Digesting Post Traumatic Reactions Stored In The Emotional Body

By Jelelle Awen
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Yesterday, while Raphael and I were out sitting at a cafe, I thought I saw a woman from my past. In the immediate sense that this MIGHT be her, I felt a knot of anxiety and tension in my third chakra or solar plexus area flare up. After confirming with Raphael that it wasn’t this woman, who I will call “Jane”, I felt the tension move out my field replaced by a sense of calm and love.
 
In digesting my response to seeing who I thought was Jane, I gave my solar plexus some loving energy as I felt into what the reaction had been. Jane was once a very close friend of mine, true soul family and sister. Almost ten years ago, we were both part of a spiritual and emotional healing group for close to five years together. The same group for which Raphael and I met and eventually left together. I left the group in a highly intense way, after receiving a choice from Daniel – the leader of the group and a man who was like my surrogate father – to either break up with Raphael for a year or leave the group as we were deemed too codependent to be together in a healthy way. This choice was given to me after only three weeks of dating and years of me being in the group within the inner circle and serving as a facilitator of the work for a few years too.
 
It was a very difficult decision on one end yet, also, my soul was guiding me that it was time to leave this setting which had brought so much love and healing to my life but for which much of it I had outgrown. I heard a strong “No more” in my head which I feel now was my higher self and my guides. I said ‘no’ to the frequencies of control, power OVER those in the group, the gossiping and competition amongst those in the facilitator circle. I said ‘yes’ to my own sovereignty and my choice to explore relationship with Raphael, a man who felt like the deepest mate of heart, soul, and body that I had been desiring for many years. When I left the group, none of the people who I felt to be soul family would or could talk with me any longer.
 
Jane and I were living together at the time of this dissolution with the group and it was very awkward. We tried to have a friendship ‘outside’ of the group, but she was still very much involved and wouldn’t listen to my growing clarities about the shadow frequencies within it. The separation with her and her disapproval of me was so challenging for me to digest when we had experienced so much love together. Eventually, we went our separate ways, with love, and with her choice to continue in the group. We haven’t spoken in over nine years even as the group fell apart two years ago with Daniel finally being called out for his behaviors by all those in the group.
 
I am sharing this story, I believe, because it was interesting to feel how even though consciously I have reconciled this experience, my emotional and energy body still held trauma from it. I connected with this energy in my solar plexus last night (and the nasal congestion that came up too) and also cut any karmic bind cords with Jane and yet sent her love too in case it was the Universe telling me that she was thinking of me. In my experience serving others, this is how our emotional and energy bodies work…they store undigested pain in this way, as pockets that release when they are triggered to release (what Carl Jung called ‘being constellated’). We can trigger them to release through consciously connecting with the part of us that holds this energy as we offer and hold space for in SouLFullHeart.
 
Ultimately, I feel gratitude for my experience in this group and my experience with Jane especially as I trust that our souls signed up for it and it brought me so many gifts of realization around heart-based leadership that invites others into and respects their sovereignty, which is the place I come from related to SoulFullHeart. This group also introduced me to the emotional body, parts work, and the importance of healing at this deep emotional level. Because of the dark night I experienced in leaving the group and ‘losing’ all of my soul family connections that I had at the time, I appreciate the connections that I have with others now in a much deeper way. And, my bond with Raphael was instantly solidified and strengthened by our moving through the trauma of leaving together and we really had no ‘choice’ but to be completely vulnerable with other. This experience also helped me work and heal karmic patterns around rejection, being dominated, dominating others (I connected with my inner Daniel part at some point), shadow side of spirituality, authority, etc.
 
If you find yourself in or are digesting having been in a relationship with some of these frequencies (and this can happen in romantic and family relationships too, usually what is called the empath and narcissist relationship), it takes time to heal and recover from them for sure and much inner strength and soul resolve to complete them. In fact, ‘time’ doesn’t really exist to these places of trauma as it is stored in the emotional body which doesn’t relate to time. The feeling and connecting with these places through negotiation with the protector part that is protecting them can lead to much movement, growth, and healing with lots of self love and care. Held in a container of love, the lessons are integrated and the tensions are moved with much transformation and deeper embodiment of the higher self.
 
We can offer support to those of you going through this kind of situation in personal relationship or in recovery from a group through SoulFullHeart space holding sessions. More about that here: soulfullheartwayoflife.com/sessions
Jelelle Awen is an emoto-spiritual teacher, sacred feminine facilitator, soul scribe, wayshower, multidimensional bridge, lover of love and co-creator and teacher of SoulFullHeart Way Of Life. She is author of  Keep Waking Up! Awakening Journeys To Avalon And Beyond and an upcoming book, Sacred Human, Arising Wonder. Visit soulfullheartwayoflife.com for more information about space holding sessions with her, group calls, videos, community, etc.

What IS Ascension?

By Jelelle Awen

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Ascension invites the stretching upward, the blooming and growing, the awakening and expanding. It is the remembering of what has been forgotten. It is the reclaiming of what has been disowned. It is the loving of what has been judged, both inside and toward others. It is the wanting of MORE from your soul and higher self, shifting away from the desire center of your 3D self who wants comfort and safety and to keep life small and to fit in with others. It is the letting go and mourning and releasing what no longer serves love and the expression of your higher self. It is holding space for all of the reactions that come up in the emotional body in response to this process of letting go.

Ascension invites the rising UP of your consciousness, your awareness, your perception of reality as it shifts from inside you. It is the “Ds” of both dimensions and density with the levels of third to fourth to fifth (and beyond) offering shifts and expansions in your experience of your inner world. Each dimensional shift in consciousness offers a new level of claim. It invites in change and transformation at both the practical and the transcendent levels, as what shifts inside starts to shift what you experience on the outside.

Ascension is an invitation from the Universe and Divine Source to claim and embody what is your birthright as a sacred human expression in bodily form. It is to feel this birthright without expectation or entitlement, yet to understand that it is a GIFT from Divine Source offered to be experienced WITH you. It is the crystallizing of the physical body to vibrate higher and higher to become more and more your merkaba, your vehicle of light and multidimensional travel. Holding space for this transition of the physical body is to trust the symptoms that move through are for the reason of this embodiment of your merkaba.

Ascension invites you to feel what your heart most wants and cries for. What your MORE is that is flushed up and out through desires that come in through your soul. This invitation can press on you, yes, but it never forces. The press comes from your awakening soul and your healing heart. The press comes from your increasing desires for MORE….more intimacy, more connection, more joy, more bliss, more goodness, more service, more empowerment, more inner explorations, more LOVE.

Ascension invites you to feel how the MORE-ness arising inside you can be tamped down and dampened by aspects of you that are afraid for you to desire, want you to remain safe, try to keep you comfortable. These aspects of you, led by your most loyal protector, are in vigilance to keep the MORE at bay in whatever ways and means they can. They are like dams trying to block the flood of love that wants to surge through your life. These aspects of you can release their efforts at blocking through connection with the arising soul infused and authentic YOU.

Ascension is the more and more visceral and lived in expression of New Earth AS your reality in the NOW, not as a future goal, but as a true processing ground of your life. It is baking from within this New and Golden Earth reality, journeying within and visiting this New Earth, and BECOMING this New Earth. So then you ARE this New Earth, inviting others to join you here in the now to experience it with you. It is drawing others to collaborate in the creation of this New Earth in the now as you form a community together.

Ascension invites your service of love with others, in mutual respect and reverence with others. It is the expression of your soul gifts, energizing from and cultivated during other lifetimes. It is the knowledge of your soul coming through to serve and to guide and to share with others. It is moving beyond fear and into the claim WITH humility of what your soul knows and remembers of service with others. It is stepping out of the previous comfortable zones into frequencies of possible resistance and rejection to serve as a beacon of possibility and way showing for those who want it.

Ascension invites your soul to awaken through the warmth of the light of love that increasingly shines as you feel what is YOU in your soul essence expression and what is NOT. It waters the seed of your sacred humanity, watering and fertilizing the bud of your sacred human with love. This bud blooms and grows inside through a process that is just been spring loaded to happen. It wants to expand into your whole BEing with the reunion to Divine Source frequencies so that you experience more and more New Earth AS your reality and yourself as a SACRED human embodying and experiencing life here in the now.

Ascension invites all this and MORE as it cannot really be defined in another way……as it IS beyond the mind where pure experience and essence live and are born in every moment, moment by moment, as the arising expression of love returning to love.

Jelelle Awen is an emoto-spiritual teacher, sacred feminine facilitator, soul scribe, wayshower, multidimensional bridge, lover of love and co-creator and teacher of SoulFullHeart Way Of Life. She is author of  Keep Waking Up! Awakening Journeys To Avalon And Beyond and an upcoming book, Sacred Human, Arising Wonder. Visit soulfullheartwayoflife.com for more information about space holding sessions with her, group calls, videos, community, etc.

Practical Ascension And Parts Work: HOW To Make Changes In Your Life That Reflect Your Soul

By Jelelle Awen

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Practical ascension….this has been floating around in my head for awhile. What IS practical ascension? I was a small business/life coach for five years and we focused with clients on the ‘what’ AND the ‘how’. The ‘what’ was the greater context and vision for their lives and business and the ‘how’ was how to get there. I’ve been asked a few times lately during SoulFullHeart sessions about the ‘how’ of making changes in life that reflect the soul’s awakening desires and pictures about reality.

Going back to practical ascension for a moment…..it feels like where life intersects with concepts, where the spiritual IDEAS that you’ve been learning, reading, and taking in actually implement IN your life and CHANGE your life. Another phase beyond the initial awakening of realizing the inner matrixes that block you and that you no longer resonate with the 3D conditioning you’ve received, and that MOST of what you’ve been taught about reality in school and in life is limited and based in fear.

The soul wakes up through this learning and taking in of ideas, this looking outward for inspiration and sources of guidance and advice. The mind is shifting in this phase, paradigms and entire schools of thought (taught through our schools mostly) are being dismantled. There is a whole bunch of rubble and ash during this phase, which I have connected with transitional fourth dimensional or 4D consciousness (which I write more about here: https://soulfullheartblog.com/2017/02/16/fourth-dimensional-4d-consciousness-alchemical-purgatory-dark-nights-and-profound-awakenings/). This can mostly be happening INTERNALLY, however, as that is where it needs to start, where the seeds of change are watered.

And then, with this watering and baking and dismantling of ideas and shifting through emotional reactions does the soul energy begin to rumble to make ACTUAL changes in your life, to have the outside reflect MORE of your inner transformation. Some of these changes happen TO you as life moves you through the necessary death and rebirth (although nothing happens to you without your participation and choice on a SOUL level). More and more changes though can happen WITH you as you move into the phase of what we could call practical ascension and a more empowered sense of activation in your life fueled by your soul’s momentum and out of the safety and comfort of your 3D self.

This is when ALL areas of your life want to move into a higher vibrational frequency of expression as more and more YOU in your soul essence wants to express and grow. In SoulFullHeart, we look at with you through sessions the seven key areas of life related to this: emotional, spiritual, physical, social, financial, and environmental. Then, we feel into with you how your 3D, 4D, and 5D self may be predominately in expression in each of these areas. There is more about this delineation in this article with some journaling questions you can ask yourself here: http://www.soulfullheartwayoflife.com/3d4d5dselvesquestions.

This is where the HOW comes in….as you then connect with aspects and parts of yourself to feel and negotiate with them around making practical changes to your life, especially within the areas which are causing you conscious suffering and capping your growth. It is the parts of us that hold the emotional body in confusion/blocked/suffering and are basically blocked or clogged frequencies, serving like boulders to block the flow of the emotional body river. NEGOTIATION really is the key word here as it allows the movements forward at a rate and pace that the parts of you that are attached to the old way can digest WITH you (‘You’ being the growing authentic and higher self embodied version of you.)

Differentiating an energy of attachment or resistance or fear as coming from a part of you immediately creates objectivity inside of you (what we call ‘defusion’) as you can now address and feel these reactions. It creates instant metaspace to say, “Part of me feels afraid” and to then BE with and feel this part of you rather than BECOMING this part of you. We often start the process with your protector part as it is negotiation with this aspect that allows for deeper access to the emotional body.

I have discovered no better HOW when it comes to moving life into a place of reflecting our deepest desires and soul expression then through the parts work process.There IS a way to actualize what you most deeply desire to BE in your life that I am inviting you into feeling if you resonate with or at least are open to exploring. Parts work is certainly not the ONLY way, yet I am pressed to offer another that is as catalytic and effective as this one is (and I have searched and researched for many years and yet always come back to parts work as my personal ground of healing and transformation along with what I feel called to offer others for close to 15 years now).There is more about parts work here: http://www.soulfullheartwayoflife.com/parts and I’ll be writing more and more about it as I (and the other facilitators in SoulFullHeart) engage in sessions with more people and they help us co-create it.

Navigating and embracing this parts work reality within myself and with the help of facilitators in the past is HOW I have been able to BE in a sacred union bond for nine years with Raphael Awen and have it deepen, grow, and expand into magical terrains of goodness and MEGA love. Parts work is HOW I have been able to shift a highly self conscious and unworthiness-based relationship to EVERYTHING in my life to one of unselfconsciousness, comfort in self, and self worth. It is HOW I have healed lifetimes worth of karmic playouts and binds within a relatively short period of time (more in the article I shared above about karmic healing and healing your metasoul line.) It is HOW I have been able to heal so much unconscious wounding in my emotional body and to experience life with little to NO emotional triggering or charged reactions now. It is HOW I have been able to inhabit and claim and express my soul gifts and serve love with others as my means of livelihood without compromising.

It is important to offer a HOW to you and not just a WHAT picture (although I love doing that too.) There are more and more spiritual teachers offering parts work as a key aspect of healing the emotional body wounding and more common language of inner child, inner critic, etc. And of course Carl Jung blazed the trail here before us…the emotional body has been left out in spirituality for many years yet the continual ‘proof’ of its need for healing expresses out in abuse patterns, unworthiness-based and unaware ego (another word for the 3D self) based frequencies, inability to make practical changes and navigate IN life and to integrate soul awakenings into every day life, suffering loops inside and in relationships of all kinds. The emotional body is screaming to be included in the picture and parts work dives into the waters of the emotional body immediately with immediate access.

The love that you ARE wants to come in and move through your life…to change your EVERY moment experience of experience. Of course parts of you hold fear about these changes, especially when and if they relate to other people and relationships that are entangled yet still transact love. Being with and connecting with these parts and their fear leads to more integrated self as they relax and integrate their energies over time and the stuck or wounded frequencies vibrate higher and higher. More and more then do you relate with life as a singular “I” that truly IS an I AM energy of embodied higher self frequencies pulsated with innate self worth AND visceral connection to ALL THAT IS.

 

Jelelle Awen is an emoto-spiritual teacher, sacred feminine facilitator, soul scribe, wayshower, multidimensional bridge, lover of love and co-creator and teacher of SoulFullHeart Way Of Life. She is author of  Keep Waking Up! Awakening Journeys To Avalon And Beyond and an upcoming book, Sacred Human, Arising Wonder. Visit soulfullheartwayoflife.com for more information about space holding sessions with her, group calls, videos, community, etc.

 

To The Part Of You That Protects Your Heart

By Jelelle Awen

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To the part that protects our hearts….This is written to the part of us that I believe we all have who is our guardian and protector. They do their jobs so well and we would not make it through life without them….AND this is an invitation for them to begin to rest and so that we can let in MORE love:

To the part of us that protects our hearts,

Will you let me thank you? Will you let in my gratitude? Will you lower your shield a moment so that you can let in my appreciation?

I want to thank you for existing. I want to thank you for coming in during the moments when life was the hardest, when there was the most pain, and when there was the most struggle.

I want to thank you for creating a bubble to ward off energies that would have harmed even more and for transmuting the harsh things so they landed softer. I want to even thank you for the numbness that descended at times so that life could be navigated.

I want to thank you for stepping in when there were no others to protect me. No one else could have cared as much as you have nor been so dedicated to your duty.

I want to thank you for every moment that you have spent in vigilance, watching over, not letting down your guard, not falling asleep on the job. I want to thank you for soaring the skies and the multiple dimensions and for being at the side of my childhood bed.

I want to thank you for all of this, and……..I want to invite you too into something new.

This something new is a relationship where you get to rest more. Where you get to trust more. Where you get to experience love for yourself. Where you get to help open the heart and not just guard it.

This something new is a relationship where I show up to hold my life as an authentic self and you get to help me. You are on my team, yet I am the leader now. I wasn’t there before and I am sorry, but now, I am arising and I have desires.

I want to open my heart to let in others. I want to flow with love and surrender to that flow and wherever it takes me. I want to dance with the currents of change and allow them to sweep me somewhere new.

I want to dance to the music of love without self consciousness or worry about what will happen next or your worry about if I will get hurt.

I am asking you to start resting even as I acknowledge how much you have done for me and that I need you on my team. Always. To help me set healthy boundaries, to help me defend myself if needed for my own safety or self love, to negotiate the rate and pace as I delve into heart and soul terrains.

I need you for these things and you need me to love you. This is new for you, but I feel your needs for love and rest. I am extending my open arms and heart out to you and I am inviting you to collapse into them when you are ready. For the first time, I am here and I can hold you now.

To the part of us that has protected our hearts….thank you and….it’s time to start letting go.

~

This is usually the first aspect that we work with and connect with in our SoulFullHeart Sessions with people as it is negotiation with this protector energy (also manifesting as a controlling energy) that allows for deeper access to the inner child and more suppressed aspects and energies. Through connection in sessions, journaling, dialogue, energy healing, the protective part differentiates from YOU as the arising authentic and embodying higher self.

This differentiation can lead to SIGNIFICANT changes in how you experience life, relationships, and love with much more openness, trust, and capacity to let in. The protector often presents itself as masculine and as a knight or warrior. They can have karmic ties and binds to other lifetimes and energize or appear as etheric guides or guardian angels. They have different ‘weapons’ too, sometimes swords, sometimes energy shields (or both). Identifying how your protector uses weapons and in what situations (and WHY) can be really helpful to understanding when, where, and why your heart feels ‘opened’ or ‘more closed’. It is amazing how universal this energy IS as we have so needed it to navigate 3D life here.

A way to connect with yours is to write a letter to it/him expressing similar to what I did above and anything else you feel about how protective energy shows up in your life. Then, wait for a response and write it down from your protector. You can then begin a dialogue back and forth on paper (and eventually outloud) to get to know each other. In SoulFullHeart, we provide dialogue questions for you and also help to differentiate and identify this energy, which can be challenging to separate or defuse from. It is also the feeling ground of space holding with an open hearted facilitator (who has differentiated from their protector and other 3D aspects) which helps to heal and transmute this energy.

More about sessions here: http://www.soulfullheartwayoflife.com/sessions

More about the SoulFullHeart awakening and healing process here:http://www.soulfullheartwayoflife.com/soulfullheartawakenin…

The audio of this here: https://soundcloud.com/…/to-the-part-that-protects-our-hear…

Jelelle Awen is an emoto-spiritual teacher, sacred feminine facilitator, soul scribe, wayshower, multidimensional bridge, lover of love and co-creator and teacher of SoulFullHeart Way Of Life. She is author of  Keep Waking Up! Awakening Journeys To Avalon And Beyond and an upcoming book, Sacred Human, Arising Wonder. Visit soulfullheartwayoflife.com for more information about space holding sessions with her, group calls, videos, community, etc.

 

 

 

The Energy in motion of our E-motion-all Body

By Raphael Awen
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Until we surrender to our feelings, we are stuck in a stasis.

It has been said that our emotions are our e-motions, or our ‘energy in motion’. If life is anything, on whatever level you wish to look at it, be it physical, spiritual, metaphysical, micro, macro,….all of it is energy in motion.

And what you are feeling right now is energy moving through the energy-in-motion that YOU are. You are reading this seeking something. That is desire, want, seeking, moving through you. E-motive-ly. This is your motive for being.

People have long advised and devised multitudinous ways to overcome our feelings, reprogram our feelings, numb our feelings, but what we have failed to see in every one of these proposed solutions to our feelings is that the solution is proposing another feeling overlay to the one deemed unwanted.

We’re left with a inner war of feelings where one part of us in our psyche seeks to maintain dominance and control over another part of ourselves. This controlling part is then essentially running our lives, living our life as us. And gratefully so, some ‘one’ needs to look after life, until a new arising authentic us can show up to the relief of all involved.

Why we’ve worked so hard collectively to suppress and demonize (in many cases literally) our feelings is up for ongoing discovery, but for me, what feels so apparent is that it has been a way and a strategy for us to regulate the pace of our growth to what for most is a snail’s pace, or even a reverse direction, born out of the very real fear of our own bigness. Our feelings are the portal to our own greatness and the doorway out of our stasis into the infinity of love that we actually are.

Am I saying that feelings of depression or anxiety or rage are this portal to more? What about something so debilitating as shame, or the related inner critic? Are these emotions moving through me somehow a portal to my deeper essence?

‘Why,’ you may say, ‘I’ve always perceived these dark emotions as the barrier to my arising, not any portal to my ongoing awakening.’

I so get that. I too lived in that domain most of my life. What I want to offer you and offer you deeply is a ‘what if?’ question to feel and see where it takes you.

Here goes:

‘What if what you’ve related to as your negative emotions are actually the portal to more and more of your authentic-self arising to lead and flow in life?’

This what-if question (and its quest) could go on and on, worded in so many ways, but you get and feel the tone of it. I know you do…I can feel you do, or these words wouldn’t be holding you right now.

Wow, if this question is pointing you where I think it is, then there is no such thing as a negative (negating) emotion. There is only invitation into what is, to more of the all that you are, that is awaiting you. Why would any one of us be okay with leaving a part of us behind!?

Of course, I so get and feel the resistance we’ve all worked so hard at to keep our emotional worlds from infecting our self image togetherness. We, men more so, but women too, have relegated the emotional body to the insubstantial, to the meaningless, to the powerless, when in actuality, it is the essence of what we are. And we don’t get to embrace our essence any other way, but by going inward to all that we are, getting to know and feel who stands at the door of our hearts that we previously feared, but now open out to in genuine curiosity and love.

Now we finally cease demanding that some one else takes care of us in the multitude of ways we can do just that bass in a medicative relationship to all of life, and we begin instead taking care of ourselves in an ever deepening way beyond what we’ve ever known or imagined.

In SoulFullHeart, we take seriously each arising part of us and get to know and feel them intimately without judgment toward their charge and strategies, but instead open out to feeling why they are the way they are, and why they feel what they do, with all the time and process needed, with tears of gratitude for all they held in our absence.

My truth is that only as this kind of rigorous self-differentiation process, recognizing the emotional body, grounded in our everyday life and relationships unfolds for us, can we genuinely trust that our draw to spiritual practices are not simply another drug of medication to numb and keep unfelt emotional pain at bay.

If we have not embraced the emotional body, our seeking of Ascension or ‘raising our frequency’ becomes very suspect as simply a way to transcend our essence as a human being.

That may work for a part of you, but is it enough for you?

How much richer and fuller could your Ascension awakening be if no part of you gets left behind, allowing all of your energy in motion to fully flow into the infinite magic and wonder of life?

Raphael Awen is co-creator, teacher, and facilitator of the SoulFullHeart Way Of Life. Please visit soulfullheartwayoflife.com for more information about space holding sessions, group calls, retreats, writings, and more.

Five Reasons Why It Is Challenging To Set Healthy boundaries

By Jelelle Awen
boundarysetting

The process of boundary setting and perhaps taking space in relationship or breaks is an important one related to our ascension process and arisement of our 5D self as every relationship we are in is an energy exchange. It is a key aspect of growing and arising into our soul self as every energy we engage with is a reflection of us. This process of sorting through relationships and setting and BEing boundaries is an aspect of the transition and awakening into your 4D self.

I feel setting a healthy boundary with someone in a relationship as being about the sense that we can no longer be in relationship with them or we need space from the relationship because it isn’t healthy or self loving for us to remain or because we just don’t have the reSOULance value ground to BE in relationship any longer (even as love remains). A ‘porous’ boundary would be one that is open to being changed if the person changes or if the ground of the relationship becomes healthier through inner healing work, soul awakenings, or shifts and choices that happen.

Every boundary has a door, just as every fence has a gate. Healthy boundary setting can be done with an open heart, with love and compassion for both the person and ourselves, and before the relationship reaches high levels of toxicity or codependency that is harmful to both sides. This is challenging in our culture, however, and most people struggle a lot with this and how to BE with it.

Why is it so challenging to set boundaries with people in relationships, even when the level of abuse and toxicity is obvious to us? There are many possible answers to this question that could be applied in a universal way even as every individual situation is different.

1) One of the reasons it is so challenging to set and BE in healthy boundaries is because most of us received no modeling on how to do or be this with our caregivers AND we weren’t ‘allowed’ to set any boundaries with our families prior to adulthood.

We are such sponges, absorbing all the energies and emotional tones of our families as we grow up. By the time we are teenagers, we are so filled up with these tones and energies that part of us begins to rebel against what we had no choice in absorbing, which is a form of boundary setting. Some of us continue this rebellion until adulthood and eventually our boundary setting with family may end up being a complete push away or break from them for a phase of time or for life. Most of us are not invited to set boundaries with our family members and we wouldn’t anyway because of our food and shelter needs that they provide.

3D conditioning is that we are required to deal with whatever we are given or however we are treated without advocating or defending ourselves and without the opportunity to say, ‘No’. So, we learn how to live with what we inherited and the cost to the expression of our authentic self and the development of the ability to set boundaries out of self love is hugely impacted. Basically, we literally have ‘no idea’ how to set healthy boundaries because we didn’t ‘see’ and ‘learn’ how to do it from our families.

2) This leads into the second reason, which is that we don’t have enough self love or core self worth to lead this navigation of boundary setting. In SoulFullHeart work, core self worth is something that emerges after much processing with the parts of us who don’t find us worthy and yet are tasked with protecting and defending us, such as our inner punisher-critic, our controller-protector, our inner matriarch-patriarch, etc. These parts of us have developed as internal voices and energies inside of us because of the energies and tones we took in from our caregivers.

It is actually an aspect of our self-defense structure to develop these parts of us that keep the messages running that we ‘are not worthy of love’ or ‘are unlovable’ or ‘are crazy’ or whatever the message is. These parts are actually trying to keep us safe by knocking us down first before someone else does (which is what happened in childhood) or before we get too ‘big’ and do unsafe things. I know this sounds strange, but over eleven years of working with people in subpersonality work, I have seen this over and over again. And, of course, I have felt this in myself. Without an innate sense of core self worth and self love, it is very difficult to say ‘no’ to unhealthy frequencies. Saying ‘no’ means that we are saying ‘yes’ to what nourishes us and that we feel that we are worth it.

3) Boundary setting can be challenging because we don’t know which ones to set and which part of us is doing it. Sometimes it can feel like we are setting healthy boundaries because part of us has said ‘no’ to something or a relationship and is shutting it out, but it actually IS necessary for us to go into it or it could lead to our next growth place to go into it. Parts of us (the protector-controller again primarily) actually like saying ‘no!’ but it can be misdirected and misplaced. This part of us can say ‘no’ to people who are trying to help us by no longer enabling us or by bringing us a tough truth that we don’t want to see. Or this part of us can say, ‘no’ to changes that we need to make or tough conversations that we need to have that could bring conflict and more changes. So, this can be a confusing ground to navigate and asking, “Which part of me wants this boundary and why?” is a very important one.

4) Boundary setting can make us look ‘bad’ or ‘not nice.’ For the parts of us that care about our self-image or how others perceive us, it can be very uncomfortable if we are judged by the person (or others) that we are setting the boundary with as mean or not nice. We are so conditioned in our culture around ‘being nice’ and that it is a ‘good thing’…..even as most relationships, if you go deeper, have a layer of toxicity and falseness in them that has nothing to do with being ‘nice’. Many people would rather preserve the self image of being nice even with someone who is NOT nice with them and actually treats them badly. This behavior pattern has usually been strongly modeled by one of our parents or both of them.

5) It’s challenging and nearly impossible to set boundaries with others if we haven’t set them with parts of ourselves. This is a crucial aspect of parts process work: learning when to set a boundary with a part of us when we identify and feel that we don’t want their behavior to continue because it is isn’t self loving. We literally have to set a boundary with them as the 5D arising Higher Self sometimes in order to be ‘bigger’ than the part of us. For example, we feel love for the inner punisher even as we set a boundary with this part of us to stop beating us down with self judgments. Or we have to say ‘no’ to certain things which parts of us use to keep us numb to our deeper feelings. Our growing 4D and 5D self learns to do this in a loving way that is both strong and open. When parts of us feel this energy of healthy boundary setting arise in us, they lean into it. They have been waiting for it our whole lives and parts of us become relieved because finally an ‘adult’ is home to say what is nourishing and healthy and what is not.

Boundary setting transforms relationships, either by closing them down for a period of time or by opening them up to something new. In my experience, both sides benefit from healthy and porous boundary setting, even if one side is leading it (which is usually the case.) Boundary setting doesn’t have to be a ‘one time’ thing in relationships with a dramatic declaration and big fallout, although that is often what happens if it hasn’t been done consistently.

In healthy and authentic relationships, boundary setting is something that is being talked about and negotiated, something that just happens organically and, in an intimate relationship, sometimes several times a day. And, it is porous…meaning it shifts and changes based on the current conditions. It can be porous if both people are working on healing their hearts through subpersonality work and if they are dedicated and committed to serving the LOVE in the relationship. And it feels like in relationships that are mostly based in 5D consciousness frequencies, boundary setting is not even necessary as the Oneness connection and soul ground flows between the relationships in most moments.

Letting go of what doesn’t nourish us in relationships (or in ANY area of our lives), allows us to let in what really DOES….it makes space for more LOVE to arise inside of us and in our lives.

 

Jelelle Awen is an emoto-spiritual teacher, soul scribe, wayshower, multidimensional bridge, lover of love and co-creator and facilitator of SoulFullHeart Way Of Life. She is author of Keep Waking Up! Awakening Journeys To Avalon And Beyond and an upcoming book, Becoming The NEW 5D Sacred Human. Visit soulfullheartwayoflife.com for more information about space holding sessions with her, group calls, videos, community, etc.

Exploring Arising Sacred Femininity Poem And Healing Offerings

By Jelelle Awen

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The inner feminine, for both women and men, waits to be noticed and yet, once felt, she can no longer be denied.

She is made of the stuff of our deepest heart vulnerabilities, tenderest feelings, penetrating stillness, and magical stardust expressions.

She offers a balm to the hurt places, a softer edge to the hardness, and a capacity to infinitely hold what needs to be held.

Uncovering Her is to understand and feel all that is NOT Her as she cannot really be known or owned.

Uncovering Her is to become intimate with the masculinity that has needed to protect and hold Her.

Uncovering Her is to open to the frequencies of the Divine Feminine, of Mother Gaia, and surrender to Her flow, allowing Her energies to provide a sense of the feminine tones that have been suppressed.

Uncovering Her is an invitation to choose your own healing over all else.

Uncovering Her is an invitation to choose love over all else.

~

I am so honored to offer the arising and birthing of the next phase of the SoulFullHeart Woman, an exploration into the grounds of sacred femininity or how the NEW 5D sacred human expresses in female form through the SoulFullHeart process ground. Sacred femininity is an arising mystery, a journey into the unknown and in my personal experience and holding space with women over many years, the MAIN ground for healing is to feel what is NOT feminine and embrace it, love it, and integrate what remains that is authentic. Here is more about SoulFullHeart Woman:http://www.soulfullheartwayoflife.com/soulfullheartwoman

I and Kalayna Colibri offer this exploration of sacred femininity through space holding sessions for women….women around and under the age of 30 (especially those who identify as being indigo, crystal, rainbow souls) with Kalayna. ANYTHING can happen that serves love in these remote (over zoom) or local sessions here in Puerto Vallarta. We hold space for connection with aspects of your heart and aspects of your soul (multi-dimensional from your Metasoul or soul group line and from other lifetimes) bringing about mega healing and transformation; energy healing to activate, clean, energize your ascension or higher vibrational frequency chakras; guided meditation and connection with higher self, Ethereal guides and aspects, Star Being aspects, and whatever else arises in the moment that needs supportive love spaceholding! More about sessions here.

We weave through the seven key areas of life (emotional, spiritual, mental, physical, social, financial, and environmental) and through the lens of the 3D, 4D, and 5D self. More about the seven areas of life through the 3D/4D/5D lens.

I am also hosting a SoulFullHeart Group Call for women on April 15th with Kalayna’s contributions too. I can already feel the Divine Feminine frequencies that want to flow through to you through the guided meditation and the richness of possible arising intimacies through personal sharings from any of you who would like to. More about this call here:https://www.facebook.com/events/210818762733437/ or http://www.soulfullheartwayoflife.com/groupcalls

To the celebration of the feminine and HER time coming in the sun, inside of our hearts and into flow with ALL that Is.

Photo is me and Kaylana at the beach here in Puerto Vallarta, Mexico….connecting through the third eye/sixth chakra….

 

Jelelle Awen is an emoto-spiritual teacher, soul scribe, wayshower, multidimensional bridge, lover of love and co-creator and facilitator of SoulFullHeart Way Of Life. She is author of an upcoming book, Becoming The NEW 5D Sacred Human. Visit soulfullheartwayoflife.com for more information about space holding sessions with her, group calls, videos, community, etc.

In Service Of The Vulnerable Man

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Vulnerability is the portal to our heart`s longing and truest self.  Our most prized gift.  In our `time` here in this dimension many aspects of our soul have been through many painful experiences, as well as the conscious experiences we have had in this life.  It is not a fault for us to have a shield and need to suppress something that feels scary.  All this happens many times on a subconscious and unconscious level.  We created a protection because we know how valuable we are.  How amazing we are.  It was authorized by our Higher Self.  But then the time comes when Love begins to make its way to our doorstep in whatever fashion that may be.  Through pain, challenge, pleasure, or resistance.  We begin to feel the dissonance inside us viscerally and the only really true relief is through letting your Truth be exposed.  

I had deep tears today as I am feeling Love wanting to enter my field and upend all that a part of me has been clinging onto to resist the power of its immense Blessing.  I could feel in one moment all the ways in which I, and my soul aspects, have built walls to keep me from risking and letting spirit lead me to this sacred union.  I don`t judge this.  I used to.  Today was a deluge that comes from letting that authentic feeling of remorse that comes and showers you with all the love you can possibly let in.  It is a mixture of pleasure and pain.  

There is a reason for the invulnerability and a consequence.  The longer we suppress what truly scares us the harder it can be to feel.  However, I have come to believe it happens when it is supposed to happen.  To this part of us, there is no good time to feel our vulnerability and fear.  I have been through many phases of this facing hard truths and feeling fears.  It is a spiral that continues to send us all the healing we need as we need it.  One layer of healing brings us to another layer of shadow until we are becoming more and more in tune with our most authentic self.  It is a sacred process that cannot be ignored in my heart.

I feel this area of vulnerability is a huge part of the collective male experience.  Different men have different levels and comfortability with vulnerability.  There are numerous reasons for it, but ultimately we fear our own power and the unworthiness that covers over it. This is the Age of the Vulnerable Man.  It is time for us to heal our biggest pains so we can enter this Golden Earth that is NOW.  I feel a veil lifted off of me from my tears, but I am not `done`.  I have more to continue to feel as Love continues its dance with me.  I am okay with this.  I honor this. I feel its sacred balm and alchemical manifestations.  Or WOMANifestations when it comes to drawing romance.

So in the end, I could feel the Divine telling me that ascension is not really all about what you know, but it is about what you feel.  It is simply about letting in Love in its most purest and unfettered glory.  Simply stated not so simply surrendered to.  Being vulnerable with ourselves and with each other is the only way to get to the heart of what we were truly meant to be.  To have someone you can trust to hold that space for it is one the most intimate experiences you can have outside of romance.  With each touchstone movement, a new wave of self-love comes in and expands my heart to serve those who are in a space of needing healing.  It is what I am here to BE and serve.  

Gabriel Heartman is a teacher, facilitator, energy healer, writer, poet, and heartist with the SoulFullHeart Way of Life.  You can learn more about him at www.soulfullheartwayoflife.com

 

SoulFullHeart Museletter: Week Of March 13, NEW Writings, Videos And Events

Weekly swimming pool full of sharings from the four of us (me, Raphael Awen Gabriel Heartman and Kalayna Colibri) which we call our ‘SoulFullHeart Museletter’ is out today (as every ‘Friday’). These museletters offer a dip into writings, videos, group call listings, events that you may have missed during the week or just want to take in again. I’m always amazed at what arises out of us all during the week, just flows out in a steady stream to be shared with others. I like to take a moment to feel what has moved through me during the ‘week’ as often the moment is arising in the moment for me without much thought of what has been (more and more anyway…..) This week’s edition features an article by Jelelle Awen about experiencing the GIFTS of the Universe through parts work, which is the primary ground of processing that we offer through sessions, with an excerpt from it below.

Please msg Kalayna Colibri if you would like to receive these museletters in your email every week or email us at soulfullhearts@gmail.com.

Invitation To Experience Gifts Through The Parts Work Process:

So many gems and gifts coming through right now, in insights and remembrances and putting things together. Gifts from guides and galactic aspects, angelic aspects, elemental aspects, presented during everyday life and ‘walking around’ reality. Gifts coming in with the sunlight, every ray of the sun seeming to offer light codes to activate what has been dormant and wants now to wake up and be remembered.

With the sense of wonder in your heart, these gifts can come in to you. With a sense of goodness about yourself and your own worth, these gifts can be received by you. With a trust in love and Divine Source, these gifts can be let in by you.

I have been receiving some comments lately on my writings and videos from some souls who are in a “I don’t see it” and “I’m not experiencing this” and “I am not getting these gifts” phase on their journey. This is a sacred phase too, although not an easy one.

read full article here or by clicking the image below:

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The Wonder Of Magic Available In Your Inner Child

By Jelelle Awen

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The wonder of magic is available in the NOW moment….around and through and AS you. The light codes from the sun shining down and inviting the experience of wonderFULL joy and connection to the magics all around. Mother Gaia offering her PLAYground of natural magics and exploration. The PURE love waves that are all around in every moment are inviting you to experience it.

The wonder of magic can move you beyond the doing. It can move you beyond coming from the mind, the mind tracking EVERYTHING and so experience can’t come in. With the busy thoughts of the mind….usually thinking of yesterday or tomorrow and rarely in the NOW……these busy thoughts block the wonder of the moment. These busy thoughts and busy mind coming from a busy aspect of you label arising wonder and make it a name. These labels dampen wonder.

Knowing can dampen the wonder of magic too, it can kill it before it can even come into BEing. Knowing that comes from the busy mind and the 3D pain body is about numbing and making reality flat….making it KNOWN so that it can be safe. This is different than heart wisdom or soul wisdoms that are remembered and yet allow for exploration into the unknown in every moment. This knowing is lower frequency and it has layers of unworthiness underneath it and lack of trust in life, love, and the Divine.

The wonder of magic is within your inner child and is spring loaded to burst like a comet across the sky. Children feel and come from wonder yet are conditioned to suppress it and to conform and dampen it. Children are conditioned in 3D reality to DO and to KNOW first and foremost…often leaving BEing in the moment far behind as they get older. Yet, it is still inside of you, this inner child, and these frequencies of BEing in wonder that you had as a child.

Healing, feeling, connecting with your inner child moves you into more and more wonder and magic that eventually expresses as your crystalline child essence in 5D. We feel this as an important aspect of ourselves to connect with in SoulFullHeart, many frequencies of hurt and shame and unworthiness contained in the unhealed inner child expressing in our lives that through space, time, and love begin to heal and transmute.

The wonder of magic is yours to let in and experience again….it lives inside your inner child and can be revealed again as you go within, reclaim and love and embrace this energy inside until it can arise as loving wonder again.

Jelelle Awen is an emoto-spiritual teacher, soul scribe, wayshower, multidimensional bridge, lover of love and co-creator and facilitator of SoulFullHeart Way Of Life. Visit soulfullheartwayoflife.com for more information about space holding sessions with her, group calls, videos, community, etc