The Gift Of Humility And Gratitude

Yesterday was the first time I had been in a SoulFullHeart group space for a few months. While in one way it felt like yesterday, it was also a huge gap for parts of me that have been in deep feeling space and processing over that time. This is such evidence of how we live on many different dimensions at once and time is just does not have a standard trajectory, nor is real in many ways.

My movement with my masculine and reptilian self two days prior really felt to pave the way for this reunion. I could feel some nervousness and doubts from parts of me that I would be at that frequency to be able to vibe into the coherence. This of course is one big projection of my own lack of worth that I have been working on since I parted in January.

However, through the process that I had, I felt a clearing inside of me that ‘moulted’ away the layer that was holding this reaction and energy. I could feel myself more in the space as Gabriel, the being that really never left yet has come back with a new relationship to himself and the world around him. That difference, I noticed last night, was that of authentic humility and gratitude.

These two emotional grounds are the result of the self-love and deep, wounded ego healing that I went through while I was away. I could feel a reverence of the space, the beloveds in front of me, but more importantly the reverence and care for myself that had been cultivated during this time. I felt my parts being held by me and leaning into the goodness that was alive in the space. There was no self-judgement or comparison going on that seemed to run underground in the past.

I felt who I was and where I was in the ‘order’ of things and felt so very present to the goodness of that. Not trying to be anything I wasn’t. This is all that has ever been asked of me, yet I hadn’t asked of it from myself. This time I have and it felt palpably different. I have to owe all of that shift to parts work and my own dedication to it. Even if things were to shift at some point and I find myself on my own again, I have a me that can’t leave me. I would go through grief, for sure, but I would not perish or suffer.

It is with this humility and gratitude that I can ride the waves of what the universe bestows upon me whether it be as a collaborator, a support system, a facilitator, or all three! I know this is where I belong in whatever fashion. This is my family, my community, and my way of life. And for that it was all worth it.

*****

Gabriel Heartman is a Facilitant and Collaborator with the SoulFullHeart Way of Life.  Visit https://www.soulfullheartorg.com for more information about space holding sessions, group calls, videos, community, etc.

Metasoul Timelines Coming Through On Halloween: Personal Sharing

By Jelelle Awen

Halloween was an opportunity for us to channel and tap into energies in our soul to express and allow ‘out’ for an evening. Raphael reigned as King Arthur from our porch, giving out candy with huge generousity and presence to over 300 children! A community bonfire raged right across the street, which added to the feeling of teleporting to another timeline.

I got to bring forward my inner Priestess and Queen too…remembering how it is walk in the woods with a long dress and sleeves, feeling feminine in a regal way, making sure there was enough food, warmth, magic and fun for everyone.

Nic joined us again for the evening, adding his unique, fun, and open hearted joy to ours and with Raianna, they made a sweet and lively Elven pair. Gabriel channeled his Victorian, Steampunk self, both dapper and a bit madcap.

Feeling grateful for the community feeling that extended beyond our little SoulFullHeart den last night….and hopeful for a taste and glimpse of what New Earth community could feel like.

Hope you are having a rich, deep, and explorative Halloween, Samhain, Day of the Dead, etc.

love,
Jelelle Awen
soulfullheartwayoflife.com/sessions

 

Experience Soul Family Connection!: Upcoming SoulFullHeart Group Sessions -Local And Virtual (over zoom)

By Jelelle Awen
This house is getting ready to host. 🙂 I can feel the energy shifting to include more, to host more, to allow more souls to settle in and experience the way of life that we get to blessedly transact with each other every day. In less than two weeks, we’ll be joined by a sweet group of 3-4 women flying in to spend four days with us during the Equinox, to engage in personal and collective emotional/spiritual/energy/sound/physical healing. They are all staying here at the house so we are affectionately calling this the “SoulFullHeart Slumber Party”. ❤
You could still join us if you feel drawn to! The gathering starts on Friday, September 19th at 10:00am PDT until 5pm…each day until Monday, September 23rd. Cost for the gathering itself is $250 CAD (about $200 USD). We could fit you somewhere in the house too if you are ok sleeping on an air mattress or there are wonderful airbnbs around here. Food costs will be lower as communal meals can be planned using our kitchen. There is more info here: soulfullheartwayoflife.com/gatherings
You need to have one session with a SoulFullHeart Facilitator before the Gathering to make sure that you are resonant with what we are offering. We also have a gathering coming up for the Winter SOULstice! More info here: https://www.facebook.com/events/1654802484653131/ or soulfullheartwayoflife.com/gatherings
We are also hosting a free meditation circle next Tuesday at 6pm PDT for those that might be local to Victoria, BC. There is more info here about that: https://www.soulfullheartwayoflife.com/events
Our next monthly group transmission is next Saturday, September 14th at 10:00am PDT to explore 4D Matrix karmic healing with your gatekeeper….a BIG part of the deeper process going on. There is more info here about joining us for $15 CAD to join live or receive the recording: https://www.facebook.com/events/1340021326164133/
or soulfullheartwayoflife.com/grouptransmissions
AND, my first sacred feminine exploration women’s group over zoom is scheduled now for Sunday, September 29th at 10:00am PDT. We will explore the aspects of self and soul that need healing to arise our sacred femininity and I’ll provide bridges to the Divine Mother as well. This is open to ALL women over 18 for $15 CAD to attend live or to receive the recording. More info here: https://www.facebook.com/events/933962383622792/ or https://www.soulfullheartwayoflife.com/womengroupcalls
Thank you for joining us on this exploration into the SoulFullHeart Experience through group sessions!
Love,
Jelelle Awen
All events listed here: soulfullheartwayoflife.com/events

INtimacy over INvisibility

By Raianna Shai

I haven’t written a post in a while as a lot has been shifting and growing in my world. A couple of weeks ago Kalayna and I spent a few days on Salt Spring and just this week we all spent time camping in Goldstream.

One theme that has been popping up a lot for myself as well as my entire community is intimacy in relationships. I have always had this tendency and even desire inside of me to be invisible. I was incredibly shy as a child, I never rose my hand in class, I chose to blend in for any social interaction. I had absolutely no desire to be seen or more vulnerably, to be judged by others.

It’s easy to get into a “mode” in every relationship in your life and it doesn’t take long to establish, even with new people. We find what frequency is most comfortable and what allows us to get along with this other person. What gets hard is when something gets triggered or rubs against something inside of us.

I have found that most people either push away their reactions towards others, judging them as unfair or just not worth it, or they push their reactions on others, without feeling what the impact might be or what’s going on inside of them. Both of these strategies allow us to hide, to put away the deeper and more vulnerable parts of us that go against the already agreed upon frequency that you have established in the relationship.

Parts of me fear that my truth will either end the relationship or deepen it. Both risking being seen for more than my persona. Going against the grain of what is comfortable in relationship is exactly what intimacy is all about.

You tell your truth, as messy as it gets, until one day you are transparent in every moment. Until you have no fear locking you into place and all of your words come from love for yourself and love for other. Until you trust that losing a relationship is okay and deepening a relationship is okay too. Until you are so centred inside of yourself that no level of intimacy can scare you away. Even when fear comes up there is progress and honesty about it all. That is when community can flourish and become something new and never done before.

Raianna Shai is a SoulFullHeart facilitant and social media maven for SoulFullHeart Way Of Life. Visit  www.soulfullheartwayoflife.com for more information about sessions, events, videos, community, etc. Return LOVE in money form: https://www.paypal.me/supportsoulfullheart or visit our Patreon page to become a monthly supporter: https://www.patreon.com/soulfullheart.

 

Vulnerability In Relationship

By Raianna Shai

I wrote this poem after having just the right day to open up my heart. Whenever this happens every space inside of me that feels like a void fills up with gratitude and appreciation of my environment and the people around me. I was reminded of why I tend to feel guarded around others and how good it feels to be intimate in relationship.

I am very good at being alone. I have always been independent and able to entertain myself quite easily. I thought recently that I would be happier and more opened out living on my own. But the fact that living with others is harder and scarier means it’s probably what I’m meant to be working.

I was feeling how it’s so easy to feel misunderstood or judged by others when you have that living inside of yourself. Whenever my insecurity was high, I found that it was harder to let others in and be vulnerable. I also remembered how much I love physical touch and how important it is to increase the intimacy in relationships. A lingering hug here, a friendly cuddle there. I always saved this for when I was in a romantic relationship because that’s where it felt safe and accepted.

But telling someone what they mean to you and showing physical affection are two things that are bound to be scary. It means you are seeing the other and therefore “risk” being seen yourself. This can bring up a lot of fear if a sense of lack or unworthiness lives inside of you.

I have a big desire to go to the next place in all of my relationships in order to work this push pull inside of me when it comes to intimacy. This poem illustrates the feeling I had of that!

~~~

In the moments that my heart splits open
Gratitude fills every atom of my soul
My body sways with tenderness and care
I want to wrap my arms around every lonely heart
Connecting to oneness and collective love

My fingers trace the edges of my frame
It runs along every crack
Every bump
Every inconsistency
It fills my emptiness with loving energy
It brings out the softness underneath the surface

Soft vulnerability is hard to show
The sweet caress of your own beauty
Uniquely separate from those around you
Yet intertwined in insecurity and fear

I feel overwhelmed by the thought of my loved ones
The way they move through life
The way they see and care for me
When I can’t see myself

You are so brave, dear one
To be a bright green growth
In a grey sidewalk crack
Constantly fearing the underside of passing steps
The shadow side of humanity

I see you, I feel you
I want you, I need you
I feel scared to tell you
That I admire you
And hope you admire me too

Raianna Shai is a SoulFullHeart facilitant and social media maven for SoulFullHeart Way Of Life. Visit  www.soulfullheartwayoflife.com for more information about sessions, events, videos, community, etc. Return LOVE in money form: https://www.paypal.me/supportsoulfullheart or visit our Patreon page to become a monthly supporter: https://www.patreon.com/soulfullheart.

The Challenge To Let In Love

Photo courtesy of https://unsplash.com/@marigard

By Raphael Awen

‘The biggest challenge you will ever face in this life is the challenge to let in love.’

These words came to me many years ago from a trusted teacher, and I’ve often taken this encapsulated sermon in a sentence from a mental file to reflect on it. I still do believe it to be true.

What dawned on me today though, on this resurrection Sunday, is an addendum to this sentence, and pardon me if it doesn’t quite fit in a sentence so simple as the first one, but the awareness that came is that for there to be a letting in, there would need to be a letting out.

Like breathing, we take in oxygen, transmute it, digest it, and then release and expel carbon dioxide. Trying to remain in a continual letting in mode, without surrendering to a letting out mode, would limit the letting in very quickly, making the original challenge to let in love feel all the more impossible.

If that’s true, that letting out is equally important as the attempt to let in; and that letting in can’t actually be separate from letting out, then what might the letting out look and feel like?

And as I tune in beloved guides, what comes to me in a gush of a big out breath of awareness is that we are being invited to trans-parent this love in-breath into a vulnerable willingness to be seen and known for what we really are. Am I able to to let you (any and all others in my life) see me for who I really am? This washing away of these false gods of upholding self image require so much time and energy, and prevent me from letting in another drop of real love. The letting in pushes up a profound need for letting out.

If that’s all true, then the question comes up about where to practically apply all this as a practice. It can be very relieving to immediately put this into practice in your relationships with anyone, whether a deep intimate or a store clerk, yes, but what comes to me is the invitation to apply this all internally, me to me.

Where are parts of me struggling to gasp in another breath of real love and then are being prevented from letting out its effluent. What has not been trans-parented into the light of day between parts of myself? Where have parts of me been allowed to remain in suffering in the absence of my deeper heart bridge to them?

This is the resurrection we are invited into – that is here now. He is risen. She is risen. The fall has given way to the rising. You are the beloved and the beloved is you. A sacred romance awaits like you’ve never seen or heard tell of.

It’s a story that only you can tell awaiting your authorship.

Raphael Awen is co-creator, teacher, and facilitator of the SoulFullHeart Way Of Life.  Visit soulfullheartwayoflife.com for more information about sessions, events, videos, etc.

Christ/Magdalene Light Streams In To Begin This ‘Christmas Season’

by Kalayna Colibri
Today… today it feels like Christ Consciousness is coming in to be held and to hold us too. It’s the ‘official’ kick-off of the Christmas season here in North America, so there’s that, yet increasingly as we approach 12/12 and perhaps especially with all of the ‘current events’ ongoing, Christ Consciousness is coming through with a palpable Divine Father/Masculine energy.
 
Today may be a hyper shopping day for some, which promises a gateway to much debt as many choose to invest their energy and resources into making purchases to perhaps try and please the unpleasable, both inside and out. Yet, almost as if to try and help us learn to hold and BE with these emotional highs and lows instead of spending scads of money and emotional energy to placate something, there’s all this warm, golden Christ energy coming through to hold us and remind us that we ARE more than this by birthright and soul-right.
 
The Divine feels us in this emotionally and spiritually-charged time we call the ‘Christmas Season’ and offers space for parts of us to land and lean more into the glow of the Christ Consciousness light waves coming in what look and feel like golden and red glittering bands of light. This is the Christ/Magdalene love coming in to encourage us to feel all there is to feel and move even more towards a unified inner community as well as resonant soul family/community. There is SO much light streaming in that it can’t help but bring UP what isn’t love inside of you and the ache for MORE of what you most authentically WANT in your heart and soul.
 
It is a powerful choice to go inward and feel during this time instead of looking outward for quelling what is becoming harder and harder to quell or quiet down inside. To explore the parts of you hurting and reacting during this time, to help them and to be with them as the most important ‘family’ you could ever work to love and hold dear. It is equally powerful to vulnerably reach out for help and to courageously show up to support others in their healing too. This is an aspect of Christ Consciousness that begins, as always, from within… and we are invited as this ‘Christmas season’ (which is really ‘Christ-Consciousness Season’) begins, to truly land in our hearts in a new and renewed way, whatever that means for us in any given moment.
 
Much love! ❤

***

Kalayna Colibri is a SoulFullHeart Facilitator for women age 25 and under, energy healer, soul scribe, and poetess.  Visit https://www.soulfullheartwayoflife.com for more information about space holding sessions, group calls, videos, community, etc. Visit our Patreon page to offer a money donation to support our offerings at https://www.patreon.com/soulfullheart.

From Living Room To Loving Room: Celebrating Sacred Group Process Space, Community Shifts And Changes

By Kalayna Colibri

At first glance, our living room is a mess, yeah? Well, if you could vibe yourself here to be in this room right now, the mess wouldn’t matter… this is the best room in Gabriel and I’s house right now. The warmth as I sit here and digest what moved between Gabriel and I as well as within us individually and within the hearts and souls of my other beloveds in this space today, I feel the warmth of the love container that held us all… the love energies coming from our hearts to our parts, our hearts to each other and each other’s parts. It’s a powerful energy to be in and around and not one that comes without cost, without constant and consistent choice, without courage and a deep trust within that love is carrying us to our next layers within and within relationship to each other too.

This was one of our last group healing spaces together before Jelelle, Raphael and Raianna go back to Canada, where we all came from 4 years ago, nearly to the day. It was a beautiful weekend of connection and process. It was a time of bittersweet celebration and abundance of love… digestions of our journey together so far and how much we are going to miss each other too.

We are choosing this next phase of separation so that Gabriel and I can build our kingdom together as a Sacred Union couple, an arising King and Queen. Jelelle and Raphael have their next phase of leadership too, moving on from this geography to be in a new phase of grist for their own processes and also to continue expanding our community. Raianna will be making connections of her own back in Canada too. In all cases, the intention holding all of it and all of us is to serve love… to ourselves, between each other, and with others. We ultimately want more of YOU to be able to access and experience what we experience together… the gifts and growth crucibles of soul family connections and the catalytic nature of this work.

So, a messy living room to some… but a warm LOVING room to me. And you’re all invited to take part in your next steps, feeling how they may even connect you more to us in the ways you’re ready for.

Follow along on all our Facebook feeds, our website (soulfullheartwayoflife.com) our blog (soulfullheartblog.com), our YouTube (SoulFullHeart Experience), and/or sign up for our free weekly Museletter on our website.

I wish you much love… from my heart to yours. ❤️

***

Kalayna Colibri is a SoulFullHeart co-founder, soul scribe, and poetess. Visit https://www.soulfullheartwayoflife.com for more information about space holding sessions, group calls, videos, community, etc. Visit our Patreon page to offer a money donation to support our offerings at https://www.patreon.com/soulfullheart.

Eclipse Energies Supporting Illumination Of Resistance To Love

by Kalayna Colibri

There are still some residual pieces to feel as the Lion’s Gate energies continue to wan and the eclipse today shines its light… a partial eclipse, so it feels like it acknowledges the illuminating work done so far, yet wants to offer this illumination as a way to see and feel what remains in shadow too. One needs the other, needs contrast, in order to be deeply felt and let in…

It’s always amazing to me, how the capacity of our parts to filter out and resist love too is exactly the same capacity they have to hold the tears of collapse INTO love, into you, into their realities and what’s been bubbling underneath the now glassy surface.

Amazing too, how right in line with this, there can be SO much GOODNESS and LOVE to let in while also feeling the baggage to be claimed within, the places where love still needs to go in order to help you move the residue of old conditioning and the remnants of your deepest pain.

I feel this eclipse today offering this and so much more… that there always is and will be so much more, especially more love in the truest, purest sense. Ideas of abundance seem to be falling away or shifting into something new, something not materialistic at all, yet too, there are new invitations now to revisit even ‘material’ abundance and have a new relationship with it.

I feel this all so much on a personal level – the letting in of deeper and deeper love with others yet with myself and my own parts/Metasoul too. So often for me, there can be a heart-wide-open letting in feeling and experience that is like a Kundalini experience x infinity in moments, while in sometimes the very next wave there is also an experience of fear, of resistance, of self-judgment in parts of me that are trying to put the brakes on the goodness. This happens less and less now, yet it does happen. And, I feel how this is true for so many… the more love there is to let in, the more room we need to make for it.

Infinite love to you on this eclipse day… may you shine bright in your own right, in your exploration of your shadow/suppressed parts, in your deeper and deeper embracement of the love that you are. ❤

If you feel you’re in need of support for your own digestion of these and other incoming Ascension-boosting/supporting energies, check out our offering of very affordable Bridging Sessions… we would love to extend our hearts to you at this time! www.soulfullhearwayoflife.com/bridging-session

***

Kalayna Colibri is a SoulFullHeart Facilitator for women around (and under) the age of 35, emoto-spiritual teacher, WayShower, energy healer, indigo-crystal bridge, soul scribe, and poetess.  Visit https://www.soulfullheartwayoflife.com for more information about space holding sessions, group calls, videos, community, etc. Visit our Patreon page to offer a money donation to support our offerings at https://www.patreon.com/soulfullheart.

‘New Earth Now’ Energies Inviting Us Home

Inside each and every one of us is a need to belong. I don’t feel it is a desire, but a substantial need that comes from the depths of our essential Unity…our inescapable communion with Love Itself, as my metaphysical mentor Raphael Awen would say. We are infinity and eternally in communion with unity at our core. This is the conscious and unconscious draw to tribe, family, and community. We need it because we ARE it.

Even in your most isolated moments, the ones where a part of you could do without ever coming in contact with another living soul (and there is that part at times), that you can feel the ache underneath. It is just that inside of the emotional body there lies a wound. A pain. It can come in the form of rejection, abandonment, or physical trauma. As we go into the healing journey there are this-life wounds that keep the 3D self in a state of guard and defense. Or a part, such as the Protector, could even outwardly seek communal trauma to prove that intimacy with others is not what it is all cracked up to be. The birth family can be a big source of this proof in the pudding.

In the Metasoul, there can be lifetimes of this communal trauma either from human to human, human to God, or archetype to archetype. It is a huge source of existential pain, especially for the aspect of us we call the Gatekeeper. They have been in their own created isolation chambers, and as Gaia continues her upward flight, these walls are thinning and they are beginning to feel the ache of that separation, especially from the Divine. This is another piece to our communal healing.

As we begin to awaken to our Starseed nature, the feeling of separation from our Star Family is a layer that takes on profound significance as a sacred core wound of the need to belong. The wounded Starseed needs to be felt in this abandonment trauma to fully let in the depths of our galactic mission on this planet. It is one that many have inside whether it has been triggered consciously or not. Our relationship to our Star Self is the beginning of a whole new dimension to how we relate to each other as humans. The evolution of our Gaian 5D Self.

Ultimately, the communion begins within from you to you, you to your parts, you to your Metasoul, you to the Divine, you to your Star Family. That sets the ground for relational communion with Other. A sacred union mate, a deep resonant friendship, and profound soul family experience. This is what you came here for. Not to be sitting behind your computer getting your social needs met, but going IN to heal and then going OUT to find more resonance. It doesn’t mean you won’t get hurt, it just means that you will be able to relate to the hurt differently and learn more about yourself to draw those that most see you the way that you truly see yourself. To find those that will water your goodness and challenge you to become more than you ever thought possible.

Welcome to New Earth Now.

Gabriel Heartman is an emoto-spiritual men’s and women’s facilitator, energy healer, writer, poet, and heartist with the SoulFullHeart Way of Life.  Visit https://www.soulfullheartwayoflife.com for more information about space holding sessions, group calls, videos, community, etc.

Visit our patreon page to offer a money donation to support our offerings at https://www.patreon.com/soulfullheart.