Masculine Energy Update: April 24, 2022

By  Raphael Awen

‘What can be shaken will be shaken’ and that’s pretty much everything.

If you thought you could create an unshakeable life, I imagine that you are either humbly and willingly reconsidering that presupposition or you are simply being forced to reconsider it.

Every electron that makes up every atom in every cell is in an oscillating push and pull kind movement. It is energy in motion and it’s trillions of times over just inside of your body alone. The solar rumblings that are going on are a macrocosm of the microcosm. You have your own ‘coronal mass ejections’ and solar flares happening inside of you on the quantum scale trillions of times over. You are not only affected by the sun, but you are affecting the sun as you are in quantum entanglement with all consciousness.

Every consensus reality that we’ve created in relationship to purpose, meaning, identity, money (exchanging ourselves in the world), romance, all of it is rumbling like never before. And it is crazymaking for our conscious minds to attempt to sort out as our conscious minds are not trained to handle this degree of shaking.

There is often nothing to do but surrender to the ride in the unknown and trust as best you can. Something from beyond our normal waking consciousness is going to have to meet you to sustain you in order to not overly suffer through this legitimate and inescapable suffering.

Take the practice of ghosting for example, that’s becoming so the norm in dating and in the workplace where recruiting is concerned. These are Titanic like behaviors of people who intuitively know that the ship is sinking, that there really is no tomorrow worth trusting in and that the default agenda is to get the most pleasure out of the immediate moment because that’s all there is. Do it at anyone else’s expense because me and my pleasure is all that matters. As nasty as that behavior is, it’s also part of the rebirth. These old masculine structures are emitting a heart cry for a death doula to assist them in completing the arc of their usefulness in our consciousness evolution, and so even the densest of hearts and souls respond to this heartcry.

Love never has allowed unanswered suffering to sustain, but love has not been afraid of allowing suffering to spike. We are in a spike like never before that is connected to, amplifying as well as answering all previous spikes.

Consciousness is reinventing itself, and it’s doing that through you and me, in your life and mine as we know it. Naturally, we feel it first as it affects how we feel as individuals, our personal life as we know it, how we feel today, but we are invited to feel it in the collective and here is where we find some answer for a balm to soothe the craziness we feel inside.

For me, in times like this, it often arises in an out of nowhere kind of feeling, of feelings of loss of wellbeing, meaning, purpose, rest and trust. I will consciously be able to feel how I have so much to be grateful for, but in these moments, I’ve lost all conscious feeling tones of that expanded gratitude. Instead, it feels gross, contracted, fearful, anxious, and hopeless. All is falling apart. There is a me there who can hold it with some self love around the experience, but the experience in moments can and does feel like it is almost all there is.

I’d love to take a poll here at this point and ask if you know of other spiritual teachers who’d be willing to admit this kind of reality inside. How many students and teachers are still busy in their ghosting worlds creating and cocreating these crumbling structures? Their purpose is just as sacred as mine, but theirs is stuck in a hell of a suffering loop if they are still busy selling wares on Titanic’s shifting deck; bullshit like how to turn your spiritual offering into a six figure or seven figure income. Six or seven figures of crumbling shit I might add!

My point is that everything is being transparented. By that I mean that everything that has been hidden is in process of being revealed. The big darknesses and the little ones. It’s not a morality police kind of revealing though. It is rather a revealing of finding and seeing how we are all one. What we do to an other, we do to ourselves. What ‘the one’ goes through, we can’t escape feeling it. Your unshakeable reality will be shaken to the place where the only salvation will be in getting real.

Getting real with yourself, with the divine, and with others. It’s the only mirror in which you will be afforded a picture of yourself that will be of any help. And incidentally, YOU do matter and how YOU fare does matter. It’s not about getting over yourself. It’s about getting into yourself and coming alive and feeling how your thrival is inextricably connected with mine and everyone else’s. If you want to survive this shaking, let alone thrive in it, you’re going to have to figure out a way to give your deepest gifts, and those gifts are about getting real first.

And herein shall also be your greatest service. Even the darkest darkness like the current holocaust injection agenda and dominations over humanity are all a part of love’s unfolding story. Love has cooked up some cliffhanger plots that outdo anything we’ve ever seen written before, but this is the level of meltdown that is currently going on.

You see, your soul, your higher self, doesn’t see your comfort and survival in this 3D domain through the lens of your conditioned 3D self parts of you. These beautiful beings helped and help you do 3D as you’ve needed to, but now their vessel has been breached, they are at fatal threat until you can answer and reconcile what it is that you really want, and THEN, move towards it in some way.

I’d like to invite you to take such a step in joining our online free portal at https://soulfullheartportal.mn.co/. I’m being called to gather like hearts and souls into a resonance space to support one another, get to know and interact with one another and move forward through the craziness together. It feels like it’s either that or lay down and die. I want the former. How about you? I’d like to invite you not just to join me in this portal, but to invite others as well.

Lots more to come from life, from love, from this crazy ride. Let’s plan accordingly.

Raphael

(Photo taken by Tosi Philippe on April 22, 2022 )

Raphael Awen is co-creator, teacher, and facilitator of the SoulFullHeart Way Of Life.  Visit soulfullheart.org for more information about sessions, events, videos, etc. 

Now Free: We are now offering for free our SoulFullHeart Portal on Mighty Networks, a virtual gathering place for sharing exclusive content from us such as energy update writings and guided meditation videos, plus community forum threads with topics and groups that you can read, join, and contribute to as you want. You can join us at the SoulFullHeart Portal here: soulfullheartportal.mn.co/

Finding Your Soul Tribe

By  Raphael Awen

Do you see yourself in some ways as different and unique from anyone else you’ve ever met?

Have you ever looked out upon the sea of spiritual offerings and spiritual teachers and the people in those communities, and just honestly said to yourself, I just can’t see myself being a genuine part of anything I can see out there?!

I have.

Prior to that, I have also found myself in long term settings and groups thinking I was there for life. I’d found the truth and that felt good to be settled around that, until that ‘nest for life’ became evident that the mama eagle was again making the nest prickly, preparing me to make a do or die leap from the nest, into a new world of flight.

Belonging and being a part of something larger than just myself was wired in me. That part I didn’t question. What I did come to question in community experience very deeply was where was the transparency, the vulnerability, and sometimes just where was the garden variety honesty in everyday life.

I knew I was being invited to become more and more honest with myself, but I wasn’t so sure the group I was a part of wanted that like I wanted it. The culture that we had created up till then was a different kind of social contract between us, and now, I was the one seeking to revise the unspoken agreements and sub-agreements within our dynamics.

I knew all too well, just from looking within myself, that people who believe they have thee truth are set upon preserving that truth, exporting that truth, feeling good about themselves for having found such worthy occupation and even divine calling.

I knew I was breaking a contract. The words of ‘I’m here forever’ had to be revised to mean that ‘you are in my heart forever, but I am called to journey outside of this precious home that has held me and you and us so beautifully for the time that it has’.

Not one person from within my known world wanted to join me in that kind of exploration. They remained true to the culture we had upheld so faithfully. And It wasn’t their time, simply like how for me, in a couple decades worth of belonging within something, it hadn’t been my time to look beyond its comforting confines. I grew and bloomed where I was planted; until I simply no longer could.

What came next however, was a deep despair.

I knew that if I found anything that just felt real, really real, transparently real, I’d be wanting to be a part of it. But whatever I checked out in the worlds of spirituality that I previously felt were way off in my watertight convictions about what was really true, I came to feel that the same kind of hiding from my former worlds was going on relationally and emotionally in the social fabric of these communities I considered being a part of. The frequencies may have been higher, and more evolved, and more sophisticated, and even more resonant in many ways, but I was stuck on this inescapable bottom line point of that unless we get real, with ourselves and in turn with one another, there really isn’t any hope for meaningful change, or any hope for truly having any fun for that matter.

I thought about how it might look to go forward in life, without really being much a part of anything deeper community wise. I didn’t like that feeling.

That’s precisely when I felt called to lead something new and to be a part of something new. I was surprised by seeing my lifelong focus of finding the right group led by others, within which I could really shine, in someone else’s container, seeing that arrangement have to be let go of, in order to say yes to something new, in order to say yes to a calling. As destiny would so beautifully have it, I was given a mate, Jelelle, with which to share and fuel that dream, and things unfolded to today.

But back to you for a moment, if I may?…

Where are you at? What are you feeling in your truth as you so graciously take in my truth? What are you doing with your own version of feeling (if that is in fact what you are feeling) that you can’t find a place you could fit in, with your honesty, with your transparency, with your truth, with your feelings of having outgrown previous settings and previous ways of being? What is it that you really want? I believe there is something apparent to you that you really want, and that something answers the rest of the somethings that need answering.

I’m saying all this to extend an invite to you, but honestly, it’s not really an ‘everyone welcome’ sign like the one that so unconditionally lovingly sits out front many churches, communities or spiritual groups. I know too much about what can’t work for me to make that kind of invitation. Everyone is welcome in my heart as my equal, but not to have in my active connection as it’s only through shared resonance around shared values that makes for a real connection. My invite is more exclusive. All of us, I feel, kind of self-organize into where we find deep and true resonance.

My invite today is more exclusive to those who share this honesty piece, this despair piece, this yearning for something different piece. My invitation is to come in closer in deep resonance and transparency in community.

What could shared resonance in shared community look like for you? How could your sovereignty be enhanced rather than sacrificed by being a part of something meaningful?

I may well be speaking to a single soul right now. I know this is meant for someone and maybe some more ones beyond that. But one is really all that matters, because the all is contained in the one, and the one is contained in the all.

On one hand, I don’t need you to be interested in my offer, as I feel a deep trust in the divine within that this desire in me, is destined to continue to be fulfilled, but on the other hand, unless a you, if not you, shows up to play, I have less with whom to play. I can’t be fulfilled as an island to myself. I need you. I want you. I’m not complete without you.

Ok, this is getting a bit deep. I’ll try not to apologize for my passion, and instead simply ask you to check into who I am, who my wife and I are as a couple, what we lead and offer, and beyond to who we are as a community, to feel if what you’ve felt rumble and resonate in you in my words today has any legs beyond remaining in a distant orbit in our galaxy.

I really do hope you find where you are meant to be where you thrive, flourish and grow like a weed, but with the beauty and bounty of a rose. I hope you get smelled and appreciated often, up close and personal, for your true fragrance. I hope a year from now, that you and those around you hardly recognize you for the aliveness that’s unfolded in you.

But please choose. For your sake, for mine, and all of ours. Nothing changes the world like your choice does and ongoingly finding your place.

There’s a few places to check deeper into my world, here on Facebook, on our website, YouTube, group calls, etc. I’d be beyond delighted to hear from you personally and I promise most of all to be real, and treasure your reaching out! 💚🌹🏄🏻‍♂️🙏🏻

Thanks for feeling this and allowing it to take you where it will.

Much love,

Raphael

Raphael Awen is co-creator, teacher, and facilitator of the SoulFullHeart Way Of Life.  Visit soulfullheart.org for more information about sessions, events, videos, etc. 

Now Free: We are now offering for free our SoulFullHeart Portal on Mighty Networks, a virtual gathering place for sharing exclusive content from us such as energy update writings and guided meditation videos, plus community forum threads with topics and groups that you can read, join, and contribute to as you want. You can join us at the SoulFullHeart Portal here: soulfullheartportal.mn.co/

Living Between The Time And No-time Dimensions

By  Raphael Awen

I live in a village where church bells chime on the hour, every hour, reminding us of the dimension of time.

In time, there are many urgencies of what should and shouldn’t be. What would our lives be if it wasn’t for such urgencies? How could we maintain a sense of what life is and who we are without such parameters?

Outside of time, there are no urgencies, for all is both waiting to happen and has already happened. Both are equally true outside of time where all potentialities and outcomes equally exist.

If that’s true, and if it’s also true that you and I span the time and the no-time dimensions in the larger sense of who and what we are, then that opens up a whole other way of seeing and feeling our lives than we normally do in the more familiar time dimension.

Maybe the point of the things I want to do today in the time dimension, as well as the pretzel of sorting out what best deserves my time, and then sorting the next pretzel of finding the time and energy for such worthy doings; maybe all of that wants to be informed by the no-time dimension where it’s already all done, where doing doesn’t happen.

What we’d be left with would I imagine be something resembling play, like kids building forts with tea sets inside. It wouldn’t be a ‘real’ grown up house and a real grown up tea time, but as I recall, I never quite found something in all my adult years as simply fun and engaging as true play to the tune of what I did in childhood.

Maybe your and my inner child hasn’t actually become adapted to all these hourly reminders all around everywhere, the ones on our wrists, and the devices in our hands, keeping us here in the not so fun territory, in a world that feels overdosed on real.

Maybe it’s our inner children that hold the portal back to our essence and are inviting us into what they actually never lost, thank God, but only forgot, in our rush to grow up.

I recall the hour spent in church strangely as the most imprisoned and boring hour growing up, where time surely could not move any slower, like we needed to suffer in the time dimension, like we needed to shed a whole essence of our being and conform to something we were not.

Maybe we did need that. Maybe the church, like all of our institutions are still reminding us of how boring time is, when play is lost, how boredom is like a drill that bores vacuums in our lives that create space for new things to come in, which things are aching something out in us like a kid attempting to to sit still in church, an ache that precedes new creation.

How did we expect to find what we want if we didn’t encounter what we don’t want? Both are equally sacred and both took a lot of courage to choose. You are this courageous, for you chose to be here in both, both the longing and the realization of remembering and expanding on the divinity that you are, even through the comparison of discovering what it isn’t.

You and I are so surrounded by so much divinity on all sides that the things that don’t feel or look very divine are just dimmer switches and moderators allowing for the stuff we are learning and unlearning. This is all happening in the gap that is created in our perception between what is seen as divine and what isn’t.

I’m going to see if I can breathe in a whole big breath of no-time love from the no-time dimension side of my being in order to be with the time pretzels I feel around me in the time dimension, let the two of them get to know each other more.

Maybe as you and I figure this out, we solve this conundrum and deposit the answer/download somewhere in the no-time databank where it’s actually already solved somehow.

And here is where not only you and I get to be part of the deposit and the withdrawal from the time side of our experience, but so does everyone else get to be part of it. There is only one of us after all for whom all of this is and is being sorted out for.

Raphael Awen is co-creator, teacher, and facilitator of the SoulFullHeart Way Of Life.  Visit soulfullheart.org for more information about sessions, events, videos, etc. 

Now Free: We are now offering for free our SoulFullHeart Portal on Mighty Networks, a virtual gathering place for sharing exclusive content from us such as energy update writings and guided meditation videos, plus community forum threads with topics and groups that you can read, join, and contribute to as you want. You can join us at the SoulFullHeart Portal here: soulfullheartportal.mn.co/

The Portal Of Our Separation Wound

By  Raphael Awen

Deep, potent, powerful transformation is available to all of us, but this accelerated and conscious version of our growth, only occurs as we are willing to go inward to transparently and vulnerably feel our fears.

Growth and forward momentum is guaranteed whether we choose this accelerated path or not, as we are all immersed in the learning and growth vehicle we call life, and it’s wired for growth and the ultimate and ongoing reconciliation with the divine that we are. But some of us are just impatient!

We have so many levels of growth and learning that await us, but for now, our primary familiar level of conscious awareness on this earth plane is our gateway to the higher ones we crave and yearn for. If that’s true, then what you have probably felt was a hindrance to your awakening is actually instead the opportunity for it.

If we can choose a surrender over a success kind of mindset; reconciliation over attainments; stewarding over possessing, then we get closer to where what before felt like blocks, hindrances and missing capacities, are now readily transmuted into portals to the real and truer thing that’s underneath the attachments to the false thing. Here you are presented with what you really want.

This should be a big sigh of relief as you toss out all the technique based how to manuals that only ultimately helped you run out of gas for the self discipline (torture) picture of spirituality. Your time of slaving in return for breadcrumbs of your essence is over if you are ready for it to be over.

Somewhere next in here, you are faced with the challenge of having what you really want, which you before assumed was instant bliss, goodness and happiness and instead are surprised to see that even here, negotiation and adjustment are needed.

Parts of you are losing a familiar territory where they learned to live in some dimension of lack, and they need to be embraced and honored for the service they’ve given and the posts they’ve held. Their reactions are actually the keys to the portal through these reactions – reactions are movements, not something to be overcome or worse yet, ‘mastered’. The only place the word mastery deserves a place in your lexicon is the mastery of surrender, which is not the attainment of personal power over something, but instead the letting go of that now false, and maybe once treasured power, into the power ‘under’ something, the power that underlies and animates all things, that can’t be attained, only surrendered into. That’s good news because falling is a whole lot easier than climbing, yes?!

It’s crazy making to get so much closer to the bliss you wanted and chose only to find more formidable blocks that make you wonder why you set out on this journey in the first place.

I believe what you and I are carrying deep within us is 2 divine programs, if I could call them that. These are benevolent programs that we actually not only agreed to, but were also the creators of, and also the why of why we were willing to be individuated from the divine from oneness into this twoness/duality where we retained everything we once were, but also agreed to these 2 paths or journeys of forgetting and remembering in it all.

The forgetting and remembering that you and I are playing out, we are playing it out together, with each of us at different stages, but all dependent and connected to one another. No one arrives home until all arrive home.

The forgetting program involves a deep wound, an ache that calls for our attention. This wound is the separation wound, where both consciously, but mostly unconsciously, we carry and express an inner knowing of something lost, something so precious that we almost wish we never knew of such goodness, for the pain that a single ounce of this remembering piques in us.

But this program alone without a countering program would be pure torture. The other program we have and possess is the program to remember. I believe your and my full remembrance of everything we lost is not only baked in the cake, but this remembrance even excels the original state we forfeited and takes it into ongoing creative expansion of more. This is the what and the why our souls embraced this plan with such abandon.

We knew that for the divine to have the opportunity to meet and get to know itself for the first time would be a sacred union like no other. The divine couldn’t do this without forgetting and remembering, and it decided to do it billions of times over and over with individuated consciosness’s called you and me.

The heights of our tension though is at these crazy making points where our surrender into the crazy is asked for. This is the process of death and rebirth. Something that once lived, breathed and had purpose and meaning is dying, concluding, wrapping up, preparing to breathe its last and it needs someone to hold space, a hospice kind of space, an open heart space for it to wrap up. This is pieces and parts of you that are transmuting through death and rebirth even as your physical body and name address on the planet has continuity.

This is where time spent in palliative care and the nursery of your inner hospital often occurs on the same day as you participate in goodbyes and hellos to old you and new arising you.

I invite you to embrace the separation wound as it lives in you and however it is currently expressing in your life circumstances.  Here you will find is where the remembering is also happening in the fullest swing you can self lovingly handle, where every piece has time and space to be savoured, honored and transmuted.

Here is your greatest service of love, which helps you recognize your unique youness, which is integral to reuniting fully with the divine without losing yourself in the divine. The divine wants union which is about 2 coming together, over and over again. This means you never lose your individuality. It only keeps shifting and changing into more. You’ll need more you to be in this kind of union.

We need each other to get on with this more and more as each of our attainments are a co-op kind of shared agreement of ownership. Your gain is mine and vice versa.

I hope this lands in you as an answer to some deep questions you’ve been asking. I felt some distress calls as I was writing this today.

Jelelle Awen and I are hosting a group call this Sunday to connect more around the separation wound which will get into more of this, in a heart and feeling space with others, where something magical always occurs for everyone present. I’d like to invite you if this calls to you. Details here: https://www.soulfullheart.org/events 💚

And there’s also our free SoulFullHeart Portal to climatize more to these energies and fellow inclined people. You can join here:

https://soulfullheartportal.mn.co/

Thank you for reading and thank you for connecting.

Much love,

Raphael

It even got cool enough this week to break out the toques, which has been a rare thing this warm winter here in central Portugal. This is at the Mondego river which runs through Coimbra city, Portugal’s third largest (if I’m not mistaken), a place we go for some adventure at times and new shoes, which we found for Jelelle!

Raphael Awen is co-creator, teacher, and facilitator of the SoulFullHeart Way Of Life.  Visit soulfullheart.org for more information about sessions, events, videos, etc. 

Now Free: We are now offering for free our SoulFullHeart Portal on Mighty Networks, a virtual gathering place for sharing exclusive content from us such as energy update writings and guided meditation videos, plus community forum threads with topics and groups that you can read, join, and contribute to as you want. You can join us at the SoulFullHeart Portal here: soulfullheartportal.mn.co/

A Valentine From Divine You To You

By  Raphael Awen

May the valentine you receive today be the best one ever, from the divine in gratitude for your participation in time and space and this density – for your willingness to be in the game of awakening and lifting veils and discovering what wouldn’t and couldn’t be discovered without your part.

May the valentine you send be addressed to the All of which you also are as an individual – in-divi-dual – an undividable twoness – both one among many and inextricably undivided from the All.

You are both the one and many, hence you can write your own Valentine’s – you are the to and the from in this greatest, and ever greatening love story.

May not one ounce of the suffering you experience in this experiment be left unclaimed for the pound of gold that has your name on it! The love here is overwhelming and love itself needs takers in this infinitely expanding reality. Fret not for the temporary limitation you perceive, for even the limitation is born out of and created out of the abundance.

Even the dark ones currently pulling the big levers of power are equally a part of this grand unfolding. Their amnesia of who they really are will turn to amnesty as they awaken to their roles, receive the built in forgiveness for the playing the necessary dark roles to this love story. Our hearts will recognize the darkest deeds are in service of the light. Our hearts will recognize that the slightest offense to love differs not to the grandest one. Love forgives all.

If you can be forgiven, so can Justin, right? And his dad too, and Hillary, and Bill, and the whole lot of them. There’s only one lot, and they are a lot to love, but you have this lot in you and this is the lot you are a part of.

Happy Valentine’s Day to you, Jelelle! For being so deeply and profoundly joined with me, busy being in love’s overwhelm and calm, love’s forgetting and remembering.

Happy Valentine’s Day TO you, FROM you and THROUGH you!

YOU are the hot stuff the world waits for.

~ R ~

Raphael Awen is co-creator, teacher, and facilitator of the SoulFullHeart Way Of Life.  Visit soulfullheart.org for more information about sessions, events, videos, etc. 

Now Free: We are now offering for free our SoulFullHeart Portal on Mighty Networks, a virtual gathering place for sharing exclusive content from us such as energy update writings and guided meditation videos, plus community forum threads with topics and groups that you can read, join, and contribute to as you want. You can join us at the SoulFullHeart Portal here: soulfullheartportal.mn.co/

A Love Story: Part Four (Enter At Your Own Risk)

By Raianna Shai

I finally made it to part four of my love story series! This is a full on post instead of a poem, so I’ll keep this preface short and sweet.

I had a moment last year while trying to rediscover myself and my purpose when I realized that the part of me that I’ve judged and kept protected is actually one of my greatest gifts. I’ve been so held back by fear of my own emotions and what other people may think of me that it’s been so hard to let myself just be honest and real.

Even when I would share my feelings in a relationship, I would try to soften it to not make it sound “too much” or “too unfair”. But I’m finally reaching the point of realizing that risking judgement and blowing up a relationship is worth it when your truth could actually bring you and the other person into something new and meaningful. Yes, truth can hurt and harm others – but so can holding it back. At least the former allows you both the opportunity to show up and grow into new ground.

———————————————————————

A Love Story: Part Four
Enter At Your Own Risk

So much of our lives are spent worrying and fearing what might happen. We close ourselves off knowing we could potentially be hurt if we don’t. We don’t tell people how we feel, we don’t open up our hearts to one another, we don’t commit to something that means a lot to us, we sabotage ourselves in the name of safety, comfort and preservation.

But when I think of all those beautiful moments in life that we’re constantly searching for – have we ever gotten there without risk? Have you ever fallen in love without being vulnerable? Or felt a deep sense of connection with someone without the risk of being rejected or judged? Has there ever been a moment of true and real emotion that hasn’t come with an underlying fear of abandonment?

We try so hard to avoid the mess – the heartbreak, the judgement from others, criticism – but with that, we avoid the bliss.

Something I’ve realized about myself over the last few months is that I am incredibly sensitive and emotional and for maybe the first moment in my life I 100% love that part of me. I’ve spent so long worrying that I would be seen as too much, as pushing people in my life to be someone they’re not in order to match me, as being overly sensitive and insecure. Insecurity can come with sensitivity but so can strength.

When I let myself be me, I have the strength to sit with someone and pour my heart out to them. I have the strength to feel my feelings on full blast without having a wall up to protect myself from others. I have the strength to love with such depth that I genuinely worry I’ll get lost in it.

And sometimes I do. Sometimes I forget how beautiful my heart is and how much it deserves to be loved back just as powerfully. I just want to be seen and felt in all my glory.

Love,
Raianna Shai

~~~

Raianna Shai is a SoulFullHeart facilitant and website designer for SoulFullHeart Healing, a healing process and paradigm offering New Gaia Ascension frequencies to transmute trauma into love on emotional/spiritual/physical levels. For more information about free consultations and 1:1 individual sessions with SoulFullHeart Facilitators, writings/books, and videos, visit soulfullheartwayoflife.com.

A Digestion Of The Deepen 2022 Video Series

By Raianna Shai

This SoulFullHeart video series is such an incredible way to get to know yourself to an incredible deep level. They’re full of teachings and meditations that are so valuable for discovering who you are, why you feel and react the way you do, what your gifts are and how to heal even your deepest wounds. I’ve been doing this series for the last two weeks or so and even the more “basic” videos have been so enlivening and core to my current healing process.

There’s something special about connecting to 31 different videos that slowly but thoroughly help you dive into any and all places that need your attention. They can be taken in at any pace and at any time which allows you to go deeper into any process that feels relevant.

I have been on a deep journey of discovering my divine empowered woman and these videos have brought so many connections to light inside of me. They have taught me how much my inner mother wants to care take everyone to the point where it doesn’t allow others, or other parts of me, to live into their bigness and grow into the person they’re capable of. They have taught me that my inner teenager is ready to blossom and become a woman capable of setting boundaries and advocating for herself and the capacity of others.

They have woken up my inner protector enough for him to realize that he can’t keep me small and locked in my bedroom anymore. This journey has strengthened belief in myself and what I have to gift others. I have been able to dive into my shadow in a way that I was way to scared to before and recognize patterns that have been so detrimental to my own growth as well as those around me, even if for a good reason.

So thank you Jelelle, Raphael and soon Kasha and Gabriel for providing me with the tools I need to love and care for myself in a way that serves both myself and the collective ❤️

For more information about the Deepen 2022 series including a full listing of the content covered over 31 days, a playlist featuring each video released so far, and information about the two Deepen 2022 group calls, visit http://www.soulfullheart.org/deepen2022

Love, Raianna

~~~

Raianna Shai is a SoulFullHeart facilitant and website designer for SoulFullHeart Healing, a healing process and paradigm offering New Gaia Ascension frequencies to transmute trauma into love on emotional/spiritual/physical levels. For more information about free consultations and 1:1 individual sessions with SoulFullHeart Facilitators, writings/books, and videos, visit soulfullheartwayoflife.com.

A Love Story: Part Two (Falling In Love)

By Raianna Shai

The next part of this story is the part that we tend to spend our lives looking for: falling in love. The new and exciting rush of meeting someone that has an equal interest in us as we do in them. A new pair of eyes to see you, new ears to hear your passions and desires, new hands to touch the lonely and unloved parts of you inside and out. It sparks a hope in us that nothing like love can. We hope that this person will be the one we can grow with, who will understand us and treat us the way we’ve always dreamed of being treated.

More importantly than this outside love is what it sparks inside of us. It can allow us to love ourselves more than ever before while also bringing up our deepest insecurities. We begin by showing the brightest and shiniest parts of ourselves, hoping that will win them over. The way we enter a relationship is so telling of where we are at on the inside.

I remember the moment I wrote this poem, sitting under a tree staring out at the water. I felt elated and overcome by pure hope and love. I looked up at the leaves and they looked brighter than usual, almost as if they were glowing. In that moment I remembered feeling this way before. And then I remembered it fading and eventually leaving me completely. But it didn’t matter. Feeling it again reminded me of why we continue to search for this feeling over and over again even when it leads to pain or heartbreak.

This feeling is a reminder of what we are capable of feeling, with or without another person. All someone else can do is illuminate what’s possible in our own hearts and souls. Each relationship gets us closer and closer to this feeling of ecstasy and love inside of ourselves and without another person. We can feel this way with the divine, with our own inner parts, with our inner sacred union.

Without heartbreak, shadow and pain we cannot understand what it truly feels like to be in love and peace from the inside out. 💛

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A Love Story: Part Two
Falling In Love

This feeling of falling in love
With you and
With every part of me
Is like coming home

This is what my soul knows
What it’s been waiting to come back to
To feeling nourished
To feeling loved from the inside out
To loving the outside in

I see your face and smile
And even if it doesn’t work out
This feeling right here, right now
Is worth it all
This is what it’s all about

Freezing this moment and remembering
This is what we work so hard to get back to
This is why we dive deep
This is why we feel our shadow

Love,
Raianna Shai
SoulFullHeart Way Of Life

~~~

Raianna Shai is a SoulFullHeart facilitant and website designer for SoulFullHeart Healing, a healing process and paradigm offering New Gaia Ascension frequencies to transmute trauma into love on emotional/spiritual/physical levels. For more information about free consultations and 1:1 individual sessions with SoulFullHeart Facilitators, writings/books, and videos, visit soulfullheartwayoflife.com.

A Love Story: Part One (Heartbreak & Healing)

By Raianna Shai

I woke up this morning with the urge to create through writing but couldn’t quite figure out what I wanted to write about. I started scrolling through the notes in my phone and found several writings I wrote over the past two years that really brought me back to the moment and phase they were written. Interestingly, I found 6 pieces that seemed to represent a cycle from beginning to end and back to the beginning again.

This cycle in particular represented the phase of the ending of a relationship, to the beginning of a new one, to the end once again. It felt like a really beautiful arc of letting in and letting go and everything that goes on in between. I felt myself recognizing the patterns of relationships and realizing that even when things come to an end, they are so worth the journey in and out.

This isn’t just true for romantic relationships but for careers, geographical moves, finding your soul purpose, healing a trauma and moving into your next phase of growth. As humans, we continually go through cycles in every part of our lives and the only thing we can do is become conscious of them. After a death of a phase you may wonder, what’s the point? But looking back you may notice how much has changed from beginning to end.

Falling in love is beautiful, messy, painful, exhilarating and everything in between but just like any other death and rebirth, it’s so important in facilitating our growth. Each layer brings new realizations and understanding of what it means to find love and purpose in these human and divine lives of ours. We cannot exist without cycles, for without them we cannot understand the gift of being human.

To show what I mean I thought I would share these 6 writings as a marker of each layer that these cycles can illuminate and provide. Particularly in the context of relationships. The first one I felt to share is both the ending of one relationship and the beginning of another. Marking the phase of overlapping death and rebirth ❤️

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A Love Story: Part One
Heartbreak & Healing

I sit here
Gathering the pieces of my heart
Trying to glue them back together
The mismatched edges
And sharp corners
Almost fitting perfectly
And then not at all

You wait there
Patiently watching my broken pieces
That long for that perfect edge’s embrace
Slowly come together
All the while knowing
That one day I will come

I will come with just enough pieces
To hold together the contents of my love
When I am still chipped, but no longer broken

You are there
With your chipped pieces
Already glued together
With as much accuracy as truth can allow

And we come together
Look at that!
Our broken pieces create a mosaic of lost loves and tearful goodbyes
Not perfect, but beautiful all the same

Love,
Raianna Shai
SoulFullHeart Way Of Life

~~~

Raianna Shai is a SoulFullHeart facilitant and website designer for SoulFullHeart Healing, a healing process and paradigm offering New Gaia Ascension frequencies to transmute trauma into love on emotional/spiritual/physical levels. For more information about free consultations and 1:1 individual sessions with SoulFullHeart Facilitators, writings/books, and videos, visit soulfullheartwayoflife.com.

Sacred Desires And Fears – Both Are Our Portal To Full Remembrance

By  Raphael Awen

The thing we desire the most is also the thing we fear the most.

We want something that represents a feeling or assurance of some kind of more, but not too much more. We set our sights on attainable, reachable and manageable goals.

To shoot higher is to set ourselves up for failure, or even worse, to somehow attain that great and high thing, but then have to live with the fear of falling from such a greater height.

If all of our dreams somehow came true, how would we hold it together?

So we tend to settle for this half life of being in resistance with both our desires and our fears. They are both to blame and to be held accountable. Were it not for them, there wouldn’t be any tension. All that would be left would be bliss.

But to go and find some kind of life configuration that helps you kill both desire and fear, is to choose to not live, suicide in slow motion. Doesn’t most spiritual practices, paradigms, therapies and ways of life have at their core, this root of managing fears and desires?

Trouble is though that a human being is one of both desire and fear, and fears and desires are such great forces, that they can never really be managed. At best, they can be suppressed for a time only to emerge in your life with more strength than when you tried to disown them.

I am especially feeling this as we approach the new year, and feeling how feeling fears and desires opens us out to set an intention for the new year, seeing it for the portal that it offers us.

This is so different from the standard ‘New Years resolution’ energy, whereby you need to mount a self-discipline campaign, essentially suppressing the needs and desires of one part of you to allow another one to have its needs met. That’s about dominance, overcoming and suppression, one part of our being colonizing vast and beautiful territories of other parts of our being. The victor never feels at peace with the winnings because it doesn’t contain any peace. Possession requires constant vigilance to stay on top.

For the year to come, what can I feel within my desire body to receive as a shift in being, a shift in nourishment, a shift in getting deeper and truer needs met?

What fears can I feel inside of my heart space that are wanting to find transformation? What irritations and vibrations come up for me in whatever cycle or situations that they do? Why have I needed them up till now?

Could I truly embrace both of these fear and desire polarities within who at first seem to be holding each other at a standoff, but upon closer feeling and observation, I see that each holds the key to each other’s freedom?

I believe this is the deeper ground of truly setting an intention that has true power in it. It has power because it is able to surrender to both desire and fear, not because it overcame one at the expense of the other.

This feels like not only our great personal internal lesson of reconciliation with our divinity, but also like the great cosmic soul’s lesson before us as we watch the playouts of last year’s bifurcating events and narratives about the fears of death, carrying over into the new year at increasing levels of fear and polarization. Whether you’re afraid of the virus or it’s cure, it is the biggest monster in the room right now for so many, bringing up our personal fears within.

How could these heightened crazy times we find ourselves living in with many seemingly impossible situations be a turning point for you personally where your fears and desires are concerned?

This doula of death that showed up is here with consciousness’ permission and authority to help something transform that has wanted and needs to die and be reborn for a long time. Death isn’t ‘death’ as in an obliteration of energy. It’s always about change.

I’ve been quite taken with keeping up with news headlines a few times a day whether alternative or mainstream, for years now, seemingly scanning the horizon for evidence of this great death and rebirth, as if my personal fulfillment is dependent on the collective shifting, even while knowing the agenda in the news cycle. I’m feeling my being rising to a higher octave where the ‘news’ now needs to come from within, my own reports of what’s new from my own heart and soul domains.

I feel an intention brewing for the year to come of changing this relationship with the news, and it feels sooo inviting. Something deeply nourishing wants to replace what felt before felt nourishing, but no longer does.

What are you desiring for the year to come?

Deepen 22!

Jelelle Awen and I are releasing a daily video series beginning January 1st for the month offering daily short guided meditations and an overview of the SoulFullHeart way of life, and I’d love to have you join us if you feel drawn. It’s free to be a part of, but we’d love to receive your exchange with us in the form of donations for whatever ways it helps and assists you through where you are shifting and moving. You will find it on our YouTube channel: https://youtube.com/c/SoulFullHeartExperience

4 days from now we have our 12:12 Portal Transmission and Guided Meditation Group Call. I hope you can join us live at 5:00pm GMT/12:00 EST/9:00am EST on Sunday, December 12th and/or receive the recording by whatever donation you feel to give (usual is about $15 CAD) via soulfullheart.org/shop or paypal.me/jelelleawen.

More info at soulfullheart.org/grouptransmissions and https://www.facebook.com/events/328536115365602

Much love to you on your sacred journey,

Raphael

Raphael Awen is co-creator, teacher, and facilitator of the SoulFullHeart Way Of Life.  Visit soulfullheart.org for more information about sessions, events, videos, etc. 

Now Free: We are now offering for free our SoulFullHeart Portal on Mighty Networks, a virtual gathering place for sharing exclusive content from us such as energy update writings and guided meditation videos, plus community forum threads with topics and groups that you can read, join, and contribute to as you want. You can join us at the SoulFullHeart Portal here: soulfullheartportal.mn.co/

Photo courtesy of Kunai Shinde: https://unsplash.com/photos/-f0YLss50Bs