Readying Yourself For More LOVE ON ‘Love Day’

by Kalayna Colibri

It’s Valentine’s Day today, and that brings up a lot for so many… even as I celebrate the day with my beloved Gabriel, I feel how much I’ve had to move through even recently to really see him and let him in more, even while we explored being ‘just friends’ for a while and there was a necessary inner boundary to doing this. I feel how this has been equally a process inside of me, for my inner feminine and masculine aspects to really start seeing each other and letting each other in more. What a dance this is, and ongoingly too, in ways and on levels you wouldn’t necessarily expect! I look at Gabriel and feel so attracted and drawn to every chakra, every limb, every nuance of his being, and I feel how much this might bring up for others who haven’t experienced this yet and are readying themselves for it.

We don’t ever have to be perfect to let in the love we desire. We are invited to be present to the process of the deepening and the journey that unfolds even while in your most desirable relationship yet.

I’ve been on both sides of the coin on different Valentine’s Days – in the celebration and the pain. And both are worth feeling fully… both are alchemical and can lead you to more of what you need to feel so you can draw the romance you most deeply desire and the overall experience of love in your life too. I feel the ache you may be in, and I feel Love there with you in it, helping guide the way to a deeper experience of it in ways you may not even realize are possible.

It’s a good day to write to Love itself, asking it to be with you in your ache and also perhaps celebrating its existence. Love wants to hear you, be close to you, feel you. It understands that you have felt hurt by it yet wants to have a new relationship with you and parts of you. It wants to ascend with you into higher frequencies and meet you there where it already thrives too. How do parts of you relate to love in general, let alone romantic love?

I feel Love offering now: “You are loved and that love is not conditional or based on anything other than your very existence. You are Love itself finding its way back to itself and that journey in all its highs and lows is sacred and worth it. You get to explore it all, dance with all polarizations and expressions, or just BE with the waves of it and what is being illuminated. Either way, today brings you an invitation to a sacred dance within and with others. The ways you choose to relate to it rests with you and I am here, always, to be in all of this with you!”

The time to explore love is anytime you choose and the choice is always yours, today and every day. ❤️

From my heart to yours, Happy Love Day! ❤️❤️

***

Kalayna Colibri is a SoulFullHeart Facilitator for women age 25 and under, energy healer, soul scribe, and poetess.  Visit https://www.soulfullheartwayoflife.com for more information about space holding sessions, group calls, videos, community, etc. Visit our Patreon page to offer a money donation to support our offerings at https://www.patreon.com/soulfullheart.

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The Valentine’s Gateway To The Heart

In the past, prior to my healing journey, Valentine’s Day would give a part of me a little cringe. There was an energy of duty and obligation that swelled up inside whenever I was in a relationship. A feeling that this part of me had to “show up” in a way and be romantic even if he wasn’t totally feeling that.

Of course, there were the Valentines when I would go all out because I was in a new relationship and would get swept up in the collective swell of romanticism. When I wasn’t, another part of me would feel an angst and a bitterness that would demean the day as commercial exploitation. Many other times I could feel an ambivalence inside me as the day would just come and go

As I reflect on that and compare it to where I am now in a conscious sacred union with Kalayna, I can feel how those reactions were portals into my relationship to love, romance, and intimacy. Since it is a collective experience, at least in Western consciousness, a lot can get kicked up in the emotional body for both men and women.

Memories of recent relationships, the status of current relationships, or the longing of future romance amplifies as we experience this as a Whole. The parts of us that were wounded and hurt are triggered at this time. What a great opportunity to feel them in this!

I feel that this is true for both men and women, yet women feel closer to it than many men as we have more of a mechanism to bury or ignore these feelings than women. But I know that men feel a great deal during this time, regardless of what a part of them may say outwardly.

We all have parts of us that relate to this day differently. The inner child exuberance of joy, gifts, and candy, the inner teenager and its tragic romantic conflict and angst, the inner prince that gets to court and woo the inner princess, or the inner matriarch and patriarch that can throw the whole damn thing out the window for that matter!

What do love, romance, and intimacy represent to these different aspects of you? What are the hurt, trauma, yearning, or ambivalence wanting you to feel? To express? Writing a letter to Love is a great way to access this relationship regardless of where you are at. It is a key that can open up doors to the tender parts of you that are awaiting your entry and open heart to feel them in it.

For parts of men, this may feel a bit too feminine, but I encourage you to take a moment to give it a try. If there is a feeling of resistance then maybe writing to that resistance can help grease the wheels.

What does Love mean to you, even if what comes out seems to counter and oppose? Digesting that with another open heart can offer a deeper reflection and pathway to where you ultimately want to go in the arena of romance even if it is just from you to you, as that is where it all begins.

For more on inner and outer sacred union and intimacy check out these videos from Jelelle and Raphael Awen: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=nPVo1iZTYng&feature=share

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=diPaOZFiPBM&feature=share

*****

Gabriel Heartman is an emoto-spiritual men’s and women’s facilitator, energy healer, writer, poet, and heartist with the SoulFullHeart Way of Life.  Visit https://www.soulfullheartwayoflife.com for more information about space holding sessions, group calls, videos, community, etc.

Visit our website to offer a money donation to support our offerings at https://www.soulfullheartwayoflife/donations

The Poultice Of Love And The Fear Of Intimacy

Wow! What a response the last couple of days to our engagement. Thank you so much to everyone who left your well-wishes and congratulations.

One thing I took away from it all is that one way or another we all seek Love. Maybe there are parts that may feel despair, doubt, or indifference to it, but at our core we love Love. The only thing that gets similar reactions is anything based on Fear. So in some ways, we have parts that love Fear too. Yeah, I know, an oxymoron.

This is the sacred dance though. The two poles of our BEing that seem at odds but are just trying to reconcile each other. As we all continue to heal our Selves with Love and for the sake of Love, we enter a new relationship to Fear. Something shifts in the power structure. The deepening commitment and claim of this romance with Kalayna will certainly bring up another layer of this relationship to fear of intimacy. Deep transformational intimacy that takes us to the core of our deepest traumas and pains that can only surface from the poultice of Love.

So the collective response is saying to me, “YES! Keep going! Keep feeling the edges of this because I want this too!” or “YES! Bring more of this into the world as it adds to mine as well!”. Even if Kalayna and I don’t “make it” in the long run, we are committing ourselves to this deeper healing that has collective and personal consequences. “Success” is only determined if we feel everything we to feel and say everything we need to say while we are engaged in this marriage of Soul and Heart. We are bound by this in desire, not duty.

I feel to continue this exploration of marriage, intimacy, love, and fear through the heart of the Masculine. What is its relationship and desire to those very things? Right now it is about being centered in Heart while exploring the Soul in healing the parts of me still in shadow around intimacy with the Feminine. It is a sacred one that I accept with dedication and passion.

If you are a man or a woman with this rising desire in you, stay tuned for more. I am also available for sessions to support you along the journey of this sacred healing and letting in of Love. Thank you so much again for all the outpouring of support and love for us both. ❤

*****

Painting by Eduardo Rodriguez Calzado

Gabriel Heartman is an emoto-spiritual men’s and women’s facilitator, energy healer, writer, poet, and heartist with the SoulFullHeart Way of Life.  Visit https://www.soulfullheartwayoflife.com for more information about space holding sessions, group calls, videos, community, etc. Visit our website to offer a money donation to support our offerings at https://www.soulfullheartwayoflife/donations.

Inner Sacred Union Deepening, Outer Sacred Union ‘Engagement’!

by Kalayna Colibri

The Lunar New Year/New Moon energy yesterday brought in a personal wave of NEW for Gabriel and I… after nearly 7 years of knowing each other, several relationship iterations (some romantic, some not) and now a year and a half of being in a deep Sacred Union together, we’ve decided to ‘get engaged’ and celebrate our next steps into even deeper union!! ❤

Earlier this week I had found myself moving through a sacred process of shedding my old relationships on an even deeper level. An old relationship to men that on some level was keeping my parts from really seeing Gabriel for the man he truly is. I felt deep tears as parts of me and Metasoul aspects too let go of another layer of him holding a ‘father figure’ and energy for them and let in Divine Father as the desired ‘father figure’ energy on a deeper level. I felt Father holding my parts as I moved through deep churning inside around the wounded masculine and how my parts have been personally affected by this energy and also how it has lived inside of me in my own masculine aspect.

In a way, this was a process of really letting in what I have with Gabriel in a new way. Coming out of these tears, I felt held by Father but also by the energy of Gabriel’s HIgher Self and essence, even though he wasn’t even home to witness my tears in person. I felt the heat of his warm heart bath, the beacon of light that he IS after years of deep and ongoing inner process to suss out the wounded masculine within and BE in LOVE with it within himself as it transmutes.

I realized after the dust had settled in my purging heart and soul field that I really wanted to marry this man… to celebrate our union and to make a deeper commitment. There’s a way that we could see marriage as something strictly 3D, but it isn’t strictly 3D beyond the legal paperwork. It represents something to parts of us but also facilitates a movement in our souls that brings in more lifetimes/timelines for us to feel together and individually. It activates the deeper union that we ‘know’ together in ways we haven’t explored yet, even the tougher ones to feel that aren’t so romantic.

It’s with an excited and FULL heart that I announce this engagement in my own way today… it’s with so much LOVE that is flowing inside of my heart, soul, and body that I share a piece of my process around letting this in. The journey into and through this sort of relationship is worth the discomfort of feeling the places of ‘yuck’ that help you let it in more at the end of the day. It’s worth the risk of losing it just to claim it all over again, starting inside between parts of you that have yet to claim each other. And, it’s worth the journey of healing and learning, yearning and aching, shaking up the old inside to let in the NEW… ❤

My beloved, my “friend”…

In many lifetimes of long due USness

and overdue claiming

We meet each other in this bliss mess dance

of Sacred Union.

Beyond blessed I am

As the Queen I am BEcoming

because of YOU,

with YOU,

as I lean in

and our dreams connect

in this swirl and dance

of overflowing service.

I have never met a King like you before

I have never been the Queen I AM now

because of the water I take in

living in your precious heart-garden.

You are the King of my heart

The bastion of deeply committed healing

and I look forward to all of the MORES

that await our creation

in our brand new phase

as “husband” and “wife”.

I LOVE you! ❤

***

Kalayna Colibri is a SoulFullHeart Facilitator for women age 25 and under, energy healer, soul scribe, and poetess.  Visit https://www.soulfullheartwayoflife.com for more information about space holding sessions, group calls, videos, community, etc. Visit our Patreon page to offer a money donation to support our offerings at https://www.patreon.com/soulfullheart.

Bridging Polarity In Service Of Love

We exist in a polarized dimension. It is not our essence to be fragmented into this and that, yet here we are. It was Divine choice and will to do so. To be so. When we lost the remembrance of that, it was like a babe being lost in the woods coming out of a dream. We saw and felt separateness in our most primal state. So we constructed, suppressed, and experimented with power in order to shore up the fear of that existential and sacred wound.

Timelines and worlds have been created and destroyed in this grand game of hide-and-seek. Seems almost a cruel joke on some level, yet the pain and suffering were the risks inherent in this desire to truly know and experience Love. The Divine has never been complacent to that fact in my heartfelt opinion.

So then what is the purpose of this trauma? This seemingly tragic consequence of the human condition. For those that have faced it heart-on, there is an awareness of this power of Love that goes beyond words and takes you into a dimension of reverence, strength, and awe that was unknown in Its singular state.

We are all a part of that Grand Choice if you truly believe we are a part of this Grand Design. The two cannot be separate, paradoxically enough. So in this way, we have a huge part in this experiment of experience. We feel. We ache. We cry. We scream. We choose. We surrender.

We become aware of this polarity inside as aspects and parts and we build bridges between them. We become aware of their stories, their experiences, their beliefs. From the wounded child/teenager to the fallen kings and queens of our multidimensional timelines. You are this kaleidoscopic tapestry of being that is the seed and vessel of the Cosmos. You are the lightship of leadership that can take us into the New.

This comes with a great price to parts of us that are seeking safety and/or control. There is pain to feel and responsibility to assume, but that is what leads to the greatest and deepest gift that lives within each of us. The power to feel and spread Love as far as the Soul can see.

*****

Gabriel Heartman is an emoto-spiritual men’s and women’s facilitator, energy healer, writer, poet, and heartist with the SoulFullHeart Way of Life.  Visit https://www.soulfullheartwayoflife.com for more information about space holding sessions, group calls, videos, community, etc.

Visit our website to offer a money donation to support our offerings at https://www.soulfullheartwayoflife/donations.

Photo by Victorien Ameline on Unsplash

Gabriel: Rebirthing And Arising King Of Heart… Happy Birthday!

by Kalayna Colibri

I don’t think we will ever fully understand this unraveling mystery of us… our connection that somehow keeps opening out, even with moments of tension, fear, and remembering the poignancy of what we have together. We have walked out many crucibles individually and as a couple too, including years of moving through different forms and depths of connection in our relationship together.

I feel how far we’ve come… how far you’ve come as a leader, a King-man, a lover, and heartist, and how that keeps everything alive! You’re in a new phase of really wearing your crown and showing up as the WayShower through the shadowland that you ARE. I have never met anyone who loves their shadow more than you, beloved. You have been so courageous and willing to keep going in and not faltering in that quest. I deeply admire and love you. I feel my parts appreciating your light and your encouragement, overflowing from the ways in you love love and encourage your own parts to keep showing up and keep feeling. Your beacon is lighting up… your inner space is broadening to let in more of those you’re meant to serve through this being that you are and keep becoming more of every single day.

For you… ❤️

Built on impermanent sands this castle is

Phase after glorious phase

With frolicking roses and the tallest trees,

Fertile ground for fruitful bounty

Of where lovers hearts can go together.

Foraging love from each bush and channel

Each shadowed branch

From seeds unknown

Brings new mystery to this USness

We have only just discovered

Has more depth

Than we could have known

In previous lifetimes in THIS lifetime!

With expanding wings,

glistening crown,

And elaborate shell,

Your eagle King

And turtle monk

Serve love with you

In all moments

And each turn of your heart-light

Toward the new and renewed.

I am honoured

And in deep admiration

Of the man that is you…

Thank you…

For all you are

All you will be

And all you call for me to see in me too.

I love you! ❤️🔥

Happy Birthday!

Love,

Kalayna

***

Kalayna Colibri is a SoulFullHeart Facilitator for women age 25 and under, energy healer, soul scribe, and poetess.  Visit https://www.soulfullheartwayoflife.com for more information about space holding sessions, group calls, videos, community, etc. Visit our Patreon page to offer a money donation to support our offerings at https://www.patreon.com/soulfullheart.

The Pain Of Letting Go Into Love

By Raianna Shai

Letting go is one of the hardest processes we go to through in our lives. Whether it’s letting go of a career, a pattern/habit, a geography, or a relationship it can bring up so much for us to process. Letting go is so much harder than holding on.

Parts of us can judge us for our decision – feeling that you made a mistake, that you hurt or disappointed someone, that you did something wrong or will regret your decision. The best thing to do here is to feel compassion for this part. Give it love knowing that it just wants the best for you and it may be scared that it couldn’t protect you from this pain you may feel.

Letting go is painful but it also leads to a beautiful new beginning. Maybe you get that new job you always wanted or a geography that inspires your heart and soul. Maybe you get the chance at a new phase of an old relationship or a new one that reflects the love you have cultivated inside.

It can feel like you’re dying inside during this process. Like you’ll never feel happy or be yourself again. Or maybe you feel hurt and angry and find it hard to feel why it’s all happening, especially if it felt out of your control. Maybe you can’t feel anything or you can’t stop feeling everything.

And sometimes it comes in waves. A comment here or a reminder there can spark tears at the drop of a hat. Then you have a moment of clarity, a moment of knowing it will all be okay. Then you feel the guilt or the shame and it all comes crumbling back down. These are all parts of you that have reasons for feeling the way they do. Feel the pain, but let the clarity and love hold it all.

Whatever you feel there is always another side of it. A realization waiting to happen. A new love for yourself and life will start to creep in. A new view on what you have and what you want to have will fill your heart and inspire you.

All this can happen if you truly let go. Let go of expectations, let go of judging yourself or others, let go of what others might think of you. Mourn the loss, mourn what could have been and the goodness of what was and then let love fill the space. As hard as that may sound right now, it will come. Whether it takes days, months or years it will come and it will be beautiful.

Raianna Shai is a SoulFullHeart facilitant and social media maven for SoulFullHeart Way Of Life. Visit  www.soulfullheartwayoflife.com for more information about sessions, events, videos, community, etc. Return LOVE in money form: https://www.paypal.me/supportsoulfullheart or visit our Patreon page to become a monthly supporter: https://www.patreon.com/soulfullheart.

Lunar Eclipse Supports Feeling Shadow of Polarizations, Invites Unity

By Kalayna Colibri

Last night while witnessing the moon’s eclipse and feeling it hanging very close to my field, I was struck by a feeling of emerging sisterhood in my life and process, yet also the potential for it worldwide.

Yet… the temptation for many seems to still be that the way to unify is in anger. The way to find our common ground is to get pissed. To rage. To march. To condemn the masculine… in men yet also in each other. This is masculine versus masculine in the end, leaving the world inside and outside of us without any room for the sacred masculine AND feminine to unite and make love.

Pointing fingers, protesting, arguing without care of where and how it lands in each other is a phase of our relationship to each other that wants to move into something new. It’s a deep shadow expression of our fear of actually loving ourselves and each other. It’s a fear that the cycles of pain will continue while we continue to become a cog in the wheel, contributing to this cycle with that same fear. Real intimacy brings up a lot more than anger and push-away. It brings up tears and vulnerability, it brings up what’s underneath the rage and presses the heart to open in order to keep giving and receiving nourishment.

This picture of relationship I’m describing is not idealized or impossible… I get to live this every day, I get to be challenged by the presence of others who want to keep this flow going within themselves and with me, I get to feel and meet the challenge of continuing to move through my resistance to love and to keep letting it in… knowing full well that doing so means walking into fires of personal funeral pyres as the old way of approaching life and others passes away, and also knowing that it means getting to experience the heaven of a deeper and easier love flow than I’ve ever experienced before.

Even last night… sharing intimacy with my mate Gabriel, feeling his admiration of myself, my body, my heart and soul, I felt my admiration for his and let his male gaze into every pore. I felt so many tears come up and out like a fountain, feeling the pain of my soul and heart in relating to the masculine in ways that weren’t nourishing on either side and feeling afraid of it. Feeling the pain of a collective of women and what they’ve experienced and also the pain of the men who have not ever been initiated into how to make real love with a woman and what it feels like to be truly met or felt on their side either.

The more energy that’s spent in blame-game shaming and pushing away at each other, the less opportunities we create for the deep healing and nourishing intimacy that’s possible, that wants to bloom and blossom starting between parts of you that are polarized to each other but who want love more than anything else in this world. Starting to see and feel these dynamics within is the best and most profound way to shift what you draw in your outer relationships and what you start to see is really possible with each of them. ❤️

For support as you go into this territory and really feel how it all applies or could apply to you, my beloveds and I hold sacred session space for these explorations and more: soulfullheartwayoflife.com/sessions

***

Kalayna Colibri is a SoulFullHeart Facilitator for women age 25 and under, energy healer, soul scribe, and poetess.  Visit https://www.soulfullheartwayoflife.com for more information about space holding sessions, group calls, videos, community, etc. Visit our Patreon page to offer a money donation to support our offerings at https://www.patreon.com/soulfullheart.

Inner Masculine/Feminine Balance Guided Meditation – DAY 15: 33 DAYS DEEPEN W/JELELLE & RAPHAEL AWEN (VIDEO)

DAY FIFTEEN: DEEPEN 33 Day Video Series – Inner Feminine & Masculine Balance

Guided Meditation W/Jelelle & Raphael AwenThis is day fifteen of 33 in my daily video series called Deepen. Today, my beloved and SoulFullHeart Facilitator Raphael Awen joins me to talk about inner feminine and masculine balance. Raphael shares about a process that he is holding with his inner masculine and feminine parts/aspects to explore where there is more doing, linear, and power driven masculine rather than a balance of masculine energy with feminine heart presence. Jelelle shares about how this applies to the inner masculine for women (as represented by the Protector.)

Energy Update: Invitation To Connect With Divine Mother/Father Through Personal Sun Chakra

By Kalayna Colibri

Today I feel a mix of energies coming in via our Personal Sun chakras, an Ascension chakra located about a foot above our heads. When I feel and see this chakra, I feel warmth as if I am laying in the sun’s rays at the beach or in a park. I see it swirl with bright white-golden hues and other colours too. Today, it feels very bright and present, offering us downloads and activations but a way to BE with them too.

The masculine energies from Divine Father are grounding and warming today… they are offering illumination through this chakra and also a feeling of being held and protected, while also offering the wisdom of non-action unless necessary, of taking the time to be with each arising moment. This isn’t something I’ve been very good at personally, yet the desire even in my own masculine aspect named Kaius, is to be in each arising moment fully immersed and fully present in heart.

The feminine energies from Divine Mother are spacious and compassionate today… they are offering space to feel the courage and the fear that comes up too when truly seeing all possibilities for ourselves and our relationships, when truly committing to our next steps as they appear before us. She offers, as always, space to be, to feel, to let in love and let go of what isn’t love, and to begin to know the difference as experienced and expressed by our own hearts. I feel my feminine aspect, Kathleen, letting this in today. Her heart is still raw from experiencing a renewed connection with Kaius and the new possibilities for them both in relationship to each other. She is usually very oriented to my outer relationships, especially romantic ones, and she is learning to pull back inward and look to Kaius for what she would normally want from an outer romantic partner.

On that note of sharing about my inner masculine and feminine aspects, I feel how these frequencies from Divine Mother and Father today are also illuminating next steps for the inner sacred union, the one that is most important in our lives, the one that needs the most attention, compassion, and love as well as undying curiosity to keep feeling what’s happening within it. This is what shifts all outer relationships, which can feel scary but exciting, both. The possibilities for new alchemy too is strong once you feel how these two aspects are relating (or not relating) to one another.

Connecting with your own Personal Sun chakra today feels like the invitation… to feel what wants to download to you, what next steps you may need illuminated for your own inner healing process, and to just plain feel how loved you ARE, right here, right now. ❤️

Much love!

***

Kalayna Colibri is a SoulFullHeart Facilitator for women age 25 and under, energy healer, soul scribe, and poetess.  Visit https://www.soulfullheartwayoflife.com for more information about space holding sessions, group calls, videos, community, etc. Visit our Patreon page to offer a money donation to support our offerings at https://www.patreon.com/soulfullheart.