Sacred Union Codes Inviting You Into Union With Self, Getting Ready If Single, Completing Scared Unions

By Jelelle Awen
The sacred love, the love of SELF ultimately that overflows into the love WITH other that creates a union.
We are being invited into this sacred love with union of inner and outer, to begin with the unionizing of aspects of SELF….from the shadow to the light, to those from the Stars to those from childhood, those aspects that we have embraced and BEcome our persona and unaware ego and those that arise from our soul and higher self.
Gathering together the pieces of SELF, inviting them into the light of our heart love, bringing them ‘home’ in our heart, letting them feel that an awakening version of US, an embodiment of our higher self is THERE for them. The most loving parental energy arises in us to hold the edges, the pains, the wounds, the doubts, the hiding, the compensating….to love and accept it ALL and then invite these aspects to transmute with love.
The codes for sacred unions are BEing downloaded now and you feel them if you are meant to feel them. Raphael and I are co-creating a writing about these codes and the differences between a sacred union and a scared union, we will be sharing this soon.
If single, and especially if you are being fastracked in ascension related to being a leader/teacher/waySHOWer, you feel these sacred union codes as a renewed desire and need to BE with yourself and to be revealed to yourself, and to see what has been previously hard to see. It is a desire to ‘clean out and get ready’, similar to a pregnant mom’s urges to get the nest ready before the baby. Getting the nest ready is feeling the inner protector and what energies still guard your heart and soul and WHY. This is the process we offer in SoulFullHeart to provide guidance and support and community and MAYBE your sacred union mate is involved with SoulFullHeart TOO, so that’s a motivating reason perhaps to join us for a group call or session space.
If single, the codes are inviting you to be MORE OPEN than maybe you ever have been before to seeing and feeling your sacred union mate. You may even already know them, yet your inner protector may be filtering them out, judging them, or dismissing them or evaluating them from a certain perspective. Our sacred union mate is often NOT what we expect in terms of a physical package or even ‘ideal geography’ or even age difference….yet the grounds of HOT body talk, ALIVE mental talk, DEEP soul talk, VULNERABLE heart talk are undeniable once opened out to and let in. The codes are inviting you to PURSUE too, even women, with your vulnerability and openness and willingness to be hurt yet also willingness to experience a deeper love than you have ever known. To bring what you want and what you desire to the soul who has drawn your attention and interest. To move out of safety and comfort, to take the risk of being rejected (there is no REAL rejection at the soul level since all of it has been agreed to already)…
If you are in a relationship, you may feel these sacred union codes as creating a rumble in yourself, in clarities around what you want and don’t want, what you have been ‘living with’ versus what you really want. Being able to settle or shrink is running out of ground, you can no longer hide the truth from yourself or your deeper desires for a union that is based in ALL grounds of mind, body, heart, and soul. These SCARED unions, or those based in more codependent frequencies than health, are getting shaken up as the grounds that used to allow them to continue (safety, comfort, inner parent and child hookups) are flooded with PURE love from the sacred union templates and guides, Divine Source, and those of us in human form exploring and embodying this sacred union ground. Again, we can support you in SoulFullHeart to walk out the completion of the scared union, to claim your SELF, to deepen the process of healing SELF, to overflow self love….
These completions of scared unions can happen rapidly right now where the inertia of the previous years is dissolved away in the frequencies of PURE love. A soul that has been awakening and a heart that has been healing just vibrates too high to remain in the stuck, lower frequency ground anymore of a relationship where their partner is not coming with them into awakening and healing. This higher vibration (Often sought out alone by the awakening mate or ‘outside’ the relationship) starts to flood the relationship and either transforms it into something new, or collapses it.
These sacred union codes are an invitation to move into a ‘next place’ of evolution for our species, where we experience moving from a wounded “I” to a healthy “I” to more and more a “We”. Sacred union offers the remembrance of this ground, of the unity consciousness we know as higher selves and our soul fractals/guides know too. It is a remembrance AND it is a new discovery too, as we heal our emotional bodies in NEW ways in this modern age that allow for a deeper and healthier transaction ground within union. Inviting into MORE love, with self and with other and where other becomes self and yet IS separate too in a delicious dance of conscious duality. ❤
Jelelle Awen is an emoto-spiritual teacher, sacred feminine facilitator, soul scribe, waySHOWer, galactic love ambassador, and co-creator and teacher of the SoulFullHeart Way Of Life. She is author of  Keep Waking Up! Awakening Journeys To Avalon And Beyond and an upcoming book, Sacred Human, Arising Wonder. Visit for more information about space holding sessions, group calls, videos, community, etc. Visit our patreon page to offer a money donation to support our offerings at

Sharing Energies Of A Sacred Union

By Jelelle Awen


New openings, timelines collapsing WITH love….as that is the only way they DO or CAN collapse! Somehow I KNEW this yet today I am experiencing it deeply and profoundly and so tenderly within myself and WITH my relationship WITH Raphael too. Some storms blew in, old timeline energies, and we were with this together, letting some parts of us come up to that needed to AND love held the space as it always does with us as it is more TRUE and real than the conflict.

Right now, not many words, just wanted to share the energy with you of a sacred union that continues to open out into deeper frequencies of true UNION, where we are deliciously separate yet more ‘in’ and ‘with’……this sense that LOVE is the bigger truth has always been there with us, from our earliest days together, and just deepening now….even as sometimes we live into the timeline of letting go and completing. BOTH can happen at the same time in this ground of individuals who are healing and working with parts of themselves and then coming together in ‘usness’, not to cling, not in binds….but to be joined by the bonds of love and growth.

I WISH this experience of sacred union in ALL grounds of heart, body, mind, and soul for all the women in my heart right now that I am honored to serve with love in session space and those that are in my orbit or energy, feeling into a deeper connection. I WISH this for all the men too and I offer service from a heart that is LIVING this to help show the way, just temporarily, as the remembrance of the possibility becomes YOUR reality too more and more.

Jelelle Awen is an emoto-spiritual teacher, sacred feminine facilitator, soul scribe, waySHOWer, galactic love ambassador, and co-creator and teacher of the SoulFullHeart Way Of Life. She is author of  Keep Waking Up! Awakening Journeys To Avalon And Beyond and an upcoming book, Sacred Human, Arising Wonder. Visit for more information about space holding sessions, group calls, videos, community, etc. Visit our patreon page to offer a money donation to support our offerings at

Digesting Post Traumatic Reactions Stored In The Emotional Body

By Jelelle Awen
Yesterday, while Raphael and I were out sitting at a cafe, I thought I saw a woman from my past. In the immediate sense that this MIGHT be her, I felt a knot of anxiety and tension in my third chakra or solar plexus area flare up. After confirming with Raphael that it wasn’t this woman, who I will call “Jane”, I felt the tension move out my field replaced by a sense of calm and love.
In digesting my response to seeing who I thought was Jane, I gave my solar plexus some loving energy as I felt into what the reaction had been. Jane was once a very close friend of mine, true soul family and sister. Almost ten years ago, we were both part of a spiritual and emotional healing group for close to five years together. The same group for which Raphael and I met and eventually left together. I left the group in a highly intense way, after receiving a choice from Daniel – the leader of the group and a man who was like my surrogate father – to either break up with Raphael for a year or leave the group as we were deemed too codependent to be together in a healthy way. This choice was given to me after only three weeks of dating and years of me being in the group within the inner circle and serving as a facilitator of the work for a few years too.
It was a very difficult decision on one end yet, also, my soul was guiding me that it was time to leave this setting which had brought so much love and healing to my life but for which much of it I had outgrown. I heard a strong “No more” in my head which I feel now was my higher self and my guides. I said ‘no’ to the frequencies of control, power OVER those in the group, the gossiping and competition amongst those in the facilitator circle. I said ‘yes’ to my own sovereignty and my choice to explore relationship with Raphael, a man who felt like the deepest mate of heart, soul, and body that I had been desiring for many years. When I left the group, none of the people who I felt to be soul family would or could talk with me any longer.
Jane and I were living together at the time of this dissolution with the group and it was very awkward. We tried to have a friendship ‘outside’ of the group, but she was still very much involved and wouldn’t listen to my growing clarities about the shadow frequencies within it. The separation with her and her disapproval of me was so challenging for me to digest when we had experienced so much love together. Eventually, we went our separate ways, with love, and with her choice to continue in the group. We haven’t spoken in over nine years even as the group fell apart two years ago with Daniel finally being called out for his behaviors by all those in the group.
I am sharing this story, I believe, because it was interesting to feel how even though consciously I have reconciled this experience, my emotional and energy body still held trauma from it. I connected with this energy in my solar plexus last night (and the nasal congestion that came up too) and also cut any karmic bind cords with Jane and yet sent her love too in case it was the Universe telling me that she was thinking of me. In my experience serving others, this is how our emotional and energy bodies work…they store undigested pain in this way, as pockets that release when they are triggered to release (what Carl Jung called ‘being constellated’). We can trigger them to release through consciously connecting with the part of us that holds this energy as we offer and hold space for in SouLFullHeart.
Ultimately, I feel gratitude for my experience in this group and my experience with Jane especially as I trust that our souls signed up for it and it brought me so many gifts of realization around heart-based leadership that invites others into and respects their sovereignty, which is the place I come from related to SoulFullHeart. This group also introduced me to the emotional body, parts work, and the importance of healing at this deep emotional level. Because of the dark night I experienced in leaving the group and ‘losing’ all of my soul family connections that I had at the time, I appreciate the connections that I have with others now in a much deeper way. And, my bond with Raphael was instantly solidified and strengthened by our moving through the trauma of leaving together and we really had no ‘choice’ but to be completely vulnerable with other. This experience also helped me work and heal karmic patterns around rejection, being dominated, dominating others (I connected with my inner Daniel part at some point), shadow side of spirituality, authority, etc.
If you find yourself in or are digesting having been in a relationship with some of these frequencies (and this can happen in romantic and family relationships too, usually what is called the empath and narcissist relationship), it takes time to heal and recover from them for sure and much inner strength and soul resolve to complete them. In fact, ‘time’ doesn’t really exist to these places of trauma as it is stored in the emotional body which doesn’t relate to time. The feeling and connecting with these places through negotiation with the protector part that is protecting them can lead to much movement, growth, and healing with lots of self love and care. Held in a container of love, the lessons are integrated and the tensions are moved with much transformation and deeper embodiment of the higher self.
We can offer support to those of you going through this kind of situation in personal relationship or in recovery from a group through SoulFullHeart space holding sessions. More about that here:
Jelelle Awen is an emoto-spiritual teacher, sacred feminine facilitator, soul scribe, wayshower, multidimensional bridge, lover of love and co-creator and teacher of SoulFullHeart Way Of Life. She is author of  Keep Waking Up! Awakening Journeys To Avalon And Beyond and an upcoming book, Sacred Human, Arising Wonder. Visit for more information about space holding sessions with her, group calls, videos, community, etc.

WITH You: Poem Celebrating Sacred Union

By Jelelle Awen


WITH you, I feel the female, the feminine expression, the yin vibration
that activates in response to YOU

WITH you, I taste what ‘can and could be’ for ALL sacred unions, the potential and capacity of this magical dance

WITH you, I span to the stars, touching galaxies again, returning to my cosmic roots

WITH you, I feel SO cherished for the human woman I have chosen to BE AND for the vast SOUL that I AM

WITH you, I am desired in every arising form, in every change, in every transmutation that moves through me AS me

WITH you, I remember that I cannot be alone yet have chosen separation in order to experience this dance of duality

WITH you, I find ME….in the flow of our USness, I remember that we are ONE and yet not the same

Jelelle Awen….for Raphael Awen
Jelelle Awen is an emoto-spiritual teacher, sacred feminine facilitator, soul scribe, wayshower, multidimensional bridge, lover of love and co-creator and teacher of SoulFullHeart Way Of Life. She is author of  Keep Waking Up! Awakening Journeys To Avalon And Beyond and an upcoming book, Sacred Human, Arising Wonder. Visit for more information about space holding sessions with her, group calls, videos, community, etc.

The Tug of Love


You desire, wish, and sometimes physically ache for Love with another

It is encoded in our human heart and every cell in our body

But to call on Love is to call on You

To be ready, but not prepared, to show up for all that arises in each moment

For there is no planning true love

The fire of this passion and want can be met with meeting that INside

The swirling cauldron of your own Self Lover´s Love

Along with the fear that it is actually on its way

And the fear that it may never show up

It is all part of the terrifyingly majestic dance

That enters your world without warning and sets you ablaze

To find yourself opening up the hiding places

The ones only you visited or never knew existed.  

It can be a tug of war this tug of Love

This precarious tightrope of exalted dizzying heights

At the edge of what lies under the chasm of complete unknowing

The difference between falling and flying

Is how much you trust in your own ability to let it in

And give it out

The courage to see yourself in your Glory as well as your Fury

To trust that Love kNOWs better and everything that you thought yourself to be

Will no longer BE the same.  

As you have the chance to experience something Rarified


…and Intensified by your own willingness to surrender to its calling.  


Gabriel Heartman is a teacher, facilitator, energy healer, writer, poet, and heartist with the SoulFullHeart Way of Life.  You can learn more about him at

When Your Mate And Other Relationships Aren’t Awakening With You: Sacred Feminine Blog Series

By Jelelle Awen


She is expanding, growing, learning. Each drop of remembered kNOWledge waters the seed of her sacred human self and she so WANTS to grow now. Looking and searching for resonance to mirror her growing sense of soul, she needs the NEW reflection to transform into the NEW her that is waiting, spring loaded to become WHO she REALLY is.

She aches for MORE….more love, more light, more growth, more newness, more connection, more intimacy, more joy, more passion, more realness, more authenticity, more health. She feels this desire for MORE most of her moments and the ways and means to suppress it with distractions are not working as well as they used to. The part of her that wants to protect her from pain and keep her safe TRYS to suppress the wanting and the growing, yet THAT doesn’t seem to be working in the ways that it used to anymore.

Her friends, her family, her mate…they are watching this transformation as witnesses who, on a soul level ‘signed up’ to witness it. Maybe they are uneasy about it. Maybe they are resistant about it. Maybe they are inspired by it. Maybe they are coming along. Maybe they are not.

Oh, and her mate….if he is not feeling the same stirrings and call of healing the heart and awakening the soul, her heart aches to share this WITH him. Staying on her side in moments (let it arise in him through him) and then venturing over onto HIS side again (please come with me!) and back and forth. This is an uneasy dance with it can feel like no easy answers with neither partner doing anything wrong or BEing wrong.

As the dance plays out, she may reach a place where she can no longer ‘shrink’ to the old dynamic ground in the relationship to be with him. The place where they used to ‘meet’ each other has literally collapsed through her own growth and this has CHANGED the ground of their ‘usness’….the third energy created when two people come together in mateship. The usness has shifted from wherever it was when they agreed to BE together as it is based on energy and NOT an actual contract at all.

She may reach this place of not being able to allow the dynamic anymore in a dramatic sweep of realization that leads to immediate changes and transitions and completions. She may reach this in small increments and through negotiations with self and with him along the way. Through this negotiation maybe he WILL come along because it is his time and his desire to be and do so. OR he cannot and yet…..on she moves because now her growth cannot be contained without staying in suffering or in a lower frequency EVEN as love remains.

This is written for and inspired by women I have connected with through SoulFullHeart recently in this situation, finding (and ultimately choosing on the soul level) themselves HERE….in this place of awakening while their mate doesn’t seem to be coming along with them. I feel how this situation can be reversed too, with the man awakening and the woman choosing to remain in the same consciousness frequency….yet it feels to me that most often it happens in this way as yin has tended to lead in these grounds.

Drawing this situation is a reflection of the woman to look into herself. It is an invitation to feel how her mate’s (and those in other relationships) lack of resonance reflects a shadow aspect of herself that is ALSO not in resonance with her growth, a part of her that may resist awakening, or is very afraid of it. If she is deciding to stay within the relationship even without the deeper soul resonance and even perhaps outward resistance and maybe even abusive frequencies, then there IS a part(s) of her that feels the same way for which his lack of resonance represents. Without access to these parts of herself, she will make it about the outside, about him, about others RATHER than about herself for which they are just a reflection. Focusing on the outside in this way leads to disempowerment feelings and more sense of suffering and impotence.

She is not a victim but rather willing participant in this dance until she no longer chooses to be. Going within to find the parts of her that are represented here is the way to access her inner power, to feel possible next steps and choices, to navigate from HER side.

Living within a relationship with mutual resonance of body, heart, and soul with Raphael for close to nine years has filled my woman’s heart with loved UPness, compassion and I can template a NEW way for women to experience themselves within a sacred union ground. And a new way to relate to themselves for which ALL aspects of themselves (even those in shadow) are held and explored with a loving curiosity and tenderness WITH internal boundary setting also happening when it is needed.

There is a NEW way of 5D relationship in which their mate is inspiring them to grow, supporting ALL of their movements which support their soul, and which love becomes more and more pure between the two partners as they dedicate themselves to their inner healing and soul awakening. Often what people feel is ‘love’ in romantic relationship is actually a sticky, codependent frequency of need from one part of them to another part in their mate (example, inner child in the woman hooked up with the patriarch in the man, the matriarch in the woman hooked up with the inner child in the man, inner punishers in both hooked up together.)

It is a complicated dynamic and yet love will steer through it if there is willingness to feel, to heal, to grow, and to be REAL with what the emotional reality actual IS and the degree of suffering over suffering exists from inside. No more suffering becomes the motivation for change until love leads the way more and more with suffering becoming a rarer occurrence. It IS possible to experience this PURE love ground in relationships to the degree it is happening from within, from inside, from one aspect to another.

If you are a woman in this situation, you may need someone to hold space for this process of going within, accessing these aspects of yourself, and I would be honored to serve love with you in this process as it was my own in the past. Go here to read more about that: I know that Raphael Awen would be honored to serve the male side of the relationship (or if the situation is reversed.):

Jelelle Awen is an emoto-spiritual teacher, soul scribe, wayshower, multidimensional bridge, lover of love and co-creator and facilitator of SoulFullHeart Way Of Life. She is author of Keep Waking Up! Awakening Journeys To Avalon And Beyond and an upcoming book, Sacred Human, Arising Wonder. Visit for more information about space holding sessions with her, group calls, videos, community, etc.

Celebrating Eight Years Of Sacred Union Experience

By Jelelle Awen


Eight years ago, I joined my intention to his….in the moment and for all moments that followed that would be in mutual desire and resonance. On some level, it all felt like a whirlwind….started dating in July and married by March (after knowing each other for a couple of years) having already moved through two major geography changes finally JUST settling in Canada when we married. And, the collapse of our whole social and spiritual world by leaving (being asked to leave, told to leave or not be together because we were deemed to ‘codependent’ although only together three weeks!) the spiritual group we had both been part of for three and four years.

Our courtship was the highest highs of desire moving through, my body calibrating to what it feels like to REALLY be wanted by a man and my heart letting in what it feels like to REALLY be cherised by a man. AS I was also going through a dark night of letting go of ALL the souls I had been close to for more than five years in the group. Ups and downs, bittersweet, and yet, always was he there for me, over and over, in complete devotion and utter eagerness to be together.

Those ups and downs have settled over the years as we found our way together through many changes and transitions yet, always, arising our way through it in union. We took our wedding rings off last year, feeling like it had been other parts of us (going by our birth names Wayne and Jillian) who had exchanged those rings even as the core of us was there. We felt so different after years of parts work, being in the crucible of sacred union together that had burnt away so many layers, letting go of incomes and geographies and just about everything there was to let go of other than each other.

We even felt that the significance of this day was a memory from the past and we were arising in the NOW together. Yet, I do feel in my heart a tenderness for this day, this anniversary, and where we were at that time and who we have been through the years and who we are arising into now as Raphael and Jelelle.

Our usness keeps expanding as we do and keeps vibrating at a higher frequency at all levels and in all areas – sexually, emotionally, spiritually. We are more and more connecting other lifetimes together (energizing NOW) such as in Atlantis (a couple of those) and also our star BEing aspects. Very little conflict between us, fewer words needed, more soul connection…

I feel we are counterpart souls to each other, which I prefer to the twin flame paradigm. I will be writing more about this in the future as it digests and arises for me and as I experience it deepen with Raphael. I can feel how our relationship could feel like a fantasy or idealized, yet it is not, it IS very real, and we have had to go through the dark together to illuminate the light and the love yet that was always there. We have had to commit to awakening and to our own personal process OVER everything else, including the relationship. The goodness overflow in a relationship can only deepen and grow if the partners are committed to their OWN growth first.

Being my counterpart, Raphael is like me yet NOT me and it is the beautiful blend of masculine and feminine that offers SUCH growth and mirror for our own inner union.

So I celebrate a love today that I am SO BLESSED to experience and have been so blessed to experience for these 8.5 years…..thank you to Raphael Awen my king, my BEloved, my cocreator, my love for sharing this life of serving love together.

Photo was taken on our wedding day eight years ago in a small studio apartment in West Vancouver….Ah newlyweds, although we are STILL like this!

By Raphael Awen

3 countries, 5 cities, a couple towns and and year and a half on an off grid ranch. Those are are bit of the outward journey of my 8 year marriage with Jelelle Awen. And it hasn’t stopped by any means…

Today is our 8 year anniversary! Happy Anniversary Beloved.

We didn’t set out to choose change for change sake, but rather to choose love and showing up for the rigours of relationship. At the outset, we knew the idea of hiding in any kind of ‘long distance relationship’ was not a question for us and that meant choosing between 2 countries, 2 career paths, etc. from the beginning. The epic choices to continually choose deepening love and to let go of the barriers to love continued, and continue to unfold right in this moment.

The place for settling and the need for some predictability have been met internally, rather than externally. Through finding, feeling and healing parts of ourselves who hold our resistance to love, we both have found a way, individually to live inside of a settled heart of love for ourselves, that only then are able to transact freely and deeply with each other. Quite surprisingly, this has made the external changes and choices arise quite naturally and navigably (if that’s a word). Even with me getting banned from the US at the border in 2009 and having to change our plans on a dime was met with a grace and a way through. We didn’t ‘have to’ leave country and career behind again in 2014, but the awareness was that another epic choice was right for us individually and as a couple. Our soul purpose deepening individually and our greatest adventure as a couple we knew lay in that choice. It was up to us. We could take it or leave it. We took it, and there hasn’t’ been a single regret.

We also knew from the outset and still know that we couldn’t make any kind of commitment to one another to ‘be there for each other no matter what.’ We couldn’t guarantee that then for each other and we don’t attempt that now. Our commitment to each other is predicated on our commitment to ourselves first.

I honour and celebrate this magical unfolding this day and every day as much as I am able. And, truth be told, and truth be tolled, it’s a tall order, and one I’m very glad to be tasked with…🙂

Happy Anniversary Beloved…


Jelelle Awen is an emoto-spiritual teacher, soul scribe, wayshower, multidimensional bridge, lover of love and co-creator and facilitator of SoulFullHeart Way Of Life. She is author of Keep Waking Up! Awakening Journeys To Avalon And Beyond and an upcoming book, Becoming The NEW 5D Sacred Human. Visit for more information about space holding sessions with her, group calls, videos, community, etc.

A Heart-On For Sacred Romance


Okay. So that was a little provocative.  That´s alright.  It was meant to be.  I feel like there is something in the masculine that wants to push some boundaries.  Get a little rise…sort of speak.  So some inner teenager gets to come out and play a little bit.  That is all part of the fun of self-discovery and exploration.  On the road to the Men´s group call on Saturday I felt compelled to feel into some writing about the masculine and was guided to just write about what is in my space as a man in the moment.  

It is a time of stoking the fire of romance.  Feeling what that really means as a man.  So much is written from a female’s perspective about romance and the desire to be in deep union.  For me, it is a new way of wanting to relate to relationship and union.  In my past I can feel how there were many unfelt and unhealed energies in my emotional body that made it difficult for me to be vulnerable.  To get into the messy of what was real.  Just wanting to be in a comfort place even if it really wasn´t comfortable.  Those days are no longer as I have been on a healing path for over 5 years now and feel way more Me here than I ever have.  A self-love that is wanting to overflow to another.

I feel that deep down all men want this too.  As vibrations are raising and Love showering down on us every moment, we can´t help but to feel this draw and desire.  To leave the old conditioning and patterns behind.  There is a need in the core of our soul to want to grow and expand.  It can happen at great depth on one´s own, but there is nothing like romance to turn on the afterburners and propel us into the reflection of some of our hidden places.  Now, don´t get me wrong.  I feel resistance from a part of me around that, but it is met with more desire to be vulnerable to that and let it work itself out in relationship.  Scars and all.  

There is an experience of life and ourselves as men that we just cannot have unless we are in a romance.  I really believe there is a phase we all find ourselves in when we have been hurt and just need the solo time.  But I don´t feel we were meant to be that way for long, unless the soul signed up for it.  I still feel in our human heart we want to feel transactable love with each other on a ground that is ever expanding and never stagnant.  The resistance to it comes from a protective part of us that has a very good reason for feeling the way it does.

Romantic love turns your world upside down. We just know that on some level and that is scary.  I have been beautifully upended twice in my life that found me making changes and feeling things a part of me never thought I would.  In the words of Kalayna Colibri, it ¨rearranges your furniture¨…and then moves your house to a different country altogether.  Your inner house gets lit up and some of the things you didn´t know were there or were hiding become highlighted.

In SoulFullHeart we see ourselves working our vertical self, the me to me, first.  Then there is the transactable horizontal ground between a man and a woman that we call the Usness.  This is the juicy place of all sorts of magic, emotionally, spiritually, and sexually.  This is the Merkabah that is created between two hearts and souls that can traverse galaxies and back again.  The kind of after-glow that can leave you in a fuzz for days.

I long for this kind of relationship.  I know that it is not all honeymoon but a concerted desire to be with all that comes up personally and in response to another.  It is an alchemical ground that offers so much in way of a true aliveness of being.  I feel there are other men that long for the same and the road there is through your own heart.  Though this was written from a single man´s perspective I feel those that are in current relationships can feel this in their own dynamic with their beloveds. What is it that we truly desire in our hearts and in romance with another?  

To my Queen, wherever you may find yourself, this was dedicated to you.   

Gabriel Heartman is a teacher, facilitator, energy healer, writer, poet, and heartist with the SoulFullHeart Way of Life.  You can learn more about him at


Five Reasons Why It Is Challenging To Set Healthy boundaries

By Jelelle Awen

The process of boundary setting and perhaps taking space in relationship or breaks is an important one related to our ascension process and arisement of our 5D self as every relationship we are in is an energy exchange. It is a key aspect of growing and arising into our soul self as every energy we engage with is a reflection of us. This process of sorting through relationships and setting and BEing boundaries is an aspect of the transition and awakening into your 4D self.

I feel setting a healthy boundary with someone in a relationship as being about the sense that we can no longer be in relationship with them or we need space from the relationship because it isn’t healthy or self loving for us to remain or because we just don’t have the reSOULance value ground to BE in relationship any longer (even as love remains). A ‘porous’ boundary would be one that is open to being changed if the person changes or if the ground of the relationship becomes healthier through inner healing work, soul awakenings, or shifts and choices that happen.

Every boundary has a door, just as every fence has a gate. Healthy boundary setting can be done with an open heart, with love and compassion for both the person and ourselves, and before the relationship reaches high levels of toxicity or codependency that is harmful to both sides. This is challenging in our culture, however, and most people struggle a lot with this and how to BE with it.

Why is it so challenging to set boundaries with people in relationships, even when the level of abuse and toxicity is obvious to us? There are many possible answers to this question that could be applied in a universal way even as every individual situation is different.

1) One of the reasons it is so challenging to set and BE in healthy boundaries is because most of us received no modeling on how to do or be this with our caregivers AND we weren’t ‘allowed’ to set any boundaries with our families prior to adulthood.

We are such sponges, absorbing all the energies and emotional tones of our families as we grow up. By the time we are teenagers, we are so filled up with these tones and energies that part of us begins to rebel against what we had no choice in absorbing, which is a form of boundary setting. Some of us continue this rebellion until adulthood and eventually our boundary setting with family may end up being a complete push away or break from them for a phase of time or for life. Most of us are not invited to set boundaries with our family members and we wouldn’t anyway because of our food and shelter needs that they provide.

3D conditioning is that we are required to deal with whatever we are given or however we are treated without advocating or defending ourselves and without the opportunity to say, ‘No’. So, we learn how to live with what we inherited and the cost to the expression of our authentic self and the development of the ability to set boundaries out of self love is hugely impacted. Basically, we literally have ‘no idea’ how to set healthy boundaries because we didn’t ‘see’ and ‘learn’ how to do it from our families.

2) This leads into the second reason, which is that we don’t have enough self love or core self worth to lead this navigation of boundary setting. In SoulFullHeart work, core self worth is something that emerges after much processing with the parts of us who don’t find us worthy and yet are tasked with protecting and defending us, such as our inner punisher-critic, our controller-protector, our inner matriarch-patriarch, etc. These parts of us have developed as internal voices and energies inside of us because of the energies and tones we took in from our caregivers.

It is actually an aspect of our self-defense structure to develop these parts of us that keep the messages running that we ‘are not worthy of love’ or ‘are unlovable’ or ‘are crazy’ or whatever the message is. These parts are actually trying to keep us safe by knocking us down first before someone else does (which is what happened in childhood) or before we get too ‘big’ and do unsafe things. I know this sounds strange, but over eleven years of working with people in subpersonality work, I have seen this over and over again. And, of course, I have felt this in myself. Without an innate sense of core self worth and self love, it is very difficult to say ‘no’ to unhealthy frequencies. Saying ‘no’ means that we are saying ‘yes’ to what nourishes us and that we feel that we are worth it.

3) Boundary setting can be challenging because we don’t know which ones to set and which part of us is doing it. Sometimes it can feel like we are setting healthy boundaries because part of us has said ‘no’ to something or a relationship and is shutting it out, but it actually IS necessary for us to go into it or it could lead to our next growth place to go into it. Parts of us (the protector-controller again primarily) actually like saying ‘no!’ but it can be misdirected and misplaced. This part of us can say ‘no’ to people who are trying to help us by no longer enabling us or by bringing us a tough truth that we don’t want to see. Or this part of us can say, ‘no’ to changes that we need to make or tough conversations that we need to have that could bring conflict and more changes. So, this can be a confusing ground to navigate and asking, “Which part of me wants this boundary and why?” is a very important one.

4) Boundary setting can make us look ‘bad’ or ‘not nice.’ For the parts of us that care about our self-image or how others perceive us, it can be very uncomfortable if we are judged by the person (or others) that we are setting the boundary with as mean or not nice. We are so conditioned in our culture around ‘being nice’ and that it is a ‘good thing’…..even as most relationships, if you go deeper, have a layer of toxicity and falseness in them that has nothing to do with being ‘nice’. Many people would rather preserve the self image of being nice even with someone who is NOT nice with them and actually treats them badly. This behavior pattern has usually been strongly modeled by one of our parents or both of them.

5) It’s challenging and nearly impossible to set boundaries with others if we haven’t set them with parts of ourselves. This is a crucial aspect of parts process work: learning when to set a boundary with a part of us when we identify and feel that we don’t want their behavior to continue because it is isn’t self loving. We literally have to set a boundary with them as the 5D arising Higher Self sometimes in order to be ‘bigger’ than the part of us. For example, we feel love for the inner punisher even as we set a boundary with this part of us to stop beating us down with self judgments. Or we have to say ‘no’ to certain things which parts of us use to keep us numb to our deeper feelings. Our growing 4D and 5D self learns to do this in a loving way that is both strong and open. When parts of us feel this energy of healthy boundary setting arise in us, they lean into it. They have been waiting for it our whole lives and parts of us become relieved because finally an ‘adult’ is home to say what is nourishing and healthy and what is not.

Boundary setting transforms relationships, either by closing them down for a period of time or by opening them up to something new. In my experience, both sides benefit from healthy and porous boundary setting, even if one side is leading it (which is usually the case.) Boundary setting doesn’t have to be a ‘one time’ thing in relationships with a dramatic declaration and big fallout, although that is often what happens if it hasn’t been done consistently.

In healthy and authentic relationships, boundary setting is something that is being talked about and negotiated, something that just happens organically and, in an intimate relationship, sometimes several times a day. And, it is porous…meaning it shifts and changes based on the current conditions. It can be porous if both people are working on healing their hearts through subpersonality work and if they are dedicated and committed to serving the LOVE in the relationship. And it feels like in relationships that are mostly based in 5D consciousness frequencies, boundary setting is not even necessary as the Oneness connection and soul ground flows between the relationships in most moments.

Letting go of what doesn’t nourish us in relationships (or in ANY area of our lives), allows us to let in what really DOES….it makes space for more LOVE to arise inside of us and in our lives.


Jelelle Awen is an emoto-spiritual teacher, soul scribe, wayshower, multidimensional bridge, lover of love and co-creator and facilitator of SoulFullHeart Way Of Life. She is author of Keep Waking Up! Awakening Journeys To Avalon And Beyond and an upcoming book, Becoming The NEW 5D Sacred Human. Visit for more information about space holding sessions with her, group calls, videos, community, etc.

Our Moonlit Whisper


The time is NOW my love

We have spent much of it in our own healing

Our own internal mating

The rising crescendo of our deepest desire

Is aching to be birthed into each other’s arms

I open my kingdom doors to you, my love

To swim within my transparent sea

My still hidden rooms for which you hold the key

I call upon my elongated passion, my gentle caress,

My wanton curiosity and compassion

To feel what makes a part of you so afraid to love again.

For I have it too, my love

The fear, the resistance, the unknowable consumable fire

But it is in the face of it all that we truly see who we ARE

What we could possibly BE

If we lay down our guard and vulnerably let each other IN

I have felt you near me, with me, on me my love

Your tender and sweetly scented skin

Your courageous and powerful stillness of being

Your greatest gift of Heart to all of Infinite Creation

It is the soul laden majesty of your glistening eyes that had me from the beginning

We are on magical ride of galactic proportions

We are both Here and There

Walking our steps, picking up our lost soul’s fragments

And sewing them into the blanket we will lie on together

For the moments we arise anew and continue to live in our TRUE

Our truest expression of the Love we were meant to explore

For you are the Queen of my Heart, the Portal of my Soul

My love is always with you as I grow and foster my own

Until then, my love, may we dance together in our Moonlit Whisper

Gabriel Heartman is a teacher, facilitator, energy healer, writer, poet, and heartist with the SoulFullHeart Way of Life.  You can learn more about him at