Going Yin: Birthing Through A Gateway

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Photo by Autumn Skye Morrison

Enjoying some rest time today. I was guided to just BE in quiet yinner space and let my heart guide me. Feel what needs connecting with inside. Then I recalled it was 12/12 today. A significant gateway into a higher timeline. I have been feeling a feminine container around me this last week or so even during occasional masculine production modes. I can actually feel Her during these times. She is wrapping something around me to guide me, and maybe more specifically, an aspect of me into a new ground of balanced creativeness. When I feel the more pressing or pushing energy, I know I hit the wall of Her womb gently inviting me back inward.

It is far less than it used to be in the past, but when it arises it is becoming much more recognizable. So it felt important to take this Yin space and feel this with my parts, more specifically my Gatekeeper, or soul guardian, for whom I am in deepening relationship with. He was feeling how the energy to produce can come from a need to fill a lack or void within. Something that is not being felt from a You-to-You space. It is the void space that holds some of our deepest fears. Fears of rejection, abandonment, and inadequacy. So much doing and achieving can be used to fill and cover this hole yet still not feel Whole.

This is a very kinetic feeling inside. An upward swing of temporal euphoria, like a subtle brush across the forehead that symbolizes a relief that a part avoided the void once again. The reality of course is that no matter what we throw into it or try and cover it with, it will always be there until we feel that part of us that is working overtime and not getting paid for it…meaning it is not feeling the deeper pain and being held in it with love.

I could feel the deeper layers of Noel needing connection with me. Needing help navigating this birthing into being and meaning. So used to being in the shadows, hiding and protecting. Being fused to the more wounded need for being loved by what you do and don’t say rather than who you are and what your truth is. Not being fully aware of what Love truly is wanting him to feel about himself as a part of a bigger picture of service and surrender.

This is where the infusion of divine feminine energy is helping to birth both of us into a new timeline of leadership and expanding vulnerability. Purpose and meaning. The space between motion and rest. There is a great balancing act occurring in my world today as I surrender to it. That feels like the key into this next gateway. Surrendering to the feelings inside that are inside the covered void. Creating a Yin day for yourself and the parts of you that need your love and attention. This is what is offered in SoulFullHeart as a means to feel the deeper layers of your being to allow for more arising of your authentic and glorious creative You.
I feel how the masculine in us all, both male and female, benefits from this rest and going yin time. Not as a means to check out, but a way to feel the next pieces to move into a higher vibration of joy and BEing that makes us whole again.

Gabriel Heartman is an emoto-spiritual men’s and women’s facilitator, energy healer, writer, poet, and heartist with the SoulFullHeart Way of Life.  Visit https://www.soulfullheartwayoflife.com for more information about space holding sessions, group calls, videos, community, etc.

Visit our patreon page to offer a money donation to support our offerings at https://www.patreon.com/soulfullheart.

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Sunset Codes Available For Sacred Union Activations & Healing The Wounded Feminine

By Jelelle Awen

These Sacred Union codes activating since the Super Moon last Sunday are amazing, soft, like a ‘spa day’ to let in….especially during sunset and with your partner if you are with one. Or if not, to let in to all parts of you. Christiel and Magdalena serve as Sacred Union guides to balance the Divine masculine and feminine withIN first and primarily. You may also experience them as ‘pushing up oil’ from the emotional body, especially related to emotional wounding connected to your gender expression, relationships, sexual abuse, etc. THIS ground is so ripe and in collective need of healing!

I was able to take these codes in yesterday at the beach during sunset for the first time in a few days as I have been so passionately focused on serving in sessions everyday, various SoulFullHeart projects, and birthing/putting together my new book baby, Bliss Mess: Wonders and Challenges of Ascension (to be released on January 1st, 2018). It has also been the time before my moon/menstrual cycle and these codes seem to be INtensifying the premenstrual symptoms. I have felt this before; how the codes amplify hormones and also the cellular clearing continues of the all years of ‘pain’ associated with our monthly cycles. There is something so importantly and quintessentially feminine about our moon cycles though and surrendering to the experience of it all (even the discomfort) brings in this new kind of stillness, rest, and often, I find, huge bursts of creativity.

During session space with women recently, I’ve been feeling and digesting and transmuting with them of the wounded feminine in more intensity, the playouts of this in this life choices (stemming usually from Metasoul other lifetimes/timelines and karmic binds) of sexual abuse and/or repeated patterns of toxicity in relationships with men, plus the subsequent blocking/filtering of feminine sexuality to keep it ‘safe and preserved.’ In our SoulFullHeart process, we start with the Inner Protector, a masculine part that has HAD to come in to protect and form shields and preserve the inner feminine (and in men too). Negotiation with this Protector opens up access to the TRUE feminine to arise, often through connection with the Inner Teenager part, who holds so much of our budding sexuality, romantic fantasy, passion, and creativity. More about these parts here:soulfullheartwayoflife.com/parts

My heart, my womb, my yoni just FEELS the heaviness and sadness playouts of all this wounded feminine gender expression. I feel her cries, her preciousness, her desires. I feel GREAT compassion for it as I have walked (and continue to walk and hold) this ground within myself and my Metasoul. This work of healing the wounded feminine so She can arise is SO important. Not to just transcend or bypass into priestess frequencies or feminine warrior. Yet, to BE with the sensitive, the vulnerable, and the precious. I am honored to serve it through a process that works to transform and heal her. I am honored to Be her. I am honored to Be in a sacred union where my feminine is watered so consistently and lovingly so I can share from the overflow!!

Raphael and I will be sharing tomorrow about these sacred union codes, the inner union and sacred union, connection with your Protector, Teenager, and other parts, and more during our monthly group call at 11:11am.Gabriel Heartman and Kalayna Colibri (pictured in their USness glow below) will also be teaching and sharing! Go here for more info:https://www.facebook.com/events/813881412132524/

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Jelelle Awen is a Soul Scribe, Sacred Feminine and Sacred Union Facilitator, co-creator and teacher of the SoulFullHeart Way Of Life. She is author of  Sacred Human, Arising Wonder: Ascension Through Integration Of Your Emotional Body With Your Spirituality and  Keep Waking Up! Awakening Journeys To Avalon And Beyond.

Visit soulfullheartwayoflife.com for more information about space holding sessions and a free intro session, group calls, videos, etc. Visit our patreon page to offer a monthly or one time money donation to support our offerings at https://www.patreon.com/soulfullheart.

Loving And Healing Your Invulnerability: The Gateway To Your Sacred Humanity

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To a part of us, Love is scary as Hell. Our invulnerability, our protection from totally feeling what is churning inside of us, is the expression of that part. Or in-expression as the case may be. This feels especially true for men, yet women have their own version of it too. It can also come out in expressed rage, as there is something so very vulnerable underneath it…a deep feeling of hurt and rejection. Our outer defenses are both guarding something precious as well as preventing something precious at the very same time. It is Love seeking Itself inside of you.

What is scary is letting the guard down and exposing what has been hidden. It is the exposure of the hurt, the fear, the guilt, and the truth in all its edges and judgment. It is the fear of seeing something that feels “ugly”, which is only a judgement we carry in ourselves. It is the very real possibility that life will forever be changed and made unknown. The guard keeps the safe intact, while Hell itself reigns supreme inside the fortress walls.

There are aspects of us that have not seen the light of our own consciousness until we begin the deep work of inner healing. It is a journey into lands that are filled with creatures both of light and of dark. The shadow is a storage warehouse of sorts. An invisible doorway until we trip on the wire that is hooked up to it by our own experience. It holds all things unsightly and extremely sacred to us. All of our greatest power and potential resides in these lands for us to reclaim when we have decided the time is Now. Until then, the universe, in concert with our Higher Self, continues to send us what we need to continue this dance with Love, whether in resistance or unison.

As Gaia edges her way “forward” in her ascension and union with Love, we too experience the Light knocking at the door of our most guarded self. The guardian at the gates may feel an attack is brewing and will double down on protection by any means. Or it may just decide that it is done with the gig and look for help in the solace of your sacred human heart. We are key-holders, yet we must negotiate with our protector as we need their help in the reintegration of all that has been locked away.

Going IN, is ultimately the only way to go UP. Without fully seeing and feeling what is hidden will we ever truly feel what it means to be seen. To be altered and transmuted by Love. This is the ultimate invitation of sacred romance and intimacy. You can only go so far on your own as you need an other, in the deepest and scariest waters, to see what you couldn’t or weren’t willing to see or feel. Ascension is stillborn outside the gates of our shadow. Being vulnerable with your invulnerability is what takes you to the burning grounds of all that is not in your highest being.

Gabriel Heartman is an emoto-spiritual men’s and women’s facilitator, energy healer, writer, poet, and heartist with the SoulFullHeart Way of Life.  Visit https://www.soulfullheartwayoflife.com for more information about space holding sessions, group calls, videos, community, etc.

Visit our patreon page to offer a money donation to support our offerings at https://www.patreon.com/soulfullheart.

The Inner Matriarch And Wounded Feminine Legacy

by Kalayna Colibri

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Messages of being a warrior, how to stand up to men… conditioning around fighting, especially for our equality, in a world that seems to want anything but. Over-expressing our sexuality in an unemotional or emotionally immature way, or choosing to deny its presence altogether… there is so much templating going on, so many living examples of how to become a matriarch – strong, unsentimental, yet very often unfeeling too. All of this is an expression of the pain and wounds inflicted by a patriarchal culture, yes, and it is all a reflection of how a part of each of us has chosen to be and act in reaction to it. As a collective, modern womanhood has successfully buried what it means to be soft and still, especially as the Inner Matriarch, who is often also the Inner Mother, typically has never been offered a sense of what healthy womanhood is or could be, and thus wants to believe that softness is weakness, the mind and body are ultimately what matter over the heart, and that femininity means building a self-image of femininity that is often depicted in ways that at the core, are actually another expression of the wounded masculine, but with a feminine face.

The Inner Matriarch forms inside of you, following your nearest feminine conditioning while growing up, passed down by your mother or another female caregiver. Even if the influence seems subtle, it is likely working inside of you in many ways, including how you express or choose not to express your sexuality, how you feel about your gender, how you feel about and relate to men and other women as well, and how you navigate many other aspects of your life too. The Inner Matriarch, in this way, is also the Inner Mother – a significant part of any woman, that carries within her the legacy of the matriarchal lineage in her birth family, often to a large degree.

It can be challenging when living out this conditioning, to even realize this is what’s happening. So many patterns are being relived by you that your mother and likely her mother before her also lived out… or, this part of you could be trying to deliberately choose to do the opposite, yet somehow, there is something still playing out that runs parallel to the matrilineal conditioning and grooming. It’s nearly impossible to feel what this legacy really has held for this part of you until you have taken the space necessary from your own birth mother in order to truly feel it. The Inner Matriarch that could be leading much of your decision-making and relating to self and others in your life as you have known it so far, will blend into the tapestry woven by the other women in influence in your birth family and sometimes also in your group of friends. This is why the advocacy for space and going inward is so invaluable.

The Inner Matriarch is often a way in which the pervasive patriarchal culture gets to live on… she has had to become the way she is in order to stand up to and survive in this environment, or so she has been so deeply conditioned to believe. It takes more than the  ‘inner strength’ of any female warrior archetype… it takes the strength of vulnerably feeling where the damage and hurt have been inflicted, bringing it back inward into your heart, and letting feeling waves in. It takes the courage to take the next step to even acknowledge this part of you, to feel and own the conditioning she has had and needed for so long, and to let in that something new could arise. The true feminine arising is a mystery wrapped in an enigma at times, with a soft touch that can also challenge and set boundaries as needed, without nastiness, pettiness or cruelty and without an all-out suppression of inner truth on the flipside of that.

There is a balance that can be lived into, where the rose of feminity can wrap around a healthy, vulnerable spine made of self-love and worth, coupled with a healing and humbled heart that now gets to lead the way… and this is what is offered as the Inner Mother and Matriarch gets felt and begins to heal from the long, long road she has been walking for so long, softening into the frequencies of a Sacred Queen. This is also what opens out the possibility of a nourishing Sacred Union romance with frequencies of heart, body and soul resonance that are nearly impossible to feel with the intensity of a wounded Inner Matriarch expressing predominantly in your life. There is much to go into and feel with her, yet it is all worth it as you begin to realize what your own version of the authentic and ever-arising feminine self is and could become as you move into more and more healing on all levels of your being. ❤

 


 

For more information about going into your own SoulFullHeart process and having space held for this part and other parts of you, please visit http://www.soulfullheartwayoflife.com/sfhprocess. We would love to serve love with you on your own journey into your deepest healing possibilities and timelines…. ❤

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Kalayna Colibri is a SoulFullHeart facilitator for women around (and under) the age of 30, energy healer, indigo-crystal bridge, soul scribe, and poetess.  Visit https://www.soulfullheartwayoflife.com for more information about space holding sessions, group calls, videos, community, etc. Visit our Patreon page to offer a money donation to support our offerings at https://www.patreon.com/soulfullheart.

The INpression Of Our Care-Givers: Feeling And Healing Our Inner Mother and Father

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by Gabriel Heartman and Kalayna Colibri

In the process of getting to “Know Thyself”, one actually finds the mirror you stare into splits into multiple lenses from which to truly see what makes you tick. You are many selves within the container of a more holistic integrated being. We live in the dimension of the “separate yet whole”. The minute you left Divine Source and popped out of the womb you landed in the field of “this and that” without totally being aware of it until you had enough time to be taught and to experience the depth of this perception of reality.

You landed in the arms of caregivers that you chose as a soul, to be reflectors of the world you landed in. They were the ones, or the one, that you were meant to learn from about yourself and life, for a particular phase of time until it was time to learn on your own. They are the single greatest imprint into our psyche and heart, next to community and society at large. The way they reacted or didn’t react to you, to themselves, and to the world established an emotive and mental ground inside of you that helped to form your own version of yourself.  Whether in rebellion against or in conforming to.  The relationship with and between each parent or caregiver created a pattern inside of you in subtle and not-so-subtle ways.

Over time, this energetic relationship created a space inside of yourself that has informed many decisions in regards to so many aspects of your life.  It is an Inner Mother and Father that forms in your emotional body that carries so much data about your 3D Self and how it has found itself surviving and expressing in the world and in relationship. For women, it can express as a wounded and masculinized matriarch that is protecting the more still and sensitive Yin nature of her essence in order to survive in a still rather patriarchal world. For men, it is the expression of the controlling and aggressive patriarch or the suppression of the more vulnerable and tender parts of them.

Either way, it is a way to feel your own participation in playing out the wounded masculine picture of the world as it still largely is and has been. There is an entire lineage and legacy you carry within you, that doesn’t only begin with your birth family, as of course culture and country have influence too. Your parents learned from their parents and found their way however parts of them felt it was best for them and their own consciousness level. Choosing to feel yourself and how this lives within you by your own choice of whether or not to go into it and heal it, puts you in the seat of immense inner power to move beyond it and influence future generations to do the same.

This Inner Mother and Father can hold influence over many other aspects of your 3D Self, such as your Inner Teenager and Inner Child. They are our own versions of how we took in our caregivers. Beginning a relationship with them internally can lead to a vast new experience of ourselves that we never really knew we had, as we have been unconscious of it to the degree we needed to be in order to keep that relationship intact. If there is no external relationship to your parents, the internal still exists until it is felt as a separate part of you that can foster healing, integrating, and an unanchoring of the 3D Self into higher frequencies.  If there is still a external relationship, there may be a necessary phase of separation from them so that you can fully feel what it is that lies inside that is authentically you and what is the internal manifestation of them. Some parts of you may feel as if you are ‘abandoning’ your family/parents and that this is wrong and contemptible. Yet there is no absolute here or even a vow of ‘forever’ being out of contact with them. The space you take simply allows the truths of the relationship to arise and gives you what you need in order to feel yourself and your parts in who you have been and who you want to become.

Getting to know and feel your Inner Mother and Father will lead you to your own connection to your sovereignty of being that is no longer connected to those who ushered you into this 3D life. It will help to let go of the binds and grinds that have kept your 3D Self in the swirl of this deeply impressionable and sacred relationship. As you become a parent to your inner parents you gain a whole new perspective that integrates all the power and gifts they gave you and leave the rest behind on your growing journey into the lands of your healing heart and ascending soul. Plus, in the name of the exponential service of love, you get to become the new template, piece by piece and part by part, for how the new dance of the masculine and feminine gets to arise in this purging, healing, and shifting world.

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Kalayna Colibri and Gabriel Heartman will each write more specifically about the Inner Mother and Father as it relates to the specific genders and how it has informed and affected their personal healing process and relationships. 

Gabriel Heartman is an emoto-spiritual men’s and women’s facilitator, energy healer, writer, poet, and heartist with the SoulFullHeart Way of Life.  

Kalayna Colibri is a SoulFullHeart facilitator for women around (and under) the age of 30, energy healer, indigo-crystal bridge, soul scribe, and poetess.  

Visit https://www.soulfullheartwayoflife.com for more information about space holding sessions, group calls, videos, community, etc. Visit our Patreon page to offer a money donation to support our offerings at https://www.patreon.com/soulfullheart.

 

Our Inner Teenager: The Heart And Soul Of Our 3D Self

 

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The Land of Confusion.  The volatile teenage heart. These are the years of many of our intense experiences with our fading childhood and impending entry into adulthood. These are the times that many of us can go back to and see a scene that our inner teenager lives in.  Those poignant moments that this part of us still lives in that shifted the direction of their life and has yet to fully process it all.  So many different social and familial pressures that left us in a state of tug of war…or just plain war. Those on the healing journey are on it to recover from these very times. Those very moments still burned into the lining of our heart. They are the heart and soul of our 3D Self.

Our inner teenager houses so much of our passion, desire, and dreamer.  Many chose to roll down the rebel road and set fire to whatever could be set fire to, looking for anything that was real in a very unreal world. Others found themselves playing by the rules, suppressing anything that would go against the direction of the greater wave of what was expected of them.  Then there were the in-betweens, never quite comfortable with either. This part of us is so prevalent in our lives.  Without a mature template to walk us through the valley of this very trying time we were left with an imprint that carries on to this day in the way we hold our own 3D health and maturity.

The inner teenager can be seen in our rebellion and our conformity.  It can be found in our relationships and our sexuality.  In the way we need to be by ourselves or the need to be with others.  They are in the closed door bedroom with headphones on, or in the late night party trying to see if they will be noticed by anyone “important” or “hot”. They may even be the default parent and is nowhere close to being like the “others”.  All of this is a part of their heart story that is so needing and wanting to be felt in the depths by someone who is able to deal with the gravity and levity of a teenager.

Going into the world of our inner teenager brings us closer the passion, imagination, and creativity we had to set aside for various reasons.  It is about feeling the loss of innocence that led us to so much serious. They are the bridge from our youth to our maturity.  They are truly seers of new worlds. Healing our inner teenager brings a new vision of life that has technicolor rad-ness and infinite vision.  It brings a joy and lightness that seeks to learn and have fun at the same time. So not like school!

My inner teenager wants to say, “It was never about what I wanted to be when I ‘grew up’, it was about what I was feeling about myself in the moment that mattered most. Having someone I respected feel it with me, not to fix me, just to feel me. I just wanted to live and experience life from place that I felt comfortable in my own skin and didn’t have to impress upon anyone to be accepted, for I hadn’t accepted myself. I wanted know what real masculinity was that wasn’t false bravado. I wanted to know what true love really was that wasn’t based in what I had or didn’t have. I just wanted to feel the courage to be me and not an image to hide behind.”

The gifts abound form this relationship within and we can find ourselves being the parent our inner teenager always wanted us to be, even as we are being challenging with a compassionate heart. The healed teenager integrates into our maturing heart and leads us to new vistas of brave new worlds they always wanted to visit.

 

Gabriel Heartman is an emoto-spiritual men’s and women’s facilitator, energy healer, writer, poet, and heartist with the SoulFullHeart Way of Life.  Visit https://www.soulfullheartwayoflife.com for more information about space holding sessions, group calls, videos, community, etc.

Visit our patreon page to offer a money donation to support our offerings at https://www.patreon.com/soulfullheart.

This Extraordinary Life

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I live a life that is an ever-evolving mystery that is in always in a state of ebb and flow from one heartline to the next.  It feels like an organic, breathing, and growing entity that is in a state of creative flux and expansion.  I traverse dimensions from one hour to the next, one minute teaching children in China the English language and the next I am entering deep emotional and spiritual domains to assist someone through the valley of their inner woundings to feel a sense of home inside themselves.  From there I am helping Kalayna prepare for her new job with my same company, preparing our weekly museletter which has the energy of nuclear fusion in the form of a love bomb, and then typing this reflection to share before heading out to the beach to take in sacred sun codes and merge with the vast serenity of Gaia’s healing waters.  

While at times this has felt like a series of upshifts and downshifts that have left a part of me a bit discombobulated, I am beginning to transition into this new world of flow and surrender. Of needs and authenticity. Riding the waves of intuition and creativity, sometimes getting rolled over in the surf, but always learning something and growing from the experience.  Life and me are beginning to merge more and more into the present and letting go of what may or may not happen.  What is right or wrong.  What I should or shouldn’t do.  It is taking each step with an open heart and divine trust that what comes my way is what was meant for my highest good and growth. To deny or resist them is denying the love that wants to set me into greater heights of experience and awareness.  

There are difficult moments and I am still learning to move with them with as much vulnerability and integrity as possible. Without them I am plateaued and that is not why I have drawn this way of life to inhabit with as much honor and leadership as possible.  It is a life that is lived from one moment to the next, with still having sights on a grander picture of abundance and experience.  There is no intention less than creating a community of SoulFullHearts that expand the globe and the galaxy.  This is no joke.  We left Canada and the US to let go of what was conditioned.  One day we will leave Earth too, to explore new horizons that parts of us can only let in as imagination.  

But there is work to do. Good, heartful, soul expanding work. It is is remarkable life and it is extraordinary.  It has its growth moments but they are all meant to lead us the next and the next, in Love, to Love, for Love, and with Love.  

 
If you are curious about what the SoulFullHeart Way of Life may offer you in your journey toward MORE, you can join us in our next group call this Saturday at 11:11 CST, hosted by Jelelle and Raphael Awen and contributed to by Kalayna Colibri and myself. https://www.facebook.com/events/271320303342295

Gabriel Heartman is an emoto-spiritual teacher, men’s and women’s facilitator, energy healer, writer, poet, and heartist with the SoulFullHeart Way of Life.  Visit https://www.soulfullheartwayoflife.com for more information about space holding sessions, group calls, videos, community, etc.

Visit our patreon page to offer a money donation to support our offerings at https://www.patreon.com/soulfullheart.

The Cracks Of Authenticity Let In Real Love

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There is a moment in our lives when it all just hits the fan. The way we used to interface with the world no longer has any juice left.  The cracks in the facade start to weather, and you just can’t roll with things the way you used to.  You can’t be false. Then the only thing you can really do is shut down, go crazy, or start being honest with yourself.  This is where life gets real and that can be difficult to this part of you that has protected you and tried to find love the only way it knew how.  But it is tired and it is looking for You to come into the picture and help put it all in “order”.

When it is time to let go and get real, it can be a very uneasy process.  There are so many tricky places and conditioned responses that can send us in a wild goose chase for our golden egg of authenticity.   There are painful obstacles and trip-wire sabotage.  Yet there are also glorious movements that bring the walls down and bring in the light of real love from the core of what we truly are.  These times of deep emotional upheavals are like love magma that is looking to surface and coat the pain of what was unfelt.  With a deep spirituality, you can be held during these times by something greater than the pain.

It is going into our emotional wounding that actually gives the spiritual body its depth and meaning.  It is not at all separate, but intrinsically connected to our emotional body. We can live very content emotional and spiritual lives on the surface, but when we consciously choose to enter into something that goes to the core of our BEing we find that we have only just begun to become aware of what we really are and can be.  But as with any real growth comes the price of deep feeling and the transaction of real love.

I can feel the next layers of what eventually needs healing in my emotional body that only comes when divine timing and situation has coalesced to bring that to my awareness.  It can generally take you by surprise and create reactions that are just so perfect for where we need to go to grow.  I have times feeling a part that doesn’t want to “go there” only to assure it that what lies on the other side is more goodness and more love.

This process of emotional and spiritual maturation can be very challenging and difficult to navigate on ones own.  It is being held and guided by others, in community, that serve this very rewarding pathway.  You may find yourself in times of deep personal process that needs a bigger You to show up to, but know that is all part of what is being given to you as a gift for further deepening of emotional and spiritual consciousness.  Knowing there is Love on the other side is what keeps you going and growing.

To feel more about what this the burgeoning new way of life may have to offer you, I invite you to attend our next SoulFullHeart group call this Saturday at 11:11 AM CST.  We will be offering teachings about bridging to your emotional body and your spirituality and a guided meditation to connect with your emotional body (plus individual sharings): https://www.facebook.com/events/271320303342295

 

Gabriel Heartman is an emoto-spiritual teacher, men’s and women’s facilitator, energy healer, writer, poet, and heartist with the SoulFullHeart Way of Life.  Visit https://www.soulfullheartwayoflife.com for more information about space holding sessions, group calls, videos, community, etc.

Visit our patreon page to offer a money donation to support our offerings at https://www.patreon.com/soulfullheart.

Feeling Raw, BEing In Our Emotional Body Movements

By Jelelle Awen

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Feeling raw in the moment…thought I would write when I am raw rather than when I am ‘clear’ and see what comes through. The rawness is the after effects of a deep emotional body movement yesterday. The rawness is how it feels after a purging that comes from so DEEP within that you wonder how could ALL THIS have possibly existed inside of me somewhere? It has been truly fascinating to me over the years HOW MUCH can actually be IN us, stuck in us, stored in us, and how deep and vast the emotional body and our subconscious actually ARE.

STRONG tears came through for me and I sent a lifeline request out to one of my most precious Metasoul sisters/guides to hold space with me for it. Her love, combined with my embodying higher self’s love, held the space while the pain moved through. When such strong tears come through….those body wrenching sobs, it is like when we throw up. It feels uncomfortable, uncontrollable, and we just want it ‘to be over’. We just want to be ‘on the other side’ and the mind is trying desperately to make sense of it all even as it COMPLETELY transcends the mind (as it is meant to.) We can’t contextual it, it doesn’t matter what the ‘energies in the cosmos’ or doing or not doing or what astrological sign we are moving through. The TRUTH is only in the tears and what is coming through and, in these moments, we are completely present to ourselves and this is the gift of them.

Life brought me recently the perfect situation and trigger to push this oil up, this residue of wounding from a chosen legacy of rejection by older women (starting with my birth mother) who don’t ‘see’ and also resist the LOVE that I am offering them and serving to them. This came to a head yesterday for me as I am bridging what is manifesting of my gift expressions in the virtual to the physical now. I could just be a teacher/waySHOWer, writer, facilitator remotely and virtually (so many are and this is good service)….yet I’ve known and felt for a long time that I am here to co-lead a commUNITY, to be IN relationship with many BEloveds, and to feel the specific love energy that we call SoulFullHeart to spread to many others. This invites others into my world and I am called to bridge where I am at in consciousness (which seems to be mostly anchored in 5D since the first of the year) with others. To allow the fluidity of our hearts and vulnerability to LEAD in every moment is the new paradigm leadership. I’m only qualified to lead in this New Earth energy to the degree I am willing to be vulnerable and transparent about what I am feeling.

I INVITE triggers into my life and emotional purges like this too. I WANT to feel ALL that there is to feel inside of myself. I haven’t had a big movement like this in several months as the goodness and flow of service has been my primary experience with seemingly not as much to feel on the emotional body level (after MANY years of focusing on this ground inside myself.) I felt something so GOOD about the movement and I’m sharing today because maybe it will inspire you to make SPACE for these movements in your life too. To work whatever triggers or emotional reactions life gives you and GO IN to feel whatever there is to feel with the parts of you that need that.

Our 3D culture is all about drugging and numbing these movements and our emotions. Tears are hidden and covered over. Being vulnerable is NOT acceptable and we are felt to be ‘weak’ if we are. Even in spirituality, there can be a push to bypass the ‘negative’ or darker emotions in favor of ONLY love and light and positive all the time. The problem with this is that we didn’t actually EXPERIENCE as humans here just light and love so how can approaching our own healing that way possibly heal what lives inside of us? Being open to ALL of it with love to hold it is the way I have found brings the most transformation, healing, openings, and death-rebirth DEEP transmutation. There are no rainbows without rain is the metaphor that comes to me in the moment.

I DO feel that a very important aspect of New Earth/5D reality is the complete embracement and healing of our emotional bodies, and the energies coming in seem to be supporting this exploration in a big way. We could see it as the ‘next frontier’ to our evolutionary path as moving into our sacred humanity. And this frontier is SO natural to us that once we stop resisting it, we receive the bountiful gifts that our emotionality has to offer us….and feel the beacon it is to ourselves and the entire Universe as well.

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Join us on saturday for a group call with me and Raphael Awen offering teachings about bridging to your emotional body and your spirituality and a guided meditation to connect with your emotional body (plus individual sharings): https://www.facebook.com/events/271320303342295

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Jelelle Awen is an Emoto-Spiritual Teacher, Soul Scribe, waySHOWer, and co-creator and teacher of the SoulFullHeart Way Of Life. She is author of Sacred Human, Arising Wonder: Ascension Through Integration Of Your Emotional Body With Your Spirituality and  Keep Waking Up! Awakening Journeys To Avalon And Beyond Visit soulfullheartwayoflife.com for more information about space holding sessions with SoulFullHeart Facilitators, group calls, videos, community, etc. Visit our patreon page to offer a money donation to support our offerings at https://www.patreon.com/soulfullheart.

What Love Wants

67

 

I want you to feel free my beloved

Free to be real, to be vulnerable, to be open

Free to be cautious, uncertain, and afraid

I want you to be able to let in more, not less

To let in that you are desire and desired

That you are alive and living

That you are right and not wrong

I want you to remember your value and worth

Your beauty and sensuality

Your capacity and ability

I want you to trust that you ARE lovedust

That it cannot be taken from you

Only hidden and buried

I want you to know that I know it is hard

That true and pure love can burn and hurt

That it can pierce and collapse

All you thought I was, but turned out I wasn’t

I remember how you never got what you needed

What you wanted

What mattered the most

And I remember how you needed that to remember

What you truly are

I am not going anywhere

For no matter where you go

What you do

I…will…be…there

Always

Fovever

Patient

Persistent

 

Gabriel Heartman is an emoto-spiritual teacher, men’s and women’s facilitator, energy healer, writer, poet, and heartist with the SoulFullHeart Way of Life.  Visit https://www.soulfullheartwayoflife.com for more information about space holding sessions, group calls, videos, community, etc.

Visit our patreon page to offer a money donation to support our offerings at https://www.patreon.com/soulfullheart.