Tag: Love

Feeling Our Relationships And Our Ascension

Published on by Kasha RosaLeave a comment

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By Leena Colibri

 

Starting in recent weeks, every night has carried with it an intensity in my heart, energetic field and body. I feel as if I am surrounded. I dream very intense, very real-feeling dreams. I also feel energies moving up and down my body, both on the inside and outside. My sleep is often interrupted as these energies move through and there is a feeling of my bedroom being very full of beings, energetics, shapes, colours, and the imprints of the dreams I’ve been having that feel more like walking something out than anything intangible. I don’t always remember every detail, but I do keep the feeling of it all within me, and quite often, as I do right now, I feel “cleaned out” by morning somehow.

I remember having a dream last night that felt personal and global. I was moving through a romantic relationship that wasn’t deep but for part of me was “enough” simply because he gave me “just” enough attention and affection. I was in the process of leaving the bond because I had plans to move somewhere far away and we knew we wouldn’t be able to continue our relationship. At the last minute though, I wanted to change my mind about leaving, even though my gut and heart both said that I actually wasn’t deeply satisfied by this bond anyways and was actually ready to move on from it. It felt as if I was trying to deny my destiny. When I tried to tell him about changing my mind and wanting to stay with him, he had already detached from me and I was already fading from his life and awareness. Just before I woke up I had been trying desperately to get his attention again. This feels like a pattern I’ve lived out in a few relationships but also, it feels like this is what is happening or about to happen in relationships of all kinds. We are entering a time during our ascension as a species, where relationships of all kinds will be challenged. Letting go with full hearts and appreciation for what was is what’s being asked of us now even as we also learn to be with ourselves in the grief and pain of separation. We can never truly be separate and whatever is real between souls and hearts cannot disappear forever, but not everyone or everything will be able to come with us on our very personal, yet somehow deeply connected, journeys of healing Ascension.

Relationships are a major thing for us as humans. We are meant to be social and for many of us, our hearts consciously long for community and of course, deep romantic love. Each and every tie we have to a person or even a habit or animal or object is something to feel into now as we continue our process of purification and remembering who we really are as part of Infinite Love. There is no end point to the Ascension journey but there seem to be specific markers that guide our way. Feeling any restlessness or doubt in our relationships or maybe even body symptoms when we are around certain people are very strong indicators that we should consider reevaluating and feeling what it is we really want to experience inside relationship with others. Many of us will be challenged with having to move through layers of doubts around our own self-worth and even the beauty of our essence. Letting these doubts surface and making space to feel them is sacred as it aids us in our forward movements that bring us healing and help us move out of 3D consciousness.

There is an invitation that I feel with softness in my heart as I bring this to you. The shifting times we are living in do not promise an easy ride, though they do want us to feel where the letting go is most difficult for us. It often is not a simple process, as I’ve experienced myself. The more aligned we become in relationship to ourselves, however, the easier it is to see and feel what a truly sacred relationship is and we can begin to draw those who are our true soul family and soul mates. Nothing anchors our healing and ascension more than having loving, non-codependent support around us.

 

**

Leena Colibri is a SoulFullHeart facilitator, writer and poetess. Find out more about the SoulFullHeart Way of Life at www.soulfullheartwayoflife.com

My Deepest Heart’s Love Song

Published on by Kasha RosaLeave a comment

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By Leena Colibri

Two magics of a different kind

Meant to dance together though opposite,

Intended to weave together a tapestry

Of sweet intimate love and fiery passion.

 

The love mosaic we create together

And the dance steps we make up

Give us the juice we need to keep finding ourselves

And each other

Again, again and, possibly, again…

 

A two-step with endless possibilities

And an infinite ceiling

Of deep respect and admiration

Watches over us as we find those tensions

That keep it all alive.

 

In a ying-yang mess of body parts

We breathe onto each other’s skin

And into each others hearts,

Blowing on the embers of the hottest love

As it cascades through each of our chakras

In a timing we can’t plan.

 

Your mental prowess and creative expression

Impresses and presses upon my forest heart

Teeming with alchemical creation

And the consciousness we each bring towards the other

Only serves to prolong the ongoing ache

For more, more and, most likely, more….

 
For now the sediment of a unsettled filtering process

Careens towards the bottom of my life’s holdings

Waiting for the unfolding

Of what could be

The greatest, fiercest, most deeply claimed romance

This heart and body have ever seen.

 

**

Leena Colibri is a SoulFullHeart facilitator, writer and poetess. Find out more about the SoulFullHeart Way of Life at www.soulfullheartwayoflife.com

Surrendering to Love as a Daily Practice

Published on by Kasha RosaLeave a comment

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By Leena Colibri

 

What is love asking you to surrender to today?

Sometimes it can feel hard to digest that every relationship, work opportunity, or life-changing event is actually an invitation from love to feel ourselves from a new place inside. Sometimes life takes us by surprise and suddenly we’re in the middle of a catalytic course of changes we never could have guessed were coming.

I’m feeling today the ways in which I’m still working on this skill of surrendering to invitations into new places of growth and healing. They aren’t always easy to navigate, especially without help. I’m also feeling how in those moments when we lack surrender, we are given the best roadmaps into ourselves.

You and I…we are universes. We are constantly shifting, changing, adapting and growing. We are having to let even our most constant and age-old stars fade out and die away. We are learning how to adjust our own conditions to allow new life to spring forth and move us onward. Even universes have to surrender to the cycles of life and the winds of love…

If you are interested in having help and taking along a mirror of love for your own journey into deeper surrender to love itself, please visitwww.soulfullheartwayoflife.com/sessions

 

**

Leena Colibri is a facilitator of the SoulFullHeart Way Of Life. Please visit soulfullheartwayoflife.com for more information.

Matched by Love

Published on by Kasha Rosa1 Comment

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By Leena Colibri

“Wanna wrestle?” Love asks, “it’s no fun without you”.

“Don’t I already?”

“When you want to stop, when you would rather not, when you are tired, just tell me.”

“Does that mean you’ll go away?”

“Only the human who can ask this in earnest gets any sort of answer that could satisfy them. I do not satisfy on command, but seek to satiate myself and my needs first.”

“And with me that comes down to wrestling right now?”

“…if you would like.”

“But is that what you want, Love?”

“Perhaps. If it is what part of you wants.”

“…I like you, Love. I feel my parts are feeling some liking of you too.”

“ 🙂 ”

“…can we go slow?”

“…of course, Loved one. Though I can’t guarantee that I won’t still win!!”

“You’re on!” “…Love…I think I want you to win.”

“Good. I was right about you then. But I still want to be matched. I still want us to challenge each other. I still want to work to find my openings in you, just as you seek to find more of me. We will get there, Loved one. If we can just keep going. I know I want to keep going more rounds with you.”

“Me too, Love. Me too.”
**

Leena Colibri is an apprentice facilitator of the SoulFullHeart Way Of Life. Please visit soulfullheartwayoflife.com for more information.

Throw-Away Love

Published on by Kasha RosaLeave a comment

heart-in-trash

 

By Leena Colibri

 

In a world made for the throw-away
life
love
plastic anything
romance
friendship
god

 

…self

 

How can real love show its colours
of brilliant black, blue, red and gold?
The bruises and dents on the quest’s trail
and the blood bled from the freshly opened heart
can barely shine through the muddle
the muttering
the utter grossness of our need for something more to pitch.

 

The pliable heart with plastic implants placed by dense fingers with no dexterity just reaction
nearly made impossible to open.
Nearly patented to be perfectly beyond reach
and beyond the touch of real, sacred human love.

 

There’s a way to see it
there’s a way to be with it
there’s a way to look and love beyond it
there’s a way to penetrate the din within that all-too-sacred noise and static
created by a static life
with static means
running out of ground too quickly
…or not quickly enough.

 

Love, breathe the hot air of passion down my neck.
Let it run out onto my swollen chest
barely holding my bare, aching heart.
Whisper that it’s over those times of war within
and that you are here to stay
so long as I claim you, want you, breathe you, need you.

 

So long as I can stand to keep letting you in.

 

So long as you can stand my insatiability.

 

May the world cry rumble below
into the caverns of the depths of soul and heart
showing the cracks on the walls of the ache and the pain and the need for more, more, more…

 

love
synthesis not synthetic
surreal but real

 

To heal, to feel…to ask for the real, live, moving, passionate, messy, sacred, ultimate piece
driving onward, inward, upward and out
bringing us to that longed-for place of release
realizing we could have seen it, held it, had it all along
if we had just asked.

 

** 
Leena Colibri is an apprentice facilitator of the SoulFullHeart Way Of Life. Please visit soulfullheartwayoflife.com for more information.

The Rearview Mirror

Published on by Kasha RosaLeave a comment
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By Leena Colibri

 

So this is how it goes…
You let go
and you trust
and you realize what you let go of
and what you are letting go into.

 

Never have I had such a trampoline inside
where I can leap and know no bounds
where the sky inside is the limitless one
and the gravity of the fall is into nothing at all.

 

You were a mirror of a different colour
a different density
and I expected you to work differently
…and not mostly in hindsight.
But here I go into a retrospective reflective surface
where I realize
not only could you not see me
but holy shit…
I didn’t see myself.

 

In a big way
I couldn’t, didn’t, wasn’t planning to.
Not while I had your eyes
your promise
your mouth, hands, lips, body, touch
and heart.

 

I poured water on my feathers
but the Pheonix fire didn’t cease
and my maniac heart
bent on healing
kept on beating it’s drumbeat tone with steady, thumping steps.

 

The thrumming goes on
even as you and I don’t
and you and I don’t
and you and I don’t either.

 

Love. I am your channel.
I am your healer.
I am your student.
Make and give me more me
so I may be
more of the me I couldn’t see
until I realized I am what I was missing all along.

 

** 

Leena Colibri is an apprentice facilitator of the SoulFullHeart Way Of Life. Please visit soulfullheartwayoflife.com for more information.

From the Realm of the Watchers

Published on by Kasha RosaLeave a comment

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By Leena Colibri

 

It’s okay if you don’t remember.
We aren’t going to leave you.

 

It’s okay if you don’t know.
There’s not much to know,
just to experience over and over again
until experience turns into the page love is written on,
not the words of love themselves.

 

It’s okay if you don’t know who you are.
We don’t care how many carousels you ride,
how many spins you take,
you will still have your essence in the end.
In the end, the only path that matters,
is the path you chose in every moment.
And no… we don’t care how you were or weren’t,
just how your experiments end.
The inconclusive conclusions you come to
along your way back to
love.

 

Love.

 

The only Ground Zero.
The only ground from where you rose,
and the only ground on which you fall.
The place where seeds are scattered,
and growth happens no matter what.

 

Yes. All else is an illusion.
But…
It’s the illusion you need.

 

That holographic something isn’t nothing.
It’s the most important thing
right now
right now
and
right now.

 

So… walk, run, fly, dream, make love, make war, make peace, get messy, clean up, climb up, and fall down.
Your sacredness won’t break, for it is not porcelain.
Your birthright to live into all realities remains intact.

 

Here we sit.
Here we watch.
Here we wait for you to remember
that the path is love,
the game is love,
and the light, dark, hard, easy stories
are the love you are learning
and remembering that you are.

 
 
**
Leena Colibri is an apprentice facilitator of the SoulFullHeart Way Of Life. Please visit soulfullheartwayoflife.com for more information.

Though Love Feels Hard

Published on by Kasha RosaLeave a comment

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By Leena Colibri
 

There needs to be the perfect flavor
The perfect texture
The perfect moment
For this love to be let in.

 

Love, though, doesn’t deal in perfection
Love is the only ad infinitum
Love is the only eternal
Love responds to our fenceposts
And still somehow sneaks itself under them.
The only magic carpet ride I want to be on…

 

“In theory”, she adds.

 

It’s the knowing
And feeling
That crumbling into Love’s outstretched arms
Means being caught Once and for all.
It’s a trust that isn’t easy
But maybe it can be…

 

“If I can let go enough”, she tells me.

 

There’s a line here, you know.
A spine.
A border framed by eloquence,
And attempted grace.
Meanwhile, Love cares only for the trying
For the willingness to wrestle
Knowing that if I can at least do that
That Love will, ultimately, win
As Love was always supposed to do.
 
 

**

 Leena Colibri is an apprentice facilitator of the SoulFullHeart Way Of Life. Please visit soulfullheartwayoflife.com for more information.

Seek And Ye Shall Find You

Published on by Raphael AwenLeave a comment

By Raphael Awen

cliff-jump

I know you’re out looking for something.

You wouldn’t be here if you weren’t. The same is true for me.

I have an answer for you today. And that answer is that I am not your answer. Your answer is YOU. If I am anything to you, I can only serve as a reflection to you of you. If you are anything to me, you can only serve as a reflection of me to me.

The something you are out seeking today is you. The something I am out seeking today is me.

I happen to know that you are seeking the fulfillment of your being in all of its aspects. You want to learn, to grow, to find meaning, to have purpose and passion in your life, and to share all of it in meaningful connection with yourself, with others and with the divine.

Why be here and why ‘do’ here if not for these things?

All of life is arrayed to help you find these things. You already have them, but admittedly, they aren’t your experience as much as you’d like them to be. Hence, you dare to desire, you dare to be out seeking. You dare to look to an other even.

But I can do absolutely nothing for you unless you are out to help yourself. In fact, if you make me your source, while refusing to be your own source, the result can only be abuse of each other.

You are the light of the world. You, as you are now, with your desires for growth and change, with your pains and wounds that you don’t let anyone see.

Love wants in to your defended and seeking heart. Love wants to bring you new reflectors of your essence. Love wants to invite you out to risk again.

Take this light that you are shine it into the world of your desire, your aches and your longings. Let love meet you, embrace you, hold you, reassure you.

Will you?

I know you’re out looking for something…

Seek and ye shall find.

Let nothing stop you. Be radical! Your life depends on it.

Raphael Awen is co-creator and facilitator of the SoulFullHeart Way Of Life. Visit soulfullheartwayoflife.com for more information.

Exploring Femininity In Relationship: Responding versus Charging Ahead

Published on by Jelelle AwenLeave a comment

By Jillian

Desire can be an ember. It can be slow burning. It can be tentative and hesitant; cautious and unsure. Desire can be provisional and exploratory; unsettled and indefinite. Desire can be open to consideration; speculative about how it will be ultimately fulfilled. Yet, always hungry and eager to be fed.

My desire has been ravenous at times; eating up greedily, swallowing up, galloping ahead, making hasty choices and rushing in, eager to finally feel satisfied. This hustling, mad dash to the finish line, has led to rushed decisions at times and hurried commitment to situations that were more frustrating than fulfilling.

This rush to gratify my own desires impacted my marriage by creating a dynamic between me and my husband Wayne where I was leading, charging ahead, and he often felt that his desires, concerns, and leadership didn’t have much room to be expressed. It was if the fire of my desire and my vision would consume us both. While I loved feeling that passionate surge inside of me, what I came to realize was that what I really desired was to collaboratively create, and lead with Wayne as an expression of our intimacy and closeness with each other.

I’ve experienced that intimacy invites us to heal by offering a ground of deepening familiarity and closeness with another person that also provides us with a powerful mirror in which to see ourselves. As the saying goes…Into-me-I-see through intimacy. Through my relationship with Wayne, I was able to see that the way I related to my own desire was more masculine in nature than feminine. I feel that the invitation to a woman in intimacy with a man is to respond to male leadership with her own desires and leadership. Responding this way allows a woman to rest in her heart, in her trust, and in her yin power.

Female Yin power, to me, is not so much about creating results and taking action (although of course we do!), as it is about feeling the emotional truth of a situation, leading with our heart, supporting our mate, and trusting that where he is leading is where we need to go next. This does not mean we are blindly following along or being subservient to our mate.

I had been a single woman and mother for many years before my marriage and was used to following my own desires to the exclusion of any one else. I was my own mate in this way, married to myself, and got used to not having to collaborate with anyone around major life decisions or choices related to following my passions. Yet, I also ached for that mirror of Intimacy to offer me a deeper look at myself; and I desired for a mate that I could collaborate with, be inspired by, and co-lead with.

Three years into my marriage, I am now in a phase where I feel that what I most deeply desire is to feel that my desire can heat up, it can be a seed or a flicker. And, most of all, that it can be fanned by, inspired by, and ultimately gets fulfilled by the beautiful union of my husband’s desires with mine.