Tag: going within

Journeying Into The Reality Of A ‘New’ Part Of Us

Published on by Kasha RosaLeave a comment

by Kalayna Colibri

 

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A sleepy day of process and generally being with myself… the discovery of a ‘new’ part to be with and heal led my day from this morning onward. Entering into the world of parts of us, especially parts we’re just starting to get to know, is a journey of traveling into a whole other dimension inside ourselves! Bringing your pen, journal and heart with you, you venture into your imagination and into the feeling tones of this part’s reality. Their reality can reflect long held memories in our bodies, hearts and souls. It is a place that has no age or time and they have lived there for who knows how long… sometimes they can even tell you! Sometimes there’s a sleepiness in the body and mind that comes into your being, as this journey, especially when just starting to feel a ‘new’ part, can be one of going into long-buried emotional territory and the heaviness is often palpable, somewhat hard to let in and digest.

This process began with an illuminating reflection, a mirror ‘held at an awkward angle’ as we say in SoulFullHeart, yet with love leading the way. This illumination is typically uncomfortable, yet the truth of it was undeniable inside of me… immediate *pings* of connection with this part began to emerge. From there, going in with a curious eye and heart was the invitation as I wandered forward into this now unveiled inner territory.

What amazes me almost every time I go in with a part, no matter how heavy or difficult they might fancy themselves to be, is the amount of relief that comes in just from feeling them, even in these first journal entries. They can heal quite quickly from this effort or sometimes they hold onto their pain for a bit longer. I have a journey with this part that’s unknown for now in some ways, though I can already feel where this may be going.

I wanted to invite you to gaze inside this window of starting a process with a part of you, to see if you can imagine yourself doing this too… there are so many of you who are courageously starting to do this through sessions with us in SoulFullHeart and THAT is incredible! It’s a process that has no limits to the depths that are possible, and all effort, sleepiness, openings and journalings are so, so worth it…

 

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Kalayna Colibri is a SoulFullHeart facilitator for women around (and under) the age of 30, energy healer, indigo-crystal bridge, writer, and poetess. Visit soulfullheartwayoflife.com for more information about space holding sessions, group calls, videos, community, etc. Visit our patreon page to offer a money donation to support our offerings at https://www.patreon.com/soulfullheart.

The Humility Of Really Feeling Our Emotions: Indigo, Crystal And Rainbow Souls Blog Series

Published on by Kasha Rosa1 Comment

by Kalayna Colibri

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There’s a certain amount of sanctity and sanity we preserve by NOT feeling, at least until the layers on top of our true feelings begin to give way and dissolve because of pressing life circumstances and swelling emotional reactions – THEN it can become insane-feeling, as chaos is created outside of us, pushing these feelings up even more as they call out for our attention. This is true for ANY soul ANYwhere. The piece here for Indigos, Crystals and Rainbows is much the same as for any awakening soul and heart – NOT feeling how we really feel becomes the much crazier choice than actually letting ourselves in. Yet too, there is something here that may be time-bomb-baked inside of us when we are in these soul groups, alerting us to this need for changes INSIDE of us at a much younger age because we are here to do so much work as leaders and healers.

I don’t hold any elitist sort of feeling around claiming I’m an Indigo. I actually feel it kind of lightly. For me it feels like a bridge and also a helpful explanation as to why I care so much about my growth and living into my soul purpose when I’m only just turning 30 this year. I became a “seeker” at age 14, which led me to a desire to serve others and feel my capacity to do so. However, this came in with some shadow pieces like arrogance and self-righteousness too and even in my already-cultivated self-awareness, I still wasn’t quite touching these and others, like entitlement, and narcissism, to name a few. This has been a part of the soul package I came wrapped in and some big things to work this life. I signed up for SoulFullHeart at age 24 because I wanted to work these things… taking breaks between then and now so that I could humbly go into life without consciously holding a process from time to time, which only illuminated more for me in the end. Once you sign up for the bullet train of deep healing, there really is no going back, try as parts of you might… 🙂

It took many reflections, some very hard to take in, for me to truly feel humbled, or rather, for parts of me to truly feel humbled and really start to feel what was really going on for them. There are soul wounds and also this-life, human wounds to feel too. These words of “arrogant”, “entitled” and “narcissistic” did NOT go in easily and there has been a lot of pain in even having to see myself in this light. What has been harder is feeling how  TRUE these words have been for parts of me who haven’t been challenged on their ways of being in life before! Until meeting Raphael and Jelelle Awen, I hadn’t had a single relationship with another teacher, healer, parent or friend who could bring these pieces to me and if they did, it wasn’t with love and compassion, but judgement from the parts of them who are the same way. I can’t explain to you the difference between these two experiences. It’s really something to feel for yourself. ❤

Feeling our shadow and what’s underneath it is an important aspect of the process of going within. What has appeared to be “in shadow” inside of us is actually a whole lot of pain that wants to surface and be healed. There are immense gifts on the other side of all tears shed when feeling our shame, hurt and even rage. As our layers of inner and outer protection melt away because we are finally safe enough to really feel ourselves and our parts, we feel these movements and realizations come to us with fluidity on waves of love that come from outside and inside of us too. It is a humbling process, to unravel deeper and deeper knots and layers protecting the precious yet strong vulnerability of the Sacred Human seed inside… the seed that is meant to grow, flourish and serve love to so many others!

Parts of me have needed to be how they’ve been – there is so much to push away from in our cultures and birth family conditioning and understandably, there is also a lot to protect ourselves from…until there isn’t, that is. Being emotional is still not a fully-embraced thing inside of many, though arguably it’s becoming more and more so as more of us awaken and can no longer deny how we really feel about anything or anyone, dark or light, or while in chaos or stillness or somewhere in between. During this ascension process, this is all being pushed up as light codes and astral influences constantly invite us to really SEE and FEEL ourselves in a much deeper way, illuminating the places where we still need healing and more authentic love flow. If you sign-for some help with this from SoulFullHeart, everywhere you need to go with become illuminated and we get how hard this can be to feel through. It is a deep healing practice and while there is so much joy, there is also much sobriety as the transformation it offers you really does start within and flow outward to every other area of your life.

Indigos, Crystals, Rainbows and the like are at an advantage age-wise and also soul-wise. We signed up to wake up early and to draw to us the paths that would help with that. Becoming more and more humbled to where our paths are taking us and that we DON’T truly know ourselves in earnest until we’ve really felt our shadows be challenged by someone holding up a mirror with LOVE behind it, is so important if not critical if we are really here to help awaken and lead others. We must first awaken to OURSELVES, let alone ascension, let alone Gaia, star beings, or anything spiritual. The heart truly is where the journey deeply begins and where all legs of it ultimately return to. And there is no other path quite like the one that really embraces and supports an ongoing exploration of our inner worlds, without an “end” place where you can declare ourselves fully-healed, and with plenty of juice for the journey inward and upward. ❤

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Kalayna Colibri is a SoulFullHeart facilitator for women around (and under) the age of 30, energy healer, indigo-crystal bridge, writer, and poetess. Visit soulfullheartwayoflife.com for more information about space holding sessions, group calls, videos, community, etc. Visit our patreon page to offer a money donation to support our offerings at https://www.patreon.com/soulfullheart.

Going Within To Discover MORE Aspects Of Self, Star Beings, AND Love

Published on by Jelelle Awen4 Comments
By Jelelle Awen
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You are drifting, shifting timelines INside to discover and experience new worlds IN there…..your inner galaxy is expanding as you deepen your exploration INside. Portals of multidimensional travel INvite you to experience the true vastness of your BEing from your roots to your wings.
 
The universe opens up INside as you find more and more access to fascination and wonder about what you’ll discover next, what you’ll remember about your soul next, what you’ll have access to next as your heart opens WIDER and WIDER with defenses and old conditionings falling away.
 
Your INquiry fueled by soul awakenings and heart openings INvestigates the next curve and turn of your INNER landscapes. Your inner flashlight beacon of higher cosmic heart turns ON and you SEE MORE, FEEL MORE, and ARE MORE. The inner darkness is not scary anymore, the shadows move into light. What has seemed evil becomes good, what has been in contention becomes in acceptance, what has been uncomfortable becomes familiar.
 
You experience true self to self intimacy, loving and accepting and connecting with ALL aspects of yourself…..from the inner child to the Star BEing, from the inner critic to the inner angelic BEing, from the inner protector to the inner Arcturian or Pleiadian or Sirian or ALL of these Star BEings and MORE. These aspects then can MERGE more and more into YOU and BECOME you, leading to more and more inner embodiment of the Infinite Love that you ARE. Leading to more and more sense of union WITH others and AS others too.
 
Love wants to open up the universes of unexplored territories and aspects that exist inside of you….Your inner space program to Infinite Love wants to LAUNCH! Every time you go within, you’ll discover MORE. ❤
 
Jelelle Awen is an emoto-spiritual teacher, sacred feminine facilitator, soul scribe, wayshower, multidimensional bridge, lover of love and co-creator and teacher of SoulFullHeart Way Of Life. She is author of  Keep Waking Up! Awakening Journeys To Avalon And Beyond and an upcoming book, Sacred Human, Arising Wonder. Visit soulfullheartwayoflife.com for more information about space holding sessions with her, group calls, videos, community, etc.

An Inner Fireplace, Going Within, BEing with Self

Published on by Jelelle AwenLeave a comment

By Jelelle Awen

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A day spent yesterday of being with me, relaxing, feeling mellow, being more inward than outward, moving some lower frequency/subtle toxicities through…not my usual JOY and high energy frequencies yet these are good days too actually! A ‘recharge’ of the love batteries from going inside which leads to offering more in overflow to others, especially for our group call today and right NOW in this moment of shared creativity.

There are times where self space holding is not specific or something big to process, yet just a sense and commitment and desire of BEing with self. A true desire to BE with self, not an ‘obligation’ or ‘should’, but because there is NO ONE you would rather be with than yourself. Making space for self and not ‘giving out’ too much. Feels like an incubator space created for one that we can return to over and over again!

I was an only child growing up and also a ‘latch key’ kid and my birth parents didn’t get home often until late. So, I had glorious hours to myself after school and these were my moments to BE with self, to play pretend, to dance, to sing, etc. Sometimes I played with friends or hung out with others, but mostly I cherished this time to myself as it was for and with ME and it helped me digest the intensities of the day and from the dynamics of my birth family. In this way, I believe I chose to be an only child in order to build up this container of sense of gloriousness about self time. I rarely have experienced being lonely this life because of the sense of a rich inner world that has bubbled over into my life.

In 3D, everything is outside. There isn’t an internal incubator because everything vibrates from outside of self. There is no ‘there there’ inside and the inside is like an empty chamber yet with ping pong emotional reactions clashing around (largely unconscious) and soul karmic frequencies simmering and bubbling (again, largely unconscious). There isn’t a strong self love and awareness fireplace to hold the fires that come up and so ALL of what comes up in self gets burned in the process. There is smoldering fires and ash everywhere inside of the 3D self.

The outward focus then is seeking for things to entertain constantly, to divert constantly, to control constantly, to numb constantly in the 3D self as conditioned by a 3D world. It is a constant search by the 3D self for the NEXT activity, thing, person…that will maybe even provide ALL of these aspects of entertainment, control, diversion, and numbness. So much of 3D cultural expression is based on this unground NEED and, really, obsession with outside distraction.

A big aspect of 4D awakening is the awakening to SELF and the glorious pleasure of creating and experiencing a growing self fireplace and incubator. And less and less NEED for outside distraction, numbing, and diversion. You are more just content with what is inside and going inside through meditation becomes the entertainment ground with vast rich terrains opening up inside of you. Not used for distraction though but actually in order to feel, in order to heal, in order to grow, in order to INtegrate the soul.

The 4D self has ups and downs, deaths and rebirths, discoveries and integrations, yet it is held in a CONSCIOUS and AWARE context of growth and awakening. THIS is a big difference from the 3D unconscious letting life just happen and being reactive consciousness that draws drama after drama to be victim to. The 4D self more and more feels how everything that you experience OUTSIDE of you is a reflection from INSIDE of you.

In this growing lived-in truth is empowerment, is the completion of feeling like a victim and life is happening to YOU. This is the growing sense of trust and surrender to your connection with All That Is and Divine Source. This is the transition into the frequencies of unity-yet-individual consciousness that is 5D and beyond where the self is revealed through the peeling and burning away with self love ALL the layers of persona, self image, and 3D conditioning to REVEAL and REMEMBER the soul that is a fractal from Divine Source in human expression as Infinite Love….

Jelelle Awen is an emoto-spiritual teacher, soul scribe, wayshower, multidimensional bridge, lover of love and co-creator and facilitator of SoulFullHeart Way Of Life. She is author of Keep Waking Up! Awakening Journeys To Avalon And Beyond and an upcoming book, Becoming The NEW 5D Sacred Human. Visit soulfullheartwayoflife.com for more information about space holding sessions with her, group calls, videos, community, etc.

Shifting Your External Circumstances By Shifting Your Internal Experience

Published on by Jelelle AwenLeave a comment

By Jelelle Awen

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Image by Bragitta Hodgson

Being YOU no matter the context, situation, or environment is a profound invitation for growth and awakening. Being the version of you that is spacious and sees the bigger picture, feels the deeper connection to life and Divine Source. And then, slipping and dipping, going down, being triggered, being ‘fused’, feeling emotions. And then, back up again to yourself when you can find yourself again and the situation is ‘right’ and the day is set up for it and the circumstances support it…

The circumstances offered by relationships, jobs and careers, geography, money, etc. impact you in these ways of lowered frequency, of not feeling like your higher self, when you need that reflection still, when you need something to rub up against, when you need the grist that it provides. These circumstances are sacred (as pain is sacred), yet, too, there is an invitation to consciously feel what the circumstances are reflecting to you and IF this is still YOU or not. The invitation is to feel if you want to BE what the circumstances are reflecting about you or not.

This is where the Universe invites you to go within, to FEEL and LOVE and KNOW yourself. Your ‘outer circumstances’ ONLY change when your inner reality does. There is NO other way. In 3D reality, it has been presented and we’ve been conditioned the opposite to this: WHEN my circumstances change, I will be happy. WHEN the externals of my life get better, I will feel joy. WHEN the situation outside of me improves, I will feel whole. However, the deeper truth that our soul knows is that only WHEN your internal experience changes and shifts does the external reality shift to reflect it.

This is where your POWER is. This is where your responsibility lives. INside. In self intimacy. In-to-me-I-see that is intimacy. And in this seeing of self you can see what and who you REALLY are versus what you have been conditioned to feel that you are. You can lift the veil of amnesia you chose as a soul and start to remember and see who you REALLY are and your multidimensionality and how much power you have. If your external circumstances are making you consciously unhappy and you are suffering over them, then this who you ARE in this phase of your journey. Is this being of YOU as you are seeing ok with you or do you want to BE something different? If you are consciously unhappy and looking for answers to not be anymore, then you are most likely wanting to see and feel something else.

As you awake and heal your heart, your soul, your body, your mind then you raise your vibrational frequency. The wounded frequencies create a magnet inside of you, drawing more wounded experiences and circumstances which perpetuates the cycle of suffering. You need this cycle until you don’t need it anymore. Until you have experienced enough love inside to let it go and your frequencies are healing and higher so that you are drawing more higher love frequencies from the outside to reflect your inside.

In SoulFullHeart spaceholding through sessions, we serve you to go within, we template for you how it feels when the internal reality of self love and higher self is more and more embodied and expressing and so drawing more and more external circumstances that reflect this goodness back to you. We support you to make CHANGES in your life to reflect this growing sense of self love at a pace led by you. It is all generated by you and your growing intimacy with SELF in the form of re-union with your inner family, your soul family, your angelic family, your star being family….and your selves that are represented in all these frequencies.

This is a transition, this being and claiming of true self expression and then having your external reality reflect this. I feel it is ALWAYS a transition in some form or another as we are ALWAYS growing in some form or another. Yet, too, there is a tipping point in this ascension journey where you no longer draw nor desire an outer reality of suffering, unhappiness, or frustration. You still make room and hold space for pain that comes up from inside of you yet you are no longer ‘flooding the decks’ of your ship with unhappy waters triggered by current circumstances. This IS possible as you go within, seek support, DO and BE something different in how you relate to self. This IS possible as you experience more love, reach a saturation point, and feel more and more that you ARE love and deserve love.

Jelelle Awen
Soulfullheartwayoflife.com

Note: Stunning image of a healing heart and soul is by amazing artist Bragitta Hodgson

Ascension Flu Offers Opportunity To Go Within

Published on by Jelelle AwenLeave a comment

By Jelelle Awen

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Ascension flu has been making its way through our home. Not surprising considering how much upgrading, shifting, and transformation is going on for both Raphael and I. Every day in the last month is seeming to bring new clarities, altered states, awakenings, intense connections with Ethereal beings….big shifts both personally and in our relationship.This is what it feels like the increasing electromagnetic energy fluctuations of 2017 are offering ALL of us.

On one level, it‘s the typical flu with runny nose, congestion, cough, fever, overall tired feeling. Yet, felt from the perspective of ascension, you can get a sense of the sloughing off that is going on….letting go of old frequencies, congested frequencies, to continue to rise up into higher dimensional spaces. The cells of our bodies are changing at the DNA level and with that a flushing out of toxins that have been stored for life.

Always, when the body doesn’t feel well, is there an even deeper invitation to go within, hold space for yourself, feel what is going on inside. My creative output of the last month has been a lot, the words just come and come with the next project and piece arising before the last one is complete. Always from joy, not obligation, does this creativity arise and is just fueled by the recently more robust response from those of you who have taken in my writing with such resonance and love.

I can feel in my heart chakra, in my chest, that I have taken in some heart cries and aches of the ‘world’…maybe because I’ve been posting about sacred romance and the longing runs so deep in our collective consciousness AND unconsciousness. Also, fourth chakra congestion is about letting in more love. This I can feel for myself and I hear Metatron offering, “Yes, Jelelle, you serve love and you give and you share AND also you let in and receive too. It is a flow, a circle, a reciprocal opportunity.”

I feel like I have been letting in this new reality of response and yet, of course, there is the adjustment that is at a deeper level, a tendril here and there of unworthiness or just a sense of surreality about what it feels like is coming for me personally and for SoulFullHeart…..a phase of growth and goodness, of new involvement and drawing more souls to engage and co-create with us.

So, with this FLU (Filaments Lighting Up!) I am going within, creating a little cocoon inside and letting in self love and care (plus the wonderful love of my beloved) and Metatron, who is a bit impatient to keep creating with me (now we are to write a book together of our dialogues with each other!) and yet, he seems OK to wait, letting this one ride out. He has about four books that he wants me to start reading anyway!

There is certainly nothing glamourous about this aspect of the ascension process, yet it feels sacred none-the-less and an important adjustment and realignment to the new consciousness and body upgrades coming in!

Jelelle Awen is an 5D ascension teacher, writer and co-creator/teacher/group facilitator of the SoulFullHeart Way Of Life. Visit soulfullheartwayoflife.com for more information about sessions, online group calls and circles, community, videos, and more.

The Inner Space Program: A Mission With Infinite Love!

Published on by Jelelle Awen2 Comments
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By Jelelle Awen

Love wants to open up the universes of unexplored territories that exist inside of you…every time you go within, you’ll discover MORE. And you feel more and more your essence AS Infinite Love. The most interesting exploratory space program is the inner space one!

When led by your curiosity and self love, infinite journeys await you as you experience the universes that exist inside of your soul and heart.

Going within, taking the space, being alone, closing the eyes, discovering the music that opens your heart and soul out (or not). Be in bed, be in nature, be on the couch, be on the floor….just BE. Connect with guides to help you navigate the sometimes foreign terrain.

Find resources to serve your explorations, open you up, and help you negotiate with the parts of you that are afraid or anxious.

Feel with your heart, let your tears flow, let your smiles come, talk out loud, emit some tones, move your body around, invite pure energy in.

Your soul knows what to do and your higher self is waiting to help. Your inner space program is waiting for you, sign up now!

Jelelle Awen is an 5D ascension teacher, writer and co-creator/teacher/group facilitator of the SoulFullHeart Way Of Life. Visit soulfullheartwayoflife.com for more information about sessions, online group calls and circles, community, videos, and more.

Go Within And Remember The Love That You ARE

Published on by Jelelle Awen1 Comment

By Jelelle Awen

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Everything impacts your vibrational frequency; sounds, smells, foods, and especially the energy of others. Our 3D self (ego/mind fusion) has layered you over with densities, literal protection shields, so that you cannot feel how impacted you are by all these things. In this layered over place, you cannot feel how your vibrational frequency is going down. Or if it is going up.

The only way to feel this is to go within, to reconnect to your inner energy system, to your emotional body, to your 3D self (and other aspects). The ‘you’ that goes within is the version that is splitting off, differentiating from the 3D self and being infused with energies from your higher 5D self or Divine self. Your higher self is always with you, waiting to arise, like a seed in your consciousness that is waiting for the water of good energy and good love to vibrate more.

Your higher self may be mostly outside of you. It may feel like when you connect with it that it feels like you are reaching for something outside of you, similar to how it can feel to connect with guides, ascended teachers, and the Divine. And, that’s OK because the important piece is that these energies, while feeling outside of you, can still infuse you with frequencies that you need to raise your base tone. They offer you light codes to activate your light body to arise and start glowing, to begin the transition from carbon-based body to crystalline-christ consciousness body.

Eventually, then, you realize that your higher self is within you and IS you more and more. As are the guides that you have ‘channeled’ or looked to others to provide the messages of their channeled guides. Validation from outside of us, people who are embracing their higher self wisdoms and personal experiences, can be very helpful. It can light up things that need to be lit up. Support from others who have journeyed in places we want to go deeper can be very helpful to, along with a community to resonate with, like we offer in SoulFullHeart.

And, then, you return to you, back inside where the power is, where the Universe is, and where the only source of Love that you can ALWAYS count on is. Going within, exploring within, learning about what is within…..the message is the same in so many different forms and yet, when you are too much your 3D self, you may find many ways to not do this and not to begin this. Looking outward may be easier than looking within for your 3D self.

Try this, right now. Pause from facebook for a moment. Close your eyes. Become present to the moment. Become present to yourself. Feel what you are feeling. Check in. Feel where your energy is at. Feel any other people that have entered your ‘field’ while you have been online, as it is a virtual ‘room’ containing many energies that you absorb like a sponge.

Feel your heart, is it open or more closed? Why?

Breath in, Breath out. Feel the world that is YOU that is waiting for your exploration of it. Stay in this inner focused space for as long as you need to and as long as you like.

Here is a guided meditation from me that helps with cleaning, protecting, and activating your chakras. Or you can just use it as practice to go within, be in more yin stillness, and to track your energy.

Go in, go in, go in, daily at least, a few times a day ideally, for as ‘long’ as it takes if possible. Create the space in your life for you. Let go of that which does not support this going within process.

Create the space for Love and to remember yourself as the essence of Infinite Love that you ARE.

Jelelle Awen is an ascending teacher, Divine guide-scribe, and co-creator/teacher of the SoulFullHeart Way Of Life. Visit soulfullheartwayoflife.com for more information and inspiration.