calls, videos, community, etc.

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