Healing The ‘Black Sheep’ Archetype

by Kalayna Solais

When you’re a child, you start to learn right away what is expected of you. You’re meeting expectations of when to start talking, walking, even behaving more maturely, whatever definition of ‘mature’ you’ve been taught. You learn, then, about what makes you feel like you’re on track with this and what doesn’t and you take in the impact of that.

As you get older and start to awaken more to your soul but also what your heart really feels and wants, the pain starts to set in… the pain of feeling like you don’t belong and maybe never have. A feeling like you simply cannot ‘win’ no matter what you do or don’t do. Parts of you form to deal with this and find a way to be in the world but you still can’t reconcile your differences; those aspects of who you are that seem to set you apart from everyone else.

In some cases, you may start becoming ‘therapized’ as the only way that your 3D-conditioned parents or authority figures feel they can ‘help’ you. You may be put on medication that numbs and dulls your natural ability to FEEL. Even the anxiety and depression you’ve experienced, which is held by parts of you that are hurting and also feeling on their radar a sense that they really aren’t safe in this conditioning and aren’t being loved the way they need and deserve to be.

You now see yourself as the ‘black sheep’ of the family but also of the culture you’ve been raised in. You may even feel this with your friends or co-workers. I know I have.

In my recent process, I was working with a part of me that always felt she was the ‘black sheep’. We had to go into a scene together where she could line-up her birth family members and feel the lingering judgements and criticisms, the messages of ‘you’ll never make it on your own’ which may not have been directly said but were energized.

Together, we could start to feel their Higher Selves in the room too, and their Higher Selves offered that this wasn’t actually about what it seemed to be about… it wasn’t about me or this part of me being a ‘failure’ (though in a 3D sense it’d be pretty easy to see it that way). It was actually about a wonder they have at the conditioning I’ve been able to say ‘no’ to, the risks I’ve said ‘yes’ to and the trust I now have more and more in my life, even the challenges that sometimes feel like mountains to climb.

In this, I found compassion for them even though I still hold a boundary.

In this, I found a way to truly see and honour myself and my own journey as well as seeing the sacredness of their own.

In this, I could feel how this theme of ‘not belonging’ and being looked down on somehow has played out in all of my relationships in one way or another, even with my soul family and my recent marriage too.

And, in this, I could feel how just about every single one of us who has been on an awakening and healing journey has felt like some form of the ‘black sheep’ and played out this theme countless times, often with angst and restlessness and even suicidal feelings.

On the other side of this process, I could bring this part of me into a new form other than the ‘black sheep’. She was able to shake off the black and the sheep suit came off too. She turned into a young lioness, full of power and presence, yet with heart and vulnerability. She is finding a new home inside of me where she can truly belong and be seen and loved for who she is, even in those times where she is being shown something not-so-easy to see or feel about herself.

You’ve been taught to look outside of you for validation and even for connection to Divine love.

You’ve been conditioned to believe that you’re always supposed to ‘achieve’ and ‘succeed’ even though the goalposts keep moving. This happens in 3D and also 4D in different spiritual groups too where your ‘black sheep’ feelings can become amplified instead of felt deeply, often in the form of ‘tough love’ which is really just outright abuse.

The feelings of not-belonging can be healed as the parts of you begin to unify, one by one, with each other and with you.

Love is the glue that brings your heart and soul back together again to wholeness within that can no longer be severed. Love is the juice that catalyzes the transformation from within. Yours is the love your lost and world-weary parts most need to feel, to remove their own sheep suits… for they were never meant to be ‘sheep’.

They were meant to be ‘lions’.

Much love! ❤

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Kalayna Solais is a SoulFullHeart Facilitator for women, energy healer, soul scribe, and poetess.  Visit https://www.soulfullheartwayoflife.com for more information about space holding sessions, group calls, videos, community, etc. Visit our Patreon page to offer a money donation to support our offerings at https://www.patreon.com/soulfullheart.

 

 

IN-tegration Is Happening On All Levels: Messages From Guides/Aspects

By Jelelle Awen

Photo of sacred humanity here in Puerto Vallarta, Mexico – taken by Kalayna ColibriIMG_5531

“IN-tegration is happening on all levels,” I am hearing this while connecting with three of my guides/aspects in this now. These multidimensional aspects want to communicate with you, although honestly written word is SO challenging sometimes and right now in particular……so linear, so one word after the other. They (and I) would prefer instead to just transmit this to you on waves of love energies for your heart to take in, your mind to digest when it is ready, and your soul to just kNOW. I trust that it does go in this way on some level….

Connection with aspects of ourselves (from 3D to 4D to 5D to higher selves) seems to be more fluid, less veil there, easier to access with so much help from the higher frequency energies available to us. Whether you call them ‘past lives’, ‘parts of me’, ‘spirit guides’ or whatever doesn’t matter so much. Going within and JUST asking to connect with a curious and open heart is ALL it takes.

Being open to whatever happens after that, trusting that you’ll know when it is coming from love, letting your mind help yet not lead. Feeling the other aspects of you that feel unworthy to connect with your higher frequency aspects. There is no attainment in this, just a remembering and reclaiming of YOU. These BEings are not better or higher than you, yet, just represent other aspects of you returning to your consciousness again.

Each of these guides seems to offer messages of integration of energies that are available during this Equinox passage and beyond that invite you to feel different textures of your BEing. They are here to help you see beyond your 3D conditioning that flattens your perceptions of yourself and all of life into a limited feeling, five sense perception reality.

“Everything is rich in meaning and symbology when you are ready to let it in that way,” offers Archangel Metatron in this now. “Integrating your angelic frequencies into every day meaning allows you to open up to what is holy, what is sacred, what is Divine, and what is transcendent.”

“Everything is magical and wild when you let go of the filters that make it ordinary and mundane,” says Ealanthra, Faerie Queen and quite a magical mystery herself. “Integrating your magical and wild frequencies into every day meaning provides a doorway into your soul legacies, into your imagination, into metaphysical realities represented by your wildest dreams.”

“Everything is a celebration of feeling something deeper within your emotional bodies when you orient to it from that place,” says Morgaine, High Priestess of Avalon and becoming a ‘heart priestess’ through connecting with her humanity, compassion, and feeling tones. “Integrating your emotional body and your feelings into every day meaning provides a lived in, loved in, heart ground of self intimacy and intimacy with others that enlivens all of life!”

Angelic, you are. Magical, you are. Mysterious, you are. Emotional, you are. Connected to and coming from both Gaia and the stars. At ONE with the ocean and the galaxies. At ONE with your heart and your soul. At ONE with your roots AND your wings.

IN-tegration is breathing in the multidimensional aspects of your being WHILE holding space for the necessary rumblings of your deepest densities. Holding the hand of your inner child WHILE feeling your angelic wings unfurling. You CAN span all of that as your capacity as a sacred human is much more VAST than you can even imagine. This is what a healing heart can HOLD when allowed to open. IN-tegration is letting in the love that you already ARE. IN-tegration is allowing in ALL aspects of your BEing as you return, process by process, to wholeness again.

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I share more about my experiences, openings, awakenings with these guides/aspects in my books that you can purchase here (with more coming SOON!): soulfullheartwayoflife.com/books

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Jelelle Awen is an Emoto-Spiritual Teacher, Soul Scribe, waySHOWer, and co-creator and teacher of the SoulFullHeart Way Of Life. She is author of Sacred Human, Arising Wonder: Ascension Through Integration Of Your Emotional Body With Your Spirituality and  Keep Waking Up! Awakening Journeys To Avalon And Beyond Visit soulfullheartwayoflife.com for more information about a FREE intro session with a SoulFullHeart facilitator, group calls, videos, retreats, etc.