Entering The Now

By Raphael Awen


The easiest and most natural way to ‘enter the Now’ is simply to feel the part of you who isn’t in the Now.

If you can turn your awareness with a curious open heart towards this part of you, then you are creating relational space inside of you; a ‘to’ and ‘from’ space where love can flow, just like in valentines. Without the to and from, there isn’t an ‘other’ there who can feel what is wanting and needing to be felt.

This is your Higher Self inhabiting your life, your Higher Self embodiment.

Until this other shows up in your life, a you who can feel you, all there is present is this part of you trying to get all jacked up about spirituality, or healing or Ascension, often only spinning its wheels, doing the best it can.

Showing up to feel this part of you, to get really curious about its why’s, how’s, what’s, etc. is to enter the Now without needing to become all centered first.

You can enter the Now through this backdoor portal of all the chaos, pain and craziness in your life, an opportune portal awaiting your awareness.


Raphael Awen is co-creator, teacher, and facilitator of the SoulFullHeart Way Of Life. Check out our sessions and process to jump start your spiritual and emotional journey at www.soulfullheartwayoflife.com/sessions.

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The Mindfulness Of Our HeartFULLness


“Leave your heart above your head and your eyes wide open.”- Zack Brown Band

These are words form a  country band that I used to listen to in my ‘past’ life. Or the life a part of me lived years ago. These words popped into my head as I was feeling into mindfulness with my guide Aris, who has a mix of greek philosopher and buddhist monk with angelic wings. The practice of mindfulness was a part of my spiritual journey earlier in my life that lead me to become aware of what was clearly an emotional disillusionment with my life at that time.

I had built a life on the foundations of what was reasonable and sensible for the typical citizen. A good career with a finger on the political pulse of the times. I was a well-loved member of a family and had close relationships to fill my days. But undergirding it all was a depression and a frustration. A need for something that I couldn’t quite put my finger on other than I was ‘off-center” and misaligned in my passion and purpose.

This awareness led me to seek some form of help to change the course of what I was feeling but they were all mainly temporary band-aids. I could feel that there was something else I wanted access to inside myself. What was at the root of this underground well of heaviness?

The mindfulness practice turned into ‘heartfulness’ practice when I began this journey with teh SoulFullHeart process. It led me to a fuller awareness of what was occurring in my emotional body through a multi-lensed frame of parts. This new mindfulness set in motion a slide into E-motion. I had so much backed up feeling that I had almost forgotten what feeling even was outside of anger, frustration, and depression.

From this actual real-time feeling space could I begin to access the core of my pain which became like a new sunset on my life’s possibilities. I began to see the ways in which I had kept myself small and hidden out of fear. Fear of actually being that which I was truly meant to be even in its uncertainty. I just knew what I was feeling wasn’t me. Mindfulness leading to heartfulness.

The rest of the story is one negotiated step at a time that continues to this day just on a different frequency and relational ground. It was the act of taking stock of WHAT I was feeling, WHY I was feeling it, and then actually feeling it in all its textures with the parts of me that held it. It was becoming aware of the conflict between one part to another that created a chaotic stasis. I was seeing and feeling myself in a ways that were both amazing and difficult. Truly a bliss mess. The becomes so much more understood once you journey into heartfulness.

I am grateful for the mindfulness that lead me to this new world of ‘feeling what you are feeling as you are feeling it’. The next step beyond the awareness into the land of vulnerability and deep healing. It is the bridge between our humanity and our divinity. It is the clearing of our carbon into translucent crystal. It is the portal that connects us to the power of real love and soul expression. This is the way of SoulFullHeart.


Gabriel Heartman is an emoto-spiritual men’s and women’s facilitator, energy healer, writer, poet, and heartist with the SoulFullHeart Way of Life.  Visit https://www.soulfullheartwayoflife.com for more information about space holding sessions, group calls, videos, community, etc.

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Becoming The Birdsong: Meditations With Kuan Yin Blog Series


Note: This is a series of blog entries sharing experiences and conversations I have while meditating and opening myself to the frequencies of Kuan Yin, a female form of a Bodhisattva or enlightened, ascended teacher. To read the first in this series, please go here. 

By Jelelle Awen

Sunrise here at the Sanctuary in rural Mexico brings an orchestra of bird calls. It starts with the crooning of the rooster at the first hint of the new day and sometimes as early as four o’clock in the morning. The rooster says, “Get up! Get up! A new day! A new day!” This is the first time in my life that I have been woken up not by an alarm clock, but by an animal bred for this function. It is mostly wonderful.

The birdsong then escalates as dawn approaches, so many different kinds of chatters and trills that it seems impossible to identify them all. It is a flurry of noise and, while ‘silent’ from industrial sounds such as motors and engines, it is by no means quiet here at the Sanctuary in the early morning.

This is the time that I feel most open to meditation and connection to altered states of consciousness. I have learned to mostly ‘block out’ nature’s sounds and it becomes background music while my process takes center stage. More about the birdsong in a moment…

This morning, I am floating in “Ma Om….” mantra, seeing if my mind can let go and rest in longer stretches without actually thinking about something every few seconds. But, then it is my mind that is tracking if it can go without thinking! Sigh.

As I open to Ma Om, my two quartz crystals I am holding in my hands become burning hot with energy moving through me. Kuan Yin is more of a blur today, less solid, and more an energetic presence. I can feel Her energy but I am struggling to feel my love and adoration for Her this morning. Usually it flows through quite freely and sometimes I can even let in Her reciprocating love for me. Something is blocking my letting in capacity and I suspect it has to do with letting in love on my birthday a couple of days ago.

Then, I am suddenly engaged in an etheric conversation with Padma – who feels like a past life aspect of mine who lives(d) in India in the year 1930. Padma has been recognized as ‘born with strong Atman (internal Godhead) with a strong connection to Brahman-God.’ She tells me that she left her family at six years old to go with her Master, Nomanji, to live in his ashram and become a great yogi and saint. This is considered a great honor, but I feel her loneliness.

She is now 18 years old and can’t remember what it is like to be a ‘normal’ person. “All I do is meditate and sleep,” she tells me. I ask her if this makes her unhappy.

“If I think of what I am missing…if I think of myself as a self, then I can get sad. But, there is no ‘I’ there,” she responds.

I tell her that I want to help her feel her sadness. Immediately she admits to me that she would like to leave her Master, who is not cruel to her, but she does feel that she has outgrown him. She would like to start her own ashram and she says that there are those who want to be her devotees. I agree to support her emotional process (which she has suppressed and transcended) if she helps me with opening out my consciousness to transcendent frequencies and to liberate my mind more fully.

After we make an agreement, I feel her energy leave my presence and I am alone again with “Ma Om.” I feel more open in my heart chakra now that Padma’s sadness has moved out. This is when I become aware of the birdsong around me, which seems to have just increased suddenly in volume.

There is one particular bird that is singing at a length and volume that seems to penetrate my field.

Kuan Yin offers for me to, “Follow the birdsong,” so I do, turning my attention to it.

At first, I am just listening to the chatter back and forth of this bird and one of its kind in another tree. Then, I feel rumbles of energy move through me with each refrain from the birds. It feels like their song is inside of me. It is a jerky thing because I’m not sure if I like it at first.

Eventually I surrender to it and then I am in flight with every tweet, in motion with every twitter. It is a liberating sensation.

I try not to interpret if there is a message from the birdsong, even though I can feel how they are communicating one to me. I can feel how Kuan Yin is communicating to me through birds, which seem to be one of her favorite creatures to use as a communication medium. This is fortuitous since I happen to live on what is essentially a bird sanctuary, with some very rare and endangered species of birds here.

I just am the birdsong and I feel Kuan Yin’s encouragement. I am reminded of Her showing me a lotus and offering that it knew more about who and what it was because it didn’t know and was just arising isness. Becoming the birdsong offers the same kind of not knowing and being in isness.

The song tapers off at some point and my attention moves back to me and the start of my day here at the Sanctuary

For a few hours afterwards, as I am watering and tending to the gardens, I feel a lightness in my mind and a sense of suspended moments without mental tracking…..what I call, ‘loosened brain.’

And, I am more aware of the birdsong around me and its offering of communion, lightness, and freedom.

Jelelle Awen is a co-creator and facilitator of the SoulFullHeart Way Of Life. Visit SoulFullHeart Way Of Life  for more information . You can read her tweets here and become her friend or follow her on facebook.