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BIG Solar Waves, Kundalini Activations, Lemurian/Atlantis Bleed Throughs: Energy Update W/Jelelle Awen (Video)

Published on by Jelelle Awen1 Comment

Strong solar (SOULar) pulses and waves coming in during this March, 2018 as the Ascension process continues to increase and amplify. SoulFullHeart Co-creator, facilitator, and teacher Jelelle Awen offers in this video (click above) an energy update sharing her sense of how these waves may be impacting you on an emotional, physical, and Metasoul/Higher Self level. She shares about recent experiences of Kundalini energy surges and connection/bleed through with her Metasoul Aspect from the Lemurian Timeline.

Jelelle also walks you through a simple check-in of your energy flow through your feet chakra and using selenite to clean and clear too. Jelelle emphasizes that these energies are a GIFT, even as they can feel quite intense to let in and adjust to. They are meant to raise your consciousness, your experience of yourself AS love.

She also mentions that she’ll be provided regular updates about the energies in these next days of March, plus a free Unity Meditation call that she is doing on Wednesday, March 21st. She is also now offering one on one session with her called a Bridging Session where she feels and digests your ascension process so far, where you are at now (energy, emotional body, etc.) and the manifestation of your highest timeline.

For more information about the meditation and other SoulFullHeart events, go to http://www.soulfullheartwayoflife.com/events. For more information about the Bridging session with Jelelle and our other programs, go here: http://www.soulfullheartwayoflife.com/sessions

To read a recent writing about these SOULar energies, go here: https://soulfullheartblog.com/2018/03/14/march-energies-update-solar-storms-flares-amplify-bliss-and-mess-states/

Visit http://www.soulfullheartwayoflife.com/ for more information about SoulFullHeart offerings/programs, writings, videos, books, group calls, and more.

To offer a money donation to support our services of love, visit http://www.soulfullheartwayoflife.com/donations

The More You Already Are

Published on by Raphael AwenLeave a comment

By Raphael Awen

If you could have anything you ever wanted, or ever will want, how would that change your life in the long run?

Forget about the three wishes and the Aladdin’s lamp scenario. In today’s deal, there’s no limits what-so-ever, so no need to choose any prioritization.

You don’t need to deliberate over whether a billion dollars is more important than personal happiness, etc. You can have it all, physically, financially, spiritually, emotionally, sensually, sexually, and whatever other ‘ally’ you can think of…I must have missed a few, right?

Oh, yes, cosmically, galactically, socially, mentally, environmentally….

Where would you start?

I’d start on the first thing my heart or body or mind or spirit had appetite for. There’s places to visit and experiences to be had for sure, and I’d start with them, but I guess I wouldn’t be doing any of those things to be happier, because I’d have already dialed up all the happiness I wanted as well. This world of no limits whatsoever would be pretty crazy wouldn’t it, and something to get used to?

Before too long, I wouldn’t be operating from any sense of need or desire, because I have or can have whatsoever my heart desires, and then that desire would now be shifted to a fulfillment. I’d have to use some of this creative power to create some needs or desires, or I wouldn’t have any basis for existing in this dimension of experience and pleasure.

How do you define a pleasure without a displeasure to compare it to? A five star hotel only gets its appeal from comparing it to four star, or a three star, or a dumpy slummy kind of dwelling.

How do you define joy without knowing some sorrow?
Can your capacity for joy be separated from your capacity for sorrow?

It’s kind of like the trade off involved when you take an anxiety or depression medication. The med takes out the lows, but it also takes out the highs. It removes you from the range of your emotionality, as well as your humanity.

My guess is that before too long, I would want to be given back at least some of the aspects of my life of genuine unfulfillments and unmet desires, if I was to remain in a human experience in a world of duality (good, better, best, and not so good, etc). Unless of course, I just wanted to be done with this whole reality and cash in my chips. But, you and I wouldn’t be here were it not for some gain, some payoff that makes it all worth the ride, is my sense of it.

Now, let me ask you one more question.

What if, and this is a big ‘what if’, so get ready for it…., ‘what if this above have-it-all scenario and its play outs are exactly (underline exactly) what’s true for you and I on a higher level?’

If we all came from oneness-allness-Divine-source, (or whatever you want to call it, because even if you call it bananas, even bananas are an expression of it) the only thing the Divine didn’t possess was the ability to experience lack, or unfulfillment.

It seems the Divine needed and wanted to know lack, so it could come to experience greater fulfillments that the fullness of fulfillment it already knew. Full fullfilment isn’t actually possible in an ever expanding infinite love reality. It always wants more. It’s never actually fully satisfied. One glory leads to the wanting of more.

This feels so true to me and explains so much of our human behaviors. Addictions are not about our wanting too much, but rather about the fear of being possessed by our wanter, so we settle for the behavior or the substance to keep us from falling into what we fear of the abyss of never-ending want. We have a phobia of our wanter, so we lock it into lesser pleasures.

So, if that feels true, the next questions in our quest are then something like how could the All come to know lack? How could it be safe or desirable to give up Allness in some way to experience and know lack or absence?

My heart tells me that the only way consciousness would accept such a wild ride of departure from fullness would be on the condition of never actually losing the fullness, but only the awareness of it.

For the experience of lack to be real enough, and ‘enough’ is the key word here, it had to feel real. That could happen in a simulated reality we call life, where the simulated reality is one of many being generated by the Allness Reality Simulator, where we have a higher and a lower reality, both of which are equally true.

Here, we come to see and begin to feel that we never lost any fullness in our journey through lack. Lack is actually an expression of our fullness. Wow.

Trippy, huh? And all I’ve had to drink today is a second cup of Cacao and some fruit smoothie! Didn’t even need Ayahuasca!

Now, we come to see and feel that we agreed to forget our essence, only upon the condition that we would never lose possession of our essence. We knew there would be an awakening journey experience that we dialed up for ourselves, and that was the gold we chose over the gold we had.

You are living in an expression right now of your deepest power and superabundance as you experience lack and pain. You dialed up the experiential journey of forgetting, in order to have the felt experience of being re-MEMBERED with your essence.

And then, the cooler part still is that you did it for a net benefit. You did it to expand your perfection!

Holeeee shit! It’s all as holeee as its ever gonna be, right now, as you and I go exploring more and more.

The more that you come to know will never be topped by the more you already are.

How’s that for real adventure?
Raphael Awen is co-creator, teacher, and facilitator of the SoulFullHeart Way Of Life. Check out our programs: FREE, PREP and DEEP, for a new and profound going-on place in your spiritual and emotional journey at www.soulfullheartwayoflife.com/sessions.

Return LOVE in money form: https://www.paypal.me/supportsoulfullheart or visit our Patreon page to become a monthly supporter: https://www.patreon.com/soulfullheart.

There Are No Wrong Choices

Published on by Raphael Awen2 Comments

By Raphael Awen

We chose to enter duality, the place of choosing this over that, with a soul awareness that there are/were no wrong choices.

Every choice we make leads to an awareness that we made the choice; that we eventually came to either like it or not; and that we can make a different choice anytime we want, with what remains in our power to choose.

A previous choice may have narrowed the options before us, and a part of us may feel a bunch of regret about a particular choice, but even that pain filled result is a powerful act of a creator being enacted in order to come to terms with its own power. The wrong choice now couldn’t be more right.

The pain caused by the ‘wrong’ choice, and the all the internal reactions of self judgment, shame, regret, anger, etc., all give us a powerful opportunity to get to know and love the part(s) of ourselves who hold those feelings.

If your child returned home from school distraught over having been bullied that day, a healthy parent would open their heart to simply feel that with the child, so they could digest the trauma and move on. So it is we are being invited to feel the parts of us in reaction to this challenging world of duality we find ourselves in. Until the trauma is able to be felt by an open hearted ‘other’, there is no way for the pain to digest, but instead it gets compartmentalized away to go on to create more similar trauma for us to eventually show up for as the healthy parent ‘other’ to feel. In this way again, all the wrong choices lead to the right choices.

The right choice is simply the willingness to feel what we were up till that point unwilling or unable to feel. The whole point of all the drama of our lives, like any story, movie, or novel is that life essentially is about creating feeling. It can also be seen that all karmic play outs in our lives are not about punishment, but rather about re-creations of feeling scenarios, that we came here to feel.

It seems that if life in this dimension is anything, it is constantly about choosing some thing over another thing. We can avoid a particular choice, but no-choice is always very much a choice. Even in that, we are ‘event’ually brought to feeling the part of us afraid to choose, along with their sacred whats and whys.

These are the moments of total redemption. These are the moments of totally getting the whole point of all the dramas and their play outs. These are the moments of coming home to yourself.

Raphael Awen is co-creator, teacher, and facilitator of the SoulFullHeart Way Of Life. Check out our programs: FREE, PREP and DEEP, for a new and profound going-on place in your spiritual and emotional journey at www.soulfullheartwayoflife.com/sessions.

Return LOVE in money form: https://www.paypal.me/supportsoulfullheart or visit our Patreon page to become a monthly supporter: https://www.patreon.com/soulfullheart.

 

Embrace Your Humanity As You Embody Your Divinity

Published on by Raianna Shai1 Comment

By Raianna Shai

“Embrace Your Humanity As You Embody Your Divinity”

I feel a new understanding and connection to this new SoulFullHeart tagline after a recent process I experienced. I can feel how spirituality and humanity can feel so separate, like one can only exist without the other. Parts can feel like spirituality is only attainable if we leave behind our humanity, our reactions, our desires and fears. And in another way, it can feel impossible to really feel our spirituality in a way that shows up in our daily lives.

It’s easy to feel connected to the Divine while meditating in nature. But what about in relationships with people that trigger reactions? Do we transcend those reactions in attempt to get back to how we felt in nature?

The importance and beauty of both our human experience and our connection to the higher frequencies of the Divine are becoming more and more clear to me now. Our humanity is not bad or wrong, it’s what we’ve chosen to be in all of its hardship and glory. We can raise our frequency to that of angels, but we are still anchored to Gaia. Our frustrations will still be there, as will the parts of us that feel those frustrations.

I feel an overall compassion for the parts of us that are made out to be bad because of the existence of their emotions. Instead of feeling them and what lies beneath the surface, we try so hard to ignore and even bury them. Underneath anything low frequency is fear and pain that just needs to be felt and advocated for. I actually don’t feel anything as truly low frequency at its core. It just shows itself that way as a protection of the vulnerable feelings underneath. We can leave these feelings the way they are and try to go on without them, or we can transmute them to something beautiful and take them along with us. I find it hard to feel whole without them.

This has connected to my own process in a different way. I feel comfortable with most emotions and I’ve felt more of a desire to actually feel them than some others. But what I have never felt resonant with is spiritual seeking. I understand the desire to feel what else there is and what we’re meant for, but I’ve never had the motivation to digest different spiritual modalities. Luckily, my family is the heart core of SoulFullHeart and has given me a process to let in and feel as my own.

But at this point in my process I am feeling the resistance towards the more spiritual. My fears lie in the concern of feeling less connected to others, of being resonant with less people and parts of me feeling lonelier because of it, of not being considered “normal” anymore by the majority of people, of potentially hurting those that I no longer resonate with when I complete those connections. A lot of fear resides in the opinions of others for parts of me and in that, my own process and importance takes second place.

Going back to the phrase “Embrace Your Humanity As You Embody Your Divinity”, I feel the message for me is how spirituality can enrich your daily life. It gives you the worth and the trust to let go of what no longer serves you. It’s not about leaving anyone or anything behind, but about embracing and feeling the fear to do so. I know that I’ve never been drawn to the life that 3D society maps out for humans to follow, but truly embodying my spirituality and divinity is a new step for me that may lead to uncharted territory this life.

I am feeling all of the fears that come up along the way as well as all the joy and magic that my discoveries may bring me. My parts are trusting the Divine more and more as a container for my experiences, even the painful ones. And my more independent parts are starting to feel the benefits of leaning into others so they don’t have to go it alone. Ascension is different for every soul, and I’m looking forward to feeling how my own plays out.

Raianna Shai is a SoulFullHeart facilitant and social media maven for SoulFullHeart Way Of Life. Visit  www.soulfullheartwayoflife.com for more information about sessions, group calls, videos, community, retreats, etc. Return LOVE in money form: https://www.paypal.me/supportsoulfullheart or visit our Patreon page to become a monthly supporter: https://www.patreon.com/soulfullheart.

Moving From Energy Of “Against” Yourself to “With” Yourself

Published on by Jelelle AwenLeave a comment

By Jelelle Awen
Energy ‘against’ anything INside of you just continues a cycle of inner torn-ness, self punishment, rejection, loss, confusion, suffering, inadequacy and insecurity, self doubt. Energies that offer for you to be against your ego or against your mind or against your body (sometimes supported even by unfelt self punishment frequencies in spiritual offerings) feed these inner cycles of suffering.

This against energy then draws toxic and unhealthy cycles that play out in life….in abusive relationships, in money struggles, in physical body injuries/struggles/illness, in emotional suffering, in capped spiritual growth. These outside circumstances are a reflection of the inner ‘against-ness’. They are a mirror for you to see and feel how this pattern is happening and where it comes from, where it sources from inside of parts of you.

When you bring love, when you bring ‘with’ energy to ALL aspects of yourself, the ‘against’ frequencies start to heal. They start to soften. They start to rest. They start to draw LOVING energies to your life that show up in nourishing relationships, capacity to be with pain yet not suffer, in a vibrant and healthy body, in financial abundance (whatever that means to you.)

YOU can bring this love as you embody more of your Divine Self that becomes a loving observer and witness and spaceholder to parts of you that are in the dark, in pain, in shadow, in ‘control’ (or want to be) and are stuck in the suffering cycles. You become able to identify, feel, and heal the INNER polarization of your feminine and masculine (for women and men) that draws these stuck relationships.

You become the spaceholder and matchmaker for a beautiful and touching sacred union within that deepens into WITHNESS as it moves out of AGAINSTNESS. As ALL parts of you then start to move out of fear and into love….

~

Jelelle Awen is Co-creator/Facilitator/Teacher of the SoulFullHeart Way Of Life. She is a Soul Scribe and author of three books about Ascension. Visit soulfullheartwayoflife.com for more information about our NEW SoulFullHeart process programs, group calls, videos, etc. Visit our patreon page to offer a monthly or one time money donation to support our offerings at https://www.patreon.com/soulfullheart.

The Next Moment Is A Blank Slate

Published on by Raphael Awen4 Comments

By Raphael Awen

Today, like any next moment, is a blank slate.

There is the momentum of your beliefs and values rolling like a train down a well worn track inside of you, held in place by parts of you, that will fill that blank slate if you allow it to, but prior to any moment, the next moment, in its essence is always a blank slate.

Because we are so accustomed to every arising moment being spoken for by this massive freight train of our beliefs and feelings and its seemingly unstoppable inertia, we lose sight of the blank slate and its potential, accepting instead the all-too-familiar manhandling of these agents of some bureaucratic moment-killing agency; in this case, the very beliefs and values that we adopted along the way in the name of fitting in.

Life from then on becomes largely a ‘just what is’ kind of reality that we have long ago simply accepted, forgotten, having long moved on now to seeing how we can best tolerate the leftovers, of what actually amounts to a devastation on an epic scale in our consciousness.

The Now has become simply an extension of the past, protruding into the future, with you and I sitting rather uncomfortably faced with our present.

Reverence and wonder is sacrificed to paying homage daily to a despised, but nonetheless revered god of normalcy. No longer are we the creators, but now we are turned to the need to make life one big pharmacy dispensing machine, giving out one medication after another to cover over this pain of the loss of our true creative power. All of life then at root becomes about assuaging this very real, but well hidden pain of this loss, while we are mostly too medicated to even see this layer of reality.

We lost the moment. We lost our power. We simply give it away every single moment of every single day, until something awakens in us.

I find I can write passionately about this truth, crafting words to attempt to drive home my point, but truth be told, the more I feel the reality I just described, the less I feel like any master over it. I awaken to thumb away here on my iPad to reach for a drink from my own well, from my own Higher Self, to receive an awareness altering message in order to face my own inner freight train of my preconstructed looking glass. The very next moment is right there before me, virgin, without guile, and yet wanting to play in whatever innocence we can feel together, yet there is also the very real threat of the moment being seized, by ‘the agency’, like the last one and the one before that.

Near as I am able to now tell, having wrestled with this false god for some time, in a variety of spiritual settings, there actually isn’t anything to master here, or to overcome. What I have actually discovered is that the attempt to master some life altering spirituality in the name of overcoming an unwanted limiting pattern and predisposition is actually to strengthen, rather than diminish its reality inside of us. What we resist persists.

Instead, I am invited to assume my Higher Self’s position and feel the parts of me who hold these limiting beliefs and values that they cling to. Here, I discover very beautiful reasons they hold for clinging to old patterns so tenaciously. Only as I feel these parts of me and their sacred ‘why’s’ for feeling what they do, and why they energize the barriers to the moment that they do am I afforded any real shifts in my life. Only as the parts of me that live inside of me find new values and beliefs that they adopt of their own free will and sovereignty, am I actually afforded any lightening or shortening of the moment-crashing freight train inside of me.

I am invited to turn the passion of the ‘fight to overcome’ into a heart campaign to claim the previously unknown and unwanted parts of myself. My passion will still surely be called upon, but with a whole new set of values and beliefs to guide them. The warrior within will still have plenty of territory to express and transform, albeit inside of a letting-in reality, over a keeping-out reality.

I get the dawning awareness that this may well keep me busy the rest of this life, that this actually is what life is, to bring awareness to every moment in this way. If I did succeed to the point of no longer needing this practice, I may well have lost the whole point of being here, which is to keep letting in the love that I am. Quite possibly, the best place to gain the most traction and momentum in living my way into this new reality is from right here on Gaia.

I mean, if it were not so, wouldn’t you and I be somewhere else, doing something different with our sacred power?

Read more about enculturating a new way of life inside of you at:soulfullheartwayoflife.com/sessions. We would love to have your inquiry into SoulFullHeart’s new program offerings ‘FREE, PREP and DEEP’.
Raphael Awen is co-creator, teacher, and facilitator of the SoulFullHeart Way Of Life. Check out our programs: FREE, PREP and DEEP, for a new and profound going-on place in your spiritual and emotional journey at www.soulfullheartwayoflife.com/sessions.

Return LOVE in money form: https://www.paypal.me/supportsoulfullheart or visit our Patreon page to become a monthly supporter: https://www.patreon.com/soulfullheart.

SoulFullHeart Patreon Money UPdate February 2018

Published on by Raphael AwenLeave a comment

By Raphael Awen

Wow, what a ride February has proven to be, with a ton of change!

We went from having eleven facilitants in SoulFullHeart, and climbing, to having only three (at the moment)!

A big piece of that reduction was actually about us no longer being comfortable to serve people with our weekly sessions program who we didn’t really feel wanted the process on the level we are offering it and who were more drawn instead to having a regular therapy kind of holding. It’s nice to be wanted, and even to be seen as unique, and to have people willing to give you money for services, but we also need to feel that what we are serving is firing on enough cylinders to make it engaging and rewarding for ourselves as well as the facilitant, and in alignment with the SoulFullHeart picture.

All of this made for a narrower money picture as well as a back-to-the-drawing-board turn for us, as our recent modest, but treasured surplus monthly cash position had turned into a near shortfall.

This led us back to the thought of developing more of a self-led, self guided process within SoulFullHeart’s offerings to serve interested people for a much smaller minimum monthly donation that involved assignments, group online calls and a members-only private forum for process interaction and sharing. This also felt like the perfect solution for people who need or want more time and space to acclimate to SoulFullHeart energies at their own pace and proximation without it involving the focus and momentum of weekly one-on-one session space.

This led to a re-creation of our entire offering into three separate programs what we now call ‘Free, Prep and Deep’, with Prep being this new self-led program and the weekly sessions program being the Deep program, that now has several refinements and value adds as well.

If this experiment ends up being viable financially for us, with each new Prep and Deep member helping us plant the SoulFullHeart way of life into consciousness, our narrower money picture could well become a sweet memory of our ‘garage days’.

We set out a few months back to ‘transparentize’ our world of money, feeling this intention to be be central to wanting to plant a new way of life in the world. Glastonbury (Our UK in May plan) remains very much in our focus and desire for this year, and feels like our next big project undertaking as well as our next fundraising. We will be sharing more about it soon.

Here is the Money UPdate for February, 2018:

(all figures in US Dollars)

$2,218 – Gabriel and Kalayna’s English Teaching through VIPkid.

$1,129 – Donations for Sessions.

$64 – Group Call Donations for our one Group Call this month.

$37 – Book Sales

$36 – General Donations – People just sending money!

$3,484 – TOTAL Revenue for January. – that’s about $700 a person!

A very special thank you to those who are a part of weekly SoulFullHeart session space, as well as to our precious Patreons.

More about our Programs here: http://www.soulfullheartwayoflife.com/sessions

From myself, Jelelle Awen , Kalayna Colibri , Gabriel Heartman , andRaianna Shai , as well as from some near and dear souls presently deepening with us, THANK YOU, for your love, for your support, and for showing us your love in the form of money. 

Raphael Awen is co-creator, teacher, and facilitator of the SoulFullHeart Way Of Life. Check out our programs: FREE, PREP and DEEP, for a new and profound going-on place in your spiritual and emotional journey at www.soulfullheartwayoflife.com/sessions.

Return LOVE in money form: https://www.paypal.me/supportsoulfullheart or visit our Patreon page to become a monthly supporter: https://www.patreon.com/soulfullheart.

Day 6 ~ Journal To The Demiurge

Published on by Raphael AwenLeave a comment

Journal To The Demiurge with Raphael Awen Day 6

By Raphael Awen

(This is Day 6 of an ongoing series, to begin at day 1, go here: https://goo.gl/CgrWXZ)

Raphael: Hello again, Wow, Day 6 all. Upward and onward to the Demiurge, Shall we?

Metatron: We shall.

Raphael: Any check ins, anyone?

Jim: I’ll go.

Raphael: Perfect.

Jim: I was listening and taking in deeply the sharing of your story, Raphael, over the last few days. At times, I was just so overcome with a deep sadness for what I wasn’t able to begin to see or feel with you as it was happening, as you were growing up, or entering adulthood, while I was the one you called ‘dad’. I can so feel now how your draw to the Demiurge came in as a placeholder for what you and I couldn’t find together, and for what your heart needed. I need to say again how deep that sorrow feeling goes. I am so, so sorry, Raphael. You deserved more, and I so short changed myself as well with what I could have known and experienced with you.

Raphael: Thank you, Jim. That goes in, again. Must still be some pieces for us to feel there together. Infinite healing, I guess we could call it. Aside from any labels though, I feel the genuine heart chord you are vibrating at right now and it feels so good. Marvin gets now that I chose all of this on a soul level, but it still touches deeply the wounds felt in 3D. And it opens the heart more too, to feel any and all remorse as often as it comes up, till it’s done, if it’s ever done.

Jim: When I grow up, I want to be like you, Raphael. Thank you everyone for feeling me this morning. I hope I’m not too much, it’s just a bit of a task helping out from the other side.

Raphael: You are never too much, Jim. I’m glad you checked in. Who else is feeling something?

Rhodes: I’m feeling something…

Raphael: Please, Rhodes…

Rhodes: I guess… I’ll just recap what we felt together earlier today, Raphael?

Raphael: I know I’d love to hear it in your words, Rhodes, and it feels so important to this journey we are all undertaking. And to those still catching up with our story, Rhodes is my personal Gatekeeper, who resonates at a much higher frequency than 3D, and holds access to other dimensions. We all have one, or more maybe, and I’m very glad to have Rhodes!

Rhodes: Okay, so, yesterday, what was really coming up for me was a despair, of not feeling that excited about the next evolution in Raphael’s life. This was hard to admit, and I don’t think I’ve ever really let myself feel that before. Anything to try and stay positive. I wasn’t able to hide that feeling though this morning as it got really pushed up while Raphael shared about his journey this life. I can call it ‘his’ journey now, but that’s another recent development too. It has felt like my journey for as long as I can remember up till recently. As I was saying, this despair came up strong and Raphael asked me to just feel it together. I was able to feel, and to even admit that the next big discovery, or realization, which I’ve always been attached to in the past, just felt aimless to me now.

I know we have a God hunger, or a divine hunger, I should call it, that still lives inside, well on the other side of the Demiurge variety that is so much more alive, and so much more meaningful, but I just wasn’t into it somehow. I couldn’t quite feel why, when Raphael said, ‘Maybe, being with me in the way you have been isn’t where or how you’re supposed to be?’. He meant that I’m to be vibrating at a higher, more native frequency, not so invested this intensely in what’s happening or not happening in Raphael’s life. I just let out a great big bunch of heartache tears about then. I’ve been a bit jealous feeling Wayne and Andy take up residence in Golden Earth, coming back and forth as they please, and I know I’m meant to be there and beyond too. It landed in me that there has been a big mission accomplished here that I couldn’t see.

I hope I’m not taking up too much space with all this.

Raphael: We can take up the next four years with this, if we want to Rhodes. The Demiurge has been around a long time and isn’t going anywhere. And what we feel and heal together rumbles all the way, even to the big old pain the Demiurge is carrying around.

Rhodes: That feels good to feel…

Raphael: Actually,.. or maybe I should ask Metatron for input here, instead of trying to channel him. Metatron?

Metatron: Actually…, I was feeling a rumble, Raphael, and Rhodes, what an epic movement and celebration, wow! This is the real deal. This is the quantum healing we’ve been waiting for. My goodness, so many directions to go in at once. Let me take a moment….

The Demiurge has been born of consciousness, as were all of us, you, me, each and every part of us going through an awakening process, being re-membered back to love as you like to say Raphael. Before the awakening and remembering though was a separation, or what felt like a separation, an unavoidable soul birth trauma as Divine allness or oneness became two. All fear has its roots in this experience of what could only be felt at the time as separation from the Divine. All the world’s religions and every spirituality to this day exist in an attempt to address these fears one way or the other, some legitimately, many questionably.

Consciousness expanded itself into duality, from oneness into twoness. Prior to that, there was no such thing as ‘other’. What we are learning now however, and taking all the time we need to in that learning, is that though we were given individuality, or as we were ‘otherized’ into existence, you could say, there still is nothing that is ‘other’ to the divine. Not even the Demiurge for that matter. There is only that which is still awakening to the oneness that was retained in the separation. It’s separation without losing oneness if you can grok that somehow.

Okay, I’m going a bit ‘meta’ here I realize, but that’s my name, Meta-tron. Rhodes, how’s this landing in you? Is it bridging to what you are feeling?

Rhodes: It does, Metatron, on a high level bridging for sure. As I dial it down a few levels, I feel how all of our life dramas are connected to this soul birth trauma as you are calling it, as well as the subsequent awakening and remembering processes. I’ve already been able to feel some pretty big aches in the Metasoul that were bleeding into my reality, and I’m feeling that some of this despair is about wanting to be in my native frequency as I said, but other pieces of it are about unfelt despair in some of my and Raphael’s Metasoul brothers too. It’s going to get interesting feeling and distinguishing all that. So, the situation report for the moment is that I don’t think I am, or necessarily need to be as disinterested in Raphael’s life as I said I was feeling, AND, I still want to spread my wings to much more of my multidimensionality going forward.

Raphael: I’m feeling you have a perspective on all this Merlin…

Merlin: I do, a really nice warm and fuzzy one, that has enough clarity for my liking at the same time. I’m feeling this process for you, Rhodes, is perfectly on time with the journey at hand.

The Demiurge long ago took to reigning in these lower dimensions, but it so doesn’t feel like he is having fun doing it, or that he is in his native frequency being here. I mean, beings that are having fun don’t need that much control, or duty and obligation to keep their deal afloat. It’s so obvious that we are dealing with an unhappy camper who doesn’t know anything different, but wants to, possibly,… at least, I’m hoping that ‘want to’ is dawning on him; that a new deal is possible and his own deeper desires are coming into his awareness. If that’s true, then your awakening, Rhodes, mirrors his, and is just what’s wanting to move through consciousness now.

Raphael: Wow, like even the Demiurge is going through an Ascension process…?

Merlin: …like even the Demiurge is ascending, yes, or being offered Ascension is actually more accurate. Nothing happens outside of free will, but the window for it is ripening big time.

Raphael: Then, I’m feeling how we can’t offer anything that we aren’t deeply experiencing ourselves.

Merlin: Bingo! And if we are picking up on the bigger rumble, that the Demiurge is getting close to being done with his Heavenly Father persona, that’s the only way this ambassadorship will achieve anything. Timing is everything as they say, for us to approach him while we are in possession of something he longs for. Ambassadorships work through beneficial mutual exchange. We can only expect to gain audience with him if we possess something he wants. Your journey, Rhodes, is an excellent example of coming free, breaking ancient chains, smelling very fresh air, outside the prison doors, overlooking the beautiful inviting valley.

Raphael: Okay, well that expands the picture here again this morning. We’re inviting the Demiurge out of his prison for the first time…. Holeeee!

I know this is all pure blasphemy of the highest order to those still under the Demiurge’s reign, but hopefully, we won’t encounter too much of their resistance. We can just quietly sneak up, unlock their prison doors too, and split. Let them figure it out when they’re ready and we don’t take any buckshot in the process.

I think all this could use some settling and baking time inside all of us, and assuming the Demiurge has us on speed dial now, and is listening and up to speed with everything we’re up to, then I’ll bet, he could use a bit of acclimation time too, right?

Andy: So let’s take out the Merkabah for a Galactic spin then. There’s some galaxies we could visit that are not too far out of our own solar system. There’s major cool stuff there, and no Demiurge.

Raphael: Andy, we so need all that and more, but I’m wondering how that could jive with me taking the time to share more today of our this-life, this-dimension story in Christianity?  

Andy: Okay, How about if we all pile into the Merkabah and I can dial up some scenery then as we do?

Raphael: Sounds Perfect, Andy. I know I can use some higher Starseed frequencies to help going back to reliving some of this stuff. I’ll bet there still is some undigested pieces to feel, or I wouldn’t be drawn to retell the story.

Where was I?

Jim: You said that wasn’t the end of the airport coincidences that day in the airport.

Raphael: Right, let me launch back in there then.

So, Mar-yam and I and our two daughters are making our way across the Pacific at 35,000 feet digesting this wild coincidence, or in our books, a miracle, that happened just before boarding. I didn’t know the word ‘synchronicity’ at the time, or relate to them the way I do now. It gave us a warm feeling to digest an obvious ‘supernatural’ sign of God’s blessing or approval on the mission ahead, and on ourselves if we could feel it as that.

We landed for our short stopover in Tokyo, where we have to switch planes. Seats are in short supply when we check in, so I end up sitting one row ahead with Mar-yam and the girls just behind me on this final leg with a four or five hour flight into Manila.

My desired window seat is a great place to be alone with my thoughts and feel a whole dimension of something that I so rarely get to feel, so I settle into my own cocoon. As the flight begins its descent into Manila, the people on board naturally begin to stir, and I make a motion to greet my seat mate for the first time on my left, a middle-aged Asian man. We did the usual by asking where each other was headed after landing in the capital. I again recited the name of the province we were very soon to be headed by bus. He smiles and says, ‘Oh, that’s where my family is from, but we live in Manila now.’ He of course asks, ‘What city?’, I tell him, and his smile grows wider, he responds, ‘That’s where my family is from.’ I don’t know if I could take this anymore at this point, and luckily, he didn’t personally know of the Pastor I was going to visit, but he did know the family name.

Wow, I was just digesting one coincidence and got another one stacked on top of it. The question of ‘what are the chances…?’ didn’t even enter my mind as I so felt this was outside of the realm of mere chance. It was a personal confirmation of God being in this.

We landed and crowded our way off the plane as I shared this story with Mar-yam, without much time to digest it, making our way through the luggage and customs gauntlet. If I didn’t get the message with the first coincidence, I was given another to make sure I got it. I did get the message, yet I struggled to know what it’s deeper meanings might be.

Within a day of arriving, after another long ride, this one by bus, we met with Marben and Amy, the Pastor couple, along with their family and very welcoming congregation.

Given their esteem for us; along with all of our cultural and logistical bridging needs in a very foreign country; in an out-of-the-way town; our daily travels etc.; we formed a tight knit feeling of bond and community together that we all hoped would naturally extend well into the future with many comings and goings between us as well as our churches.

A few days after arriving, I did meet Marben’s brother and gave him the note I had for him from the Filipino man I had sat beside while boarding in Seattle. He smiled lightly at the coincidence, and simply read the note and stuck it in his shirt pocket. I recall feeling a bit disappointed that it wasn’t somehow anything more significant, or supernatural.

One day, I recall disappointing Marben badly by wearing my overseas footwear of choice; flip flops; while setting out to speak with a large group at a city wide gathering. We found our way through the cultural differences sufficiently to grow deeper and deeper over the short period of time, with a mostly natural ease.

Nearing the end of our time together however, a troubling growing awareness of some huge disintegrities arose that Marben seemed to be keeping well under wraps. It appeared that he was involved sexually somehow with the pretty and vulnerable Bible School students that the church led; that he was also not detached from the local communist party like he claimed he was; and also that church finances were going sideways off the books.

The other leaders from our church group had left a week earlier and had chickened out from addressing any of this, hoping I would surrender to the usual default same face-saving charade and just ‘cool off Marben’s way’ after a ‘nice’ church send-off service. Voila.

I knew all that Marben and we had talked about in regards to ongoing deeper involvement and being overseas ‘sister churches’ was off the table. There was no way we could go home and support any of that now, with what we suspected.

What I couldn’t bring myself to do though was to play the charade card. I knew an extra special send-off service was planned for us the following weekend and so the pressure to keep nice was about as strong as it could get.

The next day, when Marben dropped by as usual, I found my courage and told him about the 3 questions about him that had arose, which left unresolved would hinder all that we had hoped to share together going forward. I made it as easy as possible on myself and rolled it all into one sentence. He let me finish, pierced his eyes like daggers along with his forefinger and said, ‘That’s right, you don’t know’, and headed for the door. Our next time to see him was him smiling warmly as usual for the send off service where the locals piled us high with flowers and even received a love offering to help send us on our way.  

The last thing I did before boarding the return flight home was to find a mailbox in the airport to mail him a letter I wrote him confirming that we would not be continuing with any of the plans we had made until when and if things got resolved.

It was a tough one to digest going from feeling all of this ‘supernatural confirmation from God’ through the coincidences at the outset of this trip to this kind of a death on the way out the door.

Returning back home to our church, the fellow Elders and Pastor weren’t interested in debriefing any of this in any kind of a relational way as it was just an embarrassment, and ‘a bit of spiritual warfare to put behind us’ so the real work of God could go on unhindered.

The again default pattern of not facing and feeling real relational issues inside of our personal and leadership relationships was reaching a boiling point in me. Mar-yam and I had lamented it ongoingly now for years. I knew I wasn’t about to rip anyone’s head off, but I sure as hell couldn’t remain in this kind of a charade forever.

I sadly gave myself to the finding and diving into the next painting contract. In the world of contracting, we made a promise and kept it, and that somehow felt like a balm of integrity in the face of the game playing we did in church, that more and more and more, I was on the edge of losing my stomach for. I wasn’t aware of any misgivings towards God, but we, as his people, were sure a sad pathetic sight is how I felt about it at the time.

Metatron: Wow, Raphael, what a universe!

Raphael: I know, huh. It’s like I’m right back there at the moment, feeling myself as Marvin so looking for a way through the jungle, while being afraid to feel how much of a jungle it was at the same time. What do you make of it all, Metatron?

Metatron: I get it, Raphael. As being part of the church, you were all fired up to take God’s truth to the far flung places on the planet. You had thee instruction guide for meaningful relationships, and this was the best you were able to come up with. That has got to be maddening.

Raphael: That was maddening for sure. But what was even more maddening was the unwillingness to admit any of it. Truth was, and this took me some more years inside of all this to feel, is that there was a lot inside of myself I wasn’t willing to face, that I needed to keep hidden. It wasn’t as glaringly obvious as chasing women, or dipping into church finances, but it was stuff I was subconsciously very geared to not feel or face.

Part of me was using God and the hopeful focus of really making my life ‘count for God’ as a way to not feel what this part of me so wanted to escape feeling, believing that feeling that would be the end of me. At the time however, I couldn’t feel any of that hidden subconscious stuff. I could however feel very clearly that the key to finding our way through the jungle was to get real, to get real with each other, to get real with God, with whatever we could feel as real.

The admission I made in the elders circle, and resignation letter that I mentioned last day, came within months of returning home from this trip. I needed to take my own medicine and get real with myself. Mar-yam and I soon left our beloved all-in church behind, and went on to join one where we had no knowledge of the inner workings. I simply didn’t want to know, and feared that if I did, I wouldn’t be able to hang out there either.

I see now, that it was at this point that my belief and intense focus on the Bible as ‘thee deal’ lightened some, even if I couldn’t admit that either at the time. I opened myself back up to non-Christian music and reading, which I had been conditioned deeply to feel as backsliding. Who’d have guessed, for instance, that a Mormon, a decidedly deceived person, in our particular staunch Christian mindset that is, like Stephen Covey, could write such a grounded and genuinely helpful book like 7 Habits Of Highly Successful People without threatening hell, or sounding like a street preacher?

I knew two things instinctively at the time. One was that ‘God was for us’ and the other was that ‘He needed us to reach for the help we sought.’ I reached for the self-help aisle in the local bookstores and checked in from time to time to see if any Christian authors in the Christian bookstore had got real in the meantime.

It was a journey from this point over the course of the next 14 years, of slowly, but surely, thinning out one ‘pillar of the faith’ after the other. I did come across a small group claiming to still be true Christians, but had dispensed with many of the popular Evangelical claims, teaching a very alternative message. I dove deeply into two particular teachers in that movement for a good while. Mar-yam found it a breath of such fresh air as well, and we were even surprised to find two couples in our circle of long standing friends that were ready and hungry for a similar shift in focus. It allowed us some personal quiet breathing room, to feel into more of what we believed and why, while not jeopardizing our claim to being Christian, at least to ourselves.

A big one came around the halfway point of that stretch coming to the conclusion, as well as to the admission, the latter being the harder part, that I no longer held the Bible as the ‘inerrant, inspired, God-breathed, Word of God’. My intuition was pinging on all cylinders telling me that the only point of an ‘inerrant book’ was simply control, and that any ‘God’ out for control, was no ‘God’ at all. I had to adjust my picture of God and the Bible to a more progressive one in order to continue for the time being and that’s what I did.

This was the point though where Mar-yam became quite uncomfortable with where I was going, realizing that without that conviction, as liberating as it admittedly felt on one level, there also was no guarantee on anything, including our marriage. Our close friends interest in this new message and movement dried up at this time too.

Andy, I’m thinking a break-point is in order soon, can you dial us in an address to park this Merkabah for a bit?

Andy: Got the perfect spot in mind, Raphael. There’s a black hole super portal in our vicinity, and then just a mere 12 million light years from there, so we’re good. I’ll have us with our feet up in no time. Hold tight everyone, you might feel a bump or two.

Raphael: You are thee best, Andy! I’m thinking there’s some more digesting we need to do, but I’m a bit tired from the reliving of all this, and I know there’s more to feel, that I’ll need a nights sleep or two along with Andy’s galactic stay to digest this all, and what we’re fixing to do, from an elevated perspective, we could call it…

Anyone have anything they need to share before we take a pause?

Merlin: Pausing’s good.

Rhodes: I’ll say…

Raphael: Until next day then, everyone. What a day’s Journey this was. Many, many thanks again!
Raphael Awen is co-creator, teacher, and facilitator of the SoulFullHeart Way Of Life. Visit www.soulfullheartwayoflife.com for more information about Weekly Sessions, Live Streams, Videos, and Community.

Return LOVE in money form: https://www.paypal.me/supportsoulfullheart or visit our Patreon page to become a monthly supporter: https://www.patreon.com/soulfullheart.

New Babies Announcement: SoulFullHeart FREE, PREP and DEEP

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By Raphael Awen

We’re having brand new babies and these babies are going to take a beloved community to raise them!

We are launching our new PREP program this week and this has necessitated a transformation and naming of our other two previously nameless babies that we’ve had up till now, as FREE and DEEP.

Our new program offerings are now called, FREE, PREP and DEEP.

We’re so excited we can hardly stand it!

FREE is free, a ton of fresh-baked goodies that we send out almost every day through a host of channels, creating virtual cafes and libraries for you to find your way in. In FREE, you can acclimate to and take in the signature SoulFullHeart energies that we feel you can’t find anywhere else. You can create a lot of movement and shifts in your life just by taking in these free offerings and allowing them to move through you and your view of life and relationships. FREE is actually at the heart of what we offer and we put so much into it, because we want to, and because it’s our funnest fun.

PREP is the next level of significant engagement. For $77 USD minimum donation per month, you can become a PREP member. In PREP, you will receive three weekly SoulFullHeart Process program assignments each month tailored to getting to know and feel aspects of yourself in alignment with your Ascension journey. There are also three facilitated and recorded group calls every month that you can join in live or take in afterwards, at your leisure, with other PREP and DEEP members, to have space to process what you are digesting. Another BIG support structure is the SoulFullHeart Circle, a members-only private forum to share your assignments, digestions, and form new relationships based in the SoulFullHeart way of life. With this expanded engagement of your intentionality along with the weekly process assignments, the group calls, and the Circle, you will be able to make much deeper and grounded life changes that your heart and soul have been wanting to make, with all of that based in getting to know and feel parts of yourself, rather than a self-help regimen overlay of what you ‘should’ do.

In PREP, for an additional minimum donation of $55 USD, you can also schedule a 75 to 90 minute personal session with one of the SoulFullHeart facilitators as you feel the need for specific digestions.

PREP is a self-guided program where you have a ton of resources to choose from that you can engage with at your own pace and allow life to flow with you and your discoveries and shifts.

The details for PREP along with a ‘Buy Now’ button can be found here. If you are ready, you can sign up immediately. All you need to do is make the minimum donation (or more) and we’ll send you our welcome letter and get you oriented. No commitment beyond the month is required.

Then comes DEEP for a minimum monthly donation of $222 USD a month. You can dive in here if you want to, but you may not want to. Depends. We’ll meet with you first to discuss what you are looking for and how we and the DEEP program could serve you. DEEP includes all of the PREP program, as well as the FREE program, which form the foundations for the DEEP program.

What DEEP offers beyond this foundation is going through the same weekly assignments that are offered in PREP, but along with having a recurring weekly personal session space with one of the program facilitators (Gabriel, Kalayna or Raphael, with Jelelle as a senior facilitator working with women who have completed a minimum of three months in DEEP) too. This is all-in for a minimum donation of $222 USD per month.

As you are using all of the tools and means to support your process of getting to discover, know and love parts of yourself, the sessions provide a space for these parts to come to life. They will feel the light and love of a new day, as you are also templated and guided to be this new, loving, authentic self, and curious parent energy to these parts of yourself. Our wounding occured in a feeling space while in relationship and so does our healing, one beloved part at a time. If you know already that you want to go into DEEP, we want to meet with you in a Program Advisory Session led by myself (Raphael) to get you oriented and grounded. If I really feel you would be better served by PREP, we will talk about that together as well. We ask for a minimum donation of $33 USD for this one hour Program Advisory Session. Go here if you’d like to purchase that and I will be in touch to set that up with you.

The details for DEEP can be found here. Information about the brand NEW SoulFullHeart Process can be found here.

We believe this stuff down to our core. We walk what we talk and we live it everyday. Serving it to others is an extension of that. We believe with all of our hearts that you will not find anything like it anywhere. We’ve looked high and low. That’s a bold claim, I know, but how is it that any lesser claim could be enough for you?

If this resonates for you, please join us and become a part of the community that it’s going to take for the raising of these new babies – SoulFullHeart FREE, PREP and DEEP.

We will be more than delighted for each and every one of you that desire to be a part of this and what the road ahead calls us, all together, to show up for.

In Heart,

Raphael Awen, on behalf of all of us here in SoulFullHeart.
Raphael Awen is co-creator, teacher, and facilitator of the SoulFullHeart Way Of Life. Visit www.soulfullheartwayoflife.com for more information about Weekly Sessions, Live Streams, Videos, and Community.

Return LOVE in money form: https://www.paypal.me/supportsoulfullheart or visit our Patreon page to become a monthly supporter: https://www.patreon.com/soulfullheart.

Belief Systems Anonymous

Published on by Raphael Awen2 Comments

By Raphael Awen

Life is relating to all of me, and I in turn am relating to all of life.

It’s happening in the background with or without my awareness. I may be thinking about something pressing, but while I’m given to that awareness, a million other potential concerns are moving along effortlessly.

This is such a bizarre reality for each of us, so much so, that we screen it out and normalize it into everyday waking reality. We toss around the ‘hey, how are you’ greeting out of need to do something with the reality that an I and a you coexist somehow together. But behind our polite or impolite interface with life, is this awesome awe that none of us really knows what to do with. We look and we can only sustain contact for brief moments, and we must turn away, for the fear of the awesomeness that will most surely consume us, leave us no more. But, make no mistake, each of us feels this awesomeness and lives in total fear of it, on a deeper level.

This addresses why we form looking glasses and belief systems with which to look at life, for to look without a looking glass would surely be to die. Even everything I just said above and will go on to say is being produced and filtered by my current belief system.

You cannot live without suitable clothing and unprepared in a harsh cold climate and so it is in this harsh climate of duality that we live in everyday. We must choose one thing over the other and then busy ourselves in that pursuit. Our looking glass is what provides the data to interpret what really matters and what doesn’t. Who’d want to be without that? What would be left in life without that?

Feel for a moment the You who doesn’t know life outside of its looking glass. Feel the myriad of different looking glasses that people choose, how different and opposing they are to one another. Feel how defensive we are about our looking glass being challenged. Then feel in this myriad of difference, the commonality of the fact that we all cling to the need to have a belief system.

We should all check into Belief Systems Anonymous. ‘Hi, my name is Raphael and I’m a looking-glassaholic. I’ve been sober for going on thirteen years and while I still use my looking glass everyday, my sobriety is found in my acknowledgement of that. Prior to being sober, I couldn’t admit or take responsibility for my looking glass. So many were the problems of this fusion to my belief system, so many the judgments of myself and others, which led me deeper and deeper into a form of OCD so insidious, for the simple fact that everyone around me were also unrepentant looking glassaholics. My sober years are opening me more and more, with awareness and admission, to more and more glances of unfiltered reality, to the infinity of love that I can’t begin to describe, but my feelers feel it, and I am overcome with tears. These kinds of nervous breakdowns are the best. I need one quite often just to be able to go on. I need to tell you who I am and what my challenges have been and are before I can feel sane attempting to relate to you any further. Thank you for listening to my story.’

Where is life asking you to feel the edges of your belief system now? What parts of you hold different and even often opposing belief systems inside of you? How is life’s relationship with you wanting to change and shift into new ground of your ongoing awakening into the deeper infinite love that you actually are!

Raphael Awen
Soulfullheartwayoflife.com/sessions

There’s a ton of new creativity brewing in our latest program offerings, FREE, PREP, and DEEP. Check them out at the link above.

Raphael Awen is co-creator, teacher, and facilitator of the SoulFullHeart Way Of Life. Visit  www.soulfullheartwayoflife.com for more information about Weekly Sessions, Live Streams, Videos, and Community.

Return LOVE in money form: https://www.paypal.me/supportsoulfullheart or visit our Patreon page to become a monthly supporter: https://www.patreon.com/soulfullheart.