Just Give Up And Give In

Just give up…

Give up the knowing to feeling

Give up the doing to being

Give up the doubting to claiming

Give up the suffering to healing

Don’t give up on the parts of you that still need these to identify with. Feel them in the need to know. Be with them in the push to Do. Claim them when all they can do is doubt. Offer them healing when all they have known is suffering.

Then just give in…

Give in to your delusion of grandeur

Give in to the desire and dream

Give in and surrender to the power of love that aches to bloom

Give in to just being a singularity and embrace your multiplicity.

This is the journey of the human soul. Give it all you got.

*****

Gabriel Heartman is an emoto-spiritual men’s and women’s facilitator, energy healer, writer, poet, and heartist with the SoulFullHeart Way of Life.  Visit https://www.soulfullheartwayoflife.com for more information about space holding sessions, group calls, videos, community, etc.

Visit our website to offer a money donation to support our offerings at https://www.soulfullheartwayoflife/donations.

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Boys Will Be Boys…And Sensitive Too!

This is a question that was asked in response to my recent post about my engagement to Kalayna:

¨I am wondering if uncovering the sensual/sensitive part of the masculine is a deepening in your masculinity and if it is asking you to be more feminine than you are comfortable with?”

This was a very intriguing question to me and one that I feel is a part of any man’s sacred human journey. This journey is an exploration, uncovering, and integration of both poles of our being. These energies are a part of our Divine nature and in search of a dance of balance.

As a boy and young man growing up, I always felt different than many of my other friends when it came to such things as playing sports, construction, conflict, and girls to name a few. My emotional body just seemed different too. A bit more sensitive and was attributed to me being more of a mama’s boy rather than seeing it as a closer relationship to my feminine. So in a way, the sensitive side of my masculinity was always there, just not recognized as such.

As I am connecting more with a feminine part of me, I am beginning to see where she was always trying to be ‘one of the guys’ while not really feeling comfortable with it as it approached the more shadow edges of masculinity. (I prefer not to use the term ‘toxic masculinity’ as that seems to undermine and judge this part of us as bad or unwanted. More on that in a future post). Yet, to ‘fit in’ I assumed many conditioned behaviors to adjust and be more of what was considered a culturally acceptable male.

So, there was a conflict between my traditional masculine part and my feminine part looking for a way to feel safe and authentic in the world. Until this process of differentiating between the two, the conflict was a bit maddening to both of them. Now that I have cultivated a relationship between both of them, I can begin to feel myself as a bridge to them in my daily experience.

I am learning to feel less concerned about how that femininity expresses and how it is perceived. My traditional masculine is learning to feel the gifts of the inner feminine and how much healing and beauty there is in her. My feminine is beginning to feel safer in the outward masculine leadership and the showing up as a masculine presence. There is more to activate in my masculine that I realize has been shielded by my feminine. This is what I feel leads to a deepening of both poles of my being.

Raphael and I will be addressing this and many other topics for men and spiritual ascension in upcoming videos that we hope to begin today. A woman’s perspective is also very much encouraged to give us reflection and direction as well. We look forward to taking in comments and suggestions as we explore this very important topic to both of us, and to help bridge the inner parts exploration with guided meditations.

To hear more about masculine healing check out these videos from Jelelle Awen’s 33 Day series where Raphael and I were guests:

Inner Masculine/Feminine Balance: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=nvi_m4i1KvQ&list=PLNmrHdaQSAvLiLpw1qSOmQE-tsqhGSAD3&index=17&t=0s

Healing The Sacred Masculine: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=X6ueoUK4aDo&index=30&list=PLNmrHdaQSAvLiLpw1qSOmQE-tsqhGSAD3

Photo by Michael Prewett on Unsplash

*****

Gabriel Heartman is an emoto-spiritual men’s and women’s facilitator, energy healer, writer, poet, and heartist with the SoulFullHeart Way of Life.  Visit https://www.soulfullheartwayoflife.com for more information about space holding sessions, group calls, videos, community, etc. Visit our website to offer a money donation to support our offerings at https://www.soulfullheartwayoflife/donations.

The Valentine’s Gateway To The Heart

In the past, prior to my healing journey, Valentine’s Day would give a part of me a little cringe. There was an energy of duty and obligation that swelled up inside whenever I was in a relationship. A feeling that this part of me had to “show up” in a way and be romantic even if he wasn’t totally feeling that.

Of course, there were the Valentines when I would go all out because I was in a new relationship and would get swept up in the collective swell of romanticism. When I wasn’t, another part of me would feel an angst and a bitterness that would demean the day as commercial exploitation. Many other times I could feel an ambivalence inside me as the day would just come and go

As I reflect on that and compare it to where I am now in a conscious sacred union with Kalayna, I can feel how those reactions were portals into my relationship to love, romance, and intimacy. Since it is a collective experience, at least in Western consciousness, a lot can get kicked up in the emotional body for both men and women.

Memories of recent relationships, the status of current relationships, or the longing of future romance amplifies as we experience this as a Whole. The parts of us that were wounded and hurt are triggered at this time. What a great opportunity to feel them in this!

I feel that this is true for both men and women, yet women feel closer to it than many men as we have more of a mechanism to bury or ignore these feelings than women. But I know that men feel a great deal during this time, regardless of what a part of them may say outwardly.

We all have parts of us that relate to this day differently. The inner child exuberance of joy, gifts, and candy, the inner teenager and its tragic romantic conflict and angst, the inner prince that gets to court and woo the inner princess, or the inner matriarch and patriarch that can throw the whole damn thing out the window for that matter!

What do love, romance, and intimacy represent to these different aspects of you? What are the hurt, trauma, yearning, or ambivalence wanting you to feel? To express? Writing a letter to Love is a great way to access this relationship regardless of where you are at. It is a key that can open up doors to the tender parts of you that are awaiting your entry and open heart to feel them in it.

For parts of men, this may feel a bit too feminine, but I encourage you to take a moment to give it a try. If there is a feeling of resistance then maybe writing to that resistance can help grease the wheels.

What does Love mean to you, even if what comes out seems to counter and oppose? Digesting that with another open heart can offer a deeper reflection and pathway to where you ultimately want to go in the arena of romance even if it is just from you to you, as that is where it all begins.

For more on inner and outer sacred union and intimacy check out these videos from Jelelle and Raphael Awen: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=nPVo1iZTYng&feature=share

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=diPaOZFiPBM&feature=share

*****

Gabriel Heartman is an emoto-spiritual men’s and women’s facilitator, energy healer, writer, poet, and heartist with the SoulFullHeart Way of Life.  Visit https://www.soulfullheartwayoflife.com for more information about space holding sessions, group calls, videos, community, etc.

Visit our website to offer a money donation to support our offerings at https://www.soulfullheartwayoflife/donations

The Poultice Of Love And The Fear Of Intimacy

Wow! What a response the last couple of days to our engagement. Thank you so much to everyone who left your well-wishes and congratulations.

One thing I took away from it all is that one way or another we all seek Love. Maybe there are parts that may feel despair, doubt, or indifference to it, but at our core we love Love. The only thing that gets similar reactions is anything based on Fear. So in some ways, we have parts that love Fear too. Yeah, I know, an oxymoron.

This is the sacred dance though. The two poles of our BEing that seem at odds but are just trying to reconcile each other. As we all continue to heal our Selves with Love and for the sake of Love, we enter a new relationship to Fear. Something shifts in the power structure. The deepening commitment and claim of this romance with Kalayna will certainly bring up another layer of this relationship to fear of intimacy. Deep transformational intimacy that takes us to the core of our deepest traumas and pains that can only surface from the poultice of Love.

So the collective response is saying to me, “YES! Keep going! Keep feeling the edges of this because I want this too!” or “YES! Bring more of this into the world as it adds to mine as well!”. Even if Kalayna and I don’t “make it” in the long run, we are committing ourselves to this deeper healing that has collective and personal consequences. “Success” is only determined if we feel everything we to feel and say everything we need to say while we are engaged in this marriage of Soul and Heart. We are bound by this in desire, not duty.

I feel to continue this exploration of marriage, intimacy, love, and fear through the heart of the Masculine. What is its relationship and desire to those very things? Right now it is about being centered in Heart while exploring the Soul in healing the parts of me still in shadow around intimacy with the Feminine. It is a sacred one that I accept with dedication and passion.

If you are a man or a woman with this rising desire in you, stay tuned for more. I am also available for sessions to support you along the journey of this sacred healing and letting in of Love. Thank you so much again for all the outpouring of support and love for us both. ❤

*****

Painting by Eduardo Rodriguez Calzado

Gabriel Heartman is an emoto-spiritual men’s and women’s facilitator, energy healer, writer, poet, and heartist with the SoulFullHeart Way of Life.  Visit https://www.soulfullheartwayoflife.com for more information about space holding sessions, group calls, videos, community, etc. Visit our website to offer a money donation to support our offerings at https://www.soulfullheartwayoflife/donations.

Sacred Feminine Healing W/Divine Mother Guided Meditation – DAY 28: 33 DAYS DEEPEN W/ Jelelle Awen & Kalayna Colibri (VIDEO)

DAY TWENTY-EIGHT: DEEPEN 33 Day Video Series – Sacred Feminine Healing W/Divine Mother Guided Meditation W/Jelelle Awen & Kalayna Colibri

This is day twenty-eight of 33 in my daily video series called Deepen. In today’s video, SoulFullHeart Facilitator Kalayna Colibri joins me to talk about sacred feminine healing for women. As I’ve been offering in this video series, there are key areas of self exploration that can lead to the arising of your sacred femininity. We talk about how individuation from your birth mother templating and working with your Inner Mother is a key aspect of this. Another important self love exploration is with your sacred sexuality, your Yoni space, and clearing of sexual trauma and abuse frequencies from this life and other lives.

Discovering what the feminine is in authentic expression is also about feeling into what isn’t feminine, yet rather wounded masculine expression. This comes forward through expression of usually masculine parts such as the Inner Protector, Gatekeeper, Inner Punisher, who heal into healthy masculine frequencies of guidance, right action, discernment, ability to set boundaries etc. The healing of your wounded feminine in forms such as your Inner Child and Inner Teenager is also an important aspect of moving into wholeness of integrated feminine expression.

In the meditation today, Kalayna leads us into an exploration of a sacred feminine healing circle through experience of Divine Mother frequencies. Kuan Yin, Mother Mary, Mary Magdalene, Sophia, and Dark Mother join you to connect their healing frequencies with yours. Your wounded feminine parts and masculine Protectors also come into the circle to receive Divine Feminine love.

Thank you for joining us on this twenty-eighth day of 33….as we move into Deepening energies together…..one beloved part of us at a time!

More about parts/Metasoul aspects here: soulfullheartwayoflife.com/parts

You can watch all the videos in the series here: https://www.youtube.com/playlist…

I will be hosting a group session over Zoom to digest your experience during this series for a $11 USD minimum. The next one will be on Saturday, February 2nd at 11:00am PST. More info here: https://www.facebook.com/events/2189383564650970/

You are welcome to share your experiences of this guided meditation here on FB and I will respond to your sharings.

Jelelle Awen
1:1 bridging and ongoing sessions available with me for women over 25 and with other SoulFullHeart Facilitators (Gabriel and Raphael with women/men and Kalayna with woman 25 and under) to deepen this connection with your Protector, Inner Child, Lemurian, and other precious parts/Metasoul aspects! More info here:soulfullheartwayoflife.com/sessions

 

 

 

Connect To Your Yoni/Lingam Sacred Sexuality Healing Guided Meditation – DAY 27: 33 DAYS DEEPEN W/ Jelelle Awen (VIDEO)

DAY TWENTY-SEVEN: DEEPEN 33 Day Video Series – Connect To Your Yoni/Lingam Sacred Sexuality Healing Guided Meditation W/Jelelle Awen

 

This is day twenty-seven of 33 in my daily video series called Deepen. In today’s video, I talk about the ‘yoni/sexual area’ as a portal for women and men. The Yoni doesn’t just include the female genitalia, yet also the root/sacral/solar plexus chakras as well. Connecting with yoni honors the sacredness of your sexual energies and allows for digestion of sexual partner experiences you’ve taken in. For men, the lingam recognizes more than just male genitalia (which can so be the focus), yet the lower chakras as well as a penetrating and powerful energy of sacred masculinity as it heals.

I offer that working with your yoni (or lingam for men) as a part of you opens you up to more of your sacred sexual energies that are often suppressed, blocked, or overly energized. It creates a tender space of self-love based healing to clear out previous sexual experiences from this life and from other timelines as well, which can be stored in the yoni especially. This allows for more healthy and nourishing (and satisfying!) sexual experience with a partner.

In the meditation today, Divine Feminine guides Mother Mary and Mary Magdalene invite you to join them in connection with your yoni (or lingam.) You go to a clearing and cleansing ‘purity’ pool to dip into the waters of love. You connect with the cries and tears of your yoni or lingam, feeling into each partner you have had this life. Then, you receive loving energies from both Marys to provide soothing digestion as you get a sense of what it would feel like to embody your innocent sexuality and your pure sensuality.

Here is a video of Raphael and I talking about sacred union and sacred sexuality: https://youtu.be/diPaOZFiPBM

The writing that I suggest doing to deepen this connection is about writing a letter to your yoni and have your yoni write back to you. Men can do this as well. Then have your yoni write to you about every partner you’ve had and how she feels about them.

Thank you for joining me on this twenty-seventh day of 33….as we move into Deepening energies together…..one beloved part of us at a time!

More about parts/Metasoul aspects here: soulfullheartwayoflife.com/parts

You can watch each video in the Deepen playlist on my SoulFullHeart Experience You Tube Channel here: https://www.youtube.com/playlist…

I will be hosting a group session over Zoom to digest your experience during this series for a $11 USD minimum. The next one will be on Saturday, February 2nd at 11:00am PST. More info here: https://www.facebook.com/events/2189383564650970/

You are welcome to share your experiences of this guided meditation here on FB and I will respond to your sharings.

Jelelle Awen
1:1 bridging and ongoing sessions available with me for women over 25 and with other SoulFullHeart Facilitators (Gabriel and Raphael with women/men and Kalayna with woman 25 and under) to deepen this connection with your Protector, Inner Child, Lemurian, and other precious parts/Metasoul aspects! More info here:soulfullheartwayoflife.com/sessions

 

 

 

Ascension Energies Amplify And Support Inner Masculine Healing

This inner quest continues. The quest of the masculine to get to know itself. I use the pronoun “it” to denote an energy rather than a gender. This quest is fueled by curiosity and desire. Not a need to overcome, master, or fix. It wants to feel its power, its strength, and courage. It also knows there is the shadow to look at in response to that.

Recently there has been a mainstream appeal to what is being labeled as “traditional” or “toxic” masculinity and its effect on society. This is receiving praise as much as it is receiving ire. There is a masculine voice within some men that defends against a notion it is responsible for the ills of the world. It feels attacked and judged for the actions of certain individuals.

I can feel where this is true coming from a particular perspective, from this part I should say. As we are becoming more aware of what has been happening in the darkest parts of our collective, there is a rumbling that is occurring. There is a network of voices that are coming out to join forces against a very institutional, subtle, and not so subtle, part of our society. The wounded masculine is getting a light shined on it and it is very uncomfortable.

The reactions can come as far as saying that there is a war on men and that boys are going to be turned into weak and feckless adults. When I hear that all I can feel is this masculine’s judgment toward the feminine. Yes, I can see where boys and men are not inhabiting their power and are in need of heart-open initiation that offers them power WITH the feminine and not OVER the feminine. No, we are not all bad guys, but we have unconscious habits and perspectives that do need authentic and curious exploration if we are going to evolve as a society.

This rush to defense, to me, signifies a soul wound that is in deep protection. I think there is a legitimate caution to not create a generalization that takes us in some polarized reaction. I am not “one of those guys”, but I do know as part of the collective male/masculine psyche I do have things to feel into and uncover within myself. That is the next level for all of us to consider when we talk about ascension and healing. It is not a blame game, but a deep and serious look at what is at play underneath our hoods. This is equally true for women.

My desire is to create a healthy dialogue and personal invitation to what this exploration may reveal about ourselves and our nature as men. It is to take us into a new relationship with our masculinity AND our feminity. This is what I feel we are being offered by Love in all Its energy fluxes and activations. This is the year of the arising sacred masculine within all of us.

*****

Gabriel Heartman is an emoto-spiritual men’s and women’s facilitator, energy healer, writer, poet, and heartist with the SoulFullHeart Way of Life.  Visit https://www.soulfullheartwayoflife.com for more information about space holding sessions, group calls, videos, community, etc.

Visit our website to offer a money donation to support our offerings at https://www.soulfullheartwayoflife/donations.

The Quest For Soul

I am not sure if every man (or woman’s masculine) feels the draw for a quest, but I can feel that desire inside of me. I remember my friends and I played all sorts of games that sparked the imagination and sent us to far off lands, both fantastically and galactically. Of course, there was always a battle where we would arise victoriously or fall in defeat.

However, the shift has turned inward. The outer battles getting old and tired. The fantasy turned to a hardened reality. I chose to go on a new quest where I wanted to end the battles within and find the pot of gold at the end of the rainbow. What I have learned is that the quest IS the pot of gold.

There is an epic world and story inside of us comprised of conditioning, beliefs, and experiences that have formed our current perception and feelings toward ourselves and Other. These energies are held as players in our Grand Play. We get to go back to the playground of our youth and use that free imagination to re-member our selves back into Wholeness. However, this quest is full of facing our deepest wounds and our darkest sides, in many realms of our interdimensional existence.

We are not out to battle them, defeat them, or deal with our “shit”. We are meant to outfit ourselves with the power of Love and go find these wounded, scared, angry, and powerful parts of ourselves. They are the real target of our INtentions. We go find their stories and see how they have manifested themselves in our lives. It is a real-life soap opera right inside of us. Though the point is to heal the suffering and eventually end the long-running show.

You are much grander and joyful than you may be currently feeling in this current consciousness. Turning the gaze and quest inward is a remarkable journey that, when leaned into and deepened, can provide the Next Level of your passion, purpose, and both inner and outer romance. As we each make our way, we all make our way.
******

If you have not taken in Jelelle Awen’s 33 Day series, I would highly recommend it. It is the springboard for your own inner quest. It is better than Netflix because you are the writer, director, and star of the show. It can provide a lot of awareness to what may have been hidden or just plain afraid to face. As you follow the journey there will be checkpoints along the way to digest all you have taken in. There are two group meetings over Zoom scheduled for Janurary 12 and February 2. You can access this series on her page or on our YouTube channel here:
https://www.youtube.com/playlist?list=PLNmrHdaQSAvLiLpw1qSOmQE-tsqhGSAD3&fbclid=IwAR0TxtgJfEYn206g83GiaCFctfCk0Z10XxTS0DUPM670JIJZYUpW83IaTHI

*****

Gabriel Heartman is an emoto-spiritual men’s and women’s facilitator, energy healer, writer, poet, and heartist with the SoulFullHeart Way of Life.  Visit https://www.soulfullheartwayoflife.com for more information about space holding sessions, group calls, videos, community, etc.

Visit our website to offer a money donation to support our offerings at https://www.soulfullheartwayoflife/donations.

New Year Energies Offer New Relationship Within

“It is not freedom from pain,suffering, or despair that you seek, but rather a relationship to it.”

This is a reiteration of a message I received last year at this time that has come back to illuminate itself to me once more. In working with others and recalling my own past movements, there were pivotal moments where the merging with the heavy and the dark seemed almost inescapable. We were one.

Fortunately, I had an other heart and soul that stayed connected to me energetically so that I could have the courage and lifeline to just stay one ounce bigger than the feeling itself. It was not about transcending it but rather holding and relating to it as an aspect of myself, one that just felt like it was me.

I just had the beautiful blessing to offer that to another through email and energy exchange. It is hard to feel another in deep need and being asked for some relief. It is obviously natural to want to help the alleviation. However, something sacred is short-circuited in the process.

It is about advocating for this part of us, the Dark One, to be held by our human heart. It is about being okay with not being okay. It is about just trying to feel yourself in the room with it. The more you can show up for it, in whatever capacity, the more they feel willing to let go and lean in.

This is not an easy process. It can feel scary and uncertain. Yet feeling the Love of Other, in what ever form that may take, gives that one ounce separation needed to give rise to this relationship.

The Dark One has a name. It has a story. It has a need and a gift. As the moon energies approach in the month of January, they may illuminate this energy inside. I feel them supporting the connection and the remembrance of this being into your consciousness. It is a brand new way to be WITH the pain rather than merging with it. That is a hero’s journey.

*****

Gabriel Heartman is an emoto-spiritual men’s and women’s facilitator, energy healer, writer, poet, and heartist with the SoulFullHeart Way of Life.  Visit https://www.soulfullheartwayoflife.com for more information about space holding sessions, group calls, videos, community, etc.

Visit our website to offer a money donation to support our offerings at https://www.soulfullheartwayoflife/donations.

A Bridge To The SOULstice: The Sacred Well Of Our Vulnerability

On this list of reflective explorations that I am feeling into on the way to the SOULstice, I feel that the Heart is the most complex and challenging to go into alongside our social connections. It is the realm of our truth and our deepest desires and passions. It has been the one that I have personally had my biggest challenges with. Being aware of and expressing out what is real in the heart domain.

In the vastness of awakening and ascension transmissions, the heart and emotions can seemingly be covered over as something to transcend or bypassed. There is a deep protection of the Heart and Its Truth due to so much wounding that has occurred in this life and other lives, past, present, and future. Being vulnerable to what we are feeling and experiencing is a maturation process that I feel we are all a part of on this global and galactic journey. We are all in need of growing up in this department, some less or more than others.

The time of the SOULstice offers an invitation to feel what is true inside of our emotional body. The frequencies we dip into in reaction to all sorts of circumstances very much affect our ability to let in and express love. It is the messiness of our truth-telling that opens portals, completes old patterns and creates opportunities for deepening and expansion. It brings us to the edge of what really matters the most…what is the most poignant (thank you, Kalayna).

I am still in the healing and feeling curve when it comes to this one. I feel it is for a lot of men, and the masculine in women both. There is so much that we don’t know about ourselves because we haven’t given ourselves the permission, or feel the safety of, going into the depths of what is our truest North. Parts of us can easily accept the goodness of being content and “better than it was”. This may be a necessary phase in order to heal. But it is also a time to gather strength for the next levels of our truth, the beacon of our own light.

It is a time for exploring and feeling the wounds and protection around your inner voice. During this time of gathering with others, you can become aware of the triggers and reactions within and just notice the mechanisms that keep your truth at bay. There are self-loving reasons for it and those are honored. Then there are parts of the journey in which you begin to express more of what is moving through and in your heart, whether they appear “right” or “rational”.  This is done in negotiation with your Inner Protector. 

Some questions to ponder are:

*How does it feel inside of me when I have a truth to tell that I don’t feel comfortable to express?
*What is good about keeping reactions and vulnerability at bay?
*How was relating to emotions modeled to me in my family and what impact does it have on me now?
*If you are one who is free to speak your truth, what energy do you feel is underneath the truth-telling? Is it compassionate, charged, matter-of-fact?

The emotional body is like an untapped, unexplored well of parts, held by the Inner Protector, and Metasoul aspects that are in deep need of being felt and integrated. The most spiritual people in the world are only as mature as their emotional bodies, hence the news of some leaders being exposed in very unsightly circumstances. Our spiritual ascension is in concert with our emotional ascension. Going into this well certainly provides the fuel for the growth that our souls, beloveds, and star families are longing for us to embody and model for the universe at large. We are the truth we have been waiting for.

*****

Gabriel Heartman is an emoto-spiritual men’s and women’s facilitator, energy healer, writer, poet, and heartist with the SoulFullHeart Way of Life.  

Visit https://www.soulfullheartwayoflife.com for more information about space holding sessions, group calls, videos, community, etc. Visit our website to offer a money donation to support our offerings at https://www.soulfullheartwayoflife/donations.

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