Ready to Launch

 

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Inside the heart lie the propellers of our greatest flight.  They are covered over by the weight of our deepest wounds and fears of our darkest places.  They remain scattered among the soil of our emotional terrain.  If we truly wish to bring our most prized possession, our humanity, with us on this next phase of emergence, we will need to go the places that anchor this incredible power and potential.  

Like a spring that has been compressed, we hold our own version of kinetic energy.  Stored in our emotional body, cells, and DNA.  For men, I feel many of us are in conflict with that energy.  What does that power actually look and feel like outside the unhealed domain of fear and control?  The collective shadow of that control that we share and are not totally conscious of at its roots.  We are not responsible for moving that individually but it does exist inside of us to whatever degree it does.  What rage still resides inside of our hearts that has yet to be tapped into and loved with compassion and understanding?  

Without going in and seeking to feel the answers to these questions there is something of our most impassioned essence that leaves us in a state of stillbirth.  We can try some end run around this by focusing on mental pursuits or spiritual bypassing, but the heart will always bring us back to itself.  That is a definitive statement but it just feels true to me.  It has been true for me.  No matter where you go, there you ARE.

As men, we have this inherent need for quest and journey.  For creation and manifestation.  For exploration and expression.  The fire in the hearth of the feminine.  It aches to launch out into the cosmos of the soul with reverence and also abandon.  It will apologize later if it needs to.  There is a wildness that doesn´t follow the rules and seeks to tear them down.  To make bold claims and empowered choices.  The masculine is on a path of fully embodying the sacred pyre and seeking union with its feminine counterpart.  More than twins.  Two separate yet catalytic co-creators.  

This journey begins in the heart.  Lifting and loving those anchors off the propellers so the heart can fly WITH the soul with the body as its vehicle.  It is having a relationship with this aspects of ourselves that mitigates this endeavour of the arising wonder of the sacred masculine.  Who are we in our most enlightened state as we lighten the anchors inside?  I am on this path inside myself daily through the SoulFullHeart Way of Life as the portal to my highest expression.  It has served much growth inside me and desire to serve that to others who are feeling the swirls inside them as well.  The feeling of uncertainty or desire for more heart-centered conversation and expression.  
The men´s group call is a container for Raphael Awen and I, to lead a meditation and discussion into our masculine hearts, our connection to the cosmos, and our desire for love and romance with the queens of our feminine fancy.  It aims to be a great launching pad for our growing desire for community and brotherhood of heart. Both of us so look forward to going on this journey with you.

http://www.soulfullheartwayoflife.com/events

Gabriel Heartman is a teacher, facilitator, energy healer, writer, poet, and heartist with the SoulFullHeart Way of Life.  You can learn more about him at www.soulfullheartwayoflife.com

On Showing Up

By Raphael Awen

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Never before are we being asked to show up like we are right now.

But what does it mean to ‘show up’?

The show is the show of your life, as you know it right now, as its unfolding before you. It is who and what is in your face, in your inbox. It is who has your number. It is what’s happening in public and private.

There’s a new word in our culture for the disappearing act people play when they want to exit a situation without facing a goodbye. It’s called ‘ghosting’. ‘Love bite’ is another very real scenario where a couple meet and soar to some mega heights of intimacy and sexuality, only to have one party inexplicably exit the relationship, leaving the other devastated.

Until we face and complete a situation or a relationship, we haven’t grounded the lessons life was wanting to give us through that very real drama in the show of our lives.

But what would propel us to avoid such completions? Could it be that subconsciously we are simply afraid to go on to our next lessons? Like the now quite famous saying of ‘our greatest fear is not that we are small, but rather that we are great beyond measure.’

I so believe that we are in the school of coming to terms with our own greatness, and this is what is going on in our relationship playouts. Life is ever seeking to lead us to know, feel and integrate our own bigness, the infinite love that we actually are, but have willingly forgotten, in order to be remembered into an even larger version of ourselves from the us that chose and surrendered to the forgetting.

Life is ever seeking to take us out into the deep waters beyond the fear of our own greatness into entirely new terrains that consciously we have yet to be introduced to. Life provides the path and stepping stones for us, but it only works to the degree we are willing to show up for it.

Showing up is about knowing what you really and truly want, and being willing to claim that, and then being willing to show up further for any of the fallouts and fallins that occur because of that claim.

Showing up for anything or anyone in life is only real if it begins with truly showing up for yourself in this way. Many will expound the virtues of selflessness here as a way to mask their fear of their own greatness. Showing up for others when you are not showing up for yourself is actually a form of cocreated and mutual abuse between you and the person you are supposedly helping. It’s a pact of mutuality to stay safely small known as caretaking.

Then these ghosting and love bite scenarios are the only option that’s left for people when their self worth is worn too low to sustain any more perceived loss to that meager self worth.

All of this changes intensely however when one begins choosing this new integration of showing up for themselves. Simply becoming honest with oneself reverses decades and even lifetimes of self-disintegration.

Where is life asking you to show up right now? I feel I can promise you (hopefully without sounding too parental) that if you are willing to show up for your own desires in this way, life will meet you and grace you with all that you need to navigate that choice point. Your choices are a very literal portal into the next versions of yourself that life is wanting to birth in you.

I’m showing up for a men’s group call tomorrow and I want to invite you to show up for it as well if this juice and energy calls to you. The group calls we lead most weekends are about introducing a path that we call SoulFullHeart and I invite you to check out our website as fully as it calls to you at soulfullheartwayoflife.com. The men’s group link for tomorrow is below (and there is a women’s group call that Jelelle is leading on April 15th..)

https://www.facebook.com/events/1123512704444039??ti=ia

Raphael Awen is co-creator, teacher, and facilitator of the SoulFullHeart Way Of Life. Please visit soulfullheartwayoflife.com for more information and inspiration.

As You Awaken, How Is Your Heart?

By Jelelle Awen

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As you fly to the heavens, how is your heart?

You can fly to the heavens and BE with angels. You can BEcome more of the transcendent BEing that you ARE. You have been more of this substance of light and AIR then you have been anything else. You have been more of the stars, then of Gaia and a human body. You have been more soul than fleshy substance even if you feel that you have many lifetimes on Earth, what you might call ‘past lives’ although they are in the NOW…

Yet….As you go on your quest to the stars, how is your heart?

Your heart reflects your capacity to FEEL, to CARE, and to LOVE….the BEST of what makes you human. Your heart also reflects your emotional body and your pain body, your 3D body…..the place where the energies are stored of what you have experienced and felt as a human in this 3D reality and what still needs to be digested. You can BEcome more and more transcendent, yet, your emotional body has pain and congestion and it will anchor you to lower frequencies. Its unhealed places will draw situations to repeat out suffering patterns for you to see and feel. Your soul frequencies, your transcendent nature, can be used by aspects of you that don’t want to feel, that want to bypass heart healing, that want only light and no dark or shadow exploration.

As you awaken your soul, how is your heart?

As your emotional pain body heals, the anchorings lighten up, the aspects of you that guard, that hold the suffering frequencies, that are emotionally reactive in a charged way, that resist letting in love….these aspects transform into their higher frequencies, and eventually integrate into your sacred human/higher self embodiment. Your soul awakening can then ground into Gaia and into your healing and healthy human heart. And you heart vibrates at a higher frequency of health, it becomes more connected to the Christ Consciousness heart, the Mother Mary Consciousness heart, the cosmic heart.

As you become more of your cosmic BEing, how is your heart?

You are meant to take your heart WITH you on the journey of remembering yourself as a galactic BEing. It is your healing heart that brings in frequencies of vulnerability, compassion, reverence, humility, grace, surrender, relationality, connection, and healthy expression of femininity and masculinity. It is your healing heart that draws nourishing intimacies to you and relationships that water with love both your heart AND your soul. It is your healing heart that compels you to serve love as your highest purpose.

How is your heart? What does it REALLY want and need to experience and have felt in order to let in and BEcome MORE and MORE of the infinite love that you ARE?

Jelelle Awen is an emoto-spiritual teacher, sacred feminine facilitator, soul scribe, wayshower, multidimensional bridge, lover of love and co-creator and teacher of SoulFullHeart Way Of Life. She is author of  Keep Waking Up! Awakening Journeys To Avalon And Beyond and an upcoming book, Sacred Human, Arising Wonder. Visit soulfullheartwayoflife.com for more information about space holding sessions with her, group calls, videos, community, etc.

From Scared to Sacred: Initiation of the Sacred Masculine

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If there was ever a time that we needed a new template for the sacred masculine, that time is now. But where could that come from and what would that look like?

The masculine is always and forever the Sacred Masculine. Masculinity itself is out learning its way into knowing and feeling its essence; an attribute of divinity, out divining its way, through you and I.

Masculinity, like femininity is a polarity of a duality dance, but when either polarity loses its polarity, it loses its attractive energy, its power, its appeal. It is neutralized, neutered, emasculated. It moved from the sacred to the scared. Afraid. Limp. Milquetoast.

That’s where we are now….at the edge of scared trying to see a path that will take us back to Sacred.

I don’t think we need a return to some refurbished tribal hazing ritual over a sleep deprived weekend in a large auditorium gathering of men, with men dressed in fatigues yelling at you like a military sergeant. It’s quite pathetic what we came up with to address this deep hunger for a masculine template. Nature abhors a vacuum, so something will always show up as a filler until something more is ready to lead.

So where’s the arena then? Where’s the training gymnasium? Where do we go to get what we never got, or lost along the way?

True masculine energy is a sovereign energy. It is a king leading his personal kingdom. True king power originates from the heart, and if this heart is anything, it is autonomous. It does what it wants to, when it wants to, and it lives with the results, be they healthy or unhealthy. The queen is no less sovereign, no less individual, offering her portal to the Kings quest for no other reason than she wants to…IF, she wants to. Duty and obligation in this domain of heart, have long given way to desire and choice.

You are already doing this, you just can’t see it. Your life as you know it right now is the perfect gymnasium asking you to show up. So many things await your awakening? So many choices await your decree. The ground of this erection of the true King energy is none other than your life, arising from the sacral chakra…Your life as you know it right now is the true arena, the only training gymnasium…awaiting both your heart-on and your hard-on…your choice, your action, your lead, your pursuit of what YOU actually want!

And you as a man are inextricably linked to all men. Each man is a fractal of every other doing and riding life in the same gender expression vehicle. Your inhabitation of your own sacred masculinity is your greatest gift to all men…and it’s automatic. The ground you gain becomes your gift to all.

You don’t need another man to give this to you, because no man can actually give this to you, but you may find, like I have, that I need an arena of life, with other men to lead this in myself.

If these words juice you and call to you, I’d like to invite you to be a part the virtual group call for men that I am leading with Gabriel Heartman this coming Saturday.

Message me and I’ll give you the details…gotta run, I have a life to lead…. 🙂 and a queen to pursue…

Raphael Awen is co-creator, teacher, and facilitator of the SoulFullHeart Way Of Life. Please visit soulfullheartwayoflife.com for more information and inspiration.

Divine Feminine Energies Coming In To Balance Out Masculine Activations

By Jelelle Awen

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Solar geostorms, sun spot flare ups, photonic light waves beaming down through sun rays…..all this outside activity of stirring and churning, blaring and flaring. It is a fiery picture, isn’t it? A rather masculine energy. Many souls are tuning into this activation energy that ignites and wakes UP as it stimulates our light bodies, our emotional bodies, our mental bodies, our social bodies (new one for me to name, yet feels SO TRUE). All these bodies are like planets in our inner galaxy rotating around the orbit of our soul and the sun of our heart and the moon of our unconscious. All this stimulation can bring up symptoms and unease and detox in all of these bodies too as the 3D self and unaware ego resist, release, and ultimately let go at a rate and pace negotiated by the higher self.

In the physical body as it transitions to 5D light body UP can come the residues of what we have chosen and lived on a cellular level. The toxicities and energies we have taken in of eating BEings that have been killed; the frequencies of chemicals and foods made in laboratories; the exchanges during sexuality that weren’t based in love but something less; the habits and patterns that lead to less vital experience of body, INdigestion. And again, the 3D self can amplify these symptoms, make them worse, grab onto them, suffer or linger in them and the love of the growing higher self embodied YOU invites a moving on, holding space, yet, keep moving on into love.

The emotional body is releasing pain as the higher self YOU is activating love codes, PURE love messages, NEW messages of love to hold space for the movement of what has previously been subconsciously stored to move into the light of your consciousness. Suffering is a tone that maybe you (and parts of you) have gotten USED to, yet it is NOT the tone of Golden Earth, 5D frequency. It is not the tone of the higher self-embodied sacred human. It is not the tone that Gaia emotionally wants to feel anymore. BIG changes may be necessary to move suffering out of your life, to say ‘no more’ to suffering in the emotional body, in the mental body, and in the social body. BIG changes navigated with those PURE love messages coming in, creating a NEW reality where big changes are navigable at a rate and pace that you can BE with.

I feel a Divine Feminine ray, a softness, is beaming down TOO….to balance the masculine activation frequencies, stronger than I have felt Her before as more clearing has happened in the outer grids and in the collective and in souls to allow Her to come through more. It felt foggy to offer Her for all these years as it was bright inside of me and in my soul. She seemed to be shrouded in veils and mysteries in terms of outside perception of Her. Yet, more and more, is Her brightness coming through to be seen and felt and remembered.

The four energies of the Divine Feminine that I was awakened to in 2010 after remembering reiki energy still feel relevant to me as a way to connect with Her as you also embody them more and more AS YOU….this can be for both men and women. The four energies are the Mary ray of pink and blue energies offering purity, innocence, compassion and forgiveness. The Magdalene ray of ruby red offering sisterhood, queen mate, sacred sexuality (with partner or with self). The Kuan Yin PURE white ray offering nondual frequencies, beyond the mind, beyond the body, stillness, and BEing in the Now. The dark, black as night ray of the Dark Mother offering death as a form of rebirth, inviting embracement of the shadow, the necessary dark to go with the light.

It came up yesterday on FB that you can physically see these energies of the Divine Feminine (and Divine Masculine) in photographs when you place yourself in front of the sun and take pictures with a digital camera. What is in your auric field will then revealed to you. The orbs or rays of energy show up in different tones and colors and you can connect with them to feel what they are trying to tell you. Take a moment to feel, hear, and see what these energies are offering to you, what She is offering to you….write down the messages, speak the conversations out loud, bring Her energy into your meditation space. Ask to connect with one of the faces of the Divine Feminine I have mentioned above during meditation and one of them will show up for you…the one you are most needing and wanting in the moment. Or maybe MORE than one…

These energies of four seem to infuse and offer a balance of our femininity within (again, yes, men too). Each one of the ‘faces’ of the Divine Feminine is a reflection of our faces. Each one of their energies offering a mirror to our energies. Like the seasonal shifts, I have felt each one connected to a specific season too even as they are ALL of them. Mary has felt like autumn or fall; Kuan Yin like winter; Dark Mother like spring; and Magdalene like summer. This has worked for me in activating and connecting with them….use what works for you.

 

The Divine Feminine is HERE to balance out the masculine, is needed, and while in more polarity sense now in the mostly still 3D collective consciousness….She moves more toward subtlety as the frequencies raise up. Bring Her into your heart to remember and to bring love into the wounded from birth mother places in the 3D emotional body. Bring Her into your soul to remember and to bring love into the wounded soul frequencies from patriarchal dominance and other lifetime experiences of persecution, hiding soul gifts, suppression of the Divine Feminine. Bring Her in and experience Her reflection of the love that you ARE…

Jelelle Awen is an emoto-spiritual teacher, sacred feminine facilitator, soul scribe, wayshower, multidimensional bridge, lover of love and co-creator and teacher of SoulFullHeart Way Of Life. She is author of  Keep Waking Up! Awakening Journeys To Avalon And Beyond and an upcoming book, Sacred Human, Arising Wonder. Visit soulfullheartwayoflife.com for more information about space holding sessions with her, group calls, videos, community, etc.

When Your Mate And Other Relationships Aren’t Awakening With You: Sacred Feminine Blog Series

By Jelelle Awen

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She is expanding, growing, learning. Each drop of remembered kNOWledge waters the seed of her sacred human self and she so WANTS to grow now. Looking and searching for resonance to mirror her growing sense of soul, she needs the NEW reflection to transform into the NEW her that is waiting, spring loaded to become WHO she REALLY is.

She aches for MORE….more love, more light, more growth, more newness, more connection, more intimacy, more joy, more passion, more realness, more authenticity, more health. She feels this desire for MORE most of her moments and the ways and means to suppress it with distractions are not working as well as they used to. The part of her that wants to protect her from pain and keep her safe TRYS to suppress the wanting and the growing, yet THAT doesn’t seem to be working in the ways that it used to anymore.

Her friends, her family, her mate…they are watching this transformation as witnesses who, on a soul level ‘signed up’ to witness it. Maybe they are uneasy about it. Maybe they are resistant about it. Maybe they are inspired by it. Maybe they are coming along. Maybe they are not.

Oh, and her mate….if he is not feeling the same stirrings and call of healing the heart and awakening the soul, her heart aches to share this WITH him. Staying on her side in moments (let it arise in him through him) and then venturing over onto HIS side again (please come with me!) and back and forth. This is an uneasy dance with it can feel like no easy answers with neither partner doing anything wrong or BEing wrong.

As the dance plays out, she may reach a place where she can no longer ‘shrink’ to the old dynamic ground in the relationship to be with him. The place where they used to ‘meet’ each other has literally collapsed through her own growth and this has CHANGED the ground of their ‘usness’….the third energy created when two people come together in mateship. The usness has shifted from wherever it was when they agreed to BE together as it is based on energy and NOT an actual contract at all.

She may reach this place of not being able to allow the dynamic anymore in a dramatic sweep of realization that leads to immediate changes and transitions and completions. She may reach this in small increments and through negotiations with self and with him along the way. Through this negotiation maybe he WILL come along because it is his time and his desire to be and do so. OR he cannot and yet…..on she moves because now her growth cannot be contained without staying in suffering or in a lower frequency EVEN as love remains.

This is written for and inspired by women I have connected with through SoulFullHeart recently in this situation, finding (and ultimately choosing on the soul level) themselves HERE….in this place of awakening while their mate doesn’t seem to be coming along with them. I feel how this situation can be reversed too, with the man awakening and the woman choosing to remain in the same consciousness frequency….yet it feels to me that most often it happens in this way as yin has tended to lead in these grounds.

Drawing this situation is a reflection of the woman to look into herself. It is an invitation to feel how her mate’s (and those in other relationships) lack of resonance reflects a shadow aspect of herself that is ALSO not in resonance with her growth, a part of her that may resist awakening, or is very afraid of it. If she is deciding to stay within the relationship even without the deeper soul resonance and even perhaps outward resistance and maybe even abusive frequencies, then there IS a part(s) of her that feels the same way for which his lack of resonance represents. Without access to these parts of herself, she will make it about the outside, about him, about others RATHER than about herself for which they are just a reflection. Focusing on the outside in this way leads to disempowerment feelings and more sense of suffering and impotence.

She is not a victim but rather willing participant in this dance until she no longer chooses to be. Going within to find the parts of her that are represented here is the way to access her inner power, to feel possible next steps and choices, to navigate from HER side.

Living within a relationship with mutual resonance of body, heart, and soul with Raphael for close to nine years has filled my woman’s heart with loved UPness, compassion and I can template a NEW way for women to experience themselves within a sacred union ground. And a new way to relate to themselves for which ALL aspects of themselves (even those in shadow) are held and explored with a loving curiosity and tenderness WITH internal boundary setting also happening when it is needed.

There is a NEW way of 5D relationship in which their mate is inspiring them to grow, supporting ALL of their movements which support their soul, and which love becomes more and more pure between the two partners as they dedicate themselves to their inner healing and soul awakening. Often what people feel is ‘love’ in romantic relationship is actually a sticky, codependent frequency of need from one part of them to another part in their mate (example, inner child in the woman hooked up with the patriarch in the man, the matriarch in the woman hooked up with the inner child in the man, inner punishers in both hooked up together.)

It is a complicated dynamic and yet love will steer through it if there is willingness to feel, to heal, to grow, and to be REAL with what the emotional reality actual IS and the degree of suffering over suffering exists from inside. No more suffering becomes the motivation for change until love leads the way more and more with suffering becoming a rarer occurrence. It IS possible to experience this PURE love ground in relationships to the degree it is happening from within, from inside, from one aspect to another.

If you are a woman in this situation, you may need someone to hold space for this process of going within, accessing these aspects of yourself, and I would be honored to serve love with you in this process as it was my own in the past. Go here to read more about that: http://www.soulfullheartwayoflife.com/jelellesessions. I know that Raphael Awen would be honored to serve the male side of the relationship (or if the situation is reversed.):

Jelelle Awen is an emoto-spiritual teacher, soul scribe, wayshower, multidimensional bridge, lover of love and co-creator and facilitator of SoulFullHeart Way Of Life. She is author of Keep Waking Up! Awakening Journeys To Avalon And Beyond and an upcoming book, Sacred Human, Arising Wonder. Visit soulfullheartwayoflife.com for more information about space holding sessions with her, group calls, videos, community, etc.

Messages from the Sun Of Warmth, Changes, Light, And Love

By Jelelle Awen
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I lay down at the sun’s altar of sand and sea, receiving its gifts of coded energies and language in the light. I feel its warmth beaming down on me in varying degrees with subtle shifts in heat, intensity, and frequency from day to day. I take in the messages through my hungry skin, through my purifying pineal gland, through the stones I place near me, through my crystallizing and transforming cells, through my opening and healing heart, through my expanding and waking UP soul. I feel much gratitude to the sun (and the cosmic sun too) for what it GIVES and GIVES of life, of light, and of love.
This is what I hear when I listen and receive as I lay in the sun and I wanted to share with those of you on this fast track of ascension and awakening for which the SUN seems to be a primary source of collective support, Universal activation, and galactic connection to create changes both inside and outside….
The sun’s warmth says to us, “Trust that life is GOOD. Trust that life is based in LOVE. Trust that life is WARM. Trust that life will return to warmth, goodness, and love even when it FEELS (and may need to be) temporarily cold or hard. Trust that THIS warmth is the essence of YOUR heart and soul too.”
The sun’s catalytic energy says to us, “You can GROW. And you don’t HAVE to suffer anymore. Feel ANY aspect of your life that is leading to suffering. Feel the deeper reasons WHY. Feel the power that you have to change whatever it is from INSIDE of you. To Feel and heal. To be with the aspect of you that is attached, that is sacred, that is settling, that is suffering. BE with this inside and the OUTSIDE will change. You will BECOME this change as more and more SELF love overflows moving you from suffering and into love.”
The sun’s NOW presence says to us, “NOW is the TIME. NOW is the time to change the INNER to experience the GOLDEN EARTH, 5D REALITY, that you most WANT and desire. It IS now. Your inner grids are preparing to support this new experience of reality. Your DNA is arising to recode you to this new frequency. You inner matrix is dropping so you can see more clearly your bigness. Your inner veil is lifting so you can remember your soul legacy and connect with your other lifetimes. NOW you can BE all of this.”
The sun’s light says to us, “You are meant to SHINE. You are meant to TURN ON your beacon. You can turn it from inside of yourself with self love that then SHINES it out to others. You become like a light house for yourself and others, your beaming heart helping to navigate the rocky waters and the sudden storms. You become a way shower, shining the light in the darkness for yourself and others to find your way back again to the light.”
The sun’s love says to us, “PURE Love is the ONLY constant. You can return to it over and over. You can lay in it, soak it in, feel it FILL you up again. You can use it to raise your frequency to a higher rate and pitch and tone. You can experience it with your guides, which you BEcome more and more over time. You can experience PURE love more and more in relationship as you draw those that reflect this to you AS you. You can experience the PURE love that you ARE and have ALWAYS been…..infinite and constant as I am.”
Photo is of the SUN yesterday here in Puerto Vallarta, Mexico….
Jelelle Awen is an emoto-spiritual teacher, soul scribe, wayshower, multidimensional bridge, lover of love and co-creator and facilitator of SoulFullHeart Way Of Life. She is author of Keep Waking Up! Awakening Journeys To Avalon And Beyond and an upcoming book, Becoming A 5D Sacred Human. Visit soulfullheartwayoflife.com for more information about space holding sessions with her, group calls, videos, community, etc.

An Inner Fireplace, Going Within, BEing with Self

By Jelelle Awen

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A day spent yesterday of being with me, relaxing, feeling mellow, being more inward than outward, moving some lower frequency/subtle toxicities through…not my usual JOY and high energy frequencies yet these are good days too actually! A ‘recharge’ of the love batteries from going inside which leads to offering more in overflow to others, especially for our group call today and right NOW in this moment of shared creativity.

There are times where self space holding is not specific or something big to process, yet just a sense and commitment and desire of BEing with self. A true desire to BE with self, not an ‘obligation’ or ‘should’, but because there is NO ONE you would rather be with than yourself. Making space for self and not ‘giving out’ too much. Feels like an incubator space created for one that we can return to over and over again!

I was an only child growing up and also a ‘latch key’ kid and my birth parents didn’t get home often until late. So, I had glorious hours to myself after school and these were my moments to BE with self, to play pretend, to dance, to sing, etc. Sometimes I played with friends or hung out with others, but mostly I cherished this time to myself as it was for and with ME and it helped me digest the intensities of the day and from the dynamics of my birth family. In this way, I believe I chose to be an only child in order to build up this container of sense of gloriousness about self time. I rarely have experienced being lonely this life because of the sense of a rich inner world that has bubbled over into my life.

In 3D, everything is outside. There isn’t an internal incubator because everything vibrates from outside of self. There is no ‘there there’ inside and the inside is like an empty chamber yet with ping pong emotional reactions clashing around (largely unconscious) and soul karmic frequencies simmering and bubbling (again, largely unconscious). There isn’t a strong self love and awareness fireplace to hold the fires that come up and so ALL of what comes up in self gets burned in the process. There is smoldering fires and ash everywhere inside of the 3D self.

The outward focus then is seeking for things to entertain constantly, to divert constantly, to control constantly, to numb constantly in the 3D self as conditioned by a 3D world. It is a constant search by the 3D self for the NEXT activity, thing, person…that will maybe even provide ALL of these aspects of entertainment, control, diversion, and numbness. So much of 3D cultural expression is based on this unground NEED and, really, obsession with outside distraction.

A big aspect of 4D awakening is the awakening to SELF and the glorious pleasure of creating and experiencing a growing self fireplace and incubator. And less and less NEED for outside distraction, numbing, and diversion. You are more just content with what is inside and going inside through meditation becomes the entertainment ground with vast rich terrains opening up inside of you. Not used for distraction though but actually in order to feel, in order to heal, in order to grow, in order to INtegrate the soul.

The 4D self has ups and downs, deaths and rebirths, discoveries and integrations, yet it is held in a CONSCIOUS and AWARE context of growth and awakening. THIS is a big difference from the 3D unconscious letting life just happen and being reactive consciousness that draws drama after drama to be victim to. The 4D self more and more feels how everything that you experience OUTSIDE of you is a reflection from INSIDE of you.

In this growing lived-in truth is empowerment, is the completion of feeling like a victim and life is happening to YOU. This is the growing sense of trust and surrender to your connection with All That Is and Divine Source. This is the transition into the frequencies of unity-yet-individual consciousness that is 5D and beyond where the self is revealed through the peeling and burning away with self love ALL the layers of persona, self image, and 3D conditioning to REVEAL and REMEMBER the soul that is a fractal from Divine Source in human expression as Infinite Love….

Jelelle Awen is an emoto-spiritual teacher, soul scribe, wayshower, multidimensional bridge, lover of love and co-creator and facilitator of SoulFullHeart Way Of Life. She is author of Keep Waking Up! Awakening Journeys To Avalon And Beyond and an upcoming book, Becoming The NEW 5D Sacred Human. Visit soulfullheartwayoflife.com for more information about space holding sessions with her, group calls, videos, community, etc.

Moving From kNOwing To kNOWing

By Jelelle Awen

The-Unknown

In the awakening journey, in this process of ascension…..it becomes more and more about what you kNOW rather than what you kNOw. This is more than just playing around with capital letters. I kept getting offered this over and over and now it has become a sort of mantra to invite us beyond the mind. kNOWing comes from higher guidance, soul wisdom frequencies, reSOULance, weaving in with the higher/Christ consciousness heart openings. kNOWing is the 4D transitional self and the emerging 5D sacred human merged and embodying with higher self frequencies relating with life through exploration, through curiosity, through risking into the unkNOWn in every moment.

kNOwing is the 3D self, leading with what the mind has learned, analyzed, digested, filtered and packaged. Non-vulnerable and rigid, kNOwing caps the frequencies of joyful magic that could and can arise in ANY moment. With kNOwing, nothing can arise or surprise as it is ‘figured out’, its essence drained of possibilities through the figuring and defining.

kNOwing creates a resistive frequency relationship to life and love.

kNOWing creates an open frequency relationship to life and love.

You’ve been conditioned to kNOwing by a culture that cultivates this frequency as a safety bandwidth. Changing your frequency to kNOWing happens through negotiation with the 3D self, through letting go of what is safe and known (what has become just TOO comfortable and isn’t offering growth anymore.) Letting go of what numbs and dulls and flattens everything into the kNOwing space. Letting go of the mind more and more and moving beyond it, in relationship WITH it yet the soul and heart are leading.

Like this picture so beautifully shows, moving into the kNOW is letting go of the comfortable connections sometimes too and risking to leap, to fly, to lunge off of a cliff and into Infinite Possibilities. A deepening connection, a personal sense of the Divine Source waters the frequencies of inner kNOWing, not book kNOwledge. This HAS to happen inside FIRST, over and over, in a loving self held space (and with a spaceholder too in phases) creating safety INSIDE that also allows room for trust to arise in the unkNOWn on the outside.

This safety and trust inside makes the jumping off the cliff feeling movements on the outside bearable, enjoyable or INJOYable. It is an internal YES that then can move downstream to the external YES to the kNOWing possibilities in every moment…..

Jelelle Awen is an emoto-spiritual teacher, soul scribe, wayshower, multidimensional bridge, lover of love and co-creator and facilitator of SoulFullHeart Way Of Life. She is author of Keep Waking Up! Awakening Journeys To Avalon And Beyond and an upcoming book, Becoming The NEW 5D Sacred Human. Visit soulfullheartwayoflife.com for more information about space holding sessions with her, group calls, videos, community, etc.

That Scrambled Self-Image

by Kalayna Colibri

Jens Hesse_sat31_orchids_2011_84x51

Painting: “Orchids” by Jens Hesse

www.jenshesse.com

The battle seeds of “that, not THIS”

are planted deep and early.

They live, embedded, unbroken

for so so long,

watered by the choices they fuel.

These choices WE make

can bring them out to the sun

to be seen, felt and brought to light.

Victims to their siren call, we are NOT

as we continue to choose to listen

instead of feel…

 

Who and what we are told to be,

those who tell us are telling themselves,

and we in turn keep telling OURselves.

We poke, pull, prod

at those aspects we painfully, straining

excessively work to change,

not letting in the beauty

we are and were ALWAYS

intended to be a part of.

 

This woven fabric of our lives

becomes a threadbare tapestry

of power-filled lies

we tell ourselves in each moment

we don’t feel ourselves deeper…

The mirror of life

shows us where to go inside

invites us to be with others

to see a reflection

for what to heal next…

to find our deeper self

who knows

just kNOWs…

who we really are,

what we are really worth,

and that no one

EVER

has had ANY real say

in what that ACTUALLY means…

 

There is so much,

too much

pain.

From us to us,

NOT just them to us…

There is a lot

buried deep

we are digging up now…

bringing forward now,

being felt in now…

if we can take that next step.

Ask for support.

Say YES to love,

starting with OURSELVES

and those seeds we’ve grown inside us

that need that love

to remember

that this is what they were made of in the first place.

 

Let that light of your inside heart-shine

glow in your deepest feeling place desires.

Those ones that don’t beckon

to your image-based ticks and jabs

but instead

show you who

what

you really, mostly deeply

ARE…

 

***

Kalayna Colibri is a SoulFullHeart facilitator, energy healer, indigo-crystal bridge and healer, writer, and poetess. Find out more about the SoulFullHeart Way of Life at www.soulfullheartwayoflife.com