Choosing To Forget

By Raphael Awen

You’ve chosen to forget.

The desire, the rate and pace, the content of what and how you remember is also a choice.

A dynamic and powerful part of you has been assigned to hold this tension of what needs to remain in the forgotten category and what is safe and timely to be remembered. We could call this part of you, your Gatekeeper, the guardian of the necessary veil who enabled and afforded you to inhabit this desired third dimensional school without imploding.

It’s been a bit of a family joke for those that know me to have a little fun with my forgetfulness around movies. I’ve tended strongly to forget titles, story lines, and often only recall a movie I’m watching for the second time part way into the movie. It’s not all movies as some story lines made profound impacts and memories. Other movies, however, who people around me found interesting enough, I often even fell asleep to while watching.

I asked my Gatekeeper whose name is Rhodes about this, this morning and immediately my awareness expanded out that this forgetfulness of story has directly to do with the strength of the veil that I chose and needed this life. Even with Rhodes himself along with stories of my Metasoul aspects and their timelines, I’ve had trouble recalling some time following after having deep and profound processes of remembering. It would simply get swallowed back up into a sea of a kind of a sea of forgetfulness.

Rhodes communicated today that the strength of other timelines stories needed to have sufficient veil in order that the purpose of this timeline be protected. As I’m awakening, however, this movie amnesia, whether it’s about movies or about my soul history, or even this life history, is making other parts of me feel self conscious. They want to get on with remembering. Remembering, they feel is the answer to what is ached for, and the answer to where parts of me feel, I and they still experience suffering.

I’m told that forgetting is a kind of suffering, a burden to bear, if you will, that we all chose, collectively and individually as a service to the goals and desires of love. Forgetting is not static however. Forgetting is for the purpose of remembering. We hid our own Easter eggs and we wrapped our own Christmas presents. We forgot in order to remember.

I’m told that remembering is ’to be returned to being a member’, after surrendering to a kind of dismemberment from love. The forgetting had its own pains as does remembering, like blood returning to a limb that fell asleep.

I’m told that the whole purpose of forgetting and remembering was to expand love from its original perfect/imperfect state. Love itself wanted to be noticed and to be revered. It birthed duality as a place to get noticed, seen and appreciated.

Getting to know and feel this magical part of you who’s been your personal Gatekeeper is now your opportunity to negotiate the rate and pace and content of your awakening as you lovingly guide yourself and other parts of yourself through this epic journey.

Story lines from other timelines in your Metasoul await you to be felt and seen and transmuted into love. Karma itself also wants to be transmuted from the expectation of pain to the expectation of bounty and love.

Raphael Awen is co-creator, teacher, and facilitator of the SoulFullHeart Way Of Life.  Visit for more information about sessions, events, videos, etc. Visit our donations page to offer a monthly or one time money donation to support our offerings.

Veils Of Amnesia Lifting W/More Access To Other Timeline/Lifetimes Integration

By Jelelle Awen

The veils of remembering and reliving this life traumas and other lifetimes/timelines are REALLY lifting now. As we move into the Solstice frequencies, it feels like they are amplifying even more. The continual influxes and waves of love’s light allow for the dissolving of previously necessary barriers to your conscious connection to ALL fractals and fragments from your Metasoul (Higher Self Soul Source).

That veil of amnesia has been serving its purpose to allow you to FULLY immerse your consciousness into the 3D experiment. It just would not have been possible to do so if you could connect with all the dimensional expressions of your soul. The veil was always meant to lift significantly in one of your incarnations or we could say ‘Metasoul timelines/lifetimes’. It feels like THIS timeline/lifetime is one in which many souls have chosen to have their veils lift as the opportunity to do so presents itself with the vibrational ascension from 3D to 4D to 5D consciousness in ONE lifetime/timeline.

Lifting the veil can be a very intense experience depending on how your soul has chosen to experience it. For some, it comes in when you choose ‘past life’ regression therapy sessions or shamanic journeys or other methods that access these timelines for you. Access to the ‘memory’ of these other timelines can be traumatic though as you aren’t sure how to digest what you are seeing and feeling, You can ‘fuse’ to these timeline experiences (especially the very traumatic ones) as if it IS you. Also, you may access these timelines one time and then just ‘leave’ the portal open to this timeline. The vibration of trauma hasn’t been moved and the timeline is still flooding your BEing emotionally. I see this quite a lot in sessions, especially with those souls who have done a lot of ‘past life regressions’ and shamanic journeys.

While these methods of accessing the Metasoul can be helpful, I feel that what we offer in SoulFullHeart provides a bridge to a relationship WITH the aspects that are living in these timelines in a way that provides quantum healing of them and also emotional closure/healing. It is also ultimately a self-led process with YOU moving yourself into the consciousness states that allow you to connect with these Metasoul sisters or brothers whenever you want to, whenever your heart and soul feels called to. You form a deep and meaningful relationship with them over ‘time’ and this allows for a powerful, gift exchange between you.

Through the SFH process, you can shift the timelines that these Metasoul aspects live on, collapse those that are highly traumatic, and move them out of trauma and into a higher vibrational frequency. This creates a feeling of empowerment rather than overwhelm as you may struggle to digest the intensity of karma trauma held in some of these timelines otherwise. Also, everything you experience in these timelines is related to with LOVE, not fear or resistance or needing ‘protection’ from it.

Receiving support from your SoulFullHeart Facilitator, your 5D self, and your guides, you extend compassionate love and curiosity to embrace and unify ALL of your Metasoul aspects, even those existing in fear-based timelines such as Draco, Archon, lower 4D ‘hell’ realms, etc. As you extend love to these aspects, you ‘rescue’ them from their lower vibrational frequencies and move them into love, awakening one Metasoul aspect at a time to the reality of a unified Metasoul. More about the Metasoul here:

As your veil lifts, you also become aware of the part of you that has protected and held the veil in place. We call this aspect the ‘Gatekeeper’. This is not the same as the role of a Gatekeeper that some light workers fill. This Gatekeeper is a version of your 3D-based Protector part, yet they are more in fourth dimensional consciousness. They could also be called a ‘veil keeper’.

Usually, the Gatekeeper is VERY tired from holding the veil in place and from being conscious of ALL the traumas experienced by you in your life AND all the Metasoul timelines too. They often feel like a despairing, lonely warden who is trying to maintain a vigilant stance, yet just wants to experience love connection with the Divine again (which it disconnected from in order to ‘do its duty’. You can read more about the Gatekeeper here:

I feel that many Gatekeepers (in our def. of them) are being awakened now and are flooding the consciousness of the person that they have been guarding. It can be very confusing when this happens as the Gatekeeper energy can be INtense. From a fear-based perspective, they might be seen/experienced as demons or as negative entities ‘attacking’ you or as very unwanted frequencies of existential despair and acute separation anxiety.

If you can respond with much love and compassion to the Gatekeeper aspect of your Metasoul, then they can transmute from guard to guide. They can open up access to your Metasoul so that you can feel, remember, and heal timelines that are vibrating at a karma trauma frequency and connect with higher vibrational ones as well. I first connected with my Gatekeeper in 2008 and it has been a very rich and meaningful relationship for me that has lead to MANY of the awakenings that I have experienced to higher consciousness states. My Gatekeeper eventually ascended to a higher frequency and now I have fluid access to my Metasoul and other timeline/lifetime aspects. My Metasoul itself is the bridge and no guard is needed any longer.

There is more about the Gatekeeper and the process of working with them in this video that I did about them:

Lifting of our veils is a GIFT from our Higher Self and from the Divine. It is necessary to continue your Ascension. How you relate with that gift and the lifetimes/timelines that start flooding through from it is UP to you. You can relate to it with love and so it becomes love…..creating a powerful unification of your Soul as it returns into more wholeness frequency again as a reflection of the Divine Source from which it came!


Jelelle Awen is Co-creator/Facilitator/Teacher of the SoulFullHeart Way Of Life. She is a Soul Scribe and author of four books about Ascension, awakening, and emotional body healing. Jelelle offers a 90 minute one on one bridging session with her over zoom for $55 USD min. donation with women and with Raphael for men…more information here. Visit for more information about our NEW SoulFullHeart process programs, group calls, videos, etc. Visit our donations page to offer a monthly or one time money donation to support our offerings.

Lifting Veils Invite Feeling Parts/Metasoul Aspects

By Jelelle Awen

FEEL. Just feel. Let the textures of your heart come up to BE. Allow what needs your attention to claim your space and hold it with self love. In this feeling/allowing/holding space for yourself, you create NEW possibilities of healing and transformation.

The parts of you that need you…the little girl INside or the little boy INside, the HUGE warrior, the guard on duty, the controller/manager, the punisher/critic, the teenager…..ALL these aspects and their emotional reality are pinging and ponging from within you. It doesn’t really work to ignore this, although you can try and part of you may try VERY hard to suppress all this emotional activity from coming UP and out.

All these parts came and formed when feeling was not OK, when there was no space made inside for them and with them by those meant to care and guide, your caregivers and parents as they didn’t have this either. There was no space for feeling what you were feeling WHILE you were feeling it and so the energy gets stuck.

It is stuck in stories, scenes, and moments that your mind brings you back to often, trying to help your heart heal, yet unable to do it. Your mind brings you ‘back’, yet these moments live in the Now of the emotional body, continuing to play out and influence you. These moments need your heart presence in order to be ‘moved on’ from being 3D anchored.

In sessions lately, I have been hearing more from people who do not remember very much about their childhoods. Or they can’t remember after certain traumatic and painful events happen or before these events, especially those connected to sexual abuse experiences. This is not actually a matter of memory of the mind, but rather, the Inner Protector which has ‘shut down’ access to the memories because they would be too painful for you. The Protector becomes worried and concerned that you couldn’t ‘handle’ to remember and emotionally digest it.

This is the same thing with connecting to other timelines/lifetimes as well. The veil of amnesia is maintained and kept ‘down’ by the part of you that was tasked with doing this. We call this aspect the Gatekeeper and they need to feel that YOU are ready for remembering and connecting to the often very intense karma drama that these Metasoul aspects live in.

In the SoulFullHeart process, we support the authentic You – your 5D Self – to arise that CAN handle and wants to feel, to remember in order to heal, and to BE with the stuck places and parts that need you. You begin to remember it ALL (including other lifetimes with increasing clarity) AS you negotiate with the Inner Protector and Gatekeeper aspect. Negotiation with these parts allows for the pipeline of memory to open and trust grows that You can handle what comes as a result.

Your Protector may still ‘see’ you as a child and as you connect consciously with them, they start to lean into you and rest, feel you as more of an emotionally mature adult. As the Protector rests, this opens up your heart, body, soul, mind in often HUGE and new ways. More about parts/Metasoul aspects here:

FEEL. Just feel. It’ll be OK. It’ll be Beautiful even when it is necessarily painful.

So much support is coming from these bounding and bountiful energy waves right now to hold a space for the feeling of feelings.

So much support WITH love to go where love wants to go and couldn’t go in the moment, yet can in the NOW…..moving, transforming, and offering so much more possibility of love as you feel and, so, heal.


Jelelle Awen is Co-creator/Facilitator/Teacher of the SoulFullHeart Way Of Life. She is a Soul Scribe and author of four books about Ascension, awakening, and emotional body healing. Jelelle offers a 90 minute one on one bridging session with her over zoom for $55 USD min. donation with women and with Raphael for men, along with other SoulFullHeart Facilitators as well…more information here. Visit for more information about sessions, videos, etc. Visit our donations page to offer a monthly or one time money donation to support our offerings.