The Law Of Attraction: Being, Healing, Receiving

by Kalayna Colibri


Yesterday, I was sweetly asked by someone to share my thoughts on the Law of Attraction, based on a Facebook post I reshared from last year. The original post was a very short letter to the Universe, declaring only a couple of things I really, really wanted… one of them was a new laptop, the other a new cellphone and the third was a sacred union romance. I haven’t typically been someone to create vision boards or set goals or even write letters such as this one. I remember that when I wrote it, I was riding high on an influx of energy from having spent quality time with beloveds the day before. We in SoulFullHeart love to feel and talk about our desires and to feel the possibilities alive in them, though of course we also feel the trailing edge reality around this for parts of us who are fearful or anxious about ‘not getting what they want’.

When I reshared this year-old post, I did so to celebrate that these three desires actually DID come true. It was very sweet to feel this for several reasons, one being that for most people who earn much money, buying something like a new laptop or phone wouldn’t take them a whole year to manifest. In fact, the way so many still live is for instant gratification, trying to satisfy needs, wants and desires as soon as possible, so that the journey to actually living these desires out is as short as possible. It becomes a medication for the parts who actually feel that nothing will ever be enough for them, especially when what they really want underneath the desire for ‘things’ is love… the second reason is what this post proved to a part of me that doesn’t always trust in the Universe or the Divine or even me as the one who is holding and feeling her. Yes, it may have taken about a year to see these desires to fruition in my life, yet they did arrive and the work to bring them in happened both intentionally and unintentionally, meaning that without being directly dedicated to ‘finding’ or ‘accomplishing’, I focused my work within, as I always do. There isn’t anything we can truly control when it comes to getting what we most deeply want. Money, it feels like, can offer the 3D self a false sense of control, as do books and practices like ‘The Secret’. It really isn’t up to you to manifest what you feel you want most in your life. And it isn’t the fault of parts of you if it hasn’t manifested yet, either. So much of this is simply not up to us, and that is VERY humbling to let in…

When I went into meditation with Kuan Yin this morning, I asked her to feel the Law of Attraction with me. She had me feel my mind and my heart, both. I realized that my mind focuses on logistics and doesn’t FEEL the desire so much as thinks long and hard about how to ‘make’ it happen and all of the obstacles or problems that may ‘get in the way’, including money, of course. My heart, however, feels the desires, feels the possibilities, and gets lit up by them or doesn’t. I feel it’s the ‘lit up’ feeling within, that sends out beacons of possibility and draw and also gives the sense of what is most deeply desired, versus what is only a whim or vague possibility. The energy we hold around all possibility is a big part of drawing it to us… do parts of us or Metasoul aspects feel despair about wanting a sacred union romance? Do they feel as if they will never get what they want in a material or emotional way? Are they trying to transcend these trailing edge feelings and wanting to only feel that it’s possible? We draw mixed experiences to us as needed, to help us see and feel these parts more and more.

Perhaps it’s a matter of ‘gestation’ rather than ‘manifestation’, as Kuan Yin offered to me that ‘being’ your way and feeling your way to your desires is really the only path to bringing them in, at least when it comes to the deeper ones. Drawing in a sacred union romance is about BEing, giving space to parts of you, healing your way to it. Finding yourself a new cellphone or laptop can feel just as magical as letting in a romance if the time is taken to be and feel your way there and not necessarily ‘take action’ or ‘set goals’. The same could be set for weight loss or money-earning. There is so much to be and be with as we become… as we continue to shift inside of ourselves through the inner excavation process of deep feeling that we offer in SoulFullHeart.  As we do so, the steps unfold and alignment happens in an organic, flowing, flowering way, especially in these days of ramped-up Ascension energies, where this is becoming the reality more and more easily as our energies continue to move upward.

Attracting or drawing what we most want, begins with feeling the wants, working our way to feeling what’s real about them and what deeper desires could be underneath them, helping us detach from the outcome in humble surrender. We are brilliant co-creators as arising sacred humans, work consciously and unconsciously in tandem with energies in the multi-verse inside and outside of us, and those around us who fill us up with love while we offer and BE the same to and with them. If it’s really about love underneath it all, then love is what needs to be present in our hearts, in an ever-deepening way through our healing, in order to truly reach those heights of BEing that we feel called to bring in, in whatever form or fabric that takes in our unfolding 3D-5D reality consciousness. ❤

If you wish to learn more about the SoulFullHeart process, visit for more information.

Also, THIS coming Sunday, Raphael and Jelelle Awen will be hosting a live stream on Facebook and Youtube! Check it out, starting at 11:11am CST (Mexico City).


Kalayna Colibri is a SoulFullHeart facilitator for women around (and under) the age of 30, energy healer, indigo-crystal bridge, soul scribe, and poetess.  Visit for more information about space holding sessions, group calls, videos, community, etc. Visit our Patreon page to offer a money donation to support our offerings at


Feeling Our Relationships And Our Ascension


By Leena Colibri


Starting in recent weeks, every night has carried with it an intensity in my heart, energetic field and body. I feel as if I am surrounded. I dream very intense, very real-feeling dreams. I also feel energies moving up and down my body, both on the inside and outside. My sleep is often interrupted as these energies move through and there is a feeling of my bedroom being very full of beings, energetics, shapes, colours, and the imprints of the dreams I’ve been having that feel more like walking something out than anything intangible. I don’t always remember every detail, but I do keep the feeling of it all within me, and quite often, as I do right now, I feel “cleaned out” by morning somehow.

I remember having a dream last night that felt personal and global. I was moving through a romantic relationship that wasn’t deep but for part of me was “enough” simply because he gave me “just” enough attention and affection. I was in the process of leaving the bond because I had plans to move somewhere far away and we knew we wouldn’t be able to continue our relationship. At the last minute though, I wanted to change my mind about leaving, even though my gut and heart both said that I actually wasn’t deeply satisfied by this bond anyways and was actually ready to move on from it. It felt as if I was trying to deny my destiny. When I tried to tell him about changing my mind and wanting to stay with him, he had already detached from me and I was already fading from his life and awareness. Just before I woke up I had been trying desperately to get his attention again. This feels like a pattern I’ve lived out in a few relationships but also, it feels like this is what is happening or about to happen in relationships of all kinds. We are entering a time during our ascension as a species, where relationships of all kinds will be challenged. Letting go with full hearts and appreciation for what was is what’s being asked of us now even as we also learn to be with ourselves in the grief and pain of separation. We can never truly be separate and whatever is real between souls and hearts cannot disappear forever, but not everyone or everything will be able to come with us on our very personal, yet somehow deeply connected, journeys of healing Ascension.

Relationships are a major thing for us as humans. We are meant to be social and for many of us, our hearts consciously long for community and of course, deep romantic love. Each and every tie we have to a person or even a habit or animal or object is something to feel into now as we continue our process of purification and remembering who we really are as part of Infinite Love. There is no end point to the Ascension journey but there seem to be specific markers that guide our way. Feeling any restlessness or doubt in our relationships or maybe even body symptoms when we are around certain people are very strong indicators that we should consider reevaluating and feeling what it is we really want to experience inside relationship with others. Many of us will be challenged with having to move through layers of doubts around our own self-worth and even the beauty of our essence. Letting these doubts surface and making space to feel them is sacred as it aids us in our forward movements that bring us healing and help us move out of 3D consciousness.

There is an invitation that I feel with softness in my heart as I bring this to you. The shifting times we are living in do not promise an easy ride, though they do want us to feel where the letting go is most difficult for us. It often is not a simple process, as I’ve experienced myself. The more aligned we become in relationship to ourselves, however, the easier it is to see and feel what a truly sacred relationship is and we can begin to draw those who are our true soul family and soul mates. Nothing anchors our healing and ascension more than having loving, non-codependent support around us.



Leena Colibri is a SoulFullHeart facilitator, writer and poetess. Find out more about the SoulFullHeart Way of Life at

It’s our relationship to Desire that matters, not suppressing it

By Raphael Awen


Possibly the single most difficult challenge in life is dealing with desire.

Think about it for a moment. Without desire, there wouldn’t be such things as addictions, no need for medications or drugs of any kind. No need for anything really. Sex, food, a new iphone, you name it, all of it no longer sought after. There wouldn’t be any conflict, as that’s all based on desire, so there’s the whole ‘world peace’ issue solved. No more internal conflicts either, so no more need for any spiritual teachers like myself offering ‘more’ in some form or another. There wouldn’t be any possibility of being taken advantage of, nor sold anything, because all that too begins and ends with desire.

What comes up for many of us in feeling this burden of desire that we carry is a desire to return to the place of no desire, to return to source. We can feel a realm of bliss and contentment where we were free from the tyranny of desire. But, to enter this place, we feel a desire to unburden ourselves of this seeming plague of desire that overwhelms us. Did you get that? Desire to exit desire? Argh! Give it an inch and it takes a mile.

The other day, in the evening, I walked down the hill to the beach seawall and stopped in for some ice-cream. It was chocolate mint with crunchy chocolate chunks in it. It tasted out of this world. I knew it was a sugar bomb and of no food value whatsoever, but it was just too good and too satisfying to say no too. Then, the next evening, the idea came back again, and guess what? More chocolate mint. That night at around 3 am, there was a sugar bomb explosion that gave me a headache. Now the chocolate mint wasn’t so much my friend anymore. Lesson learned right? Well, actually, no, because the idea came back around on the third night in a row and guess what? MORE Chocolate Mint, and yet another early morning hangover. Talk about addicted, I couldn’t even try a different flavour.

So, what’s the solution? The idea of some ‘self control’ comes up first with a bit of a punishing energy. “Once in a blue moon as a treat, is fine, but….”. But this too is the voice of another desire, desire wanting to control desire.

When you stop to feel through it, there isn’t a single problem that you have in any area that can’t be traced back directly to the issue of desire.

So, let’s leave this plagued world of desire then, right? To hell with desire. Let’s kill off all desire. What’s left could only be total bliss.

But we’d have to exit nature for sure, because even trees have desire. We’d have to shed the body, because it too is a demon of desire, food, sex, nikes and all. And then what we’re left with is being disembodied spirits who live in the bliss of escape from the pain of all desire. If this is true, then suicide is the greatest virtue.

But, think a bit further here. The question comes up if I would really be free of all desire after death. If I’m still existing, but outside of the body, I won’t be at the ice-cream shop any time soon, but wouldn’t I still be in some realm of desire?

It feels to me like the oneness source that we were birthed out of, the one that we can feel a longing to return to, is actually an energy of discontentment within its contentment. If God, or oneness, or non-duality was so blissfully fulfilled (filled to the full), why did it create outside of itself, beings who would be dependent upon desire?

The answer I can feel around this one and humbly offer as a ‘near as I can tell’ is that God had desire. I know that sounds blasphemous to our conditioned minds, but God wasn’t filled to the full. And God isn’t filled to the full. And God is out ‘godding’ around through you and me in this utter cacophony of desire that has been unleashed upon us.


Because God in its utter and total fulfillment, felt a need to step outside of itself, which it actually can’t do, but decided to try anyway and provide the illusion of separation from God as a learning and discovery ground seeking to come to know more of its infinite nature.

God is in the 18 year old out trying to get laid. God was in my ice-cream binge. God is in my desire to write this morning. God is in you as you read this.

Here’s the secret though. The separation you feel between you and God isn’t real. It just needed to feel real enough for the experiment to work. What happens to infinite love when it ventures outside of itself, when it lets itself feel the wanting of something more than the most it already has?

We don’t actually know and neither does God, but desire was again found utterly unstoppable here. God couldn’t self discipline itself to stay inside of any kind of safe boundaries. Love left itself up to love. If love is anything, it is free of control. “But, how can that work” we all ask, including the part of me afraid of my next ice-cream binge?

How about this as a solution? What if instead of killing desire, what I actually need is to go deeper into desire? What is it that I really want? What did the ice cream represent that it was capable of representing but not fulfilling? It takes as many ice-cream binges as it takes to figure this out, and love itself can hold every one of them. Even self destruction is held in love, because every destruction cannot escape the love that you are and that you never ever actually left.


To kill desire, you’d have to kill God.The word for this is ‘deicide.’ That’s why suicide is so offensive, it’s actually deicide and suppressing desire is actually fighting God.

You can embrace the utter contentment that you are and bask in its fullness, just don’t think that you won’t have desires inside of that. It’s a crazy thing, but there isn’t any fulfillment in fulfillment in an infinite world. ‘Full’ isn’t ultimately real, only ‘full for now’ is real.

Love wants to explore through you and it can also feel you in this burden it thrust upon you of offloading it’s very desire nature into you. Like a crack addicted mother passing off its craving into an unborn fetus, it can be seen as a tragedy, or it can be seen as love itself being utterly and uncontrollably addicted to love.

We are in a love experiment. Nothing more or less. Even hatred is contained by love.

In SoulFullHeart, we offer a way to get to know and explore the many parts of ourselves or subpersonalities. Here is where your overall relationship to desire can be felt through. Here, we can begin to differentiate each part of us and their relationship to desire. Without this, we remain fused to this civil war of desire inside of us. Check out for more.

Raphael Awen is co-creator, teacher, and facilitator of the SoulFullHeart Way Of Life. Visit for more information and Raphael’s facebook page for more writing.