Awakening To Purpose With Lilith

By Deva Yasmin

Lilith is coming very close to me right now, I feel her presence wanting to be known in these times. She is the form of Divine Mother who serves us to find stability in the shadows of the unknown, to feel safety in the darkness between worlds, anchoring us in the moment between death and rebirth, the place of all Life. 

Lilith is the activating force of the feminine, helping us create, when we do not know what for, or why, or even if we have anything to share that will be of service to others. She helps us trust the feminine and surrender to the outcome of our service. She knows we all hold in our hearts different parts of the Awakening puzzle that will reach where they need to go IN.

She also serves, as a soothing balm to our masculine. In times when his abilities to pursue, to take action and to know the way forth are less called for, Lilith helps him rest. Reminding him to conserve his energy for the moments when his driving force to move ahead is really needed. 

These complimentary forces are being offered healing NOW, especially through relationships, as we may be feeling rumbles in our time of separation from each other or being together more than usual. I feel this as an opportunity to feel how these forces have been in opposition or suppression of each other, how they have longed for but can be scared of each other at the same time. An opportunity to heal what is needed on the inside, to move more into collaboration between the Feminine and Masculine.

In relationships with others, especially intimate ones, I feel this to be the inner work needed to support the outer union and its empowered collaboration. It feels like the work to feel what is real between us, if there is still ground to transact together so we can move forward united, honoring, respecting and prepared to listen to one another, and if not, it may perhaps be time to move on, to honor the inner union more. This is something myself and James have been navigating since being together more at home. This time is gifting us so much healing, as we have felt what has gone unnoticed or pushed aside in the general busyness of day to day life and the ways parts of us have not been working together.

Lilith’s honesty is supporting me to navigate what is needing to change in my life, I feel her offering to hold my hand as parts of me still have fear of hurting others or being judged by others when being true to myself. This has held me back for a long time and she has come now to support me to move into true alignment with my Soul’s purpose. She is here to guide and activate in us ALL, the knowing that when we are called towards service of Divine Love, at times we will be asked to make hard choices that may impact others. Some will not understand but that does NOT mean you are doing anything wrong or a bad person.

As children it feels like our choices, if not in alignment with the beliefs of our care givers, can be seen as ‘wrong’ when we know what we want but that creates tension in our care givers or hinders their own schedules, and we can be called ‘bad’ or ‘naughty’. This was not the truth. We knew as children we did not come here to fit in, we came here with a purpose.  But we had to take part in the suppression because that was part of our assignment on Earth, to be conditioned and forget so we could learn, awakening through the pains of being human. This has been our school so we could grow into the embodiment of Love and compassion, allowing Life to serve through us when the time came and NOW is that time.

Lilith wants to help us release the limitations of the conditioning that has been placed on us, revealing to us what has been keeping us stuck in the shadows. She comes to ALL of those who are ready NOW to move into service, even if that is deeply serving ourselves in a NEW way. Both serving ourselves and serving others is serving the Whole, but serving others without truly serving ourselves first, is a part of our conditioning. The belief that self-care or considering the needs of yourself is selfish, is not true. If we had learned to deeply care for ourselves, I wonder how the world would have looked? 

Service led by Love, this is the possibility that is becoming available to us more and more. As the invitation in New Earth is to serve Love to Love from Love, rather than fear serving more fear. 

Thank you for being here and for all that you are, which is already a huge service to Love. This Life would not be possible without you in it, your unique individuality is a gift and there is no one who can play the part you do. 

Much Love,

Deva and Lilith.

Deva Yasmin is a SoulFullHeart Facilitant. Visit https://www.soulfullheartwayoflife.com for more information about space holding sessions, group calls, videos, community, etc

 

 

Inner Community Healing, Paving The Way For 5D CommUNITY With Others

By Deva Yasmin

To be in community is a deep desire and calling in my heart, the desire started to burn for this more as I opened to spirituality. I can feel how this desire for community has run deep my whole life, it feels like it was the reason I spent many years working in the Hospitality industry, as there is a sense of togetherness that comes when working so closely and intensely with a group of people in a restaurant. It feels like the longing for community has also been my greatest pain, especially growing up in an environment and society where I felt I never fitted in. Right now, I am feeling with my parts the extent of this pain as I continue to unravel myself from it.

One of the draws for me to re-enter sessions with SoulFullHeart was the community. I had sessions for 6 months in 2017. It feels like I had to take a step back and explore other things to really let in what SoulFullHeart is offering. Even though I wasn’t engaged in sessions, I was witnessing through social media and within the group something very unique. I feel that what I have longed for within community, SoulFullHeart are on the leading edge of. Beings who are committed to showing up for their own inner healing and Ascension whilst at the same time learning to bridge that into relationships, through parts work.

As I expressed this desire for community in my session with Jelelle Awen, she invited me into a NEW way of feeling and letting in community, beginning first on the inside. This has been massively liberating for parts of me because within this deep desire for community with others has been a deeper longing and pain of not belonging and of feeling unsafe. Something parts of me could actually not find anywhere else, because all along they had needed to find that within ME. With these parts leading the way I feel how they drew souls who kept reflecting and confirming to me that I could not find what they were seeking outside. This caused much pain.

I see now how this also led these parts to continue and stay in unhealthy relationships for too long, to feel some sense of security and safety. This is a deeply vulnerable and at times painful process I am navigating right now, which I will reveal more about in time as my parts stabilize and ground in the safety of Infinite Love. That IS coming through even more as I turn my desire towards nurturing and tending my inner community, rather than overly focusing on, tending to or care taking others in exchange for a sense of belonging, Love and purpose.

I feel I am getting right to the core of what has been holding my parts in pain and with us all now feeling each other, there is a new level of honesty that is transmuting and transforming places I have felt stuck in for so long. This feels possible because I am learning through the SoulFullHeart process how to feel the inner dynamics and relationships of parts and aspects of myself.

As my parts are digesting and healing their experiences with me, they are beginning to receive the Love and acceptance they have always longed for. This is helping ME find the courage to BE and express more of who I AM, as a Soul. I find my way of being in life shifting as I calibrate to the SoulFullHeart Way Of Life. The process is becoming more about receiving Love and support from within. Then responding to the parts AS they show up, that still do not know how to receive, feel unworthy of receiving or are still distrustful of Love because of the trauma they have experienced in the past, in this life and others.

This is rumbling throughout my life, as I am now feeling what it feels like to BE loved, to BE validated and to BE heard. My desire for this on the outside is growing, meaning it is becoming harder to continue what parts of me have until now accepted as love and connection with other. It’s a really challenging time, as I collapse the compartments of my life, to restore balance and wholeness to my inner and outer realities. It is surprising me at times how quickly this process is shifting things just from feeling how parts have lived and why.

There is an empowerment happening it feels of my Soul Bigness, my 4D/5D selves and all the aspects of me who KNOW what Love and commUNITY are truly meant to be already. As I feel and heal my 3D parts and experiences, more space is opening out for these higher aspects to come in to my awareness, my body and my life, supporting me to move into alignment with my Soul Expression and Service in this life.

Working with parts is guiding me towards and opening me to higher timeline possibilities that have felt impossible until now and hard to manifest. I have known since before I can remember that this 3D way of life is too limited, it has never felt like the path I came here to settle in. Now I know it is because I came here to create rumbles in it and be part of Ascension on Earth Now. Though I have tried many times to step into something NEW, without all my parts consciously co creating and on board, I have had to circle back in, to feel them and integrate, so I can walk with them across the bridge into the NEW with Love, rather than jumping off the cliff where the unknown can feel like an abyss. This making the death/rebirth cycles we all go through more chaotic than catalytic.

This feels like a continuous, multi layered, multi dimensional experience of Ascending within 3D, not getting out of it. Bridging and weaving Fifth Dimensional Consciousness into the fabric of it, shifting our individual and collective consciousness from the INside, out.

We explored walking gracefully across the bridge into the NEW rather than jumping off the cliff in yesterday’s monthly group call . These calls are a huge highlight of my month, along with my sessions and the monthly Women’s call. I feel the co-creation that is happening between our souls, how the joint desire for Golden Earth is creating the reality I feel so many of us Knowing and Longing for.

If you’d like to purchase the recording of this call, you can through https://www.soulfullheartwayoflife.com/product-page/12-yeshua-magdalene-consciousness-activation-raphael-jelelle-awen or offer $15 CAD via paypal.me/jelelleawen

Much Love

Deva x

Deva Yasmin is a SoulFullHeart Facilitant. Visit https://www.soulfullheartwayoflife.com for more information about space holding sessions, group calls, videos, community, etc

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

Yeshua Christ/Magdalene Transmission Group Call Saturday, March 7 2020 W/Raphael & Jelelle Awen

Our Monthly Group Transmission
& Guided Meditation Group Call

with Raphael & Jelelle Awen

Hello Beloved Soul,

The increasingly catalytic energies of 2020 are supporting shifts into your higher timeline life through the continual thinning of veils of amnesia and soul activations. As we move into this month of March, more connections can be made to your soul’s lineage and your soul purpose of service here in this lifetime to assist seeding light in the darkness for yourself and others as Ascension progresses. 

The previous limiting beliefs, conditionings/programs from 3D reality, and traumas at the self/soul levels are able to be connected with, loved, and dissolved! 

Join our sweetly growing community of souls for our monthly group call over Zoom on Saturday, March 7th at 10:00am PST (Vancouver, Canada time)! We will be united in the purpose and draw of remembering our Magdalene lineage and embodying our indwelling cosmic Christ consciousness! 

Please read this message from the Magdalenes to see if it sparks your heart and soul remembrance and desire to join us: https://soulfullheartblog.com/2020/02/11/you-are-here-to-seed-light-in-the-darkness-message-from-the-magdalenes/

  • All are welcome. We do ask for a $15 CAD/$11 USD energy exchange for a deeper letting in and claim to receive the transmission. 
  • Powerful teachings and guided meditation. Raphael and Jelelle will teach about the Yeshua/Magdalene lineage and provide a deep and effective meditation to transmit these energies to you.
  • Resonant Soul Family experience. Those joining the call will be in resonance with these energies and ALL help to amplify and broadcast them. You will have the opportunity to hear others share on this journey and to share yourself if you wish to.
  • You can be ANYWHERE in the world and listen to the recording at any time. You can join us from anywhere over Zoom. And you can also listen to the recording whenever you want and need to. 

Much love,
Raphael and Jelelle

REGISTER HERE

Testimonials From Previous Calls:

“Deep GRATITUDE for the gathering today! Can’t deny I crave more community time! Thank you for the many gifts today, for seeing me and shining light on my heart!” Isabela, group participant

“I feel high on love still! I have never experienced anything like these ‘love baths’ that these calls offer me.” Deva, group participant

“I’m so grateful to be a part of this community again and feel my heart opening more and more and was so grateful to feel and help heal some deep wounds today. Thank you all so much. It was a wonderful experience.” Kallai, group participant
 

Our email address is:
soulfullhearts@gmail.com

 

Going Within To Love More Of Me, To Let In More Love With You

By Deva Yasmin

Being in a sacred union pushes up all that is hidden, that wants to stay safe and protected from Love.

Even though I have desired so badly to experience Love, now that it is here I get the opportunity to see all the defenses and ways I have unconsciously been pushing it away at the same time.

I longed to meet the one who would stay and Be with all of me, not yet realizing the one IS me. And HAS to be me first, to truly let Love in with another.

I see now how past relationships that couldn’t stay and be with all of me were a reflection of my own inability to accept, love and be present to myself.

Since meeting James, I have constantly been gifted the opportunity to see, feel and start to heal all the places that still push love away. As my heart desires to expand to let in all the goodness there is between us, those painful places of rage, anger, grief have been coming up to be vulnerably felt, to soften as they receive compassion allowing them to return to their original love source. Clearing space in my heart to let love flow through again.

I feel how his ability to stay grounded and true to himself as these emotions surface, now reflects my own ability to do the same for myself.

I see now that to have a fulfilling relationship, to open to all the love, goodness and passion we so desire, it is an INside job.

That the goodness can lie dormant under the frozen parts of our hearts and souls, until thawed out by the light of our conscious, loving, curious attention.

It feels like the ability to stay here, for ALL experiences especially the uncomfortable ones is the ground where trust is built. To be able to express ALL parts of myself and feel I am safe and deserve love for ALL of who I am, is giving me the space to heal from the story that I need to be ‘good’ in order to be loved.

Through this process I feel the liberation of our authentic joy, our innocence, our ability to love without conditions because when we feel we are loved in our shadow then we can finally feel safe to express the full spectrum of our light.

When pain arises in a relationship, it feels so engrained in us to overfocus on what needs to change within the relationship. It feels new to make going withIN to feel the frozen, hidden parts of ourselves priority, which organically shifts the ground of our togetherness.

This is what myself and James are constantly realizing since beginning individual sessions with Jelelle and Raphael. That to face the pain within ourselves first, truly transforms our relationship. To go INwards, focusing instead on our own inner relationships with parts of us, gives us a new understanding, empathy and way of BEing, with each other.

That is totally delicious and worth all the ‘effort’ it feels it takes, to align to this new way of REALating….

Much Love,

Deva Yasmin

***

Deva Yasmin is a SoulFullHeart facilitant.  Visit https://www.soulfullheartwayoflife.com for more information about space holding sessions, group calls, videos, community, etc.

Heart-warm Closure With The Men Of My ‘Past’

by Kalayna Solais

Last night before going to sleep, some really sweet energies moved through my heart space that I so wasn’t expecting, but I welcomed it all fully. I felt invited to think about the men I’ve been with or ‘almost’ been with in romantic relationships. The ones who parts of me felt rejected by for some reason, the ones who kept me in the “friend zone”. The ones I made love with or talked about making love with. The ones I wanted to marry. The one I did. The ones I “friend-zoned” and sometimes felt confused about. The handsome ones… well, they were all handsome, let’s be honest. And I loved all of them.

In all of this I felt how much I STILL love them. And a genuine appreciation for them, and whatever relationship we had or didn’t have. I learned a lot from each of them. And somehow, up until last night, parts of me and Metasoul aspects in other lifetimes too, felt primarily rejected or cast aside or ignored… or simply unworthy, not good enough, and made it seem to themselves like these patterns of “not ever” being with a deeply passionate man who can truly meet me in all ways, “stay in the room” with me, explore his King’s leading and trailing edges while I explore my Queen’s, would last forever.

There’s no romantic companion in my field at the moment. No prospects or crushes beyond the etheric ‘mate’ I can sometimes see and feel. Yet, I felt guided to keep feeling this through. And for the first time, I could see not only the gift of each of these connections I’ve had, but the gift of ME that’s come out of each of them and the ways in which they were each able to adore and love me, no matter how complicated it was or wasn’t between us on a romantic or even just a friendship level. My own Inner Masculine took notes throughout all of these connections, I’ve realized, and decided from each of them what he would take with him and what he would help me say “no” to in the future, even within him, himself, in my relationship to him as an Inner Father, Protector, and Mate too.

My personal process is so deep for me that no matter what happens in my life, I “mine” it for the golden nuggets, the exquisite diamonds, of personal growth and healing on a heart and soul level. I have looked deep into the mirrors of all of these relationships with still more layers emerging, and I’ve been willing to let that show me what the truth of ME has been throughout it all; which parts of me were hiding or activated and where/why, which Metasoul aspects were feeling the pain and the sting (and also the joy and lust) in their own timelines.

All of this exploration has been rich beyond measure and I’m still reaping the rewards of these inward journeys. It’s because of this work that I’m able to, for the very first time, HONESTLY say “I am GRATEFUL for it all… for every cut, every bruise… every loving touch, every hug and kiss… every unconscious choice and every conscious one too.” If any of these men are reading this (many of them probably won’t because I’m not connected to them anymore… but I know their Higher Selves are listening and feeling this) I want them to know how much I can feel the adoration I and parts of me have always had for them on many levels, even with the impact we had on each other and the fear-based choices that sometimes overtook the love-based ones. We’ve helped shape each other into the people we are now and I know in my soul that I needed every single one of you.

Maybe now we can move even more fully into whatever is next for all of us.

Much love to you as these Valentine’s Day energies bring out whatever you may need or want to feel through in your own romantic life or even just with regard to the Sacred Union within…

Kalayna

***

Kalayna Solais is a SoulFullHeart facilitant, soul scribe, and poetess.  Visit https://www.soulfullheartwayoflife.com for more information about space holding sessions, group calls, videos, community, etc.

Gratitude For A Decade Of Sacred Union On New Year’s Eve

By Jelelle Awen

Happy New Year’s Eve! As this decade completes and I reflect on the last ten years, what comes up in my heart is my relationship with the beautiful, genuine, enchanting man that I’ve gotten to spend it with. This relationship has provided the experience of being in an ‘usness’ yet it has also been a powerful mirror to see, feel, come to know, and express myself increasingly in my soul bigness and leading with my heart.

Raphael Awen and I married ten years ago in March, following a longing to be together that had already dissolved previous configurations in our lives that were no longer serving us. We let go of a previously beloved spiritual group and all of our social connections tied to that group and settled into a new geography together. This picture was taken on our wedding day in a studio apartment in West Vancouver, where we still didn’t even have any furniture together!

We continue every day to consciously choose this relationship as our main way to grow and learn and serve….yet it isn’t taken for granted or just assumed to be there or related to in an entitled way. It arises as we arise….inviting us into ever deeper waters of transparency together. I feel so blessed to be in this exploration with a soul who so GETS me on every level.

~

Raphael….Thank you my beloved for this ongoing exploration into intimacy, vulnerability, transparency, sacred sexuality, co-leadership in service and community, parts/Metasoul integration and quantum healing, daily living as a sacred practice, embodiment of the Divine as a man and woman….and SO MUCH more. I love you and thank you for spending these last ten years with me…..here’s to many more!!

~

 

From Raphael:

Everything for me in this past decade pales in comparison to the gift, growth, challenge, and magic of being so in life and love with you, Jelelle.

The phases we have gone through, even of ending the relationship this past year in a death and rebirth cycle, have renewed the lease on togetherness yet again.

On one hand, I have felt both stunned at the ongoing magic with no reference or experience point for it outside of myself, and no file for it, other that digesting it together, as well as allowing our ‘usness’ to inspire others. On the other hand, I’ve had to normalize the relationship to enough of a degree to be in it everyday, almost what feels like a taking it for granted. Between those two hands, I’m invited to keep feeling all there is to feel for my own growth, for our deepening service of love together and where that wishes to take me.

Thank you, Jelelle for being so fully here, in this ‘this’ together. I love you. 😍 Thank you for the honeymoon giggly anticipation of another decade together.

Energy Update: Upcoming 12/12 Gateway/Full Moon Supporting Revelations & Completions

By Jelelle Awen

As Raphael and I were on a wonderful hike in the woods yesterday, we digested together about how a year ago were going through a brief, yet painful separation from each other. It was the first time in over ten years that we purposely needed to spend time apart to feel into what we wanted in the relationship and in our lives. It was a shock to be going through that crucible as we had just moved into our spacious house here in Victoria and into what we felt strongly was our higher timeline. There was much to be happy about, yet the truth of undigested and trailing edge energies between us from this life and mostly from our soul bonds/binds in other lifetimes needed to be felt. The higher frequencies of New Lemuria here in Victoria supported the flushing up of these energies.

We eventually reconciled until another separation period was necessary in March of this year. This one lasted for a painful and intense six weeks in which we even felt into moving apart from each other permanently. We thankfully came back together from these separations with renewed desire and commitment to be in the union. We fell in love again with each other in an arising way and with parts of ourselves too as the inner sacred union through parts work became a very important lifeline.

Yet, also, we came together with more clarity about what we needed from each other going forward to best serve our personal growth and SoulFullHeart too. As Raphael has been sharing lately in his videos, the growth edge of moving into co-leadership is something that we are in ongoing process with together, especially as we heal and feel into other lifetimes and karmic dynamics in our leadership expressions (which most people never get into or become conscious of at all.)

I am feeling how the energies since the 11/11 portal and through the 12:12 gateway coming up is one of supporting completions to open UP new beginnings, especially as we move into the New Earth Energies of 2020.  Energies of completion CAN be challenging to be with as they can feel so much like everything just isn’t working anymore, falling apart, or crumbling. Which, if it has been anchored to something that is no longer serving you, they ARE collapsing in order to make room for the new. The completions can be big (such as with a relationship completion, career and geography shifts, etc.) yet, also, they can be more subtle as we also let go of habits, limiting beliefs, previous knee-jerk reactions, suffering patterns, and more. 

The codes available for 12:12 (also supported by a full moon) assist with revelations/clarities and then the letting go in order to prepare for NEW beginnings in a NEW year. It can be more difficult to let these codes in if there is a resistance inside from parts of you to surrendering to the death/rebirth process and blocks to trusting the overall outcome of it. Your Inner Protector may want to keep you in a safety and comfort zone, even if you are consciously unhappy or frustrated, rather than take a risk into the unknown. You can begin negotiation with your Inner Protector around this by meeting them through this guided meditation: https://youtu.be/2FzBzK5vgck

I feel that loss can be our greatest teacher. It wakes us up from our routines and our habits. It forces us to go within and reconcile with ourselves. The grief and mourning connect us with a deeper appreciation and gratitude for what we are letting of and completing.

This 12/12 gateway is also connected to Christ/Sacred Masculine and Magdalene/Sacred Feminine consciousness. Yeshua and Magdalene can provide an infusion of Divine Masculine and Divine Feminine energies now to support the going in deeper or the leaving or completing. They provide a template of sacred union that activates our inner feminine and masculine. This inner union helps to heal inner polarities and fear dynamics that can keep us stuck and not able to let go.

The 12/12 gateway offers another opportunity to move into our bigness in ALL forms of unions and especially those from within us….from one part of us to another!

Photo of the sun codes was taken by me yesterday on our hike with a guided meditation filmed with me coming soon!

Join Raphael and I on Saturday, December 14th at 10:00am PDT for our last group transmission together of 2019. This group is to connect to the 12/12 gateway, digest the decade and prepare for 2020! This group transmission is open to the public. You can attend the group and/or receive the recording for an energy exchange of $15 CAD (about $11 USD). You can purchase the zoom link here to join us live and to receive the recording through your email: https://www.soulfullheartwayoflife.com/product-page/9-sacred-union-codes-group-transmission-jelelle-and-raphael-a

Or you can purchase it here through paypal: paypal.me/jelelleawen

More info here: https://www.facebook.com/events/465469127414714/

Love,

Jelelle Awen

Jelelle Awen is Co-Creator/Teacher/Group Facilitator/Ambassador of SoulFullHeart Way Of Life, a healing process and paradigm offering New Gaia Ascension frequencies to transmute trauma into love on emotional/spiritual/physical levels. For more information about  1:1 individual sessions with her for women and with other SoulFullHeart Facilitators, virtual group transmissions, four day gatherings in Victoria, BC, writings/books, and videos, visit soulfullheartwayoflife.com.

Vulnerable Sharing From A Moment Of Deep Tears

by Kalayna Solais

Crying in the moment and I can’t 100% track it, what’s going on behind the tears… but, I thought I’d share and see what is coming through my heart in this moment. Take you along with me. 

IMG_3985

Sometimes there is just so much sadness that comes up in me. It’s not always linked to what I’ve gone through or am going through now. It’s not always connected to an inner process.

Sometimes it just IS. And there are so many layers to it… some of them mine, some of them not so much.

The deeper I feel it… the more I feel the sadness of a part of me coming up, but a sadness in my soul in a ‘Cries of the World’ kind of way, too.

My empath has been becoming even more sensitive than ever lately. The sense of needing the same masculinized protection inside has been healing for years. It’s time to have a more exposed, feeling, feminine heart that doesn’t need protection but needs to vulnerably share and deeply feel.

Beginning new things is always something sensitive for the younger, very feminine parts of me that care so much about being liked, being accepted, doing well… and also care SO much about others, about helping others heal, about having resonant relationships where there is genuine care, and about seeing this world we live in becoming more gentle, more open-hearted and caring, more compassionate, and ultimately much, much safer to live and breathe and emote and LOVE in.

There’s still a lingering sadness in my feminine that my last relationship is over. There’s still a way that it’s just HARD to see the growth that couldn’t happen while we were together. And there’s still so much confusion as to why this has been true. I can feel this aspect’s confusion though… her pain around relating to men in general that some of it stems from and how this relates to her relationship to my masculine inside.

When it comes to men, it’s just been SO hard to try and become what she isn’t in order to get loved, feel wanted, and belong to the man’s world. Often this has meant sacrificing something of herself for the sake of the relationship and keeping it kosher. And over the last couple of months of inner process between her and my masculine aspect(s) I’ve become more awakened to how this dynamic has lived inside of me. How he has caretaken something in her which has kept her small and how she has not been able to vulnerably invite him to actually feel her and meet her halfway in any area so that they can feel each other and really, genuinely BE together in collaboration, mutual respect for each other’s bigness, and LOVE.

So there’s that going on in this ‘now’ moment. And it doesn’t need solving or resolving… just more feeling. There’s definitely some other layer of this inner relationship coming up for me to tenderly feel with these aspects, more push-pull towards each other.

Some of the tears aren’t mine, so there’s that layer too. I don’t mind moving the ‘Cries of The World’ through my heart though. I actually feel honoured when I feel them and when I feel others and their genuine pain. This doesn’t plague me or bother me. The ‘Death Doula’ inside of me can be with the mourning and the sadness and even the frustrations. The frustrations through, because I don’t have many of my own anymore, especially in my masculine aspect, quickly move into the more vulnerable feelings of sadness that are beneath them.

Questions of “Why isn’t there more love flow in this world yet and heart warmth too?”; “Why are Disclosure people so intense still and not seeing how any focus on warfare exacerbates the problems instead of moves it all into new territory?”; “Why aren’t more souls choosing to REALLY go inward yet?”

As I feel my heart ask these questions, I know the answer already… “It’s not yet time… but it will be eventually. And the only thing YOU can do is keep going inward, keep feeling, keep sharing, and keep growing and healing, as you also respond to those who ARE ready”.

So, there it all is… different raw layers coming up on this early, EARLY Friday morning. 

I don’t often share this way because it seems to draw caretaking from others sometimes. I’m sharing this today to show how I process, the different layers I feel going on in so many moments of deep feeling, and I trust that what is meant to resonate and support your own process, will. 

Thank you so much for taking this in as you feel to for yourself. 

***

Kalayna Solais is a SoulFullHeart Facilitator for women, energy healer, soul scribe, and poetess.  Visit https://www.soulfullheartwayoflife.com for more information about space holding sessions, group calls, videos, community, etc. 

Getting Sirius About Unworthiness With Love & Compassion

It is genuinely feeling our worth that leads us beyond what we have currently set up for ourselves in our experience, both externally and internally.

It is easy for our unworth to accept the environment that we have settled for, as attempting to go beyond that means we would have to feel like we deserved it to harness the power to change it. So many excuses to living a truly magical life are ways in which our unworth is telling us that it is afraid to feel the depth of this wound.

The power to manifest lies in our worth. It is the what opens the door to turning our dreams into reality. Mundane into the Sacred. It what pulls us out of the dark and into the light. But the act of letting in our worth is found in feeling the part of us that holds our unworth.

To be able to just separate that out means you have enough worth to take another step. To feel another possibility. Making the next choice while your worth holds your unworth through the doorway and into the next layer of your power and self-love. Each time you hold this unworthiness through its cycles, it surrenders more and more and you get bigger and bigger.

The experiences can be very difficult. The unworthiness, expressed in so many different ways, can win out at times. It does have an immense power, but since it was ultimately created by us in the first place means we must have the power to be hold it and love it.

This core wound will arise in times when you find yourself on your way to accessing your greatest gifts and your deepest love. It is ironically a sacred road sign that was planted by you before you even realized it. So antithetical to a rational mind bent on avoiding pain. It is easy to find ourselves being in stasis in order to not go into it. But when you are ready, when your soul and guides and soul family are there to back you up when needed, it will come to you.

It says, “I trust you and I need you.” Your unworth is your sacred treasure to the magic you have always been.

*****

Gabriel Solais is an emoto-spiritual men’s and women’s facilitator, energy healer, writer, poet, and heartist with the SoulFullHeart Way of Life.  Visit https://www.soulfullheartwayoflife.com for more information about space holding sessions, group calls, videos, community, etc. 

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The Velveteen Rabbit Within Us All

Digesting a lot in the aftermath of completion. My heart and consciousness still calibrating to a new reality post-marriage. There are ghost-like sensations throughout the day, things that I would normally have responded to are no longer there. It is a bit of a emotive and cognitive dissonance yet that is the very thing that lands me back into me.

Me.

Who is that even? I am beginning to become aware of who I was and which parts of me were in response to all of the relationship dynamics. I do feel a core self that has been there but the degree to which “he” showed up is still in question. That is the current process. Taking stock of where “I” was and who this “I” even is.

It is not so much existential or judgmental as it is curious with compassion. That is what allows the shadow to come out and be seen and felt. Just hanging outside the cave entrance and letting it know that I am here to be a friend and a caring advocate. Not a punisher or a hunter looking for extradition.

When we go through emotional times like this it can be so easy for a part of us to go into “fix it” mode or into the blame/shame game. Instead there is an opportunity here for us to get to some tender and profound understandings of what make us who we ARE and who we want to be going forward. This makes all our experiences sacred and meaningful. We get to come in contact with aspects of ourselves that are deep need of love and forgiveness.

Through this experience I will find something that may not look “good” or feel good, but if my Higher Heart is leading the way I can guarantee I will find something that will be real and that is what any of us can hope to aspire to. Just ask the Velveteen Rabbit.

******