The Year We Loved Our Fear


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“It is not freedom from fear you seek, but rather a relationship to it.”

I am in a new conversation with a soul aspect of mine that feels more closely aligned to my Higher Self. More polarized to love and light than the fear and darkness of so many of my other aspects I have had relationships with. His name is Aris and it is a shortened version of Aristotle. He has a Buddhist and Greek philosophers mind with an angelic aura. Very balanced in his guidance and does not seem to judge much about what is or isn’t true. It is all a quest of feeling and curiosity.

This has started as I have been continuing to feel an increased desire and call to out more of my leadership, authority, and embodiment as a healer, teacher, and creator. As a part of a community of healers, teachers, and creators, it can bring up some old frequencies of doubt, comparison, and unworth. “Who am I to be brilliant, gorgeous, talented, and fabulous?” as the famous quote goes. Yes….it is our deepest fear to face our Bigness. But more so our deepest fear is to feel that we are loved beyond infinite measure. That we ARE Inifinite Love. Right now, parts of me are still digesting the “I am loved” part. From me to me first, which lets in the beauty of the love from others and the Divine.

So I have this love flow that is arising INside, overflowing and circulating with my beloved soul family and beautiful sacred union mate. It is a good place to be with so many desires for more arising in all of us. Connecting with new worlds inside of us, growing the intention of vast travel and service of love to all BEings. “So what is the problem with that?!” I hear a voice in me asking.

It is not really a ‘problem’, I would say, but there does come a responsive arising of antithetical feelings that are based in fear, no matter the names I give them. I used to want to feel a freedom from my fear. To extinguish them. To live in a state of fearlessness. But I have come to learn from my experience and my guidance with Aris that Fear is a valuable and essential part of our existence. It is what we move through to feel the Love on the other side. It protects the preciousness of Love and those that are willing to feel the fear and heal it receive the gift in exchange. It is lessing the impact that our relationship to Fear has on parts of us that transmutes us into embodying more Love frequencies. This is the alchemical and transitional 4D consciousness we are going to all be moving into this coming year.

There will be many awarenesses that will come into focus as we move through these next months. Each one asking you to deeply feel your honest truth about your relationship with others, yourself, and daily life. There will be big reactions to those relationships inside of you and what the choice points are for you to feel in regards to what you are truly here to inhabit and how you get there. Feeling the fear undergirding it all is what moves you to the next places. This is where having a relationship with your fear and the parts of you that hold it come into play. Very sacred play. Your Highest Self is there holding space for it all as long as you are willing to feel it.

Gabriel Heartman is an emoto-spiritual men’s and women’s facilitator, energy healer, writer, poet, and heartist with the SoulFullHeart Way of Life.  Visit https://www.soulfullheartwayoflife.com for more information about space holding sessions, group calls, videos, community, etc.

Visit our patreon page to offer a money donation to support our offerings at https://www.patreon.com/soulfullheart.

 

‘Time’ Is A Co-Creation Of Love

by Kalayna Colibri

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Our relationship to ‘time’ is changing, and we’re invited to feel this more and more.

It’s not that ‘time’ is ‘evil’. Time, like money, has gotten a bad rep due to projections and the way we hold and relate to it. Aging, for example, can be a frightening concept for a few reasons… our bodies start shifting in ways we can’t control, though parts of us might work very hard to do so. Perhaps you’re one who has over-attached to this concept of aging and maybe the idea of someday ‘running out of time’ has been scary too. It feels like so many of us have come into this life with a sense of soul urgency, mistaking this feeling as a warning that we need to get somewhere (though we may not know where exactly) and fast. Of course we do only have a limited ‘time’ on this planet, yet in another way, perhaps these urgent feelings have been more about an ‘urge’ itself. A drive to keep going, to keep feeling, to keep moving forward while moving inward. It feels like parts of us can sometimes hijack these urges and make them about something else, and of course this is the veil of illusion that we signed up for in 3D anyways and something we are meant to find our way out of. The scene from Labrynth where Sarah is stuck in an illusion and forgets about her original quest to get her baby brother back comes to mind. Though in SoulFullHeart we would hold that she chose this illusion, not that Gareth or any other entity, energy or figure did it TO her.

It’s part of our awakening to realize that time is only as real as we make it and also that it’s needed to be real here on Gaia for many reasons – many of which we have yet to uncover. Time is both a man-made and a Divinely created construction. I feel like it has been offered to us as a container to press us onward into healing. It has given us a well-laid out playground to journey through 3D and find our way through the dark tunnels of 4D. It has made us acknowledge differences in ourselves and each other, contributing, if we let it, to our sense of conscious duality.  Just like money, time is an expression of love and is a mirror too. It is often seen as ‘scarce’ and held by parts and metasoul aspects of us as a source of intense stress. What we’re invited to feel now, is that time is another aspect of abundance and that it, like love, has no inherent ‘lack’, but only more of it to let in.

This may not play out literally in our lives as we know and live them, at least not in this moment on Gaia, but we can trust the infinite nature of it, and that it too was created for and WITH us. It reminds us that we co-created the reality that we now ‘know’ and that in another way, it is as infinite as we are and wants to be a part of our manifestations in this world.

Embracing time as a gift given to us for NOW, can perhaps help us feel a different relationship to it and to so many other concepts parts of us have deemed so far to be troublesome. It’s another invitation to feel that Love has already WON and there is nothing to fight here, only to tap into as it invites us to keep tapping into ourselves and our hearts.

 

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Kalayna Colibri is a SoulFullHeart facilitator for women around (and under) the age of 30, energy healer, indigo-crystal bridge, soul scribe, and poetess. Visit soulfullheartwayoflife.com for more information about space holding sessions, group calls, videos, community, etc. Visit our Patreon page to offer a money donation to support our offerings at https://www.patreon.com/soulfullheart.

The Doorways IN To Your Highest Heart

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The questions resound.  “Why am I the way I am? Why do I feel the way I feel?” There are just certain things that we just can’t really put a mental finger on.  It is swirling curiosity that is wrapped in sometimes serious tones of frustration and depression.  This feeling that something is just “off” inside and you are just not totally You.  But what the hell does that mean?

Relief and discovery are your doorways IN….

Maybe there IS a clear sense of who you are but still can’t seem to get that You to align with what it going on around you. Either no one or very few around you can fully grasp what it is you are going through. This need to go deeper, to understand and feel more deeply as to what it is that you were meant to BE this life.

Alignment and deepening are your doorways IN…

You have all that you felt like you wanted but still feel dissatisfied. What once made you complete and happy just isn’t working its magic anymore.  There is the growing awareness that that there is so much more to experience and not necessarily “learn” or achieve.   The magic is wanting to come from the inside out and not the other way around. There is a niggle to set fire to it all and get to the heart of what it is that sets your passion ablaze.

Curiosity and desire are your doorways IN….

You see the writing on the wall.  What used to hold all the pieces of society together are in a state of collapse.  The game on the outside is quickly finding its demise and the transition may be rough for some.  But that is for those who have given over their power. Their choice. The fight and the rage are getting exhausting and the time for something new is so wanting fresh air.  There is a need to feel a sense of a bigger vision and opportunity into the future.

Empowerment and disillusionment are your doorways IN….

You are tired of doing this life all on your own.  You so much want to be in collaboration with others with like-heart and soul resonance.  You ache for a partner that can match and meet you in your need for passion and purpose. To set you ablaze with aliveness and challenge you with compassionate honesty.  No more playing in the wounded arena.  You are aching for relationship beyond the usual and normal.

Community and sacred romance are your doorways IN….

There is something we all came here to walk out.  An experience to have based on a theme or calling that our souls signed up for.  Your current life experience is all perfectly laid out specifically for you, by you.  They create crisis and uncomfortability as a means of opportunity to learn and grow along the path we have chosen that serves our Highest calling.  The nest that we consciously created is now getting prickly.  Even if the nest wasn’t all that bad to begin with! You are getting prickly. Nudged. Poked.

The doorways are in front of you.  They are held by parts of us that were created in order to “survive” life. Even our spirituality has been used as a survival tactic in many ways. The road back to our very thrival essence is a process of exiting and entering many of these doorways, just like the proverbial layers of an onion.  But these doorways often look like walls if we are fused to the fear of what it means to walk through them.

The first step is to be honest there is a wall. A fear. A resistance. From there the door presents itself and the choice points begin.  Feeling the fear inside and where they come from helps us to make that next step down the path we know we were meant to walk. But you are not alone in this. There are those who have walked through many of those doors. They very ones you see in front of you if you can see them.  The ones that you have heard a knock on. Let us answer that call together and see what is discovered and experienced on the way to what it is you were ultimately destined to Be and feel.

 

Gabriel Heartman is an emoto-spiritual men’s and women’s facilitator, energy healer, writer, poet, and heartist with the SoulFullHeart Way of Life.  Visit https://www.soulfullheartwayoflife.com for more information about space holding sessions, group calls, videos, community, etc.

Visit our patreon page to offer a money donation to support our offerings at https://www.patreon.com/soulfullheart.

Money As A Mirror Of Our Relationship To Love

 

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By Raphael Awen

Let’s get real for a moment about money…not ‘brutally’ real, but lovingly and honestly real with ourselves about money and its role in our lives.

While we’re at it, let’s break the cultural silence around money. Let’s feel money’s all too real, larger-than-life role in our lives, its limitation in our choices, and also, its potential for deep rebirth inside of us.

Let’s begin this worthy quest with some ‘quest’ions. What role does money play in your sense of whether you get to lead the life you really want to or not? How much space does anxiety about money take up in your life and dictate the options you feel you have or don’t have? How do you imagine your life would look and feel different if money were no object? What current relationships in your life would be different were it not for financial necessity? Do you love the country and location where you live, or is it also more about financial necessity? What about how you earn money in the world? Is it in alignment with your deepest sense of calling and purpose, or is it more about holding down a job that you dislike or even detest? How could these tough and sensitive money questions, and the truth-telling mirror that money is, be used to either set us free or keep us small indefinitely?

So many are finding the issue of money to be one of the strongest tethers or anchors keeping them stuck in a 3D reality while they are wanting and even aching to inhabit a deep ascension process of being in tune with their higher self, their guides, and their deeper gift expression in the world. So how do we enter a new timeline where money is concerned? How can we transmute this issue of money from one of the biggest hindrances to our ascension/awakening process, into one of our greatest means of awakening?

I’d like to share with you my own personal bigger-picture lens through which I’ve come to see money. See what resonates for you as your truth, and of course, as always, pass on the rest, or shelve it for further inquiry if you’re not sure.

My truth is that we are not victims in any way to money, or to the powers that be around money, or to debt, etc, All perception of ourselves as victims of a money system gone awry is in large part, in service of a part of us wanting and needing to stay small and secure in what it knows and feels as familiar. (I’m not saying that we don’t have a corrupt money system. I’m saying that we don’t have to be subject to a corrupt money system.)

Money itself and its role in our lives is a mirror that doesn’t lie and what it so effectively mirrors is our relationship to money and ultimately our relationship to love, which is ultimately what money is – simply a carrier of energy. Finding the courage to open out this truth alone can begin a whole new wave in your world around money. If this is true, then money and its role in your life is something in your direct control. I am responsible for the current circumstances in my life around money. I am not a victim in any way around money. Not all of me may feel this is true all of the time, but this too is in my circle of influence to change.

A key piece in beginning a significant shift here is seeing that money itself is not the issue, but instead it is our relationship to money that is the issue. It’s not the thing, but our relationship to the thing that determines what is healthy or unhealthy.

Let’s shift now to weave in some practicalities around money in light of this bigger picture.

If you feel stuck in a job you don’t like, feel into how a part of you must feel something desirable about this job from its point of view, or obviously you wouldn’t be there. In getting to know this part of you, what negotiations could you come to with this part of you that would either make the job more bearable for the time being or allow you to take steps to chart a new course for yourself?

Which leads to the next piece…what is it that you really love? What is it that you would do for no money just simply for the fun of it? And what if that expression of your gift could also be your means of earning a living? What is it that expands you out as you engage in it, rather than contracts you inward? What is it that you feel called to? The word ‘career’ comes from the latin ‘vocarre’ which means ‘to call’. None of us are without a calling, some of us are just haven’t consciously heart it yet. So what steps could you take to engage in this calling expression more and more in your life? My truth is that there is always a beginning place that one is aware of, yet beginning there is a negotiation with the part of us who isn’t quite ready to begin there. Getting started there at this beginning is being on the path of sacred calling that opens out the next pieces in terms of direction, courage, and recognition by others in the world. Why would we think that offering something less in the world than our deepest gifts would be a good idea where our wellbeing is concerned? Value always flows to need and back again in a continual loop. What are you giving in the world that others need? Giving yourself to the deepest needs are what provides a deep security where material needs are concerned regardless of what’s happening ‘economically’. Seek to start your own independent economy where what you supply in the world is in high demand! This could be as simple a beginning as cleaning up trash in your neighbourhood, and gifting yourself to Gaia in this way, and adding waves of love and beauty to the world around you as you do. Starting there will lead you to your next piece as you feel into your deeper guidance around calling and purpose. You will not be without remuneration for your contribution.

Another piece is to let go of the idea of ever ‘retiring.’ You will be ever in gift exchange and contribution in the world as long as you are here. Life, if anything is a symbiosis of life exchanging with life. Here, it’s actually impossible for life not to look after you. Life begets life. Retiring, in the normal way it’s related to is to take yourself out of the contribution picture which is really taking yourself out of the life picture. You may change roles and let go of a career path, but see yourself as a deep and profound contributor as long as you have breath.

If you are living on a so called ‘fixed income’ (or from a saved nest egg), you are going to want to ‘unfix’ it. The ways you can do that are all about changing your relationship to money. Some of the most anxious people financially are people with significant savings, where the amount of anxiety actually INCREASES with the more money they have, and the longer they have it. Money itself only does good as it is transacted. Money in stasis is dead money, like fresh fruit going bad, losing value and causing anxiety as it sits there. Money in motion on the other hand is a love machine. What gifts of love could you give yourself with that money that will actually increase your trust in a benevolent universe?

And what about debt? Why on earth would you stay in commitment to old debts that you have little hope of ever paying off? This is a big way that people stay stuck using a self image picture of ‘doing the right thing’ and commit themselves to a drudgery of debt. What deeper gifts are you justifying withholding from the world as you do this so called ‘right thing’? The only debtors prison is the one you willingly remain in while the door is unlocked awaiting your courage and choice to leave. Bankruptcy is way easier than most imagine. For many, even simpler will be Debt Repudiation – just walking away from accumulated debts. The blocks to seeing and feeling this are all emotional in my truth. What gifts could you give the world after you gave yourself your self permission to break an unhealthy commitment to debt? Again, I ask ‘how could any strategy for financial security be valid if it’s about giving something less than your best gifts in the world?’ Symbiosis simply doesn’t work inside of a withhold!

Another big piece you can feel into is to gift money-as-love into places that align with your soul purpose and path. Giving money is a powerful way to plant seeds into the soil you desire to rebase your life direction and growth into. Money is only energy and all energy is sourced ultimately in love. I would love to be in a love-gift money exchange place with you if my work is a gift to you. You can do that on our Patreon page here: https://www.patreon.com/soulfullheart. Maybe fully receiving the gift I have for you can’t occur for you until you enter into a deeper reciprocity with me, and vice-versa. Again, it’s the flow of love and the flow of money in a seedtime-and-harvest reality that moves our worlds, both internally and externally.

Another big way to move your relationship to money is to see every expense you have as a ‘gift of you’ instead of a bill to pay or an obligation. You are now gifting the power company money in exchange for the gift they gave you of electricity piped into your home. Wow! You are gifting the grocery store with love-money for their love gifts to you that nourish your body. What could be more sacred? You just got all this benefit, just by giving them some digits from a computer screen or some magical pieces of paper! If you can’t give this gift with joy, you are corrupting the gift, along with your own alchemy. Maybe you should more integrously consider refusing their gift and setting up your own solar system or growing your own food if that feels more in alignment with your deepest love expression in the world. Can you feel how big this is to stop ‘paying for’ anything, to be instead in a love gift and deep gratitude exchange with everything you acquire in the world for your wellbeing? Talk about entering Golden Earth Now…! and doing it all from a change in heart…

I’m curious how this is landing in you. Can you feel a ‘new world order’ wanting to arise inside of you personally? I’d like to further help you through session space if you feel I could be of further help to you around feeling and healing the parts of you that need you to show up in a way that you haven’t up till now been able to, in order to make these kind of quantum jumps into new worlds of reality. You can read more at the following link about the session space I (and SoulFullHeart) offer… http://www.soulfullheartwayoflife.com/sessions.

The old ways of relating to money may still have some inertia as they continue to move through your life, but the very big difference is that these movements are diminishing, as new ways are arising. You are entering a new world at a rate and pace that is in alignment with feeling all there is to feel along the way. It’s in feeling this ‘all there is to feel’ as blossoming sacred humans that change happens. It is here that our inner and outer worlds are transformed.

(If you’d like to listen to a recording of an awesome recent group call that we did on money, you can do that here: SoulFullHeart Group Call – Money, Abundance, Soul Purpose, Guided Meditation)

Raphael Awen is co-creator, teacher, and facilitator of the SoulFullHeart Way Of Life.Visit soulfullheartwayoflife.com for more information about sessions, group calls, videos, community, etc. Visit our patreon page to make a donation to support our work at https://www.patreon.com/soulfullheart.